"Good morning, Sunshine!" Laura sing-songs as she pulls the blinds open.
Oh. My. God. Stiles is going to kill Laura. Slowly and painfully. If he manages to actually catch her. He needs a plan. And Derek's help. And maybe Diana's too. Mama Hale loves him, surely she would help him, right? Ugh. Too early to think.
"Wha tim's'it?" He slurs, trying to roll over but falling from the bed tangled in the sheets instead. Where is Derek? Is that coffee he smells?
"It's at least 9 a.m., you lazy arse!"
Oh my fucking God, he is so going to shoot wolfsbane in her little werewolf's arse!
He crawls from his prison of sheets towards the bathroom, hoping to escape Laura's shrill voice of doom and maybe finish his night on the comfy little mat on the floor, or even make himself a little nest with Derek's clothes he can see hanging on the towel warming bar but nope, fate is against him apparently because she just grabs him and hauls him up, pushing him towards the door that leads to the stairs.
"Come on, now, pup! Up and at 'em!"
She grabs a shirt from the bar though and pushes it in his arms so he won't have to flash everyone (he sleeps in boxers) and then just follows him all the way down the stairs, steering him where she wants him to go until he's faced with the whole family sitting at the table for breakfast. Ooooh, yeah, Sunday routine. He had completely forgotten.
He waves a little at everyone and gets six waves back with "hellos" and "heys" and "good morning Stiles" all around. The youngest in the family is having a camping week end a howl away from the house so it's only Michael, Peter, Alyssa, Laura, Nick and Derek at the table. Diana leaves the stove and kisses his forehead, passing a hand in his hair.
"You hair is all messy, didn't Laura let you clean up a bit before she bullied you downstairs?" She asks him with a fond smile and a raised eyebrow towards her daughter. Of course, she knows exactly what happened upsatirs: werewolf hearing. This is all good natured but everyone has tendencies to be kind of very protective of Stiles since he's, you know, human. The only one. Of the family. Still. Don't tell Mama Hale, but he doesn't really mind.
He's pushed towards the table, and Derek reaches towards him, opening his arms. He's still mostly asleep and thus doesn't even protest when he's pulled in Derek's lap.
"Good night?" Peter smirks. Stiles blushes such a deep red, he can feel the heat travelling down his neck. Derek and him hadn't been able to keep their hands to themselves last night, and he had had to literally bite the pillows not to make noise. Of course, now it seemed ridiculous since, you know, werewolves. He might as well have been screaming his lungs out for all the good it had done. Ugh. Derek pushes his chest out, pride in every line of his body. Of course he would be proud. Bastard.
A soft thump pulls him out of his head.
"Leave them alone or no pancakes for you." Ah, Papa Hale is always there to protect him.
Stiles pushes his face (still blushing faintly) in Derek's neck, little purring noise making its way out of his throat unbidden: he's spent so much time around werewolves that he pretty much picked up their habits of making noises to translate his emotions (in the house it's all game and fun until they're not in the house anymore and he's whimpering at Derek in one of the Supermarket's aisle. Yep, awkward.)
Derek slides his cheek against Stiles', taking a deep inhalation making his chest puffs out and Stiles curls in his lap, pushing his head back. Derek makes a rumbling noise deep in his chest, scrapping his teeth gently against Stiles' throat.
"Smell good." The words are whispered against his skin and Stiles feels a little waft of arousal coming up. A wolf whistle (HA!) interrupts them, followed quickly by another thump and Stiles hides his face in Derek's chest once more.
"Ow! D, that hurt!"
"It was supposed to. Leave them alone!" She casts a stern look at his brother-in-law before turning her attention to Derek and Stiles again. "Now, I wanted to ask-"
"Oh oh." Mike sing-songs and hides behind his newspaper. Thump. "Ow!"
She raises an eyebrow at his husband before once more looking at Derek and him. "I was saying, I wanted to ask if maybe you had thought about how ooooold I was, turning 53 this year and all and if maybe grandchildren were being discussed? Not that I'm putting pressure on you, not at all, I wouldn't-" snort - thump - "ow!" "-but you know. This would be good to, you know, see my grandbabies grow up. Soon." She looks pointedly at Stiles.
Oh Sweet Baby Jesus. Think, think, think, say something dammit!
"Why don't you ask the question to Laura?" Oh my God, Derek I love you so much!! You are so smart and beautiful and-
"I did but you've been together longer, Stiles and you." -noooo, Moms' logic are so flawed GOD WE'VE NEVER EVEN BROACHED THE-
"Yeah, but she's older than me. One would expect she has kids before I do." -YES MY MAN IS BRILLANT HOW DID I EVER SURVIVE WITHOUT-
"Derek Matthew Hale." -OH SHIT SHE'S USING FULL NAMES- "Stop trying to report my attention on Laura, your sister and I talked and I know her stance on the subject. Now I want yours."
"It's not that I don't want kids, Mama-" -YES THERE GOOD APPEASE HER THAT WAY- "-but I think Stiles isn't ready for that yet, he's too young-" -THAT FUCKING TRAITOR OH MY GOD NO SEX FOR A MONTH YOU JERK I'LL SHOW YOU TOO YOUNG- "-and... Well, to be honest, we haven't discussed the subject. We're still in our honey moon phase and I like it like that for the moment." -...FINE YOU WIN, I'LL GIVE YOU SEX BUT YOU BETTER BE CAREFUL NEXT TIME OR YOU'LL END UP ON THE COUCH!!
"I think he's having an internal freak out." Laura's voice is like honey, she sounds gleeful about the whole situation. Stiles was sooo hiding that herb which makes them sneeze under her pillow. He might even rub it all over her clothes. LET'S SEE WHO WILL BE LAUGHING, HA! "Oh God, he has that look on his face. You know, the plotting one. Should I be scared?" She sounds less gleeful now, bordering on worried even. Stiles smirked, Laura swallows hard. Diana ignores their shenanigans, fixing Derek with what could only be described as a puppy look. She's pouting.
"Fine, but don't take too long, okay? I want to have plenty of times with your cubs, Derek. Plenty."
She turns around towards the stove once more, finishing to make breakfast and letting Stiles cogitating with that newfound perspective. God, this family was going to be the death of him.