Dave stood there, at a loss for words in every way. Vibrant blue eyes watched him sadly; they were expecting something that he couldn't give. There was a beat of silence, and then a woeful sigh. Were Dave able to make himself look up, he would see John's shoulders slump slightly, and the look of pain on his face. He would see the heart breaking behind those square lenses that complimented his face so well.
“...Okay.” John said slowly, as though trying to make time for Dave to speak up.
Dave heard him take in a deep breath. In his mind he could see his shoulders becoming straighter. A simple gesture that he had come to love in the other; it was filled with resolve and determination usually. But it shattered his heart this time. He couldn't help but think about how it was almost funny that the same action could make a smile spread across his face and also make him want to crumple to the floor.
“Bye, Dave.” The words came out colored with disappointment and sorrow.
Dave didn't look up until he knew John was gone.
- - - -
“Rose, you don't have to do this!” Jade pleaded desperately. She grabbed onto the other girl's sleeve and tried to make her face her. The blonde head stayed where it was, though, despite her efforts. The dark-haired girl gritted her teeth, fighting back the tears that she knew were going to come anyway.
“Why? Why? Just answer me that, and I'll let go.” She spat out, becoming more and more angry as the other continued to not answer or look at her.
“Rose.” Jade said angrily, her voice breaking slightly. Rose's shoulders began to shake. It was a slight movement, but Jade saw it. She knew everything about Rose; the way she wanted to hide her emotions from others. The way she had a difficult time addressing her own problems while she was so ready to help other's with theirs. The way her mask broke.
Jade walked around so she was looking at Rose's face. She turned her head slightly to avoid the piercing green eyes. Jade furrowed her eyebrows, and brought her hands up to the other girl's face. She turned her head gently again, and their eyes met. Rose's eyes reflected the sadness in Jade's. They stared at each other for a long moment, the stares communicating so much more than words ever could.
“...Is this what you want?” Jade broke the silence, her voice almost silent itself. She felt Rose nod slightly in her hands. Jade's eyes closed, and she took a moment for herself.
Rose couldn't help but think about how beautiful she was.
When her eyes reopened, Jade cupped her face a little tighter before leaning in and giving her a gentle kiss on the lips. They parted, and Jade leaned her forehead against the girl's in front of her, eyes squeezing shut against the tears threatening her. Rose closed her eyes, too.
She felt the hands leave her face. Her eyes remained shut. Soft lips met her cheek once more in parting. Rose couldn't bear to open her eyes.
The blonde opened her eyes to an empty room.
She let herself cry.
- - - -
“Honey, I'm home!” John trilled happily as he swung through the doorway of Rose's apartment. Rose looked up from the book she had been pretending to read, and gave him a warm smile.
The tears had run out half an hour ago, and by the time her on-and-off boyfriend had come in, her cheeks were dry, though still rosy. She put the book on her coffee table, and got up to meet him. She stood on her tiptoes and kissed him, as it was the only way for her to reach his lips without him leaning down to meet her. She parted with a smile, and reached her hands up to play with the collar on his jacket. “Well well well, Mr. Egbert. What can I do for you on his fine night?” Rose hadn't been expecting him to come over for quite a while. John slept at her apartment on occasion when they were dating, but he didn't come over until 8:00 at the earliest. Rose couldn't help but be slightly grateful that he chose this night to break the tradition, but she also felt a little nagging guilt biting at her in the back of her mind. She looked up at him, and for a moment saw his sister. She didn't let her reaction show, but instead walked back to the coffee table to pick up the book and properly reshelf it.
“Well, I thought that maybe we could go out to dinner! You know, make a night of it.” He said with his trademark infectious grin. He intercepted Rose on her way to the bookshelf, took her hands into his and began to dance her around the room. Rose laughed lightly, falling into step easily with him.
“What's the occasion?” She asked, already feeling a bit lighter. John had quite a way with making people feel better.
“It's a Saturday night and we're young. We don't need an occasion!” He finished off his sentence by lowering Rose into a dip. They stayed there for a moment, smiling at each other.
“I can't argue with that logic.” She said with a tinkling laugh. John stood her back up and bounded back to the doorway.
He flashed around again, his face slightly flushed. “Go put on your fanciest clothes and do all of that girl shit, and I'll be back to pick you up after I get cleaned up, too.” He raised a hand in goodbye and was gone. Rose waved a little after him and rolled her eyes. She looked down at herself and sighed. She didn't really feel like going out tonight, but that was alright. Sometimes it was best to just let John drag her around. There wasn't a single time where it had happened where she hadn't enjoyed herself, so why would this be any different?
Her traitor mind supplied quite a few reasons, Rose shook them from her mind and walked to her room to get ready for their night out.
- - - -
John chose a very romantic venue for dinner that night. Rose just shook her head a bit when they drove up to the extravagant building, but couldn't help but think how very John the whole thing was. He was a romantic to rival all romantics. The food, though ridiculously pricey, was delicious. The feel of the restaurant was very intimate, and each table (there were only tables for two) had it's own candle. The candle was certainly needed, as the other forms of lighting in the room were dim at best. John picked up the bill though Rose argued and insisted that she would get dinner this time, and when everything was said and done, they went for a walk.
Rose clutched her shrug closer to her body, shivering a little in the chill Fall air. They walked in a comfortable silence, enjoying the city lights and each others company. They started to go through a nearby park, strolling on a path lined with trees. It was nice. Very nice. Rose closed her eyes and took in a deep breath of the crisp air. When she opened her eyes again, John wasn't beside her anymore.
“John?” She called out in confusion, looking around for him. He was stopped a few steps behind her, watching her with an expression that Rose couldn't place. She cocked her head to the side, a small smile of confusion on her lips. She was going to ask another question, but something about his expression made herself stop the words before they came out.
John stepped up towards her, and just watched her for a moment. Rose began to become anxious. Did she do something wrong at dinner? What was he doing?
“Rose...” John began warmly. He reached down and took one of her hands into his. “We've had kind of a crazy relationship, haven't we? We've had some troubles, but hell, an alien told us we were destined for each other. And I think that trumps any troubles we've seen. Don't you think?” He stared at their hands while he spoke, and looked up at her face at his last question.
Rose smiled a little suspiciously. “I suppose?” She said in a question with a little laugh.
John laughed in return. “Now, just stay with me here for a minute, okay?” He grinned and waited for her to nod before kneeling down. There was a sharp intake of breath from above him.
Rose pressed a hand to her chest, her eyes wide. She shook her head a little in disbelief, and shuddered out an answer. “Yes?”
John held her other hand in between his two, and looked up at her with a heart-stopping expression. “I love you.” He took one of his hands away from her's, and reached into his slacks pocket and brought out a small box. He gently put down her other hand and opened the box to reveal a ring with a modest, glittering stone. He offered the box up to her. “Will you marry me?”
The world stopped.
- - - -
-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering gardenGnostic [GG] at 17:39 --
TG: jade please
TG: i need to talk to someone and youre the only one i have
TG: i know youre there
TG: come on
TG: i need you
TG: i cant deal with this alone
TG: i fucked up
TG: i fucked up so royally i can barely breathe
TG: fucking please
TG: im begging you
TG: answer harley
-- gardenGnostic [GG] has become an idle chum! --
TG: god dammit
TG: god fucking dammit jade
TG: youre all i have left
TG: i cant even think about my fucking sister without wanting to punch through a wall
TG: i basically burned the bridge with john by being a fucking idiot
TG: fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
TG: then again you have every fucking right to hate me too
TG: which is why youre ignoring me now
TG: fuck i cant even blame you
TG: id hate me too
TG: hell i hate me now
TG: what am i even doing
TG: like youd want to pat my back right now anyway
TG: oh thats okay dave you just screwed up your life and screwed me over too in one fell swoop thats cool here cry on my shoulder
TG: why thank you jade how considerate
TG: im sorry jade
TG: im so fucking sorry
TG: i wont talk to you anymore if thats what you want
TG: but just please
TG: say something now
TG: say it
TG: oh god
TG: thats what he said hahahahahahh motherfucker i cant do this
-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering gardenGnostic [GG] at 17:51 –
Well! This chapter was a shit ton of fun to write. It's not like super long or anything, but I think I need to work up to longer chapters. This is my first fanfic in like, five years. And my last fanfic was during my Dark Phase. So. If that means something, then okay. Thanks for reading!
Borrowed and slightly modified this headcanon/post:
You are cordially invited to
the wedding of
on Saturday afternoon
October the 25th
at one o' clock
followed by a reception
Dave crumpled up the invitation and threw it as viciously as one can throw a small crumpled up piece of paper in the general direction of his trash can. Why the SHIT did Roxy send him this?
Dave was shaking. He stalked over to his refrigerator and grabbed a bottle of apple juice out of the door, slamming it shut with much more force than was needed. He fell back against the door as though all the fight had simply evaporated out of him. He slid down against the fridge and when his ass hit the floor, he hit his head against the door heavily.
He turned his head to look at the offending piece of paper, his face almost completely blank.
“So, that's what he meant.” Dave said slowly, turning his gaze to the ceiling instead. He clutched at the small bottle in his hand tightly. He vaguely thought about how he should feel happy for his sister. She had actually managed to get a guy who could stand her for 24 hours a day.
Problem was she just had to fucking choose the guy Dave loved.
Like, fuck. This shit was as real as a shoujo manga. That he, of course, had never once picked up in his life. Never. Nope. Dave looked over edgily at his small bookcase before snapping his eyes back forward. That was a dark place in his life that he didn't really want to think about too much with all this shit happening.
Dave thought about all the things that had led up to this point. John and Rose had been a thing since fucking high school. But they were on and off so often that lately no one even blinked when they broke up, because there was basically no way that they weren't going to be back together in the next few weeks. (The shortest break up to date was, in fact, an hour, two minutes, and five seconds. No, Dave wasn't counting. That's ridiculous.) Some where between the break ups and make ups, Dave started realizing that maybe his feelings towards John were a fair bit more than strictly broship feelings. At first this was a very Big Deal. Sure, Dave had never had a girlfriend before, and sure, sometimes he whacked it to dudes fucking, but that didn't mean he was homosexual with a capitol H. It was a strictly artistic appreciation of said dudes fucking. He was an artist, after all.
He enjoyed the art of women fucking, too. Dave wasn't very discriminatory in his art forms.
But it wasn't until his wee little heart started going THUMP THUMP in response to seeing John's face, or receiving a text (EB: hey loser we're going out drinking to celebrate being hot ass bachelors.) that he began considering the fact that maybe he Wanted The Dick. When the Hot Ass Bachelors Drinking Extravaganza ended in sloppy makeouts in the passenger seat of John's shitty Honda, Dave realized that maybe he wanted a little bit more than The Dick.
Thus started the Secret Adventures of Male Exploration (That is When Rose Was Temporarily Out of The John Picture). John refused to cheat on her when they were together, and frankly, Dave wasn't very interested in being the girl on the side. Or guy in this case. But if he was being honest he kind of liked the imagery of he, John, and Rose on a film noir type poster. The image he favored the most was one of he and John macking it in a room with the door open, and Rose looking in with a look of shock and horror on her face. Dave would rather not mention the fact that he is always wearing a sexy strapless in these fantasies of his, but the narration doesn't give a shit about what Dave would prefer.
Sometime during all of this, Dave fell in love, John became confused, and Dave found out that Jade was tapping his sister's admittedly fine ass.
Needless to say, it was a confusing time in all of their lives.
But, it couldn't stay simple and okay forever. Around seven months after that first liplocking session in his car, John started asking Dave a lot of questions. What did this all mean? Was it wrong that he was in two fairly serious relationships on and off?
“What do you want, Dave?”
Dave never knew the answer. He was always so comfortable with the way that things were then and there. He would shrug and ruffle John's hair and change the subject, to John's annoyance.
“What do you want, Dave?”
Dave sighed and hit his head against the refrigerator once more.
- - - -
Jade Harley wasn't a very complicated person. All she really wanted from life was to be happy. Well, and a number of other things, too, but those were very secondary to happiness. As a result, dwelling on unhappiness wasn't really her style. But this was a little hard to ignore.
The pretty invitation printed on pale pink paper with unnecessary embellishments that screamed Roxy Lalonde sat on Jade's tiny card table that served as her work station and dinner table. It was just the right touch of complete fucking pigsty that was always present in a Harley household. Though, surprisingly, the table was basically the only place that was messy in her little one room apartment. When Jade graduated from high school, she left her Uncle Egbert's home and traveled around on her own, carrying her few possessions everywhere from Bangkok to Paris. While she was an orphan, her Grandfather left her a substantial inheritance that she spent solely on travel. She didn't like staying put, so this type of living space (a single mattress laying in the middle of the room with a crumpled sheet laying somewhat spread out over it, a desk lamp, her card table, and her clothes piled up in the corner) was very typical of her. Though, she had stayed here for much longer than she had originally planned.
She looked around the apartment sadly, until her eyes fell on a purple object on her sad kitchen counter. She padded over to it, bare feet crunching under something or other that she had forgotten to pick up. She picked the little thing up and turned it over in her hands. It was a old ring pop. Well, the ring part at least. The pop had been eaten by someone who really liked the color purple. She brought the little thing up to her lips and kissed it softly.
She had found an anchor.
She placed the plastic ring back down and turned away with a sigh. Unfortunately for her, her anchor was fairly attached herself. To her cousin. Yuck. Jade shook her head a little, and mentally chastised herself. She couldn't think like that!! She loved Rose, and she wanted Rose to be happier than she ever dreamed she could be. And, if that happiness was with John, well, then that's how it was. Would Jade give anything she had to make if be her? Absolutely. But the fact of the matter was that Rose had chosen John. The proof was in the pudding. Or, well, the fact that they were getting married. Jade thought with a fair amount of seriousness that marriage was indeed, Not Pudding.
She walked over and plopped down onto her mattress. It gave a sad squeal that showed it's age, but Jade ignored it. She grabbed up her laptop headset, shoved it on and laid back on her bed to casually surf the internet. Her Grandfather was not only very rich, but he got that way by designing incredible technology. While tech like the kind currently on her noggin was way past his time, his company, SkaiaNet, was still very much in business. And Jade happened to be the sort of CEO. As a result she got all the newest tech they put out for zip, nada, zero moolah. It was a pretty great perk of being a genius' Granddaughter.
Pesterchum chimed, and Jade frowned when she saw that it was Dave who was pestering her. Jade wondered why he was still trying to talk to her, when she didn't really want to talk to him, thank you very much!!! With a sigh she opened up the chat, and saw that it was actually just a continuation of what he was trying to bother her with befo--
“Oh.” Jade choked out. She read through the log, suddenly feeling like utter shit for giving Dave the cold shoulder. While it was true that by fucking it up with John, Rose was able to dump Jade like yesterday's shitty Chinese, it was also true that Dave kind of fucked it up with John. Meaning he kind of fucked up his own life, too.
Jade took a deep breath to calm herself. She was going to do this, Dave. She was really going to make this happen!
-- gardenGnostic [GG] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 11:46 –
GG: listen here strider
GG: lets get something straight right the fuck now!
GG: i dont hate you and i dont think i ever could!!! ok!!
GG: i guess thats a lie
GG: i seriously considered hating you for a minute there
GG: but give a girl a break i had just gotten dumped i kind of was hating on the world in general
GG: but like really dave
GG: i dont think im capable of hating you
GG: i kind of love you dork!!!!
TG: wow harley was that a confession
TG: but um all fuckery aside
TG: i love you too
GG: dave i hope you know were not going to make out just because rose and john are getting hitched now!!!
TG: well i wasnt really worried about that
TG: but now that were on the subject
TG: what the actual fuck are we going to do about that
GG: nothing i suppose!
TG: please note the fact that i used a fucking punctuation mark
TG: which means serious fucking business
TG: what the fuck do you mean were going to do nothing
GG: i mean were going to do nothing
TG: you cant be fucking serious
GG: cross my heart and hope to die!!!!
TG: jade seriously
TG: look at me in the text
TG: and tell me
TG: that you're okay with rose marrying john
GG: if that's what she wants then.....
-- turntechGodhead [TG] is typing --
-- turntechGodhead [TG] has ceased pestering gardenGnostic [GG] at 11:58 --
Jade sighed and pushed the headgear off without closing the pesterchum window. She could understand why Dave was upset. Hell, the selfish little Jade inside her head was upset with her. But she couldn't bear to be selfish in this instance. What if Rose didn't forgive her? Being her friend was at least better than....
Jade got up and retrieved the purple ring. She clutched it close to her chest, and ignored the tears falling without pause.
She laid down on her shitty tile floor and watched as her tears hit the floor. “I can't lose her...” She whispered to Dave, even though he couldn't hear. “I just can't. Even if we're just friends, even if I can never kiss her again. I can't lose her.” She hiccupped and for the moment forgot about her goal of happiness, and let herself be sad.
sorry for the fucking huge break. I didn't have a ton of inspiration, and I was a bit lost on how to approach this third chapter. I'm still not very satisfied with it, but it's done, and it needed to happen for the Big Finale or w/e. yep.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
The days leading up to October 25th brought hushed rumors of a rushed wedding, unplanned pregnancies, and runaway brothers. John Egbert didn't let any of these words touch him, instead gliding through the wait almost effortlessly. Rose Lalonde, on the other hand, was having a hard time not plucking the chattering masses' eyes out. The fact that anyone would think that she would get married just because she got pregnant was frankly insulting. If she was pregnant, that wouldn't be a problem, but she wouldn't force someone else to take responsibility! She was very capable of taking care of herself, and this hypothetical baby on the way.
But of course this was all entirely false.
Rose had been a little surprised that John had pushed for this date. The wedding being where it was, they would only be engaged for a little under a month. It made planning for it absolute HELL ON EARTH, as she had tried to tell him repeatedly, but he would hear none of it. She asked him why he wanted it to be so soon, but he skirted around the answer every single time, so she eventually just stopped asking. It's not like the date was causing her any problems; the sooner the better in all honesty.
Roxy had very literally screamed into her ear when Rose informed her about the engagement. She was a very excitable woman in general, but the buzz of the impending wedding had her going around like someone possessed. Rose scarcely had any time alone these days, between dress fittings and cake tastings and looking at venues for the reception (Roxy had immediately booked a church for the actual ceremony; Rose asked her if she had ever thought that Rose would want a say in the selection, and from then on the older woman made sure to inform her daughter of any choices from there on) (Rose loved the church her mother had chosen but she'd never admit that). Rose had to admit that it was vaguely impressing to see her mother running around like superwoman (or perhaps a madwoman would be more appropriate). It was reminiscent of the old days where Roxy would run around the house when she went through her spurts of cleaning. Sometimes the house was a pigsty (is a wizardsty was a thing, then that's what it would have been), and other times not a single speck of dust was allowed to exist inside it's walls. Rose would never admit it, but it was nice to spend time with her mom again.
There were a lot of things that Rose would never admit.
Roxy and Rose had an interesting relationship after the four kids and their friends had beaten Sburb. Rose had come to terms with her mother's death in the game, so when they entered the new universe she was very surprised, to say the least, to see her mother waiting for her, very much alive and well. It was so jarring. It was difficult to readjust to life how it was before they played the game. Nigh impossible, actually. Rose spent much of her teenaged years in her room, writing. Poetry, prose, guest comics for Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff, anything. She couldn't bear to be around the older Lalonde who, she had assumed, didn't remember the game. Why would she? But she did.
None of them were quite sure how it had happened, but the guardians from both the Alpha and Beta sessions reappeared, with some exceptions. Both Moms returned, both Bros, one Dad, and for a short time, both a Grandma and a Grandpa. Most of them were alternate versions of the kids themselves, which is, according to their theory, why they returned. But there was only one dad between John and Jane, which was a very sad affair. Dad only remembered Jane, no matter how many tales John recounted of them having prank wars together, or how he would always bake too many cakes, and how much John hated it. It was tough. Dad was a compassionate man, though, and took John in under his wing, and loved him just as much as he loved Jane. Soon they had developed their own relationship, and even though John still missed his Dad, he learned to love the new one he was given.
They all had had their own seperate problems with their revived guardians. Jade and Jake were very surprised to see theirs before them, but the group guessed that since they were both killed by things only introduced to their world through Sburb (Tavros and the Condesce), it made sense for them to be brought back. Grandpa didn't live for much longer, though. He died a year after the game ended, and Jade had a hard time with it. She went off and explored everywhere possible after high school. When Grandma died, Jake was very sad, but he simply fell back into the arms of his friends. Jade could have easily done the same, but she was a much... freer soul. Rose had always wanted to try and catch her, bring her back down to the ground, but was almost too afraid to disturb the delicate beauty that was her floating up in the sky, free. But that was another story altogether.
Rose had a hard time trusting her mom. She began calling her Roxy, and gently started creating a gap between the two of them. She didn't want to let her get close again. She was afraid of the pain that she felt when she lost her the first time; she couldn't handle that a second time. It was the slip of a stray comment that revealed Roxy remembered what had happened in Sburb that had woken Rose up. They never discussed it, but they were able to find comfort in their shared experiences. There was still something there that kept them from being totally close with each other, but that was more of a Lalonde thing rather than a Sburb thing.
They began talking more and more and Rose discovered that Roxy and Dirk (it drove him crazy that she called him that instead of Bro which is why she did) had actually been together before Rose and Dave had come down on their meteors. Roxy was back and forth between Texas and New York because of work, but after the meteors had come, she brought Rose down to Texas with her in a more permanent move. She and Dirk had thought it would be nice to raise the two babies together, like a family. But that necessarily wasn't the best move.
They broke it off, the Lalondes made their trek back up to New York and everyone moved on with their lives. And their lives took them to Washington after Sburb, as it did for the Harleys, Englishes, and Striders. Which brought them to that very current moment in a small room in Crocker/Egbert home, where Rose was in a simple wedding dress and Roxy was bustling around behind her.
It was October 25th and Rose was due at the church in an hour. The house was empty save for the two of them, everyone else getting into tuxes and various fancy wear or finalizing things at the church.
Roxy was chattering rapidly behind the bride to be, zipping up the back of her dress with not so sober hands. Rose wasn't really listening, but watching the bottom of her dress in the floor length mirror in front of her. She was getting married today. She was getting married to John Egbert. High school sweetheart, prankloving dork, and soul mate according to some aliens. She looked up and saw a beautiful woman in the mirror with delicate make up and a slightly curled blond bob. She knew it was her, but she was having a hard time connecting that bride with herself. She took a deep breath and tried to imagine John standing beside her in the mirror, in his tux. Just like they would be standing in approximately an hour. There was a little twinge in her heart when her mind put someone with longer hair there instead.
The image dispersed and suddenly Roxy was standing there instead, having popped up from her squatting position behind her. The grin was wide on her face as she almost reverently placed the veil (attached to a white satin headband) on top of her daughter's head. The image was so perfect. She was standing there, in full wedding gear, with her mother standing beside her looking like she was on the verge of tears. It made Rose smile softly at her mom's reflection.
“You look so beautiful, darling.” Roxy said without a single slur in her words, bringing a handkerchief up to dab at her eyes gently before the tears could ruin her makeup.
Rose laughed a little, looking away from the mirror. “You're supposed to say that. But I guess I have pretty good genes.” Roxy shook her head a little, a smile on her face. Her eyes finally caught the slight hesitation on Rose's face, though, and her expression dropped a little.
She brought her hand up and gently stroked her cheek. “Rose, is everything okay?”
Rose brought her hand up to rest atop her mothers for a moment before breaking away and walking across the room to sit on Jane's bed. Roxy followed, a sympathetic look on her face. “It's okay baby, prewedding jitters are perfectly normal.” She said while rubbing her back consolingly.
There was a long silence where Rose merely stared at her hands, and where Roxy stared at her back. Finally she let out a sigh and leaned back on her hands and stared at the ceiling instead. “You know, Dirk and I actually got married.” She said conversationally.
Rose sat up, surprise coloring her face. “Really? I thought you had just lived together.”
Roxy shook her head with a little smile. “Nope! We sealed the deal. It was actually before you and Dave came to us. But boy was that a mistake.”
“What, you didn't love him or something?” Rose asked increduously.
“No, no, I loved him. Hell, I still do!” Roxy smiled and laughed a little. “It was just a mistake for us to get married.”
Rose cocked an eyebrow at that. “...I'm not really following.”
Roxy brought a leg up on the bed and turned to face her daughter. “I love Dirk, Rose. That will never change. But our marriage only worked because we didn't live together. Once we did, I realized how fucking wrong the whole thing was. Just because you love someone doesn't mean that you'd be a good married couple. I realized that, he and I had a calm discussion and you and I left.” Roxy nodded matter-of-factly.
Rose smirked. “Calm discussion, huh? If I recall correctly, I think I remember Dirk telling me something about you throwing a hair dryer at his head.”
Roxy shrugged. “Okay so maybe his end of the conversation was more calm than mine. And maybe there wasn't really a conversation. The point is, we were totally and completely wrong for each other.”
“What about you and Dad?” Mr. Crocker insisted that everyone call him Dad and even if it was a little awkward at first, it came naturally now.
“Dad and I are a completely different story. I love him too, but we fit.” Roxy smiled widely. She glanced down at the watch on her wrist and started. “Shit, we've gotta hurry. Grab your shit, and meet me down at the car, okay?” She said, practically leaping off the bed and racing out the door.
Rose was starting to get up when Roxy peeked back into the room. “I'm not worried about you and John, honey. I think that you two will be wonderful together. That is, unless you have doubts about this whole thing.” She gave Rose a very knowing look and disappeared again.
She couldn't know, could she? Rose sighed and looked at herself in the mirror again. On second thought, she really wouldn't doubt it if Roxy knew about everything that was going on. The woman always seemed to know everything. It was kind of irritating, actually.
Rose grabbed up her bouquet from the dresser, and held it in front of her. She stared at herself for a long minute in the mirror before she heard Roxy calling to her from downstairs.
“IF YOU DON'T GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW EVERYONE WILL BLAME ME FOR YOU NOT BEING THERE IN TIME AND I DON'T WANT THAT SO YEAH. GET DOWN HERE.”
Rose rolled her eyes and walked out of the room, turning off the light before closing the door behind her softly.
She had a wedding to go to.
- - - -
Dave Strider had been missing for the weeks leading up to the wedding. Everyone was very worried, and had been looking for him whenever they weren't doing things to try and make the wedding absolutely perfect. A few people had suggested postponing the wedding until he returned, but it was decided that that wouldn't change anything. John had been oddly silent about the whole affair, but no one was too surprised. It was hard to lose your best friend like that.
say hello to the glory of rose in her wedding gown
and here's the Big Finale. thanks for reading my first fanfiction for the homestuck fandom! hope it was enjoyable.
The church looks beautiful, Jade couldn't help but think to herself as she walked up the steps. It was the perfect kind of church to get married in, the type that everyone dreams about. The kind people got married in in movies and books and tv. It wasn't surprising that Roxy picked it.
When Jade walked into the hall, she was greeted by friends and acquaintances and practically attacked by Dad. He held her for a long time, happy tears streaming down his face already. If this was what he was like BEFORE the ceremony, Jade was interested to see what he'd be like when John and Rose finally said “I do”.
Jade cringed a little but played it off when Dad asked her about it. She was given her chance to escape when Jake and Dirk (the Dirk that wasn't Dave's brother) walked through the door together, and Dad went to start his barrage of hugs and feelings over with them. She looked around, impressed with the minimal but wonderful decorating. There were flowers on the pews and yet even more flowers lining the aisle. John stood at the head of the aisle, talking happily with Jane. Jade wanted to go and talk with him, but something about his tux and the fact that he was getting married to Rose in about ten minutes kept her from doing so. She edged carefully into a pew near enough to the front that it was acceptable, but far enough back that she could feel like she wasn't going to jump up in the middle of the ceremony and punch John's lights out.
Which she totally hadn't fantasized about hundreds of times already. Of course not.
Okay maybe she had. But what of it? She was trying to be happy for Rose, but she made no promises for her stupid traitor of a cousin. “You have stupid teeth.” Jade whispered maliciously under her breath, glaring in John's direction. A woman sitting in front of her turned around, and offended look on her face.
“Oh, not you ma'am! Though I must say your teeth are quite stupid looking too!” Jade said sweetly. The woman glared at her and got up and moved to the pew on the other side of the aisle. Good riddance.
She looked around the hall, searching for a familiar mop of blond hair. She didn't find it and she was disappointed. Somehow she had thought that maybe Dave wouldn't leave her alone in this, that they could pat each other's backs and maybe wipe each other's tears. But, maybe that just wasn't going to happen. Dave was fairly sensitive after all, even if he didn't really want people saying that about him. Jade sighed and grabbed her phone from her little clutch purse.
-- gardenGnostic [GG] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 12:48 --
GG: where the fuck are you man????
GG: the wedding starts in like ten minutes!
GG: you cant seriously tell me that youre going to just NOT show up!!!
GG: or i guess you could
GG: BUT THAT IS TOTALLY LAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GG: if you come now i offer you a shoulder to cry on and lots of alcohol and angry movies with lots of killing tonight at your place with our names on it
GG: this is a limited time off though
GG: so you better get your ass here
-- GardenGnostic [GG] ceased pestering TurntechGodhead [TG] at 12: 51 --
Jade practically threw her phone back into her bag and crossed her arms in a huff. She leaned back in the pew and put her feet up on top of the pew in front of her, legs spread despite the fact she was wearing a dress. “He better come.” She muttered.
She needed him.
- - - -
“Who'd have ever thought that you'd actually be here?” Jane teased jokingly, hitting John on the arm in a way that probably was meant to be playful, but Jane wasn't really that excellent at pulling punches. He raised his hand and casually massaged where she hit him and laughed.
“It's pretty crazy isn't it?” He grinned toothily.
And it was. John looked around and almost couldn't believe it himself. He was getting married! Like, what?? Sure, John had thought about the whole thing, considered it as a thing that he might do in the future, but to actually be standing in the church he'd be getting married that same day was pretty insane!
“Jane, you're a girl right?”
“No.” Jane responded, her voice dripping with sarcasm. John waved her reply off and continued.
“So, you probably saw Rose's dress and stuff, right?”
“Who knows?” She said teasingly.
John pouted a little. “Aw, c'mon Janeeeeeeeey.” He said, obnoxiously stretching out her name like she only lets Roxy do. He stepped closer and hugged her tightly. “C'mon, tell me how pretty my bride to be is! Come on you know you waaaaant toooooooo.”
Jane pushed him off, scowling. “Like I'd tell you now. Guess you'll have to see for yourself!” She said, skipping away from him, her skirt bouncing along with her. John rolled his eyes, his grin wide. He looked around to see was here, and saw that basically the whole crowd was here. Jane had just gone over to Roxy and sat down next to her on a pew near the front. Jake and Dirk were still being barraged by Dad near the door. Bro was somewhere around, though John wasn't entirely where. That guy was really weird. The only missing parties were Mom and Rose (and, well, John knew where they were), Dave (who John really honestly didn't expect to be seeing at the wedding anyway), and Jade—though it looked like Jade had arrived without John noticing! John waved enthusiastically at her, but she ignored him. John lowered his hand slowly and frowned. What was her deal?
“Hurry, hurry everyone take your seats! She's coming!” Dad boomed out in excitement. John's heart skipped a beat as his eyes quickly became trained on the door. Everyone sat down in an excited flurry, and the chatting died down slowly as everyone waited.
The organ picked up the tune anyone could recognize, and John knew the moment had come.
The doors opened, and in came little Casey (John didn't question when she had arrived in their new world with them, he just was happy about it) carrying a little basket of petals. She stopped halfway down the aisle, and simply dumped the entire basket out right there, and stared at it for a moment before waddling over to the person sitting nearest to her, handed them the basket, and continued waddling down the aisle, eyes on John. He was laughing nigh uncontrollably the entire time, as were most of the crowd in the church.
But the second she appeared in the doorway, all laughter died down. John's eyes widened and his jaw dropped. “Holy shit.”
She was more beautiful than he could have ever imagined. John had always laughed at the groom's face when his bride finally appeared, but he was eating his laughter now. Rose Lalonde, the girl he'd been with since high school, the girl he saved the world with, was walking towards him in the most stunning dress he'd ever seen (probably solely because she was in it), coming to get married to him. She was walking with her arms linked with Mom and Dad, but her eyes were only on him.
They reached the head of the aisle, and Mom gave Rose a sloppy kiss on the cheek, already looking very teary. Dad kissed the top of her head, and patted her arm gently, before urging her forward and going to take care of his own wife. Rose continued her little journey by herself, coming to stand across from John. Their eyes never left each others, even as the minister started speaking.
None of them had ever really been that much into religion, seeing as they had become gods themselves (what was so good about this one god, huh?), but this whole set up was really nice. Though, the setting didn't really matter at that point to John.
He hardly heard most of the words coming out from the bulky man next to them, he just couldn't tear his eyes away from the girl in front of him. Staring at her, John couldn't help but notice how strong the resemblance between Rose and Dave was.
“If anyone knows of any reason why these two people should not be joined in marriage, please speak now or forever hold your peace.”
- - - -
After Dave had received the invitation in the mail, and after his conversation with Jade, he ran. He got into his car, and ran. He didn't stop driving until his car ran out of gas, and then he pushed it to the nearest gas station, filled up, and kept on going. He didn't stop until he reached the US/Mexico border and then he figured he probably had to stop. He stayed in southern California for about a week, and ignored any and all texts he got from back home. Rox tried to contact him, Bro, Dirk, Jade, hell, even Rose tried to get ahold of him.
Everyone except the one person who could have brought him back.
So he stayed and had some of the best fucking burritos he'd ever had, stared at the ocean, and time shenanigan'd his way into a free day at Disneyland. Which, he's totally ashamed of and would never do again. Ever. Totally.
A week until the wedding had him losing sleep and hair, the latter of which was completely unacceptable. Six days until the wedding had him wishing there was something he could do about this whole situation. Five days had him thinking that maybe he could do something about it. Four days had him in his car, driving home. He was going to cut it close, but if he drove fast enough....
October 25th found him searching frantically for the church, knowing what he had to say, and not really caring if it made a difference at this point.
He found the church at 11 o' clock, and waited, hiding inside the hall. If he could manage it, he'd prefer grabbing John before the actual ceremony started. Maybe he could avoid causing a fuss. But he couldn't summon the courage, and instead stood there like a useless fuck the entire time. When he got the texts from Jade, he looked over at her and silently apologized. He would go over there, but.... One look at John playing around with Jane, so fucking happy (like he had the fucking right to be happy what the fuck man) kept him firmly standing in his hiding spot.
Rose showed up and Dave cursed under his breath. Why did she have to be so fucking good looking? Maybe if she'd been ugly or something John wouldn't have kept on getting distracted by her. No, bad Dave he thought to himself feeling slightly ashamed about thinking that. But only slightly. While everyone was so distracted by Her Imperial Stealing Whorescion, Dave snuck out of his place and sat down on one of the empty pews in the back. There was a part of Dave that had hoped his moving would have caught John's attention, but the bastard's eyes were planted firmly on Rose.
Maybe... Maybe he shouldn't say anything. Rose was his sister after all. And, well, maybe if John would be happier with her....
Dave sat through the ceremony, becoming more and more numb as the minister went on. What was he even doing here? Why did he think that anything he said would make a difference?
Dave jolted up in his seat at the memory. Maybe it didn't make a difference. Maybe John chooses Rose. Maybe Dave will fuck everything up and his sister will hate him forever.
But John was still waiting for him to speak up.
“If anyone knows of any reason why these two people should not be joined in marriage, please speak now or forever hold your peace.”
The silence was only there for a moment before Dave shot up to his feet, and a shout peeled out of his throat. “Stop!”
There were a few gasps (the most notable one coming from Dad) and the sounds of people turning around in their seats rang throughout the room. All eyes were on Dave (the most notable pair being the bright blue ones at the front of the hall).
Dave could hear his heartbeat in his ears. He felt like he was on fire. Maybe he was. Couldn't you spontaneously combust if you concentrated hard enough? Dave shook the thoughts from his head and gripped the pew in front of him almost hard enough to splinter.
“John, I fucked up.” A few inhaled gasps from the curse-sensitive crowd, but Dave ignored them. “And, maybe I'm too late now. But I don't care. You can't do this. I didn't stop you when I had the chance, and I wouldn't blame you if you just ignored me. But I love you. I love you more than shitty humor. Hell, I love you more than I love shitty stock photos. And you know how much I love those.” Dave laughed a little and then shook his head. “I can't just stand by and watch you marry my sister. So, I guess I object. I object with the force of an elephant shitting it's way into space.”
Murmurs rose among the people in the hall, and the minister stood to the side, looking very confused. He obviously hadn't had this trope ever play out in his own church. (Though, it is very notable that were Dave in full control of his thoughts and emotions, he'd be very proud to be a player in this particular trope; cross that off his bucket list, butlerman.)
John was staring at Dave still, choked noises coming out of his throat. Rose was doing the same, though she was alternating between looking at Dave and John, and searching the hall for Jade.
The silence stretched out, and the longer it went, the more confused the space got.
“John.” Dave choked out, his emotions starting to catch up to him. “I need you.”
John's face did something weird there, something that an innocent bystander wouldn't understand.
But Rose did. Before she acted, though, she looked around the hall once more, and finally found her. Jade was looking straight at her, eyes wide, hope growing in them. That sealed the deal for Rose.
She reached out a hand, and put it on his arm. John whipped around to face her, his face making her heart do flips and tears come to her eyes. She choked back the tears, though, and put on a comforting face. “Go.”
John looked at her with a face that asked her if she was sure. It broke her heart, but she nodded.
There was someone who needed her, too.
John peeled away from the front of the church, running towards Dave. Dave ran out to the aisle and met him halfway. Dave held onto the boy in front of him like his life depended on it, and John did the same.
“Wanna blow this pop stand?” The blond asked the other almost breathlessly.
“Fuck yeah I do.” John laughed out, all smiles. He grabbed Dave's arm and ignored the looks and shouts from around them. When they reached the door, however, he turned around. He met Rose's gaze and really hoped that she knew how grateful he was. Then he tried to grab Dad's eyes, and gave him an apologetic look.
Then, the two men were gone.
Rose was standing alone at the front of the hall, looking out over the church with a little sad look on her face. It hurt, but she was okay. Her mom had had a point before. Rose loved John, but....
“Rose...?” Jade was making her way slowly towards the jilted bride.
Something inside her broke and she closed the gap between them and threw her arms around the other. The tears made their way past her blockade, and fell freely down her face. “I'm so sorry.” She repeated it over and over, as she shook in Jade's arms. Jade stroked her hair softly, telling her it was okay. Everything was okay.
Jade stepped back a little, holding both of Rose's hands. She looked her all over, just shaking her head and smiling.
Rose laughed shakily and looked down at herself. “What a shame to waste this beautiful dress.”
Jade brought both her hands up to her face, and kissed her deeply. “The dress is only beautiful because you're in it.”
Rose blushed deeply, and smiled and laughed again. “You really know how to charm a girl, don't you?”
An idea occurred to Jade, and once she thought of it, she knew Dave wouldn't forgive her if she didn't go through with it. That boy really loved his tropes.
“Hey, Rose?” She started with a little smile. Rose cocked her head to the side a little in response. “What if that dress didn't have to go to waste?”
Rose's eyes widened as she realized what Jade was implying, and it was painfully obvious that those in attendance were getting more and more confused as the situation went on. Jade turned to the minister, who looked simply floored by everything that was happening. “You have a problem with same sex marriage?”
The minister splutered in confusion. Jade's eyes narrowed threateningly, and the minister jumped in his place. “No! No, of course, I have no problems with that, n-none at all?” He finished almost in a question. Jade smiled.
“Good!” She turned to Rose. “Do you still want to get married today?”
Rose laughed heartily, and nodded through it. “Let's do it.”
“Oh, and I've got your ring!” Jade exclaimed in excitement, digging in her dresses' pocket, immediately finding the small prize. She brought out the old, purple ring pop ring that Rose had given to her so long ago. Rose smiled wide when she saw it and excitedly reached down the front of her dress and brought out an old, green ring pop ring. Jade let out a bark of laughter, and doubled over. “Seriously??”
“Hey! I always keep it on me and between my boobs was the only place I could keep it on this stupid dress, okay?” Rose said matter-of-factly, hitting Jade lightly.
Jade stood up straight, wiping the tears of laughter from her eyes. “Whatever you say, Rose.”
They exchanged the two rings again, and held the other's ring in their hands. They turned to the minister, who kicked the ceremony back into gear. They didn't have vows prepared so they just winged it, and suddenly the were at their “I do”s. They both agreed to take the other as their lawfully wedded wife in the crazy din that the church had become, and they were overjoyed the entire time.
Jade slid the green ring onto Rose's hand, and Rose slide the purple one onto Jade's.
They kissed for the first time as a married couple, and Mom was an absolute mess on the floor. Dad wasn't really sure what to do, and just crouched next to her, afraid to touch her and afraid to say anything.
“You go girl!” Came the sound of the younger Roxy, followed by the congratulating cheers of the other alpha session kids.
Rose and Jade just couldn't stop smiling and laughing and kissing. Jade looked at her new wife slyly. “Now, then. Let's go take that dress off, okay?”
“Took the words right out of my mouth.” The two ran out of the church together, cheers and thrown petals following them. The people who attended followed them outside until only the crying Mom, distressed Dad, the minister, and Casey were left.
“What just happened?” The minister asked, looking exhausted.
Casey blew a bubble in response.
- - - -
The following weeks found the newlyweds holed up in Rose's apartment on their “honeymoon”, John and Dave fucking around in southern California with no plans of returning any time soon, and Mom feeling very very proud (she had picked up that little trick from her years of being married to Dad).
No one had remembered to pick Casey up from the church. John would eventually remember her, and go to pick her up, but the minister had learned to really appreciate her company while he had it and would miss her dearly. This would lead him to getting a pet salamander, whom he would name Lacey.
It was very safe to say that everyone ended up living very, very happily ever after.