“Lucas Lee? You're dating Lucas Lee? But he's part of the League of Evil Exes.” Scott whined and flopped bonelessly into the recliner not taking his eyes off his ex-roommate. "How could you do that? He tried to beat me up.”
“Actually,” Wallace turned away from the stove, using the spatula in his hand as a pointer. “He did beat you up. If you hadn't tricked him into doing a grind down that snow covered railing Gideon would be dating Ramona and you'd be in the hospital in traction, but that's all in past. Forgive and forget I always say.”
“I hate you.” Scott sunk down lower in the chair and sighed. “Why did you even tell me? And since when do you say that? You're the bitter, grudge holding one.”
“As does everyone who isn't have sex with Lucas Lee and I'm saying it now so that is what counts.” Wallace smirked serenely and came out from the kitchen carrying a plate of bacon. He was dressed only in a dark blue button down shirt and a pair of plaid boxers despite the chill that still hung in the air. He leaned back against the breakfast bar and studied Scott. “Lucas and I are coming to the show tonight so I thought I would do the right thing and tell you before hand.”
“What about other Scott and Jimmy?” Scott levered himself up out of the chair and came over to steal a piece of bacon from Wallace's plate.
“They'll be there too.” Wallace raised his hand to smack Scott's, but stopped himself. Since Scott no longer lived there that technically made him a guest and Wallace had better manners than to smack his company. Even if he really, really wanted to.
“Wait.” Scott took a bite, chewed, and swallowed before pointing what remained of the bacon at Wallace. “You have three boyfriends now? How does that even work?”
Wallace shrugged, smirking a little. “I told you, I didn't write the rule book.”
“No, seriously, how do you even...?” Scott made a few gestures with his hands, his bacon flopping around in a sad and vaguely obscene way.
“I could draw you a picture.” Wallace's smirk widened taking on an evil edge to it. “Or a diagram that shows how everything fits together.” He picked up a piece of bacon and nibbled on the end watching as Scott's horrified expression grew along with his comprehension.
“No, no. That's okay. I'd rather not think about it.” Scott finished his piece of bacon and grabbed a second one before returning to the chair. “I thought Lucas Lee liked girls. He dated Ramona and he likes to show off for them. That's why he did the grindie thingie on the rail. Because I told him that girls were watching.”
“It was ninth grade. People change.” Wallace looked pointedly at Scott then sighed. “Most people anyway. Besides, a lot of his fans are women and he doesn't like disappointing them.”
“Oh.” Scott frowned, looking surprisingly thoughtful and serious. “I guess that makes sense. I mean if I served coffee for a living I wouldn't want people knowing that I liked to drink tea. Though I do like Sleepytime when Ramona makes it. She puts something special in it that makes it taste really good.”
“Water?” Wallace's voice was as dry as an unmoistened tea bag filled with freeze dried and concentrated sarcasm.
“Yes! No. It's something more than that.” Scott sighed and waved a hand vaguely in Wallace's direction. “Maybe sugar or flavoring or something.”
“Maybe she just has really good water. Does she filter it?” Wallace's voice held mild interest though his amusement was visible in the slight upward curve of his lips. He picked up his now empty plate and carried it into the kitchen. After rinsing it off he set it in the sink to wash and put away later.
“You're making fun.” There was a pout in Scott's words and on his lips giving him the look of a recently botoxed actress.
“Just a little, big guy.” The affection was clear in Wallace's voice this time. For reasons beyond his understanding Wallace continued to harbor a surprisingly large amount of warmth for Scott. Even if his life was an ongoing clusterfuck of weirdness. It wasn't like Wallace's was completely normal either. After all he was juggling three boyfriends one of whom was a Hollywood A lister.
Scott smiled and relaxed back into the chair, some of the sulkiness melting away. “Lucas Lee. Lucas Lee. You're really dating him? That's so weird.”
“Yes, I'm really dating him and why is it weird? I stalked him around Toronto and it turns out he likes that. He likes to be appreciated as an actor and a man.” Wallace licked his lips, his eyes going unfocused and slightly glazed. “What a hell of a man he is. Seriously, his pictures don't even begin to do him justice.”
“La La La La La.” Scott covered his ears and chanted in a loud sing song voice. “I don't need to know that.”
Wallace snorted and shook his head. “I have pictures. Would you rather see those? Lucas loves the camera and it loves him just as much. He knows how to pose.” Wallace pushed away from the counter and crossed the room to where his phone was lying in the middle of the unmade bed. “I promise not to show you any of his junk. I know how you hate that.”
Issuing a squeak that sounded rather like a squirrel or other small rodent in distress Scott shoved himself back into a corner of the chair and raised a hand in a defensive posture. “No, that's okay, really. I'll just take your word for it. Lucas Lee is the man.” He made a weak fist pump before dropping his hand to rest over his face. “He's not going to try to kick my ass tonight is he? Just so I know.”
“No. I talked to him about it and he promised to behave. Besides you defeated Gideon and destroyed the League of Evil Exes so it's all over and done with. You got the girl and Lucas no longer has to worry about trying to help control the future of Ramona's love life. He's moved onto drama and math of a completely different kind.”
“That's okay then I guess.” Scott rose slowly from the chair and moved to stand next to Wallace. “If you're happy.”
Wallace smiled, his guards and sarcasm set aside for a brief moment. “I am. I really am.”