Work Header

The new best closer in the office

Work Text:

“Has he eaten anything yet?” Mike asked as soon as Donna’s area came into sight.

“No.” Donna shook her head with a worried face. “He wouldn’t eat his usual favorites. He didn’t even glance at the caviar or at Jacques' croissants.”

“Jacques' croissants?” Mike gasped. “This is far worse than I thought then.” If he hadn’t known any better, he would have thought that his boyfriend was madly in love with the French baker. The fact that his boss wasn’t willing to eat the best croissants in the country proved that he had no appetite whatsoever.

The problem was that Harvey had a slight cold but he couldn’t take cold medicine with an empty stomach. At lunch, he had opted to take a nap in his office instead of having a meal with Jessica, so the managing partner had summoned Mike and had ordered him to make the problem go away.

“I didn’t think he could become a bigger baby. It’s not like he’s dying.” Donna rolled her eyes. Mike might have never seen this side of Harvey but she had seen it more than enough times and it seemed to get worse every year. The cold wasn’t even that bad; he just had a mild headache and a bit of fever. Even taking his temperature had been an ordeal. Harvey had fussed about how he didn’t like a thermometer stuck in his ear but she had ignored him and shoved it in anyway.

“Let me try something. I have an idea. It has the potential to end me but I guess his health comes first.” They had a big trial tomorrow and Mike couldn’t afford a feverish Harvey annoying the judge or an angry Jessica hunting him down. If his plan didn’t work, he would have to run anyway.

“Be careful. And, good luck.” Donna wished him with all her heart.

Mike held up his fist to knock before he remembered how Harvey had scolded him for pounding on his head this morning. He had joked that he would rather pound on something else of his but the senior partner hadn’t been in the mood to joke back. So Mike let out a small cough and asked permission to enter with his eyes. He hoped that they were shining beautifully as so many people used to tell him.

When he got a small nod from the giant baby, Mike carefully went inside, doing his best not to make a sound with his steps. Then he sat in front of Harvey’s desk and started to speak gently. “Guess what, Harvey. Rachel took me to this amazing restaurant for lunch and they had these exquisite pieces of art made of fruit.”

Mike looked down at the pineapple inside the container. It looked like a flower but it didn’t exactly look like a piece of art. But he had to sell it and get it past those pouty lips so he speared the slice of pineapple with the fork and held it up. “Beautiful, isn’t it?”

“Good for you.” Harvey didn’t bother about the pineapple and went back to reading his case file.

“No, it’s good for you. See, I brought these pieces of art for you. Come on, try this baby.” Mike leaned closer to the desk and held out the fork.

“I don’t wanna.” Harvey kept his eyes on the file.

“Ah, you’re probably interested in learning about this pretty pineapple’s background before you eat it. You always knew how to appreciate someone’s history. Well, this pineapple was growing on a plantation on Lanai just yesterday. And, today he’s with us in New York. How awesome is that!”

Harvey glared at his associate who clearly didn’t know how to keep his voice down.

“Sorry. I’ll be quiet if you’d just give this islander a chance. Please?”

“I said I don’t wanna.”

Mike twirled the fork in front of Harvey to catch his attention. “I know it’s got a rough exterior but it’s all sweet on the inside. I promise.” Then he impersonated a talking pineapple. “Come on. I love you, Harvey. I’ll be a good boy for you.”

Harvey slowly focused his eyes on his boyfriend. The cold must have affected his hearing too. “What did you just say?”

“Oh, that wasn’t me. That was the pineapple speaking. You didn’t notice how my voice was a little different when I said that? Wow, your cold really is worse than I thought.” Mike blushed at the intense gaze that he was receiving. He had meant to wait until they were exactly on the same page but it did feel great to get it off his chest.

Harvey tried to think with his head-splitting headache. Mike had just told him that he loved him. They had only been going out together for a couple of months. Wasn’t it too early to exchange words like that? He wasn’t willing to say it back yet but it seemed like the least he could do was eat the damn pineapple. So he took the fork and gave it a try.

“See? Not bad, huh?”

“Spectacular.” The pineapple actually wasn’t, but Mike’s happy smile was.

“I have more fruit in here with spectacular background stories.” Mike pointed at the transparent container. “Can I stay and tell them to you?” One bite wasn’t good enough to take pills.

Harvey thought about it. He really hated to think when he felt like he had a brain tumor. “Can you speak quietly?” The only thing that could make him feel a tiny bit better was Mike.

“Yes, yes! I promise.” Mike closed his mouth shut and gave Harvey his sorriest eyes. He had gotten too excited for a split second.

Since he was too tired to think whether to forgive Mike or not, Harvey begrudgingly gave him a nod. “I hope all those fruits love me.” He added as an afterthought.

Mike smiled as he nodded fiercely. “Of course they do. Everyone loves you.”

“You’re damn right. Especially you.”

“Yeah, especially me.” Mike agreed as he finished the pineapple that shared his feelings for Harvey. He was delighted that his boyfriend was so receptive. He had thought that Harvey would ignore him at best. But then all babies needed reassurance that they were loved, didn’t they?

Mike congratulated himself as he proceeded to put his fork into a slice of peach. “Now, I’d like you to meet this peach that has crossed the ocean to meet the man he loves.”

He knew that he sounded absolutely ridiculous but it didn’t matter. Harvey was grinning like a kid who was ready for a good story and he was more than happy to tell him just how much he cared about him.