Work Text:
Pam
This year I decided to dress up as cat for Halloween. Yes, that was also my costume last year, and the year before. It will probably be my costume next year too. I’m still on the Party Planning Committee. This year Angela decided that she wasn’t going to have anything to do with the Halloween Party. Apparently this year it really bothers her that it’s the devil’s day. The committee is just Phyllis, Ryan and me now. Planning took about 5 minutes. Last year it took up the better part of a day. Last year Michael had to fire someone on Halloween. He spent the whole day trying to get someone else to decide who. He ended up choosing Creed… Yep, Creed’s still here.
Phyllis
Bob has a party at work tonight. We’re going as refrigerators. I’m going to be a Kenmore and he’s going to be a Whirlpool.
Ryan
I’m supposed to be the Big Bad Wolf. Kelly picked out the costume. She’s Little Red Riding Hood. It’s um, one of those couple costumes. Yeah. I’m fucked.
Angela
Halloween is the celebration of Satan worshippers. I think it’s disgusting that our society so blindly goes along with such an amoral tradition. But what else could you expect from people so ridden with sin.
Michael
I really love Halloween. It’s a time for everyone to let loose, have a little fun. Last year, Jan made me fire someone on Halloween and I really feel like that put damper on the whole day. That’s why this year’s party as to be super special. We have a great Party Planning Committee though, and they’re working hard on it. So I’m pretty psyched about the whole thing. Plus Kelly’s wearing this really cute little skirt as Little Red Riding Hood… another interesting interpretation of a traditional story. I suggested she could have been Parvati Patil… the Indian girl from the Harry Potter books. She didn’t really seem to get it though. Not everyone appreciates my wit.
Stanley
Tonight I am going to drive around at about 2 miles per hour. I’ll be trailing my daughter to make sure she doesn’t get herself into any trouble. Halloween is a dangerous night for young girls.
Jim
I came to work this morning and I was the only one with a costume on. Apparently the Stamford branch doesn’t celebrate Halloween… It’s cool though. Looking like an idiot it actually one of my favorite pastimes.
Andy
Big Tuna came to work dressed up in this ridiculous costume. Seriously, is he a five year old? Nobody can expect to be taken seriously when they are wearing big white gloves and a fat suit that makes it impossible to sit in your chair right.
Josh
Jim Halpert has just the kind of energetic personality that really revitalizes an office. Some people mistake his enthusiasm for childishness, but I like to think I understand and value the valuable contribution he makes to this company.
Karen
Jim came to work today dressed up as an m&m. What’s the point of Halloween costumes once you’re too old to go trick or treating? No. I have no idea where all the chairs without arms have gotten to. Why?
Dwight
The Schrutes have a long-standing All Hallow’s Eve tradition of tricks. Last year I convinced my cousin Mose that his mother had come back from the dead. This year I have a special trick for Angela. It’s sort of a welcoming ritual. Women like that sort of thing.
Pam
After work? I plan to go home and get into my pajamas. I have a bag of candy but I don’t really live in a neighborhood with a lot of kids so I’ll probably just end up eating it all myself.
Roy
I know Pam really likes Halloween so I’ve been thinking about dressing up like an astronaut and stopping by her place tonight. It’s sort of a reference to when we were first dating back in high school.
Michael
This evening I am accompanying Carol to the haunted house at her kids’ school. Carol’s working the apple cider table and I offered to come along because that’s the kind of guy I am. Children are very important to me and I think it’s nice that I can be there tonight. I think it shows a sign of commitment. Sometimes it seems like Carol might be a little more invested in me than I am in her, but I try and make sure she doesn’t feel too awkward about it.
Toby
My ex-wife has Sasha tonight. Technically it’s my week but she really wanted to go trick or treating with her so I said it was okay. Maybe next year.
Kelly
Doesn’t Ryan look adorable in his Big Bad Wolf costume? He totally let me pick it out for him. I think we’ve really reached a new level in our relationship. I saw the costumes in this cute little store and I just KNEW that it would be perfect for us. Just like we are like PERFECT for each other.
Ryan
Run. I need to run.