Misha calls Jensen as soon as he’s finished. “Did you read the script yet?”
“Yeah, just did. I mean, really?” Jensen’s voice sounds weird through the speaker. A bit too high-pitched, maybe. Nothing like Dean.
“Well, it makes sense in the context,” Misha offers.
“Think we can do it?”
Eight days later, when it’s time to film the episode, Misha isn’t so sure anymore. He’s standing in a forest, only clad in Cas’ mental-patient-outfit complete with the trench coat, and it’s night. Which isn’t the warmest place to be in the middle of October, least in Canada of all the places.
They’re filming a flashback episode of Cas and Dean locked in purgatory. It’s the episode where Sam finds out what happened to them.
Jensen sighs heavily beside him.
When Misha looks over to him, their eyes meet immediately. Misha can’t help but frown. Luckily, Jared isn’t on set today. This scene will be difficult enough to shoot without someone pulling his pants down off camera.
“You okay?” Jensen asks him.
“Yes,” Misha nods absent-mindedly. “Yes, definitely. C’mon, let’s do this.” Those last words are rolling deep and rough from his lips, in his Castiel voice.
“Alright,” Jensen answers, and he sounds like Dean in that very moment.
They’re professionals, they can do this.
“Okay!” Bob Singer shouts over the set. “Let’s get ready for the gayest scene ever filmed for Supernatural!” A few chuckles from the crew ease up the tension, but it doesn’t quite reach Jensen and Misha. They’re already too far into their respective character’s headspace.
They sit down at the campfire side by side.
“Marker!” Bob yells. “Aaand action!”
Jensen takes one last deep breath and slips completely into his familiar second skin that is Dean Winchester.
“I’m sorry, Dean,” Castiel says from beside him.
Dean doesn’t look at him when he answers. “Don’t. We’ve been over this,” he tries to sound harsh, but it comes out softer than he intended. Dean is weary at this point. He just wants to go home. But, as for now, this is where they have to live and survive. Not that you could die in purgatory, you’d just be brought back - what sense would locking monsters in purgatory for punishment have if they died as soon as they arrived? - but according to the story, Cas was pretty near to death today and Dean is still freaked. “Just… don’t ever do this to me again, okay?”
“I overestimated my remaining powers,” Castiel replies and seems to guiltily curl in on himself. “It won’t happen again.”
“I… Cas, I just need you to understand. You’re all that I have left. Don’t make me loose you too,” Dean frowns now, anger and fear both in his tone.
“You won’t.” And with that, Castiel leans into Dean’s side. Reflexively, Dean’s arm curls around Cas’ shoulders, holding him close.
“Good,” he says, and it comes out as a broken whisper.
Cas looks up at him then, blue eyes staring into Dean’s, and Jensen realizes it just then. All the emotions that have tortured Dean, all the stuff he kept hidden and shoved away as far as possible, as long as he possibly could. But right there, in this very moment, when Dean looks down at Cas, his Cas, the only person he has left in the whole damn world - or purgatory for that matter - he knows his angel means more to him than just a good friend. More than a best friend.
It’s not in the script, but Dean smiles as he leans down. Because he’s in the darkest, most dangerous place he’s ever been in and just found his last straw of happiness. Because it’s taken him long enough to find it.
Dean still smiles when he captures Cas’ lips in a soft, endearing kiss. It’s just a second or two, and then they both pull back to look into each other’s eyes, their lips lingering just a moment longer on each other’s.
The moment is broken by Bob’s enthusiastic “Cut!” and the clap of the slate.
Jensen blinks - once, twice. Misha grins at him and leans back from their embrace.
“That was fantastic, guys! Perfect even! I think we got it, let me just take a look at the footage!” Bob compliments them and takes off to the camera team.
“What happened?” Misha asks him quietly.
“Dean just realized that he loves Cas,” Jensen says, and can’t hold back the grin spreading on his lips.