Work Header

20 Random Facts about Luna Lovegood

Work Text:

1. Many of the nonexistent creatures she talks about are part of an elaborate personal code. "Nargles," for example, is her code word for a particular type of sadness--which is often present in holiday gatherings (" often infested with Nargles") and can sometimes be driven away by a small, emotionally-meaningful charm.

2. She firmly believes that her true love will recognize the code and start using it back at her. She despairs that the fact that nobody seems to be catching on means that she's destined to spend her life alone.

3. She worries, sometimes, that she's started believing the code refers to real creatures. She's much more concerned about this than she is that her classmates think she's crazy.

4. Wrackspurts are nostalgic memories. But only the painfully distracting ones. Happy ones are Skitterblims.

5. She has not told her father about the code. She convinced him to call his device a "Wrackspurt Siphon" soon after her mother died; he's long forgotten what strange explanation she came up with. Besides, her father is much more prone to believing in nonexistent creatures than she is.

6. Wizarding photos of Luna never show her hands; she's always tucking them behind something or reaching outside the frame. Even she's not sure why.

7. She has a small scar above her right clavicle that's visible when she wears scoop-neckline clothes. She claims she got it from a Throckilone bite during a visit to the Headmaster.

8. She once walked in on Alecto and Amycus Carrow having sex against the wall in an empty classroom. She watched them for several minutes. She refers to the incident as a "vertigious vestipede."

9. She thinks Snape was starting to understand her code. More than once, she was sent to his office for "disciplining;" and they had long talks about Nargles and Wrackspurts. (At least, she thinks that's what they talked about. Snape's contributions to the discussions were a bit oblique.)

10. Several times, she prevented Amycus from raping a student by dropping hints to Alecto. She only had to ask Alecto for advice "because the other Professor Carrow is supervising a private detention" to have Alecto go storming off to find her brother.

11. Luna's first time was with Neville. She thought he was very sweet. Her second time was with Ginny. She, too, was very sweet. Her third time was with Draco, and that was her first orgasm with another person.

12. Her threesome with Snape and Draco is her fondest memory from that year at Hogwarts.

13. She knows more warming, drying, cleaning and sorting spells than anyone else at Hogwarts. She 's had to learn them just to stay presentable; she regularly gets splashed with water or muck, or has her possessions dumped into rubbish heaps, soup pots, or bins of broken glass.

14. She doesn't resent the way the other kids treat her. She does sometimes wish they'd direct that creativity into something that actually matters to them. (She convinced them how to use the Invisible Pinch charm to distract Death Eaters at crucial moments. Her next two months were relatively pinch-free.)

15. She delights in introducing Muggleborn first-years to small, relatively harmless magical creatures. She led several explorations to show them ice lizards, flower fairies, jackalopes and mousalopes, and Twist-Legged Spidrettes. She also led them on explorations to find Wintheling Shadowcrawlers and sneaking beables, which nobody but Luna could see.

16. She doesn't trust anyone wearing purple trim on robes of a different color. She doesn't know why. She knows it's irrational, and she's annoyed that the mistrust has been accurate several times.

17. She keeps a journal written in her special code. It's been grabbed and shared around the school several times; the other students think it's hilarious that she thinks "the Astronomy tower is infested with vestipedes" and "Centaurs are immune to Nargle bites" and "Seven minkletreks flitted around Muggle Studies today, but most students ignored them" and "Moon-Flittering Hoppers can summon Quivering Throckilones when confined in a classroom."

18. Minkletreks are torture. Throckilones are orgasms.

19. She intends to "translate" her journal and write a history of Voldemort's final year… after she finds her destined mate.

20. In her father's scrapbook, there's a very old Daily Prophet article about Luna's mother being admitted to St. Mungo's Spell Damage Ward, from which she never returned. It shows an irate mediwitch (wearing a blue robe with purple trim) holding Luna's wrists to keep her still