Cas can always tell, just by the look on Dean's face. He doesn't need to shove his way into Dean's head, and Dean doesn't like that anyway. The ride back to the bunker is quiet; the sound of the road under the Impala's tires, the honk of a horn as someone cuts off someone else on the highway, the crickets chirping as they pull up outside the bunker.
Dean heads straight inside, and Cas follows him, leaving Sam to make his way in and take care of the weapons like he said he was going to. By the time Cas gets to Dean's bedroom, Dean's already kneeling on the floor, arms behind his back, knees spread, head slightly bowed. He's still in his jeans, shirts, socks, and boots, but the jacket is draped over the chair in the corner.
Cas can see the tension in Dean's body, the tight shoulders, the furrowed brow of someone who doesn't like what they just had to do, but they knew it was necessary. Dean carries those weights, and this is the healthiest way they've come up with for lifting them off his shoulders.
Dean licks his lips as Cas closes the door. His eyes track Cas, watching as Cas takes his coat off, his tie, kicks off his shoes, and rolls up his sleeves. The belt comes off too because the buckle leaving a mark on Dean's leg once had been the first and last time Cas had worn it while they were playing.
"What do you want?" Cas asks. Of course he knows, but it's all part of the game, part of what pulls Dean out of the headspace he puts himself in after rough hunts.
Dean doesn't answer, so Cas makes a slight adjustment in his plans. It isn't every time that Dean gets like this. There are times they play in their regular sex life, and there are times they use it as stress relief, both mild and severe. Dean having resorted to keeping his mouth shut means a little more severe.
"Look at me," Cas says, standing in front of Dean.
Dean obeys, and Cas can see the anger in those beautiful green eyes, the pain. There's also defiance and a challenge. That's okay. Cas doesn't have a problem with that.
"Tell me what you want or I'm going to start with your least favorite and work my way up," Cas threatens.
Dean looks down at the floor again. "Don't," he says softly, teeth clenched.
"Then tell me what you want," Cas says. Dean hates puppy role play, and Cas has a butt plug with an adorable little tail waiting in their toy box that he can pull out if Dean doesn't answer.
Dean meets his eyes again, a little less defiance, but the pain is still there. "I want to feel... you."
It's halting and it seems as if Dean is forcing it out, but Cas knows exactly what he means, and he smiles as Dean gasps, eyes fluttering closed as his body jerks. Cas stands back, his grace flowing over Dean, wrapping around his wrists, his ankles, his cock, holding him right where Cas wants him, and Dean's cock is already responding.
"Yeah," Dean whispers.
Dean's life has never been full of control, and he's scrabbled for what little he could get, but when Cas walked in and turned his life upside down, Dean found a creature capable of controlling every single aspect of him, who was larger than the room they were in, stronger than Dean could imagine, and Dean was comforted by the fact that all the strength, all the grace Cas had could be used to hold him down, treat him roughly or with tender care, and all the while Dean could relax because Cas loved him and would never damage him. Dean could let go.
Cas crouches in front of Dean and lifts his chin with a finger. "Stinging or thudding?" he asks, because he always gives Dean choices. Dean doesn't get many of those, but Cas is different.
"Thud," Dean says, and Cas nods, his fingers running over Dean's neck as he stands and walks to their closet.
Cas pulls out Dean's favorite flogger. It doesn't give the same thud that a paddle does, but Dean loves it, and Cas feels like watching Dean writhe with pleasure. By the time he turns back around, he's stretched Dean out, standing in the middle of the room, spread eagle with only Cas' grace holding him there.
Dean's panting, mouth open as Cas walks around to the front of him. He lets Dean see the flogger, running the tips of the suede over his own hand and fingers, Dean's eyes tracking the movement of the falls as they gracefully move.
"I'm going to start with five," Cas says, then waits for Dean to nod before walking around behind Dean. He unbuttons and unzips the jeans and pulls both the jeans and underwear down to Dean's ankles.
A gentle flick of the flogger teases Dean's ass, making the shirt tail flutter. The next swing is aimed between Dean's legs, keeping it far enough back that it tickles the crack of his ass, his inner thighs, and just barely touches his balls.
Dean lets out a groan, body already relaxing, so Cas flicks again, this time over Dean's left ass cheek, then his right before once more going between his legs.
"Five more, heavier," Cas says. He always works in groups of five, always tells Dean exactly what he's doing. Not only is it part of the game, but it makes for a calmer Dean, because he always knows what to expect, is never scared of Cas or jumpy.
Cas pulls his arm back, then uses a little more strength, coming down on the crease between Dean's right ass cheek and his thigh, letting the falls wrap around the side of his leg. He isn't moving fast enough to hurt, just enough to sensitize the skin. He repeats with Dean's left side, back to his right, then his left again before finishing the set with the same strength across both ass cheeks.
Dean's breathing has calmed down. He isn't panting. He's obviously aroused and excited, but he's already settled in for the play time.
"How many sets have I done so far?" Cas asks.
"Two," Dean replies.
Keeping Dean out of subspace for as long as possible is Cas' goal. Most people want to reach it as quickly as possible, and Dean had fought him on it the first few times, but when he realized Cas wasn't going to budge on it, he went with the flow and loved it. Everything was more intense, and when he finally released everything and just let Cas take over, when Cas let him come, that was his high, and he'd stay there for a long time, shoved in so hard and so fast that it was like nothing Dean had experienced before.
"Five more, heavier, underhanded," Cas says.
"Okay," Dean says, nodding.
Cas pulls back, then brings his hand up more quickly than he had the other times, hitting the back of Dean's right thigh. Dean's breathing hitches, and as Cas brings the flogger up and hits the back of his left thigh, Dean whimpers. It isn't because of the pain. It doesn't even really hurt yet. It's because Dean is enjoying himself, slowly letting go of the day.
The right thigh is hit again, then the left before Cas hits both of Dean's ass cheeks with the last stroke. Dean doesn't flinch when Cas wraps his arms around him from behind and kisses his right shoulder through the shirts. Cas pulls the falls over Dean's cock while running his left hand up under his shirt, across his belly.
"Are you hard for me?" Cas asks.
"Yes," Dean says, voice a little breathy.
Cas can't praise him yet. Dean won't accept it until he'd relaxed more, so Cas kisses him again and pulls back. "Five more, and I'm going to make it sting."
"Okay," Dean says.
Dean's right outer thigh takes the first stroke, but instead of flinching, Dean's body relaxes just a little more. The stroke on his left outer thigh has him whimpering again. Cas keeps the same pace, the same amount of time between strokes, and the third hit lands across both ass cheeks.
"Cas," Dean moans.
"Yes, Dean?" Cas says, smiling because Dean can't see him. He brings the flogger down again on Dean's ass.
"Need more," Dean says.
"We'll get there," Cas says, trailing the handle over the crack of Dean's ass. "How many sets have I used on you so far?"
"Four," Dean says.
"Five more strokes, and these will hurt," Cas says.
Dean doesn't brace himself. He lets Cas hold him up with his grace, trusting Cas to be there for him. The first strike is over Dean's right ass cheek, the falls wrapping and stinging his outer hip. Dean hisses, but doesn't flinch away, and Cas hears another hiss as he does the same to Dean's left ass cheek. Two more strikes over the meaty part of Dean's ass, a gasp out of Dean each time, and then Cas is running his hand gently over Dean's ass cheeks.
"How many sets?" Cas asks.
"Five," Dean says.
"Good boy," Cas says.
Dean tenses a little, but he doesn't say anything about it, so they're getting closer to that place Cas is taking them.
"Five more, medium, on your back," Cas says as he makes Dean's shirts disappear.
Dean squirms a little, but doesn't try to get away. Cas raises the flogger, then snaps across Dean's right upper back, his left, his right, his left, then hit the middle. He wraps his arms around Dean from behind again, kissing his bare shoulder and letting the falls graze Dean's cock.
"One more set with the flogger," Cas says. "I'm going to spread your legs. I want you to feel it everywhere."
"Okay," Dean says, preparing himself, but not scared.
Cas pulls with his grace, spreading Dean's legs more, then steps back. He brings the flogger down on Dean's left inner thigh, letting the tips barely touch Dean's balls. Dean hisses, but Cas is already moving, coming around Dean's front and catching him across the chest. Dean winces, keeping his chin raised high so Cas doesn't accidentally hit his face with the falls, then Cas walks around and lands a stroke on Dean's left outer thigh.
"Ah," Dean whimpers, cringing a little at the pain.
Cas walks around behind him and brings the flogger down over Dean's right inner thigh, again barely touching his balls with the tips of the falls, but there is more force in the stroke. Dean goes up on his toes, gasping. The final stroke comes down on both ass cheeks, and Dean lets out another gasp.
"Good boy," Cas says, a gentle hand trailing over Dean's pink ass cheeks. "Is there anything else you want?"
Dean nods, and Cas runs the tips of his fingers over Dean's back, his sides, and walks around to the front of Dean, wrapping his fingers around Dean's cock.
"Tell me," Cas says.
Dean's looking at the floor, which means he isn't quite ready yet. "More," he says.
"More what?" Cas says, keeping his voice soft, keeping the mood of the room level.
"Just...," Dean says, then shakes his head.
Cas kisses his shoulder again. Dean needs time to let go of everything, and if he isn't ready yet, that's okay. Cas tosses the flogger onto the dresser and walks up to Dean, trailing his index finger over Dean's chest, down to his belly, around the soft skin, and finally wraps his hand around Dean's balls.
That gets Dean's attention, and he lifts his chin to look Cas in the eye. "I'm paying attention," Dean says, worried but not scared.
"I want your full attention," Cas says, gently squeezing. "You're here with me."
"I know," Dean says, nodding. "Sorry."
"It's okay," Cas says, giving Dean a small smile. "You're being very good for me."
Dean nods. "Okay."
Cas wraps his left hand around Dean's cock, thumb just under the head, massaging the bundle of nerves. Dean's mouth opens slightly, eyelids drooping some.
"I'm going to squeeze, and you're going to stay still for me," Cas says.
Dean nods. "Okay, Cas," he says.
Cas squeezes, not hard enough to bruise, but enough to make Dean freeze, his mouth open, eyes locked with Cas' as he holds his breath. Cas keeps massaging just under the head, the sensations warring with one another in Dean's body, and just as Dean lets out a little squeak, Cas eases up.
"I'm paying attention," Dean says, voice higher than before. "I'm here."
"Almost," Cas says, tilting his head, "but not quite."
"Fuck," Dean breathes, then grunts as Cas squeezes again.
Cas goes to his knees gracefully, hands still wrapped around Dean's sensitive parts, eyes still focused on Dean's. "When you know what you want, tell me."
Dean gasps as Cas licks the underside of his cock, then sucks on the head, still squeezing Dean's balls. "I'm here! Cas, I'm here. I swear. I-I wanna come. I wanna be good for you, and I wanna come. Wanna be good for you," he says, voice trailing off into a whisper.
Cas smiles up at him as he pulls away from Dean's cock. "You are good for me. It's part of why I love you so much," he says, watching carefully as Dean can't keep the eye contact because of the praise. "I love that you're so passionate and caring," he says as he eases the pressure on Dean's balls. "I love that you want to make the world a better place. I love that you see me as more than a vessel, more than a being of light, more than I was created for. I love that you call me on my shit."
Dean meets his eyes again, letting out a huff of laughter. That's what Cas has been waiting for. That first break in Dean's resistance is always the hardest. Cas rolls Dean's balls with his right hand while he still massages that bundle of nerves. Dean's cock is leaking, so he sticks out his tongue and licks the tip, enjoying the moan that comes from Dean.
"I've seen every part of you," Cas says, pleased when Dean doesn't look away. "And I love all of it."
Cas can see Dean struggling to keep the eye contact, but it's getting easier now that Dean has started to give in, to let the praise in, to let Cas make him feel good. Dean whimpers as Cas starts stroking his cock with his left hand, his right squeezing Dean's balls rhythmically, just enough to hurt.
"What do you want?" Cas asks again.
Dean winces. "I wanna forget," he says, voice more confident.
Cas nods. It was the answer he was looking for. "What else do you want, baby?"
Dean's brow furrows even as his thighs tense, the stimulation to his cock and balls becoming much more pleasure than pain. Cas strokes faster, then leans in and kisses Dean's lower belly, nose brushing against the skin. Dean's close to coming already, so he strokes faster.
"Cas," Dean gasps. "I'm gonna come. Can I come?"
"Not yet," Cas says, lips grazing the skin of Dean's belly.
"Ah, Cas, c'mon," Dean says through clenched teeth.
A quick squeeze to the base of Dean's cock at the same time as he squeezes Dean's balls is enough to push Dean back from the edge. Dean lets out a whine of frustration.
"What do you want?" Cas asks.
Dean chuckles, his body more loose, more relaxed compared to when they first walked into the room. Cas always loves seeing him like this. That odd period of time between Dean with his walls up and Dean with his walls down. It's something Cas doesn't grow tired of.
"Wanna see you," Dean says.
Cas stands up, hands still wrapped around Dean's cock and balls. Suddenly his clothes are folded and sitting atop the dresser, next to the flogger. Dean looks down at his soft cock, always amazed, because in Dean's head, sex and nudity is always erotic, always exciting, and always something that means orgasms. It doesn't mean that for Cas, and it's as if Dean has to see it for himself every time, to remind himself or maybe just to know that this is Cas here with him and not something wearing his face.
"Better?" Cas asks.
Dean nods. "Yeah."
Cas knows Dean inside and out, and to have a partner that's there for him, who isn't in it for the sexual pleasure is something Dean's never experienced before. He's struggled his entire life being the pretty one, the hot one, the one who makes panties disintegrate with just one look, the one who is good for some short-term fun, the one they can leave behind.
Dean craves the attention, but what he wants even more is to know that he's loved for more than his body, and he gets that with Cas. There are no ulterior motives, no objectifying. Cas gives that to him.
"I'm going to put you on the bed now," Cas says, and as soon as Dean nods, Cas lets go of Dean's cock and balls, wrapping his arms around Dean's middle, carrying him over to the bed.
He hears Dean chuckle and smiles himself as he lowers Dean to the bed and climbs on after him, using his grace once again to pin Dean's limbs out, spread eagle on the bed. Cas wants to see all of him, and now that Dean isn't hiding as much anymore, Cas can see it all.
Cas wraps a small band of his grace around Dean's cock, grinning when Dean whines. "I said you can't come yet," Cas says.
Dean pouts at him, so Cas leans down and kisses the pouty lips, making Dean smile when he runs his fingers over Dean's sides. He pulls back just enough to look Dean in the eye.
"What do you want?" he whispers.
"You," Dean says, then gasps as Cas wraps his left hand around his cock again.
"I'm right here," Cas says, echoing Dean's words from earlier, a reassurance and a promise.
Cas gets to his knees between Dean's legs and rubs his right index finger and thumb together, manifesting some lube. Dean watches him closely, his cock twitching in Cas' left hand.
"You can come when you've figured out how to ask," Cas says as he pushes two fingers into Dean's hole.
Dean grimaces at the intrusion, but doesn't shy away. He likes to feel Cas even if sometimes it's not easy to take. "Please?" he asks, giving Cas an adorable smile.
Cas chuckles. "That was very nice, but no."
"Aww," Dean complains. "Pretty please?"
Cas finds Dean's prostate and starts massaging with two fingers while stroking Dean with his other hand. "No. You can do better than that."
Dean groans, legs spreading wider and his hips coming up off the bed a little. "Mmm, yeah, like that," he says, eyes fluttering closed.
"You'd better come up with a better line," Cas warns, not letting Dean get lost in his own head.
Dean smiles, eyes still closed. "Bossy," he says without any real venom.
"I'm also the one who decides whether you get to come or not," Cas says.
Dean looks up at him. "But I'm adorable! Of course you're going to let me come!" he says, cocky attitude and a relaxed way about him that warms Cas.
Cas uses his thumb on Dean's taint, massaging his prostate from inside and out, watching as Dean bites his bottom lip and pulls on the restraints holding him down, back arching.
"Okay, please," Dean says, voice strained. "Please let me come, Cas. Please!"
"Better," Cas says, nodding.
"Better?" Dean says, frowning at him. "Just better? But I said please and I was polite and-ah!" he yelps as Cas presses hard on his prostate from the inside.
Dean's cock leaks more precome as he writhes on the bed. Cas stops stroking his cock and just uses his thumb again on that spot under the head of Dean's cock, small circles that will drive Dean insane.
"Please!" Dean says as he lifts his head up off the pillow and gives Cas his most sincere look. "Please let me come. Please. I really wanna come. Please, Cas. Please!"
"Almost," Cas says, fingers moving faster inside Dean. He leans down and sucks one of Dean's balls into his mouth.
"Oh, fuck!" Dean nearly wails. "Okay, okay. Begging. You want begging and, ah, fuck. Cas, please. Please let me come. I wanna know I've been good for you, and-ahfuckyeah, I wanna. I-ah. Please! Please let me come! Please, Cas! Please! Please!"
Cas lets go of the band surrounding the base of Dean's cock and lets Dean's sac fall out of his mouth. "You may come."
Dean comes so hard he screams, back arching to the point where Cas decides to give him a neck massage later because of the muscle pull. He's fucking up into nothing, because Castiel is still just slowly rubbing that bundle of nerves, still massaging Dean's prostate, and he eases up as Dean's body flops back down onto the bed, boneless and sated, a lopsided grin on his face.
Cas lets go of Dean, all his grace pulling back, and cleans himself and Dean as he pulls his fingers out of Dean's hole. He stretches out next to Dean, smiling when Dean turns and gloms onto him before he's even settled. Cas pulls the blanket over them and lets Dean get as close as he wants, which rivals what an octopus might do if given the chance.
"Thanks, Cas," Dean mumbles into Cas' chest. "Love you."
"I love you too, Dean," Cas says as he runs his fingers through Dean's hair, then kisses the top of his head.
"You make me feel good," Dean says, voice so soft that Cas wouldn't have heard it if it wasn't for his super-human hearing.
"You deserve it," Cas says, closing his eyes with a smile on his face because Dean's walls are all down, he's accepting the praise, and he's relaxed, happy, and content.
All Dean needs to know is someone will still love him after seeing the ugliest parts of him. Cas can give that to him, because Dean's got the brightest soul of anyone he's ever seen, and he means every bit when he tells Dean he deserves it.