Luna's talk show
This is my first ever fanfic.
Luna looked at her schedule for the day 12 oclock Albus Dumbledore was appering on her show discussing his problems such as stop this hat talking to me and my bird is a bomb in disguise. Luna laughed at the last story she had seen fawkes spontaneously combust earlier thatday she had been talking to Albus that morning about his 'death' in fact he had got tired of saving Harry's ass all the time so he had planned an elaborate hoax.
The problem was that Harry had took it all to seriouly and had got himself blown up instead he had gone under the name of 'Charlie' and had started a private investigation business and had his own angels he had come out of hiding when Neville Longbottom had become head of hogwarts as he sat in the corner of the room gently to and fro and whispering "Their all watchin me" as the people in the portrraits looked on the sorting hat was singing a song to the tune of 'ghostbusters 'which was making Fawkes the pheonix reach boiling point until he spontanheously combusted.
As luna fiddled with her lime green and fluoresent pink necklace she heared the chants "Luna Luna shes the women if she can't solve it no one can". it was the Lunatecs they were basicly a group of her minions that wanted to prove how obsessed with proving how they were truely. Lunettes a very small group of obsessed fans who wore anything that had the word Luna on it she stepped through the watermelon coloured doors and the crowd erupted literally someone had set off a Fred and George lava bomb at the time it had gone off
Albus had leapt under a chair and was shouting "I don't own a pink tutu damn that gay wizard magazine i got misqouted." A little old lady whispered to her friend "And i thought gandalf the gay was bad". With a flick of her wand Luna resumed the show to it's normal format as she had countless times before she walked over to her chair and sat down the crowd cheered as the she announced bald bird, a headless hat and a 'dead' wizard but she didn't attract any strange veiwers this was what people paid to see after her first show.
A rubber chicken blew up in my face. The public had gone crazy for it and now she had the oldest and most respected wizard of all time on her couch THE SORTING HAT it was so well respected that it had appeared in weaslley weekly which was wrote by Percy and set on fire by Fred and George.
Talking of them two they proved useful as many 'dead' wizards had turned up with stories about shampoo turning their hair pink and rubber chickens thet turned into goats they were now filming Merlins apprentice a search fior a young wizard with the same twisted mind as them.
Percy couldn't talk for a week when he had heard about it but the twins had also given him a rather suspicious looking gobstopper but as the twins had pointed out it was exactly as it said on the wrapper a GOBSTOPPER.
Then as she walked over to a present she had got from a mystery admirer a fluffy pink chair as she sat down she felt herself rising up as the chair turned into a very angry looking rhinocerous as it charged at her she ran leapingon the table as it burst into flame "FRED GEORGE" she yelled they pointed at each other and to explain how a giant turnip had stolle the chair and carried it away in a green audience burst into laughter as a hagged Dumbledore chased fawkes around the studio singing 1000 green bottles while the hat was singing i've got a lovely bunch of coconnuts Fred and George were now joking that there work here was donewhen their was yet another cause for mayhem to erupt Percy had arrived with a suspicous looking box of chocolates he yelled at Fred and George that his food tester who he had appointed after Fred had given him a penny sweet and had needed the loo all day but as the twins had pointed out they needed someone to test their products on before they went up on sale .