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Desperate But Not Serious

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Derek looked out over the sea of student faces idly, making sure no one was cheating, or trying to eat their blue books out of desperation. Whatever it was that undergrads did when faced with the fact that they actually had to do work in a third level Psych class. Derek really thought they had the easy end of the deal; all they had to do was what was assigned and actually think once in awhile. As a TA Derek had to suffer through their illegible handwriting, obscene doodles, and such barely comprehensible answers that made him wonder how they passed middle school English, let alone two prior semesters of college Psych. A fidgeting movement caught his eye, demanding his attention.

Stilinski . The kid was…annoying. Derek decided it was much better to settle on that rather than the potentially more accurate descriptors of distracting, or interesting, or god forbid attractive and alluring. No, annoying was definitely the best way to describe someone whose midterm paper on mental disorders used Disney Princesses as examples. Though using Belle as an example of Stockholm syndrome does glaringly obvious in retrospect.

Today Stilinski was even more…annoying than usual, constantly readjusting his position like it was causing him actual physical discomfort to stay seated. Derek weighed his choices. Stilinski was being a mild disturbance to his neighbors, but probably not as much of one as Derek calling him out would be. Confronting him after the test, one on one…that would probably be for the best.

*

Stiles’ ass was killing him. No matter what he tried, no position could offer him even the slightest bit of relief. Stiles mentally reaffirmed his vow never to work with Alex again, even if they paid him double. Money for tuition doesn’t do much good if he couldn’t even sit down long enough to take a test, and Alex’s big dick didn’t do much for Stiles either, if all it could do was artlessly pound away at the exact wrong spot in Stiles. And as Stiles had been blissfully unaware he even had a bad spot until last night…yeah, not even if he was paid double.

Stiles fidgeted again, trying to focus on writing the best damn essay ever on Batman’s abandonment issues, when he glanced up and saw TA Derek staring at him with an unnerving intensity. As always when he was the subject of the older man’s attention he had to take a moment to squash the panic of ‘he knows, he knows’ to remember that no, Derek did not know that when Stiles was starring as the bottom supreme for an online porn site, and that the only reason he always looked so blissed out when he got fucked and brought himself off was that he imagined Derek was the one behind him. Luckily Derek didn’t know all that. He just hated Stiles, leaving Stiles to question both his life and sexual fantasy choices.

*

“OK, allotted times up! Hand your booklets in and read chapters 14 and 15 to discuss on Thursday.” For some reason Derek felt that this was the longest exam he had ever proctored, the minutes ticking by slower than ever. After Stilinski noticed Derek…noticing him, Derek had been sure to avoid that area of the room till time was up. Now he was coming up to Derek’s proctor desk, behind the rest of the herd of students, walking slowly with his eyes on the ground. He placed his bluebook on the desk without a word and started heading toward the exit.

“Hold it Stilinski.” His voice sounded a lot rougher to his ears than what he had intended, but Derek couldn’t very well take it back now. “What was up with you during the exam?” The kid froze mid step as Derek first spoke and now turned around slowly, his blush trying to eat his face alive.

“You can…call me Stiles...you know…” Stilinski trailed off haltingly.

“I’ll call you Stiles when that stops sounding ridiculous. Now what was wrong with you during the exam? You were annoying other members of the class”

“I didn’t mean to, I just couldn’t sit down right because…”

“Because?” Derek asked, now more interested if blushing too much could cause someone to pass out.

“Because I fell down the stairs at the library! Like five steps, bam, bam, bam, on my butt.” Stilinski proclaimed, looking oddly proud of being that clumsy.

Derek realized, that for all his preoccupation with talking with Stilinski about his distracting, (no annoying, stick to annoying) behavior there really wasn’t anything he could do. Squirming wasn’t cheating, it was just eye catching. Extremely eye catching.

“Just don’t do it again,” Derek near growled.

“Ah, do you mean the falling, or the, umm, thing during the test?” Stilinski stammered.

“Both”

“OK, got it, I won’t do those things again.”

“Good. Don’t.” As Derek wondered why he couldn’t seem to manage more than one word sentences, the kid had turned and was making a beeline for the door. And if Derek took a good hard look at Stilinski’s…Stiles’ ass as he left, that was just him being concerned about a student’s wellbeing.

*

Stiles somehow made it across campus to his dorm somehow without anyone noticing his partially terror induced erection. As he locked the door and shimmied out of his pants he wondered if that was an untapped market; fear porn. Thoughts of how to market horror sex without it being too, well, horrifying, soon left his head as he finally got his dick out. He tried to go slow, to make it last imagining Derek…good god he growled at him, that should not be the turn on that it was… Stiles took his hand off for a moment and clutched at his bed sheets to try and catch his breath. He knew what he wanted.

No matter how sore his ass already was, after talking to Derek, getting reamed out by Derek, almost telling Derek about his ass… he just couldn’t help himself. He’s a healthy young man with an unhealthy crush on his TA. Nothing else to do but run with it.

At least that’s what Stiles told himself as he got the lube out from its hiding place under the bed, his cock so hard that the slightest touch against the mattress was agony and ecstasy all at once. He sloppily began slicking up his fingers and hole, almost spilling the bottle on the bed.

“Well it’s not like I won’t have to do laundry after this anyway,” Stiles muttered, hand tight at the base of his dick. He decided that after last night he wasn’t quite up to one of the toys in kept in the box with the lube, but some fingers…it was a bit harder to pretend his own hand was Derek’s, but no one had ever accused Stiles of lacking in the imagination department.

He slipped one finger in easily, than a second, and started searching for the sweet spot. Stiles pulled up one of his favorite fantasies, so very, very close to what happened after the exam. Laid out over a desk and being schooled properly by the hottest and scariest TA in existence.

“Oh, Derek, I know I’ve been bad. But you have to teach me,” Stiles panted aloud, giving up on restraint, his hand on his dick now moving frantically, and his other hand having finally, finally reached that sweet spot. “How can I learn if you don’t teach…Ahhh!”

Stiles’ orgasm came on hard and fast just what he needed. And if he closed his eyes when he licked a stripe of cum off his hand and pretended it was Derek’s…well he already knew he had it bad, so why dwell on it?

*

Stiles honestly had never given much thought to the porn industry before he went to college. Of course he had been a fairly avid consumer of porn, but getting off to videos of people fucking any available orifice, and Stiles asshole and mouth actually being fucked are two very different things. He had never thought about getting the lighting right, or that there’s starting and stopping and repositioning to make sure the all important cum shot is caught on camera. Never occurred to him that there’d be a tiny craft services table with his favorite brand of root beer in the corner, a discreet distance away from the slightly larger table holding condoms, lube, plugs, restraints, cock rings, dildos and vibes of every shape and size.

But Stiles also never thought, even despite his constant harping on his dad’s health, that anything would actually happen to his father. So when his dad had a heart attack and bypass surgery and had to be put on six months medical leave from work, Stiles’ went through fear, relief and anxiety in an alarmingly quick succession. His dad being alright was of course the most important part, the very most important part of anything ever as far as Stiles was concerned but…even with insurance there were still medical bills, and six months leave definitely meant no more of the overtime his dad had been pulling at the Sheriff’s office to help cover tuition.

His dad was so incredibly proud that Stiles was going to college that dropping out of school wasn’t an option. Even a year off would cost him the partial scholarship he somehow managed to get. And Stiles refused to add to his dad’s stress no matter what, so anytime money was brought up Stiles would pretend everything was fine. He was sure he could somehow manage to get by on a work study if he gave up things like curly fries. Or as he found out when he saw what the average work study paid, food in general.

It was really kinda counter intuitive how Stiles even began to consider his…current employment. Sitting in the quad one day, staring forlornly at his latest bank statement, he overheard two girls talking:

“Yeah, so this guy came up to me at Angie’s party and told me I was hot enough to be a porn star.”

“Ewww, that is so creepy gross! What did you do?”

“I had David toss his perv ass out”

“God, like you would ever do porn.”

“I know, right? What kind of person even decides to do that?”

As the girls walked out of earshot Stiles thanked the god of eavesdropping and decided that he could be the kind of person who does porn. He was young, single, perpetually horny, and he most definitely needed the money. Really as he thought about it his only real concern was his father ever finding out, but he was super confident that his dad was not going to be trolling gay porn sites, and reasonably confident that if anyone did find out they’d know better than to tell the Sheriff with the extensive firearms collection.

Stiles was a little surprised how easy it was to find a fairly local production house, but soon realized that proximity to a college town for a porn site company was like having access to a cornucopia of new spank off inspiration. From solo jobs to the top paying full on penetration, there was a never ending and always shifting talent pool. And after thinking it through, Stiles was more than happy to jump into the deep end. So what if all of Stiles previous experience was just mutual masturbation and hand jobs? He bet that giving up his anal virginity on camera would give him a way better payday.

Not only did the size of the check make his eyes roll back in his head and make him switch his allegiance from the god of eavesdropping to the god of porn, but Stiles discovered that he was really, really good at getting fucked. And he really, really liked it. So even if at a certain point he wished it was someone in particular thrusting into him instead of just the top de jour, it was still a pretty damn good job.

*

An obnoxious singsong trill cut through the air, startling Derek out the grading zone of despair he’d been trapped in for the past two hours. He leaned back in his chair and stretched before reaching over to pick up his cell.

“Laura, how does someone in a psych class manage to misspell psychological? Also, what did you do to my phone that I can’t change that crap you programmed as your ringtone?”

“Well, the answer to the first question is obviously that the universe hates you, and as for the second, I will never, ever, tell.” His sister’s delight in tormenting him, even in the tiniest ways, was something she had never really outgrown. The familiarity of it was almost comforting at this point in his life.

“I suppose the universe being out to get me is the only reasonable explanation for these tests. It’s a pretty fucking sad state of affairs when the best one of the bunch is all about Batman.” Derek said as he got up and began to walk around the office and work the kinks out of his muscles.

“Oh, is that one by that Stilinski guy you’re always on about?”

Derek halted abruptly mid step. “How did you know who it was I meant?” He asked, trying not to look and see if she was standing behind him. It was not exactly something he would put past her, and years of little brother paranoia had served him well before.

“You’re trying to resist checking if I’m there, aren’t you?” Derek could hear the start of a smirk in her voice even over the phone line.

“No I’m not.”

“Well that’s a lie. Anyway, I know about Stilinski because you’ve talked about him constantly ever since the semester started.”

“I have not-“

“How weird but how good his essays are, how clumsy he is, how luscious his lips are-“

“When did I ever say anything about luscious lips?” Derek asked, uneasy at where Laura was going.

“Well the word luscious was never actually used, but you did mention that you were tempted to buy him some chap stick because he seemed to lick his lips an awful lot.”

“That’s still not calling them luscious.”

“It is still paying a whole lot of attention to his lips. And his tongue.” Derek could tell that on the other end of the line the smirk was now out in full force.

“Look Laura,” he sighed, running his hand through his hair, “You’re making something out of nothing. Some people just stand out more than others sometime.”

“Maybe some people do, but you’re not one to talk about them.”

An uncomfortable feeling had been growing in Derek’s stomach as the conversation continued. “Laura, you don’t-“

“No, no, forget it,” Laura said, cutting him off. “I know you would never do anything inappropriate with a student…even if you really wanted to.”

“I don’t want to,” Derek ground out.

“Of course not. Well, I gotta go. You have fun suppressing your desires until your inevitable psychotic break that you should obviously see coming due to your field of study.”

“I am not suppressing-“ Derek started before the hard learned lesson from his childhood of when to pick his battles kicked in. “Goodbye Laura. I’ll talk to you again soon, ok?”

“Real soon, alright Derek? Oh, and check your email when you get a chance. I sent you a link I think you’ll enjoy when you get some time.”

“Why does that sound ominous coming from you?”

“Bye Derek!”

Derek looked down at his phone and grimaced, then went to his laptop. He definitely wasn’t going to get anymore grading done until he knew what it was that Laura sent him. He logged into his personal email and clicked on Laura’s message. Derek stared at the link she had sent him and blurted out into the empty office:

“What kind of sister sends their brother links to gay porn sites?”

*

Thursday’s class was fairly uneventful, save the expected whining on how someone’s pathetic attempt on the exam deserved a higher grade because they were a special little snowflake. The Professor was off on a short book tour so Derek was left to handle the class on his own again. As Derek suffered through ninety minutes of trying to get the class to engage in something at least resembling a real discussion, he thought that the book had better be one of the best sellers of all time to justify how many weeks he’d been flying completely solo, and he could use a little guidance in how to get the class more motivated. Well, the class except for one student who was taking notes furiously, and wrote essays about princesses and Batman, and whose tongue just darted out to lick his lips…

“Stilinski,” The student started at the sound of Derek’s voice and almost knocked his notebook off his desk. Derek felt the urge to smile rising up and squashed it hard “Can you give us all an example of a historical misinterpretation of mental illness?”

“Umm…” and the tongue peeks out again, swipes across lips that are not luscious Laura. “Well, umm, I guess a pretty good example that’s well known would be lycanthropy? You know werewolves? Ah, analysis of historical cases would suggest that it was usually some kind of schizophrenia or sometimes even possibly severe bipolar disorder paired with hallucinations.”

“Werewolves, Stilinski?” Derek was beginning to wonder if the kid was just left at a movie theater as a baby and learned the ways of the world there. Still… “That’s actually a good example. The delusions of the afflicted and the interpretation of his actions gave rise to the myths of werewolves.” He glanced at his watch. “Ok, times up for today. Read the next three chapters for Monday, and try to be more awake, alright?”

The students began to file out, suspiciously more lively then they had seemed during class. Unsurprisingly bringing up the rear was, “Stiles.”

If Derek thought that he had startled the kid before…the way his feet stumbled, back twisted, and arms flailed seemed to defy human physiology. “You’re a pretty flexible guy, aren’t you?”

“Not more than any other guy,” Stiles murmured, cheeks pinking. “Umm…Did you want to talk to me about…you called me Stiles?”

“I just wanted to say I was surprised you didn’t bring up Cotard’s Syndrome and zombies. And I figured that outside of class I can call you by your first name.”

“Oh yeah, I forgot about the zombies. So, so you don’t think my name’s ridiculous anymore?”

“No, it still is. I’m just a nice guy.”

“Yeah, ok.” Stiles’ shy smile at that brought a matching one to Derek’s face, one that he couldn’t have kept down if he wanted to.

Stiles waved and stumbled again as he left the room. After he was gone Derek’s grin faded and he shook his head.

“Damn it.”

*

Stiles was confused. Stiles was beyond elated. Stiles was also breathing deep to try and will down his erection, because even though Derek had been nice to him, had called him Stiles, had unknowingly added a new aspect to Stiles’ jerk off fantasies, Stiles did not have the luxury of getting off right now. Apparently his session with Alex had been pretty popular, though Stiles really didn’t like to think about the kind of people who got into watching two people go at it when one of them looks miserable. So even though saying no repeats to a top shouldn’t have been a big deal, the boss was a little peeved at losing what he had been hoping would be a popular series of vids. He tried to convince Stiles to reconsider, but Stiles, remembering that Alex was not just inept at fucking, but also had a sort of casually cruel air and disregard for Stiles, refused to budge. Stiles knew he was doing porn, but he also knew he was still worthy of some respect, especially from his damn scene partners.

So as a compromise of sorts, one that could only exist within the porn industry, Stiles had agreed to do a one off gang bang with guys from an approved list. He didn’t see it as really being any different than filming multiple scenes in one day, but if it got everyone off his back about pairing with Alex again he would take it.

So even though Stiles would much rather stay in his room and slowly bring himself off to the image of Derek’s smile, he was going to have sex with at least four different men in an hour and had to get ready.

*

Papers graded, his own coursework finished, apartment cleaned, laundry done; Derek had no more excuses not to visit the site. Of course he could just not visit it, delete the link, forget about it…but after seeing Stiles’ smile today he had to start being honest that he was feeling an attraction. He needed to release some tension, and while jerking off to internet porn might not be his ideal situation, it was the best option he had right now. And maybe one of the boys would have short brown hair, brown eyes, some lickable moles, and lips that he refused to call luscious.

Derek was pretty sure seeing someone looking like that in the videos would make him feel worse after he finished, but until then it would probably make the experience a whole lot more enjoyable.

Derek stripped down to his underwear and logged in using the user name and password Laura had included in the email along with the link. At some point he was going to have to have a good, long, and incredibly awkward talk with her about the differences of being supportive of your brother’s sexuality and paying off a month’s membership of a gay porn site for him. He pushed those thoughts out of his mind as Laura was definitely not who he wanted to be thinking of right now.

He started scrolling through the surprisingly well organized site, looking at the different categories he could choose from; performers, solos, group sex, first time…that one. Why not a first time for a first time visitor?

He clicked on the link for first times and was taken to a page with thumbnails representing videos, ranked in order of popularity. He decided to just go with the first one, labeled ‘Watch G Lose His Cherry!!!!’. “Well with that kind of enthusiasm how can I go wrong?” Derek asked with a wry smile, clicking as he worked his dick out of his boxer briefs in preparation.

The scene opened, mercifully free of any cheesy music, with a completely nude blond frat boy type sitting on a bed in fairly spartan room, the only other furniture a night stand loaded with lubricant and condoms. The blond looked completely at ease with his nudity, and had a look of calculating anticipation on his face.

“Hey, is the newbie ready yet?” He called out to someone off camera.

“He’s coming now Lance,” An off screen voice replied.

“Well nobodies cum yet, but just wait awhile!” The blond, Lance laughed while Derek groaned at the sad attempt at humor.

“I know I’m new, but even I know that joke must be done to death in porn,” A new voice, one that Derek almost wanted to say was familiar, said from off screen. But it couldn’t be voice he thought it was because he couldn’t imagine that shy, stuttering Stiles who blushed making eye contact would ever…

But Derek didn’t have to imagine it, because out walked Stiles without a stitch on.

And it was Stiles; there was no mistaking the slope of his mouth, the blush that set up camp on his face, the shine in his eyes, the endearing clumsiness in his movements …it was all the Stiles that Derek knew.

But it was also a different Stiles that held his head up high, looking unsure but determined, and strode forward with confidence despite a slight stumble to his step to have sex for the first time in front of a camera.

Derek’s guts twisted, but his cock was already well on its way to becoming rock hard and all that had happened so far was just Stiles. He knew he should turn the computer off, that he shouldn’t be doing this.

Derek kept watching.

On the screen Stiles was now kneeling on the ground in front of Lance, bracketed in be the blond mans legs. Stiles leaned forward and tentatively gave the penis in front of his face a small lick. Both Lance and Derek’s cocks leapt, as Stiles, emboldened, took the tip in his mouth and sucked.

Derek watched completely mesmerized as Stiles became bolder and bolder, bringing his hands up to grasp Lance’s legs to steady himself as he bent in further to bring in more of the other man into his mouth.

“Yeah, that’s it baby, you’re doing real good, use your tongue, like that, like that! You love it don’t you, you can take it all.” Derek didn’t want to hear Lance’s babbling, and was tempted to mute it, but that would mean that he couldn’t hear the sounds that Stiles was making, the little hums and slurps that were making Derek harder than he could ever remember being.

“You can take it…” At that Lance thrust forward and Stiles made a choking sound and pulled back. Derek’s gut clenched at the sound of Stiles’ distress, but once he was sure he was alright, he was distracted once again by Stiles lips. Red and swollen from their exertions, saliva dribbling down onto his chin…Derek bit down on his own lip, trying desperately to maintain his composure.

“Sorry, sorry. Was that alright? I mean was it good? Because it’s not like I can really practice on myself.”

“Don’t worry babe, happens to the best of us. Actually I was having so much fun I forgot this was your maiden voyage.” Lance laughed at his own joke again. Derek wondered if he had ever wanted to punch someone so much in his life.

“Oh. Good, great. And it’s a good thing you’re in porn not comedy, because that is some weak sauce dude.”

“That’s the way you talk to someone who’s about to fuck you?” Lance smirked as he got up to walk to the nightstand.

“Apparently so,” Stiles replied from where he remained on the ground, tracking the blond’s movements with his eyes.

Lance had picked up a condom and was rolling it on when he glanced over at Stiles and casually ordered, “Get on the bed.”

Stiles scrambled up from his kneeling position and practically fell face first onto the mattress. Lance picked up one of the lubes and dribbled some into his hand, then tossed it to Stiles. “Here, prep yourself.”

Stiles picked up the tube and drizzled out a generous amount onto his fingers. He reached his hand behind him and...

Someone working for the porn company had pretensions of being an actual film maker. As one camera was getting the angle on Stiles’ ass, the way he slowly worked one glistening finger in, then another, the footage was interspersed with images from a second camera of Stiles’ face. Derek was transfixed by every expression that came over Stiles’; every slight wince, every time his eyelashes fluttered and his mouth went slack when it started to feel good. It then switched back to showing his fingers, three of them now, twisting and stretching and thrusting in and out of that tiny pink puckered hole like it was their purpose in life. Derek felt a surge of relief that he had decided against muting the video earlier as he heard Stiles’ throaty moan drift through the speakers and go straight to his still untouched cock, rock hard and almost painful, throbbing and leaking precum against his abdomen.

“You ready?” Derek had almost forgotten there was anyone else involved when Lance spoke, and he was once more held by the thought that he should turn this off that he couldn’t watch someone do this to Stiles. Instead he gripped the armrests of his chair and watched.

“Ready as I’ll ever be,” Stiles said, pulling out his fingers so slowly that Derek imagined he could hear a gloriously obscene ‘pop’ with each ones exit. He then propped himself up on hands and knees, legs splayed wide, and looked nervously over his shoulder. “OK, let’s do this.”

Lance settled himself behind Stiles and began to guide himself in. As before Derek was shown two vantage points, the penetration and Stiles’ expressions. Lance was moving slowly, probably remembering to account for Stiles’ inexperience after his mistake earlier. But it was the sight of Stiles’ face that was setting Derek’s blood on fire. At first there had been some grimacing, but it was obvious now that after a rhythm had been set that Stiles’ loved it. The look of wonderment and pleasure on his face was incredible, and the sounds that he was making almost made Derek cum right then and there. He took one of his hands off the chair, not even noticing the pain as blood flowed back into fingers clenched too long, and pressed down hard at the base of his dick to help hold himself back.

Lance began picking up speed, plunging in and out of Stiles’ hole like it was the best place to be in the world, and Derek was beginning to think that it just might be. Lance then reached around and began to jerk off Stiles, who at this point was having trouble even staying upright on his forearms. Suddenly Stiles came, his mouth open in an endearing ‘O’ of surprise.

Lance gave one more thrust and then pulled out and peeled off the condom, tossing it off somewhere to the side, and began to jerk himself off. With nothing left to hold him up Stiles had collapsed entirely onto the bed in a messy sprawl, eyes closed and breathing heavily. He jerked and opened his eyes only when the first spurt of Lance’s cum landed on his back. Lance laughed at Stiles’ startled expression.

“Hey, everything needs a cum shot babe.”

If Derek ever met Lance he would be lucky if all he did was punch him.

Stiles flipped himself over on the bed and looked directly into the camera with a bemused expression on his face. Derek reached a shaky hand out to pause the video on that frame and let loose.

He didn’t even need the lube he kept in his desk drawer, his cock was so slick with precum. He didn’t bother with finesse; he just fisted his cock and started thrusting, imagining that he had been the one causing Stiles to make those faces, that he had been the one to have him make those sounds, that he had been one to be inside him and that he had been the one to make him cum…

Derek came hard, jism shooting out and landing on the computer screen, right on Stiles’ frozen face.

He reclined back in the chair completely spent and tried to gather his thoughts. Even though it was posted with the intention of being seen, Derek still felt like he had somehow violated Stiles’ privacy. There should be a difference between seeing a stranger and seeing someone you know, someone you’re supposed to be looking out for…

Derek sighed and got up to clean the screen and himself up. He stared at Stiles’ face in the freeze frame, his lips still redder than normal, his eyes a little dilated from endorphins. Derek sat back down.

Derek went to the section of the site where you could search by performers. Going from the first video it looked like Stiles was going by the letter G as a pseudonym. Derek clicked on the link and was taken to Stiles’ main page. There were twenty three videos; a good number of solos, but plenty of others with a partner. Derek leaned back in his chair, clicked on a random video, and watched another scene begin.

*

Derek was exhausted. He wandered through the stacks of the library aimlessly and glassy eyed, and if he was completely and shamefully honest with himself incredibly sore in the genital region and probably a little dehydrated. Once he started watching Stiles yesterday it was almost like it was physically impossible for him to stop. He went through all of the videos at least once, and then picked ones to re-watch again and again and again. And good god, he had not masturbated that much in such a short time since he was sixteen and had yet to figure out that chafing hurt. For all of the videos where Stiles was partnered he did the same as he had done for the first; he watched, painfully aroused and jealous, and when it ended jerked off imagining that it was him, not some stranger. Eventually his body refused to even get hard anymore. But he still continued to watch.

Derek wondered if something could be classified as a porn addiction if it was tied to a certain person, or whether it was just being a creeper. He felt that was something he should be relatively qualified to answer but he just couldn’t seem to focus.

It took what Derek felt was an incredible example of willpower that he had managed to wrench himself away from his computer to shower and leave his apartment. With no real plan of where to go he ended up at the library with the vague thought that he should actually research porn addiction while here. He definitely couldn’t do anything on his computer, with Stiles just a click away.

Some part of him still couldn’t quite believe that it really was Stiles, despite the obvious truth. It was just so hard to reconcile the confident, uninhibited, but still admittedly kind of endearingly dorky young man in the videos with the shy and clumsy student Derek knew…

And who had just rounded the corner with a slip of paper in his hands and a look of concentration on his face.

“Where are you Truman Capote, Stiles needs a passing grade in English…”Stiles muttered to himself as he meandered further down the row, checking the numbers on the paper for the books location. He hadn’t noticed Derek yet, his focus on finding the book, but he would reach where Derek was soon. And Derek did not know what to do.

A part of him desperately wanted to turn tail and run from Stiles and from the shame of what he had been doing, of what he knew he would do again when he got back to his apartment. Another part of him wanted to touch Stiles. Even just the most innocent of touches; just a fleeting brush of a hand, a shoulder bump, anything.

Derek’s body made the decision for him, and before he knew it he had walked right up to Stiles. However as Derek’s body was apparently determined to rebel against his higher mind in every way lately, it was less a matter of walking up to Stiles, and more of walking into Stiles. As their bodies collided and Stiles let out a startled yelp, Derek let himself indulge for the briefest of moments in just the feel of him, in his warmth and his smell and his realness. He pulled back quickly, filled with shame, but he couldn’t make himself regret it.

“Derek! Hi! Sorry, I wasn’t paying attention, I put off finding an author for my American Lit. class so I’m…doing that now. Yeah.” Stiles babbled on earnestly, his eyes shining at Derek, and all Derek could think of was that he knew the filthy things Stiles said while being fucked, he knew what sound Stiles made when he came. Maybe he should have tried running away after all.

“So what are you looking for?”

“What?” Derek snapped out of his reverie.

“What book? Is it for your thesis? Umm, that’s if you don’t mind me asking.” Stiles had found his book and was gripping it tightly to his chest, an expression that Derek was afraid to call hopeful on his face.

“Oh, no, not my thesis. Just wanted to check some books on addiction for something else.”

“Uh, then why are you in the literature section? Aren’t psych books on the third floor?”

That would explain why Derek had been having no luck in his half hearted perusal before Stiles came along.

“Yeah, I’m just…”Derek trailed off, at a loss for what to say.

“Are you alright? I mean you look kinda out of it, and you have circles under your eyes like a raccoon. But I like raccoons! They’re the adorable scavengers of the night! So that’s fine but…are you ok?” Stiles concern somehow managed to be heartwarming and completely crushing simultaneously.

“I just need to eat something and get some rest I think. I’ll be fine.”

“Are you sure?” Stiles was looking at him with intensity that Derek felt his traitorous cock twitch involuntarily.

“Yeah, I’m good. I’ll get something after I find my books.”

“OK…” Stiles said hesitantly, as if he was unsure he should leave Derek alone. “I’ll see you in class then.”

As he turned and started walking Derek noticed a slight hitch in his step. He knew what it was from, but something cruel and masochistic took over and he couldn’t stop himself from calling out.

“Did you fall down the steps again?”

Stiles stumbled in surprise and stopped, but did not turn around. Even so, Derek could see the back of his neck and the tips of his ears turning red.

“Yeah. Know I said I wouldn’t, but I’m pretty clumsy sometimes.”

Stiles walked out of sight, leaving Derek standing there alone in the stacks filled with remorse and shame.

*

Stiles had no idea what just happened. The last time he had spoken with Derek he had seemed more friendly than he ever had before, and while Stiles realistically held no illusions that it was anything more than a possible friendship, that in and of itself would still be… nice.

But at the library Derek was just acting straight up odd. He wasn’t being nice exactly, but he wasn’t acting like he hated Stiles like he had before. He probably was just sick, and Stiles had imagined it when it seemed like Derek had sniffed him when they crashed into each other. And there definitely wasn’t any sort of undercurrent when he asked if Stiles fell. There couldn’t be.

Stiles was sure that if Derek knew, he would never speak to him again.

*

Class was torture for Stiles. He had managed to not completely obsess and reanalyze his last bizarre encounter with Derek by devoting himself to working on his Lit assignment until he was positive that if one essay on ‘Breakfast at Tiffany’s’ ever brought a Professor to tears of critical joy it would be his. But now that was done and he was back in Psych class, and while Derek looked better than he had physically, there was still something about his demeanor that left Stiles feeling worried about the TA. He seemed completely unable to focus, and whenever Stiles looked up from his notes he saw Derek’s eyes darting around the room like he didn’t know what where to look.

“Totally lovelorn.”

“What?” Stiles turned to look at the girl sitting next to him, who he was 90% sure had never spoken to him before except to tell him to stop tapping his pencil.

“Hottie Hale. Even someone like you has to notice something’s up with him.”

Stiles decided to ignore the ‘someone like you’ comment, as well as the ‘Hottie Hale’ and focused on her first statement. “Yeah, but where are you getting lovelorn from?”

“It’s obvious . Maybe he broke up with his girlfriend. Or caught her cheating. Or he could be pining. He has kind of a pining look. It’s got to be something like that. Extremely romantic.” As she spoke the girl’s thumbs flew over her phone, tapping out text after text.

“Yeah, I…I guess so. Something like that. Umm, why are you talking to me about this though?” Stiles asked, thrown by every aspect of the conversation.

“Speaking helps me compose my texts, and talking to you makes it seem less crazy,” The girl answered bluntly

“OK…” Stiles waited to see if she was going say anything else, but apparently his usefulness was at an end. He discreetly worked on shifting his seat further away from the crazy lady.

But she could be right about Derek. Stiles had never thought of Derek with a girlfriend; in all honesty he had actively tried not to think of the possibility that Derek might be dating some girl, even though he had to admit that it would probably be weird if he wasn’t. After all Derek was a super hot, super smart, occasionally nice hetero guy…and now Stiles was just depressing himself.

Stiles had always known that knowing something in the back of your mind and actually openly acknowledging it were two very different things. And even though Stiles knew that realistically the only way he would ever have Derek was in his fantasies, it still hurt, much more than he thought it would, to have the truth of the matter laid out so bare.

The remainder of the class went by in a haze, Stiles’ hand taking down notes on autopilot, but when he glanced down at them when he started to pack up he couldn’t remember a single thing. He slowly packed his things into his bag and debated whether he should try and talk to Derek. He wanted Derek to feel better and to be happy, no matter what, but what was there that he could even say?

The decision was taken out his hands as Derek, who instead of waiting until after all the students were gone to leave as he normally did, bolted from the room before Stiles had barely left his seat.

Stiles knew it must have something to do with whatever it was that Derek was going through, but it still somehow felt like he had been personally rejected.

*

After his run in with Stiles in the library Derek had promised himself that he wouldn’t go back to the website. As it was Derek was pretty sure that he was on the verge of that psychological breakdown that Laura had warned him about. Trying to piece together exactly what shampoo, deodorant, and toothpaste someone used after only one quick inhalation was really not an altogether healthy and productive way for one to spend time.

Even after abstaining from the website and giving in to good sense and rehydrating, Derek was still absolutely useless teaching class. He tried his best not to let himself focus solely on Stiles, and he failed miserably. Nothing else seemed concrete next to him, just fuzz around the edges. After seeing Stiles all throughout class, taking notes, chewing on his pen, taking notes, not doing anything particularly seductive, just being Stiles Derek felt his resolve weaken and crack bit by bit. Derek raced from the classroom as soon as class let out, unsure of what he would say or do if Stiles tried to speak with him. Once he returned to the private confines of his apartment he gave up on his attempts to be noble and logged into the website again.

Stiles’ page had updated with a new video.

It wasn’t even a choice at this point whether or not Derek would click the link, just of whether he would bother to take the time to strip out of his clothes or just get his dick out. He unzipped his fly and worked one hand in to free his cock as the other hit ‘play’.

This video was different from the others. Stiles was the same as always; still an almost contradictory mix of shyness and snark, innate innocence and uninhibited sexuality. But instead of opening the scene with Stiles being alone and awkwardly yet enticingly flirting with the camera, or with some random guy who never seemed to understand how lucky he was, the video started with Stiles kneeling on the ground in the center of a circle consisting of four semi erect men.

The fact that Derek felt vaguely nauseous at what he knew was coming did not stop his dick from getting hard.

“You ready kid?” One of the men asked laughingly.

“If I said I was chomping at the bit, would you think twice about putting your dick in my mouth?” Stiles snarked back, a cheeky grin on his face.

“Well if he doesn’t want it I do!” Another of the men called out, grabbing a hold of his member and thrusting it into Stiles’ face as the others laughed.

Stiles started sucking the cock of the last man who spoke, as the others surrounding him started to lazily jerk themselves off the complete hardness. Derek ignored them, focusing instead on Stiles’ stretched lips and the small dribble of saliva that trickled down his chin.

Eventually Stiles pulled off of the first man and began his ministrations on the next, and then the third, and the forth. Above his head the men joked and laughed as they stroked their dicks, now slick with pre cum and spit, but it was all just a buzz to Derek’s ears.

Eventually oral sex time was over; two of the men pulled up Stiles and gently manhandled him over to a small table and bent him over it ass in the air, while the other two briefly went off screen and returned with lubricant and condoms. One drizzled some lube over Stiles’ asshole, causing him to exclaim in indignation, “Dude couldn’t you have warmed that up like at all first!?”

“What are you, some kinda princess?” One of the men joked.

“If that means I like my ass to remain at least somewhere close to room temperature then ye-yeessssssss,” Stiles stuttered and hissed in pleasure as fingers were worked inside him, stretching him open for all the world to see.

After a few more moments of Stiles getting fingered, each one of his gasps making Derek’s ache more than before, one of the men asked, “So who’s on first?” Stiles let out a startled laugh.

“Is ‘what’ second?”

“What?” The same man asked, puzzled.

“Our pretty princess thinks he’s a comedian,” Another replied.

“Well so long as you think I’m pretty…” Stiles said coyly, batting his eyelashes, causing Derek to both laugh and have another spurt of pre cum escape from his cock.

“Oh, we’ll show you pretty,” said the man who had first asked the order, and drove his dick forcefully into Stiles’ hole, causing Stiles close his eyes and let out a moan that hovered between pain and pleasure. Another of the men took a position at Stiles mouth, slapping his cheek with his penis until Stiles opened his mouth and took it in, while a third positioned himself underneath the table and took Stiles previously neglected member into his mouth. The forth man stood back, leisurely stroking himself and calling out encouragement.

After awhile the forth man tapped the one eagerly plundering Stiles’ hole on the shoulder. The man grimaced but pulled out, causing Stiles to whimper slightly at the loss, then gasping around the cock still in his mouth as the new man entered him. Everyone rotated their positions around Stiles, until they all had had a turn getting sucked, sucking, and fucking him.

Derek wondered if the psychotic break he was definitely having would be enough to get him out of the murder charges if he ever ran into any of these men on the street.

They took Stiles and turned him around so he was now facing out to them, though he was wobbly on his feet. The last to fuck him stripped his condom off, and they all began to beat off, their cocks all pointed at Stiles, as stream after stream of cum splattered on his chest and stomach, some of it dripping down and getting caught in the pubic hair above his still rigid penis.

The camera cut away from the rest of the men, who were laughing and congratulating themselves on a job well done to focus in Stiles. Left on his own he was trying to bring himself off, rubbing frantically at his cock, eyes still screwed shut and biting his lips. Derek was thinking of how anyone could leave Stiles to take care of himself when Stiles finally came. His eyes flew open and blurted out “Der-“ before dissolving into a satisfied sigh.

What.

Derek replayed Stiles orgasm.

“Der-“

“Der-“

“Der-“

He was saying…Stiles was saying Derek’s name.

Derek reached down and touched himself and came so hard after just two pulls the edges of his vision blurred.

He knew he should get up and clean up his softening cock and his computer where cum had hit it again. Instead he went back to the main page of the site where he had seen a banner earlier but ignored it at the time. He clicked on it now.

‘ARE YOU A HOT STUD THAT WANTS TO GET IT ON WITH OTHER HOT GUYS ON CAMERA? CONTACT US NOW!!!”

Derek took a moment to think about how he didn’t know why Stiles was doing porn, but he knew it didn’t really matter. Stiles could be an exhibitionist, he could just need the money, it could be anything. Derek didn’t, and couldn’t judge him for it. Especially because if it could give him an excuse to get close to Stiles, on Stiles’ home turf, he’d soon be doing it too.

*

Stiles had been planning to spend his weekend just chilling out and playing video games, doing some homework, Skyping with Scott and trying not to obsess over Derek and whatever mystery girl he may be pining over. He had thought it was a pretty solid plan, but when work called…getting paid will always take priority of Call of Duty. The only real part of his plan that he regretted having to ditch was the ‘not obsess over Derek’ part,; it was incredibly difficult not to think about Derek while Stiles was at work, as thoughts of Derek had become sort of integral to Stiles’ work process.

Waiting for filming to get started used to be super awkward for Stiles until it sunk in that even though it was porn, that didn’t mean that the people working on it weren’t cool people. Hell, Greg, one of the camera men was even going to film school. He would joke about how the porn job was preparing him for a life of filming wildlife documentaries, and Stiles would remind him that it was a lot harder to get a cum shot in the wild. And Dan, the director and co-owner of the company was surprisingly nice for someone who told Stiles things like “show off that glistening asshole”. The other co-owner was his wife Judy, who maintained the website and billing, as well as stocked the craft services table. Stiles sipped his root beer and decided he was a little bit in love with her for that.

“So Dan, what’s with the last minute stuff? You usually give more of a heads up. And what are we filming today anyway, you never said.” Stiles asked, fussing with his robe tie.

“Well, we have a new person interested in working here…” Dan started distractedly checking the lights.

“And?” Stiles prompted.

“And he requested you special,” Dan finished, satisfied with the setup.

“What?!” Stiles squawked. “Someone requested me? I’m not a hooker! And what if he’s a crazy person?

“We know you’re not for sale Stiles. He just said he was a fan of your work and that he thinks you two would do well together. And after seeing his picture, Judy and I agreed that if nothing else you two would at least look good together.” Dan said reassuringly.

“I notice you did not deny the potentially crazy person part.”

“I’m sure he’s not a crazy person. If he turns out to be crazy we’ll pay you extra for this.”

“Fat lotta good that does me when he’s wearing my ears as a necklace,” Stiles grumbled.

“I promise I won’t wear any of your body parts as a necklace,” a new, but very familiar voice said.

This is not happening, this is not happening, this is not happening, this is not happening, this is not happening , Stiles repeated in his head as he turned to the source of the voice.

“Hi,” said Derek.

*

As soon as Derek had hit ‘send’, he had waited for the rush of panic and the second thoughts to set in, but they never did. If anything it had felt as if the miasma of confusion and longing that had surrounded him for days was finally beginning to dissipate. And now that he stood here in front of Stiles, naked and already beginning to harden beneath a borrowed robe, somehow everything felt completely clear as it never had before.

Unfortunately it looked like Stiles, having been kept unaware of what Derek viewed as his descent into and emergence from madness, was possibly about to have a stroke. Derek considered the fact that he thought Stiles still looked incredibly attractive even while stupefied, and that he possibly was still a little bit crazy. Or at least something very similar to it.

“So, yeah, Stiles, this is Derek the new guy I was telling you about. Let him know about the ground rules, get to know each other a bit while we finish setting up,” the director, said distractedly.

“Ok,” Derek said, while Stiles continued to imitate a blushing goldfish, his blush creeping down to the small expanse of chest left uncovered by the robe. Derek’s mouth watered.

“Ground rules?” he prompted, taking a step closer.

Stiles’ mouth snapped shut and dropped his gaze. As fond as Derek was of the shy side of Stiles, it was not what he wanted, needed now. He came closer and reached out to touch Stiles’ arm.

“Stiles?”

At Derek’s touch Stiles’ head shot up and he jerked his arm away sharply, almost pin-wheeling with the momentum. After he regained his balance he took a deep steadying breath and looked up, though he refused to meet Derek’s eyes and kept his focus about three inches to the right of his ear.

“Ground rules are pretty basic,” he started out authoritatively, “always condoms for anal, don’t use real names while shooting and if I say stop or no to anything I mean it and you hafta stop, no matter what. That…that’s it pretty much. Just, just be cool about everything, and a-ask if you’re not sure if something’s ok, but like I said I’ll definitely tell if it’s n-not ok…” Derek couldn’t take seeing Stiles like this, like he was on the verge of breaking, and reached his hand out and placed it on Stiles’ neck. Stiles tensed, but this time he didn’t pull away.

“I’ll ask,” Derek said softly, gently pulling Stiles in closer. Stiles’ eyes finally met his, blown huge with a mix of terror, confusion, and arousal.

“Der- Derek why are you here? What are you-“

“Hey, we’re all set to shoot! You two ready?” The director barked out impatiently, already back from his tech check.

“I’m ready,” Derek called back over his shoulder. He then leaned in close and whispered to Stiles, “Are you ready Stiles?”

Stiles licked his lips those damn lips, and croaked out, “Ready.”

*

Stiles wasn’t having a panic attack. He knew what one felt like and this was not it. He had no idea what was happening, but it was always a good thing to have hyperventilating taken off the table. Slow, deep breathes never hurt anyone though, so he concentrated on that as he shed his robe and draped it over a chair. He turned and walked to the bed at the center of the set, eyes on the ground. Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out…

He reached the bed and sat down, unsure for the first time in ages what the hell he was doing. Sure he had fantasized about being with Derek, had wished that he could have him instead of some decent enough but just here for the paycheck guy who changed every session, but wishing for it and it actually didn’t seem to be in the same universe. As much as he played this out in his head, could he really just smile for the camera and start sucking Derek to hardness like he had for a dozen others? Shouldn’t it seem easier for someone he actually liked than an almost stranger? Stiles shook himself, and finally looked up as Derek disrobed and started walking over. Stiles took in what he was seeing and realized that, if nothing else, trying to get Derek hard was not going to be a problem.

Derek was already hard, and aside from his hand on Stiles’ neck, they hadn’t even touched yet.

Stiles felt his own cock, ‘til now having kept a low profile due to a blend of terror and confusion, twitch.

“So you’ve been filled in on the basics right? For the most part just go with the flow and try not to get any jizz on the cameramen, they really hate that.” Dan called out from the camera that was set up for static shots, but to Stiles’ ears it sounded like he was a lot further away. He looked up at Derek, whose gaze could only be described as hungry.

“Got it, no cum on anyone,” Derek replied offhandedly.

“Well except for me,” Stiles blurted, feeling his face getting hot. “You can cum on me.”

“I look forward to it.” Oh god, now Derek was smiling

“Oh this is gonna be a good one,” he heard Dan say to himself. “Alright, action!”

Stiles was, for the first time doing this job, at something of a loss for how to get started.

“So, I know you’re already…ready. But do you want me to ahh-!”

Stiles’ attempt to offer a not really needed but still sure to be appreciated blowjob was interrupted by Derek dropping to his knees, pushing Stiles’ knees apart and swallowing him down to the root.

“Oh my god,” Stiles panted as Derek hummed happily around his rapidly growing dick.

“This is, ah, usually I do this part instead for um…oh my god,” Stiles gasped as Derek did something very interesting, and definitely very enjoyable with his tongue, and then pulled off with a wet ‘pop’.

“Aren’t you enjoying it? Should I stop?” Derek asked, though his actions belied his words as he licked the thick vein on the underside of Stiles’ penis.

“No! No, this is good, real good, very good, routine is the silent killer and all, so a change of-oh my god,” Stiles babbled. “Oh my god, oh my god, Der-“ Stiles stuffed his hand into his mouth to stop from calling out Derek’s name. He knew the rules after all. He hated of thinking of that now when he felt so good, of where he was and the cameras…but those thoughts quickly fled. It seemed that Derek had heard Stiles’ almost outburst and he liked it. Though Stiles hadn’t thought it possible, Derek was now licking and sucking with even more enthusiasm then before. At some point one of his hands had migrated from Stiles’ leg to fondle his balls as well.

“Oh my god, where did you learn to do- ahh- that, if you do that again I’m gonna-oh my god-I’m gonna cum. Seriously, I’m gonna-ahh!- I thought you were straight, how can you-“ Stiles couldn’t stop talking even if he wanted to. Even if he was gagged, at this point he was pretty sure be would somehow manage to babble right through it. He looked down and saw Derek gazing up at him through his lashes and involuntarily thrust forward. “For reals, I’m gonna cum, you gotta pull off, you gottaaaaaaaaaah!!!!”

Derek did pull off, but only after one last twist of the tongue and hard suck that had Stiles cumming all over Derek’s face.

Stiles stared at Derek’s cum drenched face and tried to think of something to say. “S-sorry, usually I’m the one who…and I did try to warn you, that you know…cum was inevitable.” Stiles didn’t think he had ever spoken a more inane sentence in his life, but Derek just looked at him and slowly poked his tongue out through reddened lips and licked off the cum that had landed near his mouth. Stiles refractory period was quick…not that quick but oh god he was licking Stiles’ cum. He caught sight of Greg in his peripheral vision and remembered where he was.

“Hey, are you sure you want to lick that? You don’t know where I’ve been.” Stiles was obsessive about testing and knew he was clean, but still.

“Oh, I know where you’ve been,” Derek said seriously, unnerving Stiles, though he did pull up a corner of the bed sheet and wiped the rest of Stiles’…present off his face. He then surged up, pushed Stiles back and straddled him. Stiles, free from distractions such as having his brain sucked out through his dick finally got another chance to check Derek out. If he had thought Derek had been hard before…his, to Stiles’ eyes at least very aesthetically appealing penis was now practically flush with his stomach, glistening with pre cum.

Derek reached down and lightly grazed his knuckles down Stiles’ still soft and tender cock. Stiles winced slightly at the contact. “Still too sensitive for much more right now aren’t you,” Derek said quietly.

“Just give me a few minutes and I’ll be ready.” Stiles promised. They could always edit out the dead time it took him to get hard again in post. Stiles expected Derek to go and clean up a bit more while everyone waited; even after wiping his face, there were still globs of Stiles’ spunk in his hair. Derek, however seemed to have other ideas.

He slipped his hand behind Stiles’ head and leaned down, burying his face in the crook of Stiles’ neck. He inhaled deeply and licked, eliciting a small shiver from Stiles. Derek nipped and licked his way to Stiles’ mouth, leaving Stiles skin tingling in his wake. Once Derek finally reached Stiles mouth he latched onto Stiles bottom lip and bit down, not hard, but enough to know it was meant as a bite not a teasing nip. Stiles inhaled sharply while Derek took the opportunity to slide up and fully capture Stiles’ lips with his own. As Stiles reveled in the feeling of Derek’s tongue sparring with his, of finally tasting Derek outside of his imagination, he felt his cock begin to stiffen and fill once again. He started to rut against Derek, sliding easily with pre cum slicking the way.

Derek pulled back, chest heaving and eyes wild. He stood up and lurched over to the nightstand that held the lube and condoms, his erection barely allowing him to walk. He grabbed a bottle of lubricant and a condom and made his way back to the bed, tossing the condom to Stiles.

“Will you put this on me?” Derek asked, popping the cap on the lube bottle.

“Oh, yeah. No problem,” Stiles replied a little weakly, ripping open the wrapper. So far this had been nothing like any of the other shoots he had done, which was a good thing because Derek shouldn’t be like anyone else, but at least with all the others he knew what to expect.

He tried to focus on the task at hand and scooted closer to where Derek stood at the edge of the bed. He was about to roll the condom on, but he was right at eye level with Derek’s cock, and he hadn’t even gotten a taste yet due to Derek flipping the script on him earlier.

It was just a small lick, a little taste, but it was enough for him to let out a small sigh of contentment.

Derek grabbed him by the shoulders and yanked him up to they were eye to eye. “Just put it on me Stiles.” And oh there was the disapproving classroom voice, filling Stiles with another hot pulse of arousal, so much so that he didn’t even care that Derek said his name.

“Ok…”Stiles breathed, easing back down to cover Derek’s member in latex. After it was on he glanced up and saw Derek warming some of the lube in his hands.

“Will you turn over for me now?” Derek asked, adding more lube onto his hand. Stiles wordlessly turned over, his body almost thrumming with anticipation. Soon the first one of Derek’s fingers breached him, but it wasn’t enough yet, not nearly. He tried to push back, to bring more of Derek into him. “More.” He moaned.

Derek slid in a second finger and began to pump the two of them in and out, carefully, and for what Stiles wanted at the moment, much, much too slowly. Again Stiles tried to get more, but Derek switched his stance without removing his fingers, and now the top half of him was partially draped over Stiles, holding him in place.

“Do you remember when I said I knew where you’d been?” Derek asked with a thrust and crook of his fingers that made Stiles see stars.

“Ye-yes,” Stiles gasped out, not wanting this to end, not to have to see Derek on campus and pretend that this hadn’t happened, that he hadn’t made Stiles feel this way…

“I meant it. I know exactly where you’ve been. And who with. And how many times. I’ve watched them all, again, and again, and again.” Derek punctuated each again with another twist of his fingers. Despite the pleasure Stiles felt a knot of fear and shame at Derek having seen the videos, even though he knew he must have, knew it from the second he heard his voice. All thoughts of what came before fled as Derek pulled his fingers out, and Stiles keened loudly at their loss inside him. Derek took a hold of Stiles and flipped him from his stomach onto his back.

“I know it all,” Derek said, his voice rough. “And I don’t care. Because now you’re with me.”

*

Derek was doing his level best to stay in control, but it was very, very difficult. He finally had what he wanted in front of him, and it was even better than he had imagined. Stiles’ moans were so much sweeter when not filtered through computer speakers, his body so warm and responsive to Derek’s every touch. He was actually here, and real, the perfect mix of the weird, shy, smart kid from class and wanton and enthusiastic sexuality.

It was…Stiles was perfect, at least for Derek. But he didn’t know what would happen after this, whether this was his only shot. Sure he had called out his name in that video but that didn’t necessarily mean..For it to mean what Derek wanted, that was the hope that killed.

Derek shut down his thoughts and focused on Stiles, laying there, naked and inviting right in front of him. The tastes of Stiles were still mingling together in his mouth; of his neck, his mouth, his cock, his cum…Derek wished he could have an entire day, just to taste him. But today, especially if it was the only day, he needed to be inside him.

“Are you ready?” Derek asked. He knew that in this place he could have Stiles anyway, without always asking and checking in; but he wanted Stiles to say yes and be able to believe that he meant it. Stiles looked at him, eyes clouded with apprehension and arousal.

“You really saw all of them?” Stiles’ tone was hesitant, but his body was instinctually still trying to wriggle and squirm closer to Derek.

“They don’t matter,” Derek said, barely able to hold back from rutting against Stiles like a dog. “Like I said, now you’re with me. So are you ready?”

Stiles closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath while Derek held his. When he opened his eyes again, all traces of unease were gone, just leaving lust and what looked like an awful lot like tenderness. “Oh good god am I ready,” said Stiles with a grin as he made a move to turn back over onto his stomach.

Derek reached out and stopped him from turning, and couldn’t stop the growl that creeped into his voice. “No. Facing me. OK?”

“Oh my god…” Stiles gasped.

Derek took hold of Stiles’ legs and pulled his body closer to the edge of the bed. He then hoisted up Stiles’ legs and took a brief moment to appreciate how limber the younger man was. He settled Stiles’ left leg to rest on his shoulder while he held the other up, and used his free hand to begin to guide himself in.

He aligned his cockhead with Stiles’ slicked and stretched asshole which was waiting and twitching for him. Not for anymore of those undeserving overly waxed losers who were too stupid to realize what they lucked into. Just for him. He pushed in slowly and carefully.

As soon as the tip had penetrated him Stiles moaned softly, and then tried to impale himself further on Derek’s shaft. His position didn’t afford any real leverage though, one of the reasons Derek had wanted it, but far from the most important one.

“Just wait.” Derek said, the roughness of his voice sounding foreign to his ears.

“But I want it,” Stiles panted with another aborted thrust upwards.

“And you’ll get it. But only when I say so.” This statement brought out a shiver from Stiles that rippled down his entire body, right down to where he was joined with Derek. It felt incredible.

Derek began to push in slowly, trying as hard as he could not to rush any of his first moments within Stiles; he knew that he would lose that self restraint soon enough. He looked down at where the two of them met, marveling at the sight of him disappearing bit by bit into Stiles, of the way his cock made its way through the gateway of Stiles’ welcoming hole and into the blessed heat of him. To Derek it was like Stiles’ body had been waiting for him to come and make a claim.

With every additional centimeter of Derek that sank further into the blissful heat and tightness Stiles would make…sounds. They were almost impossible for Derek to categorize; moans and gasps and pants and coos, what sounded like more attempts by Stiles to prevent himself from saying Derek’s name…When faced with noises like that, Derek couldn’t help himself if his attempt at restraint flew out the window much sooner than he thought.

With one solid thrust Derek bottomed out into Stiles, drawing out from the younger man exactly what Derek had most wanted to hear, what he had been imagining every time he took himself in hand, ever since the first video played…

DEREK!!

It was the best thing he had ever heard.

After that he couldn’t hold back, not even if he wanted to. He began to piston in and out, lifting Stiles’ legs while trying to find the perfect angle for them both, while Stiles babbled beautifully beneath him.

“Oh my god Derek Derek Derek Derek, I dreamed about you, I thought about you, every time since I met you, every-single-time- ohmygodDerek, right, there, right there, please please please Derek, I’d come back from class and wished you would have…just take me over your desk, just take me-ohmygod!” Stiles gulped in a breath as Derek pounded and pounded. Stiles’ body was barely touching the bed anymore, his hands desperately trying to clutch at the sheets to gain any sort of purchase. Derek’s blood was thundering so hard in his ears that he could barely hear, but what Stiles was saying he just had to respond…

“Oh my god Stiles, when I saw, I realized, and it-ung- it clicked, why I looked at you, and then-ah- it was all I could think about-“

“-and then you smiled, then you were nice-ahh!- and Derek I couldn’t help myself, and it was just thinking, I didn’t want you to know, but I wanted you in anyway-oh my god- I needed I needed I needed Derek, right there right there please Derek right the-aaaaah!! Oh my go-o-o-aaaahh!!!”

Stiles came, his cum flying up between him and Derek, splattering them both. His body clenched around Derek’s cock, and what had been perfect before was almost too tight, too much, but it still felt so good. Some far away voice was saying something about pulling out. Derek obeyed in a haze, pulling out of Stiles with a whimper on both their ends. He rolled off the condom and looked down at Stiles laying on the bed; quivering, soaked with sweat, and sprinkled with droplets of cum. He just touched himself and he was cumming all over Stiles, his chest, his face, their cum mixing together on Stiles body.

His legs barely able to support him anymore, Derek hauled Stiles further up onto the bed and collapsed next to him. He tried to contort himself enough to lick up where their cum had mixed together, only stopping when a still shaky hand reached out and touched his face. He let Stiles guide their mouths together and kissed sweetly and slowly. After some languid kisses Stiles reluctantly pulled away.

“I don’t think I can walk right now.” Stiles confessed.

“I’ll carry you.” Derek offered, delighting in another chance to get his hands all over Stiles, no matter what they had just done together.

“I don’t think you can walk right now.” Stiles retorted, pulling Derek closer.

“For you I can walk.” Derek replied, leaning in and licking Stiles lips.

Suddenly a voice rang out shattering Derek’s post coital bubble.

“Cut! That was great guys. Very intense, very different from what we usually do.” The director said walking over the where Derek and Stiles had left their robes. He looked around and saw one of the other cameramen trying to hide the erection tenting his pants. He shook his head and looked back at Stiles, heart clenching at the fearful and stricken look on his face.

“Stiles-”

“Here guys,” the director said, dropping their robes down next to them. “And don’t worry, we’ll bleep out your names in post. Everyone gets carried away sometimes,” he said reassuringly then turned and went back to the equipment.

While Stiles looked slightly better, he still certainly did not look at ease.

“Stiles.” Stiles turned to face him, eyes wide.

“When I said that I didn’t care, that the others didn’t matter? I meant it.” Derek said gently, willing Stiles to hear his sincerity.

Stiles smiled, the shy sweet smile of the boy who wrote about princesses, and werewolves and Batman for class.

“And the part about being with you now?” He asked.

“Oh yeah,” Derek replied, leaning in for another kiss. “I definitely meant that.”

*

Derek was happy, arms wrapped around a drowsing Stiles when a horrible and familiar ringtone piped up, making Stiles jerk in his arms, almost making the both of them both fall off the bed. Derek huffed irritably as he worked one arm out from around Stiles, and tightened his grip with the other one. Using his free hand he grabbed his cell phone off his nightstand.

“What do you want Laura?” Derek grumbled into the phone.

“What do I want? Oh, I don’t know a lot of things…a townhouse, a shoe closet in said townhouse, for Hollywood to stop threatening to remake my favorite classic movies, world peace so I don’t come off as a selfish bitch…”

“Laura.” Derek growled, then kissed Stiles’ shoulder as he squirmed against him.

“But I suppose what I really want right now is why my friend is telling me that he saw you on a gay porn site. Can you tell me that Derek?” Laura finished, sickeningly sweet.

“Is this guy how you found the porn site you signed me up for in the first place? You and your friends might have some boundary issues. Scratch that, knowing you, your friendships are all probably based on lack of boundaries.”

“Your attempts at being evasive are just darling Derek. Now, why have you been moonlighting as a porn star? I mean I could almost understand trying it once, but Gary said there were at least five videos of you with the same twink.”

“Your friend watched all of them knowing I was your brother?” Derek was, not for the first time in his life, happy that he and his sister ran in very different social circles.

“Apparently you have a very dynamic screen presence. Congratulations. Now answer or I figure out a way to let mom know that in no way leads back to me.” Laura threatened.

“You’re the one who signed me up…” Derek said somewhat distractedly, as Stiles was waking up bit by bit and making downright adorable noises as he grumbled his way out of sleep.

“Derek…” Laura warned.

“If I tell you, you won’t tell mom?”

“I promise. Cause really, I don’t want to tell her. She’ll find some way to blame me.” Derek decided it was best to let that one go.

“I’m doing porn because it was the best way to ensure that my boyfriend could keep his job and continue paying for school without me going to jail for homicide for killing his coworkers.” Derek said evenly as Stiles grumbled again and blearily opened his eyes.

“The twink is Stiles?!”

“He’s not a twink, he’s my boyfriend. Are we done here?”

“…For now. At least I can be sure Stiles is taking care of your sexual needs.”

“Laura…”

“Bye, Derek. And don’t you and Stiles worry, my lips are sealed.” Laura said and hung up before Derek had a chance to respond.

“Your sister’s weird.” Stiles sleepily murmured as Derek worked to maneuver him so they were face to face.

“Believe me, I am very aware of that Stiles.”

“But hey, better she knows than my dad. And he’s the most important one because he’s my dad. And because he has a gun.” Stiles said as he tilted his head up to peck Derek on the lips.

“I’m not scared of your dad’s gun.” Derek scoffed.

“You should. He shames all his deputies at the range. But don’t worry, he likes you.”

“Really?” Derek grinned as he ducked down and liked a stripe up Stiles’ neck, making the younger man shiver and moan.

“Yeah,” Stiles’ smile shone like a beacon in the dim room to Derek’s eyes. “He likes what makes me happy.”