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Braden loves Brandi, and he couldn't be happier that she's having his baby. It’s awesome, he’s going to be a dad! Only, until now he hasn’t really thought of it that way. Having a baby is different than being a dad. Hearing the heartbeat or feeling the kicks are both different than seeing the size of her belly.
It really puts things into a new perspective, being a dad. At least, that’s what Braden has been told. He doesn’t think his perspectives have changed though, and it’s starting to worry him. He should feel something by now, shouldn’t he?
Granted, the baby isn’t even born yet, but he should feel like a dad though. His son is just waiting to be born to his parents and Braden doesn’t know what to say. He’s nervous in a way he’s never been nervous before. Hockey, in the end, is just a game. He’s gotten over tough losses there, but how can you possibly get over screwing up a kid? That’s a life, someone who will eventually play a role in society.
There’s no way he can talk to his parents or even Brandi about it because he’s Braden Holtby, nerves of steel. If they thought he was having issues with this, what would they think of him? So, Braden does the only thing he can think of.
“Yeah?” Green answers his phone. Mike is older and has had his share of relationships, though none have resulted in children that Braden knows of. There’s still the possibility he’ll be able to help.
Braden explains his feelings and asks Mike what he thinks, but after listening to Mike tell him about when he first got his cat – he named it Henderson because it’s better than what Backstrom would’ve called it – Braden thinks maybe he should go with someone who has a little more experience with both real relationships and parenting.
When Knuble doesn’t answer his phone, Braden calls Carlson. It’s more to vent than get advice, he doesn’t even mean to mention his feelings about being a dad, but it slips out as he rants about Mike being less than helpful.
“First of all, I totally call Mike and Nicky doing it,” Carlson starts off. “Secondly, it’s okay. It’s perfectly normal to feel that way and probably makes you a better father for thinking about the possibility of screwing him up,” he says. “I think you have to be patient and once you get to see him it’ll feel more real, you’ll feel better about it.”
“Yeah, you’re probably right. Um, thanks, John.” Braden hangs up. What Carlson said actually made sense and he really wasn’t expecting to feel better after calling anyone, let alone John-fucking Carlson. What did he know about being a parent and why was he so damn logical?
Braden closes his eyes and sighs, “I hope John is right,” he says, playing with the handkerchief inscribed Benjamin Hunter Holtby “I hope you know I love you.”
