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Sweet Tears

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Title: Sweet Tears
Author: [info]theladymerlin
Rating: R
Warnings: Major Character Death - mentioned
Pairing: Spike/Xander
Prompt: [info]tamingthemuse #302 Anathema & [info]kinda_gay #08 Beg & Taste
Chapter: 1/1
Status: Complete
Fandom: BtVS
Genre: AU/Song Fic
Beta(s): none, proofread
Disclaimer: not mine, all belongs to Joss
Graphic: Banner by [info]theladymerlin
Summary: Spike and Xander find comfort in the only place left to them
A/N: I've never done an actual song fic before so this is another first. Special note to [info]forsaken2003 Despite the warning, this fic is Forsaken safe. ;)

Song lyrics ~ Sweet Tears by Anathema

In each others arms
We cried together
And your tears tasted sweet

All is not lost
And never to be forgotten

Like a shiver down my spine
The lonely nights keep falling
And I still want you

All is not lost

Spike entered the apartment and limped slowly towards the couch. The pain of his wounds an afterthought to the pain in his heart. He choked back the tears he'd managed to keep at bay during the long and lonely night's patrol. He allowed the weight of the duster to fall from his shoulders wishing he could shed the heavy load of grief as easily. He kicked his boots off with a soft sigh quickly followed by his shirt. Spike took more care with his denims and grunted in pain as he carefully peeled the cloth away from the gash in his thigh.

Patrol had been lonely but not uneventful and he inspected the damage made by the sharp claw. Grabbing a packet of blood from the fridge, he chugged it cold not even allowing himself the solace of the artificial warmth. Tossing away the empty packet, he padded his way to the bedroom and entered through the open door. The pale, flickering light of a single candle bathed the room in a golden glow and highlighted the handsome, tanned youth waiting amongst the soft sheets.

Seeing the flash of concern in Xander's eyes as he slowly made his way across the room, Spike waved away any words of protective worry before they could be formed. Xander gave him a soft, understanding smile instead and lifted the covers in silent invitation. Spike allowed the warm arms to enfold him in a tender embrace and the strong muscled chest to catch his tears. Comfort given and returned without judgement. Hands made rough by hours of manual labour rubbed a soothing pattern along the planes of his back. Soft kisses left a trail of soothing warmth in their wake and awakened a fire of longing.

Spike sighed and let the outside world fall away. Feeling safe enough in this man's arms to face the realities of lost love and the possibility of something entirely new and unexpected.

 

And never to be forgotten

She's passed away but dreaming
Her soul's awake and screaming
The weeping willow is weeping
And beneath our hearts …
… all joy is sleeping
our bliss is carried away … sweet tears.

 

Xander opened his eyes when he heard the sounds of the apartment door opening and softly closing again. The tread of heavy boots across the floor was punctuated by a slight shuffling which indicated Spike was either very tired or had been injured. Xander guessed it was the latter when he heard the small grunt of pain. He grasped the sheets in his hands, twisting the cloth in his grip to still his desire to jump from the bed and check to make sure Spike wasn't badly injured. Spike would understand but still hate the overprotective gesture. The passing of Mrs. Summers, Buffy, and Anya weighed heavily on his mind. Willow's own suffering blinded her to anyone else’s and the more recent loss of a man, who was more like a father than his own, had left him floundering and needy.

Xander looked up as Spike entered the room and his breath caught when he saw the jagged tear in the flesh of one pale, muscled thigh. He relaxed when Spike waved away his concerns and he lifted the covers asking Spike to join him.

It still managed to surprise him when Spike readily accepted the offered comfort, sliding into his arms and fitting perfectly against Xander's side. Xander didn't bother to deny or examine his need for the other man. The simple act of holding and comforting was a balm to his own tortured heart and soul. Xander found the feel of the smooth skin under his hands soothing and felt a calm descend. He placed tender kisses along the cool flesh feeling the muscles twitch slightly. Xander's cock twitched in response as a small kernel of desire began to form. A longing for sweet tasting kisses and his body begging for something he'd never before imagined.

Xander smiled when he felt Spike relax and heard the soft sigh which left his lips. He was content to offer the comfort of his arms this night. There were many nights when Xander found himself held by Spike's strong arms while scalding tears of grief tracked slowly down his cheeks. Simple comfort being offered and returned, making him feel safe and protected. Loved. Xander had no desire to question only to accept what was being offered and allow himself the hope which comes with something new.

~ Mòran taing ~