Chapter Text
(SupremeCommander’s Profile
I may be ginger, but I’m also an airline captain
Name: Martin
Age: 33
Location: Fitton, UK
Sexuality: Gay
Looking for: A relationship
About me
If you’re not put off by ginger hair, freckles, and an astounding lack of social skills, then I might be just the chap for you. Once you get past the awkward babbling and incoherence, I’m fairly decent.
I’m the captain of a tiny charter airdot, so I spend a lot of time trapped in a tin cupboard with my very witty first officer. I’ve been all over the world, although after a while one airport looks much like another.
There are some that would claim I have no hobbies. This isn’t strictly true. I love to read, especially Agatha Christie novels. I watch old movies, particularly Chaplin and the Marx Brothers. I’ve even been known to take an interest in cricket and tennis. My first officer claims that I’m not as hopeless as I initially seem.
I’m looking for a decent, kind and - crucially - patient man who will put up with me and help me not make a fool of myself so frequently.)
(SirKnight’s Profile
Looking for someone to laugh with
Name: Henry
Age: 30
Location: Dartmoor, UK
Sexuality: Gay
Looking for: A relationship
About me
Hello! My name is Henry and I’m an architect. I like the outdoors, nature, travelling, watching movies, reading and cooking. I’m looking for someone understanding and honest, with a sense of humour.)
Thursday 15th March
From: SirKnight
Hi Martin,
You seem to be under the illusion that ginger hair and freckles are a bad thing, so I thought I should write to tell you that they really, really aren’t. At least not in my book, and definitely not on smiling airline captains. (Or airdot captains, though I’m afraid I’m not sure what exactly an airdot is.)
I’m wondering why anyone would think you have no hobbies, when clearly you have several. Do you spend a lot of time working? I could understand if you did - I remember wanting to be a pilot as a kid. My father was a great plane enthusiast, so I was probably inspired by that. Unfortunately it’s not really a job that goes well with a fear of heights, but I still have Dad’s plane model collection.
Liking Agatha Christie is obviously a sign of great taste. I was basically brought up on the books, and they’re still my comfort reading. So I really have to ask the crucial question: Poirot or Miss Marple?
This was meant to be a witty first email – in the very likely case that it wasn’t, at least now you know that any amount of social awkwardness can’t possibly astound me, so you really don’t need to worry about that.
Best,
Henry
PS: Do I dare to ask why there is a lemon among your pictures?
To: Douglas Richardson (07875676532)
I will kill you in your sleep.
From: Douglas Richardson (07875676532)
I don’t have the slightest idea what you are talking about. Good luck, Supreme Commander.
From: SupremeCommander
Hello Henry.
I’ve spent about half an hour sitting here trying to work out how to reply to this. For a while I wasn’t going to reply at all, but that would be rude. So here goes.
The thing is, I didn’t set up that profile - my “very witty” first officer did, presumably in a bid to humiliate me in some fashion. Judging by the picture he chose, that was almost certainly his intention. I feel as though I should apologise for it - I think red wine had been involved at some point before that photo was taken. The lemon is something of an in-joke on our plane. It’s basically hide-and-seek with a lemon. I don’t really know why we play it.
Anyway, I had no idea that this was floating out there on the internet, so I’m afraid you’ve been a bit... misled. Slightly. Well, no. The information on the profile is accurate, for the most part. I just didn’t put it there. I am an airline captain. We call it an airdot though because the company only has one jet, and as my boss says, “you can’t put one jet in a line”.
I think you might be one of the only people in the world who doesn’t mind ginger hair and freckles. You’re a rare breed, at least. David Attenborough should do some sort of documentary on you. (Is that a weird thing to say? I don’t know. I shouldn’t try to be funny.) I’m sorry that you’re scared of heights. I never have been (not too fond of falling from them, but I think that’s a fairly natural fear). I’ve always wanted to fly, ever since I was very young. I have a lot of model planes too: I think I built my first Airfix Spitfire when I was about four. What is it that you do now? Something that involves staying at ground level?
The very first Agatha Christie book I read was “Murder on the Orient Express”, but my favourite is “Death in the Clouds” (can you sense a running theme?) so I think Poirot has to win. I do like Miss Marple though. I was compared to her once, which was a bit odd.
Oh God, I seem to have gone from “not wanting to reply” to writing you a bit of an essay. I’m sorry about that, and I’m sorry that you were... misled. I’m not really looking for anything at the moment, despite what Douglas seems to think. I work a lot and I don’t have very much free time, so any kind of relationship is a bit unfeasible. Not that that was definitely going to happen, of course. Just... thought I should mention it.
Sorry again, and all the best.
Martin
From: SirKnight
Hello Martin,
When I wrote to you, I thought I had envisaged all the possible ways in which it could go wrong, but it really didn’t occur to me I could be writing to someone whose profile was there without his knowledge. It is exactly the kind of embarrassing thing that would happen to me, so I’m not even as surprised as I probably should be. I sort of expected the whole online dating thing to be a disaster anyway. Sorry for the unwanted attention.
Playing hide and seek with a lemon and setting up dating profiles for colleagues is not exactly how I imagined the airline business to go, to be honest. Are things like that a common occurrence in your airdot? Your first officer seems…interesting. I don’t know what his intentions were, of course, but I don’t think the picture is humiliating. It’s genuine, which is not what you usually see on people’s profiles. And you have a very lovely smile.
I’m an architect, though I’m out of a job at the moment. My life has been in a bit of a mess for a while but I’m trying to put it back together now, which is why I thought I’d give online dating a try – I am told that a new job and/or a new relationship are the things you need to make a fresh start. Clearly the job will be the safer bet. (Did that sound bitter? Sorry if it did.)
In what way are you like Miss Marple? Did you solve a mystery, or is it because you like knitting? :) Murder on the Orient Express was my grandmother’s favourite, so it was probably the first I read too, though I don’t remember. I think my favourite is Death on the Nile.
You don’t have to feel obligated to reply, I understand that you never asked for this. I’d be glad to hear from you, of course, if you wanted a… pen pal or whatever. Just don’t worry about it if you don’t.
All the best,
Henry
From: SupremeCommander
Hi Henry,
I once told my first officer that I’d looked at online dating and then chickened out, so I know what you mean about imagining it to be an unmitigated disaster. The attention isn’t unwanted it’s just... unexpected. And surprising.
Playing hide-and-seek with a lemon and setting up secret dating profiles isn’t how I imagined the airline business to go, either. To be honest, I’m fairly certain it isn’t typical - I think I just work for a very unusual company. Those things are actually quite harmless and dull compared to some situations we end up in. At least these don’t result in being held captive by an airfield manager, or chasing polar bears.
It’s impossible to tell what Douglas’ intentions are. He usually has about seven schemes running at once. I did wonder why he was taking pictures of me, but I suppose I have my answer now. I always think my smile makes me look ridiculous - it’s like my whole face collapses. Thank you for the compliment, though. I looked on your profile after I got your e-mail, and you look lovely, which is why I’m replying. Not that I’m replying just because of the way you look - you seem lovely in your e-mails too. I’m not shallow or anything. I like your ears (and I really hope you don’t mind me saying that - sorry!)
Being an architect sounds interesting, though I admit that I don’t really know what you do. Design buildings, I suppose? Good luck in getting more work. I know it can be difficult if you’re freelance when you’re not getting clients and things. I’m really sorry to hear that things have been tough for you lately, and I hope you can work things out. I’d say you can talk to me if you ever need to, but you don’t know me and I don’t know how useful I’d be. I hope you have people around to help you, anyway.
I think “Murder on the Orient Express” is the first Christie most people read. Did you hear that the BBC are doing a modernised version of the Poirot stories? It should be interesting, if nothing else. Our steward, Arthur, compared me to Miss Marple when we were trying to find out who stole a bottle of expensive whiskey on a flight to Paris. Arthur is very excitable, and he decided that my trying to figure it out made me the same as Miss Marple. He was a bit disappointed that it wasn’t the “person we’d least expect”, because it was Douglas who had stolen it. I don’t knit, no. I’d probably end up stabbing myself in the eye with the needles or something. Probably safest not to try.
I think I’d really like to e-mail you a bit more if that’s okay. I don’t want to... lead you on or anything, but it would be nice to be friends, at least. If that’s all right, of course.
Have a good day,
Martin
Friday 16th March
From: SirKnight
Hi Martin.
Chasing polar bears? Being held captive by airfield managers? Stealing whiskey? This is getting more and more unlike anything I had imagined. Sounds like you lead an exciting life with interesting colleagues. Who else is there apart from Douglas and Arthur? If you aren’t fed up with talking about work, of course.
I refurbish old buildings – conversions and extensions and thing like that. Initially I wanted to do restorations of historic monuments, but I ended up with residential houses, for the most part. It’s not something I thought I’d enjoy at first, but it’s very satisfying in its own way – helping people to get the kind of home they dream of (yeah, I’m secretly a softie), and coming up with ways to combine the old and the new. I had to turn down clients for some time because I was a bit… distracted, and I didn’t want to accidentally design something that would fall down on their heads at the first gust of wind, which wasn’t exactly the best promotional strategy, but I’m getting back on track now and hopefully something will crop up soon.
I don’t know what to think about the modernised Poirot. Anyone with that kind of moustache would just look silly nowadays, but you can’t have Poirot without it, can you? It’s so iconic. But who knows. Maybe they’ll surprise me.
I think protruding ears are right up there with ginger hair and freckles in terms of how many people like them, so thanks for the compliment. I’m trying to forget that my profile exists – I think I spent about two hours trying to come up with something original and interesting, and then I kind of gave up. I certainly wouldn’t mind if someone wanted to write these things for me, but admittedly I’d rather if they asked me first. Has Douglas explained why he did that?
I think it would be great to be friends. I might be better at that, at least.
Where are you flying to next?
Henry
From: SupremeCommander
Hi Henry,
There's nothing wrong with being a softie. Your work sounds really interesting! I admit that sometimes I see an old building that someone has modernised and it makes me feel a bit upset. I remember being in Stratford-upon-Avon a few months ago, and amongst all these gorgeous Tudor cottages someone had put on a really ugly modern extension, and it totally ruined it. Not that I imagine you ruin houses like that, of course! Do clients ever ask you to design totally ridiculous things? I may have watched slightly too many episodes of Grand Designs in my time, so that's what I have in my head.
I don't mind talking about work – I'll complain, but I really do love flying. It's more a case of having to shut me up about it, to be honest. Those are the more dramatic examples of our... escapades. I keep the details of them for when I run out of things to say to people (which tends to happen very quickly). They're my go-to stories. A lot of the time it really isn't that interesting. We once spent eighteen hours flying from Hong Kong making up limericks and playing twenty questions. We play a lot of word games.
Don't tell anyone, but we technically don't have enough people in our airdot to really function as a company as we only have one crew. So neither Douglas or I are ever allowed to be sick, and if we were our boss would hunt us down with a harpoon or something. There's just us two pilots, Arthur the steward, and his mum Carolyn who owns the company and also does cabin crew duties (which usually consists of terrorising the passengers). I sometimes feel like the straight man in a comedy group (figuratively speaking, of course), and the joke's on me. It's a weird company, but I do like working for it. It's like an exceptionally dysfunctional family that exists at 30, 000 feet.
Douglas' explanation consisted of, “Good luck”, which wasn't really an explanation at all. I've not actually told him that you replied, because he'll just be smug and self-righteous over it, and he's like that enough as it is. I'll find some way to get back at him, eventually. So far I've just settled for sending him a slightly abusive text. Which he laughed at.
Between us we're a childhood bully's dream, aren't we? I remember realising I was gay and thinking, “Oh, I couldn't just be ginger, freckly and shy, could I?” But your ears are lovely, I like them. And your profile was fine, I think! I don't know what I would have said if I'd had the choice to write mine.
Maybe Poirot moustaches are still popular in Belgium? I hope not. No one can really pull off a moustache any more. The last person to manage it was Freddie Mercury.
We’re flying to Cardiff tomorrow for the Six Nations Rugby Final - we call it “Birling Day” because this old guy Mr Birling hires us every year to take him to the final. He’s the one with the expensive whiskey, so I’ll be spending most of my time trying to stop Douglas stealing it. Do you have any exciting/interesting/boring plans coming up?
Martin
From: SirKnight
Hi Martin,
I’ve never been asked to design anything really crazy. There was this one rather eccentric couple who’d decided that what their house lacked was a tower on each corner – that’s probably the most extravagant thing I’ve done. I did what I could to make it look the least silly possible, which was still very silly, but they were so excited about it that it was really worth it. They still send me Christmas cards every year. But usually people want fairly normal things, sometimes they just have unrealistic expectations and want me to magic up space they don’t have or find a way to do whatever they want done for next to no money. It’s the lack of money that’s often behind the ugly extensions that you’ve seen – or lack of taste, of course, but generally if people have the means for it they can be convinced to go for something more tasteful.
My ears were unsurprisingly a frequent object of ridicule at school – “Dumbo” was one of the nicer nicknames I had. It’s sweet of you to say you like them, but you should really stop with the compliments, it’s making me blush! My neighbour’s cat has come to visit and is eyeing me suspiciously – I suspect the shade of my face is getting alarming. (I have a neighbour who’s the epitome of the stereotypical old lady who has more cats than she can keep track of, and occasionally one of them wanders into my garden and keeps me company for a while, which is quite nice.)
Usually my plans would include nothing more exciting than planting tomato seeds, but this weekend my cousin Jenny is coming to stay over. She wants to introduce her boyfriend to me, and given her excited but secretive phone call about “big news”, I strongly suspect he’s now her fiancé. I suppose that since I’m the closest thing to an older brother she’s got, I’m duty-bound to dislike him, take him aside and threaten to make him regret the day he was born if he ever hurts her. Perhaps I should practice some menacing grimaces in front of the mirror, but I’m afraid the ears would make them look rather ridiculous, so it’ll probably be no use.
Your flight stories are definitely more original than talking about the weather, which is usually what I go for before awkward silence inevitably falls. It’s great that you get along so well with your co-workers, though I must say your boss sounds rather scary – but I suppose trying to ensure that your employees never get sick must be quite stressful, so perhaps that’s understandable. What do you do when you do get sick? Are you ever allowed to take a holiday, or is that off limits too?
So the attempted whiskey theft is a yearly occurrence, then? Is Douglas some sort of whiskey connoisseur? In any case, I hope Miss Marple saves the day this time!
Have a safe flight!
Henry
Sunday 18th March
From: SupremeCommander
Hi Henry,
Well, the trip was successful thanks to Wales winning. Mr Birling is Welsh, so he was very pleased- as well as very drunk. There were a lot of Welsh songs sung, and a lot of abuse of the French and the English. And the Scots, when he realised that I have a Scottish surname. Douglas did manage to steal the whiskey through a scheme involving silly straws, empty shampoo bottles and 'accidentally' locking Arthur in the loo. Luckily we figured it out before Mr Birling could kill us with his tie pin.
Congratulations to your cousin if she is engaged, and I hope you managed to strike fear into the boyfriend's heart. I never tried that on my sister Caitlin's fiance, because I'm seven years younger than her and Tom is a MASSIVE rugby player. It didn't seem like a good plan. I'm sure you managed to be a bit more intimidating.
If the crazy neighbour has that many cats, can't you steal one permanently? Surely she won't notice. I would love a pet, but I'm away too much really. I wanted a dog when I was younger, but Caitlin is allergic.
You're the one who started the compliments by going on about my smile, but I'll stop if you like. And trust me, you haven't seen blushing until you've seen my "volcanic" blushing.
I've never dared call in sick, so I flew to the States with flu not long ago. It was unpleasant. We don't get holidays as such, but since it's a charter business there can be a lot of time between trips.
I've just seen that you live in Dartmoor. What's that like? I bet it's incredible. I've never been, but it looks beautiful. Certainly nicer than Fitton!
I hope you had a lovely weekend :)
Martin
From: SirKnight
Hi Martin,
I’m glad to hear the whiskey was recovered and there were no casualties :)
Jenny is indeed engaged. Her fiancé isn’t a rugby player, but I’m afraid my attempts at intimidation still didn’t proceed very far. Or at all, really. He seems nice and clearly adores her, though, so I think perhaps it wasn’t even necessary. Plus he looks a bit like Jude Law – I think she has done very well for herself.
I used to have my own cat, but he died about a year and a half ago. I had him for years, and so far I haven’t been able to even consider getting a new one. But maybe it’s time – I have been trying to make all these changes, and it would be nice to have a feline companion again – even if no one can ever replace Sir Jingles. Certainly not one of Mrs Baker’s cats, though. They are used to running free wherever they want, which my cat certainly couldn’t – I’d be constantly worried about it getting run over or attacked by a dog or something. Maybe you could get something undemanding, like a fish? I remember reading about a goldfish that survived without food for four months after the earthquake in New Zealand – they certainly seem like hardy creatures.
Is Caitlin your only sibling? Do you have any nieces or nephews? Sorry, this sounds like a questionnaire. I’m just curious – I’m an only child and Jenny’s family live in Canada, and I’ve always thought it must be great to have a big family – even though many people who do have big families tried to convince me otherwise.
I had to compliment your smile. You can’t hold that against me – you obviously had a far too low opinion of it, I couldn’t let that continue. Nobody should ever feel self-conscious about the way they smile, and especially not people whose smiles are as lovely to look at as yours.
Dartmoor is a beautiful place. It can be a bit too bleak for some people, I suppose, but I really like it, even though I have some not very good memories associated with it. There are some amazing landscapes, and there’s nothing like an early morning walk on the moors. I’d lived here until my father died when I was nine and then I never really wanted to come back, but now I couldn’t imagine living anywhere else. You should definitely visit sometime.
Best,
Henry
Monday 19th March
From: SupremeCommander
Hi Henry,
You're still doing that compliments thing – stop it, or I won't. Your ears are adorable and you have a lovely smile too. Hah, take that!
Jude Law, hey? Definite congratulations are in order, then! I'm glad he seems nice, despite your lack of intimidation skills.
I have a brother as well, called Simon. He's two years older than Caitlin. I think I was a somewhat unexpected child, considering the age gap – I imagine I annoyed them both to no end when I was growing up. Though I have been reliably informed that that is the job of younger siblings. I don't really talk to Simon now though – we've never got on, and he was not impressed when I came out.
Caitlin and I get on quite well now, though we don't see each other that often. Simon's got two boys, Jamie and Sam, and I wish I could see them more, but there's not much I can do about it. Caitlin and Tom had a little girl last year, and she's beautiful. Her name's Elsie, after our mum. She's just started walking, which is very exciting! My mum died when I was fifteen, and my dad passed away a few years ago, so we're quite a small family, really. I can't imagine being an only child.
I'm really sorry to hear about your dad – it's difficult losing a parent so young. I can understand why you would want to be somewhere else. Where did you live before you went back to Dartmoor? I'd love to see Dartmoor someday. I like walking, and there are a few places round here but they're mostly fields filled with sheep. They're not exactly appealing to the eye.
I had considered getting a goldfish, but I think they're more work than people think, even if they can survive earthquakes. Apparently you can't just stick them in a bowl of water and leave them there. They need big tanks and filters and all sorts of things. Long gone are the days when you could win one at the fair! Though I did always feel a bit sorry for those fish, so maybe it's for the best. I'll just carry on giving bread to the ducks in the park, I think.
I thought all cats tended to run around everywhere and get into trouble, but I suppose I must have been mistaken. Definitely don't get one that will make you worry about it, that sounds far too stressful! I have to ask: why on earth was your cat called Sir Jingles?
Curiously,
Martin
From: SirKnight
Hi Martin,
Okay, okay, all compliments stopping now. I’d thought of one about your hair, but I promise to keep it to myself.
I’m sorry you don’t get on with your brother. I was lucky that no one had a bad reaction when I came out, but I suppose the fact that I didn’t so much come out as wake up one morning and realise everyone had known for ages might have helped. It’s great that you get to watch your niece growing up, that must be wonderful. Are you a spoiling uncle?
I went to live with my grandparents in Surrey after Dad died (my mum died even before that), and then I lived in London for several years. I hope to stay in Dartmoor permanently now – I have done a lot of work on the house – but who knows. Have you always lived in Fitton, or are you originally from a less sheep-filled region?
The people I got Sir Jingles from had a little girl who told me his name was Mr Jingles. She was so sad that they had to give the kittens away, it seemed like the least I could was to keep the name. After a few days he made it clear to me that he felt cats were the superior species and should be treated as such. He would give me such scathing looks sometimes – “What are you doing with that stuffed mouse, you silly human? Can’t you tell it’s not the real thing?” I felt that “Sir” was more appropriate. I’d forgotten what a silly name it was, I’d grown so used to it. I lived in a flat in London for most of the time I had him, so I really couldn’t let him wander outside. But I still found lots of things to worry about, especially in the early days. In the first few weeks I couldn’t go out for more than an hour without thinking, “What if he’s getting lonely? What if he’s knocked something over? What if I didn’t give him enough water and he’s dying of thirst?” And when I came home he was usually sleeping and not caring one bit whether I was there or not. (Nostalgic reminiscences of an obsessive cat owner. Sorry about that.)
Do you get a day off today when you had a working weekend? What do you get up to?
Henry
From: SupremeCommander
Hi Henry,
God, you really had it rough when you were a kid. I'm so sorry. I don't really know what to say, but I hope you're all right.
I'm not sure why everyone was surprised when I came out. I'm hardly the epitome of straightness! I stayed in the closet for quite a while because I knew what sort of reaction I'd get from Dad and Simon. Dad did come round to it eventually – or he stopped calling people “poofters”, which was much the same thing from him.
The concept of weekends doesn't really exist for me. I lose track of days (and what time zone I'm in) quite frequently. I often try to go food shopping only to find everything closed because it's a Sunday, when I was convinced it was Wednesday. I didn't do much today: some cleaning, some reading – nothing interesting. We're flying to Cairo in a couple of days, so I'll have to stock up on sun-cream. I burn ludicrously easily, as you might expect.
I feel that Elsie is the only person in the world who may ever consider me “cool”, so I do try to be a bit of a spoiling uncle. Of course, at her age being “cool” just means that I give her piggy back rides and play with her stuffed toys with her. But I'll take what I can get! In a few years I will no doubt be “embarrassing Uncle Martin” instead.
I grew up in Wokingham, which is a lovely town but quite dull, although there are less sheep. Caitlin still lives there, so I go back fairly often. I moved to Fitton about ten years ago now, and will be here for the foreseeable future.
It sounds as though Sir Jingles had you well and truly wrapped around his little finger. Well, paw. I always think that cats see people as filthy interlopers in their perfect cat world. If they ever have an uprising, we'll be the first against the wall. Although perhaps they'll spare you, since you were clearly a good pet for Sir Jingles. Do you always worry so much? I'm a constant worrier, I can't do anything without panicking about how it's going to go horribly wrong. I'm getting better at not worrying when the plane makes bizarre noises though, since she tends to give us warnings for no reason whatsoever. The ground proximity warning tends to go off at odd moments, like when we're flying at 35,000 feet, or when we're actually parked and on the ground. Sorry, it seems that I talk about the bloody plane the same way people talk about their pets. I'm not actually crazy, I promise. Maybe you should get another cat though, you seem to really like them! Get a kitten – kittens are cute.
Have you had any luck with finding work? I hope so!
Martin
P.S. I think I'm going to delete this stupid profile. My e-mail address is cpt_crieff@gmail.com :)
Chapter Text
Tuesday 20th March
But I liked your profile
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
to me
Hi Martin,
It’s fine. I mean, it’s not, obviously, but as fine as it gets. I’m a lot better now than I used to be. Whether it qualifies as “all right”… I don’t know. I have a therapist, and so far she hasn’t told me that I’m far too sane for her to waste her time with me. Which probably isn’t something you wanted to know. You can just ignore it.
I’m sorry if this is inappropriate, but – are you sure that your plane is safe? I assume that you wouldn’t be there if it wasn’t, but all those false alarms seem a bit worrying. What kind of plane is it? And please talk about it as much as you like, I don’t mind!
I do worry a lot, yes. Mostly for no reason at all. I must have got that from my grandmother, she always fretted over me so much.
I think cats are unlikely to have an uprising as long as we lowly humans remain at our rightful place and provide food and cuddles at the right moment for them, which is of course likely to be the most inopportune moment for us. :) You might be right and I should get a kitten. The house is way too empty. I hope Sir Jingles in cat heaven won’t feel like I’m cheating on him.
All adult relatives have to go through a stage of being “embarrassing” in a child’s eyes, I think, but it’ll pass. A few years after that you’ll be back to being cool again. And you’ll have the advantage of not being the one who tells her to do her homework or turn off the telly and go to sleep, which will always put you a bit closer to the “cool” category :)
I got a phone call from a potential client just this morning. I’m going to see him tomorrow. It might be just a consultation, but it’s better than nothing – I’m itching for something to do.
You should go to the Egyptian Museum when you’re in Cairo. But you probably don’t have time for sightseeing, do you? Don’t forget sunglasses! I always forget mine.
Henry
I'm sure you did, but I was getting very weird messages
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Hi Henry,
I can't imagine how something like that could be fine, really. It was a bit of a silly question. I don't think you should be... embarrassed or whatever about seeing a therapist. There's nothing wrong with getting someone to help you deal with things, especially something like losing your parents – it doesn't make you insane. I think the stigma against therapy is the same stigma that says you can't show any emotion at all, for anything, ever, and that's ridiculous. I'm... touched that you felt you could tell me, and I hope it's helping you even a little bit.
GERTI is a Lockheed McDonnell 312. There are hardly any of them still flying, so it's still quite exciting to pilot one! She is perfectly airworthy, however many of her warning lights decide to go off at random intervals. She always passes her safety checks and everything, and nothing vital ever breaks on her. We exaggerate the state she's in quite continually – I'm not actually going to die a fiery death over the Atlantic any time soon, don't worry.
Maybe you should go to a cat medium and get Sir Jingles' permission to move on. What sort of kitten would you get? Do you go for the long-haired pure breeds that look as though they should be sat on a velvet cushion all day, or would a regular old tabby cat do?
I need to get some new sunglasses – mine broke on a trip to Spain. I admit to making another attempt towards coolness and getting some aviator shades. Douglas' jokes about them lasted for about two weeks after that.
We don't often get to sightsee much on trips, but occasionally we'll have a bit of time in the evening when it's an overnight stay. I've been to the Egyptian Museum before, and it was really interesting, though it did spark one of Arthur's obsessions. He'll occasionally take an interest in something and not stop until he has learnt everything about it, and that time it was Ancient Egypt, particularly all the grisly old practices. I have to say, the Museum was more interesting than the pyramids, which were a huge disappointment.
Have you travelled much? Clearly you've been to Cairo, but where else have you been? I'm glad you've got a client, I hope it works out!
Martin
Tell me who sent them and I’ll deal with them
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
to me
Hi Martin,
I am not embarrassed about it. Or, well, I guess I am, a little. But I’m not ashamed. It just isn’t very… appealing. It’s something people would rather not have to deal with (which is understandable, of course), so I don’t talk about it much. It’s easier to say it to a stranger.
Glad to hear that your plane is just messing with you and there’s nothing seriously wrong with it. I googled the type and it does seem pretty rare, you must be glad you have the opportunity to fly it! I imagine your clients are usually the kind of people like the whiskey-drinking Welsh chap who don’t want mix with the lesser mortals on regular flights?
I hope a medium won’t be necessary – Sir Jingles can always show his wrath by rattling the cupboard doors or something. He was a “regular old tabby cat”, although I doubt he would have minded having a velvet cushion. I think I’ll just go to Cats Protection in Exeter and see what they’ve got. I’m afraid I might be getting a bit too excited about this.
Have you been to the Valley of the Kings? The tombs there are much more like what I imagined the inside of the Pyramids to be like – no stuffy dark corridors. I travelled quite a bit in my late teens and early twenties. (Now in my old age I’m obviously just settling down with cats.) I’ve seen half of Europe while backpacking with friends. Outside of Europe and Egypt I’ve been to Thailand, and Toronto a couple of times, because that’s where Jenny’s family live. Once we did a road trip to New York via Niagara Falls and Boston and so on. I suppose one of the perks of being an airline captain is that you’ve seen half the world while getting paid for it. :) Do you ever travel just for pleasure?
Things worked out well with the clients, so I’ll be designing an orangery for them. I think I might have a little drink to celebrate.
In my opinion aviator shades are a great choice! Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
Henry
Do you have a secret double-life as a gun-for-hire?
From me
To Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Hi Henry,
I didn't mean to suggest that you were ashamed. I'm sorry if it came across that way – I can put my foot in my mouth at times. If you need to get anything off your chest, then you can always e-mail it to me. If it would help, I mean. I'm not trying to seem pushy or nosy, I just... thought I'd offer.
I'm glad your job is working out! I just had to Google what an orangery was – I thought it was like an orchard, and I was very puzzled as to why an architect was designing somewhere to grow trees. Shows what I know! Don't design it after your drink, it might look like an M.C. Escher orangery.
We're flying out to Cairo tomorrow afternoon and flying back on Thursday evening, so we have quite a lot of the day in-hand. Unfortunately the Valley of the Kings is nowhere near Cairo, so we might just have to go and have yet another look at Tutankhamun’s mask. I’ll probably spend a lot of time somewhere shady and cool and trying to avoid people who try to sell me things or touch my hair.
Goodness, you've travelled a lot! People would imagine that a pilot would be extremely well-travelled, and my passport would back up that tale, but we don't get much of a chance to experience the countries we visit. I mean, I could tell you a great deal about how Mexican airports differ from Japanese airports, if that counts for anything? I don't remember the last time I travelled for pleasure, if I ever did – do family holidays to Wales count? I'm not sure they do. I love flying around the world, it's really incredible, but it's not the same as travelling.
Road trips and backpacking sound like so much fun, I bet you had an amazing time. Where was your favourite place? I think that's something you almost have to do in your late teens or early twenties – I'm pushing mid-thirty now, so there's not much hope for it. Though you're only just into the thirties, you still have three years of adventure in you by my standards. You're not quite at the doddery, crazy cat man stage yet, surely?
Our clients vary. We do quite a lot of cargo flights which are quite fun because we don't have to deal with passengers, so we can make games out of our cabin addresses (like who can fit the most Hitchcock film titles into their cabin address, or who can do theirs in the form of a song. I think that one's quite unfair: I'm not a bad singer, but Douglas is trained. Still, I give it a good go.) A lot of our passengers now are for a Russian yacht broker who hires us a great deal, so lots of incredibly rich, entitled people whose biggest worry in life is whether their yacht is the biggest they can buy. (God, that sounds bitter. Sorry.)
Anyway, I'd best go pack – and I got some new aviator shades today, so I'm steeling myself for the barrage of insults that will fly my way tomorrow. I shall try to rise above them.
Have a lovely evening.
Martin
P.S. You should be excited! Kittens are exciting! Send pictures when you get one :)
It wouldn’t be a secret if I told you
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Hi Martin,
You didn’t say anything wrong, don’t worry. I think I just needed to remind myself of that. And you’re not being pushy or nosy at all. Thank you for the offer.
No shame in not knowing what an orangery is – they only started becoming popular fairly recently. Everyone’s bored with conservatories now. I would never attempt to design anything after drinking, I’ll have you know – I am extremely professional like that. I mean, I do work in my pyjamas sometimes, but surely nobody has to know that.
Family holidays in Wales do count, if you enjoyed them. I never had a family holiday, so it doesn’t sound all that bad to me. Backpacking was a lot of fun, although I spent most of the time standing awkwardly in the background while everyone else was making new friends everywhere we went. And of course I always went back home early because I wanted to be with my cat. It’s hard to choose a favourite place… I think it will have to be a little cove in Vaxholm (a tiny town not far from Stockholm) because that’s where I got together with my first boyfriend (I told you I was a softie).
I might not be doddery quite yet, but I don’t think I can dispute the crazy – here I am, emailing a charming airline captain who for some inexplicable reason finds it worth his time to write back, and all I do is talk about cats and therapists. That doesn’t sound very reasonable to me. And to be honest, I don’t want any adventures anymore. I’ve had more than enough adrenaline. Now I just want a simple, quiet life.
What is the record for the most Hitchcock references in one cabin address? I think you should try that with passengers too – it would make them more interested in what you’re saying, I’m sure. I must admit I never listened very carefully to cabin addresses, but I’ll pay more attention the next time I fly somewhere, just in case other pilots play similar games!
From what you’ve said about Douglas, it seems that he will make fun of just about anything. Whatever he says about your aviator shades, I don’t think you should take it seriously. I’m sure you look great in them.
Enjoy your flight (is that a weird thing to say to a pilot? It probably is) and your day in Cairo! Don’t let anyone touch your hair. (Unless it’s someone you want to touch your hair, of course.)
Henry
Wednesday 21st March
Greetings from Cairo - Es-Salāmu-`Alēku!
From me
To Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Izayak Henry,
And that's my knowledge of Arabic exhausted. Oh well!
We made it to Cairo with minimal fuss, apart from Arthur setting fire to the microwave in the galley. One thing you do not want to happen when you're flying a metal cupboard filled with oxygen is for it to be set on fire. He did manage to put the fire out, luckily, though I think he managed to cover himself in foam more than the fire. We're in a very seedy hotel just outside Heliopolis, though it does have wifi. I've nicked Arthur's laptop for a few minutes before we go and find something edible.
Working in your pyjamas? You should be ashamed. It's a slippery slope from there to working under the influence of alcohol, everybody knows that.
My strongest memories of camping in Wales involve getting rained on, and Simon throwing mud at me. I'm sure they weren't all that bad, I'm afraid I have the bad habit of fixating on things that go wrong – backpacking was probably much better. I completely know what you mean about feeling awkward whilst everyone else manages to interact with people. How do they do that? What's the trick? I'm my own worst enemy when it comes to situations like that though, because I can't stand the inevitable silences, so I just babble nonsensically and make a right fool of myself. In my head I'm witty and interesting, but it never quite works like that.
I've never been to Vaxholm, but I do like Stockholm. Sweden is a lovely country. And you are clearly an enormous sap – did you meet the boyfriend on holiday, or was he in your group of friends? How long were you together? (Ignore these questions if they're intrusive – I can never tell.)
Hm, I think I'm going to have to agree with you on your diagnosis of 'crazy', because I am certainly not charming. Not in the slightest. And it's not exactly a hardship to e-mail you. Your e-mails are one of the highlights of my days :) And I like that you talk about cats. It's better than me talking about planes.
Douglas had an excellent Hitchcock cabin address last year when he got to thirteen, which was rather impressive. Though he did do it on passengers and one of them was really unimpressed. My record is ten Audrey Hepburn film titles, which I'm still rather proud of. Today we had to do cabin addresses “in the style of”. I think my Bertie Wooster was quite good, what? It won me the brie from the cheese tray, anyway.
Nothing wrong with wanting a quiet life. I know our MJN adventures sound exciting but I'd much rather have incident-free flights where everything goes right. I don't generally enjoy the ridiculous situations that we get into, and I'm just glad when we get out of them in one piece. Really, my ideal life is to be able to fly, but with everything else being simple and quiet and comfortable. There isn't really much of an 'everything else' at the moment because I just work all the time. I don't know how people manage to fit in 'having a life'.
God, I've just realised that I sound quite miserable in that paragraph. I've got my dream job and I get to go to all sorts of amazing places, I really shouldn't moan. Ignore me.
Maybe I should take a picture of me in my shades, then you can judge for yourself. It's not too hot here in March but I'll still manage to burn and go even more freckly, so I'm sure it'll be a good look...
Anyway, I can hear my name being bellowed from nearby so I should go. Have a good day!
Martin
Unoriginal English greetings from England
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Hi Martin,
I thought airline pilots only ever stayed in nice hotels. Don’t tell me the air of glamour that surrounds the job isn’t based on reality?
Don’t you sometimes have the feeling that there is some kind of secret communication seminar that everyone has gone to but somehow you never got the invitation? I often feel that way.
Jake was one of the friends I travelled with. We’d been making eyes for quite some time before the trip, but it ended up being not much more than a summer romance. We were together only for six weeks, but it gave me some very nice memories. None of my relationships have been exactly long-lasting anyway.
I think that we’ll have to agree on a compromise – you talking about planes is neither better nor worse than me talking about cats. How does that sound? I’ll stand behind my opinion that you’re charming unless you prove me otherwise, though.
Why anyone would be unimpressed by thirteen Hitchcock films in one cabin address is beyond me. Or ten Audrey Hepburn ones, for that matter. Clearly that passenger had no sense of humour. Do you always compete for cheese, or are there other prizes too?
It’s quite understandable to want more from life than just a job, even when it’s your dream job. You shouldn’t feel bad for wanting something completely natural. I wonder, though – you say you work all the time, but you obviously have free days between flights. I can’t imagine how a pilot could take work home. Do you have some kind of … pilot meetings or something? It just seems to me that captain, even in an airdot, should have time for more than just work. I realise it’s none of my business, of course, you don’t have to tell me anything.
A picture of you in shades seems like a very good idea to me – I’ve already told you that I like freckles. But you can wait until the sunburn disappears if you like :)
I hope you had a nice dinner!
Henry
Thursday 22nd March
Sabah el kheer (that means “good morning” apparently!)
From me
To Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Good morning!
I think if I had been invited to that secret communication seminar I would have had some sort of crisis or panic about being in a room with lots of strangers and avoided it anyway.
A summer romance sounds nice! I've never had one of those so it sounds wonderfully idealistic to me. Join the club of “no long-lasting relationships”, though. We have cheese and biscuits, and enough tea to drown a buffalo.
Compromise accepted – a cat for a plane doesn't sound very equal, but I'll take it. I have some cat-related plane stories that could fit the theme. When it comes to competitions it's usually the cheese tray at stake, or the puddings, or who has to share their hotel room with Arthur and his hideous snoring. I am a chronic loser (honestly, don't statistics say you should win at least some coin tosses? Statistics are not my friend), so I usually end up with less cheese, the strudel, and sharing with Arthur.
If I worked for Air England or something then I'd probably get to stay in a nice posh hotel, but unfortunately our budget doesn't usually stretch to that. Carolyn keeps the purse-strings very tight, and usually it's either our hotel rooms or our food that suffers. I'm afraid that our company is very small and not exactly successful – we're lucky to stay afloat from month-to-month. It's slightly better now that the yacht broker hires us regularly, but we're still teetering on the brink of bankruptcy more often than is comfortable. Not all that glamorous, I'm afraid. The purse-strings are rather tight around our pay as well, so I'm not exactly... well-off. I'm sorry if I gave you a rather misleading impression... It's not exactly what I imagined working at an airline to be like, but it's worth it to be able to fly.
I'll see what I can do about the picture, though it will be truly, spectacularly awkward. It would probably win some sort of awkwardness prize. If I do it, I want a picture in return. It can be part of the compromise.
All right, I'm off to have a look around the beautiful buildings of Heliopolis that we aren't allowed inside. Talk to you later :)
Martin
Meow!
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Hi Martin!
Sorry about replying slightly later than usual– I’ve been a bit busy getting started with the orangery, and getting the house ready for my new housemate. He’s ginger like you, ten weeks old and likes chewing on things. I think I’m going to call him Oscar. He’s very playful and not shy at all. I thought it’d take me longer to choose a kitten and have everything ready, but I couldn’t resist when I saw him! He’s so adorable. I think we’re meant to be. I’ll need to put up some kind of cat fence so that Mrs Baker’s cats can’t get in the garden anymore. He could catch something from them.
Would it count if I sent you a picture of him rather than me? Probably not. Oh well, have one anyway. He’s much more adorable and much less awkward than me. Should I wear sunglasses too? I have a wide choice of them – I always have to buy a new pair everywhere I go.
I suppose summer romances are idealistic by definition, and that’s why they never last. But tea and cheese and biscuits are good too! :)
What’s wrong with strudel? I think strudel is delicious. Especially with whipped cream. I’m sorry about your bad luck, though. I’m sure it will turn soon and you’ll have a long winning streak to make up for all the losses. It has to – statistics don’t lie. In the meantime maybe you could invest in some earplugs. They were a godsend when my neighbours in London had a newborn baby. And I’m sorry your company isn’t doing very well – that must be very stressful. I really hope things get better for you soon. But you seem to enjoy working there, and that’s what matters.
Oscar has come to investigate the mysterious clacking noises the keyboard makes. Apparently it’s very fascinating. I think he’d like to say hi to you. What are your cat-related plane stories? Maybe he’d like to hear them. It could be inspirational for him to hear about important cats that get to fly planes. (Sorry. I’ll start talking like a sane person soon, I promise.)
I hope your flight back home was fine!
Henry
Hello Oscar, my fellow ginger!
From me
To Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Hi Henry and Oscar,
Oscar is incredibly cute. I might have made a squeaking noise when I saw the picture, but don't tell anyone. I have an image to uphold. Good choice on the ginger as well, it's a seriously underrated colour. I hope you manage to keep him out of mischief, and don't worry too much about him! Though I think you now owe me a picture of both of you in sunglasses.
I'm sending this from Croatia where we landed to refuel, except now they've got two runway closures so we're stuck for a bit. Douglas has gone to chat up a couple of hosties and Arthur is hunting for Toblerones, so I've nicked his laptop again. He's not asked why I'm suddenly using his laptop on trips, he just blithely agrees. Good old Arthur.
I don't mind decent strudel, but aeroplane strudel is really quite revolting. Rather like eating cardboard with some sort of mush that was possibly an apple in a previous life. And whipped cream is something of a luxury. Though I now have a craving for real strudel, thanks for that.
I do actually use earplugs when Arthur's snoring gets particularly bad. I have an inner-ear abnormality so sometimes they come in handy if that's playing up. Unfortunately, I think Arthur's snores can register quite highly on the Richter scale so they don't help that much.
Maybe one day my karma will pay up and I'll win the lottery, or Daniel Craig will chuck Rachel Weisz and sweep me off my feet, or I'll get offered a job for Air Force One. Or something. I'm not holding out much hope, though – I'll settle for winning the occasional word game.
Okay, cat-related plane story: a client of ours had moved to Abu Dhabi, so we flew out all of his belongings, including his cat. Said cat was not adorable like Oscar. It was a completely psychopathic, crazy cat that thought it was a leopard. Arthur tried to play with it and he ended up with open wounds. Anyway, we were a couple of hours into our trip – which Douglas was referring to as “Scrooge McDuck Air” because Carolyn had threatened us with disembowelment should we divert or break anything or do anything at all that would cost her money – and we realised that the thermostat in the hold was off. Obviously it gets very, very, very cold at 35,000 feet, so we had a bit of a dilemma: do we divert and cost Carolyn thousands and thousands of pounds and risk her causing us actual bodily harm, or do we just carry on and hope somehow that the cat doesn't freeze to death?
Eventually (and don't tell anyone this, it's a trade secret), Douglas decided that we could “smell smoke in the flight deck” (meaning he lit a match. Why he had matches I don't know), which meant that we could divert with immediate priority and Carolyn couldn't be too furious with us. She did shout quite a lot when we got back, but we kept our jobs and Psycho Cat lived to fight another day.
So, Oscar, this is the moral of the story: if you're flying on a plane, don't attack the crew or they may consider letting you freeze to death.
Okay, the picture I promised you isn't quite what I promised. Arthur took the photo before I'd put the shades on, and then proceeded to drop and break the camera. So you have a picture of me looking very scruffy, not really paying attention, with sunglasses that I'm not wearing. Sorry about that.
Good luck with the orangery, and have fun with Oscar!
Martin
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Friday 23rd March
Dobar dan! (Finally I don’t have to feel inadequate about my language skills)
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Hi Martin,
Don’t worry, your squeaky secret is safe with me, as are your questionable trade secrets. To be honest, I don’t think anyone could react with dignity when seeing Oscar for the first time. I am going to worry about him too much, though, there’s no doubt about that.
I make wonderfully tasty strudel, if I do say so myself. I’ll make one just for you if you’re ever in the neighbourhood. :)
Daniel Craig, hmm? Not a bad choice! You never try to chat up flight attendants? One of them might look a bit like James Bond and have a (completely understandable) weakness for shy ginger men in uniform. (Ginger isn’t an underrated colour just on cats, as the enlightened of us know.)
Why don’t you let Arthur have the single room and you share with Douglas? Everyone could have a good night’s sleep that way, but then you would have one thing less to compete for, which I suppose might be a drawback.
Clearly Oscar can fly on a plane anytime without problems then, since he would never dream of attacking anyone. He’ll grow up to be a good-natured and well-brought-up cat. Obviously. I’ll wait with telling him that story until he’s a bit older, though, it could scare his little kitten soul now. A psycho cat imprisoned in a freezing metal box, that belongs well after the watershed. And besides, he’s already asleep – he had lots of exploring to do today in his new home, it must have tired him.
Does none of you know how to take pictures with a mobile phone? I feel robbed of my aviator shades picture. Not that I don’t like the one you sent, because I absolutely do! Lovely sideburns! Also, um, lovely bit of exposed neck, if you don’t mind me saying. The one I’m sending you is an older one, but I am wearing sunglasses! I chose it because I’m there with Sir Jingles – it wouldn’t be fair if I only sent you pictures of Oscar.
I hope you got out of Croatia all right! It’s a beautiful country, but the airports are nothing special.
Henry
Finally back on British soil
From me
To Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Hi Henry,
We escaped Croatia in the end – hurray! Now I'm here until a trip to Spain the day after tomorrow.
I'll hold you to that strudel. I'm not a great cook, but I do make a mean chocolate brownie. Maybe we can switch – though it might have to be balanced out with something healthier.
If you ever have the dubious pleasure of seeing me chat someone up you will realise why I never attempt it. I fluctuate wildly between nervous babbling and horrible stammering so I can't even get a word out. Then I'll accidentally threaten to stalk them or something equally ridiculous. (I've never stalked anyone, just to reassure you.) Unfortunately there aren't many men who like the combination of shy and ginger. Douglas claims that my uniform is “wasted” on me.
Sharing hotel rooms is rather beneath Douglas' dignity, unless there is absolutely no choice. And it may seem silly, but competing over the most pointless things does make the time go faster on flights.
I hope Oscar is sleeping well. If Oscar is going to be a perfect gentleman then I would be more than happy to fly him to a destination of his choice. I'll even triple check the thermostat in the hold so he'll be warm rather than frozen into a block of ice. Psycho Cat was not impressed, I can tell you that.
Um, thank you? I always debate about whether to keep the sideburns, but I've had them for ages and I'm used to them. I think you've repaid my exposed neck (your preferences continue to be very odd) with your exposed arms and legs. Um. (God, I'll send this and immediately regret that bit. Sorry, sorry, sorry.) Sir Jingles looks very comfortable – is he wearing a ribbon round his neck?
I am completely technologically inept. My phone only just manages to send texts – there's no point in me getting anything fancier because I would just be hopeless with it. It's a miracle I can even send you images via e-mail – I was really proud when I worked out how. Arthur had left his phone at the hotel at that point, and that was the only time I was wearing the glasses. Sorry! I have found some old pictures from when we spent Christmas in Molokai last year, though they're a bit small. If you squint then you can see that I am wearing aviators. I beg your forgiveness for a) the shorts, b) the shorts/shirt combination and c) the hat. I wasn't too keen on burning to a crisp, so I sacrificed my pride, and saved everyone from my skinny, pasty self.
Have you been up to anything beyond playing with a kitten and designing an orangery? Though that does sound like a rather lovely day!
Martin
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Welcome! We have tea
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Hi Martin,
Mmm, brownies. Sounds like a good trade-off! We’re obviously going to have a very healthy main course. A grilled fish and vegetables or something. I really enjoy cooking, but it’s not so fun when there’s no one to cook for, so usually I don’t bother and just knock up something simple. I don’t want to become that person who forces leftovers on his neighbours.
Oscar sleeps well, so that’s at least one of us. He’s decided that my bed is much better than his, so now I can’t sleep because I keep worrying I’ll roll over on him or kick him. Sir Jingles sometimes slept in my bed too, but he only started doing it when he was big enough that I didn’t have to worry about accidentally smothering him. Oscar evidently sees no danger in sleeping next to someone almost a hundred times heavier than him. He also thinks I’m very boring because I don’t want to get up in the middle of the night to play with him. But what can I do? I don’t know how to refuse an adorable creature that wants to share my bed. Hopefully he’ll learn to keep to his side of the bed, and to entertain himself with one of the many toys I’m spoiling him with when he decides it’s time for a nocturnal adventure.
If you’re taking votes, I’m definitely pro-sideburns. And rest assured that there is nothing odd about my preferences at all. In fact, they’re a sign of a very good taste. Sir Jingles is indeed wearing a ribbon in the picture – it was his birthday, so he wanted to dress up.
What was it like, spending Christmas on a beach? Good to see you had enough time to enjoy local nature! (Though not so good that you had to work at Christmas.) The pictures are too small for me to judge the aviators properly, but as far as I can tell my initial opinion – that you look great in them – isn’t very far from the truth. And don’t apologize for your clothes – isn’t that what people are supposed to wear in Hawaii?
I haven’t done much apart from working and Oscar-related antics. He keeps me occupied, but I’m certainly not complaining!
Where in Spain are you going? I hope you manage to get enough rest before you leave again.
Henry
Saturday 24th March
I don't have tea and it's making me sad
From me
To Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Hi Henry,
You're making me hungry. Stop it.
Clearly you should be at Oscar's every beck and call. I thought you'd already established that this is what cats demand? You don't need sleep, sleep is for the weak (or for those without ten-week old kittens). He's obviously already realised that you exist to serve him.
If Oscar is awake and active at night then he'll probably get out of the way of you if you nearly squash him. I'm sure he'll settle down soon enough – I suppose it's a baby thing. At least kittens keep you awake by playing rather than screaming at you. The image of a very tiny kitten having a whole side of your bed is amusing me – I bet he takes up a lot more space than he should.
We weren't meant to spend Christmas in Molokai. First off we weren't even meant to be flying anywhere, but Carolyn booked a job because “Christmas wasn't on the wall chart”. Spending it in Molokai was really quite fun in the end, though. But it wasn't very Christmassy! Arthur and I went surfing, which might be the least Christmas-like activity ever. Exciting, though! Arthur tried to get me to wear one of his Hawaiian shirts, but one thing you learn as a red-head: never wear pink.
We are Madrid-bound, and Carolyn just called me to tell me that we're actually flying out this evening rather than in the morning, which is just smashing. I had counted on another night's sleep, but I'll grab a few hours now.
Have a good day. Don't let Oscar wear you out too much!
Martin
How can you not have tea?!
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Hi Martin,
Do these last minute changes happen often to you? It seems so. I hope you got enough sleep at least. You have a right for it, since you don’t have a kitten. :)
Oscar doesn’t even want a whole side of the bed, I just want him to stay at a safe distance – I can be a very restless sleeper. You’re right that soon he’ll settle down and learn to keep himself busy without waking me. It will be nice to have the company when I wake up and can’t fall back asleep, which happens more often than I’d like.
(I’m sorry if I’m boring you with all the cat talk. I know we agreed on a compromise, but it seems that so far you haven’t talked about planes nearly as much as I have about cats. It’s just that my days are pretty much one like the other, which I am actually grateful for, but it doesn’t make for very interesting topics to write about. Just tell me if you want me to shut up.)
I hear surfing is a Christmas activity, at least if you live in Sydney. :) I’ve never tried it, but it seems like fun. I’d probably be horrible at it, though. Were you any good? I’m usually at home at Christmas, or trying not to freeze in Canada, so Hawaii seems quite exciting, even if it wasn’t a planned visit. I assume you usually visit Caitlin’s family?
Tonight is pub quiz night, which isn’t exactly my kind of thing, but I try to go and pretend I have a social life. I usually end up in a team composed largely of middle-aged women who treat me like I’m ten years old and/or slightly crazy, but at least they don’t expect me to come up with conversation topics. I expect tonight I’ll be especially useless as I’ll be worried that I’m leaving Oscar alone for too long.
I hope the trip to Madrid goes fine and that you’ll have a bit more free time after that!
Take care,
Henry
My lack of tea is like a Shakespearean tragedy.
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Hi Henry,
I'm afraid I only managed about an hour and a half of sleep – my neighbours were being very loud and kept me awake. I've got half an hour until I have to leave for the airfield though, so I thought I'd check to see if you had replied. And you have!
I suppose you've tried camomile tea and hot milk and sleeping pills and things so it's probably not worth my suggesting it. I'm sorry you struggle to sleep though, that must be rough. I have periods of time when I can't get to sleep and it really takes it out of me.
I don't want you to shut up about cats, don't worry :) I want to hear about Oscar's adventures, even if said adventures are just getting you out of bed.
I'm not bad at surfing, actually! I've done it a few times. When my inner-ear isn't messing me about I have fairly good balance. I think it's because I'm short – lower centre of gravity. Christmas in a hot country is fun but it's a little strange – Christmas is meant to be freezing cold. Or at least soggy and grey! At least you get white Christmases in Canada. I didn't mind too much about missing Christmas at home last year. I do usually go to Caitlin's, but they'd gone over to Ireland to celebrate with Tom's family, so I'd have been on my own.
I can see middle-aged women just wanting to take you under their wings. It's probably the crooked smile. Though why on earth would they think you're crazy? They always want to mother me. There's a café nearby that seems to the haunt of older women, all of whom want to feed me up and marry me off to their daughters.
I'm sure Oscar will be fine for a little while, he seems like the resourceful sort :) I might e-mail you from Madrid, otherwise I'll talk to you when I return – again. Good luck in the pub quiz, I hope you win!
Martin
Tea or no tea - that is the question
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Hi Martin,
I’m sorry about your loud neighbours. I’ll keep my fingers crossed for you to win the Arthur-free hotel room at least!
I don’t take sleeping pills because sometimes I have nightmares, and the pills make them more vivid and it takes longer to wake up. Milk and different kinds of herbal tea only help so much, but a cuppa and some light reading can be soothing after a nightmare.
We didn’t win (we were too bad at recognising 1990’s boy bands), but when I came home Oscar was very happy to see me, which more than made up for it. Then he got distracted by a moth and spent some time trying to catch it. It was absolutely adorable. Eventually the moth hid in a lampshade, which in Oscar’s opinion was completely against the rules. I managed to get it out and damaged its wings in the process, so eventually Oscar caught it. He was very proud of himself, and I got a half-chewed dead moth as an offering of love, which was very sweet, if a bit disgusting. Now he’s sleeping like a log, the hunt has completely worn him out. (End of part 2389 of Kitten Adventures)
Clearly you are a better catch than you think if mothers want you to marry their daughters, though I understand it’s not exactly the kind of attention you want. I moved back here at one of the more… difficult periods of my life, and I’m afraid I didn’t come across as a very well-adjusted individual. And I live alone in a big house and don’t talk much, which I suppose hasn’t helped my image. But oh well. There has to be someone weird in every village.
Good luck with the in-flight games!
Henry
I may hvae drunk lots fo alcchol. Srry,
From me
To Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
I'm going to reregt this tomrorow but nevre mind. I;m soi pathetic that I have to be druink befiere I can avtually say things. I'm sorry.
I don't know why you keep on e-maiuling me and sahying things like I'm charming or complimenting me. People don't like me. I don't evenb have friends apart from MJN and even they don't really like me. So whyt do you? I don't unerstand. Your'e lovely and gorgeous and clever so why are yiu talking to me?
Course you proibably wont talk to me once I tell you the truth. I'[m sorry I've not been honets with yoy. It was just nice to have someone believe me for once.
I don;t get paid to be a pilot. It;s what I always wanted to do but itt took me 7 goes to get my license so the only company that will have me ois MJN and Carolyn doesn't even pay me. It's just s stupiud hobby that takes up all my tine. I work as a man with a bloody van insread. I hardly earn anything from that, sometimes I gave to pick between rent and food. I live in an attic flat above a stuednt hoiuse. I;m a complete loser and I;ll combpletely understand if you don't email ne back after this. I'm nothing like you tihnk I am.
I really regret saying that I wasnt looking for a relationship when you emailed ne first. I look forward to your emails every day. I spends so much time thinking about thinsg I could tell you about – I won a stupid word game on the flight over and the first thing I thought was that I couldnt wait to tell you.
Your'e gorgeous, you know? And you're so lovely and I;m so sorry things havebeeen so awful for you. You don;t desreve it at all and I wish I could help. You're one of the nicest people I've ever spoken to and we haven't even spoken. I was wondering what your voice sounds like, and what it woukf be like to hold your hand or kiss you.
I;m soryr. You don;t need this and I am going to be so stupiudly embarrassed by this but it;s the only way I'll bring myself to tell you the truths and you deserve that at least. Don't feel you have to reply – I unerstand if you don;t want to. I really do.
I'm sorry.
Martin
Chapter 3
Notes:
Thank you to Bri, our lovely beta, and to all the readers for the fantastic response to this fic so far!
Chapter Text
Sunday 25th March
I might have to have a drink too
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Dear Martin,
You are not a loser. I can’t imagine taking seven goes to do anything – I’d give up after the second failed attempt. The fact that you kept trying doesn’t make you pathetic – it means you’re determined and relentless. And who would work without pay? Only someone hard-working and dedicated to his job. Those are not bad qualities, Martin. I’m very sorry that things have been so difficult for you and I think it’s horribly unfair that your boss treats you like this, but nothing you’ve written makes me think any less of you. Quite the opposite, really.
I talk to you because you’re lovely too. I don’t have a lot of friends either and I’ve been alone a lot, and talking to you is quite possibly the best thing that has happened to me in the past year. I feel like we’ve been emailing for ages, when in fact it hasn’t been very long at all. I keep checking my inbox all the time to see if you’ve replied and then I force myself to wait before I write back so as not to seem too eager (and now I’ve given myself away, but oh well). I’m so glad that you decided to write to me even though you never set up that profile.
Thank you for all the nice things you’ve said about me. In reality I’m nothing special and I have a lot of issues, but if you’ve really changed your mind about not wanting a relationship… I’m definitely still interested. Very much so. You aren’t the only one who has been thinking about kissing. (You have beautiful, full lips, do you know? I didn’t dare to mention it before, but you do.)
It’s okay if you find that what you’ve written doesn’t describe your feelings when sober. We can forget the whole thing if you want. Or rather, not the whole thing – I’d really like you to remember what I said in the first paragraph, because it’s all true and you seem to think too little of yourself and you should know that you deserve much better. But we can forget the rest. I don’t want things to become awkward.
Right. I’m going to send this off without rereading it before I panic and write something completely stupid instead. Don’t feel embarrassed (only about the spelling if you must). And congratulations on winning the word game! What was it?
I hope you’re not too terribly hung over.
Henry
Oh God I'm so sorry
From me
To Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Henry,
I am so sorry for last night. I vaguely remember writing an e-mail and I was hoping desperately that I hadn't sent it. I don't usually do things like that when drunk – if you'll believe it, I'm usually just giggly and loose-limbed. I am paying for it with a beastly hangover, but it's my own fault.
I'm... not really sure what to say. I'm frankly stunned that you'd be remotely interested in me at all, let alone when I send you ridiculous e-mails like that. I can't believe it, but... I'm interested too. Definitely. I honestly thought I'd ruined everything as I usually do when I'm interested in someone, so I'm incredibly happy that that's not the case. I'll probably be even happier once my head isn't pounding quite so much.
I'll be the judge of whether you're 'something special' or not. After everything you've told me I think you're clearly a very strong person and I won't hear otherwise. I've never been so glad that Douglas came up with a scheme to irritate me, because e-mailing you is one of the best things that's happened to me in a long time.
Um. I don't really know what to say or do now, so I'll just... end this here. I'm glad that you weren't put off by my being ridiculous.
And I am very embarrassed about my spelling. I could barely understand myself.
Have a lovely day,
Martin
P.S. The game was Films That Would Make Interesting Musicals.
Don’t be sorry
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Hi Martin,
Don’t be sorry – I’m really glad you wrote it. And I bet you are an adorable drunk. I am sorry about your hangover, though. You won’t be flying with it, will you? When are you coming back? I’m not really sure what I should be writing now – I never expected the online dating thing to go anywhere, I don’t know how it’s done! – so I’ll just carry on as normal and hope that it’s all right.
I’m just as surprised that you are interested in me, trust me. I keep grinning like a loon – poor Oscar doesn’t know what’s happening to my face. I can’t concentrate on anything. Oscar was very baffled when I accidentally put his food in a teacup. I keep thinking about you. And I’m going to shut up now before this turns horribly mushy and you change your mind.
How is your van business going? You’d tell me if you were in a bad way, wouldn’t you? I understand if you don’t want to talk about it, but I, you know. Worry. I hope you aren’t running yourself ragged.
I’ve received another job offer through a former colleague. The building in question is in a pretty dilapidated state, so there’s going to be quite a lot of work, which is good. Things seem to be picking up a bit.
You play some unusual games! How many films did you get?
I hope you’re having a quiet day and drinking lots of water!
Henry
I've drunk enough water to drown a bison
From me
To Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Going on as normal sounds fine to me – I can hopefully actually manage that!
The hangover is still pretty bad, but I'm feeling better. I think the prospect of one of Arthur's hangover cures forced me to feel better. I won't be flying with it, hopefully: we fly back tomorrow morning. It's quite nice here, the client paid more than he needed to to make up for getting his timing wrong, so we've got a fairly nice hotel.
I hope you've stopped giving Oscar his food in inappropriate dishes. Surely he should have some sort of solid-gold cat bowl to dine from?
Van business is... up-and-down. There's always a boom around September and July with students moving to and from university, and summer months tend to be okay as well. The worst time is in winter, because no one ever wants to move in the cold and rain, and I can't blame them. But I'm okay, I'm a tough nut really and I’ve learnt how to manage. Don't worry about me. Please.
So your new job is redesigning the building so it's habitable? It's excellent that you're getting more work. How goes the orangery?
I can't remember all the films I got, but I did okay. Off the top of my head my ones were: Kill Bill, The Birds, The Matrix, Schindler's List and Carrie. There were a few more, but I don't remember. We got distracted by talking about what songs would be used in Carrie, and then Arthur started talking in great detail about periods and things. That was very alarming indeed, on many, many levels.
I keep thinking about you as well. I can't seem to complete a thought process about anything else – hopefully I'll be able to concentrate better tomorrow morning. No offence intended, of course. Is it weird to miss someone you've never met? We e- mail just as much when I'm away but I still have this odd sensation of missing you.
Have a good day – apparently the weather back in Britain is gorgeous, so I hope you get to enjoy some of it. Say hi to Oscar for me.
Martin
Monday 26th March
I might be failing at the “normal” bit
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
I think a solid-gold cat bowl might be exactly according to Oscar’s taste, but I’m afraid he’ll have to settle for a stainless steel one. (I know, that’s very mean of me, isn’t it?)
I want to kiss your forehead to make the headache go away. I know it wouldn’t actually work, but I like imagining that it would. (Apparently my new aim in life is to convince you I’m completely soft in the head.) I will do my best not to worry about you excessively, but I can’t promise miracles. Worrying is what I do, after all. Why did you decide to become a man with a van, of all things? Not that the thought doesn’t lead to, um, some very nice mental images, but it must wear you out.
The orangery is progressing nicely – the clients are fairly undemanding and don’t want anything too difficult, and they only want the plans and nothing further, so my work is very close to done there. The next job is a large residential house that the owner wants converted into flats (apart from making sure it doesn’t fall apart). It’s not my favourite kind of job – I prefer dealing with people who’ll be actually living there once it’s done, but now is not a good time to turn down offers and it will look good in my portfolio. Plus it’s one of the nicer buildings I’ve worked on, and it’s such a shame that they let get to such a state.
I’m having a lot of fun imagining your chosen films as musicals. Those that I’ve seen, at least – I must admit I’ve never seen The Birds, which I’ve gathered is some kind of sin, but I’m not very fond of horror films where animals attack people. Or horror films in general, but those especially.
Maybe it is weird, but I miss you too. And I was thinking… maybe we could meet up sometime, when you have a day off? Or not, of course, if it’s too soon. Is it too soon? Maybe it is, I don’t know. I just know I’d really like to meet you properly. But I’m a very patient man, so don’t worry about it if you don’t want to quite yet. I just thought I’d suggest it.
Oscar says meow to you. We’ve both been enjoying the nice weather, but him especially – he likes sleeping in the sun.
Have a good flight back!
Henry
This is still the most normal conversation I've ever had. If that helps.
From me
To Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
You're clearly a very mean cat owner. Honestly, you should be ashamed. I'm glad to hear that Oscar's been enjoying the sun, at least.
Um, I don't think you seem soft in the head. Or if you are, I quite like you being soft in the head if that's the sort of thing you want to do. And you never know, it might make the headache go away. It would be worth a try, at least.
The van belonged to my dad. He was an electrician, and he wanted me to be the same. Simon and Caitlin went to Uni and were off being brilliant in banking and publishing respectively, and Dad never exactly encouraged the piloting. When he died he left me the van so... yeah. It's not the most inspiring story. I'm not sure what mental images you're having, but they probably have nothing to do with reality.
But you really don't need to worry about me, I promise. I don't want you to do that.
I suppose when you convert a building into flats everything is very... samey, without any real personality to it. At least the building is nice though, so you'll be making it better! And maybe once you've got going with new projects you'll get more of the type you're looking for? Have you ever turned projects down for any reason, or are there not enough of them to make that an option?
I have no idea if it's too soon, but I would... really like that. To meet you properly, I mean. I'd suggest talking on the phone first, but I think I'm actually worse at talking on the phone than I am face-to-face so... And anyway, it doesn't feel too soon, not to me. I can find out my schedule and let you know? (I'm a bit shaky and giddy at this prospect. I don't think I've ever taken so long over a paragraph.)
We're about to head back to the airport, so I'll speak to you when I'm back on British soil. Hopefully it'll be blue skies and sun all the way!
(Still miss you.)
Martin
I have made it up to Oscar by letting him appropriate my favourite scarf
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Just so you don’t get the wrong idea: I would like to kiss your forehead regardless of whether or not you have a headache. Actually, I’d much rather do it when you don’t have a headache, because… I don’t want you to have a headache, obviously. And not just your forehead, too.
I’m glad you didn’t become an electrician. That would have been a shame. I’m sorry your dad didn’t encourage your dreams, that must have been tough for you. From what you’ve told me, it doesn’t sound like you had an easy relationship. (Sorry if I’m jumping to conclusions, or if I’m being intrusive.)
I’m sorry if it came across like I don’t believe you can take care of yourself or something like that. I don’t think anything of that sort, of course, and I realise you don’t need me mother henning you. Sorry. I won’t bring it up again.
Luckily I can afford to turn down jobs that I think would do more harm than good to the property, or if it’s just not very interesting. Or if I don’t like the clients – I can usually tell at the first meeting if they’re going to be hard to work with, and I don’t need someone who’s going to breath down my neck all the time because they think I’m secretly trying to waste their money or something. Flats can’t have much personality in a huge tower block, of course, but here it’s just going to be four to six flats, depending on what we’ll agree on, so there’s still potential for each of them being unique. I usually imagine fictional future inhabitants if I don’t have real ones to work with. There’s going to be an attic flat, so I might pretend it’s for an airline captain :)
“Giddy” is precisely how my therapist described me this morning. (I hope you don’t mind I told her about you. I tell her most things, but I understand if it makes you uncomfortable.) I’m not very good at talking on the phone either, although I’d probably enjoy talking to you. Definitely let me know once you find out when you’re free, I should be able to arrange my schedule around that. I hope it’s soon. And I haven’t forgotten about the strudel!
(Still miss you too. Even more now that I know you’re getting closer.)
Henry
Tuesday 27th March
I hope it was a silk scarf.
From me
To Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
I am on board with any and all ideas related to kissing, whether I have a headache or not. Which I don't any more, thankfully.
I'm glad I didn't become an electrician as well. I might have had more money, but I think I would have been miserable. Unfortunately I never got to prove my dad wrong – he died before I got my license. We didn't have an easy relationship, but I don't hate him or anything. We were too different I think, and we didn't see eye-to-eye on... anything. But he wanted the best for me, really. It just so happened that what he thought was best wasn't what I wanted. It's okay, honestly.
It didn't come across like that at all! I'm just used to being a bit defensive, so I tend to jump down people's throats a bit. I'm sorry about that. But I really don't want you to worry, that's all. How about I promise to tell you if I'm having a hard time, would that help?
It must be great to be in a position where you can decide what you do and who you work for. I bet some clients could be absolutely ridiculous. I swear some people live in an entirely different universe to the rest of us. Remind me to tell you about the crazy Polish bassoonist who thought we were trying to kill her with cheesecake. That was a fun trip.
Who are your other fictional future inhabitants? Give my fictional self good neighbours, please. No screaming children or barking dogs. Or people who play heavy metal at two in the morning. Is the attic flat going to have a skylight?
Of course I don't mind you talking to your therapist about me. So long as you only say nice things, of course. I hope she approves of me.
My mobile is 0778485295 if you wanted to... text. Or call. I actually think I have this weekend free – is that okay? It's fine if that's too short notice. I'll have to write it on the wallchart: “MARTIN IS BUSY OKAY?” It doesn't usually work, but still. And I am very much looking forward to the strudel.
I can't wait.
Martin
Just a woollen one, but he loves it
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
I’m very happy that your headache is gone, and especially that you agree with my kissing plans. They are many and varied.
This weekend sounds marvellous! There’s nothing like short notice in this case. I bet your smile is even lovelier in reality. I can’t wait to see you, even though a part of me is terrified that I won’t live up to your expectations. We can meet somewhere halfway, or I can drive to Fitton if that’s more convenient for you? You don’t have a nut allergy or something, do you? I wouldn’t like to accidentally poison you with the strudel.
I’m sorry you and your dad didn’t get a chance to sort things out. I’m sure he would have been glad that you have a job that makes you happy.
That promise does help, thanks :)
The attic flat is going to have several skylights. Is that a good thing? Does your flat have one? I haven’t thought about your fictional neighbours yet, but let’s see… There’s most likely going to be a three-bedroom flat on the ground floor, so I’m thinking a family with two children (past the screaming age, don’t worry. Although some people never grow out of the screaming age). The children play some musical instruments, but they’re on the ground floor so it won’t bother your fictional self. On the first floor there’s going to be at least one small one-bedroom flat. A young woman with a very stressful job lives there on her own. I think she has a little crush on you, which is unfortunate for her but more than understandable. The rest of the layout is still undecided, so I’ll introduce you to your remaining neighbours later :)
Of course I only say nice things about you. So far I’m not aware of any non-nice ones. Dr Mortimer thinks it’s terrific that I’m… attempting to be seeing someone. She probably has a feeling of deep compassion for you and hopes you have strong nerves, but of course she wouldn’t tell me that.
Apparently there are some annoying days between today and Saturday. I find their existence entirely unnecessary. I hope they pass quickly!
Henry
From: +447700900389
Dear Captain Crieff, your personal bakery would like to know if you like raisins in your strudel.
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Dear Mr Knight, Baker Extraordinaire, I would very much like raisins in my strudel. And I don't have any allergies, so you're safe from any unexpected poisoning charges.
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
A strudel with raisins it is! Now I just need to remind myself that making it now won’t make Saturday come any sooner.
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Unfortunately bakery products have very little effect on the passage of time. Though that does sound like an excellent episode of Doctor Who.
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
You should suggest that to Steven Moffat, it might make you rich! You wouldn’t have to do removal jobs then.
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Haha, any requests for what to put in my sure-to-be-a-hit episode? Rory is going to be the main focus because Rory is my favourite.
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Is that the character who keeps dying? Sorry, I’ve only seen a couple episodes, I have no idea what constitutes successful episode. Shame on me, I know.
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Yeah, it is. He's died about four times and he's still kicking around (for now). Perhaps I'll have to get you to watch Doctor Who. It's one of my few concessions to popular culture.
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I have very little patience for supernatural monsters, but I might be persuaded to make an effort for you :)
Wednesdays, Thursdays and Fridays should be banned.
From me
To Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Many and varied, hm? I hope they match up with my own plans.
Trust me, the terror is mutual. People don't usually have high expectations of me, so I'm very concerned! If I do nothing but talk about planes just kick me in the shins – it's a nervous response. I'll either babble or just stare at you, but as you're gorgeous I think I'm allowed to do that. I can't imagine why I won't like you just as much, if not more, after meeting you.
Fitton is as dull as dishwater, trust me. I don't mind driving to Dartmoor, or we could go for halfway – Bristol, perhaps? I really don't mind, Dartmoor is about three hours from here, which isn't that long for me. I'm used to driving up and down the country.
I like to think that Dad would have been at least a little bit proud of me, or at least be a bit more understanding. I'm probably deluding myself, but I can't be proven otherwise.
My flat has one skylight, and it's a small one, but it's better than nothing. I do get some nice views of sunset, sometimes. Your one sounds far nicer. I hope the young woman with the stressful job finds a nice boyfriend, then we can be friends without it being awkward. The children can learn all the musical instruments they want, I don't mind – I'll take a child learning violin over heavy metal any day. That's how bad it is! I look forward to meeting the rest of my fictional neighbours :)
I have a moving job tomorrow. I hope the woman who's hired me won't mind my constant state of distraction. I've already tried to make tea and put the kettle back in the fridge, then left the room with an empty mug, leaving my actual tea to go cold on the counter.
I believe I promised you brownies. Should I make them this time, or should I withhold them so you're forced to meet me again?
Three days – I'm going to start a countdown!
Martin
Indeed they should. Oscar thinks so too.
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
My plans are very flexible, as long as the general idea is there!
If worst comes to worst, we’ll just stare at each other, then. I am certainly not going to kick you – I’ve already told you I don’t mind you talking about planes, especially if it helps you relax. Besides, if it goes well, we’ll have plenty of opportunities to talk about other things later.
I think Bristol sounds good. I really don’t want to subject you to six hours worth of driving, especially since you drive a lot. How about we have lunch somewhere and eat the strudel in a park, if the weather stays nice? I’ve never been to Bristol, so tell me if you know any nice places. I think I’ll probably take the train – I suspect I’m going to be way too nervous to drive.
Are any of your student housemates partial to heavy metal? It sounds like you have a lot of bad experience with it. I hope most of them are nice and don’t throw too many parties!
The attic flat is obviously going to be the best flat out of all of them, if I’m going to design it with you in mind. Everyone will want to live there!
I’ll tell you a shameful secret about me: I leave my tea to go cold all the time, even when I’m not distracted by thoughts of you. I have drunk so much microwaved tea that I don’t think I’m even allowed to be British anymore. Now that I am distracted by thoughts of you, I should probably abandon any and all attempts at hot beverages.
I really doubt I’ll need an incentive to see you again, but maybe it would be best to keep the brownies of the next time. I’ll probably be overly giddy even without a sugar high. (And it will be a good way to force you to see me again.)
Good luck with the moving job! I hope you get a massive tip.
Henry
Wednesday 28th March
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Good morning :) My moving job is going well. The customer is very nice and she brought packs of jelly babies for the trip.
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Don’t eat too many of them! :) Glad it’s going well. Oscar and I are having a little a lie-in. If you get a jumbled text it’s because he stole my phone. X
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
There is no such thing as too many jelly babies. There is such a thing as too many boxes of books, though. Enjoy your lie-in, you lucky sod. X
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Surprise for you in your e-mail x
I can now add “reluctant model” to my CV
From me
To Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
I know Bristol fairly well, so if you let me know a preference for food I can recommend somewhere to eat :) There's a nice park that overlooks the river, and the centre of Bristol is really lovely with fountains and things so we could go for a walk? I hope you're going to be okay leaving Oscar for the day.
You microwave your tea? Henry, that is appalling. The least you could do is make a new cup. How do you think the tea feels, being mistreated like that?
I'll save the brownies for next time, then. And trust me, short of you actually turning out to be an axe-murderer I am definitely going to want to see you again.
I'm really kind of fond of my students. And yes, I do call them “my” students – despite some of them having questionable taste in music I do like them. I've done quite a lot of comforting after break-ups, or bad results, and I join them for crap telly nights sometimes. They're usually good enough to warn me when they have proper parties – they even try and schedule them so I'm either away or at least not going to be trying to sleep off jet-lag, which is nice of them. They've either gone home for Easter or they're knuckling down with revision now, though.
Today's moving job was one of the most pleasant I have had in a long time. The customer, Julie, was lovely and didn't treat me like my main aim in life was to be a pack animal, which is always a perk. Also jelly babies. It turned out that she was a photographer, and she offered me more money if I let her take a picture of me – something about cheekbones, I don't know. Anyway, now a photograph of me exists that I don't hate with all my being, so I thought I'd send it to you :) Somehow my hair is curlier than ever, and my eyes seem to belong to an alien. Oh well!
How are the flats going?
Martin x
IMG_101.JPG 555 KB
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Forgot my phone at home like an idiot, couldn’t wait to write to you but now I can’t because that picture turned my brain into jelly. You’re gorgeous. X
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Sorry? :p Every time I see it I just see all the things that are weird about my face. But thank you. x
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
There is nothing weird about your face. Your face is beautiful, you’ll have to take my word for it. I hope you got a proper rest after all the boxes of books! X
Why did you become a man with a van instead of a model, why?
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Can all of your customers be like Julie please? She’s clearly a very sensible woman with refined taste. If aliens are as beautiful as your eyes I will be looking forward to an alien invasion. I don’t know how I’m going to cope with seeing you in person. You are utterly gorgeous.
A walk would be lovely! It’s supposed to get a bit colder, but I think I’ll find a way how to keep you warm. I’ve been craving some Thai food lately, but anything else is fine, we can go to your favourite restaurant if you have one. I doubt I’ll notice what I’m eating anyway.
I know, I know, microwaving tea is unforgivable. It just feels like a waste to pour away a perfectly good cup of tea, especially when the next cup would be running the risk of suffering the same fate. But I can’t be perfect, can I? I have to have some bad habits.
I was gone for half a day today and Oscar survived unharmed, so hopefully he’ll be fine on Saturday. If I start worrying about him too much, think of something to distract me :)
It’s sweet that you and your students take care of each other. My flatmates when I was at Uni weren’t quite so considerate. How long have you been living there?
I met the orangery clients for the last time today and they seemed happy with what I had to offer, so I have a feeling of a job well done. I also saw Mr Lewis and we agreed on the last details of the conversion, so I’ll be able to start working on that soon. I’m looking forward to it, actually, though not nearly as much as to seeing you.
Would you like a picture of me in return? I don’t have your cheekbones or a professional photographer, of course, but. I figured you might want one. (Oh God, I feel so stupid for suggesting this.)
Two days!
Henry x
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Well, it’s your opinion that counts :) I fell asleep this afternoon so I feel all woozy now. How was your day? x
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Meeting with clients, shopping. I’m a bit knackered now - didn’t get much sleep last night. But thinking of you makes everything better :) x
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I’m sorry you didn’t sleep well :( I wish I could help. Did the meetings go well? x
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Meetings were OK, I’ll be able to introduce you to your remaining neighbours soon :) I’m hoping one day you *will* help me fall asleep. X
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I look forward to meeting them :) I hope they’re nice. I would really like to help you fall asleep one day. X
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I wouldn’t give you unpleasant neighbours! You should know that you’re helping already, I’ve been feeling much better since we started writing to each other. X
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I’m glad. You’ve helped me so much as well. I don’t remember the last time I was this happy. Thank you. x
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
You make me so happy too. Sometimes I worry it’s too good to last when we haven’t even met yet, but I really hope it will. X
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Sorry, I’m getting too emotional. X
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I might be getting a bit emotional too. I’d sort of resigned myself to being on my own, so you seem too good to be true. I really want this to work. x
Chronic shyness, I imagine.
From me
To Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
I would love it if all of my customers were like Julie. She was very funny and clearly very excited to be moving in with her girlfriend, so she kept me in high spirits. And full of sweets, which is important.
I always think that my eyes are too far apart – they look like they're on the sides of my face. But enough about my apparent issues with my appearance.
Maybe I'll accidentally forget a jumper or jacket, then you'll definitely have to keep me warm. I have no body fat to speak of, so I do get cold easily... I don't have a favourite restaurant, but Thai sounds excellent! I know somewhere though I've never been, so it will be new for both of us :) I'll find a way to distract you from Oscar-worries, never fear. I want to see lots of photos of him though – I presume you have lots, since you're an obsessive cat owner.
Microwaving tea seems to be your character flaw, so I suppose I'll let you have it. Doesn't mean I approve, though.
Don't laugh, but I've been here for ten years now. Generally the students are very nice – I'm a resident adult who can help them out when they do ridiculous things like forget how the washing machine works, or how to set up direct debits, or what to do when they trip all the fuses again. I make myself useful.
I'm glad the orangery clients were happy with what you did! It must be a good feeling :) I presume the flats will take a lot longer?
Don't feel stupid, because I definitely want a picture of you. You have no need of a professional photographer, you're very handsome.
Still can't wait!
Martin x
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I feel the same. I also feel I should go to bed before I say something horribly corny and turn this into a soap opera. Tell me to shut up if I start talking nonsense, will you? X
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I'm sure I could match you for corniness, don't worry. I should be getting to bed too. Good night, I hope you sleep better x
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Sweet dreams x
Thursday 29th March
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Good morning! Is it weird that the first thing I want to do after I wake up is find out how you are? X
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I hope not. I was just about to text you and you’d got there before me. Morning! How are you, did you sleep better? X
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Much better, thanks! I’m planning to start working on the flats to make the day pass as quickly as possible. What about you? More moving jobs? X
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I’m currently in Douglas on the Isle of Man. We flew some machinery parts out here and now we’re waiting for someone to come and take it off GERTI. It’s very sunny! X
At least I don’t have to share your pictures with anyone
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Yes, enough about your issues with your appearance, because they are completely unfounded.
If you forget your jumper or jacket it will obviously be an emergency, and that calls for desperate measures. I hear sharing body heat works quite well – care to test this hypothesis? (Okay, my attempts at suave flirting sound completely ridiculous. Sorry. Clearly I’m never going to be an irresistible seducer.)
I have an unmanageable amount of pictures of Oscar. There’s enough of them for you to look at for several hours, in case you start getting bored with me.
I bet all the students think of you as Uncle Martin who can fix everything :)
The flats are going to take much longer than the orangery – it’s a much more extensive job, of course, and Mr Lewis also wants me to monitor the progress of the works until it’s all done, so that’s going to take a while. But I already know who your fictional neighbours are! There is a couple in their fifties who divorced ten years ago but now they’re back together. The woman is one of those who like to feed you up, but luckily she doesn’t have a daughter so you’re safe from her matchmaking attempts. Finally there is a group of three students flatsharing, so that’s familiar territory for you. One of them is doing a degree in Aviation Technology or some such thing and likes to ask lots of questions.
I was trying for about an hour to take a presentable picture of myself, but self-timer is clearly not my friend. It always makes me feel sort of nervous for some reason. Anyway, have one where the lighting is horrible, but at least I don’t look deranged.
Just Friday left to get through!
Henry x
IMG_1325.JPG 50.2 KB
Are you the jealous type, then?
From me
To Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Just got back from the Isle of Man. We spent a long time persuading Arthur that the city Douglas was actually named after our Douglas. I think he bought it, but getting Arthur to believe something is like shooting a barrel stuffed full of fish, so... Anyway, that's me done for the day.
I think your attempts at suave flirting are more irresistible than any actual suave flirting could ever hope to be. And I'll be bitterly disappointed if we don't test that hypothesis.
The students do tend to think I can fix most things – often at two in the morning. I'll hear a shrill yell of “MARTIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN!” I need some sort of bat signal.
I'm glad the older couple got back together. And the woman is more than welcome to feed me up if there's no scary daughter to try and marry me off to. If the students need any help with their electronics they're more than welcome to ask me, and I'll happily talk to the one studying Aviation Technology. I'll probably drive him or her crazy in the end.
Your photography attempts were well-worth it. You're gorgeous, so you have no need to be nervous. Also, you have amazing arms. Is that a weird thing to say? I don't care anymore. And a lovely smile, and very blue eyes, and I still think your ears are adorable. I really can't wait to meet you in person.
One more day!
Martin x
Not terribly, but having you to myself makes me feel special
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
I hope you’ve also told Arthur that Martin in Slovakia and Crieff in Scotland are named after you. You’re the captain, obviously you have to have more places named after you than your first officer.
I’m very pleased that you find my amateurish flirting irresistible. I shall be using that to my advantage. I’ll also use my amazing arms to prevent your bitter disappointment. I try to work out regularly, so I’m glad it’s paying off.
I’m glad you like your neighbours! They’re all very fond of you as well. I got started on the project today, although Oscar was doing everything in his power to distract me from it. He seems to be getting even more active and playful than before. You must meet him one day, I’m sure he’ll love you.
I hope the students at least make you a good breakfast when they wake you up at night! That’s what I would do if it was me that kept you awake. ;)
Are you working tomorrow? I should, but I’m worried I’ll spend all day trying to choose what to wear instead. It’s been a while since I had a date – you’ll have to excuse me if I overthink it and end up looking ridiculous. When will we meet? Around twelve?
Henry x
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Glad you had a chance to enjoy the sunshine! Today I made sure to drink my tea while it was still hot, I hope you’re proud of me :) x
Feel special, then!
From me
To Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
I've not told Arthur that, but I shall bear it in mind for future flights! Though I think Arthur sometimes forgets that my name is Martin: he always calls me Skipper or Skip. His last girlfriend asked me why my parents had named me that.
I was wondering whether you worked out, and now I have my answer (and some exceptionally nice mental images). Does lugging boxes into the back of a van count? I'm not sure it does.
I hope Oscar didn't cause too much disruption! You should get him a ball or something that he can chase around without your input. Or does he have one of those and he still demands that you play with him? I would love to meet him one day, I'll keep him occupied for a bit.
The students don't make me breakfast, and I feel cheated now. Maybe I should start dropping hints. I certainly hope you weren't planning on keeping me awake by asking me to fix your electrics! What would this breakfast include, if I may ask?
I'm not working tomorrow, no. So I'll spend the whole day wavering between giddy excitement and fear. Don't spend too much time picking out something to wear – I'll definitely spend time on it, but I don't own any nice clothes. Don't be disappointed if it's jeans and converse on me. I literally cannot remember the last time I had a date, so... yeah. I'm going to have to find something to occupy myself tomorrow, but I think it will be an exercise in futility.
Twelve sounds fine, and we could meet outside the Museum? That's central, and really easy to find. There's parking nearby too.
I can almost count down in hours now.
Martin x
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I am very proud of you, don't worry :) I am spending this evening watching House in an attempt to keep myself occupied. It's not really working. What are you up to? X
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Reading, but it doesn’t really work either. I keep thinking how nice it would be to have someone (read: you) to cuddle with while I read. X
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
What are you reading? I've taken in nothing from the last episode at all. Some cuddling would probably help my concentration too. X
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
The girl with the dragon tattoo. I’m years behind everyone else with this one. It’s not my favourite book so far, cuddling would be much better. X
Friday 30th March
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Hello sunshine, I hope you’re having a lovely morning! X
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Good morning! How are you? I had a lie-in this morning, it was lovely. Can't wait for tomorrow X
I feel very special and very nervous
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Lugging boxes certainly counts for the nice mental images, as I believe I’ve already mentioned. Especially if you do it shirtless, which I doubt, but one can dream. I’ll judge the amazingness of your arms tomorrow :)
Oscar has a ball. In fact, he probably has more toys than the average five-year-old child. He can entertain himself on his own quite well. Too well sometimes, and I’ll realise what he’s up to only when an ominous sound reaches me. (Don’t worry, nothing too bad. Mostly he knocks over empty plastic bottles or the peg basket, which is apparently great fun, especially when he can scatter the pegs everywhere and then watch me pick them up.) I’d love to watch you play with him – my two gingers!
I certainly wouldn’t ask you to fix my electrics. I’d come up with much more pleasant activities. Your breakfast can be whatever you want. You seem to have a sweet tooth, so maybe pancakes? Croissants and strawberries? Or just plain old bacon and eggs, if you prefer. Served in bed, obviously.
Jeans and converse sound just fine to me. But don’t say you don’t have any nice clothes – what about your uniform? I’m not suggesting you should wear it tomorrow, of course, but I thought you should know I wouldn’t mind seeing you in it one day.
I can’t believe I’m going to see you tomorrow! I’m equal parts anxious and excited. At least I can finally bake the strudel today, so that should occupy me for a while.
See you outside the Museum, then. I’ll be the one looking nervous.
Henry x
If I'm this nervous now God knows what I'll be like tomorrow
From me
To Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
I don't do deliveries shirtless, no. I think it would frighten the customers.
I should have guessed that Oscar was an incredibly spoiled cat. I hope he doesn't get into too many scrapes! Have you had to kitten-proof your house? I remember going to see Caitlin just after Elsie was born and Tom was obsessively checking everything that she could possibly get into, even though she couldn't even hold her own head up at that point.
The last time I had pancakes was... well, I think Arthur made them, so that doesn't count. I hope you realise that this is basically a written contract, so you now have to make pancakes.
Trust me, my uniform isn't that nice compared to other airlines (though I do like the hat). I'm sure I can arrange to be wearing it for you one day, though!
I need to find something to occupy myself with today. I'll probably go for a walk and feed the ducks – I've not been to see them for a while. Not that they'll have noticed, of course. I hope the strudel goes well: my entire opinion of strudels the world over depends on this, so no pressure.
Just over 24 hours to go. I think I'm mostly excited at the moment, but I'll be the one wringing my hands tomorrow.
Martin x
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Currently on a mad dash to the supermarket – just found out I’m out of cinnamon and sugar. Glad you enjoyed your free morning! Can’t wait to see you either. X
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Don’t forget the raisins! :p Some of the ducks have eggs, so soon there will be ducklings. Maybe I’ll kidnap one for a pet. X
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Don’t worry, raisins are on the list. Ducklings are adorable! Not sure if Oscar would want to be friends with one, though. Our pets have to be friends! X
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Are cats friends with any other kind of animal? I get the impression that they dislike or are indifferent to all other species. X
We will make a very nervous couple
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Oscar isn’t a spoiled cat, I’ll have you know. He’s just a well taken care of cat. … Well, maybe a little bit spoiled. Just a tiny bit. The problem with cats is that unlike babies they can get everywhere and you can never put anything too high for them to reach. They want to chew electric cables and climb on the curtains and play with toilet paper. I tried to think of everything he could hurt himself with or break or make a mess with, but somehow he still manages to surprise me.
Ha ha, it looks like I can get you to do anything I want by bribing you with sweet foods! You’ll have to come over and stay the night to deserve your pancakes. (But don’t worry, my intentions are entirely honourable. I have a lovely guest bedroom.)
Who knows what ducks notice? Maybe all this time they’d been wondering where this lovely man who was always so kind to them had gone, and today they were very happy to see you.
I put great effort into making the best apple strudel in history, so hopefully the reputation of all the world’s strudels will be restored :) I think you’ll like it, even though there will be no whipped cream.
So, tomorrow. You know, I think it will be fine. I mean, I’m nervous as hell, but at the same time I have good feeling about it. A very good feeling.
Henry x
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Hmm, you’re probably right. Then again, Oscar is clearly a very exceptional cat. He could surprise us. X
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Maybe I’ll have to get a really unusual pet. Like a gecko or a bird of paradise, or a pygmy goat. X
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Get a gecko, they’re cute! How was your day? X
That's okay, I'd like to be nervous as half of a couple.
From me
To Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Yes, it's a good thing that Elsie was never able to climb curtains. And I'm sure there is no better taken care of cat than Oscar :)
Oh no, you've discovered my weak spot! Although I don't think I'd do anything for just anyone in return for sweets. And I hope your intentions won't stay entirely honourable. (Oh God, my attempts at suave flirting are even worse than yours.)
The ducks certainly seemed happy to see me, judging by the way they swarmed about me. That may have had something to do with the bread though. It's amazing how violent ducks can get when they want something. Then I got pulled into a conversation with a very old lady who told me that she was glad some young people weren't “yobbos” any more. Then she asked where I went to school – she refused to believe that I was in my mid-30s. I... don't know if that's a good thing or not.
I am probably getting more excited for this strudel than I should be. I don't think anyone has ever looked forward to a strudel more. And I can live without the whipped cream, we don't want to go too mad.
I probably won't get much sleep tonight. I'm going to try and read this evening, but I don't think even Terry Pratchett is going to hold my attention. I have a really good feeling about tomorrow as well. My stomach will tie itself in knots, but I'm so excited.
Martin x
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
They are quite cute, in a goggly-eyed way. My day was fine, very quiet which was unusual. How are you? x
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
It’s nice to have a quiet day sometimes :) I’m trying everything to remain calm, so I decided it’s time for spring cleaning. X
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Spring cleaning? Does this mean you’re a tidy person? I’m a bit of a neat freak, I’m afraid. X
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Not obsessively, but I prefer it when everything has its proper place. Better to be a neat freak than not knowing where things are, I think! :) x
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I try not to be obsessive, and I’ve got better. I still have to alphabetise my books and things. I can’t be too obsessively tidy when I live with students! X
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I tried to alphabetise books as a kid, but got frustrated by having to move half of them every time I got a new one, so I gave up. You have stronger will! X
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I tried to give it up at one point, but I actually couldn’t do it. And there’s no patches for giving up things like obsessive tidiness x
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
It’s not such a bad thing to be obsessed with! But we could try a kind of motivational therapy: a kiss for every hour of not cleaning? X
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
That could backfire. Soon I’ll be doing no cleaning at all and I’ll turn into a hideous slob. X
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Hmm, okay, different strategy: a sweet food of your choice for not exceeding a weekly limit of hours spent cleaning? Kisses for free :) x
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
That sounds excellent, but rather one-sided. Any bad habits I should be helping you to break? Some sort of reward for not letting your tea go cold? :) X
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
It’s not one-sided: I love having someone to cook for. But if you want to reward me for drinking hot tea, I’m not going to stop you :) x
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Well, I can’t provide you with baked goods, but I’ll come up with something to reward you with I’m sure :) x
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I’ll be looking forward to what you come up with, then! But it must be something you’ll enjoy too, otherwise it won’t be fair. X
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Well, it will involve you, so of course I’ll enjoy it! I’ll let you know when I decide what it will be. Maybe tomorrow will give me a brainwave x
Saturday 31st March
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Good morning. Today’s the day! X
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I wasn’t even able to have breakfast. Can’t wait. Sorry if I make a fool of myself. See you soon! X
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
My eagerness might be showing. I’m here already, hovering awkwardly. See you soon! X
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
You’re hovering adorably. Turn around. X
Chapter Text
Can I call you my boyfriend now?
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
I just wanted to say thank you. I had a great time, despite the rain and the horrible waiter and everything. You are cute and funny and gorgeous and I don’t remember the last time I felt so good with someone I’d only just met – or with anyone, really. That old lady you met was right that you look younger than you are (though not like you’re still in school. That would have been weird.). I love the way the ends of your hair curl in the rain. And you are adorable when you ramble about planes, you know? I could listen to you for hours. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you all this when we were together – I’m not very good at saying things like that in person, but I’ll work on that.
I still mean it that you’d be very welcome here if you wanted to come. Are you free at Easter? Or any other time – Oscar and I would be glad to have you here. There can be pancakes for tea if you only wanted to come for a day (just so you know that I’m not going to abuse the power sweets have over you) :)
I hope you got home all right. How are things with your van?
I miss you already.
Henry xxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Just got home to find the power is out, so you’ve been saved from a rambling email about how amazing I think you are. But I do think you’re amazing. I had a fantastic time today even though everything seemed to go wrong. Thank you for such a lovely day :) xxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I may have already sent you a rambling email about how amazing I think you are, so you can look forward to that when the power comes back on. Why do so many things go wrong today? Have you got candles? Xxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
A lot of things went wrong, but I wouldn't have changed any of it. I've been thinking about you non-stop. (And I have a torch, don't worry!) Xxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Candles would be more romantic. I keep thinking about you too. When can I see you again? I miss you. Xxx
Sunday 1st April
Oh God yes please.
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Power's back!
I'm really glad you had a good time. I had an amazing day. Even though the waiter clearly had it in for us, and we picked the only rainy day. You're even lovelier than I thought. I've never found it easy to get on with people, but I felt so comfortable with you. You have the cutest laugh I've ever heard. I'm glad you didn't mind the incessant plane chatter... Also, the strudel was fantastic!
The van is okay- it's not something that hasn't happened before, though it was rather embarrassing for it to happen yesterday. Thank you for staying with me to wait for the RAC :) And for keeping me warm :)
I would love to come to Dartmoor! We're on standby this week, but I think we finish on Friday so I have Easter weekend free. I really want to see Oscar :) I'd like to come for the weekend, but I'd... like to take things slowly if that's okay. I feel silly asking, but I've not been with someone for a long time and... Yeah. Sorry.
I hope you're having a good day. What are you up to? I really miss you already.
Martin xxx
Hello, my dear boyfriend
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Is it bad that I’m sort of grateful that your van wouldn’t start because I got to spend more time with you that way? I swear I’m generally not an evil person :) I had promised to keep you warm, so I was glad I could keep my word :) And that you liked the strudel, of course. (My theory is that the waiter was just jealous and bitter that there were no charming airline captains who would want to go out with him :))
I’m sorry, I should have realised that asking you to stay overnight so soon could come across as sort of… inappropriate. I really didn’t really mean… anything by it. I just want to spend as much time with you as possible and get to know you better. I’d rather take things slowly too, so you really have no reason to feel silly. I do have a lovely guest bedroom that can be all yours for as long as you want. I’m so glad you want to come! Oscar is looking forward to meet you :)
I suppose being on standby isn’t much fun. What do you do, play even more word games than usual? Is that even possible? :) I’m not doing much today, just some small jobs in the garden and keeping Oscar entertained. I’m still too wired from yesterday to concentrate on anything more complicated :) What about you? No more mishaps, I hope!
Henry xxx
Hello, boyfriend (that makes me so happy I have no words for it)
From me
To Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Now I just have to hope that my chocolate brownies will live up to your strudel. You've well and truly thrown down the gauntlet. And you're not evil, I think that was the nicest hour and a half I've ever spent in the van. Though, I'd quite like to kiss you somewhere a bit more comfortable next time.
And it wasn't inappropriate, it was fine! I want to come and stay, I want to spend as much time with you as I can. I just thought I should... say. I'm a little bit old-fashioned, I think. I'm glad you're of the same mindset, that makes me feel better. I'm looking forward to meeting Oscar too! He looks like he's grown so much in those pictures you showed me :)
Nothing makes Carolyn happier than standby: being paid to fly with no actual flying involved. I'm not a fan though, because it's a lot of time when I could be working. Still this one is five days, which is fine. It's when people book us for a month of standby that I start to fret. We do play a ludicrous number of word games, drink our weight in tea and coffee, and play board games too. Anything that will stop us caving and letting Arthur play charades.
You've got better weather for gardening today. Did Oscar miss you? I'm just tidying a bit, trying to keep myself occupied. I know what you mean about feeling wired, I'm just constantly grinning to myself like a nutcase. I've not managed to cause any more mishaps, no! Though I should probably touch wood or something now...
Martin xxx
Monday 2nd April
Can you think of any wordless means to show me exactly how happy you are?
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
I have no doubt your brownies will be delicious, but I’m not sure if I will be an objective judge: right now I think I’d love just about anything if it was made by you :) You should know that I have a very comfortable sofa and a swing seat in the garden, both of which seem like perfect places for kissing. (Though I didn’t really notice any discomfort in your van – I was too busy noticing you.)
I gathered you were old-fashioned when I saw your phone :) (Sorry – couldn’t resist) There’s nothing wrong with that. I can’t wait for you to come! My feeble attempts at spring cleaning I did on Friday will now have to be taken to a whole new level. I have a feeling Oscar won’t like that, but he’ll have to learn to live with it. I wonder how he’ll deal with having another person in the house – an intruder in his domain. I think he does miss me when I’m gone – he always gives me a very warm welcome, in any case. And you’re right that he’s growing so fast – it seems like every day he eats twice as much food than the day before.
How is your first day of standby? Not too boring? I’m hesitating whether I should ask you why you don’t want to let Arthur play charades. At first I thought that it’s because he’s so good at it and the rest of you never get a chance to win, but then I remembered everything you’d told me about him and now I’m not so sure. Do I want to know, or will the answer scar me for life?
What if I called you this evening? I miss your voice.
Henry xxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Good afternoon, Mr Knight. I had been wondering why our valiant captain had spent the whole day grinning like an imbecile, but now I have my answer. It seems that stealing his phone was a very good idea on my part. Good luck to you, you may need it. - Douglas Richardson.
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I hope you are aware that stealing is a criminal offence, Mr Richardson. Not to mention a betrayal of trust. I would consider myself lucky if you kindly gave Martin his phone back and let him keep it.
Are you aware that your first officer steals your phone?
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Are you sure he doesn’t have your email password or something? I don’t need any more shocks in my life.
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
My my, we are touchy. Not to worry, I won’t give anything away. I shall return you to your scheduled soppiness. DR
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I’m sorry about Douglas - he is a spectacular git at times. That’ll teach me to leave my phone where he can get it. Xxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I know we only met thanks to him, but really. This wasn’t a nice surprise. I wish I could just go and hug you now. Xxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Are you okay? I’m really sorry about him, but it’s okay, really. Don’t be upset. I wish I could hug you too. Xxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Sorry, I’m overreacting. It’s just that everything I’ve written was meant just for you, I don’t like the idea of anyone else reading it. I’ll get over it, don’t worry. *hugs* xxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
It’s fine, I didn’t want him reading them either. He’s not malicious about it though, he’s just a sod. I’ve stolen his car keys and hidden them on top of GERTI’s wing to get my own back. Hope you’re okay, lovely. *Hugs* xxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Revenge is sweet :) You know, sometimes when I text you I just want to press ‘x’ until I run out of character space. Xxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
It is sweet! Though he has now retaliated by throwing my hat on top of the portacabin. Childish man. I don't have enough character space for all the x's I want to send you :) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I hope you got your hat back! Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Something tells me we’re behaving like teenagers. Xxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
We are, but I never got to do this as a teenager, so I’m allowed. And I did get my hat back - I can climb, unlike Douglas. Carolyn is not pleased with us. Xxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I never did this as a teenager either, so I guess we have a right to be a bit silly :) xxxxx
I'm still sorry about Douglas, I promise he's not a bad person
From me
To Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Back from Day #1 of standby...
I think you may have had a bad impression of Douglas, from what I've told you and from his ridiculous messages to you, but I promise he is actually decent. He's sarcastic and too superior for his own good, but he's not a bad person. He spent a while trying to tease me about you, but then admitted that he was pleased. He's a good friend, deep down. Very deep down.
I have changed my e-mail password though. Just in case.
Yes, my phone is a brick, laugh all you like. I can't deal with these touch screen ones – I tried to use Arthur's iPhone once and I couldn't get my head around it. I'm like a crotchety grandfather, unable to use this new-fangled technology you kids are using these days. Get off my lawn, etcetera.
Standby was fine, actually. And we didn't have to play charades, thankfully. And Arthur is terrible at charades. It's quite terrifying how bad he is. We once had twenty five minutes of him miming “Apocalypse Now”, without knowing what “apocalypse” meant. That was topped by over half an hour of attempts to mime “Inception”. It was miserable and painful for everybody involved.
Your house is sounding more and more fantastic. How on earth do you have such a big place? I checked the wall chart and I am absolutely free this weekend. Hurray :)
Yes, please call me! I'd love to talk to you properly. I miss you!
Martin xxx
If you say so
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
I believe you. I just wish we had had a better start. I want your friends to approve of me, and now Douglas probably thinks I’m too sappy and too uptight.
Don’t worry, grandpa, I’ll take good care of you. I’ll show you how to operate the microwave and the DVD player, and you can have a room on the ground floor so you don’t have to climb stairs :)
It really doesn’t make any sense for one person and one cat to live in such a big house. I inherited it, and I… can’t sell it, or rent it. It’s the only place where I lived with my parents. My only clear memory of my mother is of her sitting at the bottom of the stairs and lacing her boots. It’s a bit of a waste, I suppose, all those empty rooms, but I don’t want other people living here. I’m just too sentimental for my own good. But it is a nice house, and I look forward to having you here so much.
You know, after all you’ve told me about your job, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to take an airline seriously :)
I’ll call you as soon as Oscar calms down a little and I won’t have to worry about what he’s doing when I stop paying attention :) He’s very boisterous at the moment.
Talk to you soon!
Henry xxx
Don't worry about what Douglas thinks – I don't care
From me
To Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
You are neither too sappy nor too uptight. You’re wonderful. Douglas thinks I'm an uptight stick-in-the-mud who cares too much about rules and regulations and is incapable of even the most basic human interactions. Don't worry about what he thinks! If he doesn't like you, that's his problem. And besides, he will like you because you're lovely. So there.
Of course it's your parents' house. I'm sorry, that's really obvious, and it was an insensitive question. I'm really sorry, I'm an idiot. I am really looking forward to visiting though.
You'll never be able to take a charter airline seriously. I'm sure the pilots at Air England don't mess around like schoolboys – I doubt it, anyway. Though from what I've seen of RyanAir, we're actually very mature. Though I'll have you know that I am very professional – I'm just surrounded by the most unprofessional people in the industry :)
I hope Oscar isn't being too destructive! Talk to you in a bit :)
Martin xxxxxxxx
I fear your opinion of me might not be entirely objective
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
It wasn’t an insensitive question and you’re not an idiot – you couldn’t have known. Besides, I want you to know these things about me, even if I don’t really like talking about them.
But enough of the sad talk – Oscar seems to have worn himself out.
Henry xxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
It was so good to hear your voice. I wish I could fall asleep with you. Xxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Me too. We can on Friday, if you still feel like it. And if you don’t mind a hyperactive cat getting in the way :) xxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
That sounds wonderful. And I’m sure I can deal with Oscar if he’s willing to put up with me :) xxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
He might get a bit jealous that you’ve stolen his favourite cuddly toy, but I’m sure he’ll come round when he realises how nice it is to cuddle with you :) xxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Hm, I’m not sure how willing I am to share you :p I doubt Oscar will want to cuddle me, I’m a bag of bones. Is it Friday yet? I need it to be Friday. Xxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
So *you* are the jealous type, then :) You’re lovely to cuddle with as you are, but I’ll make a point to feed you up a little :) Still Monday. Those useless days again. Xxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Days are rubbish. I need a time machine. I won't complain about the feeding up if the food is as nice as that strudel, and if it means I'll get cuddles. I don't know if I'm the jealous type – maybe I am! I'll try not to be jealous of your cat though. Xxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Don’t worry, you’ll get cuddles even if you don’t like my food :) I hope you will, though. You have to let me know what your favourites are, so I know what to make. Xxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
To be honest, so long as it's not pre-packaged plane food I'm sure I'll love it. Make whatever you like :) I'm not coming for the food, after all! I’m off to bed, so I will talk to you tomorrow. Sleep well, gorgeous Xxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Good night, sweetheart xxxxxxx
Tuesday 3rd April
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I had a dream about you. You were telling me how much you dislike scented soap. No idea where it came from, but it was certainly one of my best dreams :) xxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
How strange! I have no real opinions about scented soap... You were in my dream too. Something to do with exchanging GERTI for cheese. How are you this morning? :) xxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
You seem to like cheese a lot :) I’m fine, but would be better if you were here :) Taking Oscar for vaccinations today. Somehow he knows and doesn’t look very happy about it. Xxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Cheese is delicious! I can’t blame Oscar for not being very happy about that. I hope he behaves himself! Xxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Hmm, I think I’ll make something with cheese sauce for Friday dinner. I hope *Douglas* behaves himself today and standby goes smoothly! Xxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Douglas is being his usual self. We’re playing pictionary with Arthur. It’s proving interesting. “Something with cheese sauce” sounds lovely! Xxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I hope you’re winning! :) Oscar is a bit off-colour after the vaccination, which is normal but it still makes me worry about him, poor darling. Xxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Oh no, poor Oscar :( I hope he feels better soon! Give him lots of cuddles – though I'm sure you will anyway. We're not doing too badly, though Arthur does insist on guessing that everything is a dinosaur. Xxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I think he’s a bit sore, he doesn’t even want cuddles :( But he should get better soon and start driving me up the wall again, hopefully. Do draw a dinosaur, that could satisfy Arthur and he’ll move to something else :) Xxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Unfortunately you don’t get to pick what to draw in Pictionary. I’m sure Oscar will be back to normal soon, he probably just needs to wallow in self-pity for a bit. What else are you up to? Working? Xxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Oh no, my abysmal knowledge of word games is showing. I’m trying to work, but between checking up on Oscar and thinking about you I’m not getting much done :) xxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Don’t worry. I know a lot of word games, but it doesn’t mean I’m any good at them. I’m even worse now I spent most of my time daydreaming about you :) xxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Sorry I’m lowering your success rate :) When are you off duty? I was thinking the evening phone call could be a regular thing. Xxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Yes, that sounds like an excellent plan! We’re allowed to leave at 5, so I should be home by 5.30 xxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Can’t wait! :) Oscar has stopped refusing food now, so hopefully I won’t have a reason to talk your ear off about him. Xxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
That’s good, I’m glad he’s feeling better! And you can talk about him as much as you like - I just like hearing you talk :) xxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
<3 This is one of those moments when I automatically revert to ridiculous teenage behaviour. I love hearing your voice too. Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
It took me an embarrassingly long time to work out what that symbol meant, and now I’ve gone absolutely scarlet. Will we grow out of our ridiculous teenager behaviour? Probably not <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
No, probably not. But at least we’re in it together :) <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I’m home! Give me a few minutes to make a cuppa, then I’ll be free to talk :) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Brilliant! :) I’ll make myself a cuppa too and we can have phone tea! Xxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
The phone tea was lovely, thank you! I hope your ankles have recovered from Oscar... <3 xxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Thank *you* - clearly I need you to remember to drink my tea while it’s hot :) Don’t worry, my ankles are used to worse treatment. Have I ever told you that I love to hear you laugh? <3 xxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I’m glad I helped to improve your tea drinking :) I’m sorry I laughed - it *did* sound quite funny from where I was, though <3 xxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I’m sure it must have :) At least Oscar is no longer lethargic, so that’s an improvement. How is your pasta? Xxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
It’s... boring. Pasta-like. I’m going to try and watch a film, though I imagine I’ll fall asleep on the sofa just after the opening credits. Oh well! xxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Has a day of word games worn you out so much, my poor sweetheart? <3 Remind me to introduce you to some non-boring pasta. Xxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
They’re exhausting, I’ll have you know! I wish you were here, this sofa is far too big <3 xxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
So is mine. But soon! <3 What are you watching? Xxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
North by Northwest. It’s one of my favourites, mostly because I have a bit of a crush on Cary Grant. Only two full days left! xxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Hmm, I’m wondering if I should be jealous. Well, since he’s dead I suppose you can have him. Two days is far too long! Can’t wait to see you again. Sleep well, darling <3 xxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Don’t be jealous - I’d still rather have you than Cary Grant if that helps. Friday can’t arrive soon enough. Sweet dreams, gorgeous <3 xxxxxxx
Wednesday 4th April
I’ll regret writing this in the morning
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
to me
Hello darling,
You are asleep now. At least I hope you are – it’s half four in the morning. I imagine you sleeping. How sweet you must look! Pillow creases on your face, your hair tousled, lips slightly open. I wish I could see you.
Remember when we talked about falling asleep together? Of course you do. I’d like that so much. But it’s probably not a very good idea, and not because of the cat. I don’t usually dream about nice things like you talking about soap. Most of the time I don’t remember what I dream about, fortunately, but sometimes I have nightmares. They are not as frequent as they used to be but they still happen far too often, and they aren’t nice. Well obviously they aren’t nice, they’re nightmares. What I want to say is that it wouldn’t be very nice for you either. Oscar is a cat, he’s either awake or sleeps so heavily that a hurricane wouldn’t wake him, so he doesn’t mind. But you… I’d wake you up at the very least, and I’m not used to sharing a bed. I don’t know how I might react. I tend to be a bit disoriented when I wake up. I don’t want you to have to deal with that so early. I don’t want you to have to deal with that at all, but at some point you’ll have to if you decide to stay with me.
I’m sorry. This must seem so bizarre to you. I promise I’ll explain… soon. Though you’ll like it all even less after I’ve explained. You are wonderful, and I’m so sorry.
Henry xxx
I wish I could hold you right now.
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
I hope this e-mail makes sense, but it might be a little rambly. Sorry – I'm a bit emotional this morning because I can't bear to think of anything bad happening to you. I had to go and have a bit of a sit down and think about what to say properly. Anyway, here goes.
We don't have to do a single thing you're not comfortable with, not ever. You don't have to... justify it to me, or explain, or anything. I'll never push you or ask for anything you don't want to give. If you don't want to share a bed yet then we won't, it's as simple as that. You have nothing to be sorry about.
I wish I could help you. I care about you so much, more than I've ever cared about anyone, and I hate that you're hurting. If there is anything I can do, at all, that might help then please tell me. But you don't have to tell me anything you don't want to, but I also promise that you can tell me anything you need to. If you need to talk after a nightmare, you can call me. I don't mind – don't worry about waking me up. I don't have a regular sleeping pattern, and I would much rather you called, even if it's to talk about absolute nonsense.
I can wait for as long as it takes to fall asleep with you. I don't care. Well no, obviously I care a great deal about how much this is hurting you, but I don't care if it takes years, or even if we never can. I just want to be with you.
You have nothing to be sorry about, darling. I promise. Thank you for telling me, I’m really touched and glad that you did.
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Thank you
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
to me
Thank you. You’re amazing, you know? I don’t know what else to say. Just thank you so much, for everything. You have no idea how much it means to me, even if you might change your mind later. (And don’t say you won’t, because you can’t know that.) I really want to get better for you. I don’t know if I can, maybe this is the best I’ll ever be, but I’m trying. I want to be with you.
I wish you were here now.
Henry xxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
<3<3<3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Are you okay?
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
I won't say that I won't change my mind then, though I can't imagine why I would. But I can promise that I'll do everything I can to help and to understand – I'll probably muck it up a bit, but I want to be there for you.
I want you to get better for you, though. Not for me. But whatever I can do to help, I'll do it.
I miss you so much.
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I hope you’re okay. Call me if you need to talk <3 <3 <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I’m fine, just tired. It never seems so bad in the morning. I feel a bit ridiculous now. I’ll call in the evening as usual, don’t want to disturb you at work. Miss you. <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Don’t feel ridiculous, it’s fine. I’m glad you told me, and that you feel okay. Is it snowing in Dartmoor? It’s absolutely freezing here! Wish I had a winter coat! <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Not snowing, but it seems pretty cold, though I haven’t been outside yet. I wish I was there to warm you up. I bet I’d do a much better job of it than any coat :) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I have no doubt that you’d be far better than a coat :) We’ve taken refuge in the plane - there are holes in the roof of the portacabin. It’s going to be a long day. What are you up to? xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I’m just getting down to work for a bit, then lunch and shopping and more work – nothing exciting, but I like my routine. I hope your day passes quickly! Maybe the client will finally decide to fly somewhere. <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Well, we’ve managed to whine at Carolyn enough that she’s letting us go to Fitton for lunch where we can sit somewhere warm. Thank God, I’m losing feeling in my fingers! It would be lovely if the client decided to fly, but something tells me he won’t. He enjoys our suffering, I think. <3 Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
What an evil client. Have something nice for lunch at least! <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
More ramblings
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
I’m sorry I made you worry. You don’t need to – I’m used to this, it’s really much better than it used to be and I can cope with it. I am not used to it affecting another person, though, and that’s why I’m a bit all over the place now. At first I thought I could somehow keep you out of this, but it really isn’t possible and I wouldn’t even want that in the end. You don’t know how much you’re helping already just by existing and talking to me and caring about me. I’m actually glad I told you.
Sorry if that didn’t make any sense. I don’t even know what I’m trying to say. That I’m lucky to have you, I suppose. I need to stop being maudlin and get to work. You should know that I miss you every second.
Henry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Further ramblings in return
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Well, I probably will still worry about you because, used to it or not, it's still an awful thing for you to live with. I'm glad it's better though – if it's improved already, then hopefully it can carry on getting better :)
I don't want to be kept out of anything. I want to know everything about you, no matter what it is. If you don't want me to know then that's fine, as I said, but don't feel that you need to keep me away from things for my sake.
I'm incredibly grateful to have you. No one has ever cared about me the way you do, and you can tell me anything at all.
Missing you.
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I think I had a bucket of tomato soup, but at least I warmed up. Briefly at least! Finally back home, and the heating is actually working. Hurray! How goes the work? xxxxxxxxx <3
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Phone tea again? :) Or coffee. I think I need coffee. And you. <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Absolutely! I’m just going to shower because I’m frozen and drenched. Fifteen minutes? <3 Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I think I just had an improper thought about you showering. Xxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Could we please pretend I never sent that text? You could fry eggs on my face right now. Xxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Um, is it okay if I *don’t* pretend you never sent it? Anyway, I’m just making the coffee, so hopefully you’ve recovered from your moment of indiscretion... Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
It made me forget all about coffee. But it’s okay, I’ve made it now and I’m ready to behave decently. Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
You are a perfect boyfriend, just so you know. Talking to you always makes me feel so much better. <3 xxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I highly doubt that, since I’ve never really been a proper boyfriend before. But thank you :) I could talk to you for hours. I can’t wait to have a whole weekend with you <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Well you are a proper boyfriend now and you won’t be getting out of that position any time soon. :) I can’t wait either. I really hope I won’t muck it up somehow. <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I’m glad to hear it, because I was planning to keep you! You won’t muck it up, it will be absolutely fine. We both managed the first meeting, and that was brilliant even though lots of things went wrong, so I see no reason for this to be any different. Except it will be better. I have a good feeling <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
It’s true that it’s unlikely that there could be more things going wrong than the last time, and we managed that fine :) I hope the weather will be nice – there’s a place where I want to take you. <3 Xxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I think it’s meant to be okay this weekend. Dry and cloudy, but not wet, or so I am informed by our ATC. And I am officially intrigued by “a place”... <3 xxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
It’s not a very nice place, actually. I want to take you to nice places too, of course, but this one is where my nightmares happen. I want to kiss you there until I forget where I am. <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I will kiss you anywhere you like, no matter how horrible. <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
I was going to call but I thought I'd make more sense in an e-mail.
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
I must have written and rewritten this e-mail about ten times now. I just don't really know what to say. You're probably in bed, so I'm sorry if this is the first thing you see in the morning.
I decided to look up some stuff about Dartmoor before I visited this weekend, because I really don't know much about the place. There was some stuff about conspiracy theories and hauntings, and it sounded a bit mad, but quite interesting, so I started reading about it all. I found a YouTube video of the documentary that it turned out... you were part of.
I think I know where it is you want to take me. I honestly don't know what to say to you. I know I told you that you didn't have to tell me anything until you were ready, and I feel like I've pried into something private. This is presumably not how you would have chosen to tell me, and I did say I would wait until you were ready. I'm so, so sorry. But not as sorry as I am about what happened – I can't even begin to imagine it. It's no wonder you have nightmares. I can't tell you how desperately sorry I am, and I wish I could do something. You're such a wonderful person, you don't deserve a single shred of this and I hate that you've had to live with it. I don't know how I could possibly help, but you've only got to ask and I'll do whatever I can.
Please message me when you can and just... let me know you're all right. If you don't want to talk about... this, then that's absolutely fine. If you don't want to talk at all yet then that's fine too. I just need to know you're okay.
I'm sorry, sweetheart.
Martin <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I’m okay. I need to think about… what I want to say, and I’ll email you in the morning, but I need you to know that I’m okay and you don’t have to worry. I was going to tell you anyway. <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Okay. And there’s no rush, you don’t have to explain anything yet. I’m still sorry *hugs* <3 <3 <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Thursday 5th April
I’m sorry
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
to me
I am so sorry that you found out this way. I had no idea that the stupid documentary was available anywhere. I don’t know what you must be thinking now.
The documentary isn’t very accurate. It’s true that my dad was killed and I saw it happen, but there wasn’t any genetically modified monster or any animal at all. But for twenty years I was convinced there had been, which is why the villagers here aren’t exactly sure of my sanity. But then, about a year ago, it turned out my father was in fact murdered. It doesn’t really make any sense for me to like murder mysteries, given that I was in one – with a genius detective and his sidekick and a dramatic conclusion and everything. I imagine you have heard about Sherlock Holmes? The news was full of him some time ago (and I don’t know what happened to him but I know he wasn’t a fraud). I don’t think I can explain it all to you in a coherent way, but Sherlock’s friend John has written about it here: http://www.johnwatsonblog.co.uk/blog/16march.
I’m really sorry, this must be so horrible for you. I don’t know what I would do in your place. I didn’t want you to know at first, you are so amazing and you deserve a normal boyfriend and you shouldn’t have to deal with all this. But you are so lovely and supportive and kind to me and I just wish you could want me even with all this… baggage.
I don’t know what I can say to make it seem less awful to you. I am not crazy, if you can believe that, I am not suicidal and I no longer own any illegal firearms. I’m all right, considering, but I understand completely if this is too much to deal with and you don’t want to see me anymore. But I suppose it’s better that you’ve found out about this sooner rather than later.
I’ve never met anyone like you or cared about anyone so much and I’m really sorry about this. You deserve so much better.
Henry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Client called so I’m flying to Paris. I didn’t have time to reply to your e-mail this morning, but I’ll send you a reply later. For now I just need you to know how desperately sorry I am, and that I am *not* leaving you. You’re absolutely wonderful, and I want to be with you. I’ll be thinking about you all day. Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3 <3 <3
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Thank you, sweetheart. You are absolutely wonderful too, and I’m so grateful to have you. I can’t wait to see you tomorrow. Have a good flight! <3 <3 <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Is there anything Parisian you would like? I’m here for a while, waiting to take the client home :) This also means I don’t have to work at all tomorrow, so I could come earlier? <3 Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Oh god yes please, the sooner the better. Um, I mean, please arrive whenever it’s convenient for you, I’m not impatient or overeager or anything. At all. You don’t have to bring me anything, just your lovely self. <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Well, I'm sure I'll manage to get there a *bit* earlier than planned, at least. (I won't be up at the crack of dawn waiting for an acceptable time to set off, absolutely not). I can't wait! And you may have a Toblerone, because Arthur is insisting I get you one. He says hello :) Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Tell him I say hello back, and that I think Toblerones are brilliant :) I think any time is an acceptable time for you to set off, just so you know. <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
“Brilliant” is Arthur’s favourite word, and Toblerones are one of his favourite things, so you have just endeared yourself to him forever and ever amen. I will let you know when I’m leaving - it’s about a 3 hour drive :) <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I guessed as much, based on everything you said about him, and I thought it would be nice to have a better start with him than with Douglas :) I’ll be doing my best not to spontaneously combust during those 3 hours :) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Don’t worry about Douglas, he now thinks very highly of you because you put up with me. Anyway, we are off to find crepes for lunch at Arthur’s insistence :) What are you up to? xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I don’t “put up with you”. I enjoy every minute spent with you or talking to you. <3 Just got home from a walk. Sadly I don’t have anything as nice as crepes for lunch. Enjoy it :) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I hope you had a nice walk :) And you’re a rare breed. Most people don’t want to spend more than 20 minutes with me unless forced to. Oh well, that doesn’t bother me now :) <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Most people are clearly idiots. But in this case it works to my advantage :) My walk was nice enough, but it’s still bloody cold – now it’s me who needs you as a source of warmth. <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I will be very happy to provide said warmth tomorrow :) Paris is very cold too. Crepes have been located, and I can see the Eiffel Tower. No offence meant to MJN, but I’d rather be here with you xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I’d love to go to Paris with you. It’s a bit cliche perhaps, but who cares? <3 I miss you. Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Some cliches are good cliches. Maybe we can one day :) <3 Miss you too xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Maybe one day we can :) I keep thinking about the moment you arrive here. I’m planning to hold you for at least half an hour. If you have any objections you should raise them now <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Why on earth would I have objections? It’s just made me all the more eager to get there. Heading back to the airfield now xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
You have nothing to be sorry about
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
I still don't really know what to say, though I've been muddling it over in my head all day. I know absolutely nothing I can say will make this better. I can't begin to imagine what that must have been like to go through. I am so sorry.
I have vaguely heard of Sherlock Holmes: the newspapers were all over him at one point, and then it turned into some sort of witch-hunt. I remember hearing that he'd killed himself, which is just awful. And if he solved this for you, then I can't see how he could have been a fraud.
I've just read John's post about what happened. It's a little confusing, but... God, Henry. I think after seeing your father murdered, and being exposed to whatever that drug was... you're entitled to all the nightmares in the world. I think you're an incredibly strong person, to keep going back and fighting to find out the truth. Though I find it absolutely revolting that people in your village were using your experiences to lure in tourists. It's just... disgusting.
Henry, how can you tell me about all this and then worry about how it's affecting me? Don't worry about me. And I want to be with you, with everything that's made you who you are, good and bad. This whole thing has upset me, but it's upset me because I hate that this happened to you, that you have to live with this, and that you came so close to killing yourself - that terrifies me. But I don't think you're crazy, and of course I believe that you're so much better. I'm sorry that I'll never get to meet Sherlock Holmes and thank him for helping you.
I don't want a 'normal' boyfriend. I want you, and no one else. And you'll have to forgive me tomorrow if I hug you and don't let go.
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
P.S. This John Watson fellow needs his eyes checking. You're not a “normal-looking bloke” - you're far more handsome than that.
You are a wonderful person
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Actually, a lot of what you’ve said makes it better, in a way. It means a lot to me that you still want to be with me even though you could have someone much easier to be with. And of course I worry how it affects you. You never asked for anything like this and it’s not going to be pleasant for you. But I’m… so happy. I’ve always been more or less alone, and I’ve always wanted someone who would be in this with me. Maybe after some time you’ll find that it really is too much (and you must know that I would understand that), but just the fact that you aren’t running away now means so much. You are brilliant.
I never want you to let go.
Henry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
How was your flight back, gorgeous? Are you packed yet? <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Sorry, I’ve been making brownies! One of my students has been ‘helping’, but she made it take far longer. I’ll pack when they’re done :) how has your evening been? <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Mostly just working, trying to get a bit ahead so I can be all yours when you are here :) Do let your helper have a few of the brownies, even if she wasn’t very useful. I’m sure they’re delicious, though not as delicious as you <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
If you need to do some work whilst I’m there then I really don’t mind :) And I’ve promised Alisha some brownies (admittedly under pain of her pulling my hair), so don’t worry :) <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I’m certainly not going to be working while you’re here. One of the perks of being freelance is that I can arrange my time so that I’m free when my irresistible boyfriend visits. Tell Alisha that anyone who damages your lovely hair will have to deal with my wrath. <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Do you have a wrathful bone in your body? Sorry sweetheart, but in a fight between you and Alisha, I think Alisha would win. And irresistible? You’re incredibly silly. <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Happy to help, I suppose!
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
I'm glad I've made it a bit better with my rambling at you :)
I've... never had a proper relationship before, so I don't know what an 'easier' relationship would be like, but I find you easier to be with than anybody else I've ever met. Normally I can barely hold a normal conversation with someone if I want them to like me – the only reason I started getting on with MJN is because I was locked in a metal tin with them for hours on end. So... this might be a difficult relationship, but I don't care.
Obviously I realise that it could get more difficult, and there could be effects that I don't know about yet, and you never know what will happen. But at the moment I can't imagine any situation in which it would become too much for me. Nothing you've told me has made me want to run away – it's just made me want to be closer to you. I've always been alone too, I know how that feels, and I don't want to be alone any more.
I don't want to lose you. Is it... strange that we're already saying things like this when we've only met in person once? It doesn't feel strange, but maybe it should.
Tomorrow needs to hurry up.
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Well you are certainly irresistible to me, and I hope that mine is the only opinion that counts :) My wrath is only activated when someone threatens my irresistible boyfriend :) <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Of course yours is the only opinion that counts. I now have a mental image of you having some Hulk-like transformation because a girl pulled my hair :) <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Now you’re making my chivalrous nature sound ridiculous :) I can’t wait for tomorrow <3 xxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Mm, I find your chivalry incredibly charming :) Though don’t worry, you don’t actually have to protect me from anyone so you can stay your lovely, non-wrathful self xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Thank god, I’d probably make a terrible hash of it :) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I’m going to bed to at least try and sleep. See you tomorrow, darling. I can’t wait! <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Sweet dreams <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Friday 6th April
My emails to you get progressively more and more sappy
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
I don’t know if you’ll get a chance to read this before you leave, but that doesn’t matter because I might as well tell you in person. I don’t know if it should feel strange, but it doesn’t, it feels right. You are the best thing that has happened to me since… ever, really. I’ve never felt so good with anyone and I don’t want to lose you either. I’ll do all I can to make this work.
See you soon! <3
Henry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I am just leaving! See you in three hours - I am very excited! <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
So am I, and Oscar seems to have caught it from me. I’ll try not to spam you with impatient messages while you’re driving. See you soon! <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Chapter 5
Notes:
Thank you so much to Bri for betaing this for us!
NOTE: There are time jumps in this chapter- just as a heads up! Check the datestamps and things :)
Chapter Text
Saturday 7th April
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I can hear you pottering around. I'm awake now, come and give me a cuddle xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Are we texting each other from one room to another now? :) Your ordered cuddle is coming with pancakes on the side <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
You're the best :) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Monday 9th April
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
You’ve been gone for less than five minutes and I miss you already <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Just stopped to get petrol. I miss you :( <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
We should elope together and live on a remote island. Oscar misses you too. Deep down. <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Luckily enough I have access to an aeroplane, so it shouldn’t be too difficult! I’ll believe Oscar misses me when I see it :p I just got home <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I’m sure he loves you already, he’s just too stubborn to show it :) Glad you got home safely, though I’d like it much better if you were still here <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
He’ll have to love me - we are Team Ginger! Alisha is making a roast for Easter. If I don’t text you later it’s because I’ve been killed by food poisoning. Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
It is sad here with only one half of Team Ginger left to snuggle with me. How did I get used to you so quickly? Please say you haven’t been poisoned <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Not poisoned, no! And I shouldn’t complain, she waited till today so I could have some. About to go to bed. It’s going to be very lonely. <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Very lonely here too. I’d much rather fall asleep on the sofa with you and wake up with a crick in the neck again. Sleep well, darling. <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Tuesday 10th April
Good morning!
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Hello, sweetheart :)
Well, I did manage to get some sleep last night, despite the fact that it was lonely. I just wanted to thank you again for such a lovely weekend. I had a fantastic time, and it was over far too quickly. I'm still sorry about your greenhouse – are you sure you don't want me to pay for it? It was my fault!
It's going to be difficult for me to go back to my cooking or aeroplane food after you feeding me up for a weekend. I'm not used to so much nice food! I hope Oscar has recovered from the indignity of having someone else in his house. Hopefully he'll forgive me soon and we can move on.
I'm flying off to Amsterdam later today, so I have to go. Just thought I'd send you a quick e-mail first :) Hope you're keeping yourself busy. I miss you!
Martin <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
You apologise too much
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
I told you not to worry about the greenhouse. It’s fine, a glazier is coming later today to replace the pane. Soon it will be as good as new. But I’ll make sure there’s nothing breakable nearby the next time I let you near a football :)
You’ll have to come back soon for more of my food. I’ll give you something to take home :) Though your brownies were excellent, so I have a hard time believing there’s anything wrong with your cooking.
Oscar has recovered from the invasion to his domain, and I’m sure next time he’ll take it much better. He’s curled up and purring next to me as I type, so clearly that means he sends his best wishes. I’m planning to spend most of today working – your fictional counterpart will have a very nice flat.
I miss you too. I suppose I’ll have to resign myself to the fact that missing you is going to be my permanent state whenever you’re not around.
Have a good flight, and let me know that you arrived safely.
Henry <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Saturday 14th April
Finally on the fifth State
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Hello from Maine!
We're finally on the last leg of our America trip. Unless Carolyn decides that we need to nip across to Canada soon, which is a possibility. It's very cold here, which is a bit of a shock after San Francisco. At least it was quite warm there – and I won't have the hilarious sight of Douglas in a gay bar this evening, either.
The motel we're staying in (which looks frighteningly similar to the Bates Motel, so Arthur insisted on checking all the showers for knife-wielding maniacs) has three cats wandering around. One of them looks like an older version of Oscar! The one-eyed tortoise shell is following me everywhere. She is very cute. I might try and smuggle her out in my flight bag.
What have you been up to? I hope the flat clients haven't been causing more difficulties and are just letting you get on with it. Also hoping you've not just been working!
I'll try and give you a ring later – if I call you at about 4, it should be about 9 p.m there, is that okay?
Miss you lots!
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
Why is America so big?
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Gay bar, hmm? I hope you told all those men who were no doubt throwing themselves at you that you are very much taken. If Carolyn makes you fly to Canada you should at least force her to make a stop in Toronto and visit Jenny. We talked on Skype the other day and she was adamant that she needs to meet you as soon as possible. I sent her a couple of the pictures we took last week and she says you’re cute. You’re also officially invited to her wedding in September.
I think Oscar would be very put out if you brought a cat from America. I don’t think he could accept another intruder :) I wouldn’t mind, though. Tortoiseshells are beautiful.
You know that Oscar would never let me work all the time. I need to save time for cuddles and games :) I’ve managed to reach an agreement with Mr Lewis, though his wife gave him a very nasty glare when he accepted my suggestions instead of hers. I’ve also been working in the garden a bit – the weather has been very nice, so it’s been surprisingly enjoyable. Every time I go to the village someone asks me about you. My pub quiz teammates are outraged that I haven’t introduced them to my handsome young man yet, so brace yourself for them cooing over us.
Call whenever it’s convenient for you, I’ll be at home anyway, and I don’t mind if you wake me. I’ll take talking to you over sleeping any day!
I miss you too. I really hope Carolyn doesn’t add another trip to your programme. <3
Henry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Sunday 15th April
It’s not as big as Russia
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
There weren't exactly a lot of men throwing themselves at me, don't worry! The ones that tried to chat me up did so after they heard my voice – apparently British accents are attractive to American men. Never fear, I told them in no uncertain terms that I had a gorgeous boyfriend at home.
I'm glad I meet with Jenny's approval. I hope you've told her that I will put my foot in my mouth several times over on meeting her, because I'll be desperate to make a good impression? It's very sweet of her to invite me to the wedding! You'll have to give me the dates so I can tell Carolyn I won't be around (yes, she does need to know six months in advance).
I've left Flopsy in America, though it was a tough call. She was very beautiful – I got a picture of her though! I'll show you when I see you.
I'm glad Mr Lewis agreed with you. Hopefully his wife will come round. You're the one qualified to do this after all. I'm not surprised people are asking about me, considering how much you were showing off when I was there! I'd love to meet your team mates, provided they don't expect me to be any good at a quiz.
So far there is no hint of another trip, so I will hopefully be back on home soil tomorrow!
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
It’s still too big and too far
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
The accent never seemed to work for me when I was in America. It’s probably because my voice isn’t as ridiculously attractive as yours.
I did tell Jenny that you can get a little flustered, yes. Then I’m afraid I went off on a tangent to explain how adorable I find that and everything else about you. Luckily Jenny is very understanding and she let me go on and on about you for ages :) The wedding is on 29 September, so book your weekend off :) (Obviously your invitation is off if you break up with me in the meantime, so don’t do that or you’ll miss out on wedding cake.)
It would have been silly of me not to show off with you. Not everyone gets to date a charming and gorgeous airline captain, I feel it’s a reason to be proud. And what do you know, you might be brilliant at quizzes! You certainly have a lot of practice from your word games that could come in handy.
I hope you get home soon! I was wondering if I could come and see you in Fitton once you’ve had some rest. I’d like to see the place where you live. I wouldn’t mind helping you with deliveries :) Of course it’s fine if you’d rather not. I just can’t wait to see you, it’s been too long.
Henry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
Monday 16th April
I'm home! England! Tea!
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Pfft, your voice is lovely. I think they were put off when I started stammering at them.
Poor Jenny. I think I should get her a present to make up for having to hear about me for ages and ages. I'll try and make it up to her in September (I'll continue to string you along until then – I want cake!)
If you ever witness me in a game of rhyming journeys you will swiftly retract your comment about me being good at quizzes. Or any sort of word game, actually. My inability to win at anything is a running joke, surely you've learnt that by now? :) Unless there's a round on “obscure aviation knowledge” - if there is, then I'm your man!
You are... more than welcome to visit Fitton, though I promise you it is utterly dull and you would have to put up with my student house. I know you know I live here, but it's not exactly somewhere I'm proud of. I don't have guests... ever. But obviously I want to see you as soon as possible!
Sorry, I know that didn't sound very enthusiastic. The lack of enthusiasm is entirely directed at my living situation, and not at all at you. I'm sorry. I’m flying out to Belgium tomorrow, and I’ll double-check my schedule then :)
I’ll call you later?
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
It’s time for phone tea!
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
I think you’d be much more likely to win if you had your most faithful fan beside you :) A round on obscure aviation knowledge is unlikely, I’ll grant you that, but Audrey Hepburn films could easily make an appearance, and I remember you know a lot about those!
I really wouldn’t mind putting up with your student house, but you don’t have to take me there at all if you’d rather not. You can just show me the duck pond or something. You can come here again if you prefer, of course, I just assumed you’d be weary from all the travelling. Or we could go for a day trip somewhere if you want, I don’t care, I just want to see you. <3
But we can talk about that on the phone. I miss your voice! I also have to tell you about Oscar’s unfortunate encounter with a floor mop. It was more entertaining than it sounds, though not so much for Mrs Baker, who had come over to borrow two eggs and it scared her half to death.
Talk to you soon!
Henry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I can’t wait for the weekend! I’ll try and find something to do in Fitton so I can keep you at least a little entertained :) I hope Oscar has recovered from his mop-related adventures. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Oscar is more than fine, but I’ll need to buy a new mop. I’m sure you’ll think of *something* to keep me entertained :) Miss you so much xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Would you object if my plans consisted almost entirely of kissing you? I get to that point and my brain sort of... stops. I miss you. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I think that sounds like an excellent plan! Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
Friday 20th April
Every part of me aches
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
I'm fairly certain I told today's clients that I have a van, not an artic lorry. How they expected me to move that much stuff in one trip I don't know. I am knackered. Still, they tipped me so I can pay my rent this month.
How are things going? I hope you slept better last night! Did you decide whether you were going to drive or take the train tomorrow?
Alisha and Pival are desperate to meet you. Apparently you need “vetting”, though I'm not sure what form that will take. They're very nice girls though, they've just decided that I come under their protection. Or something. But I'm fairly certain that they're harmless!
Cannot wait for tomorrow. Miss you!
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
My poor darling
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Too bad I’m not there to take care of you! I’d make you lovely cup of tea and your favourite food and then I’d give you a massage. And then cuddle you to sleep <3
I didn’t sleep very well last night either. But it’s fine, I took a nap in the afternoon, don’t worry. I’ll probably take the train tomorrow. I don’t like driving when I’m tired, and I don’t expect to get much sleep tonight either. I’ll text you if I sleep well and change my mind in the morning.
I was looking forward to meeting your students, but now I’m a bit worried. What if they decide I am not worthy of you? But it’s sweet that they like you so much and want to protect you :)
I’m looking forward to tomorrow so much! And I have a little surprise for you. You’ll love it :)
Henry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
Tea, cuddles and massages sounds amazing
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
I really wish I could help you sleep better. Tomorrow I will give you lots of cuddles. I hope you sleep okay tonight, at least.
The students are fine, don't worry! And it's only Alisha and Pival, you won't have to meet Rich or Stephen this time. Alisha, my brownie-helper, is more bark than bite, and Pival is the least intimidating person in the world.
Hi Henry! Pival here. Martin's just gone to help Alisha put out a minor cooker fire. Not to worry, and don't be scared about meeting us, we're really nice. Or I am, anyway. And Martin has been very, very happy lately so it's all good.
Pival.
P.S. You are very cute. If you change your mind about liking men, I'm available ;)
Oh God! I leave my computer for a few minutes and it gets stolen! I'm not allowed to delete Pival's message. Though she’s right, you are cute. The cooker fire is out now. I don't think Alisha should be allowed near the oven ever again, personally.
I am intrigued by this surprise - I can't think what it could be. I'm mostly looking forward to seeing you though, obviously. Our third proper meeting. It definitely seems like we've known each other far longer!
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
Why does everyone around you steal your electronics?
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Tell Pival that unfortunately for her I’m very unlikely to start liking women when a very lovely man wants me for a boyfriend :) But I’m looking forward to meeting her and Alisha, though I hope Alisha won’t be cooking. It seems almost like a life hazard. And I’m very glad if I can take some small credit for your happiness :)
I slept just fine while you were here – maybe you act as a dream catcher for me :) It’s a shame that thinking of you before I fall asleep doesn’t help, because I do that a lot. I can’t believe we’ve only met twice so far. I feel like I’ve known you for half of my life.
Don’t get too excited about the surprise. It’s just a little thing, but I’m confident that you’ll like it. I’m looking forward to the cuddles and kisses you promised :)
See you tomorrow, darling.
Henry <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
I don’t know what it is about me!
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
It was the Hindu New Year in the holidays, so Pival brought lots of traditional sweets back with her. They're delicious, and there's plenty left. She's planning to offload a lot of them onto you, just as a warning. Though her cooking is far, far better than Alisha's, so you have nothing to fear.
I hope I can help you sleep this weekend! I am fairly sure that I think about you more than I think about anything else – and that's coming from someone who has been unhealthily obsessed with flying for thirty years. You are the main reason for my happiness, silly.
I'll carry on being excited for the surprise, because I don't get surprises that aren't Arthur's latest foray into cuisine. I'm off to bed, so I will see you tomorrow!
Sleep well, sweetheart.
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Good night, honey. I hope I’ll dream of you tonight. <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Saturday 21st April
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Good morning! How did you sleep? I’ve gone for a walk to stop myself pacing the house impatiently. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I couldn’t fall asleep for ages, but when I finally did at least it was a dreamless sleep. I hope you had a nice walk :) I’m on my way – only about an hour left! Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
That’s good news :) Are you on the train? xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Sorry, I dozed off. I should be there in about 15 mins :) Hopefully your surprise survived the trip unscathed. See you very soon! Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I’ll meet you at the station. Can’t wait! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
Wednesday 25th April
I hope you bring me true Nicaraguan coffee
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Hello sweetheart,
How are you finding the tropics? Probably not better than here, where it’s been drizzling non-stop for about three days now. Oscar doesn’t like it – he misses chasing butterflies in the garden. Do you know what I miss? Yes, you guessed it – you. Non-stop as well. But that isn’t exactly news, is it? All the time I keep thinking about things I would say to you if you were here.
I got a new job! It’s a pretty standard loft conversion, but I’m glad because the flats won’t need my full attention any longer, and the clients are a lovely elderly couple. Their only drawback is that they keep repeating what a lucky woman my future wife will be and they won’t hear otherwise. It reminds me of my grandmother.
I hope your day of return hasn’t changed again. Oscar and I are ready for you :) He misses you too, you know. I think he’s finally done his calculations and realised that more people = more attention paid to him.
Have you won any word games recently? You know I keep my fingers crossed for you all the time. It makes typing very difficult.
Henry <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Your wish is my command
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
The tropics are... tropical. Which means a lot of humidity, which means my hair is huge. (Don't laugh – I know you're laughing.) There was a lot of rain yesterday, and Arthur was convinced it was a “bassoon”. By which he meant a monsoon. It was a long day, and made longer by the lack of phone signal. Talking to you would have made it far better – I miss you!
I'm glad you got a new job, and that these clients probably won't be awkward. Watch out, they'll be introducing you to their granddaughters and setting you up on dates. Don't run off with any prospective wives whilst I'm stuck out here!
Nothing has changed just yet, and I don't think it will. Carolyn's harping on about getting home as soon as possible, so I should be with you right on time. I can't wait to see you (and Oscar, of course). Can I be cheeky and ask if you can make that risotto again? It was amazing.
Won any word games? Don't be daft. I think the score was 8-2 to Douglas on the way here and I don't hold out much hope on the way back either. Don't destroy your fingers for me! :)
I hope the rain has stopped!
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
I want to see your huge tropical hair
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
I was just about to elope to Gretna Green with one of my clients’ beautiful granddaughters, but if you say you’ll bring coffee I suppose I’ll stay and wait for you. Also their granddaughters are five and seven years old, which could be a problem, so I’d better settle for you. And I’ll even make you risotto. (It really is a pleasure cooking for you – you always praise even the simplest things. It will go to my head soon.) (And it’s not cheeky. You know you can ask me for anything anytime.)
You should know that my faith in your ability to win word games never fades. And I have high hopes for your flight back. Trust my clairvoyant instincts.
One would have thought that after some time my excitement about getting to see you would wear off, but it doesn’t. I still feel like a child on Christmas Eve :) The rain has stopped and it should be dry and sunny when you’re here – I was thinking we could go for a hike. I’ve been sitting around too much lately and I’m a bit restless. Oscar will be angry about being left at home all day, but he survived when I was in Fitton so he should be fine :)
Thinking of you <3
Henry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Friday 27th April
Gretna Green? I was going to take you to a remote island
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
You'll settle for me? How charming ;) Maybe I'll keep this coffee for myself!
I'm back in England and have finally managed to tame my hair. ‘Big’ is not a good look, trust me. And I continue to lose any and all word games – sorry! I think your clairvoyance is faulty.
Hiking sounds like an excellent plan to me! I really want to see more of Dartmoor. Hopefully Oscar can keep himself entertained for a day – I'm sure he'll find some part of your house to destroy whilst we're gone.
I'm going to get an early night so I'm fully recovered from the flight and able to leave early tomorrow :) I know what you mean about the novelty not wearing off – part of me hopes it does because that means I'll have spent a lot of time with you, which is obviously what I want, but I do quite like being this excited. I'm going to fall asleep thinking of you <3
See you tomorrow!
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
You win, a remote island sounds much better
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Don’t be silly, you know you are my prince charming. <3 Now give me my coffee. You’d ruin it with milk and sugar.
I don’t know if I believe you about your hair. If I recall correctly, every time you complained about it I thought that it was just lovely. Maybe a little funny, but adorable.
I’m not sure if you are a good role model for Oscar. You don’t seem concerned at all about his destructive tendencies. Luckily he’ll be closed in the bathroom, with everything unattached to the wall removed.
Sleep well, darling, and see you tomorrow.
Henry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
Monday 30th April
(Good morning sweetheart,
I'm sorry I'm not there this morning – I had to leave early to get to the airfield and I didn't want to wake you when you'd managed to fall asleep at last.
I know you told me you had nightmares, but I had no idea that they could be that bad. I wish I could have been more help. Please, please don't worry about it though.
Call or text me when you wake up and let me know you're all right.
Thinking of you.
Martin xxxxx)
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
You could have woken me, I’m sorry I missed you in the morning. You’re probably about to take off now – text me when you land, and I’ll call you then. I’m okay, and I’m glad you were here. <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
I wish I had got to kiss you goodbye
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
to me
I want to thank you so much, darling. You were wonderful, especially when I lashed out at you like that. I’m really sorry about that, and that you didn’t get enough sleep because of me. I hope you’re not too tired. Did you make yourself a cup of that delicious coffee at least?
I can never fall back asleep after a nightmare, never. But I did with you – I felt safe with you, as cliché as it sounds. There’s nothing more you could have possibly done to help.
Thank you for taking care of Oscar in the morning – he would have never let me sleep so long if you hadn’t taken him out of the bedroom and given him food. I’m so grateful to you for being here for me. I wish I knew what to do for you in return.
You left your sleep tee in the bathroom. I fear I might be very immature and cuddle with it or something. It smells like you.
I miss you.
Henry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I didn’t want to wake you, you looked very peaceful. I’m glad you’re okay, and I hope I didn’t give Oscar too much food this morning. We’ve landed - I’ve got about two hours to spare so call any time :) Miss you already. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
You did, you just weren't awake for it
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Please don't be sorry, it's not your fault at all. You barely touched me, and I'm used to not having much sleep. My sleep pattern is bizarre anyway – my body never knows which time zone it's in. I'll just get an early night tonight :) That coffee definitely helped, it's strong stuff!
I'm glad I could help even a little bit. It sounded so awful, I felt useless. But you seemed to be sleeping very soundly, and I thought you could do with the rest. Oscar got up when I did, and he seemed very eager to get out. I hope he was okay shut in the kitchen.
You don't have to do anything 'in return'. You already help me so much every day, trust me.
I knew I must have left something! You're more than welcome to the shirt if you want it. I hope you like David Bowie. (It's slightly immature, but it's an adorable mental image, so don't worry.)
Miss you too. Remember you can call me any time if you can't sleep.
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
But I don’t remember. I feel robbed of my goodbye kiss
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
You’ll just have to kiss me more next time.
For a moment I wondered what David Bowie had to do with anything. Didn’t you notice that the print is so washed out it’s almost unrecognisable? At first I thought it was some kind of abstract pattern. Soon the shirt will be completely see-through, but I certainly won’t mind when that happens :)
I’m glad that you and Oscar have finally become friends. He’s been sniffing at your shirt, maybe he’d like to snuggle with it too. But I won’t let him, it’s all mine :)
How is Dublin? I haven’t done much today – waking up at midday has made feel sort of disoriented. I think I’ll spend the evening watching telly and cuddling with Oscar when I can’t have you.
I could call you again a bit later if that’s all right? I feel like I miss you more than ever because I didn’t say goodbye to you. I really hope I’ll never have a reason to wake you in the middle of the night, I don’t want to do that, but thank you so much for the offer.
Henry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
I'm sure I can make it up to you somehow.
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Well, I've loved David Bowie for a very long time. There's a reason I use that one for sleeping in rather than just to wear – though now I'll have to use another one. Oscar has either decided he likes me, or he's going to use my shirt to create a voodoo doll of me which he will proceed to torture to his heart's content.
Dublin was fine – we were barely there long enough to leave the airport. It felt like a rather pointless trip, to be honest! Oh well, Dubai tomorrow – though GERTI decided to lose one of her anti-icing systems on the way back (honestly, the flight was an hour, I have no idea how she managed to break in an hour), so that's providing she's fixed.
Hope you're feeling okay. I think you're allowed a lazy day after all the walking we did yesterday! My legs ached a bit today, I'm glad I don't have a moving job until Thursday. I'm clearly more unfit that I thought I was.
Call me any time, I'm just going to spend the rest of the evening reading I think, so it would be brilliant to talk to you again. Miss you still.
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
Tuesday 1st May
I’ll be looking forward to that
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
I hope GERTI is fixed and you got to Dubai safely. Thank God you can only tell me about things going wrong when you’re already safely on the ground. Even then I can’t think about anything falling off the plane without shivers running down my spine.
I slept like a baby tonight – I’m sorry you picked such a bad night. No voodoo dolls in sight, so I think we can safely say that Oscar has accepted you as a member of his household :) And don’t worry, I’ll give you your beloved shirt back when you come again.
I did a bit of gardening today – I hope you like courgettes. I’ve never planted them before, but I know everyone always has more of them than they can eat, so I guess I’ll be supplying your students with them.
I spoke to Maggie today – remember, the one with the huge glasses who kept calling you Captain? – and she told me that I should hold on to you even though you’re hopeless at quizzes. And since I’d never dare to disobey her, you’re stuck with me :) She says hello.
I miss you. Is it very repetitive that I say this every time I write to you? It’s always true.
Henry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
GERTI is tough as old boots, don't worry
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Don't fret, GERTI is fine. Anti-icing isn't that bad a thing to go wrong. It's not like the time one of the engines exploded. (And that wasn't GERTI's fault – a goose flew into us. A bit terrifying, but everything was okay in the end.) (Sorry, I shouldn't have told you that.) (Please don’t worry.)
I'm not a big fan of Dubai, really. I'm glad we're not here for long. It's a beautiful place and the people are generally lovely, but it makes me feel quite anxious.
I really like courgettes, so there's no problem there. And it won't kill the students to eat more vegetables and less pizza :) Pival will be pleased, she's a veggie.
I liked Maggie, she was very sweet (if a little intense). I'm glad she approves of me, even if I am terrible at quizzes! I'll try to get better at them – and hey, I got the cricket questions! Say hello back for me. I hope her hip feels better.
I don't think it's repetitive, because I miss you too.
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
Thursday 3rd May
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Thank you so much for last night, darling. I’m sorry I woke you again. Thinking of you. <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Sorry
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
I woke up with my phone on my pillow – did you actually talk me to sleep? I’m really sorry, you sounded so sleepy, and I didn’t even realise at the time. I really thought I’d never have to take you up on that offer, but last night… The dream wasn’t about my father or me, as it usually is, but about you. I just had to hear your voice.
I’m sorry, and thank you so much for helping me. You’re wonderful. I hope you got a chance to sleep in at least.
I can’t wait to see you again.
Henry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I forgot you had a moving job today. I hope you’re not too tired. <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I’m really sorry, it was thoughtless of me. You need energy for your job. I’ll never do it again, I promise. <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Sorry, I left my phone at home. And I asked you to call me if you needed to. Emailing you now xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Bad day :(
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
I asked you to call if you needed to, so don't be sorry. I don't remember what I talked about, but it was probably rubbish – clearly, if it made you fall asleep! Hope you feel okay today.
I'm sorry I didn't text you back. I left my phone at home and I've had an absolutely awful day. I was outside in the rain for about two hours trying to fix my stupid van and I've not warmed up all day.
The bloody van wouldn't start when I'd done my moving job. It's normal, and I can usually fix it, but none of the usual things were wrong with it. Then the breakdown service arrived and it's completely dead. It'll be in the garage for days getting a new clutch, new carburettor and who knows what else. I've had to cancel all the rest of my jobs this week.
Sorry, I'm just really frustrated with it. I didn't mean to offload onto you. I don't know if it will be fixed by this weekend either, so I have no idea if I'll even be able to visit.
I'm sorry, I know you don't need this right now.
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
I wish I could hug you
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
to me
I’m really sorry about your van! I hope it gets fixed soon, and that the clients weren’t angry with you.
You could take the train on Saturday? It takes a bit longer, but it’s not so bad. I’d pick you up at the station. Or I can come to Fitton if you think that would be easier for you.
Tell me if there is anything I could do to help. And don’t apologise, I think you’ve more than earned your right to offload onto me. Call me if you want to talk.
I wish I was there to warm you up and make it at least a little better.
Henry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
I could do with a hug...
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
The van is ridiculously old – it's been old for as long as I can remember. It's a miracle it passes its MOT each year, to be honest. I had to cancel with two clients today and then three tomorrow, and they were not impressed, but what can I do? I can't magic up a new clutch.
The students are planning a “welcome home from the holiday” party this weekend, because they knew I wasn't going to be here. And train tickets are a bit... steep for me now I've lost five jobs and have practically half a new van to pay for. I'm really sorry – we might have to have a rain check?
I'm sorry, I'm not in a good mood at the moment. I don't want to dump all this on you, it's unfair.
I should go to bed. I'll feel better once I've slept, hopefully. I'm sorry, and I hope you sleep better tonight.
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
I’ll hug you as soon as I can
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
I’m so sorry things are tough for you, honey. I wish I could help. I can pay for your train ticket, that would be no trouble. But I understand if you’d rather be alone, of course. We can meet next week, or whenever it’s more convenient for you. Just remember that I’m here for you if you need anything.
I hope you feel better soon. I’ll be thinking of you. Sleep well.
Henry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
Friday 4th May
Oh God I'm so sorry
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
I was in such a bad mood yesterday, and I've just re-read the e-mail I sent you and I'm so sorry – I was so shirty with you when you were being so lovely and trying to help. I'm so sorry, I'm a git at times.
I want to see you, of course I do. I don't want to take money from you, though – I hate borrowing money from people. I know I have money issues a lot, but I get by.
Sorry, I'm a bit out of sorts today. I hope you're okay, at least.
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
Don’t worry, it’s fine
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
It’s okay, it’s understandable that you were a bit unsettled after all that. I was just a little paranoid, I think – after the nightmares and 3 am phone calls I thought you might have changed your mind after all. (You haven’t, have you? I’m sorry, this is probably silly.)
Letting me pay for your ticket wouldn’t exactly be “taking money from me” – I’d profit from it just as much as you would. And technically, it would be only fair if I paid for it – I’ve only gone to see you once, whereas this would already be your third trip here. Clearly the travel expenses aren’t divided equally. It’s simple maths :) But decide as you see fit, I don’t want to nag you. Just know that you wouldn’t owe me anything. (And you do remember that you made me a promise, don’t you?)
I’m fine – no nightmares last night, thankfully. Any news about the van?
I miss you.
Henry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
I've not changed my mind!
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Oh God, it didn't even occur to me that you'd think that. I've not changed my mind, of course I haven't! You're the best thing to ever happen to me – including the day I actually passed my CPL.
I'm sorry. I'm just so used to not telling anyone when I'm... struggling. I'm a bit too proud, and it's a situation I've brought entirely on myself, so I don't like complaining about it or admitting that I'm having a hard time. I really don't want to worry you, but I know I made you a promise.
It's not a good time at the moment. There haven't been many MJN trips, which usually means I can fill my time with moving jobs and get a bit of money behind me. But I've lost a lot with having to cancel these last jobs, and the van repairs are going to be so expensive. And it's such an old van, with so many things wrong with it, that I'm worried they'll just want to write it off entirely. It's insured, of course, but what I'd get from the insurance wouldn't replace it, so my entire income would just go up in smoke. That probably won't happen, and I'll manage to make ends meet somehow just like I always do, but it's making me very anxious at the moment. I don't want to go back to eating one meal a day just to get by. (God, I sound so pathetic. I'm sorry.)
I'm just too proud for my own good. What I want more than anything right now is to see you, and I'm shooting myself in the foot. Are you sure it's all right if you get my ticket? I'm pretty desperate to get away from here at the moment.
I'm so glad you slept okay. And thank you so much for being so understanding and lovely with me when I'm being an irrational idiot. I really don't want to worry you.
I miss you so much.
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
I’m better than passing your CPL? You flatterer!
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
I’m sorry, it was silly. I just tend to expect the worst. You’re the best thing to ever happen to me too, and I’m so happy to have you.
I’m never letting you eat just one meal a day, no need to worry about that. I’ll give you weekly supplies of risotto and pancakes if it’s the only way to go. I really hope things turn out well with your van, but if they don’t, we’ll think of something. I promise. You aren’t alone anymore, darling. If the only thing I can do to help you at the moment is buy a train ticket, I’ll do just that, and I’ll do more when it’s necessary. Thank you for telling me, and try not to worry too much if you can.
And you are not pathetic or an idiot. You are wonderful, and you have a right to be upset from time to time.
I’ll see you tomorrow, then! I’m so glad you’re coming. It makes the rest of today look so much better. I’ll call you later if that’s all right? I feel like we haven’t talked for far too long.
Henry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Thank you so much. You’re wonderful. I apologise if I cry at you when you call - I’m all over the place. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
Saturday 5th May
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Do you think it will make your train go faster if I’m at the station two hours early? xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I think this is the slowest train in existence. An hour still to go! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
Friday 11th May
From Russia with Love – except I'm still in Fitton
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Hello, sweetheart :)
I hope you're okay, and that Oscar's not pulled his stitches out yet. Have you worked out what he did? Has he stopped sulking with you yet?
I'm not especially looking forward to my trip. Russia is the dullest country on the surface of the planet, and it never, ever seems to end. It's not as though we're going somewhere big like St Petersburg or Moscow – no one has even heard of Udachny. I'll get you a fridge magnet or something. Or would you prefer a furry Russian hat? I'm sure you could make it work.
I'd best get some sleep. I'll try and e-mail or call you as soon as I can when I land! Sleep well. I miss you.
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
I hope Russia proves less boring this time
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Oscar breaks my heart, poor darling. He has to wear a wide collar to stop him from biting at the wound, he hates it and he’s all miserable. And I can’t find out where he hurt himself and it’s driving me mad because how am I supposed to make sure it doesn’t happen again? I hate seeing him like this.
Please don’t buy me any furry hats, I would look completely ridiculous (not to mention that you really shouldn’t waste money on presents for me). The best thing you can get me is coming back soon :) I googled Udachny and it doesn’t seem very interesting. Why are you even flying there? I hope you win some word games at least!
I miss you too.
Henry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
Saturday 12th May
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
How was your flight? Not too dull, I hope. Oscar is better today. Miss you xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
From: 901
You have (1) new voicemail. Dial 901 to retrieve.
It’s really backwoods, isn’t it?
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
Is there no phone signal in Udachny? I can’t reach you. Please let me know you’re all right. You know I get worried for no reason. You must have landed hours ago now.
Henry xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
From: 901
You have (2) new voicemails. Dial 901 to retrieve.
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Martin, are you all right? Please let me know that you’re all right. Xxxxxxxxxx
From: 901
You have (3) new voicemails. Dial 901 to retrieve.
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I tried calling Carolyn and I can’t reach her either. Please be okay.
From: 901
You have (4) new voicemails. Dial 901 to retrieve.
Sunday 13th May
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Herc Shipwright contacted me. Apparently you never reached Udachny. I don’t know what to do.
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I didn’t even know I was your emergency contact. I don’t want this to be an emergency.
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I can’t lose you. I don’t know what I would do. Please be all right. I love you.
From: 901
You have (7) new voicemails. Dial 901 to retrieve.
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
They are looking for you. I’m on my way. I’ve hired a plane and left Oscar with Maggie because of you so you have to be all right. You have to.
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
Martin
Chapter 6: Epilogue
Notes:
Many thanks to Bri for beta services, and to everyone else for the amazing response!
Chapter Text
Russia hates us
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
Henry,
Sorry I’ve only just got in contact!
There's no phone signal here at all but we've finally managed to get to a hotel that at least has internet access – although it could do with a bit more heating since it's in the bloody Arctic Circle. I know you must be worried sick, but I promise I'm all right. I'm a bit shaken up, but I'm okay. Basically GERTI had an engine failure on the way, and we had to do an emergency landing in a deserted airfield in Usinsk. It was a bit scary for a while, but we're all okay. Not sure about poor old GERTI though. She doesn't have much luck in Russia.
We don't know how long we'll be here, because we don't know how long it's going to take to get someone here to fix GERTI – if she can be fixed. If she can't then we're going to have to figure out a way to get home.
I hope you're okay, and I'll e-mail you again when I know a bit more about what's going on.
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Monday 14th May
Henry?
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
I’m probably being silly, but you’ve normally replied by now. Are you okay, sweetheart?
Martin xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
Re: Henry?
Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
To me
We were informed via satcom that you were found. I nearly collapsed with relief. My hands are shaking. Tell me the name of your hotel. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Re: Re: Henry?
From me
to Henry Knight henryk_night@gmail.com
You’re in Russia? Why on earth did you come out here!? Oh Christ. I’m sorry! I guess we went off the radar.
We’re at the Lukoil-Komi Hotel. You won’t miss it, it’s the only one here. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From: Arthur Shappey (07700900410)
Skip your boyfriend is brilliant!!! It was like in a film when you ran towards each other!!! Mum thinks its brilliant that he found us a better hotel and they sell really good sweets at the reception but not as good as toblerones and i can text you because theirs signal so im texting you!!!
From: Arthur Shappey (07700900410)
Mum says i should stop bothering you but i forgot to tell you that im really happy for you skip!!! We can go on double dates now you and henry and me and dixie it will be brilliant!!!
From: Douglas Richardson (07875676532)
Your knight in shining armour seems acceptable. Please accept my blessings as the magnificent compliment they are intended to be.
From: Carolyn Knapp-Shappey (07786933612)
You seem to have achieved the impossible and found someone who is sane and yet interested in you. I’d offer my congratulations but then you’d no doubt go and mess it up straightaway, so I’ll say this: being lovestruck is no excuse for tardiness. 8 am sharp tomorrow.
To: Arthur Shappey (07700900410)
Thank you, Arthur. I’m glad you like Henry :) I’ll have to see about the double dates...
To: Douglas Richardson (07875676532)
Thank you, I’m glad we have your godlike acceptance... though I do genuinely have to thank you for inadvertently getting us to meet. I’ll forgive you for that prank.
To: Carolyn Knapp-Shappey (07786933612)
Thank you. I think. I’m never late, and I am not going to mess it up! But thank you.
Tuesday 15th May
To: Henry Knight (07700900389)
I’m rubbish at saying things like this in person, but you’re asleep so I’ll do it like this. Thank you for everything. I love you. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
From: Henry Knight (07700900389)
At least this way I have written proof :) I’m thinking about joining you in the shower. I hope you won’t throw me out :) I love you too, very much. Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <3
*************
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