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John Egbert had been dating Vriska Serket for about a week now and they hadn’t really kissed (read: made out) that much. Well, yeah, it had only been a week, but they’d been awesome cool best buds for months now! And yeah, they’d kissed a week ago, when they decided to stop beating around the bush and finally just ‘go out’ together. 

Not that it was any different from before, and he didn’t mind it at all! But John thought it might be kind of cool to do the whole kissing thing. Maybe. In any case, Dave hadn’t gotten off his case about it once.

Tonight, he was going to do it. He was making her a romantic dinner of Easy Mac and hot dogs and they were going to watch movies and it was going to be really awesome! And at one point, he was going to get some kind of kiss there. Yeah.

So there he was.  At dinner. And they were flicking mac and cheese noodles at each other, giggling and snorting at how ridiculous (read: cool) they were. John looked over at her, cheese all over her smirking lips and a noodle sticking to her weird half-lense glasses. 

Maybe now could work? Now could totally work! Yeah, it totally could!

He leaned forward, totally ready to do this he could do this, and  he was going to--

and then a spider seemed to drop from the ceiling, landing on his nose.

He did not proceed to flip the fuck out, nor did he fall backwards in his chair, hitting the ground with a thump. 

And Vriska did not burst into loud, snorting laughter.

None of this happened.

Okay so all of this happened and basically it was the most embarrassing moment of his entire life, all fifteen years of it.

And he had no idea where the spider was now, hands scrambling over his face and torso to brush it off, and Vriska just laughed and laughed. “Just sit there and laugh, Vriska! That’s totally cool! It’s not like one of those creepy spiders you love so much is now trying to defile my innocence as we speak!” 

She was crying from laughing so hard, holding up two of her fingers that had something pinched between them.

A string with a horribly realistic spider hanging from it.

Holy shit.

“Sor-ry, John. Couldn’t resist myself. Guess I‘ve been hanging out with you too much, hm?” She set the gag spider on the table, walking over to help him up.

He grasped her outstretched hand and found himself jerked forward and suddenly her always-smirking lips were on his own, pressed together.

Holy shit.

His heart was pounding far more than it ever should, it seemed, because wow his second kiss with a girl ever. And it was with Vriska Serket. After a really good prank. Holy shit. This wasn’t happening.

Except it was, it really was, and he was definitely the luckiest kid in the world.

Best. Second kiss. Ever.