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In Which the Han Dynasty Completely Lacks Heterosexuality

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Doctor Mulock aka Doctor Mulanlock aka Mulan Wholock aka I’llMakeAManOutOfWholock aka What Lexi Does During Movie Night

It all started with that strange man, with his blue police box. In reality, of course, he seemed no stranger than Sherlock—that was a bit hard to do—except for the fact that he had no name. Just “The Doctor”. And at least he seemed to know that the earth went around the sun. In fact, he seemed to know quite a lot about the universe.
And nothing about time whatsoever, though he seemed insistent that he was some sort of expert.
What an expert, taking them to China during the Han Dynasty.
And now he simply expected them to go wander off and find some sort of adventure while he examined that odd blue box.
They did, of course. Well, he did, John. If you could call it an adventure at all.
Mostly it was just trying to have a conversation with an army that seemed to want nothing more than to insult his sweater as Sherlock searched for some way to find a real adventure, scanning the crowd of men like he would be able to tell simply from their faces which one was the most interesting.
Of course, he probably could.
John, however, had concluded that talking to the man who introduced himself as Shang would be the most thrilling thing he could do while stuck here.
“So, what’s it like?”
“I’m sorry?”
“You know, with a guy.”
“You’re not—I mean… We’re—I… I’m not gay.”
Shang raised an eyebrow. “Really?”
“And even if—”
“You’re sure?” Shang asked. “Positive?”
Luckily (or unluckily, considering the unconcealed snort from Shang that suggested nothing less than extreme doubt), Sherlock appeared once more, apparently having found the most interesting men of the lot.
“He’s a she.”
“What?”
“The man you’re in love with. He’s a woman.”
“We really should be going now…”
Before leaving, the last thing John heard was a mutter. Something that sounded oddly like “It’s still your problem.”