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I am the Very Model of a Hawkeye/Coulson Devotee

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I am the very model of a Hawkeye/Coulson devotee
I read fic of all the ratings and I do it very gleefully
I follow FYCC and I've AO3 subscriptions set
So every time my authors post, it never will escape my net!

I'm very well acquainted, too, with all the fics that have been done
I'll quote them very happily from Mindset to Triskelion.
I cry over Manitoba and I'm teeming with a lot o' feels
But I still cannot fathom that that spider fic is really real!

But she still cannot fathom that that spider fic is really real!
But she still cannot fathom that that spider fic is really real!
But she still cannot fathom that that spider fic is really really real!

I've read all of the crack AUs and then I also wrote a few.
When Fury's Big Week 6 came out, I made such a hullabaloo
In short in all things fanfic, and the art, and metatext and squee,
I am the very model of a Hawkeye/Coulson devotee!

In short in all things fanfic, and the art, and metatext and squee,
She is the very model of a Hawkeye/Coulson devotee!

I treasure forty-seven seconds of that certain movie, Thor
I understand debriefings and why paperwork is not a bore.
I really love some sleeveless vests and think that arrows are for me
Because I've done some research that goes into proper archery!

The canon and the fanon I can justify inside my head
I've stayed up reading longfic when I really should have been in bed
And then all over tumblr, yes, my OTP I will instill
And if they ask I totally believe in Pufferclint and Fill!

And if they ask she totally believes in Pufferclint and Fill
And if they ask she totally believes in Pufferclint and Fill
And if they ask she totally believes in Pufferclint and clint and Fill!

I read the college AUs and can name a dozen deathfics, too.
I also love the side characters like Sitwell and Jimmy Woo.
In short in all things fanfic, and the art, and metatext and squee,
I am the very model of a Hawkeye/Coulson devotee!

In short in all things fanfic, and the art, and metatext and squee,
She is the very model of a Hawkeye/Coulson devotee!

I follow Clark Gregg's twitter and have all his tweets sent to my phone
I dream of crazy plot bunnies in every second I'm alone.
But then of course that solitude is not exactly where it's at
'Cuz, to be frank, I spend all of my waking moments in feelschat.

And one day when I write the fic that puts me with the BNFs
Instead of silly AUs in which Phil and Clint are sushi chefs
In short, the day I finally can wrangle all the love and feels,
They'll say I've met all of the Hawkeye/Coulson devotee ideals!

They'll say she's met all of the Hawkeye/Coulson devotee ideals!
They'll say she's met all of the Hawkeye/Coulson devotee ideals!
They'll say she's met all of the Hawkeye/Coulson devo-devotee ideals!

I don't know how this happened, how I fell into this small pairing
It's just the fact that all the other fans of it have such caring
But now I'm here I know that there's no chance that I will ever leave
And maybe one day we will be more popular than Tony/Steve!

But now she's here she knows that there's no chance she will ever leave
And maybe one day we will be more popular than Tony/Steve!