“I’d have a threesome with them,” Ginny whispered.
I turned, startled. Not only was that ridiculously forward and uncharacteristic for the Gryffindor, but I was embarrassed to be caught staring at the pair.
At her words, heat shot from my upper abdomen to a pool near where I suspect my uterus is. Electrifying and almost painful in intensity, it made my head spin.
“Ginny,” I hissed. “Keep those ridiculous sentiments in your head, where they belong. Better yet, out of there as well!”
She smirked at me. Sometimes I think the sorting hat knows nothing at all, and this particular Weasley belonged in Slytherin. That expression has no place sharing a common room, or a house table with me.
But her words stuck with me. It was a thought that had never occurred to me. I had a crush on one of them, a fairly well known one I’d admit, but the other was only beginning to intrigue me. The attraction was strictly physical, I assure you.
It’s a strange thing. I had been thinking of them individually until now (which, now that I think about it, makes no sense whatsoever; obviously I couldn’t have them both separately, one after the other. Imagine the ruckus that would cause in this gossip-starving student body.) But as a team…oh, there’s that bolt of heat again.
But threesomes never happen in real life. They’re an urban legend, or something that happens to celebrities or to those who hire prostitutes. What kind of situation would possibly call for a threesome between Hermione Granger, Harry Potter, and Draco Malfoy?
It’s not that I can’t stop thinking about it. I obviously have much better things to do with my time. It’s just that it keeps popping into my head when I’m not thinking of anything else, for even a second. Like, right before bed, or walking around the castle.
I think the reason this threesome thing is so hot, is because Ginny’s right. Not only are Harry and Malfoy supremely attractive and coveted males on their own, but the tension between them is phenomenal. It’s obvious they’d build off of each other in bed, just the same as they do when they banter in real life. And really, turning those glares into pupil-dilated looks of lust is not much of a stretch.
Ugh, all of my subconscious energy is being wasted on making this happen.
THIS IS SO UNREALISTIC, I WISH I COULD BURN THE MENTAL IMAGE OUT OF MY HEAD AND FORGET ABOUT IT.
Honestly, unless I magic them into my bedchamber, there is no way in the universe this will ever happen.
If I use magic as part of my ploy, it’s not thoroughly unethical, is it?
And learning contraception spells, lubrication spells, as well as a few “other” spells is not too forward. It’s proactive. Why don’t we learn these spells in classes? Seem useful and necessary to me.
Leave it to McGonagall to give us less than 3 months warning before this Ball. Honestly, the way she delivered the news, like she had bitten into a Warhead (sorry, muggle candy) was enough to turn me off of it altogether. Actually, if it weren’t for my little “plan” setting off firecrackers in my brain, I probably would have turned up my nose at the whole ordeal. But as it is, I have been swept up by the same ghastly girlishness that possesses my dorm-mates.
Under threat of death, I suppose I might say that I’m kind of looking forward to the whole thing.