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Just one moment

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Adam was startled awake when he heard Tommy’s labored breaths next to him. He moved closer, holding the man in his arms, knowing it would not be much longer now. The time he has been dreading for so long is facing him and he knows what he has to do for Tommy.

“Please just let go, baby, it will be okay and I will survive,” Adam paused as the stream of tears fell down his cheeks, “I will love you forever, Tommy Joe.”

He leaned down slowly and kissed him gently just before Tommy took his final breath of life.


The days after were a fog filled with people and whispers and everyone telling Adam where to be next. He was grateful for them all, but all he really wanted was to jump back in time, to hold his love for just one moment. He was sure he would always want just one moment.

As Tommy’s casket was slowly lowered into the ground, Adam fell to his knees, unable to breath, unable to feel, and pretty sure unable to live without him.

By the time his friends were by his side, he was sobbing harder than he ever has before.


When we awoke the next morning, he found Isaac in his living room and Sophie in his kitchen.

“Morning?” He asked, looking at them with a confused look on his face.

Sophie walked over, giving him a hug. The look on her face told him everything he needed to know.

“Tommy…” he whispered to her. She nodded slowly before letting him go.

He felt numb and lost as he moved around his house with Isaac and Sophie trying to be there without being overwhelming. He found himself wandering around the house, touching everything that might have Tommy’s fingerprints on it.


He found the box that Tommy was working on, the one that he was not allowed to touch. He gasped when he opened it; it was filled with so much love. Adam carried it over to the bed, sitting against the headboard as he pulled everything out slowly.

He cried through his pain and smiled as he saw their life laid out before him when the box was almost empty. Opening the final envelope, he found a note about videos and a card taped to it. He rushed to his computer, sobbing as he saw Tommy appear speaking to him.


Adam sat at his computer and carefully typed out the words ‘I guess it's finally time to tell you all’ before attaching the link to Tommy’s video. He shut his lap top immediately, not waiting to see the fans reactions to Tommy’s death, to the video he left them, but mostly for keeping them all in the dark.

He sat there unable to move, unable to think as he just let the tears fall down his face until he felt warmness overcome him. His love was gone, but he was sure that he would always be there with him somehow.