Tommy doesn't get why the AMA show is at all remarkable. Unfortunately nobody, with the possible exception of Adam, seems to agree.
He's on the phone with his younger sister two hours after the show, and their conversation goes something like this:
"How are you?" she asks.
"Pretty good. You?"
"Oh, I'm fine. So is it true that you didn't know what Adam was going to do ahead of time?"
Tommy rolled his eyes. "It certainly wasn't specifically planned. Though something milder was. But knowing Adam at all means, well. It didn't really come as a surprise."
"So are you two dating now?"
"What! No, no, of course not."
"Introduce me to him, then?"
"Umm. Look, he's gay, remember? You're female."
"You kissed him, and you're straight - theoretically."
"Yeah, for the sake of the performance. It didn't mean anything."
Tommy could almost hear her pout. "It doesn't have to mean anything with me."
"Look, maybe I'll introduce you - not in that way - if you actually make it to one of his shows. How are mom and dad?"
"Taking the news that their only son is gay surprisingly well."
"Kidding. I always knew they'd be cool with it."
"Love you too, Tommy."
His sister and the media aren't the only ones making a big deal out of nothing. Tommy's date that Friday goes something like this:
"What's it like being famous?" she asks over their first drinks. She has a nervous giggle that Tommy thinks is supposed to be endearing. It's not.
"I think at this point I'm more infamous. I doubt most people know my name, they just know of me in connection with Adam Lambert."
"You two pretty close friends?"
"Yes." Tommy is pretty sure it's a bad sign that they're talking about Adam.
"How is he as a kisser?"
Tommy shrugs, annoyed at the question. "Decent enough, I suppose. I'm better."
She laughs at that, like she thinks he's trying to be cute. She doesn't give him a chance to prove it.
Adam seems to think it's funny that at the same time Tommy is dealing with the apparently irritating consequences of the kiss he's outraged at Adam's suggestion that they back off a little during performances:
"No. Absolutely not. You shouldn't have to avoid who you are."
"Trust me, Tommy, I don't," Adam says. "But I don't want to force you into a role you're uncomfortable with."
"I'm not uncomfortable," Tommy says, and that's that.
Adam clearly doesn't believe him, though, because he starts acting a little weird. Tommy finds himself initiating all their on-stage antics. The crowd still loves them, though, so he doesn't feel any pressure to stop. Except from Adam:
"You know," Adam says after one of their performances. "It's really hard for me not to take this as flirting."
"Well?" Adam asks.
"Not really my problem," Tommy says. "I'm sure you'll be fine."
Funnily enough, things seem to get better after that. Nothing has really changed, but Adam seems less afraid of going too far, or infringing on Tommy's freedom, which was what Tommy wanted. He can take care of himself. He doesn't need anyone to tiptoe around him.
More and more people tend to assume he's gay, but Tommy's starting to be more and more sure that the word 'gay' doesn't mean anything more to him than the word 'straight' does. Because sometimes people don't let you know their gender, and does that mean no one is ever attracted to them? Or does it just mean gender is a little more fluid than people assume?
He's still trying to work everything out in his head, but he's growing a little more sure of himself, and a lot more sure that he could spend his whole life doing this, if anyone would let him. One of his newspaper interviews goes very much like this:
"How are you feeling about the pressures of performing?" the journalist asks.
"I think it's going okay," Tommy says. "I mean, obviously there's still some uncertainty, but the crowds certainly seem to like us, and really, that's all we need."
"Do you feel that the tours have take a toll on your personal life?"
"Of course I do."
"Care to elaborate?"
"I mean, it's not like working nine to five in a supermarket wouldn't take a toll on my personal life, right? So whatever the consequences are of touring with Adam...I'd rather be here than in a supermarket any day of the year."
They haven't kissed since the AMA show, but the crowd tonight has been more friendly than normal, and they're in Texas, of all the places in the world to be, so Tommy lets the thrill of the moment carry him into a kiss with Adam. And Adam, whatever his protestations off stage will be, is in control on the stage; he needs to be. So he quickly takes control of the kiss, and turns it into something even more than what they'd had the first time.
Once they're done, though, Adam is looking at Tommy with worried eyes, and Tommy doesn't want to talk about it. They have to talk, though, and Adam catches up with Tommy after the show. Their conversation goes something like this:
"Care to explain to me what happened out there?" Adam asks.
"I think I'm attracted to you," Tommy says.
"Oh," Adam says. "What do you want to do about it?"
"I was thinking you could show me how you really kiss," Tommy starts. "Because I've heard it's several kinds of impressive, but I don't know that what I've seen on stage is all that."
Adam snorts. "I'm never anything but impressive," he says.
Nothing changes, just because he's in a relationship with Adam. Everyone Tommy tries to tell is convinced it was already happening, though they are pleased he isn't denying it anymore. The thing is, he tries to get upset over the fact that no one believes him, but he's too happy that he has Adam now.