“You have got to be kidding me,” Shindou cried, dodging the roundhouse kick his opponent had aimed at his head. “You think that I would stake you for that?”
Akira landed an uppercut to his own opponent’s jaw. “Will you stop talking, Shindou? You’re going to get me killed!”
“You’re a vampire,” Shindou retorted, sweeping the demon’s feet out from under it. “And if that sweater didn’t kill you, that demon isn’t going to.”
The demon Akira was fighting paused and growled. “You do not think I could kill the traitor, Slayer?” it demanded.
“Oh, by all means, go ahead,” the Slayer quipped, swinging his sword in a graceful arc and beheading his opponent. “But I really don’t think you can.”
“Then watch me, Slayer,” it replied arrogantly. “You shall watch the vampire disappear into dust before your eyes.”
Shindou smiled and hopped onto a tombstone, carefully replacing his sword in his back sheathe. “I’ll buy you a burger if you can.”
“Shindou!” Akira exclaimed before being thrown into the wall of a mausoleum. He stood up and dusted himself off, letting his fangs extend. “You ripped my new vest,” he snarled at the demon. “Akiko-san is going to be upset.”
“I’m certainly not,” Shindou leered before addressing the demon. “Hell, I’ll let you snack on Ochi if you completely destroy that hideous thing he calls a vest.”
Akira glared at Shindou before launching himself at the demon. He dodged a punch to his gut and landed a kick to the demon’s head. The demon staggered back, roaring in anger. Akira took a step forward and vaulted into the air, placing both hand on either side of the demon’s neck. He twisted and heard a satisfying crack as the demon’s neck broke. He landed gracefully on his feet while the demon’s body fell to the floor in a heap.
“Took you long enough,” Waya muttered, appearing from behind the mausoleum, Isumi behind him.
“Waya,” Isumi began and Akira watched as Waya rolled his eyes.
Shindou was by his side, nudging the dead demon idly. “Too bad,” he said. “I really wouldn’t have minded feeding Ochi to him.”
Akira heard Waya snicker and saw Isumi shoot the other man a warning look. Isumi smiled apologetically as Shindou said, “I could always feed him to Touya.”
“I will not eat him, Shindou,” Akira replied, face wrinkling in disgust as his fangs retracted. “Besides, isn’t the Slayer supposed to protect humans?”
“Ochi isn’t human,” Waya said.
“He’s a demon,” Shindou agreed.
Akira shook his head. “Ochi-kun is human, therefore under your protection, Shindou.”
Shindou rolled his eyes. “Whatever. We have to get rid of these bodies.”
“You have to get rid of them,” Akira corrected, narrowing his eyes. “I just agreed to help kill them.”
“You only agreed because you can’t harm humans anymore,” Shindou replied evenly. “You can help me get rid of them since you helped kill them.”
“I have other obligations,” Akira said pleasantly. “Besides, they are your responsibility. Isumi-san and Waya-kun can help you get rid of them.”
Yashiro and Sai came running toward them as Shindou opened his mouth to reply.
“I missed it again,” Yashiro grumbled, kicking the decapitated demon.
“You killed them, Hikaru!” Sai exclaimed happily, running around his charge.
“Of course I did,” Shindou retorted, waving his Watcher off. “No thanks to Touya.”
“I beg your pardon?” Akira exclaimed. “I do believe that is my dead demon your foot is molesting.”
“What?” Shindou screeched. “I don’t molest demons with my toe or anything else!”
“Ho ho ho!’ a voice cackled, and Akira turned quickly and bowed.
“Kuwabara,” Shindou said, grabbing a stake from his back pocket. “And Ogata.”
Akira turned and glared. “Put your stake away.”
“What? They’re vampires, Touya! It’s my job to kill them!” Shindou exclaimed.
Yashiro grinned, pulling out a stake, as well. “Mine, too,” he added cheerfully.
“So am I, Shindou. Are you going to kill me, as well?” Akira retorted.
“Of course not, Touya. You’re a good vampire. Though I would like to stake your clothes,” he added. “You think they’d disintegrate, Yashiro?”
“I don’t know,” Yashiro said. “I hope so. They’re ugly.”
“They are not,” Akira argued. “I’ll have you know that they are very comfortable.”
“On an old man, maybe,” Yashiro replied. “Oh wait, I forgot. You are one.” He turned around and glared at the cemetery. “But not as old as the bastard hiding behind the angel statue,” he called out.
Akira sighed. “Who else is here, Ogata-san?”
“Ko,” Ogata replied disinterestedly, taking a drag of his cigarette.
“And Kouyo-kun,” Kuwabara cackled.
Kouyo appeared from the mausoleum at the same time Ko came out from behind the statue.
“Long time no see, chibi,” Ko drawled, smirking.
“Don’t call me that,” Yashiro hissed.
“What the hell?” Waya yelled. “I told you Touya was a bastard that couldn’t be trusted,” he called to Shindou, who was standing face to face with Ogata.
“Not now, Waya,” Shindou called back. “I have to kill the pedo vamp.”
Ogata sighed and put out his cigarette. “I had hoped that Akira would be the one to kill you, Slayer,” he replied drolly.
“Touya wouldn’t hurt me,” Shindou replied evenly, pausing to think. “I take it back,” he added. “His clothes hurt my eyes every time I see them.”
Yashiro and Waya snickered as Akira rounded on Shindou. “I beg your pardon?”
“Must be why they end up on the Slayer’s floor,” Ko chimed in, smirking at Yashiro. “If I didn’t know any better, chibi, I’d think you weren’t happy to see me.”
“My clothes do not!” Akira cried, turning to face Ko.
“I’m not happy to see you, you bastard!” Yashiro yelled, face turning red. “When have I ever been happy to see you?”
“Last night,” Ko replied helpfully.
Akira rolled his eyes and turned his attention to Kouyo and Kuwabara. “What’s going on, Kuwabara-sama, Kouyo-san?”
Kuwabara cackled, grinning. “We just wanted to have some fun, right, Kouyo-kun?”
Kouyo nodded, eyes trained on Shindou and Ogata. “The Slayer has improved. He is giving Seiji-kun an actual fight.”
“We’ve been training daily,” Akira said.
“Is that so?” Kouyo murmured, watching as Shindou landed an uppercut under Ogata’s chin, while Ogata retaliated with a jab to Shindou’s gut.
“Hey! I’ve been training with Shindou, too!” Yashiro interjected. “We spar during the day.”
“I’m sure Yashiro-kun has been a great help to Shindou’s development as well,” Akira added politely.
“The chibi can fight?” Ko asked, amused. “Doesn’t seem like it to me.”
“Bastard, I can totally kick your ass!”
Kuwabara grinned. “Care to take me on, Slayer?”
Akira saw Yashiro pause. Ko was suddenly behind Yashiro, pulling the newer Slayer against his chest.
“I do hate to be rude, Kuwabara-sama,” Ko drawled, “but I do believe I’ve staked my claim on this one.”
“No one is willing to give this old man a good fight,” Kuwabara groused.
“I told you,” Shindou shouted, “that he’s a pedophile!”
Akira whirled around to see Shindou pressed up against a mausoleum wall, with Ogata’s face pressed against Shindou’s neck. Akira sighed and moved forward.
“Wait,” Kuwabara said. “You shouldn’t be moving to help the Slayer, Akira-kun.”
“GOD DAMN BLOOD BREATH, 80S MOVIE REJECT PEDOPHILE!” Shindou yelled, breaking free of Ogata’s grasp. One of Shindou’s hands went directly to his neck, but Akira smelled the blood before Shindou’s palm came away.
Akira was immediately in between the two, fangs extended. He heard Waya and Isumi shouting at Shindou to move away, but Shindou moved to stand next to Akira.
“He’s mine,” Shindou snarled. “I’m not a blood donor, blood breath.”
“Your blood is rather thin, very unappetizing,” Ogata replied drolly. “However, your fighting is formidable.”
Shindou glared at him. “Where’s my sword?”
Akira heard Shindou’s Watcher sigh. “Didn’t I tell you to always bring your weapons, Hikaru? Honestly, so unprepared.”
“Your sword is on the ground near the demon,” Ogata pointed out helpfully.
“I do apologize for Hikaru,” Sai was saying to Kuwabara and Kouyo. “It’s such an inconvenience to you to have to wait for him to be ready.”
Kuwabara cackled. “The Watcher is apologizing to us, Kouyo-kun.”
“I’ll destroy you, you damn pedophile!” Shindou yelled as Ogata dodged the swing of the Slayer’s sword.
“Will you stop TOUCHING ME?” Yashiro shouted, getting a good kick in on Ko, who returned the favor by punching the younger Slayer in the face and ruffling his hair.
Isumi and Waya were watching the entire thing with expressions of horror [Isumi] and glee [Waya].
If the dead could get headaches, Akira reasoned that he would have one the size of Ko’s and Shindou’s egos.
“I’m leaving,” he announced to no one in particular, and left.
He was halfway back to the warehouse they were using as a resting place during the day when he remembered his sweater vest.
Akiko would be waiting for him.
Quickly, he turned around and made his way back to the cemetery. If he was lucky, he could get swept up in the fight and get some injuries that would take Akiko’s mind off the ruined sweater vest.
Or, he thought, maybe he could find a nice, quiet crypt, and hide until the following evening when he could go the mall and replace it.
That way, he could bribe Shindou with video games, and then force Shindou to buy the replacement.
Then, it would be an ugly sweater vest Shindou bought him.
With a smile, Akira went off to find a crypt to stay the night in.