Chapter Text
Chapter 17
Half Empty
arsenicCatnip [AC] began trolling apocalypseArisen [AA].
AC: :33 < *ac furry quietly and sneakily cr33ps up behind the unsuspecting aa*
AA: what
AC: :33 < *she crouches down, wiggling her butt a little in anticipation, then leaps at the robot girl furom behind!!*
AA: what d0 y0u want
AC: :33 < *but her attack is foiled when she gets all caught up in aas long tangled hair!*
AA: what is the p0int 0f this
AC: :33 < *ac struggles in vain to fr33 herself furom the mess of metallic strands, only succ33ding in entangling herself d33purr!*
AA: 0k st0p
AA: this is stupid
AC: :33 < okay okay fine
AA: thank y0u
AA: n0w what d0 y0u want
AC: :33 < i just wanted to talk is all!
AC: :33 < im your serfur player after all
AC: :33 < its my respawnsibility to check up on you efurry now and again!
AA: is this a shipping sweep
AC: :33 < er
AC: :33 < maybe?
AA: n0
AC: :33 < what?
AA: just f0rget it
AA: i will n0t be participating
AC: :33 < what
AC: :33 < youre not purrticipating in my shipping sw33ps?
AA: im n0t participating in y0ur shipping in general
AC: :33 < why not!!!!
AA: because its stupid
AA: and p0intless
AA: and a waste 0f time
AA: shall i g0 0n
AC: :33 < rrrgh its not stupid!!!!
AC: :33 < aradia just give me a chance here!
AC: :33 < just one minute, thats all im asking fur!
AA: hm
AA: ill meet y0u in the middle
AA: ill give y0u fifteen sec0nds
AC: :33 < fift33n seconds??
AC: :33 < how is that m33ting me in the middle????
AA: because i want the thirty sec0nds y0uve already wasted back
AC: :33 < okay fine
AC: :33 < aradia i realize you think shipping is stupid and a waste of time but it really isnt!
AC: :33 < ive shipped others and theyre all really happy now!
AC: :33 < and efurrypawdy deserves to be happy and youre no exception!
AC: :33 < so if you let me ship you ill be really helpful
AC: :33 < and not only will you be really happy but youll make other people happy too!
AA: 0k
AA: times up
AC: :33 < so will you let me?
AA: hmm
AA: n0
AC: :33 < oh come on!!!! >:((
AA: im bl0cking y0u n0w
AA: d0nt try t0 c0ntact me again
AC: :33 < aradia wait!!!!!!!!
apocalypseArisen [AA] ceased trolling arsenicCatnip [AC]
AA: hm
apocalypseArisen [AA] began trolling gallowsCalibrator [GC]
AA: hey
GC: OH H3Y 4R4D14!
GC: WH4TS UP?
GC: DON3 4NY MOR3 1NV3ST1G4T1NG?
AA: um
AA: s0me yes
GC: 4W3SOM3! >:]
GC: W4NT TO TRY TO SORT 1T OUT TOG3TH3R?
GC: W3 COULD J4M ON 1T 4 L1TTL3
GC: 3R
GC: FUCK, PR3T3ND 1 D1DNT S4Y TH4T
AA: pretend y0u didnt say what
GC: NOTH1NG!!!
AA: 0_0
AA: terezi y0ure acting really weird
AA: is s0mething wr0ng
GC: NO, 3V3RYTH1NGS F1N3
GC: 1M JUST
GC: 1N 4 W31RD MOOD, 1 GU3SS
AA: 0h
AA: is n0w a bad time
GC: NO NO NO 1TS TH3 P3RF3CT T1M3
GC: LOOK C4N YOU JUST SHOW M3 4 L1TTL3 R3SP3CT 4ND 4SSUM3 TH4T FOR TH3 P4ST F1FT33N S3CONDS 1 W4S T3MPOR4R1LY B31NG 1N3XPL1C4BLY R3T4RD3D
GC: TH4TS WH4T 4 R34L FR13ND WOULD DO
AA: 0h
AA: 0k i guess
GC: TH4NK YOU
AA: sh0uld i sh0w further sensitivity by casting suspici0n 0n the intellectual merit 0f everything else y0uve ever said
GC: Y3S!
GC: 4FT3R 4LL, WH4T 4R3 FR13NDS FOR?
AA: hm
AA: are we friends
GC: 4R4D14 TH4T 1S SUCH 4 S1LLY QU3ST1ON
GC: OF COURS3 W3R3 FR13NDS!
GC: DO NOT TRY TO PL4Y YOUR 3MOT1ONL3SS ROBOT G1RL 4CT 4ND PR3T3ND L1K3 YOU W3R3 TOT4LLY 1GNOR4NT TO TH3 OBV1OUS FR13NDSH1P T4K1NG PL4C3 H3R3
AA: ha
AA: it wasnt ign0rance th0ugh
AA: m0re like skepticism
GC: SO
GC: YOU W1LLFULLY D3N13D TH4T 1 M1GHT CONS1D3R YOU MY FR13ND
AA: er
AA: thats kind 0f an insensitive thing t0 say isnt it
AA: s0rry i wasnt trying t0 0ffend y0u
GC: 4R4D14 PL34S3
GC: 1F TH4TS YOUR 1D34 OF OFF3NS3 B31NG M4D3 TH3N 1 HON3STLY H4V3 TO WORRY FOR YOU
AA: 0h
AA: 0k
GC: BL4R 4NYW4Y!
GC: W3R3 G3TT1NG OFF TOP1C H3R3
GC: L3TS T4LK 4BOUT TH3S3 T1M3L1N3 SH3N4N1G4NS!
GC: TH3R3S 4 WHOL3 MYST3RY 4FOOT H3R3 4ND W3R3 TH3 ONLY ON3S WHO C4N DO 4NYTH1NG 4BOUT 1T
GC: SO L3TS G3T CR4CK1NG!!
AA: w0w
AA: terezi i have t0 say
AA: its kind 0f weird h0w enthusiastic y0u are ab0ut this
GC: 3R
GC: 1S 1T
AA: kind 0f
AA: ribbit
GC: W3LL 1TS K1ND OF 4 B1G D34L!
GC: TH3 F4T3 OF 4N 3NT1R3 T1M3L1N3 4ND 4LL TH4T
GC: 4ND YOU 4ND 1 4R3 TH3 ONLY ON3S WHO S33M TO C4R3 4BOUT 1T
GC: B3C4US3 W3R3 TH3 ONLY ON3S W1TH OUR PR1OR1T13S STR41GHT >:/
AA: ha
AA: yeah kind 0f
AA: every0ne else is all caught up in this shipping n0nsense
GC: UM
AA: 0h
AA: i guess y0u g0t caught up in it t00
GC: JUST 4 L1TTL3
AA: s0rry
GC: 1TS F1N3
GC: THOUGH 1M 4 L1TTL3 L3SS 1NCL1N3D TO S4Y 1TS NONS3NS3
AA: i guess y0u w0uld be
AA: but i mean
AA: if y0u d0nt mind my saying
AA: eridan
AA: really
GC: H3H3H3H3
GC: 1TS F1N3, 1 G3T 1T
GC: BUT R34LLY, H3S 4 GR34T GUY
AA: thats the part im having tr0uble with
GC: >:P
AA: n0 i mean
AA: im sure its true n0w
AA: but the rttu paints a much uglier picture 0f him
GC: W3LL, 1 N3V3R S41D H3S *4LW4YS* B33N 4 GR34T GUY
GC: 1TS 4 V3RY R3C3NT TH1NG
GC: 4ND 1TS 4 V3RY COMPL1C4T3D S3R13S OF 3V3NTS TH4T L3D TO H1M B3COM1NG TH3 LOV4BL3 DOUCH3B4G W3 KNOW TOD4Y
AA: ha
AA: i guess s0
AA: still th0ugh
AA: it seems kind 0f weird
GC: WH4T S33MS K1ND OF W31RD
AA: well
AA: just the fact that y0u tw0 h00ked up s0 fast
AA: it just
AA: d0esnt seem like y0u i guess
GC: Y3S 1 KNOW
GC: YOUR3 NOT TH3 F1RST P3RSON TO PO1NT TH1S OUT BY 4NY M34NS
GC: BUT 1 M34N
GC: H3 M4D3 4 V3RY COMP3LL1NG C4S3
GC: 4ND 1 F1GUR3D H3 D3S3RV3D 4 F41R CH4NC3
AA: hm
AA: y0u think s0
GC: Y34H
GC: 1 TH1NK 4LL OF US DO, R34LLY
GC: 3V3N TH3 ON3S WHOV3 SQU4ND3R3D 4LL TH31R PR3V1OUS CH4NC3S
AA: ha
AA: like vriska
GC: H3H
GC: Y34H, M4YB3 3V3N H3R
AA: w0w
AA: i never expected t0 hear that fr0m y0u
GC: W3LL
GC: SH3S B33N ON GOOD B3H4V1OR L4T3LY
AA: i guess
AA: th0ugh there are still things i wish shed st0p d0ing
GC: L1K3 WH4T
AA: just
AA: digging up things best left buried
GC: OH
AA: nevermind
AA: n0 need t0 ruin a perfectly g00d c0nversati0n with uns0licited vriskachat
GC: H3H3H3
GC: 4N 3XC3LL3NT PO1NT, M1SS M3G1DO
GC: 4NYW4Y, 1 KNOW TH1S WHOL3 TH1NG W1TH 3R1D4N S33MS R34LLY F4ST
GC: BUT N3P3T4 W3NT TO 4LL TH1S 3FFORT S3TT1NG TH1NGS UP FOR MY S4K3
GC: SO 1 F1GUR3D 1 K1ND OF OW3D H3R
AA: really
AA: y0u did it f0r nepeta
GC: K1ND OF
AA: huh
AA: thats nice i guess
GC: W3LL
GC: SH3S B33N K1ND OF 4M4Z1NG L4T3LY
AA: really
AA: amazing is the w0rd y0u w0uld use t0 describe her
GC: K1ND OF Y34H
GC: 1 M34N
GC: TH1S WHOL3 SH1PP1NG TH1NG SOUND3D R34LLY STUP1D 4T F1RST
GC: BUT TH3 G1RL 1S 4 FUCK1NG M1R4CL3 WORK3R
GC: HON3STLY, 1TS JUST K1ND OF 4M4Z1NG HOW MUCH SH3S H3LP3D 3V3RYBODY SH3S SH1PP3D 4LR34DY
AA: huh
AA: it s0unds like y0u think pretty highly 0f her
GC: 4 L1TTL3
GC: 1T SOUNDS 4 L1TTL3 L1K3 YOU DONT
AA: n0t really
GC: H4S SH3 T4RG3T3D YOU FOR 4 SH1PP1NG SW33P Y3T?
AA: yes
AA: just a few minutes ag0 actually
GC: R34LLY?
GC: 4ND HOWD TH4T GO?
AA: i bl0cked her
GC: >:/
GC: NOW WHY WOULD YOU DO TH4T?
AA: because its p0intless
AA: shes n0t g0ing t0 be able t0 ship me n0 matter h0w hard she tries
AA: s0 why b0ther
GC: SO W41T
GC: 4R3 YOU NOT 1NT3R3ST3D 1N ROM4NC3 4T 4LL?
AA: its n0t s0 much that im n0t interested
AA: its m0re that im n0t capable
GC: WH4T
GC: 4R4D14, 4R3 YOU HON3STLY TRY1NG TO S4Y YOUR3 1NC4P4BL3 OF ROM4NC3
AA: n0t exactly
AA: m0re like the 0pp0site really
GC: UM
GC: 1 DONT UND3RST4ND
AA: i d0nt see why any0ne w0uld want t0 be in a quadrant with me
AA: s0 why even b0ther l00king
GC: WH4T!!!
GC: 4R4D14 TH4T 1S R1D1CULOUS
GC: WHY WOULD YOU TH1NK SOM3TH1NG L1K3 TH4T???
AA: l00k
AA: lets be h0nest terezi
AA: im n0t exactly the ideal r0mantic partner
AA: f0r fucks sake im n0t even a tr0ll anym0re
AA: im a gh0st fr0g sprite thing trapped inside a r0b0t
AA: ribbit
AA: wh0 w0uld be interested in me like that
GC: W3LL
GC: WH4T 4BOUT 3QU1US?
GC: YOU GUYS 4R3 ST1LL M4T3SPR1TS OR SOM3TH1NG, R1GHT?
AA: n0
AA: we br0ke up
GC: WH4T!!!
GC: WH3N D1D TH1S H4PP3N
AA: a while ag0
AA: apparently i scare him 0r s0mething
GC: TH4T
GC: TH4T SON OF 4 B1TCH!!!
AA: 0_0
GC: WH4T R1GHT DO3S H3 H4V3 TO JUST BR34K UP W1TH YOU L1K3 TH4T???
GC: H3 C4NT JUST STUFF YOU 1NTO 4 ROBOT 4ND TH3N BR34K TH1NGS OFF TH3 1NST4NT H3 LOS3S 1NT3R3ST 1N YOU!!!
GC: 1 KN3W H3 W4S 4 FUCK1NG CR33P, BUT 1 C4NT B3L13V3 H3 WOULD STOOP TH4T LOW!!
AA: terezi calm d0wn
AA: it wasnt like that
AA: h0nestly i never really l0ved him
AA: when he t0ld me he wanted t0 end things i was m0re relieved than anything
GC: OH
GC: SORRY, 1 K1ND OF LOST MY COOL TH3R3
AA: its 0k
AA: th0ugh i d0nt see why y0ud get s0 w0rked up ab0ut it
GC: B3C4US3 1TS K1ND OF 4 B1G D34L!
GC: YOU GUYS H4D 4 TH1NG
GC: 4ND 1F YOU W3R3NT H4PPY TOG3TH3R TH3N 1 GU3SS 1TS FOR TH3 B3ST TH4T YOU BROK3 UP
GC: BUT 1T ST1LL K1ND OF SUCKS >:[
AA: h0w d0es it suck
GC: B3C4US3 YOU D3S3RV3 TO B3 H4PPY 4R4D14!
GC: YOU D3S3RV3 4 M4T3SPR1T 4ND 4 MO1R41L JUST 4S MUCH 4S 3V3RYBODY 3LS3
GC: 1F NOT MOR3 SO, 3V3N!
AA: n0b0dy deserves anything
AA: least 0f all me
GC: 4ND JUST WH4T 1S TH4T SUPPOS3D TO M34N??
AA: l00k terezi
AA: i appreciate what y0ure trying t0 d0 here
AA: but h0nestly its n0t w0rth the eff0rt
AA: im just n0t cut 0ut f0r the wh0le r0mance thing
AA: in the alpha timeline i was d00med t0 be stuck with equius
AA: but i guess in this 0ne ill just be pr0perly al0ne
AA: im pretty much unl0vable 0n the wh0le
AA: and im 0k with it
GC: 4R4D14 TH4T 1S STUP1D!!!!
GC: YOU 4R3 NOT UNLOV4BL3!!!!!
GC: TH3R3 4R3 PL3NTY OF P3OPL3 WHO C4R3 4BOUT YOU 4ND PROB4BLY 4 F3W WHO 3V3N LOV3 YOU!!!
AA: like wh0
AA: name 0ne
GC: W3LL
GC: L1K3
GC: 1 M34N
AA: terezi
AA: its fine really
AA: im 0k with being al0ne
AA: i came t0 terms with it a l0ng time ag0
GC: NO TH4TS STUP1D
GC: YOU C4NT T3LL M3 YOUR3 0K W1TH TH4T
GC: 1 M34N
GC: TH3R3 4R3 ST1LL P3OPL3 YOU C4R3 4BOUT, R1GHT?
AA: i guess
AA: but what d0es it matter
GC: 1T M4TT3RS 4 LOT!
GC: YOU SHOULDNT JUST CUT YOURS3LF OFF FROM 3V3RYON3 YOU C4R3 4BOUT JUST B3C4US3 YOUR3 4 ROBOT OR WH4T3V3R
AA: then what sh0uld i d0
GC: W3LL
GC: 1S TH3R3 4NYON3 YOU F33L TH4T W4Y 4BOUT?
AA: y0u mean
AA: r0mantically
GC: Y34H!
GC: L1K3, 1 GU3SS YOU D1DNT LOV3 3QU1US
GC: BUT 1S TH3R3 4NYON3 3LS3 YOUR3 FLUSH3D FOR?
AA: i
AA: i d0nt kn0w
GC: WH4T 4BOUT SOLLUX?
GC: 1 KNOW YOU GUYS US3D TO H4V3 4 TH1NG
AA: terezi i d0nt want t0 talk ab0ut this
GC: 1 KNOW H3 H4S H1S TH1NG W1TH F3F3R1
GC: BUT H3S B33N 4CT1NG R34LLY W31RD 4BOUT TH4T
AA: terezi
GC: M4YB3 H3S NOT H4PPY W1TH H3R
GC: M4YB3 H3 ST1LL H4S F33L1NGS FOR YOU!
GC: YOU SHOULD T4LK TO H1M OR SOM3TH1NG
AA: terezi w0uld y0u just st0p!
AA: i said i d0nt want t0 talk ab0ut it and im n0t g0ing t0!
AA: s0 please just st0p
GC: 1
GC: FUCK
GC: SORRY
AA: n0 i
AA: im s0rry
AA: its just
AA: ribbit
AA: can we please just talk ab0ut s0mething else
GC: OK4Y
GC: WH4T 4BOUT 4LL TH1S T1M3 STUFF
GC: W3 N3V3R GOT TO TH4T
AA: 0k
AA: ive been investigating the 0ther branches a little m0re
AA: trying t0 find a pattern
GC: W3LL
GC: 4R3 TH3R3 4NY?
AA: kind 0f
AA: first 0f all i sh0uld tell y0u s0mething thats pr0bably imp0rtant
AA: i tracked d0wn when the timeline became d00med
AA: it was ab0ut tw0 weeks ag0
AA: but thats n0t where the branches start
GC: R34LLY?
GC: SO WH3R3 DO TH3Y ST4RT?
AA: its n0t until later
AA: seven days ag0 fr0m 0ur perspective
AA: n0ne 0f the branches bef0re then are being preserved
GC: HMMM
GC: SO SOMETH1NG H4PP3N3D 4 W33K 4GO TH4T TR1GG3R3D 1T
AA: right
AA: but i d0nt kn0w what
GC: W3LL, L3TS F1GUR3 1T OUT! >:]
AA: ha
AA: 0k
GC: OK4Y, L3TS ST4RT W1TH TH3 DOOM3D BR4NCH3S
GC: WH4TS C4US1NG TH3M TO F4LL OFF?
AA: im n0t certain
AA: in a l0t 0f them 0ne 0f us dies
AA: that makes sense i guess
AA: whatever the entity wants it needs all 0f us alive t0 d0 it
GC: DO3S TH4T 1NCLUD3 YOU?
AA: what
GC: DO YOU H4V3 TO B3
GC: UH, 1 GU3SS 4L1V3 1SNT R34LLY TH3 4PPROPR14T3 T3RM
GC: 1NT4CT, M4YB3?
AA: uh yes i have t0 be there
AA: i havent seen any where i expl0de 0r anything
AA: 0r at least n0t bef0re the branch st0ps being pr0tected
AA: but ive seen s0me where i find 0ut its d00med and jump t0 the alpha timeline t0 help fight the black king
AA: and th0se all fall 0ff
GC: INT3R3ST1NG
AA: kind 0f i guess
GC: BUT TH4TS NOT 1T, 1S 1T?
AA: n0
AA: there are 0ther d00med branches where every0ne is present and acc0unted f0r
AA: but they still fall 0ff
GC: 4ND WH4T DO THOS3 H4V3 1N COMMON?
AA: im n0t sure
AA: i never l00ked t00 deeply int0 any 0f the failed branches
AA: m0stly i g0t a general sense 0f the situation fr0m skimming the l0cal mem0s
AA: i have a big archive 0f them saved gr0uped by branch
GC: HM
GC: W3LL, WH4T 4BOUT TH3 SURV1V1NG BR4NCH3S?
GC: WH4T DO TH3Y H4V3 1N COMMON?
AA: its hard t0 say
AA: like i said i 0nly really g0t a curs0ry glance at them
AA: but
AA: well there is 0ne thing
AA: but it seems kind 0f silly
GC: NO CLU3 1S 3V3R TOO S1LLY, M1SS M3G1DO
GC: WH4T 1S 1T?
AA: well
AA: in the surviving branches
AA: there seem t0 be a l0t 0f
AA: r0mantic situati0ns
AA: like m0re than usual
AA: pe0ple getting int0 quadrants and stuff
GC: R34LLY?
AA: yeah
AA: its kind 0f weird
AA: like y0u and eridan isnt even the weirdest ive seen
AA: i think there was even 0ne where i became flushed f0r y0u s0meh0w
GC: >:O
GC: S3R1OUSLY????
AA: yeah i kn0w
AA: um
AA: n0thing came 0f it in case y0ure w0ndering
AA: s0 d0nt take that as a pr0p0siti0n 0r anything
GC: DONT WORRY 1 WONT
GC: BUT
GC: M4N TH4T 1S W31RD
GC: W3LL
GC: 1 GU3SS 1TS NOT TH4T W31RD
AA: h0w is it n0t that weird
GC: 3R
GC: 1 DONT KNOW, N3V3RM1ND
AA: 0k
AA: ribbit
GC: W41T
GC: YOU S41D TH3 BR4NCH3S ST4RT FROM ON3 W33K 4GO, R1GHT?
AA: yes
GC: 1 TH1NK
GC: N3P3T4 POST3D H3R F1RST SH1PP1NG M3MO 4 W33K 4GO
AA: what
AA: h0ld 0n
AA: thats right she did
AA: h0w c0uld i have missed this
GC: YOU D1DNT POST ON 1T, FOR ON3 >:P
AA: w0w
AA: i never c0nsidered that nepeta might be behind all this
AA: but l00king at it n0w it makes perfect sense
GC: 1T DO3S?
AA: 0f c0urse it d0es
AA: shes been acting a l0t different than she usually d0es
AA: y0ull ackn0wledge that right
GC: Y34H 1 GU3SS
AA: that c0uldve been caused by s0mething
AA: she might be under the influence 0f the h0rr0rterr0rs
AA: 0r maybe she struck a deal with the denizens
AA: she might even be c0lluding with even m0re sinister f0rces
GC: R34LLY?
GC: N3P3T4?
AA: terezi
AA: if theres 0ne thing ive learned fr0m traveling the timestream
AA: its that y0u never really kn0w what any0ne is capable 0f
GC: 1 GU3SS
GC: BUT ST1LL
GC: YOU R34LLY TH1NK SH3S UP TO NO GOOD?
GC: SH3 S33MS MOR3 1NT3R3ST3D 1N SH1PP1NG TH4N 4NYTH1NG
AA: the shipping is pr0bably just a diversi0n
AA: a way 0f abusing her newf0und p0wers to fulfill her every petty whim
AA: her true purp0ses are und0ubtely m0re sinister
GC: 1 DONT KNOW
GC: TH4T SOUNDS 4 L1TTL3 SUSP3CT
AA: l00k i cant stick ar0und and chat
AA: i have t0 c0nfr0nt her 0n this
GC: UM
GC: 4R3 YOU SUR3 TH4TS 4 GOOD 1D34?
AA: i d0nt kn0w
AA: but if shes the 0ne behind all this
AA: then i have t0 kn0w what shes up t0
GC: W3LL
GC: OK4Y
AA: but thanks f0r all y0ur help in this terezi
AA: i d0nt think i c0uld have figured it 0ut with0ut y0u
GC: H3Y, NO PROBL3M
GC: 1F YOU 3V3R N33D H3LP W1TH 4NYTH1NG, YOU C4N COM3 TO M3
AA: yeah thanks
GC: NO R34LLY 4R4D14, 1 M34N 1T
GC: 1F YOU 3V3R N33D 4NYTH1NG
GC: 1LL B3 H3R3 FOR YOU
AA: um
AA: 0f c0urse
AA: thanks terezi
GC: DONT M3NT1ON 1T >:]
AA: anyway
AA: i sh0uld g0 i guess
GC: OK4Y
GC: GOOD LUCK W1TH N3P3T4
AA: thanks
AA: 0k
AA: bye
GC: BY3 4R4D14
apocalypseArisen [AA] ceased trolling gallowsCalibrator [GC].
GC: D4MN 1T, PYROP3
GC: WHY DONT YOU JUST T3LL H3R?
GC: UGH
gallowsCalibrator [GC] ceased trolling apocalypseArisen [AA].
***
arsenicCatnip [AC] began trolling twinArmageddons [TA].
AC: :33 < okay i know youre not even going to humor me on the roleplaying thing
AC: :33 < so lets just get this ofur with
TA: oh god.
TA: ii2 thii2 one of your fabled 2hiippiing 2weep2?
AC: :33 < thats right!
AC: :33 < so lets get cracking!
TA: actually, before we 2tart, ii need two a2k you 2omethiing.
AC: :33 < okay fine, what?
TA: why are you 2endiing porn two ff?
AC: :33 < what?
TA: wiith her iin iit?
TA: and vk al2o iin iit?
TA: and them doiing freaky thiing2 wiith each other'2 blood?
AC: :33 < mister catpurr i have no idea what youre talking about
AC: :33 < i nefur sent any porn to fefurry!
TA: oh yeah?
TA: then how do you explaiin thii2?
-- twinArmageddons [TA] sent arsenicCatnip [AC] the file "maiden voyage (vs/fp) [tw: dubcon, bloodplay] (1).doc" --
AC: :33 < oh what the hell!
AC: :33 < so what, did you find this snooping around on her computer or something??
TA: no, ii got iit from ky, who got iit from vk, who got iit from ff.
AC: :33 < oh god damn it, i told her not to send it to anypawdy else!!
AC: :33 < now thats thr33 other people who know about my rpf!!! >:((
TA: ii already knew about iit.
TA: but 2eriiou2ly, why the fuck would you 2end her thii2?
AC: :33 < none of your business!
AC: :33 < why does it even bother you so much?
AC: :33 < what fiction fefurry catpuns to be purrusing in her spare time isnt really any of your b33swax!!!
TA: yeah, ii know that.
TA: and ii wouldn't have a problem wiith iit at all iif iit diidn't 2tar my lea2t favoriite 2piiderbiitch iin paradox 2pace.
AC: :33 < oh whatefur
AC: :33 < that is not even a real purroblem
AC: :33 < i figured you of all people would be thrilled to s33 a piece of fiction about two lovely ladies getting furiendly with each other!
TA: vk ii2n't a lovely lady, 2he'2 a fuckiing mon2ter.
AC: :33 < okay sollux i get it
AC: :33 < you have a massive blackcrush on her, you dont have to tell me twice
TA: oh for fuck'2 2ake, really?
TA: you're hoppiing on thii2 iidiiotiic bandwagon too?
TA: plea2e tell me you aren't goiing two try two 2hiip u2.
AC: :33 < oh please
AC: :33 < like i would efur help out eridan like that!
AC: :33 < its just so painfully pawbvious that youre black fur her that its honestly kind of insulting!
TA: how many tiime2 do ii have two 2ay thii2?
TA: ii don't hate her liike that.
TA: ii never have, and ii never wiill.
AC: :33 < oh really?
AC: :33 < youve nefur hated her like that?
TA: not a day iin my fuckiing liife.
AC: :33 < then how do you explain THIS, mister catpurr???
-- arsenicCatnip [AC] sent twinArmageddons [TA] the file "mind your own beeswax (sc/vs) [tw: blackrom, dubcon, bloodplay, p3].doc" --
TA: oh wow, more of your horriible real liife fanfiictiion.
TA: thii2 prove2 what, exactly?
AC: :33 < i only wrote that beclaws somepawdy requested it!
AC: :33 < and just who do you think that was, mister catpurr?
TA: ii don't know, vk?
TA: aa, maybe?
AC: :33 < it was a 222-sw33p-old cerulean blooded admiral commanding a battle fl33t 865 light years from alternia!
TA: eheh, wow.
TA: ii gue22 ii had 2ome fan2 off-world.
AC: :33 < oh honestly sollux, im not stupid
AC: :33 < do you really think im going to believe somepawdy like that would even know the two of you existed?
AC: :33 < i know you just used your expurrt hacking skills to request that fic anonymously using her as a purroxy!
TA: okay, fiine, you caught me.
TA: ju2t a fun fact, ii'm pretty 2ure that lady got culled for that.
TA: iit cau2ed quiite a 2candal, iif ii recall.
TA: an admiiral wiith 2uch an exemplary 2erviice record breakiing protocol two attempt two contact the homeworld.
TA: and all two reque2t 2ome pedophiiliiac 2mut.
TA: eheheh, ju2t thiinkiing about how hard 2he got owned make2 me laugh.
AC: :33 < oh wow, you must be so purroud of yourself sollux
AC: :33 < getting an innocent purrson killed beclaws you stole her identity to request erotic fiction
TA: are you kiiddiing me?
TA: 2he'2 blueblood top bra22, there'2 no way 2he's "iinnocent."
AC: :33 < ugh, whatefur
AC: :33 < but youll admit you were interested in her!
TA: look, ii reque2ted thii2 2tory liike a 2weep ago.
TA: back then, vk wa2 ju2t one of aa'2 flarpiing riivals, ii barely even knew her.
TA: all ii knew about her wa2 that 2he wa2 kiind of a biitch...
TA: and that 2he wa2 IINCREDIIBLY hot.
AC: :33 < h33 h33!
AC: :33 < well, its not like thats changed!
TA: what, her beiing hot, or her beiing a biitch?
AC: :33 < why cant it be both?
TA: eheh, niice.
AC: :33 < s33, youre still attracted to her!
TA: no ii'm not.
TA: 2he kiind of blew her chance wiith the whole ruiiniing my liife thiing.
AC: :33 < yes yes i know!!
TA: and ju2t for the record, thii2 2tory 2uck2.
AC: :33 < ill admit its not my best work
AC: :33 < but writing psionic pawer play is hard!
AC: :33 < especially when you dont have any psionic pawers yourself
TA: yeah, you pretty much ju2t completely blew iit on that.
TA: hone2tly, you ju2t kiind of 2uck at wriitiing blackrom.
TA: none of the kiink 2tuff iin thii2 fiic ii2 even remotely workable.
TA: except the blood 2tuff, that'2 ju2t really 2trangely hot.
AC: :33 < well yeah
AC: :33 < the blood stuff is kind of my thing!
TA: eheh, riight.
AC: :33 < anyway i didnt have any expurrience with blackrom when i wrote that
AC: :33 < n33dless to say thats changed now >:33
TA: ugh.
TA: iif you knew iit wa2 needle22 two 2ay, then why diid you 2ay iit?
AC: :33 < beclaws you missed your chance, sollux!
AC: :33 < eridan is a great hissmesis
AC: :33 < if by great you mean stupid
AC: :33 < and by hissmesis you mean cr33py idiot
TA: eheheh, whatever.
TA: ii'm glad you're happy wiith hiim, or angry, or whatever.
TA: but ii am 2traiight up not iintere2ted.
AC: :33 < right, of course
AC: :33 < youd be much better with vwiskers anyway!
TA: ugh, fuck off.
AC: :33 < no!
AC: :33 < ive still got a shipping sw33p to do!
TA: yeah, thank2, but no thank2.
TA: ii don't really need any 2hiippiing help.
TA: 2o you can ju2t leave now.
AC: :33 < what!!!
AC: :33 < of course you n33d my help sollux
TA: no ii don't.
TA: ii've got my whole 2hiipping 2iituatiion under control.
AC: :33 < oh really?
AC: :33 < so youve just got efurrything figured out?
TA: yep, iit'2 pretty much an open and 2hut ca2e.
AC: :33 < okay fine
AC: :33 < if youre so certain of your shipping situation
AC: :33 < then just whats the deal with you and fefurry?
TA: 2he'2 goiing two be my mate2priit.
AC: :33 < oh yeah?
AC: :33 < are you sure shes okay with that?
TA: ii talked two her, and 2he 2aid 2he'd be fiine wiith it.
TA: 2o what'2 the ii22ue?
AC: :33 < well if fefurrys going to be your matespurrit
AC: :33 < then just whos going to be your meowrail?
TA: tz, ii gue22?
TA: 2he'd probably be cool wiith that, riight?
AC: :33 < seriously sollux?
AC: :33 < you dont even know if terezi wants to be your meowrail and youre planning on it anyway?
TA: look, we've alway2 had kiind of a pale thiing anyway.
TA: ii don't 2ee any rea2on why 2he'd be oppo2ed two iit.
AC: :33 < well
AC: :33 < yeah, she purrobably wouldnt be
TA: yeah, exactly.
TA: 2o can ii go now?
AC: :33 < oh yeah, absolutely!
AC: :33 < efurrything s33ms to check out!
TA: well great.
AC: :33 < oh
AC: :33 < but just one last thing
TA: what ii2 iit?
AC: :33 < i n33d you to make things official furst!
TA: what.
AC: :33 < go tell fefurry you want to be matespurrits!
AC: :33 < and terezi you want to be meowrails!
AC: :33 < dont worry, ill wait
TA: no, fuck that.
TA: why 2hould ii have two do anythiing riight now?
AC: :33 < beclaws i dont think i can trust you sollux!
AC: :33 < how do i know youre serious about this?
AC: :33 < furankly i think youre just making this up to get me to leave you alone!
TA: oh, don't get me wrong, ii do want you two leave me alone.
TA: but ii'm not makiing thii2 up.
AC: :33 < well then tell them!
TA: no, ii don't have two do jack 2hiit ju2t yet.
TA: but ii've made my decii2iion, alriight?
TA: 2o you can ju2t take me off your liittle 2hiippiing wall, becau2e ii've got iit fiigured out.
AC: :33 < wow, arent you just the man with the master plan!
TA: yeah, that'2 riight, ii'm the fuckiing 2hiippiing ma2ter.
TA: get the a2p2 on the phone, becau2e ii'm your new po2tma2ter fuckiing general.
AC: :33 < well maybe your plan isnt as foolpurroof as you think!
TA: oh yeah?
TA: okay, tell me, how ii2 iit not foolproof?
AC: :33 < well, youre just assuming terezi wants to be your meowrail!
TA: 2o what, 2he doe2n't?
AC: :33 < okay she kind of does
AC: :33 < but maybe youre not at the top of her list!
AC: :33 < maybe theres somepawdy else shes a lot paler fur!
TA: liike who?
AC: :33 < hey lets play a game!
AC: :33 < its called "whos business is that???"
AC: :33 < you get thr33 guesses, but only the furst one matters
TA: ugh.
TA: 2o ju2t what are you 2ugge2tiing here, np?
AC: :33 < well
AC: :33 < just bear with me here fur a second
AC: :33 < but what if fefurry was your meowrail?
TA: what.
TA: why the fuck would we want two be moiiraiil2?
AC: :33 < its not as bad as it sounds!!!
TA: ii never 2aiid iit 2ounded bad.
TA: but why the fuck would ii want two wa2te an awe2ome giirl liike ff on my pale quadrant?
AC: :33 < well, look
AC: :33 < have you s33n her paleflirting with anypawdy else?
TA: um...
TA: no, ii gue22 not.
AC: :33 < beclaws it certainly s33ms like shes been doing plenty of the other kinds of flirting!!
TA: yeah, liike wiith your fuckiing moiiraiil.
TA: can you tell hiim two fuck off, by the way?
AC: :33 < h33 h33, nope!
AC: :33 < if you really want equius to leave her alone, then youll just have to make her your matespurrit!
TA: ugh.
TA: ii WANT two make her my mate2priit.
TA: but ii don't ju2t want two ru2h iintwo thii2 2hiit liike a crazed earmammoth.
TA: ii2 that really 2o unrea2onable?
AC: :33 < um, kind of yes???
AC: :33 < if you really are flushed fur her, then i dont s33 why you should f33l the n33d to wait
TA: becau2e iit'2 kiind of a biig deal.
AC: :33 < i nefur said it wasnt!
AC: :33 < i just dont get why youre f33ling so much trepidation about this
TA: trepiidatiion?
TA: and ju2t where the fuck diid you learn that word?
AC: :33 < h33 h33, i heard it furom kanaya
TA: whatever.
TA: look, ii don't want two ru2h thii2 becau2e ii'm pretty much the unluckiie2t ba2tard iin exii2tence.
TA: and ii'm afraiid iif ii try two make thiing2 offiiciial wiith ff now, then thii2 2hiity game ii2 goiing two go out of iit2 way two do 2omethiing two hurt her.
AC: :33 < hrm
TA: 2o can you ju2t tell your 2weaty palebro two back the fuck off?
TA: iit'2 bad enough that vk'2 hiittiing on her two.
AC: :33 < what???
AC: :33 < sollux that is so dumb
AC: :33 < vwiskers is not hitting on fefurry, why would you even think that
TA: ii'm not 2ayiing 2he's 2eriiou2 about iit.
TA: 2he'2 ju2t doiing iit two fuck wiith me.
AC: :33 < really?
AC: :33 < beclaws it s33ms to me like if vwiskers really is hitting on fefurry, then fefurrys hitting on her just as much back!
TA: ugh, no, ii'm not gettiing iintwo thii2 agaiin.
TA: e2peciially not wiith you of all people.
AC: :33 < fine, whatefur
TA: anyway, we're mii22iing an iimportant poiint here.
TA: iif ff become2 my moiiraiil, then ju2t who the fuck ii2 goiing two be my mate2priit?
AC: :33 < i dont know, you tell me!
TA: what, are you flu2hed for me?
TA: becau2e 2orry, ii don't liike you liike that.
AC: :33 < ugh, of course im not flushed fur you!! XPP
TA: 2o who then, kk?
TA: that'2 a po22iibiiliity, ii gue22?
TA: but ii don't really 2ee iit workiing out.
AC: :33 < no im not shipping you with karkat!
TA: well, that doe2n't really leave me wiith any other optiion2.
TA: unle22 you're tryiing two paiir me off wiith eq.
TA: iin whiich ca2e, you can ju2t plaiin fuck off.
AC: :33 < wow
AC: :33 < youre seriously not even going to mention her?
TA: what?
AC: :33 < i mean aradia you jackass!!!
TA: oh my fuckiing god.
TA: no, ii do not want two talk about thii2 wiith you.
AC: :33 < well you have to talk to somepawdy about it!
AC: :33 < youre pawbviously not going to talk to her!
TA: why would ii talk to her about iit?
TA: 2he's obviiou2ly not iintere2ted iin me anymore.
TA: 2he'd much rather 2pend all of her tiime 2moochiing your piiece of 2hiit moiiraiil.
AC: :33 < oh really?
TA: yeah, they're mate2priit2 or 2omethiing, aren't they?
AC: :33 < as a matter of fact, they arent!
AC: :33 < they broke up a while ago
TA: what?
TA: 2eriiou2ly?
AC: :33 < yep!
AC: :33 < but i guess you nefur thought to ask, did you???
TA: waiit, why the hell diid they break up?
AC: :33 < beclaws they werent happy together!
AC: :33 < aradia nefur really loved him, and i knew it
AC: :33 < and when equius figured that out, he realized theyd nefur work out as matespurrits
AC: :33 < so he asked her if they should break up, and she agr33d that they should!
TA: oh.
TA: well 2hiit.
TA: that 2uck2 for aa, ii gue22.
AC: :33 < why does that suck fur her?
AC: :33 < she wasnt happy with him!
AC: :33 < she shouldnt have to be stuck in a relationship with somepawdy she doesnt love!
AC: :33 < and fur that matter equius shouldnt have to be stuck in a relationship with somepawdy that doesnt love him!
AC: :33 < that s33ms reasonable enough, doesnt it?
TA: fuck, yeah, ii gue22.
TA: but 2tiill, iit kiind of 2uck2 for her.
AC: :33 < why do you k33p saying that??
AC: :33 < i just said it didnt!
TA: look, even iif 2he wa2n't flu2hed for hiim, ii ju2t kiind of fiigured...
TA: ii fiigured iif 2he 2pent enough tiime wiith hiim, 2he miight become flu2hed for hiim.
AC: :33 < ugh no thats not how it works
AC: :33 < thats not even love, its more like stockholm syndrome!
AC: :33 < your matespurrit should be somepawdy you love right furom the start, not somepawdy you just have to settle fur!
TA: okay, fiine, whatever.
TA: but iif eq ii2n't goiing two be her mate2priit, then who wiill be?
AC: :33 < sollux why are you suddenly so concerned with aradias quadrants??
TA: um, becau2e 2he'2 kiind of my friiend, and ii want her two be happy?
TA: hone2tly, what the fuck are you even iimplyiing here, np?
AC: :33 < look, i know you two used to have a thing
AC: :33 < but what was it?
AC: :33 < were you flushed fur her or pale fur her or what?
TA: and ju2t how the fuck ii2 thii2 any of your bu2iine22?
AC: :33 < beclaws it matters sollux!
TA: no iit doe2n't!
TA: none of thii2 even make2 a fuckiing diifference.
TA: what doe2 iit matter iif ii wa2 flu2hed for her or pale for her iin the pa2t?
TA: now iit'2 the pre2ent, and a2 iit ii2, 2he ha2n't 2poken two me ever 2iince your 2weaty a22hole bff shoved her iintwo a tiin can.
AC: :33 < that doesnt mean anything!
AC: :33 < she hasnt talked to anypawdy!
AC: :33 < well, except terezi i guess
TA: what?
TA: 2he'2 been talkiing two tz?
AC: :33 < ugh, thats not any of your business!!!
AC: :33 < look, i know this sounds crazy
AC: :33 < but what if you were matespurrits with aradia and meowrails with fefurry?
TA: are you kiiddiing me? ii couldn't do that.
TA: iit'd be liike ii wa2 throwiing ff under the communal tran2portatiion 2cuttlewagon.
AC: :33 < no it wouldnt!
AC: :33 < i know fur a fact that fefurry would be purrfectly fine with being your meowrail!
AC: :33 < she told me herself!
TA: 2he'2 ju2t 2ayiing that.
TA: why the fuck would 2he want two be my moiiraiil?
TA: do you hone2tly thiink 2he want2 to look after me liike a fuckiing grub2iitter?
TA: 2top me from 2tiickiing my fiinger2 iin power outlet2 or 2omethiing?
AC: :33 < ugh sollux that is so stupid!!!
AC: :33 < meowrallegiance isnt just about watching after your meowrail and stopping them from hurting themselves!
AC: :33 < its about trust and honesty!
AC: :33 < its somepawdy that you can talk to about literally anything and theyll tell you what to do about it!
AC: :33 < and its about always wanting to help your meowrail and doing efurrything you can to make them impurrove
AC: :33 < and its about being willing to do it even if they resist beclaws you know its fur their own good!
AC: :33 < its an amazing special thing and i know it and you know it and fefurry knows it and youd be so lucky to have her as a meowrail!!!
TA: whatever, ii'm 2tiill not buyiing iit.
AC: :33 < well if youre not going to be her meowrail, then who will be?
AC: :33 < beclaws i can tell you terezis not interested!
TA: what doe2 that matter?
TA: ii already told you, ii want two be tz's moiiraiil.
AC: :33 < so who then?
AC: :33 < you really think she wants to be kanayas meowrail??
TA: eheh, no, 2he obviiou2ly ha2 another quadrant iin miind for her.
AC: :33 < h33 h33, i know, its so cute!
AC: :33 < but anyway, that doesnt leave her with many choices!
AC: :33 < its just what, karkat and aradia?
TA: well fuck, ii don't know.
AC: :33 < look sollux will you just admit it?
AC: :33 < youre her best candidate for a meowrail and we all know it!
TA: yeah, well, maybe ii'm not pale for her!
AC: :33 < then what are you fur her??
TA: ii'm flu2hed for her, obviiou2ly!
AC: :33 < then why dont you just become her matespurrit???
TA: becau2e iit'2 not that 2iimple!
TA: ii can't ju2t ru2h iintwo thii2, okay?
TA: how many tiime2 do ii have two 2ay thii2??
AC: :33 < sollux theres something youre not telling me here
AC: :33 < you k33p saying you dont want to rush into a matespurritship but you wont tell me why!
TA: ii diid tell you, becau2e iit'2 kiind of a biig fuckiing deal.
AC: :33 < yes yes i know its a big deal!
AC: :33 < but maybe fefurry is a big deal!
AC: :33 < and no that isnt a fat joke
TA: ii wa2n't goiing two 2ay anythiing.
AC: :33 < ugh whatever im getting off topic
AC: :33 < look, fefurry is a really nice sw33t amazing girl and she doesnt deserve to be played with like this!
TA: ii'm not playiing wiith her!
TA: 2he under2tands perfectly what'2 goiing on, and 2he'2 fiine wiith it.
TA: 2o why can't you ju2t hop the fuck off my bulge about iit???
AC: :33 < look, you cant just k33p her in the dark about this!
AC: :33 < if you really are flushed fur her, then you should tell her!
AC: :33 < whats so hard about that??
TA: iit'2 compliicated.
AC: :33 < so what is it?
AC: :33 < is there somepawdy else??
AC: :33 < are you not flushed fur her after all???
TA: oh, for fuck'2 2ake, no!
TA: there ii2n't anybody el2e, ju2t fuck off.
AC: :33 < is this about aradia, is that it?
TA: oh my god, no.
TA: 2eriiou2ly, what the fuck are you even iimplyiing here?
AC: :33 < its obvious that you still care about her sollux!
AC: :33 < i can s33 it just from the way youre always yelling at vriska!
AC: :33 < so dont even act like she doesnt mean anything to you anymore!
TA: ii never fuckiing 2aiid that!
TA: of cour2e ii 2tiill care about her!
AC: :33 < then what is it?
AC: :33 < how do you really f33l about her?
TA: iit doe2n't fuckiing matter what ii feel about her!
AC: :33 < then can you at least tell me how you felt about her before?
TA: okay, fiine!
TA: ii wa2 flu2hed for her, alriight?
TA: iit'2 not liike it fuckiing matter2 anymore!
TA: even iif 2he ii2 done wiith eq, iit'2 not liike 2he'd ever want two talk two me agaiin!
AC: :33 < oh my god
AC: :33 < i just figured it all out
AC: :33 < get the legislacerators on the long distance fiber optic telecommunicative device, because ive solved the case!
TA: what the fuck are you talkiing about?
AC: :33 < youre not flushed for feferi
AC: :33 < because youre still flushed for aradia!
AC: :33 < and the whole reason you k33p saying you n33d more time with feferi is because you think if you spend enough time with her youll get over aradia and actually become flushed for her!
TA: WHAT???
AC: :33 < i cant believe it, vriska was right!
AC: :33 < youre honestly trying to write aradia out of your life!!
TA: fuck you!
TA: you don't know a fuckiing thiing about me and aa, 2o maybe you 2hould just 2hut the fuck up!
AC: :33 < i know youre doing the same thing to feferi that you were doing to aradia before!
AC: :33 < and i know they both deserve better than that!!
AC: :33 < feferi deserves to know the truth about how you actually f33l about her!
AC: :33 < and aradia deserves to stay in your life!
AC: :33 < because she probably still cares about you, and you shouldnt just try to ignore her!!
AC: :33 < you think your whole plan will work out for the best, but all youre doing is hurting both of them, and its just wrong!!!
TA: no, you know what, fuck you!
TA: ii'm fuckiing done talkiing two you about thii2!
TA: you don't know 2hiit about me or ff or aa or anybody, alriight?
TA: you thiink you're helpiing u2, but all you're doiing ii2 ju2t fuckiing everythiing up!
AC: :33 < no im not!!!!
AC: :33 < i know what im doing is a good thing, and so do you!!!!
AC: :33 < and if you really care about feferi or aradia then youll let me help you!!!!
TA: II DON'T WANT YOUR FUCKIING HELP!
TA: all ii want ii2 for you two 2tay the fuck out of my liife!
TA: 2o ju2t leave me alone and leave ff alone and never talk two eiither of u2 ever agaiin!
AC: :33 < you cant just ignore your problems forever sollux!!!
AC: :33 < youre going to have to face them eventually!!!
TA: ju2t fuck off!!!
twinArmageddons [TA] blocked arsenicCatnip [AC].
AC: :33 < rrrgh
AC: :33 < well fuck
AC: :33 < now what??
apocalypseArisen [AA] began trolling arsenicCatnip [AC].
AA: 0k nepeta
AA: i think its ab0ut time y0u tell me whats really g0ing 0n here
AC: :33 < what??
AC: :33 < aradia what are you talking about
AA: d0nt play dumb with me
AA: i kn0w y0ure behind all 0f this
AC: :33 < all of what??
AA: the wh0le situati0n with this timeline
AA: were supp0sed t0 be d00med
AA: but this timeline isnt acting the way a d00med timeline sh0uld
AA: and i kn0w y0u have s0mething t0 d0 with it
AC: :33 < aradia i have no idea what youre talking about!
AA: 0h c0me 0n
AA: nepeta im n0t stupid
AA: y0uve been behaving c0mpletely differently since a week ag0
AA: which is incidentally the exact m0ment when this timeline starts branching
AA: s0 just tell me whats g0ing 0n
AC: :33 < okay fine
AC: :33 < i have something to do with the timeline not being doomed
AC: :33 < but i cant tell you any more than that!
AA: why n0t
AC: :33 < beclaws i just cant!
AA: just tell me wh0 y0ure w0rking f0r
AA: is it the h0rr0rterr0rs
AA: 0r the denizens maybe
AA: 0r maybe
AA: y0u arent w0rking f0r him are y0u
AC: :33 < look im sorry but i cant tell you anything about it!
AA: can y0u at least tell me why y0u cant tell me ab0ut it
AC: :33 < um
AC: :33 < maybe?
AA: just tell me
AC: :33 < okay okay
AC: :33 < im on a task right now
AC: :33 < and if i tell you anything about it ill automatically fail it
AA: a task
AA: 0f c0urse its a denizen
AA: i sh0uldve kn0wn
AA: s0 what d0es psyche want y0u t0 d0
AA: is she trying t0 escape the sessi0n s0mehow
AA: 0r d0es she want t0 scratch it
AA: whatever it is it d0esnt really matter
AA: were all d00med n0 matter what artifice she may be pl0tting
AC: :33 < its not anything like that!!
AC: :33 < anyway as much as i wish i could tell you i cant
AA: alright fine
AA: ill just g0 ask y0u in a d00med branch
AC: :33 < what??
AA: hang 0n
AA: 0_0
AA: wh
AA: what
AA: nepeta y0u cann0t be fucking seri0us
AC: :33 < what?
AA: i
AA: i just
AA: shipping
AA: seri0usly
AA: the shipping thing is y0ur task
AC: :33 < er
AC: :33 < maybe??
AA: i just
AA: i cann0t
AA: ribbit
AA: i cann0t believe h0w fucking stupid that is!!!
AC: :33 < um
AA: why the fuck w0uld she assign y0u a task like that
AA: nepeta was this y0ur idea
AA: did y0u h0nestly strike a deal with her just s0 y0u c0uld p0intlessly ship all 0f us in this d00med timeline
AC: :33 < no its not anything like that!!!
AC: :33 < it was psyches idea, honestly!
AA: why
AA: why the fuck w0uld she d0 that
AA: it d0esnt make any sense
AC: :33 < look i dont really know either!
AC: :33 < all i know is she said she could purrserve our timeline as long as i followed the rules
AC: :33 < and once i succ33ded in shipping efurryone shed be able to purrmanently save our timeline from being doomed
AA: well she lied t0 y0u
AA: theres n0 way t0 und00m a timeline
AA: she can h0ld the pr0cesses back but eventually this timeline is g0ing t0 draw the attenti0n 0f higher p0wers
AA: and theyll deal with it manually
AC: :33 < how do you know she was lying?
AC: :33 < how do you know there isnt a way to undoom a timeline??
AA: because ive seen a billi0n different d00med timelines
AA: and n0t 0ne 0f them has f0und a way
AC: :33 < well maybe thats beclaws they nefur had a chance!
AC: :33 < they were all busy dying horribly
AA: um
AA: thats a p0ssibility i guess
AA: but n0 it d0esnt make any sense
AA: d00m isnt just an 0n 0ff switch theres m0re t0 it than that
AC: :33 < like what?
AA: the reas0n a timeline bec0mes d00med in the first place is because it diverges fr0m the events that cause its 0wn existence
AA: the events that led t0 the creati0n 0f 0ur 0wn universe are s0 tightly scripted that even the slightest divergence will result in the entire sequence being disrupted
AA: s0 any deviati0n fr0m the alpha timeline is incapable 0f persisting because it st0ps itself fr0m ever being created
AC: :33 < ugh who cares about the stupid alpha timeline!!
AC: :33 < whats so great about it anyway??
AA: its the way things have t0 g0
AA: thats all there is t0 it
AC: :33 < well, why do we have to follow the alpha timeline?
AC: :33 < why cant we be a
AC: :33 < a beta timeline or something??
AA: thats n0t h0w it w0rks
AA: h0nestly just the term beta timeline is really insulting 0n s0 many levels i d0nt kn0w where t0 begin
AC: :33 < what??
AC: :33 < how is it insulting?
AA: d0 y0u think i havent tried nepeta
AA: d0 y0u h0nestly think i havent tried t0 change the way things g0
AA: d0 y0u really think i want t0 be fucking dead
AA: ive tried t0 fix things
AA: but i cant
AA: n0ne 0f us can
AC: :33 < i dont believe that!
AC: :33 < i think psyche is giving us a way to change things for the better!
AA: there isnt a way
AA: even the p0wer 0f all twelve denizens c0mbined isnt en0ugh t0 reverse the effects 0f d00m 0n a timeline
AA: im s0rry t0 say this wh0le quest 0f y0urs has been a c0mplete waste 0f time
AA: really its kind 0f inspiring h0w y0u keep finding new and exciting ways t0 waste an infinite res0urce
AA: i guess amazing was the right w0rd t0 describe y0u
AC: :33 < what??
AA: nevermind
AA: this is p0intless
AA: i sh0uldnt even be here anym0re
AA: id be better 0ff just jumping t0 the alpha timeline
AC: :33 < what!!!!
AC: :33 < aradia no you cant leave!!!
AA: why n0t
AA: whats the p0int 0f me staying
AA: its just an0ther d00med timeline
AA: t0 think f0r the briefest 0f m0ments i actually let myself get my h0pes up
AA: when i knew the wh0le thing was just a big sham the entire time
AC: :33 < its not a sham!!!
AC: :33 < look, why do you want to go back to the alpha timeline???
AA: because staying here is p0intless
AA: the alpha timeline needs me m0re than this 0ne d0es
AC: :33 < ugh thats not true!!!
AC: :33 < this timeline n33ds you more than anything!!!
AC: :33 < why do you even care about the stupid alpha timeline anyway???
AA: because its the 0nly 0ne that matters
AA: the 0nly reas0n f0r a d00med timeline t0 persist as l0ng as it d0es is if it c0ntributes t0 the alpha in s0me way
AC: :33 < ugh that is so stupid
AC: :33 < the alpha timeline is dumb and youre dumb fur even wanting to purrserve it in the furst place!
AA: 0_0
AA: nepeta that is seri0usly the m0st idi0tic thing ive ever heard
AC: :33 < why do you n33d to help the alpha timeline anyway??
AC: :33 < just whats so fucking great about it????
AA: i never said there was anything great ab0ut it
AA: but its the 0nly 0ne that matters
AC: :33 < i dont care!!
AC: :33 < furom what ive heard, the alpha timeline is actually purretty fucking terrible!!!
AC: :33 < just a horrible endless purrade of suffuring fur all purrties involved!
AC: :33 < is a timeline like that really worth purrserving???
AA: it d0esnt matter
AC: :33 < look, just be honest with me
AC: :33 < what happens to me in the alpha timeline?
AA: um
AC: :33 < its something horrible isnt it???
AA: well
AC: :33 < i knew it!!!
AC: :33 < so i dont care!!!
AC: :33 < even if it is hopeless, id rather fight fur a chance at making a better timeline than surrender to the stupid alpha!
AA: l00k nepeta i appreciate the sentiment and all but theres really n0thing y0u can d0 ab0ut it
AA: this iterati0n 0f this universe is d00med and thats that
AC: :33 < well maybe it is
AC: :33 < but what if we make another universe??
AC: :33 < a better universe than whatefur stupid one we create in the alpha timeline???
AA: we cant create a universe
AA: universes cant be created in d00med timelines
AA: n0 matter h0w well we breed 0ur universe fr0g the final d00r will lead t0 n0thing but an empty v0id
AA: its a security precauti0n
AA: an sgrub sessi0n is a fairly lightweight thing but a universe is several 0rders 0f magnitude larger
AA: n0 use wasting all that matter and energy by letting any 0ld d00med timeline create a universe that will just be d00med anyway
AC: :33 < seriously?
AC: :33 < we really cant create a new universe?
AA: n0pe
AA: s0 theres really n0 reas0n f0r y0u t0 b0ther with this at all
AA: the wh0le thing was just 0ne big ruse
AA: a distracti0n fr0m infinitely m0re imp0rtant duties
AA: 0h well it was enj0yable reprieve fr0m fatalism while it lasted
AA: id alm0st managed t0 sav0r it
AC: :33 < i dont get it aradia
AC: :33 < why are you so certain that were beyond saving?
AA: because 0f all the myriad ways ive seen 0f affecting a timeline i havent seen 0ne that can save it fr0m the inevitable destructi0n that entails fr0m departing fr0m the alpha timeline
AA: and even if i was wr0ng and psyche did have s0me way 0f d0ing it it d0esnt matter
AA: because her task was imp0ssible fr0m the 0utset
AC: :33 < what?
AC: :33 < aradia what are you talking about?
AA: y0ur little shipping quest
AA: it cant be d0ne
AA: and even if y0u werent d0ing it f0r such a p0intless reas0n the wh0le thing w0uld still be an exercise in futility
AC: :33 < thats not true!
AC: :33 < its not impawssible, i know it can be done!
AA: its 0bvi0us whats g0ing 0n here nepeta
AA: y0ur denizen set y0u 0n an imp0ssible task and 0ffered y0u a reward she c0uldnt p0ssibly deliver 0n
AA: all f0r s0me devi0us purp0se 0f her 0wn n0 d0ubt
AA: psyche played y0u f0r an utter f00l
AC: :33 < no, thats not true!
AC: :33 < i trust psyche!
AC: :33 < she gave me all the tools i n33ded to complete my task, and i know i can do it!
AC: :33 < and she purromised she could save us all, and i believe her!
AA: ugh
AA: really
AC: :33 < yes really!
AA: y0ure abs0lutely dead set 0n this wh0le thing arent y0u
AC: :33 < yes i am!!!
AC: :33 < it isnt impawssible to ship all of us, i just know it!
AA: is there n0thing i can d0 t0 change y0ur mind
AC: :33 < no!!!!
AA: well in that case theres n0 p0int in sticking ar0und
AA: i may as well just depart f0r the alpha n0w
AC: :33 < aradia wait just a minute!!!!!
AA: why
AC: :33 < just listen to me!
AC: :33 < now i may not know as much about time as you do
AC: :33 < but i know one thing
AC: :33 < the alpha timeline doesnt n33d your help!
AC: :33 < it already exists, and theres nothing anypawdy can do to change that!
AC: :33 < and if i say something to you to make you change your mind, therell still be a branch where you decide to leave anyway
AC: :33 < so the alpha timeline wont even lose an aradia if you stay!
AC: :33 < so theres no reason for you to leave!!!
AA: that
AA: ribbit
AA: thats true
AA: but theres n0 reas0n f0r me t0 stay either
AC: :33 < thats a lie!!!
AC: :33 < there are plenty of reasons fur you to stay!!
AC: :33 < in fact, there are exactly eleven reasons fur you to stay!
AC: :33 < now if you stay, i cant guarant33 that efurrything will work out
AC: :33 < but if you leave, then well definitely be doomed!
AC: :33 < and then all the rest of us will die!!
AC: :33 < and you can try to say that we were doomed anyway, and it doesnt matter
AC: :33 < but youll know fur a fact that the reason we all died is beclaws you left!!!
AC: :33 < and can you really live with that?
AC: :33 < can you live with the fact that youll be directly responsible for all of our deaths?
AA: i
AA: 0f c0urse i can
AA: the alpha timeline is m0re imp0rtant
AC: :33 < okay fine, i believe you
AC: :33 < so just go ahead, aradia
AC: :33 < all the rest of us are going to die horribly
AC: :33 < but its okay!
AC: :33 < i wont blame you
AC: :33 < none of us will
AC: :33 < me and terezi and sollux are all going to be purrfectly fine with the fact that we died beclaws of you
AC: :33 < the alpha timeline is more impurrtant after all!
AC: :33 < so just go ahead and leave
AA: nepeta
AA: that is a really fucking dirty argument and y0u kn0w it
AC: :33 < h33 h33, sorry
AC: :33 < but i n33d you to stay, aradia!
AC: :33 < i cant do this without you
AA: y0u cant d0 it with me either
AA: it cant be d0ne peri0d
AA: even if i d0nt leave were all d00med anyway because the task set bef0re y0u is an utterly fruitless 0ne
AC: :33 < why do you k33p saying that???
AC: :33 < just what is it about my shipping quest thats so completely impossible???
AC: :33 < im already halfway done, why should finishing the other half be any harder??
AA: because as admirable as y0ur pr0gress has been thus far theres 0ne thing y0u never th0ught t0 take int0 c0nsiderati0n
AA: 0ne 0bstacle thats insurm0untable even f0r the greatest of shippers
AA: a single tr0ll am0ng the twelve 0f us that is c0mpletely and utterly unshippable
AC: :33 < okay just furom all your doom and gloom talk i assume youre talking about yourself
AA: c0ngratulati0ns thats the first reas0nable assumpti0n y0uve made in this entire c0nversati0n
AC: :33 < aradia that is stupid!
AC: :33 < why would you think youre unshippable???
AC: :33 < and dont even try to say its beclaws youre an emotionless robot or anything stupid like that!
AC: :33 < under all that meowtallic plating youre still a purrson with f33lings and we both know it!
AC: :33 < or did you just beat the crap out of my meowrail and then make out with him beclaws you were purrogrammed to???
AA: ugh
AA: thats exactly what im talking ab0ut
AA: there was 0ne pers0n in the entirety 0f parad0x space wh0 was willing t0 be in a quadrant with me
AA: and even he backed 0ut
AC: :33 < ugh that doesnt mean anything!
AC: :33 < look, were you efur actually flushed fur equius?
AA: n0t really n0
AC: :33 < well, thats why he ended your relationship!!!
AC: :33 < he really was flushed fur you, aradia
AC: :33 < in fact, he might still be!
AC: :33 < but when he realized you didnt love him back, he decided it was fur the best to end things
AC: :33 < beclaws he wants you to be happy!
AC: :33 < but when you were with him you were just miserable!
AC: :33 < and he left beclaws you deserve to be happy, even if its with somepawdy else!
AA: i d0nt deserve anything
AC: :33 < yes you do!!!
AA: n0ne 0f us deserve anything nepeta
AA: n0ne 0f us are entitled t0 happiness
AA: all we can d0 is take what we can get and try t0 be 0k with it
AC: :33 < thats not true!!!
AC: :33 < efurryone deserves to be happy!
AC: :33 < and you shouldnt f33l like you have to settle fur being in a quadrant with someone you dont love beclaws you think you cant do any better!
AA: s0 then what
AA: just what are y0u suggesting i d0
AC: :33 < im suggesting you should be with somepawdy you actually love!
AA: like wh0
AC: :33 < i dont know, you tell me!
AC: :33 < come on, aradia, surely theres somepawdy you care about like that!
AA: it d0esnt matter
AC: :33 < yes it does!!!!!
AA: n0 it d0esnt!
AA: n0t anym0re
AA: i had my chance and i blew it
AA: and if i try again all im g0ing t0 d0 is just screw everything up
AC: :33 < you arent going to screw anything up aradia!
AA: nepeta just st0p
AA: i get what y0ure trying t0 d0 but it isnt g0ing t0 w0rk
AA: and y0u think y0ure helping but all y0ure d0ing is letting pe0ple get hurt
AC: :33 < well sometimes you have to hurt people to help them!
AA: well maybe s0me pe0ple d0nt deserve t0 be hurt!
AA: maybe theyve suffered en0ugh bad luck already and they d0nt deserve t0 be subjected t0 any m0re in a misguided attempt t0 help them!
AA: maybe they just deserve t0 be happy
AA: even if its with s0me0ne else
AC: :33 < but nopawdy deserves anything, aradia
AC: :33 < you said it yourself, remempurr??
AA: shut up
AC: :33 < aradia listen to me
AC: :33 < sometimes
AC: :33 < sometimes people are stupid
AC: :33 < sometimes people convince themselves that they cant efur have what they want even if they know it isnt true
AC: :33 < and so they find something else
AC: :33 < even if its not what they actually want
AC: :33 < and they cling to the hope that maybe one day they actually will
AC: :33 < and sometimes that works!
AC: :33 < but sometimes its just unhealthy
AC: :33 < and even though it might s33m harsh
AC: :33 < sometimes the best thing to do is to destroy their hopes entirely
AA: well
AA: maybe s0me pe0ple deserve t0 h0pe
AC: :33 < well why do they deserve to hope and you dont???
AA: i
AA: ribbit
AA: i d0nt kn0w
AC: :33 < aradia
AC: :33 < you arent going to screw anything up
AC: :33 < and even if you are, maybe things n33d to be screwed up!
AC: :33 < maybe this whole situation is screwed up already and screwing it up even more is the only way to fix it!
AA: n0
AA: nepeta just st0p
AA: st0p st0p st0p st0p st0p st0p
AA: i d0nt want t0 hear this anym0re
AC: :33 < why not???
AA: because im starting t0 believe it
AA: and im n0t letting myself get my h0pes up again
AC: :33 < well you should get your hopes up aradia!
AC: :33 < beclaws you deserve to be happy as much as efurrypawdy else does!
AA: well what if my happiness is mutually exclusive with every0ne elses happiness
AA: what then
AC: :33 < what are you talking about??
AA: y0u kn0w what i mean
AA: hes already happy with her
AA: what right d0 i have t0 interfere
AC: :33 < well what if he isnt happy with her???
AA: what
AC: :33 < does he s33m happy to you aradia???
AA: i
AA: n0
AA: im n0t listening t0 this anym0re
AA: im d0ne even hum0ring this
AA: just leave me al0ne and leave them al0ne
AA: and st0p trying t0 help pe0ple when all y0ure g0ing t0 d0 is screw things up f0r them
AC: :33 < im not screwing anything up!!!!
AC: :33 < you and sollux deserve to be together and you both know it!!!!
AA: just st0p
AA: and d0nt try t0 c0ntact me again
AC: :33 < aradia!!!!
apocalypseArisen [AA] blocked arsenicCatnip [AC].
AA: i
AA: i sh0uldnt
AA: but
apocalypseArisen [AA] began trolling cuttlefishCuller [CC]
AA: hey
CC: O)(, Aradia, )(ey!
CC: W)(at's going on?
AA: is he happy with y0u
CC: W)(at?
CC: You mean Sollux?
AA: yes
CC: Um... yea)(, I GU-ESS so!
CC: W)(y do you ask?
AA: just curi0us
CC: Aradia, is t)(ere somet)(ing you want to talk to me aboat?
CC: Because if t)(ere is, by all means, we can talk!
AA: n0
AA: i just wanted t0 kn0w if he was happy
AA: thats all that matters
CC: W)(ale...
CC: If you SAY so, I guess.
AA: l00k just
AA: f0rget i asked
CC: 38?
AA: i sh0uld g0
apocalypseArisen [AA] ceased trolling cuttlefishCuller [CC].
CC: Aradia???
CC: )(mmm...
CC: Is )(e )(appy wit)( me?
CC: Kind of a STRANG-E question.
CC: But...
CC: W)(ale, maybe it's not.
CC: Ug)(, w)(at am I even DOING, talking to mys)(ellf???
cuttlefishCuller [CC] ceased trolling apocalypseArisen [AA]