"Diane! The Inspector wants to see you in his office" Sargent Hick's voice drew DC Diane Radland's attention from her monitor. Glancing at her watch, she got to her feet, walked to the office at the far end of the room and knocked on the door.
"Enter" Jacob Bonnie's voice came through the door, and Diane pushed the door open "DC Radland - please, have a seat"
"Thank you, sir" She sat down, folding her hands on her lap. Jacob looked at the report on his desk, then handed it to her.
"There's been a break in at the Happy Hands Adoption Agency, and I'd like you to go down to the scene and help with the investigation" He said "Two servers have been stolen, and the Agency would like them back" He paused "However there is something you should be aware of before you down to the offices"
"There is some confusion about how the crime was committed" Jacob gestured to the report "There's no indication of where the thieves got in, or how they bypassed the motion detectors and so forth"
"None at all?" She stared at him in surprise.
"None" He paused "Which is why they have called in another department to help with the investigation"
"Another department?" She asked, worry furrowing her brow "Is this going to end up in a turf war with a bunch of pinheads?" He laughed.
"No - they are not like the guys from the XLG" He grinned "The people from S.O. 642 are very professional" She smiled, then blinked a few times.
Harry Potter, MIB
Episode 1x01 : Pilot
"Good morning, and welcome to Happy Hands Adoption Agency" The receptionist beamed at her "How may I help you this morning?"
"DC Radland with Covenstone CID" Diane replied, flashing her warrant card "Would it be possible to speak with someone about the burglary?"
"Of course" The receptionist replied with a smile "Mr Smith is in his office - third on the left"
"Thank you" Diane slipped her warrant card back in to her pocket, then looked back at the receptionist "Has anyone else arrived?"
"I am expecting some people from another agency and I was wondering if they'd arrived?" The receptionist shook her head.
"Not as far as I know" She paused "Would you like me to let you know when they do?"
"If it's not a problem"
"Not at all" The receptionist grinned "Third on the left"
"Thank you" Diane grinned, then turned and walked down the corridor towards Mr Smith's office.
The receptionist looked up from her desk as a black sedan pulled up outside the Agency building. A moment later, four people, in very well tailored suits, got out and looked around.
"Odd looking family" She thought "Unless it's two families?" She looked at the way the they were interacting, then shook her head almost at once "Not a family" She watched as they walked up to the door, then her eyes widened slightly as she realised they each had a bulge in their suit jackets.
"Oh my" She lowered her hand to rest on the building intercom, then smiled as the four newcomers walked through the door.
"Good morning, and welcome to Happy Hands Adoption Agency" She beamed, looking the four of them up and down "How may I help you?" The younger of the two men pulled a badge from his back pocket, and handed it to her.
"My name is Special Agent Potter, and these are my colleagues Special Agents Lovegood, Weasley and Bones" Harry smiled at her. She looked down at the badge in her hand, then up at the four Agents in front of her.
"I've never heard of S.O. 642" She said, smiling politely.
"We're pretty new" Harry admitted "We work with the police force on the more unusual cases - the ones that seem very hard to solve"
"Oh" The receptionist blinked a few times "Well - there is a detective from Covenstone meeting with Mr Smith at the moment. Would you like me to see if they are available?"
"No - that's okay" Harry held his hand up, then turned to the other three "Bill, Sue - can you find the server room and see what you can get about how the machines were taken?"
"Yes, boss" The two Agents nodded, and walked off down the corridor. Harry rolled his eyes then turned to the second young woman.
"Lu - you're with me"
"Yes, boss" Luna nodded.
"What did I tell you about calling me boss?" He asked, pretending to pout. Luna paused, frowning. Then she grinned.
"That it if we called you sir one more time, you would give us to Tracey and Oliver as test subjects?" She asked, still grinning. Harry smirked.
"Oh yeah - I did say that" He paused, then shrugged "Okay - boss it is" He turned back to the receptionist "You mentioned a Mr Smith?"
"The servers don't have any personal information on them" Steve Smith said "With all the recent problems, we've split the data in to two sets" He paused "There's also something else that is a little strange?"
"Which is what?" Diane asked, then turned as their was a knock on the door.
"Come in" Smith called out. The door opened to reveal to people in dark, black suits "May I help you?"
"My name is Agent Lovegood" The young woman said, walking in to the office "This is my boss Agent Potter" She handed her badge to Smith, then glanced at Diane "Covenstone CID?"
"DC Radland" Diane nodded, looking the two people up and down. They were both well dressed, but she noticed the gun-shaped bulges under their jackets "We were just discussing the server theft"
"I understand that there are no signs of a break-in" Harry said as he and Luna sat down either side of Diane "Are you sure it's not an inside job?"
"I trust all my staff" Smith replied "And there is the matter of the motion detectors and security tapes"
"Have you talked to your IT guy?" Diane asked, making Luna smile "If it was someone on the inside, then they could have disabled the security systems" Smith looked thoughtful, then shook his head.
"I've worked with Anton for fifteen years - he is beyond reproach"
"Would it be possible to speak with him?" Luna asked, then held up her hand before Smith could reply "If he is a suspect, we would need to talk to him anyway, and if he isn't, he might be able to tell us more about the security system and how it could be bypassed" Smith nodded in understanding.
"I'll ask him to meet us in the server room" He said, standing up, then paused "That is if you don't have any more questions?"
"I believe DC Radland was asking what type of data was on the servers when we interrupted" Harry glanced at Diane "Detective?"
"Yes" Diane nodded, frowning slightly "Mr Smith was explaining that the data is split up in to two segments" She turned back to Smith, who sat down again.
"We are only involved in the placement of children with families, so we have no details where the children come from" He explained "The information that was taken was in regard to the children when they come in"
"And no one could learn anything from it?" Luna asked "They couldn't use it to track down the children?"
"No" Smith shook his head "The only thing it shows is when the children were born, and when they were brought in to the Agency. We don't even keep records of the birth parents" He paused "However, as I was explaining to DC Radland when you came in, there is something slightly odd about the two servers that were taken"
"Who are you?" Susan and Bill looked round as a young man in jeans and a t-shirt walked up to them. Bill smiled, then pulled out his badge.
"Special Agents Weasley and Bones" He said "We were just investigating how someone could have stolen the servers with out actually coming in to this room" He paused "Who are you?"
"Anton Harris" The man replied "I'm in charge of IT" He paused "What did you find out?"
"That whoever took the servers did it without leaving any finger prints, or even disturbing the mounts they were housed in" Susan replied "And they also didn't leave any footprints or marks of any type anywhere in the room" She paused "Which is fairly impressive" Anton looked at them curiously.
"Would you be able to tell us what was on the servers?" Bill asked, interrupting him.
"The two servers in question kept the records of all the children brought in to the Agency for adoption" Anton replied.
"Both of them?" Susan turned to face him, looking curious.
"Yes" Anton nodded "Which, now you come to mention it, does seem a little strange"
"Do you have any other copies of the data?" Susan asked.
"No" He shook his head "They were two parts of the same mirror"
"No backup tapes?" Bill looked over at the rack in the corner. Anton followed his gaze, then walked over to the rack and started looking through them. A few moments later, he pulled one out and took it over to the computer in the corner.
"Give me a moment to look throu...." He started, then trailed off "Well - that's a little odd"
"What is?" All three of them turned as Harry, Luna, Diane and Mr Smith walked in to the server room. Anton gestured at the screen.
"The backup tape from two nights ago is blank" Anton replied, staring at the screen. He pulled out the tape, and put another one in. A few seconds later he shook his head "Same from four nights ago" He span his chair round until he was facing them "It'll take me about half an hour to check them all, but my guess is that they'll all be wiped"
"They were after the data" Luna said, glancing at Harry, who nodded in agreement.
"Okay then" Harry looked around "Mr Smith - if we could take a copy of the security tapes, we'll examine them to see if you've missed anything" He turned to Diane "Thank you for your assistance DC Radland, but we'll take over the case from here"
"Wait a moment....." Diane turned to face him, but he held up his hand.
"Yes sir?" Harry smiled.
"Sorry - I didn't introduce myself. I'm Special Agent Potter, and this is Special Agent Lovegood and DC Radland from Covenstone CID" Luna nodded while Diane glared at Harry "And don't call me sir - I was never a teacher" Anton looked at him curiously, while Luna, Bill and Susan smiled.
"Sorry, Agent Potter - what can I do to help?"
"How far do the backup tapes go back?"
"Four months" Anton replied "One for each day, plus one for each month"
"If Mr Smith doesn't mind, could you check out each one? If the blanking only goes back so far, then it might give us an idea what data they were after"
"Okay" Anton nodded. Harry grinned, then turned back to the rest of his team.
"Bill, Sue - finish up here, and we'll see you back at the Bureau"
"Luna, with me"
"Yes, boss" Harry nodded to the others, then turned and walked out of the server room.
"Hey - wait up!" Diane stormed out of the Agency office as Harry and Luna walked over to their sedan. They both came to a halt, and turned to face her.
"Yes, DC Radland?" Luna smiled politely.
"What makes you think you can just walk in to my crime scene and take my case?" Diane yelled "What gives you the right to do this? Who the hell are you?" Harry stared at her for a moment, then slipped his hand in to his jacket, and pulled out a piece of paper.
"Read that" He smiled "It will explain everything" Diane took the piece of paper and looked down at it. She glanced through the first few paragraphs.
"This doesn't...." She looked up, then trailed off as she realised she was alone in the car park.
"Sir? Do you have a moment?" Jacob turned from the water-cooler as Diane walked up behind him.
"Of course" He smiled "How'd it go at Happy Hands?" Diane rolled her eyes "That well, huh?"
"Who the hell are they?" She asked "They just waltzed in to the crime scene and took charge, then pretty much kicked me out without a by-your-leave" Jacob smiled.
"642 a top secret agency that do things a little differently" He replied, picking up the cup and taking a drink "Their charter grants them a fairly wide latitude to pursue their cases as they see fit"
"So that's it? There's nothing I can do about this?" She shook her head "That just doesn't seem right"
"Well" He looked at her thoughtfully "Perhaps if you went to talk to them in their own offices, they might be willing to include you"
"Sir? You think I should go, cap in hand, and beg them to let me play with them?" She stared at him in disbelief. He smiled back at her.
"You are interested in this case, yes?" He asked. She nodded "And you have to admit, the Agents from 642 have got your interest?" She nodded again "And will you be able to just let it go?"
"No, sir, I won't" She shook her head in annoyance.
"Very well - do you have any cases outstanding?"
"No, sir - I was helping Beth and Liz with the Dreyfuss case, and was waiting reassignment" Jacob looked at her thoughtfully, then smiled.
"You've got until the end of next week" He said "If you haven't got yourself involved by then, I'm going to have to find you something else to do" Diane looked at him curiously, then nodded.
"Thank you sir" She paused "Sir?"
"I don't suppose you might know where they might be based?"
Twenty minutes later she drove in to an empty car park and brought the car to a halt.
She looked around, then stared in surprise at the far end of the lot.
"A portacabin?" She looked at the large blue container crate in disbelief "This is the head quarters of a top secret government agency?" She got out of her car and walked towards it, then stopped. She frowned, and took a few steps back.
"Well..... okay" She blinked a few times, trying to understand what she was seeing.
"Kind of screws with your brain, doesn't it?" She looked over her shoulder to see Agent Lovegood stood behind her, a slightly amused smile on her face.
"How....." Diane turned back, gesturing at the portacabin "It's...." She trailed off "What am I missing?"
"It's a long story" Luna grinned "And I will be happy to explain if you'll answer me one question"
"It's an interrogative statement used to determine knowledge" Luna replied in a dead pan tone. Diane stared back at her, looking even more confused "But that's probably not what you wanted to know, is it?"
"Not really, no" Diane shook her head.
"What do you see?" Luna pointed down to the end of the car park "When you are stood here, and when you take three steps forward?"
"When I'm stood here, I see a large, blue, metal crate that looks like it should contain slightly less large wooden crates" Diane took three steps forward "And here it looks like a blue police box" She turned back to Luna "In fact, if I didn't know better, I'd say it looks exactly like The TARDIS from Logopolis?"
"Good eye" Luna grinned "The majority of people think it's from the latest series"
"No St John Ambulance logo on the door" Diane said blankly, then, with another glance at the far end, she continued "So why is there a TARDIS at the end of the car park? Also - how go you get a large blue crate to turn in to a TARDIS?"
"Do you really want to know?" Luna stared at her intently. Diane stared back, then nodded "Okay then" Luna started walking towards the crate. A few moments later, she stopped and looked back "Coming?"
"Bigger on the inside"
"She just accepts it"
Luna stopped at the door to The TARDIS, then looked back at Diane.
"Ready?" Diane glanced at the door, then back at Luna.
"Okay" Luna smirked, then clicked her fingers. The door swung open, and Diane peered inside "What do you think?" Diane looked in to the open doorway, then turned back to Luna.
"It's bigger on the inside?"
"Yes - it's bigger on the inside" Luna grinned "Still want to know more?" Diane stared in to the open doorway, then nodded "That's the spirit!" She took Diane's hand, and pulled her in to the office beyond the door "Welcome to S.O. 642, also known as The Muggle Investigation Bureau" She waved her hand to the left "Over there is OpTech, and on the right we have Medical and The MLA"
"Muggle Liaison Agent" Luna beamed "You already know Harry, William and Susan, and the other team is made up of Pansy, Fleur, Hannah and Neville who, along with Hermione and Terry, you'll meet later, because right now, there is someone else you should meet" They came to a halt in front of a door with the plaque "DOIC" on it. Luna knocked twice, then turned to Diane.
"Just be yourself, be honest and ask any question you can think of" She paused "Except DOIC's first name - you really don't want to ask that, because trust me, it won't end well"
"Come in" A voice came from the other side of the door.
"Okay - have fun" Luna patted her on the shoulder, then turned and skipped away. Diane stared after her for a moment, then turned and opened the door.
Luna walked over to her desk, and sat down.
"Do you think she's the one?" Hermione asked from her right. Luna turned, and realised the other members of her team were also waiting for her answer.
"Who had bigger on the inside?" She asked, then laughed as Bill grinned at her "I'll pay you tomorrow"
"Much appreciated" Bill grinned.
"And to answer the question at hand, I think so, yes" Luna nodded "She's able to see the entrance, which is a big point in her favour, and she didn't run away screaming when she looked inside" Luna paused "And according to her Inspector, she is quite intent on looking in to this" She leaned back in her chair "She also properly identified the model of our front door, which is fairly impressive in and of itself"
"But...." Susan asked, but Luna shrugged.
"There isn't one" She said "Well - aside from the obvious"
"Yes, m'am" Diane nodded, sitting down opposite a young woman "From Covenstone CID"
"Don't call me m'am" The woman gave a brief smile "I'm either DOIC, Director Tonks or simply just Tonks" She paused "For the moment, I will accept Director"
"Yes, Director" Diane nodded.
"So, Detective Radland, why are you here?" Diane took a deep breath, then let it out slowly.
"I like puzzles" She said simply "I like thinking about them, working at them and solving them" Tonks nodded "My Inspector tells me it's what makes me such a good detective"
"So what puzzle is currently keeping you up nights?"
"Well - the fact this building appears to be bigger on the inside than the outside is somewhat interesting, and the way it changes from a TARDIS to a large, blue, metal crate depending how far away you are has got me a tad curious, but mostly it's the servers" Diane leaned forward, putting her hands on her knees "I have seen a lot of thefts in my time - both as Uniform and CID - and in all that time, I've never found one that I couldn't work out"
"You were on this case what? An hour?" Tonks grinned "Can you usually solve them that quickly?"
"No" Diane shook her head in amusement "But no fingerprints? Nothing on the security tapes?"
"You don't think it's an inside job?" Tonks asked curiously "It would explain the complete lack of evidence, after all"
"It's possible" Diane nodded thoughtfully "But Mr Smith seems to trust his staff, and I didn't get the idea that any of them were in on it" She leaned back in her chair "But if it's not an inside job, then I have no idea how they could have pulled it off" Tonks looked at her with a slight smile.
"Would you like to know how it was done?" She asked. Diane stared at her.
"You know?" She asked, her voice full of surprise "How?"
"How was it done, or how do I know?" Tonks asked, still smiling slightly.
"Either" Diane replied "Or both"
"Well - it's like this" Tonks slid her desk draw open and pulled out a long, thin stick of wood "They did it by magic. And the reason I know that is that I am a witch"
Bill dropped the report back on to his desk, then looked around at the other four.
"Do you know what I don't understand?" He said, leaning back in his chair.
"Based on your last performance review, I'd say nearly everything" Hermione replied with a grin. Bill rolled his eyes.
"I love you too, boss" He laughed "But what I don't get is why mages would go to all the trouble of stealing two servers from a muggle adoption agency"
"It is a tad odd" Hermione nodded, then grinned "You don't think it was Arthur, do you?" Bill shook his head, still smiling.
"My sire would never come this far in to the muggle world. Even assuming he would want to, The GAPO would never let him" He sighed "But I suppose it is always possible that someone could have taken them as a joke - a bit of muggle baiting"
"But what are the odds they would take those two servers?" Susan asked, then glanced at Luna, who was just about to reply "That was rhetorical"
"Drat" Luna snapped her fingers, making the team laugh.
"They were stored in the same rack, and on adjoining shelves" Harry said "Maybe whoever took them was aiming for one and took two instead"
"But...." Bill trailed off, waving his hand absently "It seems so.... pedestrian"
"True" Hermione nodded again "Unless they are familiar with the muggle world, they'd not know how annoying this would be"
"And they didn't stick around to watch" Luna pointed out "The usual muggle-baiters would stay to enjoy the results" She glanced at Susan "Anything?"
"No" Susan shook her head "The four of us were the only mages there, and the only other trace I picked up was off our friend in Nim's office"
"So they took something they wouldn't understand, and couldn't possibly use and didn't bother to hang around to see the chaos" Hermione frowned "So what are we missing?"
"A witch?" Diane looked Tonks up and down, then at the wand on the desk "Like Evil Edna? Or more like Glinda?" Tonks laughed.
"To be honest, a mix of both, with a bit of Tabitha thrown in" She said after a moment "You don't have a problem with this?"
"Right now? No" Diane replied "Tonight, when I'm thinking about the events of the day - almost certainly"
"Good answer" Tonks picked up her wand "No doubt OpTech and probably Minnie could give you a more detailed explanation, but basically we - witches and wizards - are born with the ability to manipulate energy in ways that other people can't" She pointed her wand at a bookshelf in the corner of the room, and it lifted off the floor "We can levitate things" She lowered the bookcase, then summoned one of the books "And summon them" She looked at Diane "With me so far?"
"Good" She waved her wand again, transforming the chair next to Diane in to a large hat-stand "We can also transfigure matter from one from to another, or make disappear completely" She flicked her wrist, and the chair vanished. Diane reached out and waved her hand where it had been.
"Where did it go?" She asked, looking back at Tonks.
"What makes you think it went somewhere?" The Director asked.
"Preservation of matter" Diane replied promptly "Nothing is ever created or destroy, merely modified from one form to another" She smiled "It's one of the basic laws of the universe, and while I can't be completely certain, I don't think that you have the power to change the basic laws of physics" Tonks laughed again.
"You are definitely going to get along with Minnie and the OpTech staff" She said, still smiling "And yes - when we vanish things, they go to a...." She paused, then shrugged "A magical holding place - I don't know the exact details. Even when we destroy stuff, we merely transport it to one of the many active volcanoes around the world so it gets vaporized"
"Okay" Diane nodded again.
"There are a lot of other spells - ones that can help you speak a foreign language, ones that can make you fly, ones that can cook and clean and wash and dry and so on" Tonks paused "And there are ones that are less nice"
"The Dark Side of The Force?" Tonks gave a short laugh.
"Like everything in life, magic is neither good nor bad, but can be used for both" She nodded "Which is where we - the agents of The Muggle Investigation Bureau - come in"
The next morning, Diane walked in to the CID office at Covenstone Police Station, and up to the Inspector's office. She knocked twice, then put her hands down by her sides.
"Come in" Jacob called out, and Diane pushed the door open and walked inside "Good morning, DC Radland"
"Good morning, sir" Diane walked up to the desk, then came to a halt, unconsciously standing at attention. Jacob looked at her poise, then smiled.
"Did you learn everything you needed to know, Diane?"
"Yes, sir, thank you" She nodded, then bit her lip "Sir...."
"Yes, Detective?" Diane took a deep breath.
"Yesterday afternoon, The Director of S.O. 642 offered me a job" Jacob resisted the urge to smile.
"It seems that one of their police liaison officers resigned a few weeks ago, and they have been looking for a replacement" Diane continued "Apparently they think I would be suitable...." She trailed off as Jacob smiled "And you know all about this, don't you sir?"
"Yes, Diane" He grinned "Sorry"
"You...." She paused "I forget - what's punishment for calling a superior officer names?"
"That depends on whether you are taking the job or not, and whether you do the name calling before or after you are transferred" He smiled "You are taking the position, I take it?"
"Only with your permission, Jacob" She said quietly "You put me up for my job here, and then you were willing to take me in to CID despite my lack of experience. I owe you everything, and I won't run out on you" He smiled back at her.
"You have my blessing, Diane" He replied "And while it might make you want to revert to calling me names again, there's something you should know" He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his desk "It seems that S.O. 642 have been watching you for a while. I was approached a week or so ago about them offering you a position"
"Really?" Diane lost her formal pose, and Jacob gestured for her to sit down.
"Would I lie to you?" He asked, then waved his hand "Don't answer that" She snorted in amusement "I know you enjoy your job here, and I didn't want to just transfer you without asking, so when the case at Happy Hands came up, I assigned you to it to see how you'd do, and if you'd be willing to find out more about them"
"Oh" She stared at him blankly "It was all a test?"
"More or less" He nodded apologetically "If you had let it go, or if you'd decided to stay here, that would have been the end of it" He shrugged "But since you want the job, I'd say it was worth the effort"
"And you don't mind me leaving?"
"As long as you come back to say hi every so often" He grinned "Seriously - if you want to take this job, take it" She gazed back at him, then grinned.
"Thank you, sir" She paused "For everything"
"You are most welcome" They stood up, and shook hands "When would they like you to start?"
"As soon as is possible" Diane replied "Do you want me to work my shift today?"
"No - that's okay. The paperwork for the transfer will be filed by the end of today, so you can officially start tomorrow" She grinned at him.
"Thank you again" She hesitated, then bounded round the desk and gave him a brief hug. After a moment, she straightened up and wiped her eyes "Well - so long"
"Take care" He smiled "And I mean it about keeping in touch - I want to hear all about your first week" He paused "I have a feeling it's going to be very interesting"
"Oh yes" She grinned.
Five minutes later, she walked out of the main doors Covenstone Police Station, and turned down the main road.
"Which is where we - the agents of The Muggle Investigation Bureau - come in"
"The Muggle Investigation Bureau?" Diane asked, and Tonks nodded.
"The full story is kind of long and complicated, but I can give you the cliff notes if you want?" Diane nodded "Okay then - if you are sitting comfortably, I'll begin"
"Along side your world - the muggle world - there is a world of witches and wizards. They have their own government and their own society, entirely separate and distinct from the non-magical world" Tonks paused "However, for all the differences between the two worlds, there are a few things they have in common - including the more darker and disturbing aspects of humanity"
"Such as?" Diane asked, and Tonks sighed.
"Discrimination, in one form or another" She said simply "The urge to look down and belittle people because you consider them inferior"
"Of a sort" Tonks nodded "But the most prevalent form of discrimination isn't about skin colour, or religion or sexuality - it's about blood purity" Diane raised her eyebrows in curiosity "There is a faction that believes the further back you can trace your magical ancestry, the more pure your blood is. And the more pure your blood is, the more people should respect you and the more superior you are" Diane nodded.
"It's all nonsense of course" Tonks continued "Agent Granger is one of the most powerful witches in a generation, and she is a first generation witch. Me? I am from one of the oldest families in the magical world, and I am about average" She shrugged "Anyway - about fifty years ago, a war erupted in the magical world over the topic of blood purity. A man named Tom Riddle decided that the pure-bloods - those who have a long magical lineage - should be in charge of the magical world, and everyone else should serve them or die"
"Sounds like a nice man" Diane rolled her eyes.
"Truly a prince amongst men" Tonks shook her head "The war he started lasted nearly twenty years, and cost the lives of nearly three hundred mages on both sides" She paused as Diane frowned "What?"
"How does a war last twenty years and only take three hundred lives?" Diane asked.
"Magical wars are not like muggles ones" Tonks replied, then - after a moment's thought - continued "Riddle was more like Bin Laden than Hitler - he lead a lot of people who were insanely loyal to him, and intended to overthrow the government by stealth, rather than force of arms"
"Oh - okay" Diane nodded "That's why the body count was so low" Tonks tilted her head to one side "I mean compared to wars in the muggle world" Tonks smiled and nodded.
"I suppose from that point of view, it was quite low" She sighed "Anyway - the war came to an end on Halloween, 1981 when Riddle was killed by a boy named Harry Potter" Diane opened her mouth "Yes - I do mean Agent Potter, and yes he was about eighteen months old at the time, and yes I can explain that later, and no - you should not ask him, or any one else in the Bureau about it" Diane smiled and closed her mouth again.
"Unfortunately, Riddle returned from the dead thirteen years later and restarted his war. It only lasted three years, and was brought to an end by most of the people you met out there" Diane stared at her for a few moments, frowning.
"They would have been what? Eighteen?" Tonks nodded "Wow"
"They don't like to talk about it much, but they are true heroes and some of the finest people I know" She smiled "I am proud to know them, and to have them working under me" She paused "Are you with me so far? Because I am just about at the point where everything changes and goes a little.... kaka" Diane nodded.
"Okay then" Tonks took a deep breath "By the time the war ended, Riddle only had thirty five followers left, and they were all sentenced to death for their crimes" She saw Diane frown "Crimes which included torturing, raping and murdering men, women and children, arson, terrorism and genocide - and crimes for which none of them showed any sort of remorse, instead boasting that they would do it again"
"What about Riddle?"
"Killed in the final battle of the war - by Agents Potter, Granger and Lovegood" Tonks replied "Again - not something you should ask them about" Diane nodded "As I said, all thirty five of his followers that survived were sentenced to death by our government. However one of the leading lights in our world - a man by the name of Professor Dumbledore - argued that they should not be put to death because the magical world needed their knowledge, skills and bloodlines"
"When Harry, Luna, Hermione and the others protested, Dumbledore, and a few of his most loyal supporters, attempted to turn them in to pariahs and outcasts - he marginalised them and started a series of rumours to suggest that their motives were not as pure as people thought" Tonks stopped as she realised how angry she sounded, and took a deep breath "Sorry - they have told me to let this go, but sometimes...." She trailed off "To give you an idea, the loyal supporters included Harry's godfather, Hermione's fiance and Luna's great-uncle"
"That's....." Diane trailed off "Did he succeed?"
"No" Tonks smiled "Despite spending a month trying ruin them, Dumbledore failed to stop the executions, and all thirty five were put to death" She paused "But because of what Dumbledore had tried to do, Harry, Luna, Hermione and fourteen other mages - including me - left the magical world for good. We cut all our ties - in some cases leaving our families and loved ones - because we didn't want to be a part of that world any more"
"Wow" Diane stared at her "Were all seventeen victims of Dumbledore's plot?"
"No" Tonks shook her head "Only eight were the subjects of the smear campaign. The rest of us came with them because we couldn't stomach what Dumbledore had done, and because to abandon the eight that were leaving would have been a betrayal of everything we believed" She took another deep breath "We left in July, 1998 and had every intention of never returning. Unfortunately, ten years later, almost to the very day, two members of our group were tortured to death, along with their parents"
"Oh god" Diane's hands flew up to her mouth "Was it mages?"
"Beyond a shadow of the doubt" Tonks nodded seriously "But when we went to the magical government to demand they punish the killers, they laughed at us and told us they would look in to it when they had the time. Apparently we forfeited all right to magical help when we left the magical world"
"Well - that sucks"
"Yes and no" Tonks waved her hand around "Two days after our confrontation with the government, we went to our government and made them a proposition we thought they'd like"
"A unit to investigate magical crimes against muggles?" Diane asked with a grin.
"The magical government only cares about protecting its secret - they are like The Volturi...."
"...only without the kindness and morals. If mages commit a crime against muggles, the muggles are obliviated - they have their memory of the incident removed - and the mages are told not to do it again. Maybe they are sent to prison for a few years, but nothing like the punishment they deserve" Tonks leaned back in her chair "The Volturi are the governing body of the vampire nation - something else I promise I will explain in due course"
"Oh - okay"
"Anyway - now magical criminals get brought to justice, their victims get a sense of closure...."
"And you get to stick it to the world you left behind?" Diane asked with a smirk.
"I won't say that isn't fun" Tonks admitted.
"Did you find the ones who killed your friends?"
"No" Tonks shook her head "It's still an open file, and we haven't given up, but so far...." She trailed off "Anyway - that's pretty much the history of our little unit and an explanation of what we do" She paused, then looked at Diane intently "So - what do you say?" Diane stared back at her in confusion.
"What do I say to what?"
"Do you want to come and work with us?" Tonks asked.
"You do know I'm not a witch, right?" Diane said after a few moments.
"I do actually know that, yes" Tonks laughed "But each team has a liaison to the muggle police - to help smooth over any problems like you and Agent Potter had earlier today - and there is a vacancy on Hermione's team. I'd like you to fill it" Diane stared at her for a few more moments, then smiled.
"Yes" She nodded "I do"
"Okay then" Tonks grinned "Despite our top secret nature, we are part of the police hierarchy, so it would only be a transfer, as opposed to changing jobs. Do you think your Inspector will agree?"
"I think so, yes" Diane nodded "Jacob might seem a bit gruff, but he just wants me to be happy"
"Jacob?" Tonks raised her eyebrows in surprise.
"He was one of my instructors during training, and he gave me my start at Covenstone. We've remained friends, even though he is my boss" Diane smiled "If he wants me to stay, I'll stay, but - like I said - I think he'll be happy for me"
"Very well" Tonks smiled "Talk to him tomorrow, and let me know what happens. If you are going to start, you'll need about a month of training - mostly to avoid you freaking out at the magical aspects of the job - and then you'll be sent out with Hermione's team" She stood up and held out her hand "Welcome aboard, Special Agent Radland" Diane shook her hand, smiling.
"Thank you, Director" She grinned "I'm sure the coming months will be very interesting"
"Oh yes" Diane said to herself, with a slight grin "Very interesting indeed".
Diane is sat in a theatre, watching a show featuring three magicians.
One of the magicians staring at Susan with a look of confusion.
A child, with a completely blank expression, walking towards a plain, black van.
Luna staring at a young woman with a disgusted expression.
Tracey Davis staring at a computer monitor with a confused expression.
A fleet of UFOs floating above a village.
Harry, Luna and Hermione approaching the burned out wreck of a car.
Oliver Wood showing a set of printed records to Tonks and Hermione.
Tonks staring down at the body of a woman lying on a metal table.
Oliver handing a floppy disc to Hermione.
Hermione and her team approaching a large warehouse.
The inside of the warehouse full of spell fire of various colours.
Harry, Hermione and Luna stood in front of Tonks, who has a shocked expression.
Series 1 of "Harry Potter, MIB"
A final shot of two people with red hair watching Harry and Hermione from an elevated walkway.