Table 3 - Comedy / Humor
|01. Laughter||02. Prank||03. Joke||04. "I didn't do it"||05. Humiliation|
|06. Caught in the act||07. If at first you don't succeed||08. Truth or dare||09. Backfired!||10. A picture's worth a thousand words|
Okay, so it's not like Ryan was really going to reenact Saw with Jim as Cary Elwes. He doesn't know what he was thinking, though he mostly blames being under the influence of Dwight. He's met plenty of out there people - not just in New York - but none actually measure up to the level of strangeness that is Dwight Schrute.
Now, Jim's back to being a salesman, and whatever jealously and indignant emotions he had have mostly gone away (he's still upset about...other things, but that's his own deal and the last fucking thing he'd ever share with Dwight). He wonders if Michael will let him move his desk back.
04. "I didn't do it"
The scowl Ryan's currently sporting would be much more menacing, if not for the large twirling mustache in black ink on his upper lip.
"Wasn't me." Jim says, though he's biting at his lips trying not to smile.
"You're the only one with a Sharpie in his hand!"
"Oh my God, this is great! 'Ryan looked really hot today', 'Ryan's new glasses really make his eyes stand out', 'Ryan sat next to me in the conference room today'. Jim, these are hilarious, where'd you get Michael's journal?"
"Uhm...actually, that's mine..."
06. Caught in the act
"What in the world are you watching?"
Ryan gives a full bodied spasm at the sudden - unwelcome - sound of Jim coming up behind the couch. When he frantically searches for the remote among the spilled popcorn he sees it's been flung onto the floor, just out of reach. All he can do is take a deep, steadying - hopefully unnoticed - breath and steel himself against the onslaught of teasing that is sure to follow. He can practically feel Jim's smug, self-satisfied smirk on the back of his neck.
Ryan continues to pretend he's watching the television, though he's actually waiting for Jim's comments, which never come.
"Which one is this?" The question catches him off guard and before he knows what he's saying, he answers.
"The one where Heather Locklear sees a murder and goes crazy."
Jim hums in acknowledgement and Ryan finally untenses when he moves around the couch and flops down beside him. Ryan watches him with a wary look until Jim asks him to pass the popcorn. Ryan hands over the now half empty bowl and Jim gives it a look before reaching over and picking a piece out of Ryan's hair and popping it in his mouth.
"Come here." he says to Ryan's suspicious look and Ryan hesitantly scoots closer until Jim swings an arm around his shoulder and he sighs and melts into the touch. He laughs as Jim abandons the bowl and starts picking popcorn off the sofa. Just two boyfriends, watching Lifetime movies on a Sunday afternoon.
08. Truth or dare
They can't remember when the game started. It was years ago. They know why it started, of course: boredom. The kind of boredom that Dunder Mifflin Scranton produces better and more frequently than paper. And that need to bridge the gap between dragging themselves into work in the morning and the second the clock hits five is why they've continued playing it.
A while ago Jim and Pam's game stopped being "Truth or Dare" and simply became "Dare" (unless one wants to know something from the other and the other is being difficult) and it's not surprising to know that most of the dares involve Dwight. Or rather, pranks on Dwight and various other means of annoying him.
"Dwight Dares" range from anything from hiding all of his bobbleheads to hiding his bobbleheads in the trunk of his car (and you can't imagine what Jim had to do to get Dwight's car keys). Pam once locked all his desk drawers and placed each key inside of a different drawer, Jim once wrote a very detailed, flowery love note from Dwight to Michael (Michael didn't talk to him for the better part of a week, culminating in Dwight actually admitting his version of love for Michael, in a pathetic rendition of "Oh Captain, My Captain" complete with Dwight standing on his desk) and one ambitious prank - that was supposed to be Jim's but Pam ended up getting in on it too - ended up with Dwight's desk, computer and all, on the roof.
But not every dare involves Dwight. They avoid Michael, as a general rule (not to spare him but rather themselves) but otherwise the office, and its inhabitants, are fair game.
Pam rocks back in forth in her chair, smirking as she thinks about her next dare for Jim. Jim's was that Pam buy, and wear, a pair of Crocs. It ended up backfiring - they're surprisingly comfortable, especially to a pregnant woman - so Pam wants to make hers good, just so she'll be that much more ahead.
"I dare you to kiss..." Pam says pursing her lips. Flirting with other employees has always been on the docket for their little game. Oscar stills gives Jim a suspicious look every time he gets close. Kissing, however, is a big step up and Pam knows she's pushing it but the way Jim's eyebrows disappear into his floppy bangs makes her feel smug.
"Ooh, Halpert," Jim says and she smiles inwardly at the name change, "you're playing with fire there."
"Oh, am I?" she says with a shake of her head and she can tell Jim's trying not to be amused.
Pam bites at the end of her pencil and scans the bullpen. Now, who gets to be the hapless victim? She skips over Accounting. They've already traumatized Oscar and Angela would probably press charges. She's tempted to say Meredith but then decides she really doesn't want Meredith thinking Jim's actually into her. Stanley and Phyllis are no's, but Andy has some potential. She momentarily lands on Dwight's empty chair (he's pestering Michael, or planning something with him, neither one can be good) and then looks at Jim who's vehemently shaking his head no.
At that moment, a file lands on Pam's desk in front of her and she jumps and turns to find Ryan, scowling down at her (that part she doesn't take too personally, he scowls at everyone lately).
"Can I get these reports back by 2?" He asks, pushing up his pointless glasses.
She squints at her watch, "It's almost 1:30."
"Yeah, shouldn't take you that long." Ryan replies and turns on his heel to retreat to the annex.
Pam spins back in her chair, slams a hand on top of the report and says, "Ryan. I dare you to kiss Ryan."
If it's possible, Jim's eyebrows rise even further and he sputters a little and looks back and forth between Pam and the door that leads to the kitchen. "Ryan?" he asks.
Pam just grits her teeth and nods.
It takes Jim a little while to get up his nerve, so Pam does work on the report, all the while thinking about the stupid expression on Ryan's face when Jim plants one on him. Right before 2 o' clock Jim takes a deep breath and pushes himself up from his desk. Pam gives an evil grin and shuts the report and follows.
Jim walks determinedly to the kitchen door and swings it open, Pam right at his heels. She blinks in surprise when they reach the kitchen to find the door to the annex opening at the same time and Ryan walking through with Kelly a step behind him.
Somewhere about dead center of the kitchen, Jim and Ryan collide and while Pam was expecting the kind of reckless abandon Jim goes at pranks for the sake of their amusement, she wasn't expecting Ryan to grab Jim by his hair and smash their mouths together.
Her own mouth drops open and her eyes go big at the sight of Jim and Ryan kissing, right in the office kitchen. Both their eyes are closed and it's, ahem, open mouthed, she can tell from here and the vision sends a strange little thrill through her. She hears Kelly gasp and looks over Jim and Ryan's shoulders to find her with a matched shocked expression, her hands up to her mouth.
Jim and Ryan pull apart with a wet sound that makes Pam feel momentarily light headed. Neither says anything but they share a curt nod and both pivot and head back in opposite directions. Jim brushes by Pam and she can't help but let out a stunned laugh.
"You did it! I can't believe you did it! I mean, I said to do it but I can't believe you did it!" Kelly's excited voice follows Ryan as he pushes by her back to the annex.
Pam looks up in time to catch Kelly's eye, and she feels the slow beginning of a smile. It takes Kelly a second but then she gets the same glint of mischief in her eyes.
A few days after the Dare that Backfired - as she's taken to calling it in her head - Pam checks her fridge, again, to make sure there's plenty of beer. When she's pacified she closes the door and goes looking for Jim.
He's in the living room, sprawled on the couch watching tv. She grins at him.
"Hey," she says and sidles up to his side. He looks up at her with a look that turns quizzical.
"Hey," he says and tilts his chin up, "what's with you?"
"With me? What do you mean?" Pam asks, all faux innocence.
"I don't like the look in your eyes Halpert, what's going on?" He sits up on the couch and narrows his eyes at her.
She just grins wider, "Oh, nothing."
It's then that the doorbell rings and Pam goes for it with a skip in her step and calls out, "I'll get it!" behind her.
She flings open the door to a really giddy looking Kelly and a less than enthusiastic Ryan.
"Come in, come in!" She says, more to Kelly, with a waving gesture of her hand. Kelly practically bounces into the house, dragging Ryan by one of his arms.
Pam leads them into the living room and Jim looks and gapes like a fish at the sight of them. Kelly makes sure to plop down in a chair and Pam into the other chair so Ryan stands awkwardly by the couch, where Jim's shoved himself up against the side closest to Pam. Ryan finally sits down on the other side with a glower.
Kelly and Pam smile stupidly at each other for a beat and Pam opens her mouth to talk...
"So, are we doing this?" Ryan chimes in first and Pam feels the surprise take over her face.
"Uhm," She manages.
Ryan looks over to Jim and Jim seems to have caught on and he looks to his wife.
"Well..." Pam starts again but this time it's Kelly who cuts her off.
"Yes! I mean, yes, we want you to!" she says, grinning ear to ear.
Jim and Ryan share a look again, for a long moment before they turn back to the girls.
"Alright." They say and move toward each other on the couch.
Pam gets that giddy little thrill again at the sight of her husband and Ryan just inches away from kissing. But then they stop.
Pam almost whines in disappointment. Jim and Ryan turn to them with twin looks of amusement.
Jim cards his fingers through the hair at the base of Ryan's neck as he says, "But first we want to make a deal." The look he gives passes between her and Kelly is devilish.
Pam turns to Kelly, who looks dumbstruck but then she kind of shrugs with a little flutter of her eyes and Pam turns back to the boys with a smug smirk.
Oh, they can work something out alright.