Okay, so the thing is: Hikaru got used to Sai's intensity. Sai wasn't all fluff and swishy hair and amusing distractions with umbrellas and vending machines. Sai was like a thousand years of intensity, coming at you with a blade ten hours a day. Think fast! No, no. Faster than that. Push your boundaries. Never stop challenging yourself! Get it so deep down in your bones that you don't need to think. Read so far ahead, that your reaction is faster than thought.
And when Sai was gone, Hikaru missed that. Along with the soul-deep ache of just plain missing Sai, there was that missing rush of intensity.
Sure, he got a little surge of it whenever he played Go, but not nearly as much as he’d grown accustomed to. And it wasn’t the sort of thing you could get from friends. It was the sort of thing you could only get from a rival. It was something he could only get from Touya. It was something only he could give to Touya. And as they got a little older, they discovered more ways that they could give it to each other.
Waya and Isumi were always getting on his case about how much he fights with Touya. Couldn’t he and Touya give it a break already? Shindou, we get it. You can stop acting out now. You’re rivals, and we're all bored with it.
Yeah, right. Their fights weren't for other people. And the ones that Waya and Isumi and the others got to see and sometimes overhear from the next room? Those weren't really fights.
Those were foreplay.
He didn't plan for it, and he's not entirely sure why Touya needs it. Touya didn’t grow up with a ghost, after all. But then... well, Hikaru suspects that growing up playing every day against a major title holder had put a permanent chip on Touya's shoulder that very few people could appreciate quite the way Hikaru can. Sai had seen it, though, hadn’t he? As much as Sai talked about Touya Meijin’s aura and longed to play against him, he’d never called the Meijin a lion or a dragon. Only Hikaru’s Touya had that extra edge of ferocity.
The first time, it just happened and maybe it got a little nasty, but the fact that they keep doing it shows that really, a little nasty was exactly what they both wanted.
The only regret Hikaru ever had about that first time was the carpet burn. They're a bit more careful now, in a way that's not any less rough. If there's carpet, Hikaru will find himself up against a wall or a door instead. Or maybe bent over a table... Or there was that one time, when Touya knocked his legs so wide apart that Hikaru ended up bent double, just trying to find purchase, hands and feet fighting to stay in place while his ass was high in the air. And Touya just kept at him.
Hikaru slowly slid across the carpet until, fuck, his head was actually knock, knock, knocking against the closet door with every push of Touya's hips. Which yes, gave them a laugh later on, but right then it was "Oh, oh, fuck, I can't believe, I'm going to end up with a concussion or something, oh fuck, yeah, yeah--"
And the more the closet door banged, the harder Touya gave it to him.
And yeah, in that position, he couldn't see anything but the floor and Touya's feet, but he knew that bastard had to be smiling. Smiling ever wider as he banged Hikaru into door.
And then, because Touya isn't just any bastard, but a brilliant fucking evil bastard, he didn't let them come that way, no. At the very last moment, when Hikaru was ready to scream and his knees were ready to crumple and he was just going to fall apart and fall to the floor and Touya would just have to drop to the floor and risk his own knees to the carpet if he wanted to keep it up, then Touya pulled out and whipped Hikaru around.
Hikaru's legs went, and his sore ass hit the floor. He gasped and looked up, and Touya came on his face. Just shot his load all over Hikaru's face, no warning at all.
And Hikaru would have yelled at him, 'cause that was pretty fucking rude, right? 'Cept it made Hikaru lose it completely.
He was coming before Touya could get a hand on him and he blanked out for a moment, because the next thing he knew, Touya was kneeling between his legs, pulling Hikaru close, and licking, licking his own come off of Hikaru's face.
It would have blown Hikaru's mind, if it hadn't been completely blown away already.
So, yeah. Touya was an evil kinky bastard, but at least Hikaru didn't get rug burn anymore. And while he’d miss Sai until the day he died, at least he was living a little closer to the way Sai had taught him: never resting, always learning, always pushing the boundaries--and pushing them hard.