Work Text:
For such a large and prestigious facility, the Secret Service offices had a surprisingly meek break room. With a white tile floor, an old couch or two, a fridge with a broken door handle, and a counter with a sink and few coffeepots, it certainly didn’t scream ‘espionage and prestige’. But most importantly, it was usually a relatively quiet place that an agent could relax for a few minutes and ingest some precious caffeine before getting back to work. Leon was not usually the type to spend any amount of time in there, but it was where they kept the coffee, so avoiding it completely was impossible.
Whistling under his breath, the agent started hunting around in the cabinets for some kind of cup. The things were never in any kind of standardized place, so he was pretty sure that at least two people were having some kind of organizational warfare at everyone else’s expense.
“Hey! Whazzat? Looks like somebody got lucky.” Scratch that, it was usually quiet. Out to rain on that parade was one Bruce McGivern, Special Agent. A scruffy-looking man that had a few inches on his fellow agent, the Texas native was a guy that had, like Leon, been transferred from STRATCOM’s Anti-Umbrella unit after the organization’s fall. What the man was referring to, Leon wasn’t sure, but it could have been any number of small things, including the slightly sore way he was walking, his overall cheer, or, equally possible, he hadn’t actually noticed anything and was just hunting for some blackmail.
“You know, McGivern, some people drop the whole ‘kiss and tell’ thing after high school.” Sure, the other agent usually grated on his nerves, but quite frankly, Leon was in too good of a mood today to care, and, as a result, only offered the sarcastic response with half of the usual venom.
“So I heard. Knew you was quite the playboy after hours.” The Texan offered a broad grin. Leon rolled his eyes, the guy could be such a moron sometimes.
“I’m sure it’s nothing next to you, the master of seduction.” More sarcasm, maybe this time enough to get him to drop it. Hopefully it wasn’t going to backfire and get Bruce to start going on about his own exploits.
“Musta been real good, you’re not bitin’ my head off.” The agent waggled his eyebrows and Leon let out a soft groan. It was true, some of the time Bruce’s semi-obnoxious personality just rubbed him the wrong way. Worse, he hardly seemed to take the job seriously.
“Bite your head off? I would never. Perish the thought.” Leon located the styrofoam cups as he spoke, pulling them down from the top shelf. Bruce snatched one from his hands and began pouring himself a lukewarm coffee.
“Hah, it was Hunnigan, wasn’t it?”
The resulting silence from Leon was impossibly thick, matched with the dumbfounded expression on his face as he stared straight over Bruce’s shoulder.
“What? Did I get it? I knew she’s some kinda repressed closet nympho—”
“You know she’s standing right behind you.” Leon remarked quietly.
“Whaaa—”
“For the record, Agent McGivern, you are wrong on both counts. It has also come to my attention that you are of the opinion that I am capable of breathing fire and would eat any boyfriend I ever had ‘like some kind of black widow spider’. These allegations are also false and I am, for your information, engaged.” With that, she turned on her heel and left the break room, coffee mug still empty.
Bruce broke the awkward silence first. “You mean you actually—”
“Oh, hell no. Since when has she been engaged?”
“Dunno. Does she even wear a ring?”
“No idea, but you should probably expect a harassment report on your desk tomorrow.”