Darya pushed open the door to Kolya's room. She couldn't tell if he was awake before she walked in but he turned at the door opening. He looked at her in surprise, though he had to have expected that this was coming. Perhaps it had only been building in her, perhaps he was still unaware.
She walked over to the bed, crawling in with him before he had a chance to say anything. He sat up and his arms came up she wasn't sure if he meant to push her away but she didn't let him. He ended up awkwardly embracing her, delicately as if he was afraid she would break. Darya leaned in to kiss him but stilled as he pulled away.
“We can't—” He broke off.
Darya simply said, “Yes,” and before she had finished the word he closed the gap between them.
It was a hard kiss, neither one of them willing to give up control over the moment. The tension of the past months coming out in this one kiss. All the worry and anger and grief they'd been holding in finally getting expressed.
Darya slid one of her hands into his hair trying to angle herself so they wouldn't have to break off the kiss. She kneeled over his lap, her knees braced on each side of his hips. She urged herself closer until her whole body was flush against his.
Her other hand rested on the bare skin of his neck and shoulder as she tugged him closer. She ran her hand down his back and she could feel his muscles contract as he held her close. She followed the path of her hand with her mouth, kissing Kolya's neck just where it met his shoulder.
One of Kolya's hands found it's way to her leg. He left it cupping her knee, one finger questing further, then another, until his whole hand slid up her thigh and under her nightshirt. It slid high, coming to rest on her hip, one finger slipping into her panties. His other hand stayed behind her back, as if somehow he could urge her even closer.
She didn't need much urging, Darya's entire world had condensed to the bedroom, to the bed, to the space between the two of them. She didn't want to think of anything else, she couldn't think of anything else.
He pulled away from her but then reclaimed her mouth with a kiss that was even stronger than before. She returned it with equal fervor, eager to feel her lips on his again. They lost themselves in the kiss, or at least Darya did. Kolya's lips felt so good next to hers. The kiss deepened easily. She focussed on it, didn't let her mind wander to any of the things that usually occupied her. None of them existed tonight.
Kolya broke off the kiss with a strangled moan. He stared her straight in the eye, Darya wasn't sure what he expected to find but she didn't care. Every part of her that mattered wanted to do this, especially her broken heart. Whatever he saw it reassured him and he flipped them easily, not surprising to Darya given the dancer's strength in his legs. She relished the momentary loss of control as he pinned her beneath him on the bed.
His hand stayed beneath her nightshirt urging her panties down. She lifted her hips to help him along, while she moved her own hands to the waistband of his pants. He took the hint, and helped her get rid of them as well. He leaned down to kiss her again and she leaned up into it while she urged her shirt up over her head. The kiss broke just long enough for her to remove the shirt. Finally there was nothing between them but skin.
With all barriers removed it was easy to fall into the rhythm of sex that came so easily to all people. They had no familiarity in this area, Darya had done her best to avoid most physical contact with Kolya at all since leaving Russia but they fit together seamlessly. Her body rose to meet his as they joined together.
Darya wrapped her legs around Kolya's waist, locking them together on the bed. She kept her eyes open the entire time, staring into Kolya's face as he stayed above her. He leaned down, his mouth grazing against hers briefly. Even as the kiss broke off his face lingered near hers, their breath mingling intimately.
She wrapped both arms around his neck, tugging him closer and closer as she felt her release build inside of her. She tensed as she felt it wash over her, tightening around Kolya before collapsing in a boneless heap of pleasure. She felt Kolya follow her into release and fall on top of her. His body pressed her into the mattress, but she had no desire for him to move.
He rolled to the side, disentangling them somewhat. “We should--”
She placed one hand over his mouth. “In the morning.”
Kolya quieted. Darya grabbed one of his arms, tugging it until it rested around her. Firmly encircled in his arms she dropped off into dreamless sleep.
The phone rang while Darya was still tangled in bed with Kolya. She barely stirred as he got out of bed to answer it. He was gone for only a minute but as soon as he returned she could tell what the phone call had meant from the look on his face.
“They're going to do it.”
He didn't need to say any more. There was only one thing that the two of them had talked about over the past months. Only one thing that would cause that look.
She crawled out of bed, avoiding Kolya's eyes. What had seemed so right last night was ruined. Was any other outcome possible? Some part of Darya knew that she would have come the night before even if she had known this call would come today. It had been inevitable, she had just delayed it for as long as possible.
Kolya tried to catch her arm as she walked out of the room. She moved just enough so that he couldn't touch her.
“This never happened,” she hissed as she brushed past him. Darya didn't look back as she walked to her own room. She couldn't.