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Derek blinks a few times when he opens the door and sees Spencer standing on his doorstep. He’s wrapped in a parka, but still clearly shivering, and covered in a light dusting of snow, looking lost and forlorn.
“Spencer?” he asks through a yawn. “What are you doing here? It’s past midnight.”
Spencer looks embarrassed. “I know, I’m sorry,” he says. He bites his lip. “Can I come in? Please?”
Derek shakes his head. “Yeah, shit. Sorry. C’mon.” He steps to the side to let Spencer come in out of the cold and snow. “Is everything okay?”
Spencer stands near the door, rubbing his arms and fidgeting, like he doesn’t quite know how to act. “Yeah, um, I’m fine.”
Something has to be going on for Spencer to be so inarticulate. “Are you sure?” Derek asks, stepping close to Spencer. Spencer looks at him, eyes bright behind his glasses, hair in disarray. He was probably sleeping before he came over – Derek can see a trace of a pillow crease on Spencer’s right cheek.
Spencer nods. “The, um, heater went out,” he says. “It was cold. Really cold, even with multiple blankets. I couldn't sleep, and I just thought…” He trails off, looking uncertain, and he bites his lip again.
Derek gently tugs Spencer’s lip out from between his teeth. “You thought you’d come over here to get warmed up, is that it?” he says quietly. He doesn’t wait for Spencer to answer and he presses his lips to Spencer’s cold ones. Spencer sighs softly, opening his mouth. Derek slips his tongue inside, and they kiss for a few moments, tender and sweet, before their lips part.
They’re still figuring things out. A few months ago, Spencer was grazed by a bullet the unsub they were tracking fired off before Derek could take him down. It was too close of a call – Derek knew after this that he couldn’t keep quiet about his changing and growing feelings for Spencer. Spencer was surprised when Derek wouldn’t leave the hospital, staying with him even though he was fine and would be released in a few hours, but Derek was adamant.
Derek wasn’t able to find the words he wanted to say to explain, not when Spencer was right in front of him, hurt and confused, looking at Derek in that intense and penetrating way, and before he knew it, he was leaning forward and kissing Spencer, desperate to taste his lips. He was half-expecting Spencer to push him back and ask what the hell he was doing, but to Derek’s supreme astonishment and relief, it only took a couple seconds for Spencer to relax in his embrace and return the kiss. After kissing for long, glorious minutes, they talked, both of them unable to hold back their smiles, and by the time Spencer was released, they decided that that they wanted to explore what was between them.
They’ve been taking things slowly since then. They haven’t even had sex yet, at least not penetrative sex. And while Spencer’s been at his place and he’s been at Spencer’s, they haven’t spent the night together yet, either. It’s a big step forward, but Derek finds he wants to take it; he’s not feeling any anxiety or apprehension at the thought of Spencer in his bed, sleeping with him, sharing his personal space. He wants Spencer here with him, wants to share that intimacy.
He feels something in his chest swell at the thought that Spencer came to him instead of going to some hotel, and unable to resist, he traces the curve of Spencer’s cheek, smiling at the light flush, and brushes another kiss over Spencer’s mouth.
Spencer’s eyes flutter closed and he exhales shakily even as he leans into the touch. “Derek…”
“I want you to stay,” Derek says, running a hand through Spencer’s hair, messing it up even more. “Stay with me.” He unzips Spencer’s parka and slides it off his shoulders, tossing it on the nearby couch. He grins at the sight of Spencer’s vintage Star Trek t-shirt, and then he wraps Spencer up his arms, one hand cradling his neck and the other on the small of his back, and tugs him tightly against his chest. Spencer’s arms go around his shoulders, holding on and seeking body heat, and he puts his head in the curve of Derek’s neck, breathing deep and even.
When Derek has Spencer close like this, relaxed and trusting and comfortable, it feels perfect, right every time. Derek never wants to let him go, and tonight and hopefully many other nights, he doesn’t have to. “C’mon,” he whispers into Spencer’s ear. “Let’s go to bed.”
Spencer nods against his shoulder and his arms tighten around Derek, pressing closer.
Derek smiles and strokes the back of Spencer’s neck. “You won’t need that jacket,” he says. “I’ll keep you warm.”
He’s pretty sure what he means is I love you.
END
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