I want pie.
They’re all sitting in MacLaren's, after work on December 22nd, and Marshall is exhausted. He’s working on a big case and the only reason he’s not at the office right now is that the holiday is looming and Honeywell & Cootes is the sort of firm that cares if you get to spend holiday nights with your family.
Also, he’s pretty sure there was a plan that had something to do with a stripper, but he’d been too tired to even come up with a funny way of shutting them down. Not too tired for drinks, though, and so he’d had two beers and was listening to Barney talk for the fortieth minute about something that was spilled on his suit a week ago and has since been dry-cleaned. Twice.
But what Marshall really wants, what he really needs, is pie.
So he catches Lily’s eye and focuses.
She’s seen him. She knows what he’s doing.
I want pie.
Oh, that would be yummy!
What’s pie a euphemism for? Somehow, Ted has caught on too, meeting Marshall’s eyes and, honestly, three way telepathic conversations are not the easiest to manage.
Dude! Marshall’s eyes bulge a bit, and Ted looks back and forth between Marshall and Lily and then raises his glass in a toast to them and turns back to Barney, leaving them to it.
Whatever. Lily, pie?
Right. But where?
It’s been the major contention this year. Lily’s been so busy she hasn’t spent the last two weeks baking, the way she usually would have, and Marshall’s sudden, shaky pie withdrawals might be linked to this.
Then, the light goes on. An epiphany moment.
Ted! Marshall’s staring wounds in the back of Ted’s head, trying to get him to turn around. TED!
When he finally does, it’s with a knowing smirk. Get your pie all planned out, did you?
There’s a leer to his thoughts, and Lily’s nose wrinkles but Marshall plods on.
There’s pie in your apartment, right?
Ted looks confused, then a little disgusted, then it shifts back to confused as he realizes he’s probably been misreading them. He’s aware it sometimes happens, but between Marshall and Lily, at this time of year, he’d have bet Barney even money that it was sex. Not food. Except -
Wait, we’re talking about actual pie?
It’s Barney’s hand that slaps him upside the back of his head. “Pay attention, Mosby.” He says, and then, “Marshall wants to know if crazy-eyes - “
“She has a name!”
“If crazy-eyes that you’re dating made good on her promise to bake you pie.”
So, yes, actual pie then, and Ted sighs and gives Marshall a shrug that means ‘yes’ and also ‘she has crazy-eyes too? You never told me.’
Dude, it’s Christmas. Marshall thinks, and a few minutes later he and Lily are unlocking Ted’s door and heading for paradise.