“Are you fucking kidding me? Chad! Get your fucking ass back to this fucking stinkhole right the fuck now!” Jared kicks angrily at the little bottle of lube lying at his feet.
“I don’t think he can hear you,” Jensen drawls. “Seeing as how they’re on the ship and we’re down here.”
Jared turns around and glares at Jensen, who’s sitting on a dusky boulder, legs spread and elbows resting on his knees. The dark washed material of his jeans is pulling tightly at the inseam, leading Jared’s eyes right to where he really shouldn’t look.
Annoyed, Jared looks up where the Ardnek is slowly disappearing in the sky.
“You know,” Jensen says pensively, “this wouldn’t have happened if you had more control over your crew.”
“That’s what I mean. You’re all bark, no bite, they know it.”
“I’ll show you bite,” Jared says and regrets it the next moment. There’s way too much truth in that statement. Which is why he’s sitting out here on this uninhabited pathetic excuse of a planet in the first place.
They had just landed to make a deal, trading stolen medical supplies for ammunition. It had gone off without a hitch for once in their lives and everybody had been happy. Jensen had given Jared his small private smile and said, “not too bad.”
Jared had grinned back like the idiot he was, still inordinately pleased when Jensen complimented his leadership qualities and then suddenly they’d been the only ones left on the ground, Chad closing the entrance to the ship.
“So there’s a little entertainment station coming through. Me and the crew are gonna go check it out, see if we can win some games and when we’re done, we’re gonna come back and get you.”
“What?” Jared and Jensen had said in unison.
Felicia had poked her head out next to Chad and nodded vigorously. “Oh yes. It’s time you stop dancing around each other like two prepubescent idiots.”
“Do you want to go steady?” Chad asked in a high voice. “Yes, no, or maybe?”
“So,” Felicia continued. “Work it out. Fuck it out. We’ll be back!”
Then Chad had given them a dirty smile and thrown a little white bottle to Jared’s feet. “Have fun!”
And just like that, the gangway had pulled in, the door had closed and Jared and Jensen were left on a planet that didn’t even have a name while Jared’s crew was off to get drunk on the next floating dive bar.
He was surprised by how well Jensen was handling it.
“They’ll be back,” was all he said, before plopping down on a boulder, plucking a strawy blade of long grass from the ground and chewing on it. Jared had to look away otherwise he’d imagine Jensen wrapping his lips around his dick and that was not going to happening. Unfortunately.
Not because Jared hadn’t tried, because he had, years ago, when they had still lived on the Old Home. But Jensen had chosen to leave for the Academy, rather than making his luck on Jared’s admittedly questionable heap of scrap metal with an insane first mate and a crate of droid parts as their only trading goods.
Then the war had happened, the Academy had gone up in flames like the rest of the capital, and four months later, Jared found himself picking Jensen up in dodgy secession outpost, cooking the meals in a whorehouse that didn’t even try to look like a bar.
They’d hugged and Jared had smiled so wide he’d almost cried, because despite everything that had happened, that was still Jensen, his sandbox love and childhood friend. Jensen had hugged him right back and declared he wouldn’t be a charity case. Jared had agreed and now, almost a year later, Jensen had proven he could pull his weight.
He cooks for the crew, and a good chef is really invaluable on long space trips, but he’s also observant, an ice cold negotiator, and not too bad with a gun. He’s smart and funny in that dry sarcastic way, he made friends with the rest of the crew - in short, he fits in perfectly - and Jared curses his stupid dick for not remembering that Jensen doesn’t want to be more than friends.
Unfortunately, his stupid dick refuses to get the memo - in all fairness, neither does his heart - doesn’t even care that they’re marooned on a planet by their own crew out of some misguided matchmaking intentions. No, even though they’re stranded - at least for tonight - on this shitty little thing, his dick still appreciates how the two suns throw their golden light on Jensen’s skin, lighting up the freckles that never really come out in the artificial cabin lights. His dick appreciates Jensen digging out their old clothes from home, dark blue jeans with fraying edges and a checked button-down in gray and black. Well, to be honest, Jared and his dick appreciate the whole package. Jensen of course, is oblivious.
He’s staring unseeingly into the distance, chewing on the piece of straw. Jared surreptitiously tries to adjust himself in his pants and when Jensen looks over, he pretends it’s his thigh holster he’s fiddling with. For a moment, Jensen stares, then a derisive expression crosses his face.
“Don’t know why you insist on wearing that stupid thing when it doesn’t even fit.”
“It fits just fine, thank you,” Jared snaps. It’s not the thigh holster’s fault Jared’s dick doesn’t behave.
For some reason that just makes Jensen glare. “Whatever.”
“What happened to you being all zen about this?” Jared asks.
Jensen makes an irritated noise, mumbles something Jared doesn’t catch and if looks could kill, Jared’s thigh holster would be a charred heap of leather.
The tension in the air becomes unbearable, so Jared paces. Jensen sits and stares and chews. It’s the most uncomfortable ten minutes of Jared’s life, even trumping the time Chad had pushed him down a dumpster chute to hide from a confederation patrol.
It’s Jensen who breaks the silence. He never did well with Jared’s nervous habits.
“So, we gonna talk about it?”
“What, about my delusional crew?”
Jensen snorts. “Yes. Emphasis on your crew.”
Jared glares. “Hey, they’re yours too!”
“Excuse me? You’re the captain.”
“Yeah, but ever since you started baking muffins, they follow you around like lost little ducklings.”
Jensen throws his hand up. “They don’t - I mean - wait, are you actually jealous?”
No, Jared is not. Or well, if he’s honest with himself, he wouldn’t be, if it was actually their crew. Lately, it had just felt as if they’d split into two camps, the kitchen and the cargo area. Jared can’t remember when he’d started avoiding the kitchen. Probably around the time they’d left Nublar. Which had nothing to do with Jensen spending two nights on another ship. Nothing at all.
“I’m not jealous,” Jared says, and he knows exactly how defensive he sounds.
Jensen just rolls his eyes. Then he puts the grass straw back into his mouth and viciously hacks the stem into little pieces with his front teeth. When he’s done, he gets up.
“Look, I know that we’re not, I mean that this is not… Fuck. And I don’t know why they think they have to chose, because it’s not like they’re the kids in our divorce-”
“More like the dogs,” Jared mumbles, even though he thinks it’s kind of unfair of Jensen to use that particular metaphor since they never even dated. They never got that far because Jensen shot him down.
Jensen laughs, corners of his eyes crinkling and all. Fucker. “Okay, so we’ll just tell them to quit it and they’ll have to deal with it.”
Jared nods. “Yeah. And I mean, we can hang out. I mean, fuck, we were friends. What the fuck happened to us?”
It’s a dumb question to ask, because he knows the answer - Jensen picked somebody else, Jensen doesn't want him, never wanted him like that - and Jensen knows it too.
But instead of taking it as the rhetorical question it is, Jensen glares at Jared.
“You’re asking me? You’re the one who shut me out! And yeah, okay, I realize I made you uncomfortable, and I’m sorry, but I thought you could get over that.”
“What ‘what’?” Jensen asks impatiently.
“Um, everything?” Jared has no clue what Jensen is talking about. None.
Jensen drags a hand through his hair. “That time we stayed on Nublar. You’ve been weird ever since.”
“Oh, yeah.” Jared draws in a deep breath, vowing to be the bigger person here. Jensen deserves happiness. “I’m sorry about that. You can obviously do whatever you want and I don’t want you to think you have to hide it. I won’t… it’ll be fine the next time, I promise.”
Jensen snorts. “Yeah, I don’t think I’ll be getting that drunk anytime soon again.”
Jared closes his eyes. He does not want to hear accounts of Jensen's drunken escapades, because he knows how loose limbed Jensen gets when he’s drunk, how touchy and how much he smiles. Imagining that, just instead of draped over Jared, he’d be sitting in another guy’s lap and, no, that’s really not good.
“And I’m done pining. I promise. I know it’s never gonna happen, but I think that was kind of rock bottom, so yeah…”
“You’re still pining after him?” Jared can’t stop himself from asking. “Jensen, why didn’t you say something? We could go back!”
There’s nothing Jared wants less, because oh fuck what if Jensen wanted to stay with that asshole? But he’s still trying to be a bigger person.
Jensen’s just looking confused though. “Go back? To whom?”
“Jared, what guy?” Jensen asks, looking at Jared like he’s lost his mind.
Does he have to say it? “The guy you hooked up with!”
Jensen scrunches up his face. “The guy… Jared, what exactly do you think happened on Nublar?”
“Well, I try very hard not to think about what exactly happened, not really something I wanna imagine, you with another guy.”
“Me and another guy.” Jensen says flatly.
“You thought,” Jensen says, face giving nothing away. “You thought I was getting drunk and hooking up with another guy on Nublar.”
Jared’s pretty sure his face is making the well-duh expression.
“And you’re uncomfortable about this,” Jensen continues slowly, like he’s working through the meal plan for the next month on a week’s worth of supplies, “because you don’t like me hooking up with another guy.”
“Jensen, you can sleep with-”
“Because you want to hook up with me,” Jensen finishes, mercilessly.
Jared glares, because really, do they have to spell it out?
Jensen wets his lips, suddenly looking nervous. “Is it only hooking up?”
“Do you only want to hook up with me or is it more?”
Jared groans and walks over the the big boulder foundation on whose outcrops Jensen had been sitting. He leans his back against a smooth part of the wall and closes his eyes.
“I told you I loved you the first time when I was five and you threw a mud cake at my face. I don’t really think I ever stopped.”
There’s silence and when he opens his eyes again, Jensen is standing a foot across from him, looking at him with a mix of amazement and anger.
“You stupid idiot.”
And then he kisses him.
Jared needs a moment to process what’s going on, because there are lips on his mouth, warm, soft lips, Jensen’s lips, and they’re moving, and there's tongue and maybe a little bit of teeth and fuck, Jared’s not exactly sure what’s going on except that it’s fucking fantastic.
Still, he can’t just have Jensen kissing him for some unfathomable reason. That’s just asking for heartache. More than he already has.
“Jensen, stop.” He realizes he’s out of breath and Jensen grumbles when Jared pushes him back, but really. What the fuck?
“What?” Jensen asks.
“What? What do you mean, what? Why are…. what the hell?”
“You want me,” Jensen says, “You love me. You just said so.” Like that explains it all. Except it doesn’t.
“When you came on board, you told me you wouldn’t be a charity case. I won’t be either. You don’t owe me anything, or-”
“Oh for fuck’s sake, Jared! I want you! I didn’t run off on Nublar to fuck a random guy, I crashed with an old friend, got shitfaced in a bar and thought you overheard me bawling my eyes out that ever since I told you no, back on the Old Home, you didn’t want me anymore.”
“But that’s just stupid,” Jare says outraged. “I’ve always wanted you.”
“And how was I supposed to know that?”
Jared gapes. Jensen raises his eyebrow.
“How is this my fault?” he finally asks.
Jensen just looks at him, unimpressed. “I made it quite clear I’d be interested to try.”
Jared tries to think of one instance and comes up blank. “No, you didn’t.” Because he would’ve noticed. He’d done nothing but watch Jensen. Except when he’d avoided him. Avoided him when the touching had become too much to handle, the smiles too bright to resist.
Jensen looks at him triumphantly and suddenly Jared is mad. This is not his fault, dammit.
“You were the one who didn’t want me,” he says and pulls Jensen in, wrapping his hands around Jensen's wrists and pressing him against the stone. “You abandoned me for the Academy.”
“Your plan was insane,” Jensen says but leans in to meet Jared’s kiss.
“My plan was genius,” Jared says, but he’s already kissing Jensen, because fuck, he can. “My plan was fantastic and you didn’t believe in it.”
Believe in me, is what he really means.
Jensen’s kissing him back and there’s a desperate and impatient edge to it.
“I was so young, Jared. I was afraid.” Jensen’s hands dig painfully into Jared’s shoulder. “My parents always wanted me to go to the Academy. I couldn’t… It was a mistake, okay? I’ve never regretted anything more. Just, can we get past that?”
Jared thinks they probably need to talk about this some more and maybe he shouldn’t jump into this, but he’s loved Jensen so long and he loves the Jensen of now, the strong man he’s grown into. It’s not really a question.
So he leans in to kiss Jensen again. It’s harsh and rough, too much hunger for finesse, but he doesn’t care. He can touch Jensen, finally, and he wants to drown in him. Jensen pushes back, rubs his body all against Jared, which fuck yeah, but when he tries to move his hands, Jared tightens his grip. He will not let Jensen leave. They will stay right fucking here and kiss until they lose all the feeling in their lips, until he can’t take it anymore, and the friction of Jensen’s erection against his own, not enough through all their clothes, drives them insane.
Jensen tries to move his arms again, bites into Jared’s bottom lip.
“Clothes Jared, need to get our fucking clothes off.”
So Jensen might have a point. But when Jared lets go and Jensen reaches down, rips his buttons open and grips Jared’s dick, there’s no more time for undressing.
Jared moans, head falling forward on Jensen’s shoulder and he shoves his hand roughly down Jensen’s jeans. He feels the buttons pop and then Jensen grips his ass, pulling their groins together and Jared wraps his hand around both their dicks. He just needs the friction, needs the heat, he’s already teetering on the edge, Jensen’s mouth and voice and body too much.
Jensen’s hot breath is fanning over his skin, Jensen's fingers are digging into his ass, and Jared bites down into Jensen’s shoulder when they both come all over his fist.
“Fuck.” Jensen’s voice is low and soft and so fucked out it does things to Jared.
“How much time do you think we have before they come back?” His own voice isn’t doing much better.
Jensen looks up at him, eyes heavy lidded and lips red and swollen. Jared wants more.
“You know Chad,” Jensen says. “Not before tomorrow.”
Jared pulls Jensen’s shirt off.
Technically, they could take their time. They have time, after all. But as soon as the shirts are off, the franticness returns. They explore their bodies like they can’t wait one more second to touch everywhere. They get completely naked, the ground rough under their bare feet and they don’t give a shit.
Jared turns Jensen around and gets his mouth all over his body. He’s just as beautiful as he knew he’d be. The sounds Jensen makes only spur him on, all the low moans and half bitten off gasps every time Jared drags his teeth over Jensen’s pale skin.
When Jared sinks to his knees, putting his hands on Jensen’s ass, Jensen shamelessly pushes back.
“Yeah. Need to get me wet, need you to fuck me. C’mon, Jared, haven’t been thinking of anything but you, fucking pathetic, couldn't even fantasize about anything else than your dick and your tongue.”
Jared obliges and buries his face in Jensen’s ass.
“Fuck, that’s, yeah. More!”
Usually Jared is the one who never shuts up. Now it’s Jensen running his mouth at Jared and the only thing keeping him from getting up and burying his aching dick in Jensen’s ass is wanting to hear him fall apart.
He continues to lick Jensen, getting a finger into him next to his tongue, and fuck, he’s hot and tight and perfect and he can’t wait anymore. Jared stumbles to his feet, looking frantically around for where Chad threw the lube.
“Yes, yes, c’mon,” Jensen pants out, reaching back and getting a fistful of Jared’s hair. “Not gonna break, fuck me already.”
“Yes, just gimme a fucking moment, we need-” there it is, lying in the dirt only a few feet from them.
Jensen sees it too and lets him go, so Jared can go pick it up. Jensen’s pushing his ass out for him as soon as Jared’s back and he almost drops the lube in his hurry to slick himself up.
Jensen’s so beautiful like this, all string curved back, shoulder muscles and biceps straining where he’s pushed himself off the wall in anticipation. Jared grips his hips and digs his fingers in, wants to leave marks dammit, and then he presses his dick against Jensen's hole.
“Don’t tease,” Jensen presses out and really, Jared couldn’t even if he wanted to.
He bottoms out with one long stroke and if he hadn’t gotten off ten minutes ago, he probably would’ve come on the spot. Jensen’s hot and tight and perfect. The pressure on Jared’s dick is almost too much, almost, but not enough by a mile, so he pulls back before snapping his hips forward again.
Jensen’s breath leaves him in a punched-out moan and the muscles in his back tense under his skin, as he presses back against Jared.
“So fucking beautiful. You’re so perfect, so perfect.” Jared realizes he’s talking, but he can’t stop. His filter is gone and everything he kept inside since Jensen joined the Ardnek comes tumbling out.
While he fucks Jensen as deep as he can, he tells him how beautiful he is, how strong and how perfect, how good he feels and how Jared never wants to stop doing this.
Jensen says yes to all off it, taking Jared deeper and deeper, arching his back and clenching his muscles around him. Jared wants to feel Jensen tense and shudder, come with Jared buried deep inside him, so he reaches around to jerk Jensen off.
“Yes, please, fuck. Jared, fuck, your hands!”
Jensen’s panting, sweat running down his spine and Jared leans forward to lick it up. The salty taste does nothing to disperse the growing tension in his body, the feeling of being strung too tight, of needing to let go.
“C’mon, Jared,” Jensen pants. “Want you to come. So close, want you to come with me.”
It’s the last thing he needs to fall over the edge, his whole body tightening up and heat exploding through his lower body. Jensen’s right there with him, moaning and shuddering, before he slumps forward against the wall.
Jared has enough presence of mind to lower them both to the ground, until he’s lying on the hard sand, Jensen a heavy weight on his chest. He doesn’t mind. Something sharp is digging into his spine and the ground is too cold, but Jensen’s slotting his leg between Jared’s thighs, brushing up against Jared’s balls, so he doesn’t mind that either.
Slowly, he runs his hand down Jensen’s back, cups his ass before sliding his finger into Jensen’s crack, wet with come and lube. Jensen hums and pushes his ass out and Jared takes it for the invitation it is, sliding a finger inside.
“Gonna be sore tomorrow,” Jensen mumbles.
Jared hums, pulls his finger out and soothingly rubs over Jensen’s hole. “Sorry. Just don’t think I can ever stop touching you.”
Jensen makes a pleased sounds and presses a kiss to the hollow of Jared’s throat, lingering to lick at the skin and then gives a little bite.
“You’re seriously overestimating my refractory period,” Jared groans. “You gotta give me a few minutes here.”
Jensen snorts. “Did you not just hear me talking about the state of my poor ass?”
“Sure,” Jared says, “but mine is still perfectly fine.”
Jensen stills, then he trails his hand around Jared’s hip and Jared pulls up his leg to give him access. Jensen squeezes his ass and bites into shoulder. “It is indeed very fine.”
“What are you gonna do about that then?” Jared asks.
Jensen scoots up and kisses him, long and hard. “I have a few ideas.”
The next morning, when the Ardnek breaks through the cloud cover, Jensen starts looking around for their clothes. Jared just pulls him back on top of him, hand on his ass and mouth on his neck.
“Leave them. Chad deserves some payback for leaving us out here.”
Jensen grins and kisses him. “I thought you were gonna thank him?”
“Who says I can't do both?”
Jensen laughs into Jared’s collar bone which is drowned out first by the Ardnek landing and then by Chad shrieking.
“If we ever get divorced,” Jensen says, “you can keep that one.”