Let's Make The Most Of This Beautiful Day

by SharpestScalpel

Summary:

"From the backs and fronts, we are elephants all day long"

Erik's life makes no sense to him.

Mr. Xavier's Neighborhood - teaching kids to be proud of their mutations thanks to their sponsors and viewers like you! And viewers like Erik Lensherr, who possibly maybe has an inappropriate crush on his children's favorite television personality. Songs, puppets, American literature, and geek references abound.

Work In Progress

Notes:

http://xmen-firstkink.livejournal.com/5215.html?thread=6283615#t6283615

Someone on the last page prompted a Sesame Street crossover and I was hit with the idea that Charles would actually perfect to do MISTER XAVIER'S NEIGHBORHOOD. Some comments on the last page:

He's even got the cardigans already! Perfection! and,

Oh, that's perfect! I can just hear him singing "Who are the people in your neighborhood? (Statistically speaking, some of them are likely mutants!)"
Hank could be a regular visitor, and people on set would be amazed at his commitment to staying in character/costume.

For more inspiration: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FaYR5lwzomE

Would prefer gen but feel free to work Charles/Erik into this somehow. :D

Mr. Xavier was pretending he was an elephant.

Somewhere along the line, Erik had made a poor life choice. The twins weren't it. His job wasn't it (though, really, that was sometimes debatable). Even Moira probably wasn't it. But still, he was sitting on the couch with his delighted children and lusting after a man wearing a towel on his head as ears and singing into a length of tubing that was supposed to be a trunk.

There was something wrong with him. He might need to go back to therapy.

"You can tell at once.... We are elephants.... we are elephants big and strong...."

And who kept towels in their living room anyway? Other than people who... had sex in their living rooms.

"From the backs and fronts.... We are elephants.... We are elephants all day long...."

How long had it been since he'd had sex with another person? Because sex with himself didn't count. He did that all the time. Not all the time. At appropriate intervals. That sounded better. But it had obviously been too long since he'd invited another person to the proverbial party in his pants.

Oh, yeah, that cinched it. He was never getting laid again.

Wanda gasped and Erik focused on the screen again; Mr. Xavier was still dressed up in his elephant rig and now there was a mutant child with an actual trunk. It was pretty, and the easy way Mr. Xavier had with the child was actually quite sweet.

"Daddy?" Wanda poked him in the side. Her fingers were small so it hurt more - greater force exerted over a smaller area or something. He was a lit major, not a physicist.

"What's up, darling?" Erik cleared his throat (and his mind of any inappropriate thoughts regarding one Mr. Xavier because, seriously, it was getting to be ridiculous).

"Play elephants with us."

Pietro nodded, too.

It was good that he'd lost all of his dignity during his undergrad years. Since he didn't have any dignity, he didn't have to be embarrassed at all about how quickly he caved and went to look for towels.

Because he didn't have any reason to keep towels in the living room, thank you very much, Mr. Xavier.

Unfortunately.

Series this work belongs to:

• « Part 3 of the Mr. Xavier's Neighborhood series »