Leonard McCoy checked his instruments one final time before relaying the results of his findings.
"You're kidding right?"
McCoy shook his head. "No, Jim I'm not."
James T Kirk, captain of the federation starship Enterprise, sat up on the biobed and glared hard at his CMO. "So basically, what you are telling me is," he paused to take a deep breath in an attempt to control his panic at the implication of Bones' diagnosis. "You are telling me that I'm having CRAMPS?"
"Don't yell at me, Jim, it's not my fault. You knew that this could happen and you were given the option of having the damn thing removed when you were fifteen. "
"Precisely. I was fifteen, Bones. I was more concerned with other parts of my body at the time. Besides, I was informed that it would probably stay dormant and I didn't want to be messed around with unless it was medically necessary."
"See that's the thing, Jim, you were informed that it would probably stay dormant. Not will, but probably. Do you understand what that means, genius?"
"Okay, okay. I'm sorry. I know it's not your fault, but cramps, Bones. Cramps!"
McCoy suppressed a smile. “The ovulation is the cause of the severe pain you have been experiencing, Jim and as you are very obviously a man, there isn't an opening for you to expel the...”
Jim held up a hand. “Bones, stop right there. I get the picture okay?”
McCoy nodded sympathetically. "Don't worry, I can suppress the symptoms with a simple hypo so you won't need to go through the usual monthly menstrual cycle." He stepped closer to his friend. "I won't pretend to understand what happened down on that planet, Jim, but for whatever reason your once dormant reproductive organs are now fully functional and from what I can tell from your scans, they will continue to be so until they are either removed or..."
“Or what?” Jim asked nervously.
“Or," he continued, "you can always make use of them and have several little Jim's – or Spock's for that matter." McCoy snickered at the horrified look upon his best friends' face – a look that turned from horrified to contemplative. "Oh, no. I was kidding, Jim. I didn't mean for you to actually consider it."
Jim smiled ruefully and ran a hand through his hair. "Bones, this is a hell of lot to take in. I mean, I'm freaking out a little - well a lot actually, but when Spock and I committed to each other the possibility of having our own children wasn't even an option. Spock isn't even sure he can father children. He assumed he was infertile so the question of kids never really came up, but can you imagine what this would mean to him and the remaining Vulcan's? I'm not sure I ever wanted kids before this crazy shit happened, but I need to run this by Spock. I can't take away his only possible chance of reproducing."
"You must have hit your head harder than I thought while you were down there? I must have missed something on my scans." McCoy picked up his tricorder and waved it over his friend. "Are you the real Jim Kirk? I'm not so sure."
"Very funny, Bones. This is serious."
"Damn right it's serious and it's not a decision you can make on a whim. This is a huge risk, Jim. Even if Spock is fertile, and even if we can successfully impregnate you..."
Jim screwed up his face in disgust at Bones' choice of words.
"Infant!" the doctor admonished. "As I was saying, even if we can successfully impregnate you, there is no telling how it will affect you. It could be dangerous, Jim."
The captain stood up and pulled on his uniform tunic and sighed deeply. He appeared to have the weight of the world upon his shoulders.
"Jim, you don't have to decide anything now. Discuss it with Spock and if he agrees we can go ahead and do some tests to determine whether he is fertile, then we can go from there. You need to discuss this at length. I need to do extensive tests on you and I'd like you to undergo some counselling. Your whole life will change, Jim and your position as captain of the Enterprise could be compromised. I'm not going to consider carrying out the procedure until we have covered all the bases. OK?"
"Okay, Bones." Jim nodded. "I'll talk to Spock and let you know what we decide."
As he was about to leave the med bay, Jim was stopped by a gentle hand on his arm. "Whatever you decide to do, Jim, I'll support you 100% you know that, but please, please don't let yourself be pressured into this. It's your body and if you decide it's just too much, we don't have to go any further."
"Thanks, Bones. I know."