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Cloudy With A Chance Of Sex Pollen

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The old Batman didn’t like metas in his city. The new Batman was a little more lenient, especially when it came to current and former Teen Titans. Actually, Dick had been dropping hints that maybe Kon, Bart and Cassie could stop by a little more often. You didn’t have to be the World’s Greatest Detective to figure out that Dick was worried about his little brother. Red Robin wasn’t as withdrawn as he had been before Bruce returned, but he was still being Broody McBatAngst and Kon had no problem assuring Dick that he’ll do the best friend thing and keep an eye on Tim.

Kon spotted a street vendor selling inflatable Batman toys and snickered. He flew down, landed discreetly in a nearby alley and bought one of them, a scowly blue and yellow caricature of the city’s guardian which dangled from a white plastic stick. He considered the Superman and Wonder Woman versions and made a mental note to stop by later, if he had the time.

He found Red Robin standing on a rooftop, overlooking the city, hands on his hips and cape fluttering out behind him. Kon hovered behind his friend and held the small Batman out next to Red Robin. “Look sharp, little buddy. We’ve got a 10-89 at 10:49. Excecute plan four-eighty-one-aught-bee-squiggle when I give you the - “ Tim lifted his staff and Kon saw a blade pop out of it just before it tore through the doll’s thin vinyl guts. The Batman deflated and hung off the plastic stick, limp and empty. “Hey!”

“Did you want something?” Tim asked.

“You to have a sense of humor,” Kon said.  He examined the remains of the toy and sighed. “You would have had better luck in a temporal paradox,” he told it.

“Now isn’t a good time,” Tim said. Something in his tone made Kon look at him and really pay attention. Tim’s heartbeat raced and he was flushed under the cowl.

“Tim? You okay?”

Tim flicked something on his staff and the blade disappeared again. “I’m fine.”

“Not according to your heartbeat,” Kon said. “And don’t give me any privacy crap, bat-boy. I can hear it from here without even trying.”

Tim waved a hand. “I had an encounter with Poison Ivy a bit ago. There may be some physiological side effects, but I’m immunized against her toxins. It’s nothing to worry about.”

“What if she changed up her formula?” Kon asked.

Tim gave him an oh please look. “We do stay on top of these things.”

Kon heard Tim’s heartbeat jump a little. “Still, maybe it’s time to call it a night. Sleep it off.”

“I don’t-” Tim stopped, and Kon saw him tilt his head just a tiny bit, the way he always did when he got a call on his comm. “Red Robin,” he said, not talking to Kon. “Yes, he’s here.” Tim gave Kon a sideways glance. “It’s fine, though, I can finish my patrol... yeah, things are light now, but... No, you don’t get to give me those kind of orders anymore! … all right, fine, but you don’t get to bug me about it for a month... One month, or no deal... Fine. See you tomorrow.”

Kon lifted an eyebrow and waited.

Tim rolled his eyes. “Batman thinks I should take time off and spend some time with you.”

Nightwing-Batman, Kon decided, was a much better Batman than the older version. “Guess you’re outvoted. C’mon. I’ll fly you home.”

They landed on the roof of the old movie theater Tim had remodeled. Tim was flushed and breathing heavily. “Maybe you should see a doctor,” Kon said.

“I’ll be fine,” Tim said. But his hands shook slightly as he unlocked the rooftop door.

Tim went into his bedroom to change while Kon flipped through their video game options. Kon slipped a disk into the console and sprawled on the couch with the controller. He heard the door to the bedroom open and said, “Have you done the co-op on -” He turned to look at Tim and his jaw dropped. “Uh, I think you forgot pants.”

Tim was only wearing boxers and a white t-shirt. “It’s really warm in here,” he said distractedly.

“No,” Kon said carefully. “You’re running a fever.”

Tim sat down next to Kon on the couch, close enough that Kon could smell the faint scent of sweat and Kevlar that still clung to his body, even after a quick clean-up. “I’m fine,” Tim said again. He licked his lips and ran a hand up Kon’s left thigh.

Kon froze. Well, most of him froze. The remaining bit rose to attention. “Tim,” he said in a strangled voice, “I think Ivy’s stuff might be affecting you.”

“I told you, I’m immune,” Tim said. “You have very nice thighs,” he said. He slid a hand across Kon’s lap and caressed his right thigh. “I’ve been wanting to see if they felt as good as they look and I think I can conclusively say they feel even better.”

“Uh, thanks,” Kon said, his mouth dry. “I... yours are very nice, too.”

Probably the wrong thing to say. Tim smiled and in one swift move, he straddled Kon. “I think about you,” he whispered in Kon’s ear. Kon could feel Tim’s erection pressing against his own through the fabric of their clothes, could feel Tim’s warm breath against his neck. “I want to kiss you. I want to put my mouth all over you.”

With a very great effort of will, Kon lifted Tim off of him and stood up. “This isn’t you,” he said, his own breathing heavy now, his own heart racing.

Tim slipped off the couch and knelt in front of Kon, looking up with big blue eyes and moist lips. Kon reached out to touch Tim’s hair, but snatched back his hand before he made contact.  Yeah, Tim was really freaking hot and yeah, okay, maybe he’d fantasized about his best friend a few times, but no way was it a coincidence that Tim suddenly decided to pull a big seduction act on the same night he’d been dosed by Poison Ivy. “It’s me,” Tim whispered. His hands touched Kon’s belt and Kon jumped back.

“Maybe we should slow down a bit,” Kon suggested.

Tim eyed him thoughtfully, then nodded and stood up. He put a hand on either side of Kon’s face and kissed him. Kon’s hands slipped around Tim’s waist of their own volition. Kon had always known Tim to be intense and focused, sometimes to a fault, but he had never been the center of that focus before. Tim’s lips and tongue met his and Kon had known Tim kept his emotions bottled up under that reserved exterior, but he’d never expected to feel the intensity that Tim poured into this kiss.

Kon groaned into Tim’s mouth and felt his body arch and press against Tim. Tim moaned in response and Kon nearly came just from that sound. He knew what to do, now. Tim hadn’t left him much of a choice.

He grabbed Tim’s ass and lifted him up. Tim wrapped his legs around Kon and Kon groaned again. He carried Tim into the bedroom and laid him down on the bed with Kon on top of him.

“Love you,” Tim whispered. He nibbled just below Kon’s ear and worked his way down to the collarbone.

“I love you, too.” Kon felt around with his TTK. The Red Robin costume lay folded on a chair nearby. Kon pulled a couple of zip strips from one of the pouches.  Still kissing Tim, he lifted the other boy’s arms over his head until his wrists lay next to the headboard. Then he zip-tied Tim’s wrists to the bed.

Tim’s eyes opened and he gave Kon a puzzled, hurt look that jabbed Kon in the heart. “What are you doing?”

“Taking care of you,” Kon said. He planted a soft kiss on Tim’s forehead. “I’m not doing anything you’ll regret tomorrow.”

“I won’t,” Tim pleaded. He tried to run a foot up between Kon’s thighs, but Kon backed away. “Please, Kon, I need you!”

Kon walked into the kitchen and stuck his head under the cold water faucet. Wasn’t as good as a cold shower, but it’d have to do. He grabbed a towel and wiped off his face, then picked up his phone and called Batman. He had never been more grateful that Bruce wasn’t in Gotham. Explaining the situation to Nightwing-Batman was bad enough.

Dick promised to be right over with their strongest antidote. Kon ended the call with relief and just the slightest twinge of regret. This would be over soon.

“You called Dick.”

Kon whirled around to find Tim standing in the doorway of the kitchen. Stupid Robin tricks, he thought with a sigh. He should’ve tracked down the industrial handcuffs Tim sometimes carried. Those would’ve held him a bit longer.

“I don’t mind,” Tim said. He strode over to Kon and whispered in his ear. Kon could feel the heat radiating from his skin. “I used to fantasize about Nightwing.”

“Uh...” Kon said, not sure what to do with that information.

“But now it’s you I think about,” Tim said. “Still, if you want a threesome, I won’t say no.” He slid a hand inside Kon’s waistband and worked it downward.

“No, that’s not- I didn’t- stop, Tim!”

Tim stopped, holding his hand very still. Kon gritted his teeth. “Remove your hand, please?” Tim did, slowly. Kon leaned back against the sink and dug his fingers into the edge of the marble. He heard something crack behind him.

“Okay,” Tim said, his breathing very heavy, now. “We can wait for Dick.”

“We’re not-” and Kon gave up. “Okay, yeah, don’t want to start without him.”

“Maybe we could start a little,” Tim suggested. Kon found his arms full of Tim again and really, it was just a kiss, what was the harm?

And then Tim pulled away and whispered, “Kon.” He frowned and put a hand to his forehead. “Kon, I don’t think -” and then he convulsed in Kon’s arms and went limp.

“TIM!” Kon screamed. He lowered Tim gently to the floor, trying to listen for a heartbeat, but his own heart was pounding so hard he couldn’t hear anything else. Kon grabbed Tim’s wrist and tried to see if his chest was moving, but all he could see was Tim pale and unconscious, sprawled across blue marble tile. After a long, horrible moment of fumbling, he found Tim’s pulse, weak, but steady.

A black shadow appeared behind him.

“He passed out,” Kon said. “I’m sorry, I should’ve called you sooner, but he said he was fine, oh, God, please let him be okay.”

Nightw- Batman knelt next to his brother. “Hey, Timmy,” he said softly. “We’re going to take care of you, okay?” He drew a syringe from a belt pouch and injected the contents into Tim’s upper arm. A few minutes later, the color returned to Tim’s face.

“Tim?” Kon asked. The boy mumbled something incoherent and didn’t open his eyes.

Dick checked Tim’s eyes with a small penlight, listened to his breathing and pricked his finger for a blood test with a kit from another pouch. “He’s okay,” he said finally.

Kon let out a long breath he hadn’t realized he was holding.

Dick scooped Tim up in his arms and carried him to his bed. He tucked Tim in carefully. “Can you stay with him?” he asked Kon.

“Yeah. Of course,” Kon said. “What do I need to do?”

“Just be here for him,” Dick said. “There’s a risk of delirium with this formula. If he has nightmares, I don’t want him to be alone.”

Kon nodded, guilt tightening in his stomach. Should’ve gotten help sooner. Dick noticed his expression and put one hand on Kon’s shoulder.

“You did exactly right,” Batman told him. “Thank you for looking after him.”

“Anytime,” Kon promised.

Batman smiled at him and it was just weird to see that expression with that cowl. “Thank you.”  He left as swiftly and quietly as he’d arrived.

Kon pulled a chair up beside Tim’s bed, determined to keep watch all night. But Tim’s sleep appeared undisturbed and Kon finally dozed off.

Tim was already up when he woke. Kon stumbled out to the kitchen to find Tim fully dressed and cooking breakfast. “Feeling better?” Kon asked carefully.

Tim’s entire face flushed red and he couldn’t meet Kon’s eyes. “I’m sorry about last night. Can we please pretend it never, ever happened?”

Kon nodded. He watched Tim lift the poached eggs from the pan. “Yeah, of course. If I can just say one thing first? Before we voluntarily retcon it from our brains?”

Tim paused, swallowed, and nodded.

“I didn’t mind it so much,” Kon said. “If you’d been willing, I wouldn’t have stopped you.” Tim looked at him, wide-eyed in surprise. Kon blushed. “Okay, never mind, forget I said anything.”

“I was drugged,” Tim said after a moment. “But I wasn’t exactly unwilling.”

Kon looked at Tim, then, and Tim met his eyes and held the gaze. Kon walked over to Tim, touched his chin and leaned in to kiss him. It was light, tentative, with none of the urgency of the previous night. And yet the passion was there, restrained, but still there underneath.

“Are you busy tonight?” Tim asked. “You could come over, we could figure stuff out?”

Kon nodded. “I’ll be here.” And since things seemed to be close to okay now, he couldn’t resist a little jab. “Should I ask Dick to join us?”

Tim blushed even redder. Even the tips of his ears attained a nice glow. “Never bring that up again, please? That was a stupid kid crush. I haven’t thought about it in years.”

“It’s our secret,” Kon grinned.

* * *