The damp air was heavy up at the top of the mountain. And even if both women were well-trained and in good stamina, they both needed to breathe deeply once they reached the plain green that marked the mountain peak. It was a beautiful place to be. They were able to oversee a huge part of the mountain range where Nanda Parbat was located and almost everything they could see was bathed in warm sunlight. It truly was a mystical place and surely one of a kind.
Chapter 1: About the dark days
Nyssa sat down at her favorite place. The grass was soft beneath her palms and the sun shone through the misty air warming her face. The other woman stood a few steps away and marveled at the view. All the time it had been dark around her and here, only a three-hour mountain walk from where she’d been found near the shore, was one of the most beautiful places on planet earth, she was sure about this. The two women kept silent, both wrapped in their own thoughts.
Nyssa recently heard someone saying that the clearest eyes are usually those which have seen too much. In Sara’s case, she was sure about that. Her topaz eyes had seen a lot of things which such a beautiful being should never even get a glimpse of. So many people hurt her, so many scars were left on her and there would be even more in a few weeks, Nyssa knew about that for sure. They had trained Sara’s condition, coordination and had done some exercises to strengthen her muscles and Sara’s fitness improved from day to day. That she was already able to climb this mountain was a pretty good sign of how soon she would get in touch with weapons, combat and lessons about how to kill. She had already spent a lot of time in the darkness and Nyssa sighed when thinking about the upcoming events being probably even darker for the handsome blonde.
Sara looked at the other woman. Sighing was not typical for her - Sara had learned that in the last two months. Nyssa actually wasn’t the talkative kind of woman at all. And sounds were included in that case. Nyssa was pragmatic. She was clear and if there was nothing to say, she’d just keep quiet. Sighing in this particular instance was not a good omen. “What’s bothering you?”, Sara asked, breaking the silence. Their eyes met and Sara once again was bound by the intensity of the beautiful assassin’s look. When Nyssa blinked Sara swallowed hard, trying to calm down her heartbeat. “I can see the darkness coming and I am not happy about you being surrounded by it.” Nyssa’s answer was as honest as ever. She always meant what she said. Sara had made this experience two weeks after Nyssa had found and saved her.
The first time she had ever heard Nyssa’s voice it was making a promise. Sara most of the time had been alone in Nyssa’s room, where the woman had adjusted a bed for her to stay until she had recovered from either almost starving or drowning. They never talked. But when Sara needed something, Nyssa was there. It was as if she could read her and knew exactly what she required before Sara could ask for it. One day, Sara woke up by someone being hunched over her bed, when this someone suddenly pressed his hand on her mouth preventing her from making any noise. She could still hear his voice in her head, echoing, again and again. “You make a noise - I kill you. You try to fight – I kill you. You try to escape – I kill you. Understand?” She couldn’t breathe; the leather glove of the stranger covered her mouth and nose. Sara squirmed and tried to get free of his hand but he’d not let go. She could feel him getting on top of her, her vision blurred by tears and despair, reliving flashbacks of the island and the freighter, almost fainting because of the lack of oxygen. Suddenly, his weight was gone and Sara gasped for air, struggling against her fear, sobbing and not sure about what had just happened to her. She realized someone was standing next to her bed and was relieved when she recognized Nyssa al Ghul. The beautiful woman held a blood-stained knife in her hand. Sara stared at her as if she’d seen a ghost. “No woman should ever suffer at the hands of men. I will not let anything like this happen to you again. I promise to protect you.”
“Sara.” Nyssa looked caring, contracting her perfect eyebrows. “I did not mean to scare you.” The blonde shuddered, shaking her head being very aware of the soft touch of Nyssa’s hand on hers. “No, no… it’s fine. I was just thinking about the first time I heard your voice. Uh, I didn’t mean that your voice scared me but, err…” Nyssa nodded. She knew what Sara wanted to say. Reassuring, she gave Sara’s hand a slight squeeze. There was this deep, intense look again. A little frightened, but yet so deep Nyssa sometimes thought she might actually drown in its depths. Not that she would mind. She could hardly think of a place where something might be more beautiful than those clear, ocean blue eyes, so stunningly perfect it almost hurt Nyssa to give in to their look.
Chapter 2: Tension
Sara felt this familiar tension in her stomach – neither being able to fight it nor to ignore it. There was something about the other woman that made her feel comfortable and nervous at the same time, leaving her not exactly sure where to sort this feeling. She had never had romantic feelings for a woman before, so why should this change? But she had neither had this kind of feelings for any man. She’d had a crush on Oliver. And there had been another guy on college who caught her eye. But this was a complete different thing. Like everything else about Nyssa it was pure and yet it left Sara in a daze. What was she supposed to do with this? She felt new to this, inexperienced and the fact that she didn’t know what she actually dealt with, didn’t make her feel more self-confident. Even if these were romantic feelings and even if she was going to give up resistance, what if Nyssa’s feelings were totally different? And even if they were not - this was Nyssa al Ghul, daughter of Ra’s al Ghul and ‘Heir to the Demon’. She could not just start a relationship with this woman, who was already something like the deputy leader of The League and one day would actually be leader. She had to admit that even though she had never met Ra’s al Ghul face to face, she was scared about him. She felt like she would actually rather not want to meet him in person. She’d met Nyssa. And she definitely did not want to have her as her enemy. And since Ra’s was probably even more protective than Nyssa, this was actually a quite reasonable explanation of why she was scared when thinking about going on dates with his daughter. Sara was stuck with that ‘going on dates’ -thought. How did she get into this? Nyssa was standing right in front of her, so close that even though their bodies did not touch she could feel the heat radiating from this cryptic but gorgeous woman. Looking into her eyes, just watching her own reflection and then being pulled into a look so strong and yet so soft, so deep and so warm, Sara just couldn’t think about anything else but letting go.
Nyssa pulled herself together. The way she felt about Sara was nothing like anything she had ever felt before. Everything in her seemed to drag towards Sara, every part of her was attracted to the other woman. She had actually never had romantic feelings for anyone before. She had never felt attracted to any man, though there definitely were some nice guys around. At least as much as international assassins could be nice guys. Most of the League members were older, only few younger than her but she couldn’t care less. And about women – as The League only consisted of men, there was definitely not much of a chance to fall in love with another woman. She was probably not supposed to feel like this. Until she found Sara on that day she would never forget, she used to be living for The League. She officially started training when she turned eight. But since she was the only kid around and there was no one to play with, she had already been watching other members’ trainings for years. And from her eighth birthday on, all she ever did was running, learning to move perfectly noiseless, sparring, taking archery lessons and training with the bō staff. She had been trained to be an assassin, a cold-blooded killer. Who would actually fall in love with a murderer who was not planning to end her career? Then, with the day she rescued this starving, half-drowned and still unbelievably beautiful woman from the fierce winds and rough hands of the ocean, her life changed. She’d never given much thought to other people. Chances were that one day soon they’d get killed in a fight or committed suicide because they’d done something wrong according to the code. She’d actually been quite alone for the biggest part of her life. Since that was all she’d ever known, she had never really minded. But when she started to care for the blonde she also started realizing how empty her life had been for all those years. And even if Sara actually felt the same about her – Nyssa was Ra’s’ daughter. She didn’t know if The League’s code of honor said something about same-sex relationships. Not that she knew of it. But even if not, Ra’s would not be too happy about his heir having a relationship with another woman. Where should his next heir come from..? Granted, that was a far in the future thing but she was almost one hundred percent sure her father would ask about this. Just why did she always do what she supposed her father would want from her? She needed this woman, no matter what. Once that she’d thought about this need, Nyssa realized how urgent it felt, how much strength she had to find to cover her feelings for the woman in front of her, how much she hated not being able to let her restraint go. This whole thing…. It didn’t feel like a crush or something. This was more. It was pure. And Nyssa felt like being with Sara was somehow essential for survival.
They both stood perfectly still, eyes locked, bathed in golden sunlight surrounded by shimmering air and caught in their feelings. Then, in a small and yet graceful move, Nyssa raised her hand to tenderly lift Sara’s chin, slowly bending down a little until in a soft and delicate touch Nyssa gently pressed her lips against Sara’s.
Chapter 3: Home
Sara felt like her world would collapse every moment. Nyssa’s lips were incredibly soft and that kiss actually felt more like a butterfly having a rest on Sara’s lips. Seconds felt like hours and yet like seconds again, time didn’t mean anything at all. Sara felt a little strange, like she could actually watch the scene from the outside but still feel what the taller woman’s lips did to her. It felt like with this oh so gentle touch Nyssa directly touched Sara’s innermost part, her heart, her soul, her core. Everything that had been dark in the last two years was washed away with this moment, everything that had bound her let her go and it seemed to Sara as if not the sun was bathing her in light but Sara herself was glowing. Warmth spread all over her body, slowly coursing through her veins as she was suddenly able to see and feel all the love Nyssa had to give. The enormous delight threatened to shatter every wall Sara had built to protect her in the last few years. She could not see any possibility to not surrender herself to Nyssa in that moment. But she didn’t mind. Because for the first time since she had set foot on the Queen’s Gambit, Sara felt home.
Nyssa found herself in zero gravity. She felt like with the first moment their lips met, everything else that had mattered before actually lost every importance. She couldn’t feel anything but the other woman’s body standing so close in front of her and yet feeling too far away. Leaning forward to kiss Sara had felt like the most natural thing to do and yet it made her… excited. Nyssa hadn’t even known how excitement should feel - before she got to know Sara. But now, that she could feel the soft warmth of Sara’s breath on her face, the silky smooth skin of her beautiful nose slightly touching Nyssa’s and her oh so sensual lips caressing the very sensitive spots of Nyssa’s, gently nibbling at her bottom lip, she knew about excitement. There was something new to the feeling now. The urgent need she’d felt with every fiber of her body, the need to be with Sara, had actually changed and while she could still feel it everywhere, it was more centered now, focused on one spot somewhere inside of her, just a little beneath her bellybutton.
When they unlinked their lips they stood in those shimmering feelings for another second, slowly realizing they were both lightheaded and a little dazed from all those emotions. Looking into Nyssa’s eyes again, Sara could tell that something had changed. Nyssa’s eyes seemed even darker than they had been before their kiss. Giving her a wry smile she took a step back. For an instant she could see confusion written all over Nyssa’s face. “I did not mean to… Did I expect too much-“. “No, Nyssa, no” Sara shook her head thinking about what she wanted to say. “I just wanted to know if you are alright, because… Something in your look was different. Did I do something wrong?” Nyssa glanced at the blonde’s serious look and her expression smoothened. “There was nothing wrong about it. “ She paused and wondered if she was supposed to say anything else. Noticing Sara’s concern she stated calmly: “I didn’t expect those feelings. They are even more intense than I had known.” Taking a deep breath, she turned away from Sara and towards the mountains, gazing into the distance.
Chapter 4: Close
“Do it again.” Sara said quietly. The taller woman froze for a moment, letting the words sink in, feeling tension clenching her stomach. She was not used to being unsure. She had never been unsure in her whole life. She had never been nervous. This was all very new to her and she wasn’t exactly certain how to handle that. She could feel her heartbeat speeding up a little, slightly shaking her head in confusion. She knew she wanted to kiss Sara again, she knew she wanted to pull the handsome blonde into her arms, she knew, she wanted to feel this aching again. But she didn't know if Sara was aware of how much Nyssa wanted to feel her.
She couldn't help it. "I am not sure..." Sara lifted an eyebrow. “As I said”, Nyssa went on “There was nothing wrong about it.” She paused again, looking at the other woman. “So… what’s wrong about it this time? “, Sara asked, seriously wondering. Nyssa felt like she could explode from all those feelings inside her. How could a single person actually feel all these things at the same time? She decided that she probably should just be quiet and let Sara make her own guesses, which she obviously did. “There is nothing wrong about it.” Their eyes met again. “I think you are scared. Or, if not scared, you are confused. I can see it. And I can feel it, too. What are you so concerned about?” Nyssa again took a deep breath and with an apologetic look, she answered “I am just worried that you have no idea of how much I want to feel you close.”
Sara swallowed hard. Nyssa had lowered her voice at the end of the sentence and that low voice, almost whispering under her breath actually had Sara feel an urge and a force within her and towards Nyssa which longed for physical closeness. She could feel her heart pounding against her chest, strong and ready to speed up with the slightest sign of Nyssa approaching her. She didn’t; which would have to mean that she was actually waiting for Sara to object her latest statement. Sara looked around and again got aware of how actually beautiful it was on top of this mountain and how absolutely gorgeous the other woman looked against the sun. It was the perfect place to be, all romantic for sure. She thought about that kiss again. It had filled her completely, soothed her and made her open up to Nyssa well and truly. She was willing to do anything right now, only to feel Nyssa so close again. What she felt in her heart was true and it was still the purest thing she had ever felt for any other person. And without really thinking about it and without feeling awkward or weak at all, she made eye contact with Nyssa again, whispering: “I love you.”
Chapter 5: Everything
There was nothing - absolutely nothing - that could have hit Nyssa as much as those three words did. They seemed to knock her off her feet, punched her in her stomach with strength and yet so perfectly soft that Nyssa was struggling to find back to her calm expression still feeling like losing the ground under her feet. Paralyzed she watched Sara approaching her, sensing the other woman’s presence with every part of her body, willingly welcoming Sara’s lips with hers as she was gently pulled down into another kiss. This time, it was different. She could feel heat spreading over her body when Sara’s tongue cautiously parted her lips, making contact with her own tongue touching its tip softly. Nyssa followed Sara’s every move, nestling one hand into her blonde hair lightened by sea salt and sun, laying her other hand down at Sara’s lower back and with a firm grip pulling her closer in sensation.
Sara gasped as her heartbeat somersaulted. Opening her eyes wide, pulling away from the kiss she stared into Nyssa’s now almost black eyes, trying to catch her breath. She could feel her blood pulsing through her arteries with pressure and by the look of Nyssa’s eyes she could easily tell that the taller woman was feeling exactly the same.
The air whirred around them and the sun still shone warm, illuminating the scene. Nyssa was left speechless, knowing that if she’d only open her mouth to say something she would probably for the first time of her life break down in tears because of the sheer intensity of her feelings. Luckily, Sara found her tongue first. “I didn’t expect this to be so intense either”, she whispered, her voice husky with desire. Even though Nyssa had never really known how being sexually attracted should feel like, she could clearly see it now in Sara’s eyes and she simply knew that her own eyes looked just the same.
Nobody would ever come searching for them up here, Nyssa caught herself thinking. And thinking about what could actually happen now made her shiver and again, she was nervous. Why did she have to be so nervous when she was with the beautiful blonde? Nyssa was almost angry about her own uncertainty. She used to be so tough, she always knew what she wanted and she liked that she used to think pragmatic. Nothing could ever shake her world because she was always in control and knowing that made her feel secure. She’d never needed anyone to take care of her; she could compete against the best fighters of the world all alone. The knowledge about actually falling for someone and having to surrender troubled her. And for the first time since the assassin saved her it was Sara calming Nyssa. She let her hands wander up to Nyssa’s perfectly smooth lips, carefully touching them and making the taller woman smile a little. “I won’t hurt you.” And Nyssa knew for sure that there was not a single person in the world who she could trust more, looking into those clear blue eyes so full of love and protection, Nyssa suddenly knew without a doubt she was ready to hand her heart over to the blonde.
Sara liked it to actually be the stronger one of them for once. She loved the trusting way Nyssa gave up her resistance and by no means Sara would let her down or violate the position Nyssa had actually granted her. But while on the one hand she felt as protective as never before right now, she was on the other hand caught in her own desire. She knew what she wanted now and that it was Nyssa al Ghul she wanted it from didn’t scare her anymore. Nothing had ever felt more comfortable to her than her face being held in Nyssa’s hands, softly being kissed by her. And whatever kind of sexual experiences Sara had made in her life, she knew that without a doubt this moment would be locked in her heart until the end of her life, maybe even making her forget about Lian Yu and the Amazo. She could think of no one else she would want to touch her like this. And as she felt Nyssa’s uncertainty she realized that this wonderful woman had absolutely no experience in this kind of proximity. Sara smiled as warm and loving as she was able to, reassuring the otherwise so fearless woman. Whispering sweet sounds in her ear Sara laid Nyssa down on the soft green ground.
They both felt like the world stood still and nothing else mattered. As the sunshine was warm, neither of them felt cold when under kisses they undressed each other up to their underwear, attentive to detect every change of emotions on the other one’s face.
All Sara could think of was Nyssa. Nyssa’s eyes, Nyssa’s body, Nyssa’s skin under her hands, Nyssa. Every part of the assassin’s body was perfectly trained, her skin was as soft as it could possibly be and even though Sara was a little frightened about all the scars on Nyssa’s body, she thought she had never seen a woman more beautiful and more attractive. Sara bent down, slowly starting to kiss Nyssa’s neck, then nibbling softly at her earlobe, closely listening to the other woman’s breathing. She could feel gentle hands stroking down her spine causing an unbelievable sensation. She sat up and pulled Nyssa into an upright position, now kind of kneeling on her lap. Nyssa’s hands slowly went over Sara’s sensitive skin, caressing her clavicles, neck and arms, then sliding the straps of Sara’s bra aside, planting kisses on the marks. Sara looked down at Nyssa, leaning down and kissing her sensual lips. She could clearly feel their bodies pressed against each other. Slowly moving her hand down Nyssa’s back, she opened the clasp of her plain black bra, removing it with a nervous humming in her guts, her heartbeat speeding up even more.
Nyssa laid back into the grass, pulling Sara on top of her again. She could feel the blonde being nervous now, drawing her in for a kiss starting softly and growing in passion. She felt like her body was yearning for Sara’s soothing hands to cover her, touch every part of her skin, pull her under the surface and take her breath away. She gasped, when Sara started to move her hips against hers, placing one leg between Nyssa’s thighs and exerting pressure on her pubis.
Encouraged by Nyssa actually gasping, Sara let her hands explore Nyssa’s skin, stroking her abs, gently raising the pressure, then let her thumbs press down on Nyssa’s ribs, eventually causing her to moan. She spread kisses all over her skin, timidly covering Nyssa’s perfect breasts with both her hands, again only gently raising the pressure. Her fingertips drew circles around Nyssa’s dark nipples as Sara marveled at them hardening under her touch. She raised her gaze just to find Nyssa watching her, biting her lip. With a graceful move Nyssa pulled Sara up into a passionate kiss causing her to lose orientation and when Nyssa’s lips let hers go she found herself looking at the lovely assassin from below as Nyssa had just rolled over, now sitting on top of the blonde. Smirking she bent down, whispering “I think it’s even better to be in charge here…” in Sara’s ear, gently letting her hot breath flow into Sara’s neck, making her shiver. She placed her palms next to Sara’s body, pushing herself up and slowly lowering until her lips met Sara’s lower abdomen so that Sara winced by the sudden touch. She repeated this move, each time drawing nearer to Sara’s most sensitive spot. Nyssa could feel Sara’s temperature rising, the heat radiating from between her legs. Just before kissing Sara where she wanted to feel Nyssa so badly, Nyssa lifted herself, shifted her weight on her left arm now having her right hand free to touch the blonde’s body. Sara groaned in disapproval as she realized Nyssa’s lips were actually gone. The taller woman softly stroke Sara’s heated skin, letting her fingertips move over Sara’s inner thighs teasingly slow. Under her fingers, Nyssa could feel goose bumps erupting over Sara’s skin. Only seeing the other woman in this state, lying almost bare underneath her, eyes shut in pleasure, shivering from Nyssa’s touch, actually turned her on in a way she never thought she would be able to feel. Feeling Sara’s hands on her skin had already felt... incredibly good. But knowing she was the one who actually made Sara move like this, impatiently winding and waiting for Nyssa to touch her again was just simply indescribable.
“Nyssa!” Hearing Sara pant her name almost drove Nyssa out of her mind. “Don’t. Don’t stop now. Please. Touch – touch me.”
And following Sara’s order, Nyssa let her instincts take control over her moves, taking off the rest of their clothes, joining Sara’s delicious naked body, discovering the purest sensation and most overwhelming way to connect their heartbeats and by reaching the peak finally connecting their souls.
Later, they were curled together on the ground, inhaling each other’s scent and not willing to let go of the warmth of the other one’s body, slightly glistening with sweat and still bathed in golden light. Soaking in the moment, their fingers interlocked, Nyssa finally found the right words to say.
“I love you, too, little bird.”