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Hors d'Ouevres

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~~~Written 8/21/13~~~
Prompt:  YamaSai; Sai's got it in his mind that he has to top to be considered a man. Yamato ends up leading Sai through it from the bottom.
"Sai, what a man does in his bedroom--what...position, you take, when we have sex--it has nothing to do with your masculinity or your worth as a man, as anything."  He was very careful to express only patience, to not let his irritation color his tone, but if he ever found out who'd put that notion in Sai's head, they'd be getting intimately acquainted with the interior of a tree.

"Oh."  Sai's brow furrowed slightly in a thoughtful frown.

Yamato exhaled heavily through his nose and settled a warm hand on Sai's shoulder.  "I would be glad to switch, whenever you like.  I...would enjoy doing that, for you."  He hadn't realized how much truth was in that statement until he said it.  "But let's do it because you want to, not because some narrow-minded idiot out there thinks it's emasculating to bottom."

"Alright," Sai agreed, straightening up.  "Then, I would like to 'switch', because I am...curious.  I enjoy the way it feels to have you inside of me, but I want to know what it feels like to be inside you as well.  Will you teach me how to do it?"

Yamato couldn't help breaking into a brilliant smile.  "Of course."  He dipped down to kiss Sai soundly on the mouth, still smiling.  "I'll teach you anything you want to know."

Prompt:  Gai, Kakashi - Sand
Buried on the beach with only his head free, Gai contemplated this latest challenge with his rival and conceded that perhaps he had chosen rashly.  Whoever stayed buried longest would be declared the victor, but Gai was already twitching, restless, dissatisfied with remaining uselessly still for so long; there was sand in his briefs and no respite from the glaring sun in his eyes and he would have taken heart from the idea that Kakashi was equally uncomfortable, had he not been almost positive that his Rival was sound asleep beneath his own mound of sand two meters away.

Prompt:  Yamato - Sunscreen
He knew it was a bad idea, but Sai had offered with such guileless solicitousness, and Yamato was pitifully weak-willed when it came to the boy; he buried his face in his folded arms and fiercely willed his loins to behave, aware that he had no one but himself to blame for Sai's slender, skillful hands smoothing sunscreen all over his back, Sai's touch gliding gently (sensually) against his skin, Sai's nearly-naked body hovering so closely over his own.

Prompt:  Shizune/Tsunade - Devotion
Tsunade's smile is ragged and tired when the treaty is finally drawn up and Shizune is sure her own looks no different; the sky outside is growing light and neither of them have had any rest in nearly forty-eight hours, but Shizune has not once thought of leaving Tsunade's side in the interest of catching sleep.  This is where she belongs, and come hell or high water, there's nowhere else she'd rather be.

Prompt:  Lee/Gai - Forbidden
Masturbation is perfectly natural and healthy and there is nothing wrong with it!  That's what Gai-sensei had told him during That Talk years ago, and Lee is too hard and too aroused to resist the urge to touch himself while the shower pours over him.  He's guiltily certain it is wrong, however, that it's Gai-sensei who occupies his thoughts while he does so, Gai-sensei's handsome face and powerful physique that fill his imagination, and it is unquestionably and absolutely Not Right that he should want to feel Gai-sensei's hands in place of his own.

~~~Written 8/23/13 - 8/28/13~~~
Prompt:  Sakumo/Gai - Dad
Gai had always liked Sakumo, and he'd always been able to see where Kakashi's striking good looks came from, but he'd never thought of it as a proper crush.  It would be silly to feel that way about his best friend's father, after all!  But when his own father left the country on business and the Hatakes moved him in so he could finish school among familiar faces, something changed.  He saw more of Sakumo--in every sense of the phrase--and it did appalling things to his hormones.  Sakumo's smile was cheerful and infectious and it gave Gai an invigorating little jolt of happiness every time, along with an unexpected whisper of warmth in his gut.  Sakumo always had time to help Gai puzzle out the most frustrating problems on his math homework, and Gai sometimes found himself asking the man for help with formulas and equations he already understood, simply for the warm feeling he got when Sakumo leaned over his shoulder to read the question and review his work.  And Gai's pulse never failed to jump when he'd pass Sakumo on the way from the shower, clad only in the towel around his waist, smelling clean and damp

That was not a word Gai had ever expected to apply to this man, and it was nothing he would ever admit to Kakashi, but...

"Just call me Substitute-Dad!" Sakumo would say, laughing while he cooked both boys breakfast, and something in Gai's stomach would twist hotly, would turn the innocent and goofy phrase into something entirely inappropriate.  Call me Daddy, he'd hear instead, imagining Sakumo's pleasant baritone softened to a sultry purr, imagining that voice directly in his ear, imagining Sakumo's hands sliding against his skin, and Gai would squirm surreptitiously in his seat at the table, would bury himself in his eggs and rice and pray that Kakashi never found out the kinds of thoughts his best friend entertained about his father.

~~~Written 8/21/13~~~
Prompt: Obito/Shizune - War
He was the bringer of war, one who destroyed while she fought to preserve, and yet they were not so dissimilar; their means were different but she could empathize with the end result he sought.

~~~Written 10/14/13 - 10/16/13~~~
Prompt:  Geico Gecko, Yamato - Creation
When Yamato spotted the little lizard pitifully trying to shelter from the rain under a drooping leaf that simply wasn't up to the task, he assumed it was some sort of summon.  He crouched down, not exactly at eye-level but certainly closer than standing upright.  "You look a bit out of your element, there," he said by way of introduction, speaking over the soft rush of the rain and holding up the flap of his cloak to do what the leaf could not.

The creature blinked up at him, its large eyes shining black in the gloomy grey daylight.  "Well yes, a bit, perhaps--thank you."  It brushed a few beaded drops of water from its head.  "I've been looking for a fellow called Kakuzu, but word has it he's dead.  Which probably explains why he's stopped paying on our contract.  Can't say as I'll miss him--he always did seem a nasty, ill-tempered sort--but I will miss all the money I saved him.  I like saving people money--it's what I'm good at."  It--he, Yamato supposed, if the voice was anything to go by--peered up with hopeful curiosity and an utterly charming little smile that crinkled his eyes from the bottom.  "I don't suppose you have any current insurance needs I could see to?"

"Nope," Yamato chuckled, pressing his hands together in the seal to invoke his mokuton, "but I can do you a favor of a different sort."  Oddly enough he found the lizard likeable, trustworthy and generally 'alright', which gave him slight pause--especially after the admission of being contracted to an Akatsuki.  There was no indication of trickery or genjutsu of any sort, though; Yamato was wary by nature but his instincts had seldom steered him wrong and he'd learned to listen to them.

He rarely worked in miniature, but it was really the same principal as the houses he usually erected, only...less.  He concentrated, murmured the words, and raised a small wooden enclosure with an ornate roof and a pattern of swirling leaves around the door.

"Blimey," the lizard murmured, wide-eyed, and reached out one tiny little...paw? Hand? to touch the nearest wall.  "That's quite an impressive talent you've got there, Mr...?"  He turned, looking up with an expectantly-inquisitive face.


"Well, then, it's nice to meet you, Mr. Yamato."  He stuck out a hand.  "Name's Martin, but everybody just calls me The Gecko."

Carefully, Yamato grasped the tiny appendage between his thumb and forefinger and gently shook, intrigued by the texture of the fingerpads that returned the grip. "A pleasure to meet you too.  It doesn't look like the rain's going to let up for awhile, but this should at least keep you dry."

"Thank you very much."  The Gecko blinked, dipped his head in a grateful little bob, and scurried inside the tiny house Yamato had made only to pop back out the doorway a second later.  "I really do appreciate it; is there anything I can do in return?"

"Nope.  But thanks."

"Well if you ever need financial advice or any kind of insurance, just look me up, eh?"

"I will."  Yamato quirked a smile and turned to go; behind him, he heard the Gecko's voice retreating back inside his wooden creation.

"Lovely, it's quite lovely--dry, cozy...!"

Yamato let his smile grow and moved on through the rain, quietly pleased.

~~~Written 2/11/14~~~
Prompt:  Hashirama/Yamato - Narcissism
"It's not about the DNA.  It's got nothing to do with the DNA," Hashirama asserts between kisses, and Yamato can't help but believe, because the God of Shinobi has absolutely no shred of the self-important conceit that such a title might ordinarily convey.

~~~Written 2/11/14~~~
Prompt:  Shino, Torune - Hold My Hand
Shino does not interbreed his insects with Torune's for practical reasons alone.  It is not just for resistance and immunity in future generations of his swarm.  It is not simply to see how their two varieties of kikaichu meld.  It is not solely for the research value.

It's because eventually, immunity for Shino's swarm could result in immunity for Shino.

It's because Torune has never been able to touch another human being without killing them.

It's because he would like to bring Torune home in the future, after Shino has graduated from the academy, after he's made chuunin and possibly even jounin, after hundreds of generations of his kikaichu have bred and died.  He would like to walk the arbors by the river again, deep on Aburame lands with the cousin who became a brother, and talk the way they used to before Torune volunteered for Root.  He would like to quietly slip his hand into Torune's grasp without the barrier of gloves between them, skin against skin, human and intimate and non-lethal.

It's because he wants Torune to know what it is to touch someone and have them live.

It's because Torune deserves that much.