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If she's to be truthful, then Yukiko knows that she’s too old to like Utena. Or at least, she should be too mature for it. It’s a television show. More than that, it’s an anime that aired when she was four or five or six or somewhere along those lines. It’s before her time. The zeitgeist has passed. And for goodness’ sake, she’s too old to like anime.
She doesn’t really like Utena that much. Or at least, she thinks that there’s reason to not like it. There are parts that she finds strange and doesn’t entirely appreciate, and there are episodes that she wishes she never watched, and she’s only watched it once. It’s a long series, anyway. She doesn’t have the time to rewatch it obsessively. She’d be lying if she said that Utena hadn’t captured her imagination in a way that almost nothing else in the world has. She finds that it tries too hard (or maybe it’s effortless) and much of its symbolism is a bit too fitting to be natural (but what part of literature is natural, anyway) and it’s all so confusing. She doesn’t want to be Utena. She knows that she already has one, a prince of her own. (At least, she hopes Chie doesn’t mind being called a prince. Chie’s always been defensive about things like that.) She thinks that the Inn might be like the academy, but there isn’t an Akio in her life, and there aren’t any roses. She’s a princess who doesn’t need to be rescued from anyone, just from the place as a whole (so maybe—no, she’s tired of the maybes) and her own (destiny? No, not destiny, what kind of world does she think she’s living in—) expectations. Expectations that weigh on her like (not like swords, she’s not in any pain)—swords, maybe or knowledge of the meaninglessness of her own existence. She has Chie, and Chie will rescue her someday, except maybe Yukiko will be a prince, too, the one who breaks free of the cage and disappears into the world.
This is silly. She’s too old for fairy tales and too—practical to run away. Chie’s not a prince, anyway. Chie won’t take her anywhere. Chie’s strong and kind but so useless. Yukiko can’t even persuade her parents to keep a dog. Where is she going to find the strength to leave everything she knows? Yes, of course. That’s why she’s a princess. She’s weak and sad and needs people, needs Chie, even if Chie isn’t—
Who does she think she is, anyway. There aren’t any princes. It’s time to stop dreaming.