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He took from me my brother, and then her, but I find I can't hate him anymore even so. One was an accident. The other-- even I can't blame a man for stealing something that was never mine.
What she and I have is entirely Peacekeeper. Shared danger creates tension, which needs release for optimum fighting efficiency. Nothing more.
Father loved Mother.
I loved my brother.
She loved him.
She will never love me.
Unlike most trained to the Peacekeepers, I know what I'm missing. But I see what losing him, twice, did to her; remember what losing Tauvo did to me. If she loved me, I'd fall, and then if she died?... Madness. Better this way.
So I tell myself.
I can't hate him. But I wonder if I'd have switched lives with him, to have had her love, if only briefly.
Madness, yes. Perhaps they have it right, not to let us love.
