"Let's go to Alaska," Xander said, pointing to the green blob that stood for the state on the world map that they had spread out on the kitchen table.
"Alaska? Why d'you want to go there?" Spike asked.
"Well, I heard that in winter there's like no daylight, so you could be outside almost all of the time with no fear of burning up."
"It's a nice thought, but there's sod all to do up there. You want to go dance with a moose? Play poker with a grizzly bear? It's not as fun as it sounds. And Alaska's got more bloodsuckers than Sunnydale."
"Does Buffy know? Should we tell her?"
"Only if she feels like using a fly-swatter instead of a stake. Mosquitoes, pet."
"Not in winter."
"No, but in winter it's so cold that I'd freeze my toes off, not to mention more important bits of my body. No Alaska."
"All right. How about England? Giles always talked about how rainy it is, which means that the sun must not shine much. When's monsoon season?" Xander asked, leaning over the map to peer at the appropriate purple blob.
"Pretty much Monday through Sunday. But who wants to go to England? We're planning our holiday, which is supposed to be fun, and I left that soggy little island because it's bloody boring. No England, either."
"Okay, you make a suggestion, Mr. Negative."
"You won't go to Alaska because it's dull but you'll go to *Antarctica*?"
"Well, yeah, but there are penguins in Antarctica. And killer whales," Spike said. "Did you know that they'll actually slide all of the way out of the water up onto the ice to catch a seal?"
"And *that's* your idea of a good vacation?"
"We could bring beach chairs and binoculars. Wouldn't even need a cooler for the beer."
"No. Try again."
"I hear Oxnard's lovely in the summer," Spike said with a smirk.
"I'm sorry I ever told you that story," Xander grumbled.
"I'm not." Spike's grin grew even wider. "Especially not since you gave me such an enjoyable demonstration."
"Yeah, but when the bills being stuffed into my underwear come from *my* wallet some of the excitement is lost."
"You seemed pretty excited to me."
"Changing the subject, where are we going to go on vacation?"
"How long do you have off from work?" Spike asked.
"I told you. Two weeks."
"Not long enough to take a hot air balloon around the equator, then. Oh well. Maybe next year."
"You want to what?" Xander gaped at the suggestion until he noticed the corners of Spike's mouth twitching. "Oh. Good. You're kidding."
"'M not. I hear that some of those balloons have satellite hookups; we could watch the telly in the middle of the Atlantic." His lips threatened to turn into an outright grin, but Spike did his best to look sincere. Xander was not amused.
"You're being *extremely* helpful. Thank you *so* much. Why did I even bother asking for time off?"
With one of those eerie shifts of emotion that he was able to execute when things were important, Spike tilted his head and regarded Xander gravely.
"Is this where I'm supposed to say that I'm sorry and that I'll go anywhere as long as I'm with you?" he asked. "Should I suggest staying here because we don't need anything else but each other?"
"No. This is where you're supposed to help me plan a vacation so that we can get the hell away from Sunnydale and go somewhere fun."
The veil of seriousness slipped away, and Spike's eyes regained some of their twinkle.
"It'd be fun here if you danced again," he said. "I know you went to the ATM today, so there's plenty of dosh for me to stick in interesting places..."
"Spike, come on." Xander leaned his head on his hands.
"All right, all right. Where do you want to go, pet?"
"Away. Not Antarctica."
Spike turned the map around and studied it briefly.
"How 'bout Vegas? There's lots to do, no windows in the casinos, and everybody keeps weird hours. We'd fit right in. There's even a rollercoaster."
"I was hoping to see something a bit more... cultural. You know, expand my horizons, see foreign places."
"Hey, don't knock neon lighting and free buffets; they're both important advances for civilization. Besides, they've got the Eiffel Tower, a pyramid, and Venice all in one place. And there's an art gallery. That's cultural."
"And a rollercoaster?"
"On top of a building." Spike grinned triumphantly; Xander was convinced.
"Okay. As long as we don't have to stay at Circus Circus." Xander shuddered at the thought of all of those clowns.
"Nah. We should find one of those hotels that has champagne-cup bathtubs."
"Oh, and a heart-shaped bed that vibrates. Too bad we can't get any use out of the mirror on the ceiling."
Spike's eyes darkened and his voice dropped to a deep purr.
"You'd be surprised. It'd still reflect you."
"Are we even going to get out of the hotel room?" Xander asked as his lap was commandeered by the vampire. He shivered as a cool tongue ran up the side of his neck and blunt teeth fastened gently on his earlobe.
"Maybe not," Spike said between nibbles. He arched his back as Xander's hands began to worm their way under Spike's t-shirt. "D'you have a problem with that?"
"If you're there with me, I can't think of one."
"See? I knew you wanted the sappy answer."
"And a rollercoaster." Xander wrapped his arms tightly around Spike and pressed their lips together.
"Just think what I could do to you *on* the rollercoaster."
"No more vacation talk. Kiss me."
Being a smart vampire, Spike did.