Danny almost can't believe that he's just watched them do that right in front of him. Like he isn't standing there rolling his eyes along with them at the latest McGarrett plan. Then he sees Kono's tiny nod, and then Chin looks away, and Danny starts wondering how they're going to convince Steve that maybe he'd knocked his badge off his belt loop when he got out of his truck. Because lord knows this is a man who isn't at all obsessive about keeping track of his shiny toys.
So when the meeting breaks and Kono heads over to prepare the wire and other equipment that will at least let them hear when their illustrious Commander is about to get his ass kicked tomorrow, Danny follows her and asks.
The sideways look he gets isn't surprised. "City cop," she grins.
"Yeah. But you're good, I'm impressed. If I hadn't been standing, you know, right on top of you..."
She shakes her head, mouth bent now into a nostalgic smirk. "A cop has nothing on more than 30 cousins, a family gathering, and some good old-fashioned double dares."
That startles a laugh out of him. "Oh, I can believe it. You should hear some of the hell we caused at my great-aunt's 90th." Then he stops himself, winces. "Which is only going to happen if any of you and my mother are ever in the same room, at which point I will be checking into a mental institution."
Kono gives him an exaggerated sadface, as fake as the coy giggles and smiles he'd seen her giving the high rollers at the Samoan floating casino the other week. Trying not to remember what other deceptions she had participated in that night, he just waves a finger at her.
"No. Definitely not. I am far more interested in finding out at what age they turned you into a tiny little felon. And whether I'm going to get pulled in as an accessory when Steve finds that you've done..." He frowns at her, a hand dropping to check his own belt. "Just what are you going to do with his badge? Is this some kind of Kelly-Kalakaua hazing ritual?"
Instead of laughing, she actually turns serious and her eyes narrow as she obviously thinks through trusting him on this. He raises his eyebrows, because seriously? Before he can get truly offended, though, she pulls him into her office and opens her top desk drawer.
One look at what's lying inside, and all becomes clear. Clearer, anyway.
"You redesigned it? Is that even legal?"
The punch she gives his arm is a light one, thank god. "Of course not. But we figured we could make a mock-up, and exchange them for a bit. In honor of the new name." She bites her lip. "Think he'll like it?"
Danny reaches out to run a finger over the "5-0" that has been carefully worked into the standard issue shield. It doesn't look at all flashy or crazy. Looks like it belongs there.
He clears his throat. "Yeah. It's...you guys are genius."
Kono's face lights up. "We made one for everyone, actually. Was going to slip you yours, too, but if you want it now..."
"Damn straight I want it now," he says, motioning for her to give it over sooner rather than later. Feeling daring, he adds, "Although I'm crushed that I don't get to catch you trying to put your hand in my pants."
She snorts as she hands him the one with his number without even checking that she got it right. "Like I'd miss."
He ducks his head, hiding his smile with a cough into a fist. Turning the shield in his other hand, he suddenly hits on the one potential flaw in this delightful team bonding exercise they're about to embark upon.
"Your problem, you realize, is going to be dealing with the governor when he decides to take this to her and demand that it be made for real."
Kono eyes him. "You think?"
"Oh, I can pretty much guarantee."
Her mouth purses in thought. "Chin," she decides.
Danny also gives that a second, before nodding in agreement. "That should always be the answer to everything."
Three months later, Danny's beginning to believe that Chin could stop trying to solve quite so many things any time now.
"Your cousin has just informed me that if you come back in a condition other than how you left, it's possible my life will be forfeit."
Kono looks over, taking her eyes off the road long enough to apparently see something in Danny's face that makes her burst into laughter.
"This is so not funny," Danny informs her, quickly punching the button that will save the e-mail as proof, should whoever is investigating his death get to it before Chin does. Actually, he should probably go right to the hosts when they get to the resort and print that sucker out. "He's been muttering things about cliffs and narrow roads since we got this lead. Like it's my fault the bad guys are dealing out of a couples retreat. Those damn things and rainbows practically drive your state industry. Screw Virginia--Hawaii is for lovers!"
And it's not like Chin has been helping his own cause. Every time he's implied that Danny touching Kono outside of operational parameters was punishable by death, he made Danny think about all the ways they were likely going to have to touch each other within operational parameters. Which brings back memories of her mouth opening against his as they both pretended to laugh and stumble, and how she tilted into his hands cupping her face, and he's a guy, for god's sake, while she is undeniably a very hot woman. Who is his teammate and temporary partner--has been on more than one of this type of operation since that first by-the-seat-of-their-pants time. And sure, during those ops they've shared some quick "married" smooches and more than one room (where he's always taken the couch, he'd like to point out, other than the one time Kono arm wrestled him for it and won), but it's actually insulting that Chin thinks he has so little control or respect.
Really, Chin's problem, as far as Danny can see, is that a retreat like this even exists. "Sacred sexuality"? What the everloving fuck?
Kono clears her throat. "You know, he's just irritated that he can't ever go undercover himself."
"While the haole has no problem," Danny sighs. "Yeah, I know."
She shakes her head. "It has nothing with you being a mainlander, other than being a relative unknown," she corrects. "He's finally back on the force, but because of his...notoriety...sometimes, I think, it feels like he's not really. Especially on drug-related cases like this." She shrugs. "It's easier to let it out by going all big cousin on you."
Danny cocks his head at her. "Any other insights you'd like to share?"
Her eye roll borders on epic. "You think you're the only one who's been getting it?"
"Really?" Danny tries to imagine Chin doing his intimidation routine on Kono, and the world grinds to a halt.
"I was beginning to wonder if he's been on one of these retreats himself," she says with a half laugh. "He practically handed me a chastity belt this morning."
"Okay." Danny grimaces. "Neither of those are images I ever needed to have in my head, thank you very much."
Kono just nods as they pass the sign for the Courage to Love workshop and pull into the long driveway.
"And here we are," Danny mutters. "Sweetie."
Check-in is innocuous enough: happy smiles start the moment they're greeted, and keep up through taking their names and all the way to bringing them up to their special home for the weekend. Danny laughs at their jokes, puts his arm around Kono's waist and keeps her close as they get the basic rundown. And though it all, there's this niggling something that says they're not wrong about this place.
"Fucking creepy, is what it is," he opines when the door is firmly closed between them and the happy smiling people outside. "It's like they're stuck that way."
"Come on, Danny, that's pretty standard for island greetings," Kono says with the same overly bright grin.
"Oh, god." He points at her, honestly kind of worried. "Please tell me they don't teach that in the schools, because if Grace comes home doing that in a few years..."
Kono drops the Barbie face and sticks out her tongue at him. "I'm going to call in. Anything you want me to pass on?"
"Just that I'm going to be checking everyone for Stepford circuitry in addition to drug baron tendencies."
She waves a hand dismissively and digs her laptop out of her bag, setting it up at the giant white desk in the common room. Danny moves past her to the window to pull open the blinds and take in the view. It'd be quite impressive, if he weren't so tired of white sandy beaches that he sometimes almost physically longs for choppy waves crashing against a gray boardwalk. More importantly, there still aren't too many people wandering around out there, he sees. The satellite pictures they have provided a great view of the topography of the retreat, but there's nothing except up close and personal that can give you the hidden entrances and bolt holes where close to a thousand kilos of heroin could be stashed.
"I'm going to go reconnoiter," he says, letting the blinds fall shut again to block out the mid-day sun and any peering eyes. Rifling through their other bags, he finds the camera they'd brought like all good vacationing couples should. "See what I see."
Kono is already neck deep in setting up the video line to the men sitting back at HQ, who have got to be twitchy as all hell by now; it's too damn secluded out here to hide vehicle large enough to provide surveillance capabilities that would do any good.
"You do that, honey," she says without looking up.
Danny pauses. Before he can open his mouth, though, she says, "Hey, boss," and Danny puts aside awkward questions about what audience she's playing for now in favor of getting on with doing his job.
Their first command performance is at the opening bonfire. Since everyone else seems to be essentially sitting on top of each other, Danny shifts around until he's got a good depression in the sand under his ass, and then pulls Kono back against him so she's cradled between his legs, her arms hooked over his across her chest.
When the gray-haired man who may or may not know what's going on under his nose starts in on the fragrance of laughter and poetry, Danny struggles to keep his laughter off his face. But he knows that this close, it's got to be translating through their bodies. Kono tilts her head back to give him a little smile that probably looks to anyone else like it's not a smirk, and Danny lets himself think for a moment that he would have stuck in Boy Scouts if he'd known then that fires made girls glow like this.
Everyone at the retreat travels as a set, so after that first afternoon, so do Danny and Kono. It's actually easier, he finds, to get pictures of strange places when your excuse is wanting to capture the image of a beautiful woman draped over this and that.
Back at the fire pit, now cold and filled with dark ash, Kono throws a wrench in that plan.
"Come on, my turn now."
She tugs at the camera strap, but he holds on. "Like anyone is going to buy that one."
"That I want a few pictures of my loving husband?" she asks with a frown.
He shakes his head and backs up, waving at her to head over toward the ropes that are visible now in daylight back along the tree line. "'Loving,' sure. 'Lovely,' no. That's your role in this partnership. So, yes, I think there will be questions."
She doesn't back down, just extends her hand like a command. "Stuff it, Danny, and give me the damn camera."
"Hey now, is that any way to talk to your sweetheart?"
"When he's being an idiot?"
The look she levels on him, he finds himself letting go of the camera before consciously thinking about doing it.
"Okay, okay," he starts, trying to laugh it off, despite the uncomfortable itch between his shoulder blades at the thought of trying to summon up an expression the camera wouldn't call out as more than a little truthful.
But Kono has focused over his shoulder, and her quick look back into his eyes is all the warning he gets before she crowds up into him and attaches them at the mouth.
His hands come up automatically. One lands on her side and the other slides up to her face. It's reflex, and it'll make it look good for whoever she saw behind him. Then her foot hooks behind his and he preps to take the brunt of the fall a second before it happens, leaving him with a very warm partner pressed down against him. A partner who is apparently intent on finding his weak spots, if the way she's now running her lips up his jaw is anything to go by.
"Three guys," she breathes against his neck. He tips his head back, because damn, that feels good, but it also doesn't give him a look at anything other than sky.
"Gonna roll us," he tells her, and feels her nod.
When he does, he lifts his head to grin down at her, and that gives him a much better angle. Yeah, three guys, just visible coming out of the shadows, each carrying a heavy looking duffle bag. One of them is in fact good old George.
Danny drops back down onto Kono and buries his face in her neck as the three step out onto the sand. She giggles and brings her knees up to bracket his hips, and Danny's determinedly paying attention to the wide berth the suspects are giving them.
As soon as they disappear up the beach to the main house, he sits up and tugs Kono up with him. "It can't be that easy," he says. What evil drug mastermind goes out to get stuff from his stash in broad daylight? He's totally using them as further ammunition in the "why Jersey criminals are so very much smarter" argument Steve just won't let go.
"Why not?" She hops up, brushing at the sand that is now everywhere, including all over the shiny and expensive camera. Fantastic. Her cheeks are more than a little flushed, Danny notices as she gives up and tucks her hair behind her ears. But he expects he's not in any better state. They'll be perfectly fine if they show up looking like this; the debauched look is definitely in this weekend. So are tacky shirts, and his is thankfully doing a bang up job of letting him ignore how he's half hard from their very official romp.
He winces, and rises more slowly thanks to his knee having less time and money than hers to fix itself. "Well, it's accessible by water," he notes. "Steve'll be thrilled."
The red in Kono's face is fading fast, and her smile this time is sharp and pleased. "One by sea, three by land."
She ducks into the bathroom the moment they get back to their house, leaving Danny to sit down at the desk to fire up the video link. He's passed on the specifics with only a minimum of digs at the Hawaiian criminal class when Kono emerges again, running a towel over her wet hair, her tank top sticking in all the places she didn't fully dry. Danny turns back to focus on the screen.
"Midnight?" she asks.
"Chin will be there by 11," Steve confirms. "I'll line up a small amphibious team with HPD as soon as we're done here. We'll coordinate via the headsets for the strike."
Danny nods at where he's already got theirs out on the bed. Kono picks them up and moves them over to the desk. Curious, he raises his eyebrows. She gives him a patient look.
"We only have two. Sitting on them would be bad."
"Point," he allows.
"You only rolled the camera through the sand, not water, so the memory card it fine," Chin says. "I've got your photos from around the retreat. We'll check back in at 6 to confirm the meeting point." He's is already looking down away from the webcam, no doubt flipping smoothly through the photos on the high-tech table. One of these days, Danny has no doubt that Chin will make it give them briefings via holograms and none of them will even blink.
"See you then, cuz, boss," Kono says before Danny can, and she reaches over his shoulder to hit the button that closes the connection.
"So," Danny says brightly. Then he turns around to face her and stops dead, because she isn't moving back to give him room and she's so close he can smell the flowery soap they found all over the bathroom. "So, seven hours to kill." He doesn't have the faintest idea where to go from there and his hands fall out of the air with no direction to follow.
Hers have a purpose, though. One brushes at his shoulder, then his neck, then his hair. "You're going to get sand everywhere," she says to his ear.
A twisted smile starts playing at her mouth as she finally looks straight at him. "We keep ending up on these assignments. You've never wondered?"
He feels his eyes go wide. He doesn't dare do anything other than deliberately misunderstand. "Why the two of us? Didn't we kinda cover this in the car?"
She huffs out an impatient breath and takes another step toward him, and okay, she's basically straddling his leg now. That's not so easy to misunderstand.
"Kono..." he warns. But his hands have figured out where they should go, and her hips are warm through the loose shorts. She smiles fully and lets her weight settle on him. It's his good leg, he notices gratefully.
"We've done a little of this, a little of that, but it's all been in the name of duty. I'm curious what would happen if it weren't," she says. Her fingers are running over the outside of his ear and he twitches, his own fingers tightening on her. "Aren't you?"
"Of course." There's no real point denying it. "I'm pretty sure you've never found a guy who isn't. Which makes me curious, because really?" He shrugs, trying to indicate his status compared to the rest of the guys she's hangs out with on a regular basis. He doesn't think of himself as second rate, but he's also not a fan of ignoring facts.
Her mouth firms into the determined look he's seen every time anyone or anything has challenged her. That's when he knows he's not getting out of this without ordering her off him; frankly, they've moved into a space where he's not sure he even has the right to.
She doesn't take up his challenge with words. Instead she goes right for his lips, and Danny realizes a little giddily that she's figured out during the little thises and thats just what he likes. The kiss is direct, no feints or misdirection. Her mouth on his and there's a lot of tongue. He dives right in, pulling her closer. Her breath catches and he groans when her thigh presses into his dick, which hardens even further at the contact.
"Jesus," he says against her mouth, feeling the scrape of her teeth against his lower lip when she grins.
Then she's up and dragging him forward, and they fall on the bed with a bounce, him planted firmly between her legs. He pushes up on both hands to look at her, shaking his head. "We're doing this?" he can't help asking.
She stretches her hands above her head and gives him a smirk with her tongue tucked between her teeth that makes his brain go even farther offline. "Well, I am."
"You're lucky I like a good dose of insane in a woman," he tells her.
Her laugh cuts off on a gasp when he lowers his head to brush his lips against her breast. She's all small curves and muscle--surfing, running, everything she does making the body tightening under him the wonder that it is. Danny slips a hand under her top, pushing it up and up until he can watch his whiter than white fingers against her warm skin and run one over the hard dark nub of a nipple. When he replaces his finger with his mouth and sucks gently, her back arches, her thighs clenching hard on his hips, more responsive than he could dare to ask.
A sharp tug on his hair brings his head back up. Her mouth is red, her teeth digging into her lower lip even now. He surges up to kiss her again, taste what she's done to herself, and she pulls one of her sneaky moves with those long legs and flips them. Thank god the bed is huge and probably meant for this kind of thing. She plants one hand on his shoulder and the other on his chest, effectively pinning him. No way is he objecting, not with that wicked look in her eyes.
"Less clothes now," she orders, shifting on him in small movements that were going to drive him nuts any second. His, "I'm in favor of that plan," comes out more breathless than he'd like.
Kono clearly doesn't care. She slips off him smoothly, and is out of her tank top and shorts in the same amount of time it takes him to decide that just stripping the god-awful shirt over his head is the fastest choice. When he tosses it somewhere off the bed, she's standing there naked already. His mouth goes dry.
"You always have so many layers on," she says with a fond look.
"Yeah, well," he stumbles. Sue him for liking underwear. "It's a thing."
She climbs back on top of him and suddenly her hand is on his dick, squeezing lightly through his pants. His hips jerk up, then again when she puts her teeth on the pulse in his neck.
He can feel the mark she's sucking into his skin while she strokes up his length, and then she grinds her palm down on the head just enough to shut his brain off entirely.
With a growl, he knocks her away and tackles the button and zipper on his pants, pushing and kicking until everything is gone. The second he's bare, her hands are all over him again, running over his stomach, down the crease of his groin. Her thumbs press in and his head tips back. The image of her holding him steady as she takes him deep into her throat flashes through his mind, along with the knowledge that if it happens right now, this is going to be over like that.
He wants more.
"Condom?" he forces out, reaching down to catch one of her wrists. "Do not tell me this place doesn't have them in every available drawer."
Kono holds one up.
"Where in hell were you hiding that?" he sputters.
"My shorts had pockets."
She winks, and he falls back with a chuckle, hearing her tear it open and gritting his teeth as she rolls it down on him with a level of speed and efficiency that he definitely couldn't have managed at this point. Being a detective and all, he had deduced that she'd come out of the bathroom planning this, but now he's really feeling like he's more than a step behind. Incoherency on both sides would be nice.
When she rises up over him, he slides a hand down her side and around, and there she is, wet and hot under his fingers. Her mouth opens on a gasp, her hips rolling forward as he presses up to rub around her clit. After a few moments, he pushes the tip of one finger in, just to test them both, and swallows the spike of satisfaction that comes when she moans, "Danny, god, just do it, do it, do--" breaking off only when he thrusts all the way in and she clenches hard around him.
Another finger, combined with his mouth back on her breast, and she's coming, the high noises she makes as she shivers on top of him sounding like glory. He'd almost forgotten the wonder of making that happen.
He's definitely not forgotten where he is, though. Kono shifts, and it would be enough to set him off if he weren't biting his own lip, now.
"Babe, I gotta--"
Before he can turn them over again, she pulls herself up, reaches back behind her to take him in her hand, and sinks down in one long slide.
"Holy shit, yes."
He has to be bruising her, the grip he's got on her now. He opens his eyes to see her breathing as fast as he is, her grin matching the one he can feel on his face. Then it's a headlong rush to the finish, her hips twisting as she rises up off him, and hard noises jolted out of both of them when Danny braces his feet and thrusts up to meet her as he pulls her back down. Twice, again. Once more and her hand falls to her clit, and she's tightening even more around him, and that does it. Even he can't tell what he shouts when he lets go.
He wakes up chilly. The sun is still bright and he's alone on the bed, covers tangled on the other side. He can hear typing, though. When he pushes up on his elbows, he sees Kono sitting at the desk in front of the laptop, all put together and back in her top and shorts.
"Wearing underwear, this time?" he asks, his voice rough.
She flips him off without looking.
He laughs, and lets himself fall back. Not going to be weird. Good. He'll figure out the rest later. Much later, since his watch says it's only barely 2:30, and that's time he's going to need for something else.
"Seriously, I'm counting on you to protect me if Chin takes one look and tries to shoot me dead," he says to the ceiling.
"Maybe you should try getting up and making the bed," she suggests.
Danny snorts. "Yeah, let me find the clean sheets first."
A pause, and then she's standing over him beside the bed with a faint, pleased smile. "We did kind of wreck these, didn't we?"
"One day I might be able to pass this off as the result of a nap, but today is not that day."
When she leans down, the kiss is dirty from the start. "Worth it."