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Help Me Change The World To Make It A Better Place ~ Lexa

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Chapter 1

Correction to the episode “Thirteen” (3x07)

Clarke knocked at Lexa's door and entered Lexa's quarters, distracted by the thought that she and Octavia were about to leave. When she looked around and didn't find Lexa right away, she went looking for her and found her walking around the corner beside her bed. Seeing the sexy brunette with her hair down, cascading over one shoulder and discreet make-up, made her blink several times at the beauty before her since she had never seen Lexa this relaxed before, sighing in relief with a small smile.

Slowly coming to a halt in front of the intricately carved wall next to her bed, Lexa combed her fingers through her hair and drank in Clarke's beauty with hungry eyes. “When do you leave?” she asked in her softest voice, trying to sound confident and feeling anything but.

“Now,” Clarke answered nodding her head slightly, preferring to stay and watched Lexa nod her head several times as well with shining eyes.

The blonde walked closer to Lexa, so they were only a few feet away from each other in front of the carved wall, the afternoon light bathing them in its warm glow. “I'm sorry,” Clarke tried to apologize.

The ultimatum Octavia had set for her was necessary since she would much rather stay with Lexa. She wanted to stay with the woman she loved without caring what she had to do. But she had no right to do that. She had to be there for her people and make sure that they did the right thing. Which was getting rid of Pike as soon as possible so Skaikru could become the 13th clan again.

“Don't be,” Lexa hurried to reassure Clarke, nodding in understanding. “You have to go back. They're your people.” Swallowing with shining eyes, she gazed at Clarke, debating with herself to finally confess her true feelings, “That's why I l....” but she couldn't bring herself to say the words, she yearned to reveal and instead opted for something saver. “That's why you are you.” She swallowed hard.

Clarke had been looking at the wall next to them, but at Lexa's attempt to disclose her feelings made eye contact, hoping for the brunette to just say it. She didn't want to leave and nodded at the more comfortable words, Lexa had chosen, trying not to show her disappointment.

“Maybe someday, you and I will owe nothing more to our people,” Clarke stated throatily, knowing like Lexa that it would never come to that.

Nodding with a small smile that vanished almost instantly, Lexa retorted, “I hope so.” And she knew, her face showed, that she didn't believe in it one bit, eyes glistening with the feeling of loss.

They gazed at each other for a moment, before Lexa offered her arm for Clarke to take in farewell and looked down, unable to keep eye contact any longer.

Knowing it was futile to do anything else, Clarke grasped Lexa's strong, but oh so soft arm in a firm hold and squeezed tightly as they looked at each other again. This would be the only contact they could have, though Clarke longed for more, some of her desire showing on her face in spite of her attempt not to show it.

“May we meet again,” Lexa rasped, trying to sound light-hearted, but knowing this should be their good-bye.

Gazing at Lexa's beautiful face, Clarke's eyes roamed to the full, pouty lips she so yearned to kiss, back up to the impressive gray eyes, but her own were drawn back to the kissable lips once more. Unable to resist any longer and not caring anymore, because she was sick of waiting, Clarke took the last few steps to close the gap between them, cupping one hand around the back of Lexa's head she captured Lexa's lips in a careful kiss, her other hand coming to rest on Lexa's hip.

Somehow relieved that Clarke threw caution to the wind, Lexa lifted her hands but was afraid to tangle them in Clarke's hair. She knew, they both wanted this, but it was wrong. Their duty was to their people and that should always come first. They couldn't have anything more, than this last kiss and she had to end it right there.

Both of them pulled back at the same time, Clarke searching for confirmation on Lexa's shining face, tears filling the brunette's eyes and one spilled over to roll down Lexa's cheek. Lexa's lips were trembling as Clarke's eyes roamed her beautiful face. But what Clarke found there was refusal, regret and the hardening of the Commander's beautiful features.

The desire on Clarke's face was obvious and it hurt Lexa to no end to refuse her. If she let Clarke kiss her once more, Lexa would be lost to the sensation and she could not let that happen. Not for both of their sakes. So when the blonde wanted to move in to kiss her again, Lexa lifted one hand and pressed it against Clarke's chest firmly to stop her.

“We can't, Clarke. You have to leave or you're going to die,” Lexa said firmly her heart almost breaking at the sight of Clarke's disappointment and hurt.

Resigned, but knowing deep down, that Lexa was right, Clarke nodded with a deep sigh and stepped back, tears starting to sting her eyes. “May we meet again,” Clarke reciprocated huskily, after a last, long, lingering look and turned to leave Lexa's room.

Lost in thought, Clarke returned to her room, gathered her jacket and bag and walked to the elevator which would bring her to the ground.

∞ ∞ ∞

Octavia was standing in the entrance of an old building, thinking about the last few days.

It had never been her intention to help set a trap for her brother and his team. She wanted to stop a massacre and not kill Monroe in the process. Obviously she had underestimated the desperation of the Trikru, after all of their warriors had been killed by Pike and his cohorts.

Pike... what she wouldn't give to get rid of him once and for all. She hoped, that with Clarke's help they would be able to accomplish that.

Feeling guilty, Octavia shook her head as tears of frustration filled her bloodshot eyes. They needed a plan of how to get Clarke into Arkadia, so she could take care of Pike.

The light reflecting off of a blond head caught her attention and took her from her thoughts. She watched Clarke walk towards her with a relieved smile.

Almost skipping down the steps, Octavia waited for Clarke to catch up with her. “I'm glad you're here.”

Clarke lifted a corner of her mouth in a small smile and nodded as Octavia fell into step beside her. “We have to do something about Pike,” Clarke remarked as they started to walk towards the stables side by side.

Clarke had to admit to herself, that she would rather stay with Lexa and learn what she was about to say to her. She suspected it would have been a confession of love, but obviously the brunette wasn't ready to reveal her feelings yet. The past few days had been intense for both of them, starting with the fact, that Clarke hadn't been able to end Lexa's life when she had the chance.

Nodding, Octavia smiled brightly and was happy, that Clarke turned out to be exactly the person, Octavia thought her to be. Honorable, compassionate and ready to fight for her people, when it came to it. Pike, Kane and Abby might think they were the leaders but Octavia knew that in truth Clarke was their heroine. The things, Clarke had accomplished since they landed on Earth were amazing, even if her way of doing things was unorthodox like letting a Trikru village with their own people in it get bombed. But Indra had convinced Octavia, that it had been the right thing to do or they wouldn't have been able to get things done.

Thinking back to that fateful moment, Clarke knew why she wasn't able to kill Lexa. In spite of the fact, that Lexa had abandoned her at Mount Weather and in turn forced Clarke to kill all those people, Clarke was in love with the Commander. Simple as that. She had seen Lexa's soft side during the past couple of days and she found it incredibly appealing. If Lexa hadn't stopped her, Clarke would have made love to her, not caring what would happen if she didn't get behind the blockade in time.

“Octavia kom Skaikru,” Indra's voice suddenly boomed behind them and took them both from their respective thoughts.

Stopping, both women turned to watch the warrior walk up to them. The dark-skinned woman with one arm in a sling, acknowledged Clarke's presence with a curt nod, before she offered her arm to Octavia, which the brunette took in a firm grip.

Determined to help get rid of Pike after Octavia's passionate words, Indra strode along between Clarke and Octavia as they made their way to the stables and they were on their way to Arkadia soon.

∞ ∞ ∞

Lexa felt the urge to be close to Clarke in a way and left her room to go to the quarters, Clarke had been living in since Prince Roan, now King Roan had brought the blonde to Polis.

Lexa had almost revealed her true feelings to the other woman, but the knowledge that Clarke would probably not reciprocate her love had stopped Lexa from taking that last leap of faith. The past few days had brought them closer together and they had found some kind of truce, but after what she had done to Clarke, Lexa was sure that the Sky Girl didn't have romantic feelings for her. Even if Clarke had tried to initiate another kiss, that didn't mean she had genuine feelings for Lexa. She had no idea what to think right now.

Lost in thought about Clarke, Lexa entered the room to find Titus waiting there.

“Titus? Ha yu komba raun hir?” What are you doing up here? the Commander asked in her most commanding voice and her eyes roamed to the bed, where a man with brown hair, who had obviously been beaten was tied up and gagged.

His tattered clothes showed the Commander that he must belong to Clarke's people, which irritated her to no end. “Titus, chon em bilaik? Gouva yu klin.” Titus, who is this man? Explain yourself. With a stern gaze, the Commander looked back at her teacher as she clasped her hands behind her back and waited for an explanation. “Chomouda yu don sis op disha hef kom Skaikru gon honon?” Why are you holding this man of Skaikru prisoner? the Commander continued, when Titus tried to evade her eyes and didn't answer.

Not having expected Lexa to find him, Titus cringed internally but didn't show it on his face; seeing that Murphy was awake, Titus changed to Gonasleng, “He was caught stealing from your people on their way to Polis market.” Thinking that maybe he could stop Lexa from asking any more uncomfortable questions, Titus added, “I learned he has vital information that might interest Wanheda. He also tried to kill Clarke a few times in the past, because she had him punished.”

Hearing Titus' lies, Murphy tried to speak through his gag, but to no avail of course and he watched the brunette walk up to him and look down at him with a cold stare. Who was this chick anyway? He had never seen her before and wondered, what her status among the Grounders was.

Someone who tried to kill Clarke didn't deserve Lexa's forgiveness and she'd make sure, this man got what he deserved. A plan started to form in her mind, while Titus continued.

“Heda, we should find out what information he has. Then I think WE should punish him for what he did to innocent travelers,” Titus insisted passionately, walking up next to the Commander, after stashing a gun into his pocket inside his cloak inconspicuously.

Still staring at the man, the Commander turned her head to Titus. “I think it should be up to Clarke, what to do with him.” For Clarke to decide this, someone would have to bring him to her.

Should that someone be Lexa herself? It would probably not hurt for her to travel to the blockade to help enforce it. She would be there to speak to their leader, whoever that might be, after they took care of Pike.

“Commander! Do you really think Wanheda would punish one of her own people? We should set an example...!” He was cut off by the lift of the Commander's trademark hand and realized his mistake too late.

This was the infamous Commander? Murphy was astounded at hearing it. He had expected the Commander to be a man, first and foremost and a big one at that. Seeing this beautiful, fragile woman, he couldn't help but wonder if the stories he heard were true. Of the Commander being a fierce and ruthless leader. Could this small woman really be that person?

“You said it yourself, Titus. She punished him before. So I don't think she would have a problem to do so again, do you?” With a last look full of venom at the Skaikru man, the Commander turned to Titus fully. “It is settled then. I will bring him to Arkadia and enforce the blockade, while I am there.”

“Lexa, you can't just leave! We need you here!” Titus couldn't believe his ears.

Again, Lexa was willing to forget her duty and be with Clarke. That woman infuriated him to no end. He had to find a way to get rid of the Sky Girl once and for all, so Lexa could concentrate on her duties again.

“With Queen Nia out of the way, there is no need for me to be here,” the Commander stated coldly. “King Roan won't march his army against us. I spared his life!” The Commander couldn't believe, she was again explaining her actions to her teacher and became a little louder than probably necessary. “But I have to try and prevent a war between us and the Skaikru. I should be there when Pike falls.” Before Titus could protest, the Commander lifted her hand once again. “And you will take care of things here in Polis during my absence, Titus.”

Grinding his teeth, Titus stared at Lexa coldly but nodded. She WAS the Commander after all and he had no right to tell her what to do. “Yes, Heda.”

“Prepare the prisoner for departure. I will change and meet with the guards at the stables,” the Commander ordered, watching Titus pull the man roughly to his feet.

Leading the way out of Clarke's room, Lexa observed Titus push the man into the elevator, before she entered her own quarters to change into her travel clothes.

Before she got ready though, Lexa took a moment to remember her farewell from Clarke and stroked through her hair absentmindedly as she stood at the foot of her bed. Lifting one hand, she touched the scar at the back of her neck underneath their sacred symbol tattooed there, wondering if the first Commander would approve of a relationship between Lexa and Clarke.

97 years earlier

Becca Premheda opened the door of the Pod she just landed in on the radiation soaked and destroyed earth and climbed out.

“Suit breach. Suit breach,” the computer announced emotionless.

Stumbling slightly, Becca righted her helmet and looked around her wasted surroundings.

“Suit breach. Suit breach.”

“Radiation level... critical,” another alarm sounded and Becca grabbed the arm with the wrist computer to take a look at the display, where the controls showed that the radiation indicator was climbing into the read area and the white words started to blink red. “Radiation level... critical.”

Becca lifted her glove covered hands and opened her helmet with a sigh, feeling hot and sweaty from the excitement and exertion. Taking a closer look around, she spotted a huge skyscraper some distance away as the nuclear storm raged around her, flashes hitting the ground and black clouds with god knows what swirling around her. Her eyes were drawn to the ground by movement ahead of her and she watched people in hazmat suits walk towards her through the debris and destruction.

Lifting a hand in greeting, Becca shouted, “I'm here to help!” as the group of people kept coming towards her.


Sighing deeply, Lexa started to braid her hair and tied them with her usual tiny white rubber bands before she gathered some things and then changed into her black travel outfit, complete with cloak, shoulder guard and gloves. After taking a last look around, Lexa left her room to join her guards on the ground and they headed for the blockade.

To be continued....