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"Such a way with words, Rand."

"Stop laughing."

"See, this is why I don't, like, talk to people. Too much fucking trouble."

"Are you laughing with me or at me?"

"Uh…"

"Shit, it's like you can't say anything anymore! I don't have a problem with the middle-aged. I mean, you're-"

"Hey."

"…Some of my best friends are overweight."

"A few are even straight, I hear."

"Some are women. My mom's a woman."

"Tell her hi."

"I will… Perverts? I love them, too. Again, you're-"

"Hey… Wait, that one's okay."

"It's just when you put all four things together…"

"Traumatizing flashbacks, scarring memories, swarms of ladies who love too much."

"Yeah."

"I'm sure they'll get over it."

"You know the only ones upset by it were the ones who fit the description exactly."

"Down to the dirty pic-… I don't even have a picture of your dick."

"So?"

"Just seems wrong."