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Loving The Void

Summary:

When Stiles is left feeling abandoned by the people around him, the Nogitsune comes into his life. Promising a life free of anymore pain and the ability to prove his strength, Stiles accepts the dark kitsune’s offer and is possessed by him. The Nogitsune uses the possession to go after the people who have hurt Stiles the most before he’s stopped. But the Nogitsune is a vengeful thousand year old spirt after all and when separated from one of the only people he’s cared about in his many years of his existence, it’s a sure fact that he won’t stay gone long. Will Stiles ever get the happy ending he deserves or will the people he’s sacrificed everything for keep him from getting what he needs?

Notes:

Hey guys! It’s my first fic on AO3! I’ve been writing on Wattpad for a while so I am pretty used to writing but please bear with me if this fic isn’t up to everyone’s standards since I’m not used to writing fanfics quite yet. This fic is cross posted on Wattpad for those who couldn’t see/use the link, my username is: brooklynfee and this story is posted in my fanfiction oneshots book! Anyways this is a Voiles relationship (Nogitsune (Void)/Stiles) story and I really hope you guys enjoy it! I’m going to try and finish it within the next week or so and it should be about 5 chapters! Anyways, one last thing that should be mentioned is that in this fic season 5 takes place before season 3. It’s not a big part of the story but some names and events from season 5 are mentioned and hinted at so don’t feel confused! This can still easily be read without being up to season 5 though! Enjoy!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: Chapter One

Chapter Text

Stiles was tired.

In every way possible.

Tired of the constant feeling of guilt always following him around reminding him of how he killed his mom. Tired of fighting and doing everything he can for a pack who doesn't give a shit about him. Tired of Scott taking constant advantage of him and reminding him of what a bad person he is. And because of all these reasons, Stiles was kept up late at night causing him to loose every ounce of sleep. So yeah, Stiles was tired.

It was about 9:00 one night when Stiles had gotten home from helping out Scott and Derek at the loft. They were working on a small case which was quite unusual for the pack and people of Beacon Hills considering they seemed to be under constant threat of attacks by different creatures. The past two weeks had been quiet for everyone and it was eerily suspicious, and Stiles knew something was coming. One piece of advice he had gotten and always used from his mom was for him to always trust his gut, so when he had the instinctual feeling that something was coming soon to Beacon Hills, soon to him, he knew that's exactly what would occur.

The feeling had been building over the last week and tonight he had decided to finally tell Derek and Scott about it. His strong Alpha best friend and the original Beta would be the perfect power duo to take down whatever it was that was coming for them, for him, so he knew they should be informed. He had hoped the pair would take his news seriously but life was horrible to Stiles so like always, things didn't go that way.

"What the hell are you talking about Stiles?!" Scott had demanded when he brought up news of a possible attack coming soon. "A new attack. How could you know that an attack is coming? You're not a werewolf or any supernatural creature. Not nearly an Alpha like me.You're just Stiles. A weak, fragile human." Scott sneered causing Stiles to have to choke back tears to hold onto the last bit of his pride.

"It's my instincts Scott. You remember what she told me. Always trust your gut, and my gut is telling me this calmness is exactly that. The calm before the storm." Stiles pleaded with his best friend to understand.

"Ok let's say you're right Stiles which you're probably not. Even if something is coming what is it? When exactly is it coming? How can we prepare? Answer those questions and maybe I'll take your pleads for attention seriously." Scott huffed angrily glaring at his once self proclaimed 'brother'. And that was it. In that moment with Scott's voice taunting him and not believing him, Stiles Stilinski, the once thought unbreakable human boy finally broke. His mind was like a movie of old painful flashbacks.

"You killed your mother Stiles. And now you're killing me." His dad had said in his hallucination after ingesting the wolfsbane at Lydia's party that night. Even though his father hadn't actually spoken the words to him in real life, he knew the words were hiding there behind the face of his father every time he looked at him.

"Thank you son I should have had." His dad had said to Scott, although a joke it had still hurt him deeply although he never let it show, like always.

And finally what should've been the end of their friendship. When Scott believed the lies of a stranger over Stiles truth. How he pleaded with Scott to say he believed him and Scott told him he couldn't. That had put a huge crack in Stiles heart which unknowingly would only take one more blow before breaking which Scott had just delivered in the loft.

"Just back off Scott. Maybe Stiles is right." Derek had stepped in to try and ease the tension between the pair and reassure Stiles. Although he had put on the act he hated the Bambi eyed teen, Derek had grown to care and appreciate the 17 year olds efforts behind the scenes.

"You know what, it's fine Derek. If you guys don't want to believe me that's fine! And no Scott, I can't answer those questions but that doesn't mean I'm wrong! Maybe I am just a human, just Stiles not even close to an Alpha but that doesn't mean my thoughts or opinions are invalid. Do you even remember when we used to say we were brothers? Before you turned out to be a werewolf and learned to see yourself as better than me? You know when you first got turned I was happy for you. Happy you finally got the girl of your dreams and were able to do things you could only dream of, I thought things were looking up for us. But than you chose to leave me in the dust. To fiend for myself and I've decided I'm sick of it. I kept holding onto the thought that I was pack but lately I've realized I haven't been in the first place, so good luck Scott, Derek. Whatever comes you can deal with on your own because I'm done being unappreciated and mistreated by the people I learned to trust and care for!" Stiles shouted before running out of the loft, not taking the time to see Scott and Derek's deeply shocked and saddened faces, not that he could've with the constant stream of tears running down his face blurring his vision. He sped home in Roscoe taking some time to recoup when he parked in the driveway before going into the house.

And that led Stiles up to the current moment in time. He unlocked the door using his key before looking around the dim house. There was a note left on the ground just past the entrance into the house which Stiles picked up to read.

'Working late tonight. Don't know what time you or I will be home so money on the counter for dinner if you get none with Scott. Have fun, be safe and I'll try and be home at a reasonable hour.
-Dad'

The message was longer and kinder than normal making it easier for Stiles to wipe the drying tears from his still damp eyes. He was glad his dad wasn't home for once to see him in this state. Stiles took the note and walked into the kitchen/living room turning on the lights as he went. He dropped his backpack lazily on the ground spotting the money his dad spoke about sitting on the counter. With Stiles blow up occurring not long ago, he really had no appetite so he left the money where it lay. He took one last glance around the open room before heading back to the house entrance and going up the stairs. Going through the hallway into his room, Stiles got a weird tingling in his stomach and the strange combination of feelings of anxiety, fear and a strange comfort.

Not knowing what to do about the weird feelings he was getting, Stiles continued to walk to his room. He went directly to the connected bathroom after turning the lights on in his room and began to wash his face with cold water. The frozen liquid to his overly warm face made him sigh in relief before looking up into the mirror. He wasn't happy with the sight. His normally full of life amber eyes were seemingly dull and empty with the sadly familiar sight of grey bags under them. His face almost seemed aged from stress and lack of sleep and it made him cover his face with his hands to keep him from looking again. He shook his head before flicking off the light switch and moving back to his room before picking up a vinyl and placing it on the record player and collapsing on the bed. He laid there looking to the ceiling resting his eyes and letting the music calm him before hearing his phone buzz multiple times interrupting his peace. He looked at the phone in his hand seeing messages from both Scott and Derek.

Stiles bro, I'm sorry ok? I know I should believe you but It's hard sometimes you know? Ever since the Theo and Donovan thing it's been hard for me to believe or trust anyone! Me and Derek will look into it ok? But I really need you to give me more details!
-Scott

Stiles snorted reading the message from his 'bro'. The message really showed the type of person Scott always was. Acting like the good guy by 'apologizing' and than going back to his old behaviours. And saying he didn't trust anybody? Stiles couldn't help the dark chuckle he let out at that part. Stiles was the only one Scott had been treating any differently since the Theo and Donovan incident. But that was something Stiles really didn't want to go into or think about anymore. He quickly deleted the message so he wouldn't have to look at it anymore before moving onto Derek's.

Stiles. I know I've acted like a complete asshole ever since we met and I know it doesn't show which I'm sorry for, but I really care about you. You're smart, funny and the most caring person I know so when you say you have a feeling in your gut, I trust you. Give me and Deaton the information and we'll start preparations for whatever it is that's coming. I care about you Stiles and whatever it is, we'll take care of it. Together if that's what you want or else I'll take care of it on my own so you won't have to get involved. As for Scott, I'll talk some sense into him but I'm leaving him out of this since he's proven he can't be the leader he's supposed to. Stay safe, we'll talk later.
-Derek

Stiles couldn't stop his smile. He had always cared for Derek and knew if anyone were to believe him about the situation it would be him. He's proved over the years that he was strong, reliable and had a good heart. Truly Stiles had thought Derek cared for him and he was so happy he was right. Stiles wanted to get close to Derek and become a good friend with him, Derek's life was a difficult one and Derek deserved nice things so if he could even slightly give a good thing to him, he would be happy. Stiles sent a quick response back thanking Derek for believing in him and that they would talk more about the 'case' later. He set his phone back down on the bedside table before going back to closing his eyes and just listening to some music. Without realizing it Stiles went into a calming sleep for the first time in a while.

——————————————————————

It was hours later. Stiles woke up to the horrible feeling of dread and that returning feeling of a strange comfort. He was feeling more confused than ever. How could two emotions so different and opposite seem so right together. He shook the thoughts out of his head before wiping his sleepy eyes and looking around the room. The room was much darker than before letting him be aware that he's been asleep for quite awhile. Shadows danced around the room and moonlight peaked through his closed curtains. But something didn't seem right. Sitting up, Stiles strange combination of feelings got stronger and stronger and he felt a strange cold breeze blow past him causing him to shiver. Why was it so cold? It was October in California and even though it cooled down at night Stiles knew it couldn't have gotten that cold. And even if it was, Stiles didn't remember his window being open.

All of the sudden Stiles heard footsteps coming from the corner of his room. His eyes jump immediately to the sound's direction to see a lean figure coming his way. Panicking, Stiles tries to flick on the lamp to see who or what is coming towards him but for some reason the light doesn't come on. The shadow continues its slow, creeping stride towards the foot of Stiles bed before the moonlight hits the figure lighting up its features and honestly, Stiles hasn't been more scared of anything than what he's seeing right now.

It's him. Stiles is looking at his clone. A mirror image of himself with only minor differences as paler skin and darker eye bags and non physical traits like the evil but oddly soothing aura around him. Stiles feels his chest pounding and his breathing go shallow as 'he' comes towards himself.

"Hello Stiles." A voice way too similar to his greets him. "It's so great to finally meet you in person." The voice practically purrs at him causing a shiver of fear to run up and down his spine.

"W-what are you? What do you want?" Stiles erratically beating heart and breathing makes the panic evident in his stuttering voice.

"Well Stiles. I'm what you call a nogitsune and you need to calm down, I'm not here to hurt you. Quite the opposite actually." The voice tries to soothe him as he walks closer to him, sitting on the end of his bed as Stiles moves as far back to the headboard as possible.

"What do you mean?" He asks, forcing his voice out steadier than before hating that this thing's reassurance calmed him down more than he'd like to admit.

"I've been watching you, observing you for weeks. I've listened to your conversations, even been through your memories and dreams and I've seen how they treat you. Like a pack bitch. Expecting you to take all the abuse they give you and still come back again and again to do as they ask. You don't deserve that Stiles. Don't you see that? You're more intelligent than all of them combined and cunning like a fox. You don't need them and they act like they don't need you. How much more are you willing to take?" The nogitsune whispers to him as tears work their way back into Stiles eyes as the dark spirit shuffles over on the bed to caress his cheek. He tries to lean away from the touch but finds himself wanting it, needling it even.

"You deserve better Stiles. Just because you don't have superhuman strength and abilities doesn't mean you're worthless. Scott needed that bite to show that he could do anything at all but you, you're still better than him as a human. If anyone deserves to be an Alpha, especially a true Alpha, it's you not him." The 'clone' pleads with him and Stiles feels himself falling. Falling into the words of someone he doesn't know, something that looks just like him all because it cares. And he's so desperate he feels as though he'd do anything for something to love him, someone to care for him.

"But all that pain can change Stiles. You won't have to worry about being taken advantage of anymore. I'll protect you and make you stronger, stronger than you've ever been before and we'll prove to Scott and Lydia and everyone that you are better than them all combined. Strong, powerful, cunning and perfectly worthwhile." The kitsune imperceptibly seduces him with his sweet but truthful words. "All you have to do is say yes. We'll be in this together. Forever. Never alone and feeling worthless again. Just. Say. Yes." He whispers, getting closer with every word until his breath is hitting Stiles whimpering, trembling lips with the last words. Stiles feels his mind spinning and can't find his way through the fog clouding it but then all he can think of is what the Nogitsune reminded him of. He's been mistreated for so long, doesn't he deserve at least a bit of happiness or at least a chance at it? But is he ready to give up on his bestfriend? Thinking about it though, would Scott really miss him?

"You're not a werewolf or any supernatural creature. Not nearly an Alpha like me. You're just Stiles. A weak, fragile human."

And with that thought he makes the decision he knows could change his life forever, for better or worse.

"Yes." He whispers.