Chapter 1: Moving in with Snape
Harry was sitting in front of professor Dumbledores desk in his office. The Hogwarts express was to departure in a few hours. Harry was sitting on needles, wondering what the headmaster wanted to talk to him about.
”Harry my boy”, Dumbledore said. ”I have failed you.”
The headmaster looked down on Harry with sadness in his eyes.
”Sir?” said Harry, feeling confused.
”I was aware that Petunia and Vernon never treated you like their own son. But I should have removed you when I realised exactly how bad it was. I let my conviction of the protection of your mothers love affect my decition. For that Harry, I am truly sorry. ”
”Oh”, Harry said, ”it´s fine.”
”It most certainly is not”, said Dumbledore and looked determined. ”I will press charges agains your relatives for their abuse, and I have decided it is time for you to live with someone who will feed you and give you clothes that actually fit. But more importantly someone who will care for you and want what is best for you.”
”I´m leaving the Dursleys?” Harry almost left his seat in exitement.
”I have made arrangements for you as soon as you leave for the summer break today.
”Where am I going?” Harry asked.
”In your parents will it stated, in the events of something happeing to them you should go to their best friend, your godfather, Sirius Black. But as it is, Mr Black is in the Azkaban prison. ”
Harrys eyes widened. His godfather was a criminal?! Or more importantly, he had a godfather?
”Their next choise of a guardian, Dumbledore continued, ”is a man called Remus Lupin. He was also their best friend, but he is I am afraid, unable to care for a child with the way he lives. He is a werewolf and has been forced to go under ground, by the way society treats him.”
”So...who am I staying with?” Harry asked. He felt quite downhearted. His parents had wanted to give him to a criminal and a werewolf. Was his new guardian even going to be better than the Dursleys?
”Your mother, Lily, made an addition to the will. Should any of the assigned guardians be unable or unsuited to care for you there was a third option.”
”Who?” Harry asked curiously.
”Severus Snape”, said Dumbledore.
Harry couldn´t hold back.
”Snape?” he blurted out. ”But sir, he hates me. Didn´t you say you would place me with someone who would care for me. He absolutely loathes me.”
”Professor Snape Harry, and he doesn´t hate you”, Dumbledore said. ”But I can see why you would think that. He, as well as myself, have made misstakes. He and your father didn´t get along during their schoolyears. He was however a good friend to Lily, and in the end even he and your father managed to behave civilized to each other. I assume you just reminded Severus of James and how he was as a child. Severus is willing to take on the responsability as your guardian, if you want to go.”
”You mean I don´t have to?” Harry asked.
”You have the possability to express your wishes, yes”, said Dumbledore smiling.
Harry thought about it for a moment. Anything was better than the Dursleys. And besides, with Snape as a guardian, he would grow up in a wizards house. That would be so cool.
”I want to go”, he said and looked up at Dumbledore.
Dubmledore smiled at him. ”I understand you and Severus may have your difficulties, but I am sure this will be for the best. If you want to you can travel with him to Spinners End, your new home. Or you can go with your friends with the Hogwarts express and have Severus pick you up at Kings Cross station in London.”
Harry didn´t need to think about it.
”I want to go with my friends”, he said.
”I thought you would”, smiled Dumbledore, ” I assume you have a lot to talk about”.
”You what?!” Ron almost screamed out when they boarded the Hogwarts express for London.
”Calm down and let him explain”, said Hermione and rolled her eyes at Ron.
”It can´t be worse than the Dursleys” Harry said.
”Yes it can!” Ron threw his arms in the air.
”You´re only saying that because you´ve never experienced them”, Harry sighed.
”Harry, I think you are making the right decition. Besides, imagine what advantage you´ll have over the rest of us. Living with a teacher for a parent, that´s the dream”, Hermione sighed.
”He´s not gonna´ be my parent. Just my guardian”, Harry protested.
”And what do you think a guardian is exactly?” asked Hermione and crossed her arms in front of her.
”Well...”, Harry hesitated. ”I´ll live with him and he´ll take care of me?”
”And he´ll make sure you have everything you need. That includes rules as well as affection”, Hermione said.
”And does that sound like Snape to you?” asked Ron with rased eyebrows.
”His parents assigned him. They must know he´d be the best choice”, Hermione argued.
”Actually, he was their third choice. But since the criminal and the werewolf were unable, he´s the one I´m living with”, Harry smiled at their reactions. The rest of the journey passed in an enjoyable manner. They played exploding snap with Dean, Seamus and Neville (Hermione and Neville abandonned the game after few rounds to look at a plant professor Sprout gave Neville to care for over the summer break). As the train came into the platform, Harry felt butterflies fly all around his stomach. A sudden realization of what he had agreed to hit him hard, but he managed to calm himself. His mother had known Snape, they were friends, and she had trusted him with her child. This was all going to be fine, he told himself.
As Harry got of the train he spotted the Weasleys in the crowd. He and Hermione said goodbye to Ron, who ran of o greet his family.
”Don´t forget to write!” Hermione yelled after him. She turned to Harry.
”How are you feeling?”
”I´m okay”, he said looking around for Snape.
”Okay. Remember to send Hedwig if you need to talk or anything”, Hermione said and pulled him in for a hug. ”There he is”, she wispered in his ear.
Snape made his way through the crowd and Hermione let go of Harry.
”I should go find my parents”, she said and took off.
”Potter”, said Snape. ”Are you ready to go?”
”Yes sir”, said Harry and picked up Hedwigs cage, and tried to managed both that and his nimbus and coffert. Snape didn´t notice Harry´s struggle and led the way out of the platform. Once they were outside, he took a turn and went in to an alley behind the parking lot. He turned around an faced Harry.
”Potter”, he said. ”Have you ever travelled by side-along-apparation?”
”Er...no”, said Harry wondering what the hell apparation was.
Just as Snape offered his arm to Harry he noticed the luggage and shrunk everything down and put it in his pocket. He opened Hedwigs cage before shrinking it and let her out.
”She needs to stretch her wings. She will find us later. Now, hold on tight Potter”, he said and once again offering Harry his arm.
Harry took a tight grip and a second later he felt like he was been pressed through a small pipe. He felt dizzy and he thought he was going to be sick, when it stopped and he took a deep breath of fresh air. He would have fallen to the ground if Snape hadn´t stadied him with a hand on his shoulder.
”This way Potter”, said Snape and led the way,
Harry finally noticed they weren´t at Kings Cross anymore. They were outside a small cottage house that looked like no one had been living there for at least a century. It looked like they were on the outside of the village. Harry couln´t help thinking it quite fit the picture of where he had thougt Snape would live.
”Well come on Potter”, Snape said and walked towards the small fence that separated the overgrown garden from the lane. Once they entered the gate, Harrys view changed, He managed to hide his surprise when the unkempt garden was replaced with a well kept ground with an aisle bordered with chestnut trees. The aisle led up to a fountain that was in front of a large manor. The manor and the park was surrounded with a great white wall. Harry stood still for a moment and just stared at everything. This was not at all what he had been expecting. He felt a hand on his shoulder.
”Come on Potter, I don´t want to stand out here all day. I will show you around the grounds later”, Snape said.
”Yes sir”, Harry said and followed the professor to the entrance door. They stepped into a large foyer and Snape led them trough and up a the stairs. It was a grand stair in white marble with a dark green velvet carpet on. Once they were upstairs Snape gestured to the first door to the left,
”This is my bedroom. Don´t go in there unless it is an emerancy”, he said.
”I won´t”, Harry said wondering what that emerancy could be. If the house was on fire maybe,
”This is the bathroom”, said Snap and gestured to the second door. ”And in here is your room.” Snape opened the last door in the corridor and they walked inside. The walls were a crispy white and the heavy velvet drapes where a midnight blue. Straight across from the door was the bed, and both that and the desk and wardrobe were in oak wood.
”You may decorate as you want, but I am not painting the walls blood red like you barbarians in Gryffindor tower”, Snape said and pulled Harrys coffert and Hedwigs cage along with his Nimbus out of his pocket. He put them on the floor and unshrunk them.
”No, I like it the way it is”, Harry said. ”It´s sort of relaxing.”
”I´ll let you get settled in. How about dinner in 30 minutes? Or did you stuff yourself full with sweets on the train?” Snape asked.
”No, 30 minutes will be fine”, said Harry,
”The dining room is downstairs, the double doors to the left once you come down the stairs. And wash your hands before dinner. ”
”Yes sir”, Harry said. This was going to be interesting he thought. He had no idea Snape was living this fancy. He wondered what Snape thought about suddenly being Harrys legal guardian. He didn´t act like he liked any of the children at Hogwarts, except maybe for the slytherins. But he must have been looking forward to a quiet summer, and got landed with Harry. 30 minutes later he made his way downstairs and found the dining room at once. It contained a long dining table in mahogny wood. The walls were decorated with large oilpaintings of a forrest, a sea and a meadow. The end of the table was set for two, and Snape was already sat in a chair.
”Potter, don´t linger over there. Come and eat”, he said. Harry sat down and smelled the wonderful fragrance of a stek and kidney pie. Snape handed him the cutlery.
”Help yourself”, he said.
Harry put a piece on his plate and took a large bite.
”It´s delicious”, he said. ”I didn´t know you could cook professor.”
”I didn´t”, said Snape. ”I have house elves. And please don´t talk with your mouth full.”
Harry swallowed. ”What are house elves?”
”Oh Salazar, I forget how little you know of the world”, Snape said. ”House elves are creatures that live to serve others. They cook and clean, and pretty much anything you tell them. In this house there are 28 of them.
They tend to the park and the manor. Some of them I even trust with my green house and herb garden.”
”You have your own green house?”, Harry asked.
”Yes Potter. Like I have been telling you in class for the past year, it is of utter importance to have the best ingredients when you are brewing. Maybe someday you will actually pay attention in class”, said Snape and raised his eyebrows.
”Yes sir”, Harry said and continued eating.
After a few minutes of silence, Snape put down his cutlery.
”Potter, there are a few things we need to talk about”, he said.
Harry looked up from his plate.
”Sir?” he asked.
”As you are aware, your parents named me your legal guardian. When you are living with me I expect you to follow the rules I set. And not just do as you please, as you normally do at Hogwarts.”
”I promise I will behave sir”, said Harry and looked down.
”And I also expect you to come to me if there is a problem of any kind”, Snape continued. ”It is my responsability to make sure that you are alright, and well cared for.”
There was a silence and Snape eyed Harry.
”Do you have any questions?”, he said.
Harry looked up at the potions master.
”Do you even want me here?” he finally asked.
Snape raised his eyebrows, and Harry thought he saw a small smirk fly by.
”Potter, I can´t deny that I was surprised when Dubmledore told me about the will at christmas. And I have enjoyed many holidays without any disturbanse of students. But I loved Lily. I will do my best to care for you, her child. Even if it was unexpected.”
”You have known since christmas?” he asked and stared at Snape. ”Why didn´t I know until this morning?”
”Professor Dumbledore had to make inquries at the ministry and at the muggles social services. But yes, I have known and made preparations of your coming here. I had my objetions of the headmaster waiting until the last minute to tell you. But he wanted to be sure it could happen and not disturb your schooling. Snape fell silent and then added,
”Do you have any other questions?”
Harry thought for a moment.
”Do I have a bedtime? And what about other rules? And what will happen if I somehow accidentally break them?” he asked,
”I hope you´re not planing on breaking my rules, Potter”, said Snape. ”But if you do, you should know that I will never hit nor spank you. As punishment I will take away any privilges such as telly time or flying time for example.”
”Telly time? You have a telly?” Harry couldn´t help but ask.
”My father was a muggle Potter”, Snape said. ”And I find it an easy way to keep up with muggle news as well as occational entertainment.”
Harry could almost not belive his luck.
”As for bedtime and other rules. You should be in bed by 10 pm. Non negotiable. And I want you to tell me if you are leaving the grounds and go outside the gate. I also expect you to be on time for every meal, to treat the house elves with respect, take responsability for your owl and your schoolwork and keep your room fairly tidied up.
”I can do that”,Harry said.
”Wonderful”, Snape said and Harry could almost feel the professor wanting to roll his eyes.
”Now Potter, if you are done eating I will show you around the manor and the grounds.”
They exited the large entrance doors and took a right turn. Professor Snape gestured to the fountain and the aisle of chestnut.
”The animals almost never comes here in the front, exept for the birds.”
”Animals?” Harry asked.
”In the wooded part of the grounds I keep a herd of albino fallow deer. And there are also wild rabbits and the occational jarvey.”
Harry didn´t know what to say. Everything was so different from what he expeced. Snape showed him the herb garden and told him they needed to weed it over summer. They passed the green house and the fruit garden. Harry spotted an open green area and a wooded part further away. They then reached the entrance doors from the other side.
”You have a really big garden” Harry finally said.
”Observant as always Potter”, Snape snorted. ”You are free to roam the grounds as you like. But, respect the wild life and you will gain their trust”, said Snape as they entered the foyer.
”In here”, said Snape and pionted to the doors to the left, ”is the chess room. There is a fireplace connected to the floo, and a small relaxing area with a chess board.” Snape pointed to the next door. It was just to the left of the large stairs.
”This goes to my potions lab in the cellar”, said Snape, ”Don´t go down there unless I invite you.”
Harry nodded. He had enough of potions in school anyway.
”The next room, is as you know, the dining room. From there you can reach the kitchens and the laundry rooms. Although the elves are taking care of all that. This door goes to a bathroom.”
Harry stifled a yawn and tried to look awake. Snape saw it of course.
”Let me show you the last of upstairs, then I belive it is time for you to go to bed.”
They went upstairs and Snape pointed to the first door to the right,
”This is my study. Don´t go in there unless I give you permission. Next here is the living room and it is connected to the library. You are free to read what you want, but please don´t make a mess out of my set-up.”
”I wont sir”, said Harry.
Snape looked at the sleepy eleven year old.
”Now, go brush you teeth, Potter, and go to bed. Breakfast will be served at 8.30. Good night.”
”Good night sir”, said Harry and went to get ready for bed. This was a wierd day.
Quirrel unwrapped his turban and turned around. A horrible snake like face stared at Harry. His scar hurt and he tried to scream, only no sound came out. Suddenly there was a green flash and a woman screaming.
Harry woke up shaking and tears streaming down his cheeks. He was sweating and felt slightly out of breath. He thought maybe his crying had woken him up. With a sudden realisation he knew something else was wrong. He reached down and felt his pyjama pants. They were wet. Harry felt a chill of horror down his spine. This could not be happening. He had wet the bed in professor Snapes house. He had wet his bed like a baby the first night in his new home. He felt his bottom becoming a little cold and he didn´t like the feeling of the wet pyjamas sticking to his bum. He thought about what his options were. Either find the house elves, but it was the middle of the night and he didn´t know what they looked like. Or try to deal with it himself or tell Snape. Telling Snape was the least appealing alternative, but he wasn´t aloud to do magic out of school. And even if he was, he didn´t know any cleaning spells. Harry tried to hold back the tears from the nightmare and climbed out of bed. He was planning to try to clean himself up before telling Snape, when he saw the professor standing in the hallway. He was dressed in a dark green pyamas and a black dressing gown.
”Potter, I heard screaming, Are you alright?”
Harry couldn´t answer. He tried to pull his t-shirt down to cover his wet crotch. He looked at the floor and willed the tears to stay put in his eyes. Snape of course saw the action and knew what had happened. He had after all been head of house for many years and was not entirely unfamiliar of the concept of the occational wet bed.
”Potter”, he said.
Harry didn´t answer.
”Potter”, Snape repeated. ”Harry”, he said and lifted Harrys chin. ”It´s alright.”
Harry felt tears fall from his cheeks.
”I´m sorry”, he whispered. ”I had a nightmare. I didn't mean to wake you up.”
Snape put his hands on Harrys shoulders and pulled him to his chest.
”How about you take a quick shower, and I will take care of the sheets. And then we will have a glass of warm milk. Okay?”
Harry nodded and made a turn for the bathroom.
”Put your wet pyjamas in the basket and the elves will take care of it”, said Snape who had followed Harry in to the bathroom. ”There are fresh towels in the cabinet over here”, he said.
Snape exited the bathroom and Harry pulled of the wet pyjamas and got in to the shower. He heard someone coming in and getting out. When he was done and drying himself off he noticed Snape had put a clean pyjamas and boxers on a chair. As he got out of the bathroom he met Snape coming up the stairs with two glasses of warm milk on a tray.
”Lets sit down in the living room”, he said.
Harry followed the man in to the living room and sat down on the edge of a couch. Snape handed him a glass and sat down next to him. Not to close and not to far away, He turned to face him.
”Do you want to tell me about your nightmare?” he asked.
Harry took a sip of milk.
”I dreamed about Quirrel and Voldemort. They wanted to kill me. My scar hurted and then I heard a woman screaming”, Harry said in a low voice.
Snape set down his glass on the coffee table and looked at Harry.
”I can't say it was only a bad dream. Because I know it wasn´t. But Quirrel is gone now, and you don´t have to worry about him.”
”What about Voldemort?” Harry said and looked to his feet.
”Harry, you are only eleven years old”, Snape said. ”No one expects you to face him alone. Or at all. As I said at dinner. I will be here for you. Understood?”
”Yes sir”, Harry said and took a sip of milk. It felt better now. Even if he was embarrassed about his accident. Only little kids wet their bed.
”Harry, I think we could skip the formalities when we are at home”, Snape said. ”You don´t have to call me sir here, Once when we go back to Hogwarts that will have to be reinstated. But at home you may call me Severus.”
”Severus”, Harry tried. ”That´s gonna´ be weird.”
”Well yes, but now I am your guardian and not your teacher. Although I will very much appreciate if you did well in potions from now on”, said Severus and winked at Harry.
”I will do my best prof...er Severus”, smiled Harry.
”Sure you will”, smiled Severus. ”Now Harry it´s time for you to return to bed. Do you think you can go back to sleep?”
”Yeah”, said Harry. ”It´s fine”
”Leave the glass here on the table and the elves will take care of it”, said Snape. He followed Harry into his room and pulled the covers over him once Harry had climbed into bed for the second time that night.
”Sleep tight Harry” he wispered.
Harry was amost alseep and could only answer with a murmur. Snape left the light on in the hallway and slipped in his own bedroom for a few hours of much needed sleep before morning.
Chapter 2: First day at Spinners End
I know this chapter is super short. But I promise I will make it up to you in the next one.
Harry woke up from a knock on the door.
"Are you planning to sleep away all day?" He heard Snape say.
Harry flew up from the bed.
"I'm sorry sir. I overslept."
"No matter", said Snape. "I figured you could use a bit of a lie in since you were up last night. Breakfast is in 10 minutes.
The man disappeared from the door and Harry groaned. He had been up at night. It all came back to him. The nightmare, the wet bed. He had been crying. He felt his cheeks redden and he hoped this had been a onetime thing. He didn't want to think about it ever again.
Harry made his way down to the dining room where Snape was sat at the table reading the Daily Prophet. He didn't look up from the paper as Harry sat down. Harry put some jam on a toast and poured himself some tea. After a while Snape laid down his paper.
"What are your plans for today Harry?" He asked.
"Well... Would it be alright if I went flying for a while?"
"By all means", Snape said. " But be sure to pay attention to the wards. You can't go higher than 60 feet or you will feel a small discomfort. And please, none of that daredevil flying I usually have to witness on the quidditch pitch at Hogwarts."
"I won't sir", Harry said,
"Harry, we talked about this last night remember? At home it is alright to call me Severus."
"I remember now", Harry said quietly.
"Good", said Snape. "Maybe after your flying you could take a look at your homework for the summer. It will not do to postpone it until last minute."
After Harry assured Snape that he would start on his homework that afternoon he collected his Nimbus from his room and headed for the garden. It was an amazing feeling to be flying again. He felt the wind against his face and it was like all troubles from the past were gone. Snape was watching the boy from the herb garden and frowned when he saw him doing a few loops in the air. Sure the kid could fly, but he didn't want to have to explain to Dumbledore how he only managed to keep the boy alive for one day. But Snape could understand Harry's need to blow of some steam and be alone and think for a while. After a few hours Snape took out his wand and cast a tempus charm. It was almost time for lunch but he couldn't see Harry anywhere. He walked closer to the field and saw the boy in the edge of the woods. He was squatting and petting one of the wild rabbits. Like he felt Snape's eyes on him he arose and turned around. Snape gestured to his stomach to let Harry know it was time for lunch.
The elves had prepared a wonderful meal and Harry ate with a speed of lightning. Spending a few hours flying certainly build up your appetite.
"Take it slow kid, no one is going to take the food of your plate", said Snape and a second later frowned. That was probably what the kid was used to with his relatives. Harry's cheeks blushed a little and he willed himself to slow down.
"I'm going to spend the afternoon brewing, Harry", said Snape. "I trust you to not destroy the house in the meantime."
"No, I was gonna do my charms essay", said Harry.
"Very well", said Snape. "If you require inspiration, feel free to take a look in the library."
Harry had a pleasant afternoon despite doing his homework. Snape's library was much more interesting than his own books and he spend many hours just reading on the couch in the living room.
That's where Snape found him and told him it was time for dinner.
"But we just ate", Harry protested.
"Try again Harry", Snape said. "It's 6 a clock already.
Harry put the books back and followed Snape downstairs.
Later that night they sat in a comfortable silence watching the telly. Snape had watched the news and then asked Harry if there was anything in particular he wanted to watch. Harry had never chosen anything to watch on the telly, assuming his aunt and uncle even let him stay in the living room for the evening. He was overwhelmed with the possibilities and in the end chose some cartoons. Snape sighed inwardly but said nothing.
When it was 9.45 Snape turned of the telly.
"Go get ready for bed Harry", he said. "I will be there in a minute to say good night."
Harry went into the bathroom and brushed his teeth. He went to the toilet and tried to squeeze every single drop out to not have a repetition of the previous night. He changed into pyjamas and just as he crawled into bed Snape came into the room. He pulled the covers around Harry.
"Good night Harry", he said. "If you have another nightmare, it's perfectly fine to come and get me."
Harry thought he was going to die from embarrassment. He had hoped Snape had forgotten about everything.
"Thank you, but that will not be necessary", he said.
"Of course not", Snape smiled. "Good night Harry."
Voldemort laughed and came closer to Harry.
"You're just as stupid as your muggle mother. She could have lived if it weren't for you."
The snake like face came closer and Harry felt his breath on his face.
"Come with me and you can join them Harry. Come with me and meet your parents."
"No!" Harry screamed.
Voldemort laughed again. Quirrell raised his wand. There was a green light. His scar hurt and he heard a woman screaming.
Harry woke up to Snape shaking him.
"Harry", he said. "You're only dreaming. It's a nightmare."
Snape was sitting on the edge of the bed. Harry looked at him through teary eyes.
"He talked about my parents ", he sobbed. "I'm the reason my mother died."
Harry tried to catch his breath but the crying took over.
"Hush Harry", said Snape and pulled Harry to his chest. He held him close and rocked him slightly from side to side. Snape knew there was nothing he could do but to wait out the crying. Harry leaned his head to his guardians chest. It smelled of potions and cinnamon. He rubbed his face on the mans soft dressing gown and it gave him a weird sense of comfort. He took a deep breath and when he finally calmed down Harry realised his pants were wet and a bit cold. He pulled the covers close to hide what he had done and he felt his cheeks redden. Couldn't he catch a break? Why must this happen to him of all people? He pulled away from Snape and stared down at his lap.
"Do you feel like you can go back to sleep now?" Asked Snape.
"I...I'm...wet", said Harry in a murmur.
"Sorry, I didn't catch that", said Snape and leaned closer.
"I had an accident", whispered Harry. He had never been more ashamed in his life.
"Oh, thats easily taken care of", said Snape and gave Harry a reassuring stroke on his cheek. "Come on, let's get you cleaned up."
When Harry came out of the shower, Snape had changed his sheets and dried the mattress. A fresh pair of boxers and a pyjamas laid on the bed. He put them on as Snape came in the room with some warm milk.
"Is this your recipe for nightmares?" Asked Harry with a small smile.
"This is what my mother gave to me when I'd had one", said Snape and handed him the glass. "It worked every time."
Harry drank the milk and then handed the glass back to Snape. He laid down in bed on his side facing the potions master.
"I'm sorry I'm such a mess", he whispered.
"No matter", said Snape and leaned down to give him a hug. "That's what I'm here for."
Harry took a deep breath and once again took comfort in the smell of potions from the mans gown.
"Good night kid", whispered Snape and patted Harry's bum lightly.
"Good night", Harry murmured back.
Chapter 3: Dreamless sleep and night time underwear
Thank you so much everyone who commented and sent kudos. That's what keeps me going.
The next morning after breakfast, Harry sat down in the library to finish his charms essay. This was the earliest he ever started with homework on a school break.
"I will be in the chess room Harry", said Snape. "I'm making a floo call."
Snape got into the chess room and put a locking charm and a silencing charm on the door. He threw some floo powder in the fire and kneeled before the hearth.
"Hogwarts hospital wing", he yelled. "Poppy, I need to talk to you."
"Severus?" the mediwitch answered. "Are you home already? I thought all professors stayed the week to finish up the last work you have with grading and all."
"Well yes, normally I would", said Snape. "But I have Harry now and I need to be home with him."
"Oh, that's right!" said Madame Pomfrey. "Albus told me about his arrangement. I'm so glad it finally happened. Is everything going alright?"
"That is actually what I wanted to talk to you about", said Snape. "Harry has suffered from nightmares both of the two nights we have been home."
"Well that's normal after a trauma", said Madame Pomfrey. "I wouldn't worry about it."
"No, but he has also had accidents during these nightmares", said Snape. "At least I think it's because of the nightmares. Is this something you know about the boy? Has he been wetting the bed during the school year?"
"Well no", said Madame Pomfrey. "The house elves informs me if there is a problem with wet sheets so I can diagnose the child to why it happened."
"But", Madame Pomfrey continued, "he had an accident the night he spent here after his encounter with Quirrell. The night before he went home. I took care of it before he woke up to not embarrass him. If you say he has been having accidents every night since, I assume it is his minds way of dealing with the trauma. Severus, I know you've studied psychology and pedagogics."
"You know that's required to teach at Hogwarts Poppy", said Snape a little irritated.
"Then you know about the concept of regression", said Madame Pomfrey.
"What are you saying?" asked Snape. "Potter is acting like a baby?"
"No, not on peruse of course", said Madame Pomfrey. "And not consciously. But his mind is dealing with trauma. It is not unusual for children to react this way in a crisis. You should probably be prepared for a very sensitive child right now."
Snape rolled his eyes. As if the Gryffindor wasn't sensitive as it was.
"If the bed wetting continues for a longer period of time", said Madame Pomfrey, "you should wake him up during the night to take him to the toilet. Severus, you should support him in every way. Maybe invest in some night time underwear?"
"Nappies you mean?" Snape said.
"Well yes", Madame Pomfrey continued. "But you should probably not call them that in front of the boy. I actually have a few packages here I can send through. But be careful when you approach him with them. They are for his self esteem, to not have to wake up in a wet bed. But they could as easily be considered juvenile. Ask him and let him decide for himself. And Severus, support him. You know the boy haven't had much of that."
Snape felt annoyed. She didn't need to tell him how to be a proper guardian. But he accepted the night time underwear she sent through.
After dinner that night, Harry was sitting in the living room watching telly. He revelled in watching as much telly he could, not being allowed to watch what he wanted, or at all at the Dursleys. Snape came into the room and sat down beside him.
"I was going to ask the house elves to make some tea before bed", he said. "Would you like any?"
"Could I maybe have coffee instead?" asked Harry.
He was planning on staying awake the whole night to avoid the nightmares and the horrible possibility of wetting the bed.
"Aren't you a little young for coffee?" asked Snape.
"Please Severus", Harry said and looked at him through innocent eyes. "I drink it all the time at Hogwarts."
"Fine", Snape agreed. "I take it you want milk and sugar?"
"Thank you", sighed Harry pleased as Snape went down to the kitchen.
Snape returned with a cup of tea for himself and the coffee for Harry. Harry took deep sips and tried not to make a face. He really didn't like coffee but was willing to try anything to stay awake. Snape cleared his throat.
"Harry", he said. "There is something I need to talk to you about."
"What?" asked Harry and sipped on his coffee.
"These nightmares you have. I know they are causing you distress."
"Yeah?", said Harry and drank from his cup.
"I know you don't like it but it is actually your minds way of dealing with everything that happened with Quirrell.
"Then my mind is stupid", mumbled Harry.
"Not at all, Harry", said Snape. "Your mind is helping you survive. Helping you heal. That's also why you've had night time accidents."
Harry froze. He wanted to disappear through a hole in the floor.
"I talked to Madame Pomfrey about it", Snape said. "You have absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about. This is normal for someone who is going through trauma."
"You what?!" asked Harry and stood up. "How could you?! I don't want anyone to know about this!"
"Harry", Snape said. "Calm down. She said there were ways to make this easier. She sent some night time underwear you could try."
"Oh hell no!" screamed Harry. "I can't believe you would tell her. Do you actually live to make my life hell?!"
"What's with the swear words?! asked Snape and stood up.
"If you can't behave properly mister grown-up, then go to your room!" he said sternly.
"I hate you!" screamed Harry and threw his cup on the floor. It broke, and pieces of china and coffee where everywhere. Harry stormed off and Snape heard him slam the door shut to his room.
"Merlin save me from overdramatic children", Snape said to himself. He sat back down on the couch, leaned his head back and closed his eyes. This had not gone well.
At 1.30 in the morning, Severus went to go to bed. He passed Harry's room to check on him. He had heard Harry a few hours ago, go to the bathroom and brush his teeth but didn't came to say good night. Severus assumed he was still furious with him.
Surprisingly the light in Harry's room was on. He opened the door and found Harry sitting on his bed against the headboard. Hugging a pillow and his knees drawn to his chest.
"I thought I made myself clear concerning your bedtime", Snape said and came in to the room and sat down on the bed. "Why are you up mister?"
Harry's eyes where puffy and red from crying and his cheeks had dried tears on them.
"I couldn't sleep", he said with a raspy voice.
Well that's what happen when you have coffee right before bed", Snape said.
"That was kind of the point", mumbled Harry.
"What?" Snape asked. "You were trying to stay awake?"
Harry looked up at him.
"I don't want to dream. And I don't want to have accidents."
Harry stifled a sob and Snape stroked his cheek.
"I'm sorry I yelled at you before.", he said.
"I'm sorry to", said Harry. "You can take money from my vault in Gringotts to pay for the cup I broke."
"That won't be necessary. I have way to many cups in this house anyway."
Harry gave a small smile and then sighed.
"I hate the dreams", he said.
"Well I can give you a dreamless sleep potion for tonight since your little coffee stunt is keeping you awake", said Snape. "But this is a onetime thing Harry. Dreamless sleep is highly addictive. And besides, your mind need these dreams to heal."
"I'll be right back", Snape said and went to get the potion. Before he exited the room he turned around and looked at the child holding the pillow tight to his chest. He thought for a second and then went into his study. There on the top shelf was his old lamb. A stuffed animal his mother gave him when he was a child. He contemplated wether Harry would take it or not, but then thought of the kid hugging that pillow, and he put the lamb in his pocket.
Snape entered Harry's room with a small vial in one hand and a glass of water in the other.
"Here", he said and handed Harry the vial.
Harry downed it in one go.
"Yuck!" he said and made a face.
He handed the vial back to Snape and accepted gratefully the water and took a sip.
"Yes, dreamless sleep is not the best tasting potion", said Snape and placed the glass on the bed side table once Harry had taken a few sips.
"Feeling sleepy?" Snape asked as Harry laid down in bed. His eyes shuttered and he made a motion to pull the pillow to his chest.
"I brought you something", said Snape carefully. Not wanting to upset the boy again. He took the lamb from his pocket and laid it beside Harry.
"She was mine when I was a kid", he said. "I thought maybe she could keep you company at night."
Harry was to tired to protest.
"What's her name?" he yawned.
Snape smiled. Kids where to predictable sometimes.
"I called her Mimi", he said.
"Mimi", Harry said. "I like it."
He pulled the stuffed animal to his face and inhaled her scent. She smelled just like Severus. Potions and cinnamon. He felt safe to go to sleep now. Snape pulled the covers around him and stroked Harry's hair.
"Good night kid", he whispered and exited the room.
Harry was already asleep, his nose in the lambs soft wool.
Next morning Harry felt like he had been sleeping for several years. He was happy to note his pyjama pants were dry. Although since he didn't wet the bed, his bladder was rather full and he had to run to the bathroom to make it. He lost a small spurt in his boxers but he was relieved to see it wasn't noticeable from the outside. Once he was done peeing he was fully awake and realised he had Mimi under his arm. He washed his hands and then grabbed her to put in his bed before heading down to breakfast. When he got out of the bathroom he literally ran into Snape.
"Well good morning little hurricane", Snape said. "Slept well I guess?"
"Em...yes", said Harry and tried to hide Mimi behind his back. He didn't think it was necessary for Snape to know he had actually slept with the lamb all night.
"Go change from pyjamas Harry and we'll have breakfast in a minute", Snape said.
Harry hurried into his room to hide Mimi under his pillow. And changed from pyjamas to jeans and a t-shirt.
They had a pleasant day outside. Harry helped Severus weed the herb garden before lunch. And Severus took advantage of it and sneaked in some teaching about the herbs and its area of use.
The afternoon was spent flying for Harry and brewing for Snape.
When it was approaching Harry's bedtime that night, Snape caught him looking quite anxious. When he rose from the couch for the fourth time Snape couldn't hold back.
"Are you not well Harry? This is the fourth time you leave for the bathroom."
Harry sat back down.
"Well, I'm feeling a little odd", he said. "Maybe I should take dreamless sleep again tonight?"
"Ah, so that's what this is about", Snape said. "You heard what I said last night Harry. Last night was a one time only. Maybe if you read something light before bed?"
"Fine", said Harry and went to brush his teeth.
Snape came in to say good night a moment later. He sat down on the edge of the bed.
"You can read for 15 minutes. Then I want you to try to go to sleep", he said. "Have you been to the toilet?"
"Yes", said Harry and rolled his eyes.
"Good night then", said Snape and rose from the bed.
"Night", said Harry and opened the book.
Once Snape had exited the room, he pulled Mimi from under his pillow and held her close while he was reading.
Quirrell raised his wand. Through the door came the queen chess piece. She glided over the floor and stared at him. From the other side a troll came forward. The smell was terrible. In his head he heard Voldemort laughing.
"You don't stand a chance Harry. Surrender and come with me. You're going to die anyway. Die like your worthless mudblood mother."
Quirrell cast a soundless spell and everything was green. He heard a woman screaming.
Harry woke up crying. What was worse was he felt his pyjama pants growing warm and wet. He tried but couldn't stop the stream. He sobbed and sat up and felt the pee wet his bum and he spread his legs a little. When he was done he looked unsure at the door. Why hadn't Snape come? Hadn't he heard him cry? Harry grabbed Mimi and climbed out of bed. Snape had said not to go in his room unless it was an emergency. Harry thought this absolutely counted as that.
He hesitated before he knocked on his guardians door.
"Harry?" said Snape from the inside.
Harry could hear the man had been asleep. The door opened.
"Are you alright?" asked Snape.
"No, I had a nightmare", said Harry.
Snape took in the sight before him. Harry had clearly wet himself and been crying, and he held the stuffed animal close to his chest. It was heartbreaking.
"Come on", said Snape. Let's get you changed.
Harry set Mimi on the toilet seat as he was in the shower. When he got out Snape had taken care of his bed.
"I don't want to sleep more tonight", said Harry and held his towel around his shoulders.
"Harry, it's only 2 am. It's the middle of the night", said Snape.
"I know but I hate dreaming. Can't you stay with me?"
This came as a surprise to Snape. The boy actually found him comforting.
"Your bed is way to small for the two of us", he said. "But if you want, you can sleep in my room."
"No, what if I wet your bed?" said Harry and shuddered at the thought.
"You won't if you wear the night time underwear", said Snape.
Harry thought about it for a moment. Maybe it was worth it.
"Fine", he finally said.
Snape raised his wand.
"Accio Harry's night time underwear", he said and soon a package game flying through the air.
Snape pulled one out and handed to Harry who slipped it on before putting on his fresh pyjamas. It was a weird feeling having something so thick between his legs. But it was soft and not at all uncomfortable. Snape held out his hand for Harry to take and led the boy into his bedroom.
"Wait!" said Harry suddenly.
"What is it now?" asked Snape.
"Can I bring Mimi?"
"Sure, go get her", sighed Snape.
Harry ran into the bathroom to collect her and then got back into Snape's bedroom.
He crawled into bed and laid down next to Snape, facing the man. He held Mimi close to his face stroking his cheek against her soft wool and inhaling the safe smell. Snape stroked circles on Harry's back soothingly and Harry was soon lulled to sleep.
Chapter 4: Being sick
Harry has the flue.
I'm sorry it took me so long to upload this chapter. I've been away from home for a few days and the Internet was not my friend :(
Harry woke up and it took a while for him to figure out where he was. He turned to his left and saw Severus sleeping beside him. He turned his head the other way to look at the watch on the bed side table. It was 6 am. Harry became aware of a headache and a sore throat and decided to go to the bathroom to have some water. He didn't want to wake his guardian so he tried to be as quiet as possible. His night time underwear made a rustling sound but is wasn't enough to wake the man up.
Harry drank some water and went to the toilet. He felt warm and took of his pyjama pants. It was way to hot to wear them. Harry looked around but could not find anywhere to throw away his pull up so he decided to just keep it on. It was dry anyway.
He felt a little better when he drank the water but still was quite nauseated and didn't want to go back to sleep. He sneaked into Snape's bedroom and got Mimi and then went into the living room and turned on the telly. That's where Snape found him a few hours later.
Snape had woken up to an empty bed. He grabbed his dressing gown and checked the bathroom only to find Harry's pyjama pants on the floor. He thought maybe the kid had had an accident but the pants were dry. He folded them and placed them on Harry's bed. Once he checked the living room, he found Harry asleep on the couch. Holding the stuffed animal close, and thumb in his mouth and wearing only a t-shirt and the pull up. He placed two fingers inside to check if it was wet. He was pleased to find it was not. Good thing the kid hadn't had a nightmare at least, but when Snape looked closer at the boy, he did look ill. He was sweaty on his forehead and neck, and yet he was shaking like he was freezing. Snape cast a temperature checking charm.
"Great", he muttered. The kid had a fever. He placed a blanket around Harry and went to get a fever reducing potion and a pain relieving potion as well as some water.
When Snape returned he sat down on the edge of the couch beside Harry and stroked the boys back to wake him up. Harry's eyelashes shuddered and he opened his eyes. When he saw Snape he tried to hide his wet thumb behind Mimi. But Snape said nothing. He just helped Harry to sit up and handed him the first small vial.
"Drink this", he said. "You have a fever and most probably the flue."
"My throat and head hurts", said Harry with a small whine and looked up at him with big green eyes.
"I know kiddo", said Snape. "Drink this and most of the pain will go away." Snape handed him the second vial and then the water. He couldn't help but notice how young and innocent the boy looked with Mimi under his arm. He was pleased yet surprised the boy had accepted the lamb. Once Harry had finished the water he leaned against Snape. He held Mimi close to his face and after a while Snape heard his breathing even out. Harry had fallen asleep with his head on Snape's arm.
Severus reached for his wand to change the channel on the telly. Kids cartoons wasn't his idea of a pleasant morning. He settled for a documentary about physics instead.
Harry whimpered and started fidgeting. Severus put his arms under Harry's armpits and placed the boy in his lap. Face against his chest and legs on either sides of his lap. He rubbed Harry's back and guided Harry's thumb to his mouth.
Harry half opened his eyes sleepily and felt Snape patting his bum lightly. He went back to sleep with the comfort of Snape's smell close to him.
After a while Severus heard Harry give a whine and a small sob. He heard a small hissing sound and felt Harry's bottom become a little warm. Severus shook the boy.
"Wake up Harry", he whispered. "Let's go to the toilet."
He set down Harry on the floor and took his hand to lead him to the bathroom, but they had only taken a few steps when Harry froze. He had tried so hard to hold it. But it was hard to stop the stream. He lost a spurt and then felt his night time underwear grow warm and wet and he spread his legs as it got padded out. He looked down and heard the hissing sound. He was so ashamed. He peed himself and he wasn't even sleeping. Harry felt tears stream down his cheeks in embarrassment as he finished his wee. Severus squatted before him.
"Hey", he said. "It's no big deal. You're sick and have just been asleep."
"I didn't mean to...", sobbed Harry.
"Sch... I know", said Snape and picked him up. He held him with one arm under his bum and stroked circles on his back with the other as he carried the kid to the bathroom.
Snape helped Harry off with the wet pull up and vanished it into thin air.
"I know you don't feel well Harry", Snape said. "Do you have the energy to shower or do you want me to cast a quick cleaning spell?"
"I want to shower", Harry said. He felt miserable and wanted to stay in the shower forever.
Harry got out of the shower after 20 minutes and dried himself off with a towel.
"I don't need to wear one now", Harry said tryingly when Snape handed him a pull up. "I'm not gonna sleep."
"Put it on Harry", Snape said.
"But Severus..." Harry whined.
"Quit it Harry", said Snape with a stern voice. "Do as you're told please."
Snape held out the night time underwear for Harry to step in. Harry steadied himself on Snape's shoulder as Snape pulled it up. Harry had never felt so small in his whole life, but in a way it felt comforting. Snape handed him a t-shirt and pyjama bottoms.
"Go lay down on the couch, Harry", Snape said. "I'll bring you some soup."
"I'm not hungry", Harry said stubbornly.
"Maybe not", said Snape. "But you need to eat something nevertheless."
When Severus returned with the soup he found Harry on the couch. He was watching the telly and sucking his thumb. Snape set the bowls of soup on the table and Harry looked defiant at him behind his thumb.
"It's only because I'm sick", he said lisping slightly.
Snape raised his eyebrows.
"I didn't say anything", he said and looked amused.
"But let go of it now please and have some soup", he said and handed the spoon to Harry.
Harry scooted closer to the edge and took hold of the spoon. After a few mouthfuls he laid it back down.
"I'm full", he said.
"You're not", Snape answered and looked at the bowl. "A few more please."
Harry sighed but ate some more. He then laid down the spoon once more and leaned back on the couch. He glanced at Severus before putting his thumb back in his mouth and held Mimi close to his chest. Snape sighed but called for a house elf to take the bowls away.
The next time Severus glances at Harry, the boy had fallen asleep. Poor kid, he thought. He remembered what is was like when he had had the flue as a kid.
Severus got up and went into the library. He felt his brain was in need of something else than telly. While he was looking in the astronomy section he heard Harry get up from the couch and run into the bathroom. He heard Harry retch and throw up. He then heard crying and went after the kid to comfort him. Severus rubbed Harry's back as he was sat in front of the toilet vomiting. Once he was finished, Severus flushed the toilet and closed the lid. He sat down on the lid and placed Harry in his lap. Harry leaned his head on Snape's chest and Severus drew his fingers through Harry's unruly hair. Harry took a deep breath and let the familiar smell of potions and cinnamon comfort him.
"Harry", Snape whispered in his ear. "Do you need to go to the toilet since we're in here?"
Harry nodded and Snape left to give the boy some privacy.
When Harry came into the living room, Snape was sat on the couch reading.
"May I watch some telly?" Harry asked.
"Like you've done anything else all day", said Snape and rolled his eyes. "But fine, since you're not feeling well."
Harry threw himself on the couch and held Mimi loosely under his arm with the other arm supporting his neck as he watched the telly.
"How is that fever coming?" Severus asked.
Harry shrugged but did not answer. Snape sighed and returned to his reading.
Later that evening, Severus turned off the telly.
"Go brush your teeth Harry", he said. "It's time for bed."
"No", Harry whined. "I'm not sleepy."
"Be that as it may", Snape said. "But you need to sleep to get better. Go brush your teeth now and you can sleep in my room if you want to."
"Nah, I'm okay in my own room", Harry said and grabbed Mimi and headed of to the bathroom.
Severus came in to say good night later.
"Have you been to the toilet?" he asked.
"Yes", Harry said and rolled his eyes.
"Do you have your night time underwear on?"
Harry didn't answer but pulled up his t-shirt to show him the nappy. The elastic coming up above the pyjamas.
"Good job", Snape said and pulled the covers over Harry. "Good night kiddo."
In the middle of the night Harry woke up. He felt weird and wondered what had awoken him. He hadn't had a nightmare. He felt the nappy, but it was dry. He felt dizzy and his throat hurt. He didn't stop to think, but just grabbed Mimi and crawled out of bed. He entered Severus bedroom and climbed into bed beside him. Harry pressed his face to the mans chest and felt safe. Soon he was asleep with his thumb between his lips.
Severus woke up to his door opening. He heard Harry climb into bed and then lay down close to his chest. Severus felt Harry's cold feet on his legs and he held the kid close. Being a guardian was exhausting but oh so rewarding.
Chapter 5: Flying and fighting
Harry decides he is well from the flue. Snape disagrees.
Thank you so much everyone who commented and sent kudos. You guys are the best!
That night Harry didn't suffer from any nightmares. He woke up in the early morning a little embarrassed that he had sought the comfort in his guardian earlier that night. He felt much better than the day before. The dizziness and the sore throat was nearly gone.
He grabbed Mimi under his arm and climbed out of bed. The house was all quiet. He thought to himself the house elves must still be sleeping.
Harry sneaked out in the hallway and into the living room. He didn't dare turn on the telly in case it would wake up Snape. He stood by a window and looked out. The sky was all clear and the sun was slowly rising. It would be a beautiful morning for some flying he thought.
Maybe if he just slipped out for a minute. Harry didn't think asking Snape would be a good idea. The man would probably not appreciate being woken up at this early hour.
Harry hurried in to his room, threw Mimi on the bed and changed into jeans and a sweatshirt . He still didn't know what to do about the used nappy, even though it was dry, so he just put it on the bed hoping the house elves would take care of it later. He grabbed his broom and headed downstairs and out of the main entrance.
The air was fresh on his face after being cooped up all day yesterday. It was only a little cold and he took deep breaths and smelled the grass and the fragrances from the different flowers around the fountain.
Harry hopped on to his Nimbus and flew around the manor heading for the meadow behind the green house. It was an amazing feeling of freedom. Harry did a few loops high in the air and then a ventured dive. He raised the broom handle just in time to prevent him from hitting the ground.
Oh, how he loved this! He was to lost in flying to notice neither the time passing nor the potions professor getting closer to the meadow. He was to caught up in a no-hands spiral shaped dive to see the mans angry face.
"Harry James Potter!" Snape shouted. "What in the world do you think you are doing?"
Harry returned to the ground and walked up to Snape.
"Haven't you got any sense of safety at all?!" Snape continued. He was so angry Harry almost expected smoke to come out of his nostrils.
"What?" He asked. "I fly like this all the time at Hogwarts."
"Well I like my ward to be alive thank you," said Snape. "And besides, you have just been ill. How could you be so ignorant to go flying? Do you have some kind of death wish?"
Harry looked at his feet. He didn't like being yelled at.
"I feel much better now," he murmured.
"Speak up Potter," Snape said. "I will not have you mumble like an imbecile."
"I said I feel much better now," said Harry louder.
"Ah," Snape rolled his eyes. "I forgot you are a trained healer and can make those kind of evaluations yourself."
Harry felt tears starting to press behind his eyes.
"I just wanted to fly for a minute," he whispered.
"Spare me the tears mr Potter," Snape said. "I'm not falling for that."
Harry felt anger build up inside his chest.
"I'm not trying to make you fall for anything!" He shouted. "But you can't tell me what to do."
"You're so much like your father." Snape growled. "Just as arrogant and foolhardy."
"Don't talk about him like that!" Harry screamed. "You're just my guardian. You're not even my real parent! You've never cared what I do or where I am. Don't pretend you do now! I know you really hate me!"
Harry threw his broom on the ground and fled. He ran all the way up to his bedroom and threw himself on the bed. He drew Mimi to his chest and let the tears finally fall.
This was so unfair. Snape had been really decent to him these past days. He had even thought the man maybe liked having him around. Obviously that wasn't the case.
He wondered what his punishment would be. Snape had said he'd never spank nor hit him. But he didn't say anything about withholding food. That had been aunt Petunias favourite punishment. Just at that thought, he heard his stomach make a loud noise. It was way past breakfast time.
Severus pressed his hands to his face and sighed. What a terrible start to the day. He had woken up to an empty bed and had gone to look for the kid. He thought maybe he was in the bathroom being sick, flue and all. But the bathroom and the rest of the manor was empty.
He called for Harry multiple times but without receiving an answer. When he saw Harry flying he had almost had a heart attack. What in the name of Salazar did the kid think he was doing? Hadn't he been sick just yesterday?
He felt terrified. What if Harry fell of his broom? Hadn't he complained about being dizzy not that many hours ago? Snape returned to the manor. He knew he had to talk to his ward. He just needed to calm himself down first. Maybe they both did.
After half an hour Harry heard knocking on his door. He buried his face in Mimi's wool and willed Snape to go away. There was a second knocking.
"Harry?" Snape said and opened the door slowly.
"Go away," Harry cried silently.
"Harry, may I please come in?" Asked Snape softly.
Harry pulled the pillow over his head and held Mimi close. Snape came inside the room and sat down on the bed.
"I wasn't too pleased finding you outside this morning," he said.
Harry almost snorted. That's the least you could say.
"You gave me a terrible fright," Snape continued. "You were being very irresponsible Harry. What were you thinking?"
"I just wanted to fly," Harry said quietly from under the pillow. "I didn't know you were gonna get angry."
"It's not about me getting angry," Snape sighed. "You are not well enough from the flue to fly. And you know I don't appreciate the way you endanger yourself. You fly like a tempest sometimes. I don't want you to get hurt."
"No one cares about that," Harry said. "Wether or not I hurt my self. I know you hate me."
"Stop saying that Harry," said Snape. "I don't hate you. For the record, I don't hate any student."
"And that's all I'll ever be," said Harry quietly.
"What's that?" Asked Snape.
"You said mr Potter," said Harry and looked up from under the pillow with teary eyes. "You said before we should skip the formalities when we are at your home."
"Our home Harry. And I said mr Potter because I was upset with you," said Snape. "That doesn't change the way I feel about that."
Harry wiped his nose on his sleeve.
"I'm sorry I was bad," he said.
Snape stroked Harry's back.
"You weren't bad," he said. "You did a bad thing, and there's the difference. But please refrain from that kind of stupidity in the future."
"I promise," Harry said, and rubbed his eyes with his fists.
"Now," Snape said. "Please drink this. He pulled a small vial from the inside of his robe. "It's a stomach calming draught."
Harry reached for it and Snape helped him to sit up properly. Once Harry gave the vial back he noticed a mug of warm milk sitting on the bed side table.
"Is that for me?" He asked.
"I figured you needed something in that tummy of yours," Snape said. "And you need to be careful with eating since you've been sick to your stomach."
He reached for the mug and held it out to Harry. Harry took small sips and it tasted like heaven.
"I put some cinnamon in it. Figured you could handle it," said Snape.
Once Harry was done drinking he took the mug back and placed it beside the bed.
"How about you rest for a while?" Snape asked. "I think you could do with a nap after this morning."
Harry shrugged and wiped his nose again on his sleeve.
"Please don't Harry," said Snape and handed him a handkerchief. Harry blew his nose and then begun changing out of his jeans and sweater.
Snape handed him a pyjamas from the wardrobe. On top was a fresh pull-up. Harry's cheeks reddened but he put it on nevertheless. He laid back and pulled Mimi close to his face. Snape bent down to give him a hug.
"Why don't you make good use of that thumb huh?" He whispered. "I'll come wake you up in time for lunch."
Snape rubbed Harry's back and patted his bum a few times before rising and exiting the room. Harry, thumb between his lips, fell asleep not even two seconds later.
Two hours later Snape went into the boy's room to wake him up. He stood and watched him for a moment. Harry looked so young and innocent with his thumb in his mouth and holding the lamb close.
Without his glasses he looked less like James and more like Lily. He reached down and shook Harry's shoulder lightly.
"Good morning sleepyhead," he said softly. "It's time to wake up now."
Harry opened his eyes slowly and let his thumb slip out of his mouth.
"What time is it?" He asked with a yawn.
"It's time for lunch," answered Snape. "Come on, let's get you dressed."
Harry climbed down from the bed as Snape grabbed a pair of boxers and a t-shirt from the wardrobe. Harry realised with horror that his night time underwear was soaked. He must have dreamed without waking up.
"Be right back," he said and hurried into the bathroom.
Snape watched Harry exit the room. He knew what that waddle meant. He grabbed the clothes and followed him.
As he entered the bathroom Harry had slipped out of his pyjama pants and looked unsure. Snape realised there was nowhere for the kid to throw away his nappies. He pulled out his wand and conjured a basket for waste.
"Put it in there Harry, and it will disappear," said Snape and pointed to the bin.
He turned around and pretended to fiddle with Harry's clothes to give the boy some privacy.
"Do you require a shower," he asked. "Or could you do with a cleaning charm? The lunch is at the table."
"Charm please," said Harry. A second later he felt a slight tingle over his bare bottom. Snape handed him the boxers and t-shirt.
"Your jeans are where you threw them," he said. "Put them on and come down to the dining room. The elves has prepared a lovely mushroom soup."
While they ate lunch Snape eyed Harry.
"You are banned from flying for a week since this morning," he said. "And no telly all day."
"I guess that's fair," said Harry and looked up at the man. "What else?"
"You will be helping me this afternoon weeding the last of the herb garden. If you feel well enough that is."
"I can do that," said Harry and drank some water.
When Harry was on his knees later sitting in the herb garden pulling weed from between the herbs, he felt a small pressure from his bladder. He glanced up at his guardian.
Snape gave him a stern look.
"Don't slacken Harry," he said.
"No sir," said Harry and pulled himself together. He surly could manage until he was finished.
After a while his hand snaked down to hold himself outside the jeans. Snape glanced over to his ward and saw him fidgeting from side to side. He could spot a potty dance anywhere. He had been a teacher and a head of house for quite a long time after all.
"Harry," he said. "Do you need to go to the toilet?"
Harry looked up surprised.
"No?" He said. He didn't want Snape to think he was a baby not able to hold it.
He concentrated hard and willed his pee to stay put in his bladder. He bounced slightly and that helped a bit to keep it in. He inhaled sharply as he lost a spurt in his boxers.
Harry glanced down but luckily it didn't show.
Snape rolled his eyes and looked at Harry's struggle.
"Harry," he said sternly. "Go now. You are way to old not to go to the toilet when you need to."
Harry stood up and hurried to the entrance door. Once he was in the great hallway he lost another spurt and he grabbed himself. It was no use.
He felt his boxers grow warm and wet as he leaked. Harry spread his legs in chock as he desperately held himself, only ending up peeing on his hands. He felt the wetness spread down the inside and front of his jeans.
He looked down. There was a puddle forming on the floor between his feet. He couldn't help feeling the relief in his bladder as well as the shame on his cheeks.
He had tried so hard to show Snape he was a grown up and only to end up peeing his pants like a toddler. Tears was forming behind his eyes and he choked a sob.
Snape decided to follow the kid inside. When he opened the doors he spotted his ward standing not 10 ft from the bathroom. He had spread his legs and looked to the floor. His jeans had a wet bottom and a puddle was forming on the ground.
He stood still for a second. He could just as well let the kid finish his wee. Snape then strode forward and placed a hand on Harry's shoulder and squatted before the kid.
"Hey," he said softly.
Tears fell from Harry's cheeks. He wanted to crawl into a hole and die.
"I...I'm...," he sobbed.
"Hush...calm yourself," Snape said and stroked Harry's cheek.
Harry's breathing begun to speed up and his crying became more intense. Snape flicked his wand and the puddle was gone. He stood up and held Harry close. The kid's face buried in his stomach.
Harry inhaled and let the smell of potions and cinnamon comfort him. His bottom was getting cold and the wet jeans was uncomfortable.
"How about we put you in a bath?" Asked Snape. He grabbed Harry's shoulder and steered him into the bathroom. He helped Harry of with the wet jeans and boxers.
"I'm going to put these in the laundry room straight away," Snape said. "Could you fill up the tub to a temperature of your liking please?"
Harry did as he was told and then waited as the tub filled. When Snape returned Harry pulled his shirt to cover his naked bum. Snape rolled his eyes.
"It's nothing I haven't seen before Harry," he said. "Undress please and get into the water."
10 minutes later Harry was relaxed to the point of almost sleeping in the bath. Snape came in after talking to the house elves about that nights dinner requests.
"Did you wash your hair?" He asked.
"I will," said Harry.
"Make sure you do," said Snape. "We will be getting a visit from the department of social work tomorrow. I would like you presentable."
"The what?" Asked Harry.
"From the ministry," Snape answered. "They want to see how you are."
Harry froze in the bath. He felt a chill of horror down his spine.
"Will they take me away?" He asked.
"No you silly child," Snape sighed. "They merely want to make sure you are doing alright here."
"Oh," Harry said relieved and then looked down in the water ashamed. "Are you gonna tell them about...you know.
"Your nightmares?" Asked Snape. "I see no need for that. Madame Pomfrey knows, and she seemed to think we could handle it between you and me ourselves."
"Right," said Harry and looked a little lighter.
"Take care of that hair now please," said Snape. "And dinner will be served in half an hour."
After dinner that night Harry was reading on his bed. He had picked a book from Snape's library called "Robin Hood, prince of thieves". On the front page it said "To my dear Severus, a prince for a prince. Love mom". Harry thought it felt weird to think of Snape as a kid.
Snape came in to say good night. He sat down on the bed beside Harry.
"Did you brush your teeth?" He asked. "And go to the toilet?"
"Yes and yes," Harry said.
"Very well," said Snape. "Put your pyjamas on then, and go to bed."
Snape got a pair of pyjamas out of the wardrobe and placed a pull-up on top.
"I already have my night time underwear on," said Harry and his cheeks reddened. "I didn't wanna forget, so I put it on before."
"Alright," said Snape and put the pull-up back.
Harry changed into pyjamas and was only a little embarrassed when he pulled down his jeans and revealed the night time underwear. He pulled up his pyjama pants in a hurry and climbed into bed.
"You may read for 15 more minutes," said Snape and handed him the book.
Harry took the book but didn't open it.
Snape sensed there was something Harry wanted to say so he stayed and folded Harry's clothes to wait the kid out.
"What are they gonna do tomorrow?" Harry finally asked.
Snape sat down on the bed.
"You don't have to be nervous", he said. "They are going to make sure I am a suitable guardian. Of course they did a checkup before I was approved. But they always make a visit once the kid has gotten in custody. Just to make sure."
"Yeah okay," Harry said and opened the book.
"Good night Harry," Snape said and pulled the covers around Harry. "I will check on you in 15 minutes and by then I want the lights to be out and you to be asleep."
"Mmkay," said Harry and turned a page.
"I'm serious Harry," said Snape and patted Harry's bums few times. "You need your sleep."
Snape rose from the bed and headed for the door.
"Good night Severus," said Harry.
Snape smiled and turned around.
"Good night kid," he said and closed the door.