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To know we're good enough

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To say that Maggie had a shitty day was the understatement of the year. Just this morning, she was actually excited when she got off the bed. A bit nervous for sure, but was so convinced of doing the right thing by putting that card in Eliza Wilkie's locker.

She had crushes before. The first had been her sitter who never complained and actually wanted to play with her. There was Mrs Laura in 8th grade. She had the longest brown hair and the greenest eyes she had ever seen. She was simply too gorgeous the the little town of Blue Springs. Always kind and willing to help. And there was her best friend Casey, with whom she played soccer with an entire summer before her family had to move.

But now, at 16 years old, Maggie thought that for once, it was possible that the girl she likes, would also likes her back. But boy, how she had been wrong. Eliza didn't just read the card with a half pity look and a disgusted smile but had chose to completely humiliated her by telling her friends about the invitation to the dance, who had then tell their not so close friends, which led to the whole school knowing about it. She was now outed to everyone except her family. And God, she did not want them to know. Not now. Maybe not ever.

No one had follow her after classes to make sure she was okay. It showed Maggie how delusional she was for thinking she had genuine friends, people looking out for her. They were all so stupid and jugdmental. She didn't want anything to do with them anymore. But fuck, she didn't wanted to feel this alone either.

Maggie slowed her aunt's triump down to the side of the road, rocks popping softly, soothing Maggie's ears a little bit, shutting off slightly the sound of their mean laughter. Kicking the stand on, she turned off the motor and pushed her keys deep in the pockets of her jeans jacket, keeping her hands there away from the small breeze.
Dragging her feet to the edge of the brigde, she noticed a pile of clothes on the ground. Jeans, boots, a white t-shirt and a leather jacket was forming a little mountain tooking Maggie by surprise. Looking around, she didn't see a living soul. Continuing her path, she stopped halfway the bridge, watching the sun gives it last rays of warmth.
The wind shutted down completely and what should have been a sereine scene was making Maggie suffocate .The sudden loud silence was overwhelming her. Leaning over the guardrail, she tried to keep her breathing steady. Closing her eyes only made it worse reseeing the crowd that had formed around Eliza's locker. A voice finally shook her out of her nightmare.

"I wouldn't jump if I were you."

Maggie turned around keeping her hand on the metal bar to balance herself. Right there stood a vision. A girl actually. A bit taller than her, young like her. Maggie was dumbstruck for a moment, taking it all in the stranger who had apparently just came out of the water. The sunset revealed the color of her jaw length hair. A reddish brown like an autumn leaf. Something warm was replacing the cold on Maggie's hands. Her fingertips were tingling with the desire to touch the tips of the stranger's wet hair.

"But again, I did jumped myself", said the girl with wit.

Maggie tilt her head, wondering if she had met her before. Her pale skin and her inquire brown eyes that were looking at her with a perfectly raised eyebrow and the start of a smile covering her thin lips. Surely she would have remembered her if they had met before.

"Are you alright Sawyer?" she asked teasingly and a tinge of worry in her voice.

Maggie finally moved, taking a step aside the rail crossing her arms and tipping her head back faintly, frowning.

"You know who I am?" she heard herself asking too loud.

Maggie tried not to stare at the girl, but she was now noting that the redhead was only wearing a muscle black tank top that seem too big for her but was now glued to her chest, showing her thin, long, strong arms. Dipplets of water was still falling down her wrist, to her veiny hands and slender fingers. Maggie instantly lifted her eyes, swallowing, when she saw the stringent boxers that were covering half her thights. The redhead was full on smirking before biting her lips.

"It hurts my feelings that you don't know I'm behind you in history, Maggie."

She was looking at her expectantly with big eyes. There was something in the way she said her name, like if she had imagined saying it a thousand times before. Maggie's whole body shivered at how good her name sounded out of the girl's mouth. Nodding three times, the redhead reached for her pants and put them on while she informed her:

"I'm Alex. Alex Danvers."

The name finally rang a bell that echoed loudly in the brunette's stomach.

"Wait, hold on," Maggie finally replied her hands in front of her, "The Alex Danvers? The one that led the basketball team to championship last year before I moved here? The one who actually won the International Science and Engineer Fair?"

A sad smile and a dark cloud covered her endless eyes. Alex simply nodded before stepping into her boots not even bothering tying the shoelaces. Maggie remembered now the story of the school's prodigy giving everything up, cutting her hair and outcasting herself when her father died in a plane crash. Not wanting to bring her back down the memory lane, Maggie changed the subject.

"Aren't you cold, Danvers?"

Alex finally smiled genuinely, her eyes shining brighter than the sun in August.

"I surf every morning at dawn, Sawyer. Cold is nothing new to me."

'God that girl was something else,' the brunette thought. Alex then took off her wet tank, twisting it to get the water out. Maggie bit her lips hard to not let her jaw fall on the floor. She did not expect her to be this ripped. She might have stop playing basketball but she was doing some kind of training for sure. She finally picked up her t-shirt and putted it over her head. Maggie looked at the water to her left, lingering, then returned her gaze to the redhead.

"Why did you jump, Alex?" she asked her voice suddently heavy.

She expected a reaction out of her but she only shrugged, her eyes flickering to the surface of the water.

"You never want the world to stop? Or at least want to stop existing for a moment and feel alive at the same time?" Alex rambled. "To shut down every feelings but also wish", she says pressing the word, "to feel something real?"

It amazed the brunette how changing Alex's eyes were and how they seemed to be so her. So broken, so complete. Like a repatched glass.

"Yeah", Maggie replied slowly, "I know the feeling. You ever ride a bike before, Danvers? It's where I get my freedom."

A flash of curiosity, clearly enticed at the idea, lit up her face, while she bent down to take her leather jacket. The brunette rushed to remove her jacket to slip off her sweatshirt. Handing it to the redhead, she put her coat back on.

"Come on, put it on", Maggie said smiling for the first time since the fiasco, "I'm gonna drive you home and I don't want you to freeze on the triump."
Biting back a smile, Alex putted the hoodie in place before swirling her leather jacket around and sliding her arms in easily.

"I'm more of a Ducati kind of girl, Sawyer but I'll accept the ride this time, okay?" She teased with a finger up pointing at me.

"Okay", breathed out Maggie silently not being able to look elsewhere.

The sun was now hiding away. The hundred bulbs on the bridge being the only source of light around them, the rest of the world seemed to have stopped, even just for a brief moment.


Alex hesitated between two things. Lifting her arms up in the air to feel the wind that was pushing Maggie's hair on her cheek. Or keeping her fingers safely tucked under the brunette's jacket on her hips. The skin there was so warm and soft, Alex couldn't stop smiling looking at the stars above her head. She chose the latter, recalling that she had wished for this moment the second Maggie Sawyer had crossed the doorstep of her biology class at the start of the year.

Alex met Maggie's eyes on the side mirror. The brunette seemed happy to have shared this with her. Alex was relieved to see her beautiful smile despite the awful event at school. She couldn't believe what Eliza had done. She's a popular girl but never showed any pettiness before. She never participated when Max and his football buddies were making fun of the freshmans. She had even apologize for their behavior once, when Alex had punched Mike right on the nose for calling her friend Winn names. But today, Eliza had acted cruelly and the redhead wanted to destroy the girl for making Maggie feel like she should be ashamed of herself.

Alex closed her eyes for a second trying to breathe and remember what her friend Sara had said during training with J'onn. She had started to go the DEO Club a few weeks after her dad's death. She had held so much anger in her, she had lost it in gym class one afternoon. J'onn, her teacher, was the one who had succeeded at calming her down. The tall man had then talked about the place he owned. A club, where a lot of people, kids and adults, came to lose their cool and tried to find a balance in themselves with diverse training. Alex and Sara had connected instantly, being both familiar with rage.

So, Alex focused on her surrounding, which was pretty much Maggie's smell. It was a mixture of fresh cutted woods and spices. She pulled the comfort link in her chest to undo the knot that had formed in her stomach. The redhead hid her proud smile behind the brunette's shoulder, sensing a rare, calm, honest wave of happiness flowing through her. She felt the Triump slowing down before coming to a full stop in front of her house. Both the girls could smell the ocean from the streets. Maggie turned off the engine and turn her head as much as she could with a smirk on her full lips.

"Home sweet home, Danvers."

Alex nudged the brunette's shoulder with her chin, a little sad that the ride was over. She feared that the second she gets off the bike, their sudden friendship, or whatever this was, would ends. And she wasn't ready for that. The redhead stood up, taking her time, her hands lingering on Maggie's back unnecessarily, pretending she needed support. Though it wasn't far from the truth.

Maggie's lung were full of the now cold air due to the fact she was holding her breath. Despite the weather, her neck was burning from Alex's thumb laying there between strands of hair while her fingers brushed against her collarbone. The tall girl finally swung her leg over the bike, her boot hitting the ground while her fingertips slid quickly down her arm.

"Thank you for driving me home, Sawyer", she said after clearing her throat, looking at the ground.

Maggie wondered why Alex was suddently unexpectedly shy.

"You didn't have to after the day you had"

The burden rushed to come sit down on her chest again. She had almost forgot the hell that was waiting for her the next day. But right now, all that matters was making Alex smile again. The brunette laid a hand on the girl's elbow making her lift her head instantly. Both girls couldn't help but smile the second their eyes met.

"Are you kidding?", Maggie replied with a scoff, "you were the best part of my day."

A blush crept up on her high pale cheeks, the girl biting her lips hard to not give in into the one too many smile that kept coming back. Alex didn't remembered the last time she had smiled that much in so little time. Maggie tilted her head toward the redhead's house, seeing the half open garage's door, noticing a green couch, Alex's surf board and a blue chevy pick-up.

''Though I don't get why you're not driving that truck sitting over there.''

The tall girl followed the brunette's gaze, a crinkle appearing between her eyes. Alex crossed her arms over her chest protectively, slightly shrugging, kicking her foot on the pavement.

"Yeah. It' was my dad's" Alex stuttered.

Soulful brown eyes flew to meet the redhead's, a soft comforting smile on her lips.

"For what it's worth, I'm sure he wouldn't want you to walk in the dark cold air",Maggie said before looking up the sky shortly thinking of something else,"well I'm pretty sure he wouldn't want you jumping off bridge either but..."

Alex let out a genuine laugh and Maggie took pride in that, beaming at her.

"You're probably right." Conceded Alex.

The brunette nodded three times not being able to shake off her dimples off her face.

"Damn right I am"

The taller girl finally dropped her arms before playing with the bike's handle with gentle fingers. She lifter her gaze from Maggie's cheek to her eyes, still not comprehending how someone can choose to hurt such a beautiful being.

"I'm really sorry for what happened today" she said with honesty.

It was Maggie's turn to close off a bit, shifting on her seat, clearing her throat.

"It wasn't your fault Danvers so..." she trailed off before Alex cut her off.

"I know that but I mean, I...kind of know what it feels like to lose a friend. A friend you likes... a that."

Alex was biting her lips, wide eyes, unsure of herself, but she just desperately wanted Maggie to know that she wasn't alone. Not like she had felt for the past year. The brunette lifted her head encouraging the tall girl to continue while she did her best to keep her tears at bay.

"The whole week after my dad's death, my best friend Vicky was there for me. Every single days and nights. She slept here" she says nodding at the second floor window of her house,"in my room, in my bed. And at the funeral, I was so piss at everyone you know...for offering their condoleances, as if they cared, as if I cared. I had lost a part of my world. The man who taught me to surf, to drive, the name of the stars, to look after my sister..." kept telling Alex with a barely controlled voice, ''everything that I am, before and after his death is because of him. And then he was gone. So that night, when Vicky crawled into bed with me. I couldn't hold back my feelings anymore. So I told her and I kissed her.''

Alex paused a moment looking over Maggie's shoulder as if she could see the scene in front of her.

"She had the decency of letting me down gently. She put it on grief and said we'd talk more about it the next day. But we just never spoke again and in one week, I had lost both of my best friend. So, I know it's not the same but, I get it."

Maggie's throat was dangerously tight. She didn't know if she wanted to cry for herself or for that girl in front of her she barely knew but chose to share this painful part of her life with her. For her. The brunette swallowed with difficulty before asking:

"How did you manage to cope with that?"

Alex let out a small scoff with a soft smile. She tipped her head toward Maggie.

"I have lots of anger issues since then and I joined Mr. Jonzz's club and it helped me a lot. I met other people like me there. Maybe you could come with me sometimes, or go see on your own or whatever..." rambled the redhead.

Maggie placed her hand on Alex's elbow calming her down.

"Relax Danvers. I'd love to check it out with you sometimes. I don't know if punching will be the solution for me but I'd love to see you train some times. "

Alex nodded and took a few steps back smirking slightly. Maggie didn't knew how she did it. Constantly going from shy and adorable to confident and sexy.

"So that means..." the redhead trailed on.

Maggie smiled once more not being able to stop herself.

"That means I'll see you tomorrow Danvers."

The redhead stopped moving in disbelief, not daring to blink wondering if she'll woke up to a world where Maggie Sawyer and her never spoke.

"Drive safely, Sawyer." Alex settled herself on saying with a light tone that she hoped ease down her genuineness.

The tall girl walked backward again toward the yellow house biting her lips as if she was stopping herself from saying more. She waved the brunette sweetly. Maggie smiled for the last time, copying her.

"You got it, Danvers."

Maggie's heart was still heavy and would probably be for a while. She was dreading going back to school the next day. She wanted to hide away. At least now she knew she had a friend who maybe would made it bearable for her. She didn't wanted to trust her so easily, so fast. But there was something about Alex's whole being that couldn't stop her from wanting to get closer. She didn't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing. All she knew is that she was scared as hell and that maybe, just maybe, Alex Danvers was worth it.