"You look ridiculous," Steve said.
"You have always looked ridiculous, no throwing stones," Tony replied.
"No, I looked patriotic."
"You look like a GI Joe doll right this very second."
"I'm suited to the stars and stripes."
Steve grasped Tony by the band of his uniform collar, lifting him one-handed until he stood on his toes.
"Director," he said pleasantly.
"Commander," Tony replied, with remarkable composure given his situation. "I thought this was a private meeting to divvy up who commands what around here."
"So did I, and then you showed up in the catsuit."
"This is a standard SHIELD uniform. I'm -- "
"Anything but a standard SHIELD catsuit-grunt."
"Hey, I'm not the one stalling against a diplomatic discussion of how we're going to run SHIELD."
"Are you sure?" Steve asked, walking him backwards towards the conference room table and the empty chairs surrounding it. "Because I think you knew exactly what would happen if you showed up in a skintight SHIELD uniform."
"I did figure you were getting tired of tailored suits," Tony replied, right before Steve shoved him into a chair.
"You thought you'd strut around in a tight uniform with some well-placed straps and my brain would go right out my ears," Steve said. He took a ziptie from a pouch at his hip, right above his sidearm holster, and threw it around Tony's wrist before the other man could pull away. It tightened with a hiss, trapping Tony's left wrist against the chair.
"This is much more fun than diplomacy," Tony pointed out.
"You know what they say," Steve said, grasping his other wrist. He cupped his hand around Tony's and brought it down between Tony's legs, holding it there until Tony got the message and kept his hand still when Steve released it. "Most of politics is masturbation."
"Do they?" Tony asked, arching up and towards Steve's lowered head.
"Here's how this is going to work," Steve replied, mouth half an inch from Tony's straining body. "I give you a little..." he kissed him, nipping his lower lip, "And you do whatever you need to do to convince yourself I gave you everything you wanted."
"You expected this," Tony accused, hips already jerking against his palm.
"When they called me the finest tactical mind of the century, it wasn't because they thought I was pretty," Steve answered, smiling against his lips.