It was not a night like any other in St. Canard. It was quiet. Too quiet.
This was not in a way of figure of speech even. Literally nothing was up. It was frustrating to the masked mallard.
This was Darkwing Duck’s third or fourth patrol around Main Street. There had been no sign of the nonsense that plagued the streets of St. Canard. Not a sighting from the Fearsome Five. Or any other miscellaneous villain of the week. Nothing foul and F.O.W.L was afoot.
“It just doesn’t add up, LP,” Darkwing remarked, spying into the same alleys as they zoomed past.
“Yeah, it’s quiet tonight,” Launchpad agreed, using his binoculars to keep on eye on the skies.
There was a pause.
Darkwing Duck was desperate for some direction, “still no messages from SHUSH, huh?”
”Nada, DW,” Launchpad answered.
Darkwing grunted, “have you tried calling them?”
“We’ve been on hold for the last hour on and off, DW,” Launchpad laughed, good-naturedly “maybe they all just went out to enjoy the long weekend. Imagine that?”
Hardly did Darkwing Duck or Launchpad take a vacation. Honestly, they could not afford to. There were no weekends off for justice, as it were. Nope, nights were for patrol. The weekend’s for even longer patrols. Not that Launchpad minded. They were needed and as long as he was out with DW - it was great.
“Yes, but when people are out, that’s when they get in trouble!” Darkwing continued, making another lap towards the suspension bridge.
Waving his phone, Launchpad laughed, “but when there’s no trouble, why call, DW?”
“This is no joking matter, LP,” Darkwing chastised him, speeding up a bit, “maybe the transmissions have been blocked by Megavolt!”
“But Gosalyn just called us to say goodnight earlier?”
“Maybe Bushroot has gunked up St. Canard’s powergrid with weeds again!”
As they crossed the bridge, Launchpad looked at all of St. Canard that was bright with city lights, “but, uh-”
“It’s just an example, Launchpad!” the masked mallard cut him off, “I’m... there can’t not be trouble.”
“Why d’ya say that?”
“It’s St. Canard.”
“I’d usually agree with ya,” Launchpad conceded, taking another scan over the horizon, “but there just ain’t anything tonight.”
They zoomed past a stream of people who were club and bar hopping through St. Canard that night. Launchpad laughed, “well, just not evil-doers.”
“Actually, I think I just saw Camille Chameleon in that crowd,” Darkwing corrected, triumphant, making a U-turn with the Ratcatcher. They cruised past the flood of people again.
Launchpad used his binoculars to look out at the crowd, he questioned, “I dunno, DW, I don’t see anyone who looks like her-”
Darkwing guffawed, speaking matter-factly “that’s because she’s a shapeshifter, LP.”
“Oh,” Launchpad quieted at that. After a moment, he looked back up at Darkwing, “but, then, DW, how can you be sure that it is HER?”
“Let’s not get dragged down by the details...” DW coughed.
“I really just think it’s a bunch of folks having a good time, DW,” Launchpad shook his head, smiling a bit, “I mean if you just want an excuse to go to a bar, we can clock out for the night-”
Darkwing stopped the bike suddenly. “Launchpad, we are not quitting.”
“Now, I didn’t say that,” Launchpad replied, furrowing his brows in concern, “I mean... whatever, you want, DW, I just thought you WERE thinking that...”
Launchpad shrugged, “Alright. I’ll just drop it then.”
There was another pause.
“Why would I want to skip out on patrol?” Darkwing asked, disgruntled, “do you think I'm giving up? We haven’t even gotten halfway through it even. We still haven’t figured out why SHUSH hasn’t called us-”
“I didn’t mean like that by it, DW.”
“Then what?” he demanded.
His sidekick raised his hands up defensively, “I mean, we haven’t had a real date night in a while...”
Darkwing gave him an incredulous look.
“Not that I mind! Y’know, I’m low-maintenance about that stuff,” Launchpad brushed the hair out of his face, “I’m just explaining what I meant...”
“Great,” Darkwing revved up his bike, “now if you don’t mind, let’s worry about the important stuff. Like what the Fearsome Five are up to.”
The Ratcatcher started up again. Racing for another lap around St. Canard, Darkwing Duck and his sidekick, Launchpad, to finish out their patrol for the night and nothing less.