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Kyoko's Melons

Chapter Text

August, 1998

Dr. Kyoko Sohryu-Zeppelin sits at her desk, contemplating her new position at the organization, Gehirn.

 I don’t know why I’m so worried; the recruiter couldn’t have been more open and forthcoming. I mean, why in the world would I ever pass this up? I’ve always wanted to work on something more interesting than just rats…

But, still… Greg’s been more and more distant lately. Even when I told him how excited I was about the job, he just shrugged and said, “So, will we have to move?”

Come on! It’s been WEEKS since –


Her thoughts are interrupted by the door opening.

She looks up, and would say something, if she wasn’t so preoccupied with her own private troubles.

“Ah, too handsome for words, eh?” says the man at the door, with a sparkle in his eye. He leans against the doorpost, with his hands in his pockets. “They do say that about me… I don’t know why, but women seem to be drawn to me like flies. Then again, I don’t think I’ve ever seen any quite like you before, Kyoko.”


What the hell is this guy doing, calling me by my first name? Sure, I clean up nicely… I mean, I have to. How else am I going to get Greg to pay me any attention?

Wait. Focus, Kyoko. You just started a new job, and someone finally showed up after they led you to your office, left you there, and said to “Await further instructions” – as if you’re in some kind of intelligence organization. Might as well hear what he has to say. Anyway, not the worst-looking messenger they could’ve sent…


“How can I help you?” she says, nonchalantly. She bends under her desk, and retrieves the plastic container underneath. “Ah, always nice to enjoy my Baumküchen. Truly, food to nourish the soul. You were saying?”

The man runs his fingers through his hair, stands up straight, and walks over to her desk. Bending over, he puts his face directly in front of hers. “You can feed it to me, if you like.” he says, flashing a devilish smile.

She grabs the cake, turns her back to him in her swivel chair, and begins eating. “No thanks. I assume you have something work-related to tell me?”

He straightens himself. “Playing hard-to-get, I see. Well,” he says, shrugging, “Only makes it more fun for me.” He pulls out his ponytail, and starts tying it back on. “They wanted me to tell you to start working on the sample right away.”

“What sample?” she says, hiding her blushing face behind her computer terminal.


What the hell is wrong with you? You’re a married woman! Sure, Greg’s not exactly the most attentive husband, and it’s nice to be appreciated for once, considering all the effort you put into your appearance…


“Well, this one, of course.” he says, taking a small vial out of his pocket. It contains a weird, egg-white-like substance. “Not that I have any idea what it is...” he says, holding it up to the light with one eye closed. “I guess that’s why they hire brilliant minds like yours. Of course, I’d be lying if I said that was all-”

She grabs the vial out of his hands. “Could you please not treat this so casually? It’s worth more than you are.”

He chuckles, and leaves the office, hands in pockets.


God, Kyoko. I know it’s been a while, but… him? Of all the men in the world… Just forget it. Pull yourself together. After all, you’re ovulating. Maybe tonight, Greg’ll be home early enough…




Same day – 4:55 PM


Kyoko puts the sample aside. She stands up, ready to leave.

As she’s walking out, she sees the man from earlier waiting in the hall, hands in pockets.


“Hey, beautiful. How’s work?” he says, without looking up.

“A lot better if you weren’t here.” she says, annoyed.


Why the hell is this guy bothering me? Does he have nothing better to do than flirt with uninterested women? Well, not completely uninterested--

Stop. Stop. Ovulation. Baby. Husband.

Phew... All right. Mind back on track; let’s go home.


He lifts his head. “It’s usually a lot easier than this.” he muses. He erects himself away from the wall, and places himself directly in front of her. “Something must be troubling you. I can tell. C’mon, babe, you can tell Kaji everything.” he says. “I won’t bite. Well, no guarantees on that front, but...”


Maybe it would be nice for a change, a guy who’ll listen. And that ponytail… I’d certainly love to put my hands in those pockets. Such firm pock--

Stop! No! Bad Kyoko!

Bad Kyoko’, eh? I like the sound of--

That’s it! I’M taking control now.

You haven’t heard the last of meeeee…..


“Shut up. Seriously, this was annoying before, but now it’s harassment. If you don’t stop now, I’ll call HR.” she pushes him aside, and continues down the hallway to the door.

Without moving or looking at her retreating form, he speaks up. “Ohh… I know what your problem is. You’ve already got a guy, don’t you?”

She stops.

“Yeah, and I bet he never pays attention to you. Mhmm. Only plausible explanation for resisting my charms.” He says, with a confident calm. “Well, and lesbianism, but that’s never been proven.”


Those charms… Who in their right mind’d resist those? I could take his ‘charms’ deep into me any day of the-

Hey! This is MY body!

Outta the way, bitch. This is my body, and soon it won’t just be mine, if you get my drift…

Husband! Marriage. Baby… AARGGHHH! Can’t… breathe…

Now, eyes on the prize, Kyoko.


She turns around to face him, and moves toward him with a powerful sense of purpose.