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Stories of Bullworth Academy

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 If Jimmy Hopkins was Petey’s white knight, Sherri Clarkson was his guardian angel.

 And this was certainly a strange fairy tale.

 Petey was sure Cinderella didn't refer to Prince Charming as Dinghis Khan,or give her ugly stepsister a slap for good measure, but fairy stories at Bullworth always involved insults and violence.


 After the debacle that was in and of itself Gary Smith, Petey thought perhaps he'd have some street cred at Bullworth-even just an opening deposit, a line of credit, something. And to some degree, he was no longer treated like dirt. He wasn't treated like a human being either(but that was a pipe dream at Bullworth, so). The jocks still called him a dork and most of the girls wouldn't give him the time of the goddam day, but they didn't outright ignore him either. There's an exception to every rule and Petey was lucky enough to have two. Jimmy Hopkins was by no stretch the perfect best friend, but he treated him with dignity and wouldn't hesitate to call him a friend. The second exception was Sherri Clarkson.

  Sherri wasn't really popular, but she was well known and for all the wrong reasons, but mainly for the plant growing in her wardrobe, which she'd sell you a bit of for the right price and of course, your discretion. Her appearance was neither striking nor extraordinarily ordinary. She had rather long black hair with blue high lights which was almost exclusively kept tied back. Word of mouth would have you believe that the carpet did not match the drapes, a rumour she staunchly denied.

 She was mostly the type of person you would meet and immediately forget, unless you understood her place in the school. Though she answered to no clique, she had become exclusive property of Jimmy’s leadership over Bullworth. It was never made clear if she was exclusively his, though Petey dared not to ask. Sherri had garnered a few unsavory nicknames under this new regime. The cheerleaders called her Scary Sherri and the jocks called her Captain Cannabis, and Petey was sure neither would look good on a resume.


 The fall nights at Bullworth were chilly. Pulling his jacket closer, Petey glanced around the darkening campus. It was only about five pm, but the sun was already beginning to set. In the fading orange light, Petey caught a glimpse of midnight hair tied back in a tight bun.

“Expecting someone?” He asked, causing Sherri to turn abruptly.

“Oh,it's just you. “She didn't seem relieved though. Petey frowned.

“You OK?” He asked, biting his lip. Sherri shrugged.

“Yeah. S’not important. “She said, glancing away.

“It looks important-”

“But it's not, OK?” She snapped.

Sherri…You know you can talk to me. I'm… I'm your friend… Aren't I?” Petey asked, scratching the back of his neck nervously. Sherri swallowed.

“I had a date.. That, ugh.. “She wiped her eyes, smearing the eyeliner he'd just realized she was wearing across her eyelids and face.

She’d been stood up.

Shit,Sherri. Who had the balls to blow you off?”

Sherri sniffled a little.

“Gord Vendome.”

“You accepted a date with Gord?”

“What of it?” She growled, causing Petey take a step back.

“N-nothing. Just… Didn't you kind of expect this?” He asked. Sherri swallowed again.

“Admittedly, I should have. I've just never been on a date and I thought… Maybe it was a pity date or somethin’ like that.” She confessed. Hesitantly, Petey rested a hand on her shoulder.

“You shouldn't have to accept pity dates. You're worth way more than Gord Verdome’s time anyway.” He said, shaking his head. Sherri met his eyes, biting her lip nervously. She looked as though she was contemplating something. It made Petey nervous-dear God, was she about to shank him? Why were girls so confusing and sometimes scary?  

She was suddenly kissing him.

Kissing him, Petey Kowalski.

Petey Kowalski was having his first kiss. This didn't go unnoticed by their peers. Derby Harrington came to a full stop and nearly face planted when Bif Taylor slammed into him.

“Pete Kowalski… Has hell frozen over?” Derby mumbled, before Bif gave him a light shove to get him moving again.

 Sherri was pushing him now, leading him around campus to the boy's dorm. The prefects never patrolled their dorm and, as such, it was a haven for petty crime,drugs and alcohol. Petey was practically sweating bullets now, unsure what was coming next.

“Which one's yours?” Sherri mumbled against his lips.

“First one on the left.” Petey replied, his voice cracking. Sherri giggled, pressing him against the door with another kiss.

“Sherri, isn't this a bit-”

“Fast? Impulsive? Erratic? Maybe. But I just need you right now, Petey.”

 Chills ran down his spine.

 She didn't mean…

 The door burst open behind him, which was quite startling, but it was shut as fast as it was open and now they were on the other side of it.

 She discarded her sweater vest before pushing him onto the bed and straddling him

 Should he have felt embarrassed by how tight his pants suddenly were? He reminded himself that it was natural. Besides, Sherri seemed to like it. She smirked, before placing his hands on her hips and unbuttoning her shirt.

 Petey’s mind blanked.

 The next thing he knew, he was absolutely wrecked. His stomach muscles burned and his pelvis was numb, not to mention the fading pulsing sensation below.

 Sherri was nuzzled against him, panting softly. There was a blanket wrapped around both of them, though he had no idea how that had happened.

Holy shit.” Petey muttered, staring at the ceiling. His throat was very dry and he wanted to get up and get them a beverage, but his limbs didn't want to obey him.

 As if he'd read Petey’s mind, there was a knock on the door, before Jimmy poked his head in.

“Top of the morning, dude.” He teased, shutting the door behind him.

“Was it that loud?” Petey asked weakly.

“I'm not sure if you caught the standing ovation or not.” Jimmy said,setting two sodas on the nightstand. Petey went bright red.

“Is she alright? Sherri? Are you dead?” Jimmy continued.

“I'm not sure yet. My calves feel like I ran the Boston Marathon.” Sherri replied in a groggy voice.        

 Jimmy laughed.

“I can imagine. When you feel up to it, I brought pizza.” He said, before exiting the room.

 They laid in relative silence, until

“OK, time to get up. My ass is falling asleep.” Sherri sat up and retrieved her soda,popping the the tab open and taking a long drink. Petey redressed quickly, before turning to her.

“What does this…I mean, are we together or was this like a one time thing?”  The question caused Sherri to turn slightly.

“Do you want it to be a one time thing?” She asked, eyebrow raised.

“No.” Petey shook his head.

“Then, it's whatever you want it to be.” She replied.


The news quickly spread around Bullworth and for the first time in his life, Petey felt cool. Apparently, his cred had only required him losing his virginity.

 It'd come at the cost of Sherri’s dignity, as some of the cheerleaders began to call her derogatory names, but Sherri took this in stride.

 Her fist strode right into Mandy Wiles’ face.