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I'll find a way (to show him some love)

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jinyoung was really scared of the upcoming year. okay, he was a bit used with being the youngest in his classroom, but at least the hyungs' faces were familiar. but these classmates? they were all strangers to him, and sure he might be a bubbly and friendly kid, but he was still really awkward and introvert. 

he entered his classroom, sat at the closest seat and and silently hoped this day would past fast. his previous school only had until middle school, but this one was in charge of preschool until high school, which meant everyone knew each other since they were fetuses. jinyoung never felt so much as an intruder as he waited for the teachers and the remaining classmates. 

classmates.... he could feel those who has arrived already looking at his direction at least once. he'd rather think it's all inside his mind, that he was over thinking, he was that anxious. 

a group of boys arrived all at once and jinyoung isn't the type to stare, but they were really talkative and happy considering it was not even eight in the morning yet (they probably just met each other after a long school break but come on, is it even possible to be that bright that early?) and it was hard not to look at them. they were all so handsome too, they naturally caught people's attention. he'd not be surprised if they all had a fan club dedicated to them.

a petit boy met his gaze and damn. jinyoung was already pretty sure he wasn't straight but that boy had just confirmed it. how can someone be so eye captivating only by breathing? 

the boy stopped looking at him as the teacher stopped behind him and his group and told them to hurry inside. much to his unluck, the group went towards his direction, but the handsome boy hadn't sat with him. he was in front of him, which wasn't any better. it was distracting. 

the boy who did sat by his side introduced himself as joo haknyeon and what's with this school and its visuals? he felt much less confident sitting near so many pretty boys. life was unfair. but at least haknyeon didn't make him feel uncomfortable or weird, in fact the few times they exchanged words he had been really sweet and didn't act like he was someone superior (for jumping a year over his intelligence) nor inferior (for being a dongsaeng). jinyoung hoped this was a start of a valuable friendship. 

the bell rang, and the newcomer had no idea what he'd do until the boy in front of him turned around. 

"hey, you're new here right? i didn't recognize you." 

jinyoung breathed deeply to calm down. it's just. a really really handsome boy being friendly. nothing to be afraid of, ey! "y- yeah, i'm bae jinyoung. i'm born in 2000 so i guess you're my hyung?"

the cute boy blinked. "are you early born?"

"actually not", haknyeon spoke for him, smiling. "he skipped a year, so he's our maknae."

"oh i see", cute boy said. "i'm park jihoon, and this one" he pointed at the boy in front of haknyeon's seat, one of the boys who were chatting together this morning, "is byun hyunmin. we usually eat together with a few more boys but this year they are in different classes. you can join us if you'd like?"

jinyoung caught himself nodding without thinking. "i-- i'm pretty lost honestly, i am not sure where everything is yet."

"it's okay", hyunmin said quietly. "he'll help you."

"well, let's go mm, jinyoungie?"

maybe high school wasn't going to be as scary as he thought. 

 

 

 

 

dongmyunghyung (18:09)

me: hyung

dongmyunghyung: youre calling me hyung 

dongmyunghyung: what happened are you okay???? 

me: don't make me sound like a rude brat i always call you hyung

me: i just

me: wanted to talk to someone 

dongmyunghyung: awww♡♡♡ cute

dongmyunghyung: is everything okay at your new school???? 

me: yes it's fine

me: i met cool hyungs

dongmyunghyung: tell me eeeeveeerything!!!! ヾ(*´∀`*)ノ

me: well

me: wait ill send it all in one message so sorry beforehand

dongmyunghyung: OK!!!! ∩(︶▽︶)∩

me: theres haknyeoniehyung who is a very bright and nice to me, and theres hyunminiehyung but hes really quiet so idk what to think of him yet.... then theres woojiniehyung he didnt talk much to me but i also didn't talk much to him, i think he takes time to talk to strangers just like me... hes with hyungseopiehyung whos pretty much his opposite its cute.... and theres jihooniehyung

me: and........

me: ...yeah

dongmyunghyung: ....?????

dongmyunghyung: what about this jihoon????? 

me: what

dongmyunghyung: give me at least two words to describe him!!!! 

dongmyunghyung: other than yeah

me: mmm

me: hes... handsome 

me: and cute

me: but also really really nice? 

me: hes also the most popular boy in school

me: can you believe i, bae jinyoung, befriended the most popular and handsome boy in school 

me: but he isnt full of himself for that 

me: and he treats me the best 

dongmyunghyung: mmmmm

dongmyunghyung: do u liiiiike him? ;D

me: yeah?????

dongmyunghyung: i meant like

dongmyunghyung: like LIKE him

me: ....dongmyung.

me: i just met him.

dongmyunghyung: it's hyung to you

dongmyunghyung: and

dongmyunghyung: so???

dongmyunghyung: i just met sunghyuk and i already know we're meant! to!!! be!!!!!!

dongmyunghyun: ;D

me: ......wow you're fast 

me: you spent your summer break mourning over kiwookie

dongmyunghyung: we gotta move on jinyoungie

dongmyunghyung: either way sunghyuk is nice

dongmyunghyung: he's a bit grumpy at first but i think it's just a cover or smth

me: grumpy

dongmyunghyung: ill soft him up!!!! 

dongmyunghyung: anyway don't change subject!!!! abt your crush jisung

me: u mean jihoonhyung

dongmyunghyung: ohhh so u admiiiit u got a cruuuush on jihooooooon ;)

me: wh

me: did u juts

me: oh my gOd hyung i canOOt belIEVe YOu

me: im going to sleep idk why i messaged you 

dongmyunghyung: bc u love me

dongmyunghyung: dream abt jihoon!!!! love u

me: istg... 

 

 

 

 

what dongmyung said kept bothering him. crush, as in him liking someone... hah. he wanted it to not be true. 

but damn. the more he thought of it, the more it made sense. it made sense, because every time jihoon's attention was on him he'd get super conscious of it and be careful with his words, his body would tense up without him noticing, his heart would race and his stomach would feel funny. he could be in love, or he was deadly sick, and the source of his sickness was no other than park jihoon. 

well, jinyoung rather seeing him as a love interest rather than... that

haknyeon and dongmyung would be great friends, the younger noticed, by the way he started acting once he told him about his potential crush. at least on joo's case the teasing went both ways, after the younger discovered his crush on hyunmin, but it still made him think and think and think of jihoon with other eyes and... damn, his hyungs were right.

he... had this massive crush on park goddamnit jihoon-hyung.

"hey, bae jinyoung, you listening?"

the young boy blinked a few times after hearing his name. right... he was with woojin and hyungseop at the library because both hyungseop and himself were behind with math and woojin suggested to help them study (actually, hyungseop was doing surprisingly well on the subject but still decided to step by because he loved watching his boyfriend look all serious and focused). 

"what?"

a silent sigh. "come on jinyoung, even hyungseop's focusing more than you and all he's been doing was sent heart eyes at me", said boy simply smiled wider as if it proved his point. woojin looked at the younger of the three's direction, looking serious but different than when he was explaining how to solve the problem in front of them. "you know you can tell us your hyungs if there's something bothering you, right, jinyoungie?"

jinyoung was about to let it die with a simple 'yes hyung', but then hyungseop stopped looking at their tutour to look at him and nod at woojin's words, looking a little worried. "it's... weird", he decided to say instead.

the couple rose their browns. "that's quite vague. and creepy", the oldest finally spoke.

under the table, jinyoung was playing with his fingers. "i might like jihoonie-hyung...?", he said in a low tone, but his hyungs still heard it. hyungseop's eyes went super wide - was that even possible -  while woojin's mouth formed an 'o', but didn't speak for a few moments. it was suddenly silent, and okay it was normal for a library, but this duo was anything but quiet and it was uncomfortable. then, the older's hands went to his face while he tried not to laugh, while the tutour looked confused.

"that's all? god jinyoungie, i thought you'd say something, i don't know, like that you were one of the members of woojinie's dance team and did worst than his past--"

"that was not necessary", woojin finally spoke. "either way, jinyoung, why do you think it's weird?"

the younger stared at him. "because it's hyung?"

"so?", they both spoke.

jinyoung sighed. "what do you mean, so? he's perfect! he's handsome, cute, can dance so well, aces everything he does! and then there's me, i'm awkward, not interesting or funny, and i can't do any of these dumb exercises. people say i'm handsome but honestly that's all i have. i don't deserve him"

woojin let a breath. "i had the feeling you'd say because he's a boy, thank god."

"no, i always knew i like boys... but why him? he's way out of my league, hyung."

hyungseop stared at him. "seriously? bae jinyoung, you're not just a pretty face, but i don't think you'll believe if you hear it from me. either way, you both deserve each other and if one of you doesn't take initiative already i'm going to get mad at you both."

"hyungseop, babe--"

"no, woojinie, i am serious! look at them, both so helpless about their crush and not doing anything and it's so tiring--"

"hey you, little boy! this is a library, you know."

the older of the two looked at the girl who spoke that, a senior they saw once or twice. his ears quickly went red as he apologized, looking back at the two younger boys at his table.

"that's why i wanted you to tone down", woojin spoke. "but yeah, just talk to him. seriously, you're both on the same boat. cheer up, dongsaeng-ah. now, we have some studying to do."

he stared at him, and then realisation hit him. "wait. did you mean that hyung--"

"studying, bae jinyoung. you too, ahn hyungseop, quit the eye hearts."

"aww come on!"

 

 

 

 

talking to them didn't really help. it's weird realising you have a crush, but way weirder when you suspect they might know it.

he wasn't sure if he did know - but having ahn hyungseop as a friend obviously meant one or two secrets of yours would end up slipping at some point - but jihoon started acting a bit different with him some days after the library conversation and jinyoung didn't like it at all. it made him overthink, maybe he knows after all. why would his behaviour change then? he spoke less to his, directly to him, his texts was blunter, the skinships also disappeared. he felt somewhat lonely even if jihoon was right there.

maybe he was just doing a fuss over nothing. 'just talk to him', woojin's voice reasoned in his mind during days and days. honestly, he did a good job ignoring it for over two weeks, but eventually, he listened to it.

jihooniehyung (14:23)

me: hyung

me: can u come to the vocal practice room?

me: number 10

jihooniehyung: uhhh right now?

me: ye

me: im practiscing a song n need help, idk if i'm doing it right

me: pretty pleeeeeeeaaaseeee

me: hyooooonngggg

me: its rly urgent!!!!

me: :0!!!!

jihooniehyung: are u trying to do aegyo thru text

me: ..is it working

jihooniehyung:

jihooniehyung: i'll finish practicing and i'll be there in 15

me: sweet thx hyung

he considered adding a 'ily' but fought against it. instead, he put his phone away and decided to keep singing the bridge of a bts song he'd been practising for a few days now, but still had found the high notes really hard to do.

eventually he heard a couple of knocks coming from the door, telling him jihoon's own practice had ended. he stopped winging automatically, telling the older he could enter.

jihoon looked tired, he noticed as soon as he was visible. well, way more tired than he usually does after finishing practice, as if it wasn't just his practise that worn out all of his energy. it made the younger feel some kind of discomfort inside, was he all right? he was the type to always smile but never tell what's bothering him, and although he was fond of his hyung he hated this habit of his.

the older said a hey in a low voice, getting one of the extra chairs to place it next to jinyoung, but not as close as he'd usually stay. weird. but he wasn't visibly mad or sad at him, no, he was giving him a short but sweet smile. "you wanted my help?"

"ah, yes", the younger blinked a few times, waking him from his own thoughts, and breathed in. then, he started singing, eyes closed. he was still a bit uncomfortable by singing in public, but he was working on it. still, it was jihoon, his crush, so he hoped he'd not freak out by closing his eyes. when he was over, he looked at his hyung who seemed really into it, it was a bit embarrassing if he'd been honest. he didn't look that much tired and his smile had gotten wider. "so... h- how was it?"

jihoon looked away for a bit, ears red. and... was he closer to his dongsaeng or was it his imagination? did he got closer to him while he sang? "i think it was pretty good?"

"are you... serious?"

"yeah, no need to be insecure jinyoungie."

the older looked back at him. "even the high note?"

he hummed. "maybe if you controlled your breathing you'll find it easier to make the high note, but that's only it, you're really good already."

"okay... thank you hyung. i'll keep it in mind next time."

"next time?", jihoon innocently blinked at him. "are you not going to keep practising? it's still 20 to three pm."

jinyoung got up and looked at his hyung. "well... since you're here i was wondering maybe we should hang out just the two of us? just this once? i know we both should study or practice but it's been so long since we last did it... please, hyung?"

jihoon's face started to blush, and it seemed that he was fighting against a smile by the way his lips moved. "just the two of us?"

"yeah? consider it a..." damn, just say it! it isn't hard. "a d- date."

"a date...? but--"

"hyung", the younger said a bit too quickly. "i... i need to tell you something. i didn't call you to help me singing, actually i kind of did but it was mostly a excuse for the real reason."

the older didn't say a thing, nor changed his expression - although his face did get pinker, maybe understanding where jinyoung were going with that - so he understood as his cue to continue.

"when i moved schools i was really scared, but you made me feel like i belonged and i'm really glad for that. the other hyungs did too but since you become one of my closest friends and my... my love interest, i am happy for you a little more. you are very nice, hyung, and even with all your fans praising you for anything you still stay humble and isn't rude to any of your close friends and i respect you for that. you're also so smart and talented and beautiful, hyung... i really, really love you."

jihoon opened his mouth but jinyoung was faster.

"it's okay though, hyung! you don't need to say anything. it's understandable if you don't like me, i'm not half of what you are, i just needed to tell you, you can forget it now--"

"bae jinyoung."

that made him shut up, and he noticed he started tearing up at some moment. great, you just said it was okay but is tearing up in front of him. great.

"jinyoung-ah, look at your hyung, hm?", it took him a while, but he got strength to look at him. jihoon had gotten up and held him by the hips. it felt weirdly intimate but he didn't run away from the touch. "you are the most hardworking and handsome boy i have ever met, so please do not look down on yourself, okay?"

without much thought, the younger nodded at him.

"i'm serious. you're an amazing singer and will do great in the future. you're super talented and way more handsome than most people we know - and don't try to deny it. you're also so nice to anyone near you, and damn, if you weren't smart you wouldn't have jumped a grade. it's not that you don't deserve me, but the other way around. and i really, really love you, do not doubt it anymore, okay?" the older's thumb were now on jinyoung's face, cleaning his tears. "how come even crying you're handsome."

the younger blushed. "stop it, hyung."

"what? i'm serious", he smiled at the younger. "so, do you still wanna go on a date? i know a good cafeteria."

jinyoung smiled. "okay hyung, okay."

 

 

 

 

dongmyunghyung (18:52)

me: today was a good day

me: went to have some ice cream

me: [me_and_jihoonie_day1.png]

me: with my

me: b

me: o

me: y

me: f

me: r

me: i

me: e

me: n

me: d

me: how's going with sunghyukkiehyung btw, dongmyungah?

me: softened him up already? ;)

dongmyunghyung: sINCE WHEN

me: today, 2:40pm aprox

dongmyunghyung: damn

dongmyunghyung: well,

dongmyunghyung: glad my teasing opened ur eyes kid congrats

dongmyunghyung: also

dongmyunghyung: its hyung to you u brat

me: lol ukno i do it on purpose

dongmyunghyung: yeh...

dongmyunghyung: oh and

dongmyunghyung: abt sunghyuk

me: yes????? ;) ;) ;) 

dongmyunghyung: i sent his a silly pick up line

me: like always

dongmyunghyung: and he

dongmyunghyung: didnt roll his eyes

me: !!!!

me: we love relationship development

dongmyunghyung: thERES MORE

me: !!!! intensifies

dongmyunghyung: he replied me

dongmyunghyung: with

dongmyunghyung: a

dongmyunghyung: n

dongmyunghyung: o

dongmyunghyung: t

dongmyunghyung: h

dongmyunghyung: e

dongmyunghyung: r

dongmyunghyung: pick

dongmyunghyung: up

dongmyunghyung: line.

dongmyunghyung: nd i got proof.

dongmyunghyung: [screenshot1702199899.png]

me: !!!!!!!!!!!!

me: congrats hyung

me: still got my man before you tho :p

dongmyunghyung: shut up.

me: i love you

dongmyunghyung: i know

dongmyunghyung: ily2 <3

dongmyunghyung: no more than sunghyukkie tho

me: good nuff

 

 

 

 

"finally!", hyungseop exclamed when the newly formed couple told their friends about them. "no offence, but you were both really annoying."

"none taken" jihoon said, while woojin looked at his boyfriend like he had said the worst thing ever. "but at least the pining ended, right, sweetie?"

jinyoung didn't answer with words, but kissed his cheek and hugged his arm.

"wow you're that pda already", haknyeon snorted.

the younger turned to look at him "stop being petty just because hyunminie-hyung didn't ask you yet."

most of them looked at the jeju boy with surprised faces while he blushed. thankful (or not?) the taekwondo fighter hadn't arrive to their table yet.

"hey", jihoon whispered.

"yes, hyung?"

"nothing. just a reminder that i love you."

he smiled. "i love you too."

 

 

 

 

("i gotta agree with haknyeon, that's too much. i might get diabetes."

"woojin-ah, i might be glad you agree with me but you're the last one who can complain about pda. your boyfriend is ahn hyungseop."

"i'll take that as a compliment."

"it wasn't, hyungseop. it wasn't")