Chapter 1: wEL COME
dino-saur added 18 other users to chat
dino-saur named chat: it's mingle time
dino-saur hELLO EVERYONE WELCOME
angelface chan sweety~~ what is this
mother who are y'all what is happening
nicegemini are there actually 19 fucking people in this chatroom
tallbeagle CHANNIE HYUNG YOU ACTUALLY DID IT
dino-saur of cOURSE i DID
therock sanha what have u done
minhoe r u dwayne johnson
therock what no
HOSH ah i wish you were dwayne johnson he's so daddy
HOSH sorry babe it's true
dad Ok. Let's all settle and introduce ourselves.
father how about we all calm down and introduce ourselves so it's less confusing
puppycat oh wow
whatwoo do we have 2 dads now
hitthekwan whaAT Is hAPEENign
verdone LETS LISTEN To DADS
dad Thank you Hansol.
verdone np dad
dad Okay I'll start I suppose. Hello to all who don't know me, I'm Choi Seungcheol, I'm 21 years old, and I live in Seoul.
woozi you're so boring cheol
angelface i'll go next!! btw we all live in Seoul together just to let you know~~
angelface so im yoon jeonghan, also 21, i'm dating the beautiful hong jisoo so ahem back off,,, anyway nice to meet you!!~~
dino-saur he's our mom figure!
joshed han pls
joshed welp i'm hong jisoo but you can call me joshua, im 21 also, and i love music and rabbits
puppycat this is going to take forever ye
tallbeagle shhh binnie hyung let them continue
goodgemini i'm junhui, gemini, chinese, 20, aspiring actor
mother should i be feeling threatened rn bc i am
minghoe jun hyung wtf
woozi you sound like some weird guy you meet at the bar who has one beer and tells you their life story
goodgemini ?!!/!? iT WAS strAIGHT TO THE POINT
HOSH anyway,,, moving on
HOSH im kwon soonyoung!!! i'm 20 years old and i like to dance!!
dkcountryreturns cough cough cough
HOSH AH yes and i am dating seokmin btw
father we couldn't tell,,
therock DID I HEAR DANCE
therock D A n CE
hitthekwan wow seok that was some smooth shit right there
dkcountryreturns aW i AM SO tOUCHED I LoVE YOU <3333333
HOSH I LOV E YIO TOO <333
whatwoo hello i am jeon wonwoo
visual w o w
puppycat aRE You relaTED TTO JEON JUNGKOOK
joshed isn't he the maknae from bts
puppycat yE s
whatwoo yes i am!
therock he literally just fell to the floor
therock i think he's crying?
therock yup. crying.
puppycat i LOVE JEON JUNGKOOK
whatwoo he's my cousin
tallbeagle binnie hyung are you okau
puppycat wonWOO tELL yoUR COUSin i WANNA SuCC
mother oooh don't let dongmin hear youuu
father where is dongmin?!
woozi my turn losers. i'm lee jihoon, i'm 20 years old, i'm not short, and i am dating seungcheol
visual thatS a L I E
visual jiHOON iS 5'5
mother g a SP
mother JINJIN DO YOU KNOW HWAT THis mENAs
mother S OMEONE IS SHORTER THB US
tallbeagle theyre crying lol!
verdone i think we've made mmost of y'all cry and it's been like 10 minutes i think we desrve an award
woozi kim mingyu
woozi do you want to live till your 21 birthday?
visual yes jihoon
woozi then i suggest keeping your mouth shut :)
visual y ES JIHOON
dkcountryreturns HELLO!! i am dk, aka dokyeom, aka lee seokmin!! i am 20 and dating hoshi aka soonyoung!!
hitthekwan they REEALy like eachother btw
verdone yeh be prepared to endure lots of gooey shit with these 2
HOSH okay VERKWAN just bc y'all have some UST goinf on does not mean u can act annoyed about our loving relationship
verdone wh a t
hitthekwan suddenly i have a thing at the thing bYE
angelface yes dear?
mother oops wrong child
dino-saur what is UST?
angelface ahh well channie, ust stands for unresolved sexual tension, and it's something we have to deal with on a daily basis
joshed our leading contender of the dreaded UST is Hansol and Seungkwan, who look at eachother's backsides more than their faces; than we have Junhui and Minghao, who are too awkward to admit that they feel more than normal bestfriends do; and than (of course) the meanie couple, Wonwoo and Mingyu, who on the daily switch from being basically married to being awkward strangers. Please donate money to Hong Jisoo and Yoon Jeonghan so we can resolve these potential couple's terrible fate..
HOSH IM AKGHING SI HARD LITERALLY EVERYONE JUST RAN IN SIFFRENT DIRECTIONS
dkcountryreturns frckd EXPOSDE
woozi jisoo hyung i feel like you've been waiting to let that out
dad That was typed out so fast, wow.
mother i can smell the drama that will come out of this gc i am SO ready
visual lETS conTINUE
visual okay I Am KIM MINGYU I AM 20 YEARS OLD AND I aM THE VISUAL oF evERYONE
dino-saur it's true
tallbeagle ooh you should see the visual of our friendgroup!
mother sanha dear are you referencing me bc I have headshots ready
tallbeagle nope! i'm talking about cha eunwoo!!
minhoe cha eunwoo?/!?!?1 like /the/ cha eunwoo??????
tallbeagle [image] this guy?
woozi holy shit
minhoe i CAN'T brAETE
dino-saur i told you they'd react this way sanha! our whole friendgroup bonds over a similar bond of adoring cha eunwoo
dad jiHOONIE AND I HAVE EVERYSINGLE OF HIS MOVIES
angelface jisOO BABE pinCH ME
visual changed username to memegyu
puppycat oh me oh my
father should we tell them
dino-saur just wait a bit hyung! have him say it when it's time to introduce y'all!
dino-saur minghao you're next!!
minghoe WOO sorry I had to calm myself down I can't believe you guys are friends with cha eunwoo
minghoe ANYWAY im xu minghao!! i'm chinese! i'm 19! i like to dance!
therock da n ce
angelface okay!! three more of us!! let's go!! kwannie you're next!!
hitthekwan finaALLY heLLo! i am boo(yonce) seungkwan!! i am fabulous and 19 years old and i need love!! support me!! I can sing!! also I am from Jeju ;)
HOSH we love you seungkwan 1!!!!1!1 <33
hitthekwan nAEGA HOSH i jUST ChOKD up I LOV EYOU ToOO
verdone ahem,,, hello am vernon aka choi hansol 19 years young i like to rap and drake v nice to meet you
mother ,,, did ,,,
woozi you just say ,,,,,
whatwoo "19 years young"
minghoe i think i just vommed a little
dino-saur HANSOL YOU JUST HAD YOON SANHA,, PUREST OF ALL PURES,, THE MOST BEAUTIFUL SOUL ON THIS EARTH,, 'YIKES' YOU HOLY SHIT
dad Language channie.
dino-saur sorry dad
verdone WHAT WRONG WITH 19 YEARS YOUNG
joshed oh god please help this child
dkcountryreturn EVEN JISOOS CHRIST IS PRAYING 4 U VERNON
dino-saur A N Y W A Y
dino-saur hello!! I am dino aka lee chan!! i am 18 years old and i love dancing and Michael Jackson!!
angelface isn't he adorable
woozi if anyone hurts this child you will regret ever being born
puppycat wasn't planning on it! :D
tallbeagle is it our turn?? nice to meet you all by the way!!
dad You guys go ahead!
father they amazingly did that in age order so MJ hyung you should start
mother ah~ ok,, hello i am mj aka kim myungjun!! i am 23 years old and i love iron man and singing!
dad So you are everyone's elder?
mother ahhhshh i supposed so but don't say it outloud lolol
dino-saur it's okay mj hyung!! it means you are wiser and more mature than all of us! a true mother!!
mother thank you chan-ah~~
therock hhmm i wouldn't say that
mother park minhyuk
therock SOR r Y hYUNG
father hey i am jinjin aka park jinwoo,, i am 21 yrs old and i like rapping and g-dragon also i am dating MJ
memegyu awh we have an actual mother and father couple in the gc instead the awkward dad figure and mom figure who probably used to date but then found other ppl and kept the concepts with their new significant others but it's still a little awkward when the family concept comes up and the author has too many ships and feels bad to have the broken parents but their larger ships must reign on
joshed a n YWA AY
puppycat um! i don't know where minnie is? he may still be working so i'll go!!
father just go ahead we'll introduce him later
puppycat hello! i am moon bin! i am 19 years old, i like to dance and i model and sing as a hobby!
angelface who do you model for?
puppycat um you may know the company, ASTRO entertainment? They do all kinds of stuff for singers, rappers, actors, models and stuff... that's where our whole friend group met!
goodgemini holy shit
minghoe you guys work at ASTRO?!?!? hO MY GS
whatwoo is this [image] you??
puppycat oh yeah hahaha that's me
angelface CHANNIE BBY YOU DIDN'T TELL US THAT YOU WERE ADDING BIN,, FAMOUS MODEL aND VOCALIST,, TO OUR GC
dino-saur oops! must've slipped my mind! rocky you're next!
HOSH astro ent,,, rocky,,,, hmm,,,,
therock hello! i am park minhyuk also known as rocky!! i like dancing and martial arts and rapping!
HOSH YOU'RE /ROCKY/ duDe I'VE BEEN WATCHING YOUR DANCE COVERS SINCE YOU STARTED POSTING THEM
minghoe do yOU HEAR ME CryiNF
therock iM BLushIFN
hitthekwan wait,,, if you guys are bin and rocky,,,
verdone ,,, than mj and jinwoo,,,,
hitthekwan arE MJ AND JINJIN THE DUET COUPLE
verdone JINJIN YOU ARE THER EASON I SATRTED RAPPING
hitthekwan MJ HYUNG YOU'RE VOICE IS HEAVEN IN SOUND
HOSH CHAN AH HOW DID YOU END UP PUTTNG EVERYONE FROM ASTRO WHO IS SUCCESSFUL IN THIS CHAT
dino-saur hehe it was sanha's idea
tallbeagle heh that's me!! I'm yoon sanha, 17 years old!! i play guitar and sing and i'm really flexible?!? i also like eating so thank god i have minhyuk who can cook! we are dating btw!!
tallbeagle heehee i can't even type that without blushing
therock *slams book on desk* adorable
dkcountryreturns SANHA I HAVE A WHOLE PLAYLIST OF YOUR GUITAR COVERS
angelface SANHA YOUR VOCALS ARE THE REASON I LIVE
angelface and you're so young too!!
dino-saur guys we did it!! everyone is now introduced!!
woozi it's been a fuciing hour holys hti
dad It's actually getting kind of late, we should head to bed. Especially our new friends, who schedules must be demanding if they're working at somewhere like ASTRO.
father that's probably a good idea, say bye for now guys
tallbeagle bye guys!
joshed i'll say bye for our group lol, everyone is already asleep,,,, talk to you guys in the mornig!
chachawoo oh no :( i slept through everything,,, welp for when everyone wakes up-- i'm lee dongmin or cha eunwoo~ nice to meet you!!
minhoe imSCEAEINF CHa eunWOo
Chapter 2: more mingling
astro couple ship wars, disney songs, and verkwan ensue
this is the first time i've posted something multi chaptered on ao3 ahaha yee
anyway the little ~ symbols in between convos means time has past! rn time isn't a huge concept and doesn't really matter so just know time had past and the boys are more friendly and familiar with each other!
also it is so hard to include 19 people so i'm sorry if this is all over the place! definitely lmk if something should be fixed!
ALSO ASTRO'S SHOWCHAMPION COMEBACK STAGE FOR BABY WAS AMAZINF AND I'M STILL SHOOK ALSO ALL OF AI1 IS AMAZING WTF I LOVE MY BOIS
HOSH goOD MoRNIG my FriENDS
dkcountryreturns GOOD MORNING MY LOVE <333
tallbeagle gm !!! how did u all sleep??
minghoe wHAT IS SLEEP
minghoe I DID NOTCLOSE MY EYES ONCE LAST NIGHT
joshed hao r u okay?
minghoe I REWATCHED ALL OF CHA EUNWOOS FILMS AND DRAMAS
minghoe EVERY ONE
father there are like 8 dramas and like 15 movies??? is that possible????
puppycat did i hear eunwoo
therock dongmin was up late last night :((
puppycat well he did sleep all day yesterday, of course he'd be awake through te night
verdone who's dongmin again? i 4get
chachawoo lol me!
minghoe CHA EUNWOO
dino-saur (sorry dongmin hyung) AHHHHHHH
mother tbh same jihoon
chachawoo hehe hello everyone, it's very nice to meet you
woozi i think everyone in this household is blushing
dad Don't even try to lie Jihoon, your face is probably the rosiest of all of ours. (It's adorable).
puppycat hi minnie <3333
chachawoo morning binnie <33333
minghoe GDO NO oF courSE HE'S TAKEN
goodgemini um excuse me
minghoe whY am I liiKE thE ONLY SINGLE ONE hERE
goodgemini um /excuse me/
minghoe whY are all the attractive ones gAY
memegyu gdi minghao you're GAY
minghoe THATS NOT THE POINT
joshed i am also the gay
angelface well i'd certainly hope so !
dkcountryreturns did i hear gay
whatwoo is anyone in this chat straight
chachawoo welp i'm not
puppycat me neither
tallbeagle no one in the astro group!!
tallbeagle [image] here is bin and dongmin!!
minghoe ok u know what
minghoe i actually ship it so hard
minhoe y'all are the cutest couple i've ever seen ?????
hitthekwan POWER COUPLE
chachawoo bin is blushing so hard rn i'm so weak
dad Hearing Cha Eunwoo say that makes me feel warm inside.
chachawoo hehe pls call me dongmin guys !! i feel like we are going to be v close so pls don't feel the need to call me eunwoo!
goodgemini haohao is having trouble breathing rn i think we need a doctor
minghoe i'm FINE but anyway okay dongmin :D
puppycat [image] here's socky
therock MOON BIN DO U WANT TO DIE ATLEAST SEND A BETTER PIC
verdone nice butt @ sanha
tallbeagle hehe thank
hitthekwan excuse me
therock i don't think so pal
memegyu how did u italicise that we can't do that on this app?!?!
angelface ah the power of jealous lovers
joshed i'm thoroughly impressed
chachawoo [image] here minhyuk is this is better
therock ye s
memegyu u know it's cute when jihoon says aw
dad Wow. Jihoon approves. Impressive.
woozi u know what cheol fuck u and ur perfect texting grammar i can think things r cute ok
dino-saur mommy daddy other mom and dad are fighting what do we do
joshed it's okay chan this happens all the time
angelface it's okay channie~~ mommy is here
angelface just ignore them, this just shows that they aren't the /real/ parents here xx
woozi ok jeonghan do u wanna fight me
mother ANYWAY DO YOU WANNA SEE ME AND JINWOO
mother WE ARE A COUPLE TOO AND I WANNA SHOW US OFF SO HERE U GO
father myungjun pls
dkcountryreturns idc what y'all think but myungjin is best astro couple end of story.
woozi fuck u socky is the best
angelface ,,you can't beat the parent couple,,
dkcountryreturns THANK YOU MOMMY
angelface you are welcome child
memegyu whoops guess who's also binwoo
puppycat heh um guys you don't have to fight over our relationships lolol
hitthekwan MYUNGJIN DOMINATES
HOSH EXCUSE SOCKY IS THE BEST COUPLE EVER TO WALK THIS EARTH DONT PLAY
HOSH sorry bby i can't betray my ships
mother minhyuk stay out of this honey this isn't your fight
mother but,, everyone know's where my loyalty lies
dad I personally relate most to Myungjin.
woozi guess who's sleeping on the couch tonight! :)
woozi i'll give you a hint- it's not me :)
dad I suddenly ship Socky.
woozi thought so
HOSH why does everybody hate milk?? its so good for u and tastes good
therock i only have milk in my cereal
dino-saur maybe that's why you're so short!!
therock diNO WTF I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS
tallbeagle i drink a glass of milk everyday!!
dino-saur and that's why you're tall and strong!!
mother ah yes my bby sanha is so strong and healthy~~
memegyu i'm 185 cm and i haven't drank milk since i was like 15
woozi fuck u mingyu i've drank milk every day since i was 15 and i'm still 164 cm do u wanna die
puppycat mj hyung dongmin and I are both almost the same height as sanha and we drink milk why aren't you praising us
mother sanha is 17 and still growing while taking care of himself as a teen did /you/ do that bin?
chachawoo he didn't
puppycat min :(((
chachawoo sorry bby can't lie to mother he knows best
whatwoo motheerrrr knows best
memegyu wonwoo don't do it
whatwoo mother knows best listen to your mother it's a scary world out there
memegyu y'all im so sorry i thought we got his disney fetish under control
whatwoo it's not a fetISH
HOSH AND AT LAST I SEE THE LIGHT
dkcountryreturns AND ITS LIKE THE FOG HAS LIFTED
HOSH AND AT LAST I SEE THE LIGHT
dkcountryreturns AND ITS LIKE THE SKY IS NEWWW
tallbeagle hhm i like frozen
memegyu LET IT GOOOO
whatwoo who has the disney fetish now u asswipe
memegyu <3 LET IT GOOO
father CAN'T HOLD IT BACK ANYMOREEEE
tallbeagle do u guys know hercules? that's my favorite uwu
joshed ILL BE THERE SOMEDAY I CAN GO THE DISTANCE I WILL FIND MY WAY IF I CAN BE STRONG I KNOW EVERY MILE WILL BE WORTH MY WHILEEEEEE
angelface WHEN I GO THE DISTANCE ILL BE RIGHT WHERE I BELONG
mother BLESS MY SOUL HERC WAS ON A ROLL PERSON OF THE WEEK IN EVERY GREEK OPINION POLL
whatwoo WHAT A PRO HERC COULD STOP A SHOW POINT HIM TO A MONSTER AND YOURE TALKING S R O
dino-saur HE WAS A NO ONE
tallbeagle A ZERO ZERO
minghoe NOW HE'S A HONCHO
goodgemini HES A HERO
verdone NO CHANCE NO WAY I WONT SAY IT NO NO
HOSH YOU SWOON
dkcountryreturns YOU SIGH
memegyu DONT DENY IT UH OH
verdone ITS TOO CLICHE I WON'T SAY IM IN LOOVE
hitthekwan NO CHANCE NO WAY I WONT SAY IT NO NO
woozi GIVE UP GIVE IN
dad CHECK THE GRIN YOU'RE IN LOVE
hitthekwan THE SCENE WONT PLAY I WONT SAY IM IN LOVE
puppycat YOURE DOIN FLIPS
chachawoo READ OUR LIPS
dino-saur YOURE IN LOVE
hitthekwan suddenly i have a thing at the thing again ha ha ha silly thing ahahabye
therock okay i feel this has gotten too real
dad That played out perfectly...
memegyu i can feel the awkwardness rolling from hansol next door someone pls help
joshed hannie we must go comfort our child
angelface of course~~ let's hope he's not mad at us for being his muses ;)
woozi yes seuncheol
dad We should go find and consol Seungkwan as well. Maybe we can help to overcome the awkwardness between him and Sol.
woozi ok i'll meet you at his door
woozi if it's locked i'm kicking the door down
dad Couldn't we just knock?
dino-saur does this mean one case of UST will be solved soon?
chachawoo from the looks of it,,, probably!
HOSH whoop whoop
tallbeagle i'm glad that everyone in astro is together and happy,, UST seems scary :3
father sanha u and minhyuk had the most obvious UST i've ever had the misfortune of witnessing
mother dear god that was the worst 6 months of my life
puppycat dongmin and i had to literally kidnap the two of you and lock you in the studio so you could resolve the awkwardness
dino-saur oh i remember that !
memegyu chan how do you remember that
dino-saur i've been friends with sanha since elementary school! that's how i knew everyone lol i've known them for years
minghoe YOU'VE KNOWN ALL THESE BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE FROM ASTRO ENT FOR YEARS AND YOU'VE NEVER INTRODUCED US!?!?!
angelface bin and dongmin you've inspired us
woozi verkwan are currently locked in the basement
dad We've decided to keep them in their until they sort it out
angelface jisoo's eavesdropping atm
joshed I HEAR SOMETHING
joshed EW ABORT ABORT
woozi yuck yuck yuck
angelface DO WE LEAVE THEM? WHAT DO WE DO?
mother waht is happeing
tallbeagle do i need to call the police?
tallbeagle or the ghostbusters?
dad Um. Hansol and Seungkwan have gotten over their thing.
joshed THEY'VE DONE MORE THAN JUST GET OVER IT
joshed I NEVER WANT TO HEAR KWANNIE'S VOICE AGAIN
angelface I FEEL LIKE I NEED TO CLEAN MYSELF
woozi save us
chachawoo oh yeah we forgot to tell you this was the result of the operation
puppycat um make sure you let them out before they do something,,,,,, unsanitary
angelface SHUA CHEOL HOON WE GOTTA GO BACK BEFORE OUR CHILDREN LOSE THEIR INNOCENCE
dad GO GO GO!
father it's been 15 minutes
whatwoo are they ok
HOSH i do not want to think of the stuff that may have happened in the past minutes
therock *cat call whistles*
goodgemini sup sol what've u been up to
minghoe where's seungkwan
verdone spEAKIN G ON SEUNDGWAM
memegyu seundgwam? who's she? sounds spicy
hitthekwan mingyu shut ur fuck
memegyu what if my fuck doesn't wanna be shut
whatwoo mingyu stop
verdone ya mingyu leave my BOYFRIEND alone
verdone guys it's been 5 minutes
verdone this is the part where you're supposed to be really surprised and happy for us
dad Ah. Congrats guys.
joshed WOW I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! YOU TWO?!
woozi YA IT'S NOT LIKE WE HAD TO LISTEN TO YOU GUYS MOAN FOR 20 MINUTES
HOSH I NEVER WOULD'VE GUESSED IT
dkcountryreturns VERKWAN LIVES
tallbeagle YAYYYY :33 SO HAPPY FOR U
puppycat how was the basement
memegyu i bet it really set the mood
angelface *sniffles* my babies,,, all grown up,,,
mother *hands tissue* it's okay,,, it's beautiful moment,,,, you should be proud,,,
chachawoo congrats guys! i hope you treat each other well! <3
hitthekwan I JUST FAINTED THANK YUO CHA EUNWOO I FEEL SO BLESSED
verdone KWANNIE OUR RELATIONSHIP HAS JUST BEEN CHRISTENED BY CHA EUNWOO
hitthekwan I LOVE YOU
verdone I LOVE YOU TOO
dino-saur awh what a nice ending
minghoe there is no end.
joshed hhm,,, JUNHAO NEXT
goodgemini joshua pls
joshed THERES HYDROGEN THEN HELIUM THEN LITHIUM BERYLLIUM BORON CARBON EVERYWHERE NITROGEN ALL THROUGH THE AIR OXYGEN SO U CAN BREATHE AND FLORINE FOR YOUR PRETTY TEETH NEON TO LIGHT UP THE SIGNS SODIUM FOR SALTY TIMES MAGNESIUM ALUMINUM SILICON PHOSPHORUS THEN SULFUR CHLORINE AND ARGON POTASSIUM AND CALCIUM SO YOULL GROW STRONG SCANDIUM TITANIUM VANADIUM AND CHROMIUM AND MANGANESE THIS IS THE PERIODIC TABLE NOBLE GAS IS STABLE HALOGENS AND ALKALI REACT AGGRESSIVELY EACH PERIOD WE'LL SEE BEE OUTER SHELLS WHILE ELECTRONS ARE ADDED MOVING TO THE RIGHT IRON IS THE 26TH THEN COBALT NICKEL COINS YOU GET COPPER SINC AND GALLIUM GERMANIUM AND ARSENIC SELENIUM AND BROMINE FILM WHILE KRYPTON HELPS LIGHT UP YOUR ROOM RUBIDIUM AND STRONTIUM THEN YTTRIUM ZIRCONIUM NIOBIUM MOLYBDENUM TECHNETIUM RUTHENIUM RHODIUM PALLADIUM SILVERWARE THEN CADMIUM AND INDIUM TIN CAN ANTIMONY THEN TELLURIUM AND IODINE AND XENON AND THEN CAESIUM AND BARIUM IS 56 AND THIS IS WHERE THE TABLE SPLITS WHERE LANTHANIDES HAVE JUST BEGUN LANTHANUM CERIUM AND PRASEODYMIUM NEODYMIUM IS NEXT TO PROMETHIUM THEN 62 SAMARIUM EUROPIUM GADOLINIUM AND TERBIUM DYSPROSIUM HOLMIUM ERBIUM THULIUM YTTERBIUM LUTETIUM HAFNIUM TANTALUM TUNGSTEN THEN WE'RE ONTO RHENIUM OSMIUM AND IRIDIUM PLATINUM GOLD TO MAKE YOU RICH TILL YOU GROW OLD MERCURY TO TELL YOU WHEN ITS REALLY COLD THALLIUM AND LEAD THEN BISMUTH FOR YOUR TUMMY POLONIUM ASTATINE WOULD NOT BE YUMMY RADON FRANCIUM WILL LAST A LITTLE TIME RADIUM THEN ACIDINES AT 89 THIS IS THE PERIODIC TABLE NOBLE GAS IS STABLE HALOGENS AND ALKALI REACT AGGRESSIVELY EACH PERIOD WE'LL SEE NEW OUTER SHELLS WHILE ELECTRONS ARE TO THE RIGHT ACTINIUM THORIUM PROTACTINIUM URANIUM NEPTUNIUM PLUTONIUM AMERICIUM CURIUM BERKELIUM CALIFORNIUM EINSTEINIUM FERMIUM MENDELEVIUM NOBELIUM LAWRENCIUM RUTHERFORDIUM DUBNIUM SEABORGIUM BOHRIUM HASSIUM MEITNERIUM DARMSTADTIUM ROENTGENIUM COPERNICIUM UNUNTRIUM FLEROVIUM UNUNPENTIUM LIVERMORIUM UNUNSEPTIUM UNUNOCTIUM AND THEN WE'RE DONE
angelface joshua baby why
memegyu what is the point
father i love that song
whatwoo too many big words
joshed get Educated punks
Chapter 3: #exposed
exposing time >:) and kyla massie protection squad and DON'T UNDERAGE DRINK KIDS
STAN PRISTIN PROTECT KYLA MASSIE
also i was inspired by this video: https://www.instagram.com/p/BU4KFazD9SE/ bc my trash ass spotted SVT x ASTRO interactions in the background even tho it really twice and day6 oops anyway thx music bank
and this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lgb2eO1LIWA i can't believe i missed this ISAC video but i've been truly blessed also im still shook from both of their aerobics performances i will Never Recover
also tw for slight underaged drinking? it won't happen again in the fic (maybe) but please if u live in the US and are under 21 DON'T DRINK and if u live in Europe or Asia or anywhere where the age is 18 STILL DON'T DRINK IF YOU ARE UNDER THE LEGAL DRINKING AGE ty stay safe <33
therock LISTEN HERE LOSERS
therock IM DONE
memegyu ru ok
puppycat hyuk calm tf down
therock EVERYONE NEEDS TO KNOW
therock I CAN'T HIDE THIS ANYMORE
verdone wjat is happng
mother minhyuk don't do it
chachawoo minhyuk please
dino-saur is this what i think it is!?
therock CHA EUNWOO
minghoe uwu what's this?
therock IS A MINION FUCKER
hitthekwan oh god not minions
puppycat rcoky why
chachawoo okAY to clarify i am not a minion "fucker"
chachawoo i just like them and think they're cute
chachawoo it's just like u pusheen
minghoe i feel so conflicted right now
HOSH yikEs minions
dkcountryreturns minion aren't that bad? like they're kinda cute?
chachawoo tHANK YOU seokmin
HOSH who is lee seokmin anyway never heard of her
dkcountryreturns sOONYOUNG plS
therock don't you DARE compare pusheen to MINIONS
memegyu "i love minion yaoi,,, and if you don't like that,,, then unfollow me"
joshed im sOBBifn
whatwoo where did that vine go
father im not even kidding i think it's been removed from every social media site
memegyu srsly the author took live 2 hours to find the vine and it was in a fucking twaimz video like what
dad Minhyuk, what did Dongmin do to you for you to result to this.
therock he ate the last piece of cheesecake even when he told me he wouldn't
chachawoo because i DIDN'T
tallbeagle oh the cheesecake?? that was me lol!! it was really yummy~~
angelface oH HABSASH DONGMIN BABE I'MSO SORYR
dino-saur oh how the turns have tabled
dad isn't it oh how the tables have turned?
woozi cheol just appreciate the child's meme
puppycat i cANt BLIevE
tallbeagle wait what's happening? Was there something special about the cake?
therock nothing,,, it's all good babe,,,, i'm gonna just go ok
puppycat THERE'S A SINGLE TEAR RUNNING DOWN MINHYUK'S FACE IM SHTING
tallbeagle i'm so confused D:
joshed it's okay sanha
mother shush child it's okay
angelface don't worry about it :)
verdone guYS WE NEED TO BAND TOGETGER
verdone I AMSO ANGRY RN
hitthekwan why?? :(
angelface i heRAD ABOUT THIS D:<
mother what do we need to do?
father who do we need to kill
verdone everyone on social media >:(
verdone so basically this girl- kyla massie debuted with PRISTIN earlier this year
chachawoo ahh i love pristin!! i'm actually close with eunwoo lol
minhoe gasp i know what ur talking about hansol
tallbeagle we at astro are big fans of pristin! what's wrong?
verdone so kyla is basically my little sister and i love her to death,, she's close with sofia
verdone she's 15 and the maknae of the girls and she is getting so much hate rn i'm gonna scream
hitthekwan idk if u guys have seen but there are a shit ton of people fat-shaming her and hating her bc she weighs more than the other girls and is a HEALTHY weight,,
verdone she's only 15 >:((((
therock *rolls up sleeves* oh hELL NO
whatwoo nayoung and the other girls are pissed iheard
memegyu how do u know
whatwoo i'm cousins w jungkook rmemebr,, i know lots of idols through him
dad You can fan-boy later, let's think of ideas for ways to try to stop them harassing Kyla.
joshed we all have lots of social media influence yeah? let's just use that to boost awareness and bring out supporters
angelface good idea babe i knew accepting ur confession would lead to something good!
joshed u confessed to me,,
angelface ANYWAY i'll start tweeting now!!!!!!
chachawoo a lot of my fans are big fans of music, especially since we're part of astro ent, so we can definitely get ppl to stop harassing her
HOSH i'll post a rant of my youtube
joshed eunwoo or jinjin- can u retweet a tweet of my talking about it in english? So intl fans can know as well
dkcountryreturns rt hansol's too
hitthekwan kyla is from the US so if we can let her home country know they will take big acton
woozi tru international fans are crazy
mother we all will!!
verdone THANK U GUYS IM CRYING
dino-saur changed chatroom name to ' kyla massie protection squad 2k17 '
dino-saur whoop whoop protect little sisters
dkcountryreturns g uys we should all meet up
dkcountryreturns OT19 interactions u know
tallbeagle ya!! chan and i hang out all the time!
minghoe still jealous
therock u guys can probably come to our dorm
puppycat it's pretty big for only 6 people
chachawoo we have a big living room so we can all chill and eat snacks
tallbeagle lemme just ask
tallbeagle mom dad
father yes sanha
mother yes child?
tallbeagle can we have seventeen over?
therock they call themselves seventeen, so we just call them seventeen idk
mother why not
memegyu i wanna see ur dorm
dino-saur i need to ask the parents
angelface I AM HERE MY CHILD AND I SAY YES AND SO DOES JISOO
joshed oh hannie already said it but i think if we can clean up quickly we can go over
woozi my opinion doesn't matter but i wanna see if myungjun and jinwoo are actually taller than me so i'll go
hitthekwan dad we just need u
mother jihoon i'm so sure i'm taller than you
father we may be short but at least we are over 5'8
woozi i change my mind
dad Too late.
chachawoo WELP i'll go buy snacks
puppycat i'll come!!
therock me too!
chachawoo haha no
tallbeagle hyukkie come here we should clean the house a bit!!
joshed jeonghan we should bring snacks or wine or something
angelface aren't we budgeting?
joshed Jeonghan we should bring them snacks and wine and be Good Guests or you're sleeping outside tonight! :)
angelface WE ARE GOING TO THE CORNER STORE WE'LL BRB TO PICK U GUYS UP BE READY IN 15 MINUTES LOVE YOU ALL ESPECIALLY YOU HONG JISOO
dino-saur we're here!!
HOSH why do i see strobe lights
joshed yes han
angelface where is the champagne we brought?
mother ooh u brought champagne?
puppycat ooh champagne?
father not for u mister
puppycat i'm of legal age?
mother mhhm u barely are 19 and we have minors here so i'm not risking it
mother we are going to become american tonight so therefore if u are under 21 no champagne for u
dad Even you Jihoon.
dad Jihoon baby please, it's only fair.
woozi fine but u owe me
dad Of course. <3
angelface that is if we can find the champagne bottle,,
joshed it's gotta be here somehwere!?
goodgemini hao and i have been in the living room talking with bin and dongmin for the past 30 min. so,,
whatwoo if mingyu or i had taken it you'd know bc he'd be vomiting and i'd be crying
mother and that's why we're doin g the 21 rule
woozi seungcheol and I have been with jisoo and jeonghan
dkcountryreturns um hah soonyoung and i are at the grocery store down the street
HOSH i wanted hot cheetos,,,
HOSH u guys want anything?
joshed /MY CHAMPAGNE/
angelface we haven't heard anything from the maknaes,,,
father oh no
mother /OH NO/
memegyu one min i'm getting snapchat out this is going to be priceless
whatwoo mingyu pls
mother I CAN'T BELIEVE MY ANGEL,,, YOON SANHA,,,, WOULD BETRAY ME LIKE THIS,,,
therock hyung it's just champange we have it at weddings all the time
mother I KNEW ROCKY WAS A BAD INFLUENCE ON HIM
angelface MY THREE CHILDREN
angelface YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE RESPONSIBLE ADULTS
joshed i know it was you who stole the bottle in the first place
verdone whWt hOW
joshed first of all neither of the astro boys would EVER
joshed neither would dino bc he is a pure soul
joshed seungkwan is a terrible liar so we'd know by know if it was him
memegyu i cANT bLEIVE YOU GUYS DRANK A WHOLE BOTTLE OF CHAMPAGNE
whatwoo atleast they diluted it with apple juice
HOSH sdjsAH APPLE JUICE
goodgemini i can't believe sanha and dino are knocked out
chachawoo welp i think it's time to get sanha and rocky into bed before they vomit all over our guests
puppycat IM NEVER LETTING MINHYUK LIVE THIS DOWN
puppycat DID YOU SEE HIM LICK SANHA
minghoe eww wtf
goodgemini don't shame him hao it's not like u haven't done it
woozi SOMEBODY SEPERATE VERKWAN NOW PLS
woozi I FEEL LIKE I'M IN A BAD PORNO
dad Well thank you for inviting us over, even though it ended up... interesting.
mother honestly i think you should come over again!
mother after sanha and rocky are ungrounded, of course :)
hitthekwan ewhrha they get grounded hebehe
verdone wkhe groundeded
angelface myungjun, how long are socky grounded for?
mother mmhm a week
angelface well, verkwan will see you guys in 2 weeks? chan will see u in 1 :)
verdone whaths hsDmOM DAD DADCHEOL
woozi leave me out of this u delinquent
hitthekwan whY does chAn get one weekdwc
joshed how much shuold i bet u two pressured him
hitthekwan WeLP sEE yoU gys in two WEKs
angelface thanks again for having us!! <3
mother bye! <3
father good luck
chachawoo haha bye guys
puppycat i love being the middle child
minghoe byE gUYS i LoVE YOU
goodgemini thanks for the food and the acting tips dongmin
dkcountryreturns i like your dorm i'll be back
HOSH haha good luck rocky
memegyu AHhaahs what a great night thanks guys i'm full of blackmain material now :))
puppycat UPDATE: it is a little past 6 am, socky are taking turns vomiting into the the bathtub, turns out the passion fruit scented febreeze works wonders
memegyu how romantic
whatwoo go back to SLEEP mingyu ur moving around woke me up
HOSH uwu what's this?
whatwoo soonyoung shut up u can make fun of being when it's not SIX A.M. on the WEEKEND
HOSH ok~~ sleep well you too~~
Chapter 4: fidget spinners from hell
everyone hates fidget spinners, concerned dads about their dad not acting like a dad, and junhao gets awkward
this chapter was inspired by my grandmother randomly buying me and my sisters fidget spinners, my annoyance at the TOP scandal, and my sudden urge for couple angst!!!
this chapter is kind of a mess but i want to update frequently so here's some trash!!
also i had to put yixing in there bc i miss him and want him to be with exo rn so i'm projecting :((
memegyu guYS MY GRANDMOTHER JUST SENT ME AWHOLE BOX OF FIDGET SPINNERS
memegyu I DON'T EVEN LIK E THEM??
goodgemini how does ur grandmother even know what a fidget spinner is
goodgemini isn't she like 92
joshed excuse me we will not talk about f*dget sp*nners in this household
father I HAD TO CONFISCATE LIKE 3 F*DGET SP*NNERS FROM SANHAS ROOM LAST WEEK
mother i banned them from entering the apartment
therock but mj we could sell them and get rich
mother hyuk dear we have dongmin to support us
mother why else do you think we keep him around
mother also rocky you and sanha are grounded, remember?! go give ur phone to jinwoo
minghoe how much did u get mingyu
memegyu there's like 30 in here?!?!?!
dkcountryreturns if u sell each for like 7 dollars you could get over 200 dollars!! :D
whatwoo there are plenty of dumb sheeple who will pay even more for them
whatwoo sell them for like 12 bucks each
memegyu WONWOO MY DEAR WILL YOU COME LOITER OUTSIDE THE HIGHSCHOOL WITH ME SO WE CAN SELL THEM TO LITTLE TEENAGERS
whatwoo sounds sketchy
whatwoo i'll do it
angelface i'm still shook that ur gramma bought u fidget spinners
woozi BLEEP IT OUT JEONGHAN
angelface sorry jihoonie
angelface f*dget sp*nners
dad They are an abomination.
puppycat i don't think f*dget sp*nners are /that/ bad?? i mean they are too hyped but they don't do any harm
chachawoo bin pls
HOSH THEY ARE TERRIBLE BIN A MISTAKE IS WHAT THEY ARE
goodgemini is that,,, a weed f*dget sp*nner,,,
woozi every day the human race creeps closer to damnation
puppycat but did u see bts is america,,
puppycat they had f*dget sp*nners
whatwoo i'm ashamed to be associated with jeon jungkook rn tbh
chachawoo hoSEOK HAD AN AMERICAN FLAG ONE
chachawoo I ALMOST DECLINED HIS OFFER TO COLLAB BC OF THAT
minghoe ,,,, jung hoseok wants to collab with u ,,,,
chachawoo I WASN'T SUPPOSED TO SAY THAT
puppycat MINNIE WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THAT A MEMBER OF BTS WANTS TO COLLAB W U
puppycat IM HURT :(
chachawoo sorry binnie :( i really wasn't supposed to tell anyone, it was supposed to be a surprise thing for fans and stuff
chachawoo if it makes u feel any better i was going to let you come to the studio w/ me and have you meet him!!
chachawoo also minhao and the rest of you guys i'll let you come to astro ent. and i'll give u a tour if you promise not to tell a SOUL
minghoe u know what that's a deal
dad We wouldn't tell either way, right boys?
HOSH yes dad
dkcountryreturns u got it ;)
woozi i have no other friends to tell
angelface that's depressing
memegyu HEY GUYS I'M BACK
memegyu AND 500 BUCKS RICHER
father wtf /how/
mother didn't u only have like 30 f*dget sp*nners?
memegyu WELL U SEE
memegyu THE SCHOOL THAT I WANT TO IS FULL WITH PRIVILEGED RICH KIDS
memegyu SO THEY PAID FOR LIKE 25 PER SPINNER AND IF THEY WANTED TO BUY MORE THAN ONE THEY'D GIVE ME 50 OR 100 DOLLAR BILLS??
whatwoo tbh it was wild these kids were actually throwing their money at mingyu
angelface that's good you got paid so much!!
angelface because you haven't put in any money towards bills the past few months, so it's time to pay up :)
father I AM SO DONE WITH THE TOP WEED SCANDAL
father LEAVE MY DAD ALONE
dad I am so upset, he was expelled from his military division and he is getting a lot of hate. :(.
woozi lmao just for smoking a bit of weed
woozi ur dads lit
memegyu hahaha bc he probs lit marijuana lolol
woozi ur a master of deduction sherlock
dkcountryreturns back in october even !! :(
angelface hehee top more like POT
HOSH did GD get busted a while ago for drugs as well? idek
joshed G DRUGGIN' AND POT FROM BIG BONG
memegyu honestly i never knew jisoo would be this way and i'm Concerned
whatwoo that's fantastic baby
verdone GUYS IM BACK
hitthekwan WE ARE BACK FROM BEING GROUNDED!
puppycat it's been like 4 days i thought u were supposed to be grounded for 2 weeks and chan a week
memegyu the author felt bad for grounding them and needs more characters to bring more plot in so she decided to unground them early
therock tbh i've been here the whole time
therock just not texting so mj and jinwoo wouldn't yell at me
father not angry just disappointed
tallbeagle i have been asleep for the past two days!!!!
angelface what a beautiful child
memegyu so precious
dkcountryreturns sanha i love u
HOSH tbh me too
tallbeagle awh :3 u guys r making me blush
puppycat mhm minhyuk's getting a little red too
therock nO Im NOt
chachawoo i smelled jealously what's happening
minghoe tbh feel bad for minghyuk bc sanha is Pure and Beautiful and it's hard not to love him
tallbeagle but it's okay because i love minghyuk very very much!! :D
therock SAnHA I LoVE OU
minghoe sigh i wish i had someone like that ://
minghoe but atleast i have a crush!!
whatwoo hao ur actually admitting to having a crush
minghoe lmao yeah it's true
memegyu awh r u gonna confess in the chat?!?!
angelface JOSH IT'S HAPPENING
joshed leMME GET MY CAMARA
dad Come on Minghao! Let's hear the confession.
minghoe what are you guys talking about? they aren't in this chat you silly ppl
HOSH oh shit
dkcountryreturns I HAVE ANXIETY PLS DONT LET THIS BE HAPPENING
chachawoo okay i'm confused
mother oh no
joshed haha! ur right hao silly us! so who's your crush?
minghao i'll tell u ;3
minghao so he's tall and chinese
goodgemini pls continue
minghoe he's a very good dancer and singer :))
dino-saur tell us more!!
minghoe he's older than me and he's hilarious- not to mention he's a total visual :3
minghoe he's also acted in chinese films!
minghoe i'm getting very close with him!
dad So, um, what's his name?
minghoe oh! haha i forgot to tell you guys!
minghoe his name is Zhang Yixing! But I call him Lay :)
hitthekwan yo guys is junhui okay i think he just left the dorm
angelface just let him be kwannie
joshed we're happy to here about this guy haohao! hopefully it goes well for you two!
minghoe thanks jisoo!!
joshed created a new chatroom
joshed named chatroom ' save junhao 2k17 '
joshed added 17 users
17 users entered chatroom
joshed junhui, r u okay
goodgemini of course i'm okay why would i not be fucking okay jisoo
angelface jun, we just want to care for you
father if it makes you feel any better, this lay guy sounds scarily close to you
goodgemini i never even said i liked minghao okay?
goodgemini i've met yixing before,, he's such a great dude
goodgemini like, he's actually perfect
goodgemini not a single flaw
goodgemini of course hao would like him, who wouldn't
dino-saur jun hyung we think you're perfect too!!
chachawoo junhui i guarantee that if minghao knew you liked him, he'd be okay with it
puppycat tbh if i wasn't in love with dongmin i'd date u
chachawoo and visa versa !
dad I think Minghao is trying to find a replacement for you.
goodgemini haha funny joke seungcheol
verdone jun maybe u should start hinting to hao that you're interested
woozi yeah,, u don't really show ur emotions that well so there's a likely chance that he doesn't even know you like him
HOSH jihoon r u actual lecturing someone one showing their emotions
mother ANYWAY jun maybe you should see if yixing is actually interested in minghao as well
father and if he isn't, try and see if when he and minghao hang out, he can try and make u look good
joshed and if worst comes to worst we can get u a "girlfriend" or "boyfriend" and make minghao jealous
goodgemini ,,, i like that
angelface damnit jisoo that soundslike a terrible idea
dkcountryreturns i think it would work though!!
dino-saur guys we shoul go back to the original chat so minghao isn't suspicious of all of us being inactive at once!
18 users exited chatroom
18 users entered chatroom ' kyla massie protection squad 2k17 '
goodgemini changed joshed username to ' jisooschrist '
verdone changed chatroom name to ' OT19 '
HOSH guys we should go to that cafe that hao's boy toy works at and have a huge date
HOSH like everyone is with their bf's
goodgemini or gf's
dkcountryreturns ya that sounds fun!!
whatwoo i'm up for it
minghoe ha ha ha ya ! fun !
jisooschrist we can plan that later, right now seventeen we need to leave
angelface jisoo booked us time at the local studio so we can test out the recording tech!!
chachawoo u guys should come to astro next time!! i can book u a slot!!
woozi cha eunwoo i love u
hitthekwan also look jisoo and jeonnghan's users kinda match
hitthekwan jesus and angel ahhaha
verdone jisoos christ blesses us with recording studio time
dad Couple goals.
dino-saur when dad approves
memegyu [image] look at this pic of jihoon staring at dad's ass
woozi kim mingyu i am going to actually kill you in your sleep
dad Okay! Time to go kids!
father lol good luck
private chat with minghoe and layspotatochips
minghoe YIXING WE HAVE A PROBLEM MY FRIENDS WANT TO MEET U NEXT WEEK
layspotatochips ye so?
minghoe I JUST TOLD THEM THE LIE ABOUT ME LIKING U
minghoe AND JUNHUI KNOWS
minghoe HE BARELY EVEN REACTED
layspotatochips my dude,,, it's okay,,, we can just make him jealous when they come next week
minghoe ohh good idea!!
layspotatochips also it's good bc i heard ur friends w/ cha eunwoo and i want to get an autograph to give to joonmyun
minghoe oh ya!! is suho ok w/ me pretending to like u?! i don't want him to be angry or jealous :((
layspotatochips no my dude,, he hella ships u and junhui and wants u to be together,,, this is with his full consent lmao
minghoe heehe good! i look forward to next week then!
layspotatochips lmao sounds good /babe/
goodgemini entered ' save junhui 2k17 '
goodgemini y'all i think i'll bring a girl,,, i don't like girls but i think that will make things more spicy ye?
goodgemini i feel like hao will be more spooked :0
memegyu ur so evil jun
memegyu i like that
Chapter 5: sips 78 gallons of tea
junhao ;)) and Seventeen debut? oh hoh hoh ;)
HAPPY JUN DAY I CAN'T BELIEVE HE'S 21 HE'S ALMOST 6 YEARS OLDER THAN ME YIKES! BUT I HOPE HIS DAY WAS AMAZING
also i'm this update took so long,, kudos to all u chat fic or crack writers bc this is so hard because i am one of the most unfunny people in existence and even coming up with sucky humor is hard :// but that's ok!! bc it's fun!!
so if this isn't funny,,, oops
also in this chapter i mention some stuff about companies that is probably most likely totally incorrect it just helps with the plot so just go with it!! for example trainees spend years preparing to debut and they work their asses off, but for this sake of this fic some will train for a significantly shorter time and debut so please do not get butthurt because i totally acknowledge how hard trainee life is!!
HOSH TODAY IS THE DAY
dkcountryreturns WHERE WE GET TO MEET LAY
hitthekwan WHO IS HAOHAO'S NEW BAE
woozi this will definitely go astray
dad But it will all be okay!
dino-saur it will also be gay!
angelface there'll be drama, by the way
jisooschrist wait are we going to a cafe?
minghoe we are!! anyway,,
goodgemini i'm taking the chevrolet
minghoe not going with the rest of us? why won't you stay?
goodgemini i have to take the freeway
whatwoo what he's trying to convey
memegyu is that he's bringing a girl to the gourmet
verdone for a date i daresay!
goodgemini i said i'd meet her halfway
jisooschrist we should arrive there midday
dino-saur i'm gonna get a parfait!
minghoe he he u guys sure u don't want subway?
minghoe u don't have to come if u don't want to, ok?
angelface nonsense! I want to see this lay that u have on display!
dad This will turn out fine, that I pray.
memegyu junhui bring ur girl a bouquet!
mother honestly how do they even do that
father that was the most satisfying this i've read
tallbeagle hehe did u guys read it outloud like i did?
chachawoo honestly friendship goals
puppycat im shook
therock do you guys know who jun is bringing?
therock like ik he's bringing a girl but,,
puppycat IM PMING U
private chat room with puppycat and therock
puppycat MINHYUK U CAN'T SAY ANYTHING IN THE MAIN CHAT BECAUSE MINGHAO IS IN IT
puppycat USE UR BRAIN BRO
therock ok ok sorry dude i 4got
puppycat yo it's fine we just gotta keep the plan
puppycat he's bringing a girl,, zhou jieqiong?? u know her,, kyulkyung! she's chinese and in pristin, so she and jun are really close.. but only a few know this, and i heard this from dongmin, but she's gay as fuck so they def aren't together. she's been dating nayoung since before their debut so,,,
puppycat like only jun and probs seungcheol know
therock ohhhh ya kyulkyung is probably the best person for this then
puppycat ya but dude pls don't tell i don't need dongmin getting upset,,, it makes me upset when he's upset
puppycat rocky,, everytime sanha's name is even mentioned u freak out,,, pls
therock ,,,,,, no
puppycat ?? yes?
puppycat y r u even my best friend
dino-saur created a new chatroom
dino-saur named chatroom ' updates on the septuple date + chan '
dino-saur added 6 users
dino-saur u guys should know what's going on!
dino-saur and also i'm the only one here without a significant other, fake or not so i might as well talk to u guys lol!
tallbeagle i would've been ur date chan :(
therock hahaha No You Wouldn't Have
chachawoo what's happened so far chan?
dino-saur so basically we get to the cafe and yixing meets us at the door, and minghao jumps in and hugs him (tbh it was really awkward but anyway)
dino-saur junhui isn't here yet, so lay brings us to a private room bc there's so many of us lol
mother sorry to interrupt but speaking of lots of people and private rooms
father myungjun in u say anything about a strip club i'm divorcing u
therock u guys aren't even MARRIED
mother jinwoo shut up i was suggesting that all 19 of us go out for like a super nice dinner and dress up and shit
tallbeagle i like that idea!
dino-saur that sounds fun!! i'll ask mom and dad and mom and dad
dino-saur but anyway we're sitting down and talking with lay, he's super nice and he keeps talking about his bestfriend suho a /lot/ so i see drama
dino-saur OAKOAK jun is here with kyulkyung from pristin and everyone is frEAKINgOUT
dino-saur bc we didn't know who he was bringing in and kyulkyung is kyulkyung so!!!!!!
dino-saur like jeonghan gasped out loud, wonwoo smiled, jihoon choked, hansol and seungkwan are pinching each other, seungcheol is just smirking???, mingyu is fanning himself, soonyoung just fake passed out into seokmin's lap and seokmin is trying to discreetly wipe away tears,, jisoo has his eyes closed- i think he's praying????
tallbeagle lol! i wonder what's gonna happen
mother im kinda sweating from this and i'm not even there
dino-saur ahh minghao is just not moving?? lay just tried to snap him out of it but minghao's eyes are like frozen on jun's hand on kyulkyung's waist
dino-saur okaokay so everyone's sat down and we're ordering brunch
puppycat i love brunch
chachawoo we should go out for brunch some time binnie!
dino-saur kyulkyung is introducing herself and jun is being v affectionate i'm kind of cringing
dino-saur OH SHIT NOW LAY IS BEING AFFECTIONATE WITH HAO
dino-saur IT'S LIKE A COMPETITION OF WHO'S THE CUTER COUPLE
dino-saur oh thank god i'm not the only one here uncomfortable
dino-saur mingyu just lowkey gagged
dino-saur woozi and seungcheol are trying to distract themselves with tic tac toe
chachawoo i'm shaking
father i literally just made myself some popcorn this is so entertaining
mother aren't u supposed to be recording,,
father ,,, yes
dino-saur wonwoo i'm pretty sure is sleeping
dino-saur jisoo and jeonghan are literally playing patty cake underneath the table WhAt Is HaPpEnInG
puppycat couple goals
therock are they kissing or what?
tallbeagle shhh minhyuk lolol
dino-saur only like pecks on the cheek from both couples, everyone looks so uncomf doing so tho
dino-saur our food is here thank gof
tallbeagle what did u get??
dino-saur who do u think i am of course i got french toast
tallbeagle hehe i know~~
mother by the way did u all eat this morning?? our manager wants us to eat every meal so we can stay healthy
therock sanha and i had pancakes
puppycat ya i went out with sua today
father ,,, i'm eating popcorn rn ,,,
mother god damn it jinwoo come over i'm making u a veggie omelette
dino-saur oh UM JUN LITERALLY JUST WHISPERED TO HIMSELF 'FUCK IT' APOLOGIZED TO KYULKYUNG AND KISSED HER STRAIGHT ON THE MOUTH
dino-saur EVERYONE IS SILENT
dino-saur KYULKYUNG LOOKS LIKE SHE'S GONNA VOMIT
dino-saur MINGHAO JUST RAN OUT OF THE ROOM
dino-saur JUN JUST RAN AFTER HIM
therock I NEED SOME AIR
puppycat I'M HYPERVENTILATING
mother MMHM THIS TEA
chachawoo IS THIS A DRAMA BC I'M PRETTY SURE I'VE READ THIS SCRIPT
father my popcorn bowl is refilled
dino-saur HOLY SHIT
dino-saur U WON'T BELIEVE THIS
dino-saur LAY IS EXPLAINING THAT HIM AND MINGHAO LIKING EACH OTHER WAS FAKE
dino-saur APPARENTLY MINGHAO THOUGHT JUN DIDN'T LIKE HIM SO HE WANTED TO MAKE HIM JEALOUS AND LAY IS ACTUALLY PERFECT AND KIND OF LIKE JUN SO THEY THOUGHT IT WOULD BE PERFECT
dino-saur AND KYULKYUNG IS EXPLAINING TO LAY THAT SHE'S ALSO NOT WITH JUN? SHE'S WITH NAYOUNG??
mother I KNEW THEY WERE TOO CLOSE TO BE PLATONIC
dino-saur JEONGHAN IS CRYING JISOO LITERALLY BROUGHT HIS CAMERA AND TRYING TO SNEAK PICTURES OF JUNHAO TALKING IT OUT WONWOO IS STILL ASLEEP JIHOON IS LITERALLY JUST EATING HIS BREAKFAST LIKE NOTHING HAS HAPPENED THIS IS WILD
dino-saur VERKWAN AND SOONSEOK ARE TRADING MONEY I THINK THEY BET ON THIS
tallbeagle who won?
dino-saur verkwan!! they bet that junhao were both trying to make eachother jealous and soonseok thought that lay and hao really had a thing
dino-saur turns out lay's best friend suho is actually his boyfriend, and it was his idea for lay to help minghao because he ships mingao and jun together lololol
puppycat who doesn't ship them together though,,,
father they are such a Great Ship
chachawoo lolol china line of seventeen,,
dino-saur JUNHAO ARE BACK
dino-saur AND HOLDING HANDS
dino-saur EVERYONE IS CLAPPING
therock MY ANXIETY IS CURED MY CROPS ARE HARVESTED CLIMATE CHANGE IS SOLVED GAY MARRIAGE IS LEGAL IN SOUTH KOREA MY EYELINER IS SHARP MY WIG IS SNATCHED MY LIFE IS COMPLETE
mother mmhm that was enough drama to keep me satisfied for at most 2 days :)
father mj u scare me sometimes
mother i love u
' OT19 '
goodgemini hello :)
dino-saur btw guys i updated astro bois about everything that happened so they know all!!
tallbeagle CONGRATS GUYS I'VE SHIPPED IT SINCE DAY 1!!!! :D
chachawoo minghao!! glad u got ur man!!
minghoe THANK U CHA EUNWOO IT MEANS A LOT
father where's the rest of u guys?
goodgemini they literally all fell asleep in the car bc of the 'sheer amount of drama that took place in under 45 minutes'
minghoe so we left them in the car
minghoe they'll wake up soon
goodgemini hopefully not
hitthekwan do u guys know that some companies literally have children recruiters?
HOSH lol what?
chachawoo my company has done that, the kids have parents in the business so they send their kids to school or to a playground and scout talented children so the trainees can start as soon as possible? it's kinda weird
hitthekwan bc this 15 year old just came up to me when i was at panera eating my mac and cheese and handed me a business card saying she's seen the seventeen youtube videos and her company wants to quickly train and debut us? she said that we all are very talented and becoming a boy group would make us very successful?!?
dad Seungkwan, what company?!?
hitthekwan Pledis? it sounds v familiar
verdone babe,,,, that's pristin's and nu'est's label,,,, holy shit
angelface KWANNIE GIVE ME THE BUSINESS CARD
jisooschrist y'all if we sign with them we don't have to rent out that crappy studio,,,
puppycat u guys will have to train,, but since u have experience it may be short?? like u already have a fanbase so they might be eager to debut u
father i think i guys should do it! the entertainment business is tiring but rewarding!!
mother i think you should do it well,, but u have to be careful
mother the pd's will be okay with fanservice and skinship, but u guys have to be ok with hiding that ur in relationships. U also have to appeal to ur female audience, which means u twinks have to pretend like ur straight. also be prepared to be shipped w/ ppl who are not ur significant other and try not to make things awkward? also stay away from scandals bc those are the worst and will haunt u forever no joke
mother but other than that u guys should totally debut you guys would kill it!!
woozi CHEOL WE NEED TO DO THIS I HAVE SO MUCH MUSIC WRITTEN THAT COULD BE USED
dkcountryreturns ive always wanted to travel across the world,, if we get popular enough we can tour all different places
whatwoo we'd have enough money to easier pay for rent and groceries,,
HOSH I'M SHAKING THIS IS CRAZY
dino-saur guys!!!!! this is unreal!!!!!
memegyu i call being the visual
angelface try me mingyu,,,
memegyu secOND VISUAL
jisooschrist i'm calling the number that they gave to kwan
minghoe im trembling
goodgemini iM CALLING MY MOM
dad Guys, let's not get too excited. We don't even know if they'll actually sign us, so let's not get our hopes up.
angelface i'm sorry
dino-saur oh no :(
whatwoo so much for groceries
jisooschrist BUT THEY SAID THEY'LL HAVE US IN THE OFFICE ON WEDNESDAY TO SIGN US A CONTRACT
jisooschrist WE'LL TRAIN FOR 1-2 MONTHS JUST TO LEARN HOW TO BE AN IDOL BC WE ALREADY KNOW HOW TO SING AND DANCE AND THEN WE'LL DEBUT
HOSH I'M ACTUALLY SOBBING
dkcountryreturns BBY WE'RE DOING IT
tallbeagle YAYYY GUYS I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU
therock WE'RE COMING OVER
mother WE'RE BRINGING CHAMPAGNE
father CHILDREN U CAN HAVE A LITTLE JUST BECAUSE WE'RE CELEBRATING
verdone I CAN'T BREATHE
memegyu THIS DOESN'T REALLY MAKE SENSE BECAUSE IT IS NO WAY POSSIBLE FOR SOMEONE TO TRAIN SO LITTLE AND DEBUT SO FAST BUT THE AUTHOR WANTED MORE EXCITEMENT TO THE PLOT SO SHE BENT REALITY SORRY BUT YAY SEVENTEEN AS AN IDOL GROUP
dad GUYS I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS IS HAPPENING
dad MAKE SURE TO CALL UR FAMILIES AND TELL THEM THE NEWS
hitthekwan I CAN'T SEE THROUGH MY OWN TEARS
chachawoo i'm so happy for u guys!!!!!! we have to collab or something!!!!!
puppycat GOOD LUCK GUYS U GUYS ARE GONNA BE SUCH A SUCCESS I KNOW IT
hitthekwan ok i know it's like 3 am and everyone's asleep but,,,
hitthekwan bc we're going to be idols,,, this is the perfect to bring out my talent as the /variety master/
hitthekwan THE TSUNAMI SKIT IS GOING TO BE SO LIT JUST YOU WAIT
Chapter 6: ahhhh (AHHHH)
famous cousins uwu, PROTECT BOO SEUNGKWAN, and where's jisoo lol
i got a request for wonwoo's cousin!jungkook so u asked and i served!!! i hope u don't mind me adding jimin bc he's my bts bias and he's precious
also this chapter i'm not happy with so i'm sorry if it's dull or boring!!
it's so hot in massachusetts rn i think i sweat like 2 gallons writing this,,, rip me
whatwoo added 2 users to ' OT19 '
whatwoo whatever u do
whatwoo don't freak out
johnCOCK HELLO BITCHES
babyboi-min *intense CL music*
minghoe is that
puppycat WHO I THINK IT IS
memegyu oh hey jeongguk hey jimin
johnCOCK yo gyu what's up
chachawoo oh hey guys!! y r u here?
babyboi-min hey eunwoo!! wonwoo added us! we wanted to congratulate seventeen!
therock um guys
therock bin just fainted
therock like he's literally unresponsive on the floor
HOSH YOYOYO JUNGKOOK WHAT IS UP MY MAN
HOSH THE NAME'S SOONYOUNG
HOSH UR A LEGEND
angelface omg park jimin u are so precious
angelface JISOO CAN WE ADOPT HIM
jisooschrist jeonghan he's the same age as us that wouldn't work
angelface I DON'T CARE HE'S ADORABLE
hitthekwan omg jimin sunbaenim
babyboi-min omg boo seungkwan
hitthekwan your vocals,,, are so good,,, i love u
babyboi-min but seungkwan,, YOUR vocals,,, are so good,,, i love U
verdone ahem hello i am hansol vernon chwe,, seungkwan's boyfriend
johnCOCK ahem i believe jimin is taken, seungkwan
dad I don't understand how jealously somehow breaks this chat platform, it's amazing.
dino-saur ahhh hey jimin hyung and jeongguk hyung
goodgemini HOW DO U KNOW LIKE EVERY IDOL
mother it's because he's absolutely adorable and when he was out with us at astro ent. we couldn't help but introduce him to idols
father everyone loves him no matter what
dkcountryreturns that's so true
verdone sorry jungkook, seungkwan would never go after another dude's man- even if he wasn't dating me
johnCOCK dude, same with jimin,, it's all cool,, bros?
puppycat i'm awake!!
puppycat and wow that was kinda beautiful ngl
puppycat ALSO HELLO JUNGKOOK SUNBAENIM I'M A HUGE FAN
minghoe he's literally an actual huge fan,, in their vlive's he's always singing ur parts and stuff
johnCOCK that was u??? moon bin??? dude ur amazing
puppycat THANK U SUNBAENIM I'M JUST GONNA GO GET A GLASS OF WATER BYE
therock he fainted again i'm just gonna go bring him to dongmin
chachawoo good idea
whatwoo jeongguk u have like 45 minutes before i'm kicking u and jimin out
johnCOCK the reason i was added was just bc i wanted to congratulate seventeen on signing with Pledis and starting training!!! once u guys debut we'll probably be seeing u alot more, so i just wanted to meet u and say hi and stuff
johnCOCK also our bts gc is super dead because everyone just sleeps when we aren't promoting
babyboi-min it's true lol
memegyu speaking of sleeping
memegyu wonwoo u need to lay on my bed again
memegyu bc it's starting not to smell of u :(
woozi yikes that's gay
dad Jihoon, you're gay.
memegyu jihoon stfu we're all gay
goodgemini no joke, everyone in this chat is gay for eachother except for chan
dino-saur hee hee
tallbeagle it's okay chan!! u don't need a partner to be happy! <3
angelface JISOO HOW ABOUT ADOPTING SANHA HE'S ADORABLE
angelface :( sorry myungjun he's just so cute
mother he is isn't he
johnCOCK wait that's actually insane
johnCOCK how does it happen that everyone is gay for each other ( minus chan)
therock idek maybe the gay gods looked down on us one day and was like 'hey they look pretty gay' so one day they said fuck it and changed fate so we would all end up friends with eachother in the end
verdone thank u gay gods
father if it makes things more clear, we can tell u who's together?
dad Good idea Jinwoo. Chan how about you tell Jeongguk and Jimin?
dino-saur from ASTRO we have- jinwoo and myungjun (myungjin), dongmin and bin (binwoo), and minhyuk and sanha (socky)!!
jisooschrist honestly every astro ship is perfect
jisooschrist there are no flaws
woozi tbh so true
babyboi-min YES kookie pls remind me to get money from seokjin hyung bc he bet that moonrock was real but IM BINWOO AND SOCKY 24/7
therock being moon bin's best friend is hard i could never be his boyfriend
therock i honestly pity dongmin sometimes
chachawoo :( it's a tough life sometimes
puppycat OK RUDE
dino-saur and of seventeen!
HOSH babe this is our moment
dkcountryreturns our time to shine
HOSH babe you shine all the time with the adorable smile of yours <3
dkcountryreturns babe <3
dino-saur we have jihoon and seungcheol (jicheol), jeonghan and jisoo (jihan), junhui and minghao (junhao), seokmin and soonyoung (soonseok), hansol aka vernon and seunkwan (verkwan), and lastly wonwoo and mingyu (meanie) ?????? idk really about meanie they are kinda unstable and we are working on the admitting feelings part but we definitely can prove from the sound that comes from their room occasionally that they are sexually active
memegyu okay CHAN that's quite ENOUGH don't you THINK
whatwoo wow suddenly i have a thing at the thing that the thing invited me to goodbye
johnCOCK SIPS TEA
johnCOCK mingyu is he good in bed
johnCOCK no seriously i need to know if he's better in bed than me
johnCOCK it's for science
babyboi-min i think ur great in bed kook
mother OKAY BOYS WE HAVE CHILDREN IN THIS CHAT
tallbeagle lol i just turned 17!
angelface I'M CRYING IN THE CLUB YOU'RE SO SMOL
dino-saur he's even younger than me lol!
tallbeagle i'm still taller than most of you though!
woozi wow ok
puppycat did he just casually roast more than half of this chatroom
jisooschrist im cry ing
dad Guys, the only person here who is taller than him is Mingyu.
memegyu hah losers
tallbeagle u have my respect mingyu hyung
memegyu u sEE THAT LOSERS I HAVE YOON SANHA'S RESPECT THIS IS THE HIGHEST POINT OF MY LIFE
HOSH minhyuk how does it feel dating a giant
therock don't talk to me im brooding
tallbeagle :((( minhyukkie
therock brooding?!??! who's she!??!?! i love having a tall boyfriend!!!!!
verdone the effect that sanha has on everyone is slightly disconcerting but u know what it's ok
johnCOCK ya dude if i wasn't dating jiminie i'd probably go for sanha
therock oKAY LISTEN UP
whatwoo OKAY HYUNGS IT'S TIME TO LEAVE SAY GOODBYE AU REVOIR ANNYEONG SAYONARA ADIOS
whatwoo has removed 2 users from ' OT19 '
puppycat honestly that was the best 45 minutes of my life
jisooschrist y'all i always knew those two were together
dad JIHOON STOP
HOSH WE ARE DEBUTING NEXT WEEK
HOSH I JUST REALIZED
woozi tbh i got a little choked up reading that
chachawoo i'm am so excited for you guys!! u guys are lucky u are training for so short
hitthekwan i am Suffering
hitthekwan I HAVEN'T EATEN A SLICE OF PIZZA IN LIKE 2 MONTHS
hitthekwan MY MANAGER IS MAKING ME FEEL SO BAD AS SHEs FORCING THESE GREEN LEAVES DOWN MY THROAT
father do u mean lettuce
hitthekwan i DONT SEE ANYONE ELSE DIETING LIKE WE'RE ABOUT TO GO TO THE OLYMPICS
hitthekwan LIKE YEAH I GET IT I'M CHUBBY BUT GIVE ME SOME PEACE :( IT'S LIKE I NEED TO CHANGE MY WHOLE BEING TO DEBUT I DON'T KNOW IF I CAN DO IT ANYMORE
angelface kwannie :(( u aren't chubby! and you belong with us!!!!!!!
jisooschrist your body is perfect just the way it is!
hitthekwan tell that to manager-nim :(((
HOSH kwannie we wouldn't be SVT without you!!
woozi seungkwan your vocals are one of the reasons we got signed in the first place
minghoe you're our moodmaker!!
dad Seungkwan, please don't ever put yourself down like that. We all love you just the way you are, and you shouldn't take what our manager and the company says to heart. We would not be who we are today without you.
mother I know that the staff can really be harsh, but like seungcheol said, don't take it too personally
tallbeagle please don't let them change you seungkwan!! you are amazing how you are now!!
chachawoo this is just the beginning of your journey through fame and media,, you will get criticism from many, but learning how to and getting over than and learning how to ignore it and move on it a lovely trait to have. you're wonderful seungkwan, fighting!!!
dkcountryreturns kwan we would be so lost without u :((
whatwoo we would be hilariously unfunny without u
memegyu you're our boo boo seungkwan
father stay strong little bro
dino-saur :((((( kwan pls keep doing what you're doing,, i'll sneak u in some pepero
verdone listen when I say I love u, boo seungkwan, I mean that I will do everything I can to make sure that you becomes the star that you deserve to be and be appreciated by everyone for your talent, personality, looks, everything,,, you are my best friend and if you quit, i'll quit because i just can't do this without u,, you're so easy going and a lovely person even though sometimes u annoy but in all that just makes me love u more,, you have the most beautiful heart and i wouldn't be who i am today without you seungkwan so please take care of yourself and come to me whenever you're feeling down because i can't stand it when you're sad i love you
therock is anyone else crying because i am
angelface i love my children so much this is the most lovely thing i have ever witness jisoo get me some tissues my eyes are leaking i've never been so proud to be parents what's wrong with me
dad Hansol that was the nicest thing you've ever texted/said/done. I'm proud.
woozi even i'm crying what the fuck
memegyu same and guys the author didn't mean for this to get all serious but then she was just thinking of boo seungkwan and how under appreciated he is and hoe he deserves the world and she accidently started tearing up while vernon was confessing how much he cares for kwan and now she's a mess
hitthekwan CHWE HANSOL COME TO MY ROOM AND BRING TISSUES AND LIKE 8 ROMCOMS AND MAYBE SOME POPCORN BECAUSE UR NOT LEAVING THIS ROOM FOR ATLEASY 12 HOURS I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I FEEL LIKE I'M ABOUT TO BURST
hitthekwan ALSO THE REST OF YOU THANK U SM I AM SO TOUCHED AND I LOVE YOU ALL AS WELL
angelface we love u!! <3
angelface guys have u seen jisoo?
angelface i just woke up and he isn't in our bed? but he usually sleeps in later than me? especially since we debuted he's been sleeping like a rock,,,
dad I haven't seen him, did you check the living room and the kitchen?
dkcountryreturns i've been in both this morning and he wasn't there
goodgemini he isn't at the gym downstairs either
HOSH he's not in the bathroom bc i'm currently in the bathroom lol
dino-saur maybe he went for a walk?
verdone i don't think so,, usually he takes his guitar with him so he can play for the people at the park
chachawoo what a sweet human being
whatwoo he isn't anywhere near the lobby of our apartment?
memegyu also not at the grocery store, i was just there to get stuff to restock the fridge
woozi did u get yogurt
angelface THIS IS NO TIME FOR YOGURT MY BOYFRIEND IS MISSING AND I'M PANICKING
hitthekwan mom please calm down
angelface I CAN'T WHAT IF HE'S LOST WHAT IF HE'S HURT WHAT IF HE'S CHEATING ON ME THE POSSIBILITIES ARE ENDLESS
dad Jeonghan, Joshua would never cheat on you. He loves you too much.
angelface IDK?? DID U SEE THE WAY WINWIN FROM NCT WAS LOOKING AT HIM AT SHOW CHAMPION?? WINWIN IS ADORABLE OF COURSE JISOO WOULD GO TO HIM
mother jeonghan, please calm down. would u like to come to our dorm for some tea? it would calm your nerves
dino-saur also winwin looks at taeyong like he's the sun so i don't think he's likely to have an affair with ur boyfriend mom lol
father minhyuk and i can go out and look for joshua if u want as well
minghoe i just found his phone on the counter, but his laptop is gone
angelface OH GOD DID SOMEONE IDOL-NAP HIM LAST TIME AND TAKE HIS LAPTOP AS WELL?!?!?!?
mother ooohkay jeonghan we are coming over to pick u up and ur going to take a nice bath okay? i have vanilla incense and bath salts that you're gonna love
angelface :(( ok,,,
jisooschrist omg guys im at the starbucks that is like a 10 minute walk away from our apartment,,, my mom emailed me and i wanted to sit down for a bit and relax with a coffee while i talked to her,, jeonghannie i even woke you up to tell u i was leaving,,, i'm fine guys don't worry hahaha i can text on my macbook so u still could've contacted me even though i left my phone at home
angelface i thought u were DEAD :(( i was going to vlive crying and have the fans have a memorial for you,,, :((
jisooschrist hannie :,) i'm fine,, you're so dramatic
angelface i hate u :((((
jisooschrist i love you <3333
angelface i love u too <3333
dino-saur our family is so problematic,,, but ily guys <3
Chapter 7: aahaha what
hoshi Almost Died and jisoo is cringey
HAPPY BIRTHDAY KWON SOONYOUNG U BEAUTIFUL RAY OF SUNSHINE EVEN THOUGH UR BORTHDAY WAS LIKE YESTERDAY BUT WHATEVER
anyway so i tried to make this chapter more soonyoung centered bc he is Birthed
also sorry it's so short! finals are this week [ they started today :((( ] and next week so my schedule is Tight and Stressful,, hopefully next chapter will be longer and funnier bc i pulled this right out of my ass today. well if u also have finals good luck!!! eat well and get a good night's sleep!!! take care of yourselves!!!
chachawoo guys thanks for agreeing to come meet us in the city!!
tallbeagle i'm so excited to see u guys again!
verdone yo i was promised food
hitthekwan ur so classy hansol
dad Where are we meeting?
mother how about the mcdonalds down the street from our building? we can get food while we mingle
minghoe IM GETTING 5 MCFLURRIES NO ONE CAN STOP ME
goodgemini can i have one
goodgemini sometimes i wonder if we're actually dating
minghoe sorry babe
minghoe NO <3
therock i'm broke can someone buy me food
father minhyuk u are in no way broke
tallbeagle i'll buy u food hyuk!!
mother SANHA DON'T LET HIM ABUSE UR MONEY FOR THIS
angelface SAVE IT FOR COLLEGE
woozi cheol can u buy me fries
dad Sure, Jihoon.
woozi thanks <3
therock why can seungcheol buy jihoon food but sanha can't buy me food?
whatwoo well he's the dad he can whatever he wants
puppycat and sanha is younger than you and more precious and u have more money than him u should be buying HIM food
tallbeagle minhyuk can u buy me an icecream sundae!?!? it has hot fudge!!!!!!
therock ,,,,, of course sanha
tallbeagle :D !!!! <333
dkcountryreturns we are on our way!!
HOSH guys sorry i left i'm having a craving for hot cheetos
dino-saur soonyoung u can't stand hot or spicy things??
HOSH idek hot cheetos r addicting and i can't stop eating them even though i'm in pain?
jisooschrist that is slightly concerning
dkcountryreturns where are u going?
HOSH idk i'm walking around the city looking for a store
chachawoo there's a drugstore like 2 minutes away, u should go there
angelface pls be safe
woozi if someone tries to grab u bite them
minghoe or kick their dick
minghoe hahah that rhymed
dad Hopefully nothing will happen for it to get to that point.
father there's not much crime that happens around here so i think ur fine soonyoung
therock the only crime here is how gorgeous i look in skinny jeans ;) should be illegal how hot i am
mother im putting u up for adopting
mother and filing a restraining order so u can't go anywhere near sanha
woozi cheol and i will take sanha no charge
mother I Think Not
angelface nice try jihoon if anyone was to get sanha from myungjun and jinwoo it would be me and jisoo
angelface can we be his godparents so if u guys suddenly die or something we can take him?
father that is a little frightening
mother dude sure
mother always need a backup plan
woozi seungcheol why are u best friends with jeonghan he's so mean to me:(
dad Sorry, can't control him. He's a beast.
angelface gasp jisoo baby defend me
jisooschrist but it's true? you can be v scary sometimes
jisooschrist but i love you for it with all my heart
memegyu they really are a sappy married couple
memegyu just get married u hoes
puppycat woah plot twist
jisooschrist i mean, why not?? couples are getting married and having kids at our age anyway? i mean we'll be 22 soon
mother I HAVE TEARS
angelface jiSOO BABY
angelface I THOUGHT YOU'D BE AGAINST MARRIAGE
hitthekwan MOM AND DAD !!!!!! WHAT IS HAPPENING !!!!!
jisooschrist we'd have to go to the states for it to be legal,,, but my mom is there anyway? i mean if jeonghan is up for it i'm willing to basically have a secret marriage in the states lol
whatwoo my head is spinning what
angelface !?!?!?!? i
angelface yes ?!?!?!
HOSH um guys
HOSH i'm really sorry to interrupt bc i am so PUMPED if u guys get married but
HOSH i'm lost
dkcountryreturns soonie it's been like an hour?!? r u safe?!?!
HOSH yeah? i think? i got like 8 bags of hot cheetos from a creepy gas station that a random bus took me to and idk where i am now
verdone soonyoung it's getting dark
dkcountryreturns oh good soonyoung
chachawoo can u look for street signs?
HOSH i'm walking down the street now, there's a sign like 100 meters down
tallbeagle yeah tell us what street you are on and we can tell you where u are and we can pick u up!!
angelface i'm putting u on house arrest soonyoung
jisooschrist how about we just use the buddy rule,,
angelface amazing idea jisoo, you are wonderful <3333
HOSH ok i hate to interrupt mom and dad again but THERE IS A SMALL HUMANOID FIDURE FOLLOWING ME IN ALL BLACK AND I'M SCARED
memegyu /walk faster!!/
HOSH WHEN I SPEED UP THEY SPEED UP
HOSH OH GOD I'M AT A CROSSWALK AND THE LIGHTS GREEN IM CORNERED
HOSH WHAT IF THEY TAKE MY HOT CHEETOS
dkcountryreturns SOONYOUNG DON'T WORRY ABOUT THE FOOD WORRY ABOUT UR SAFETY YOU DUMBASS
woozi oh shit seokmin just swore
dkcountryreturns I'M SORRY I'M STRESSED ABOUT MY BOYFRIEND'S SAFETY LEAVE ME ALONE
mother soonyoung can you tell us the street you're on
HOSH IT'S WASHINGTON AVENUE!?!?!?
father oh you're a ten minute drive away
father c'mon ppl get in the minivan
goodgemini ,,,, u have a minivan
minghoe ffs junhui don't car shame them when soonyoung may be in danger
goodgemini ,, ok ok
goodgemini but a minivan? a toyota? atleast get a honda odyssey ://
whatwoo jun there is something not right about that brain of yours
HOSH guYS THERRE TRYING TO COME CLODER I M DEAD
HOSH I LVOE YOU GWUYS AND AT MY FUNERAL WEAR RAINBOW SO EVERYONE KNOWS I'M GAY AS FUCK FOR LEE SEOKMIN AND THAN BURY ME IN HOT CHEETOS THTAV IS ALL I ASK FOR
woozi USE SELF DEFENSE GOD DAMNIT SOONYOUNG
tallbeagle we are on our way!!!! just wait a bit!!!!!
dkcountryreturns SOONYOUNG BBY DON'T SAY THAT YOU'LL BE FINE WE'RE JUST AROUND THE CORNER
dino-saur this is scary!!!! soonyoung hyung pls be ok!
angelface MY BABY HE WILL BE FINE DON'T WORRY
jisooschrist my uncle's a priest he can probably lead ur funeral
angelface JISOO I LOVE U BUT STFU WE DON'T NEED A FUNERAL
HOSH my dudes,,,, it's all good,,,
dkcountryreturns oh god they drugged him didn't they
HOSH no guys
HOSH it literally is just an emo teenage fan
HOSH she's like 15 and awkward but she's adorable
memegyu r u serious
woozi r u saying we packed all these people in the car for u to be stopped by an emo fan
woozi there are 5 of us in the trunk
dino-saur hehe i think it's fun being in the trunk
woozi chan pls shut up i'm trying to be annoyed
whatwoo u don't have to try that hard
woozi suddenly being annoyed is easier thx wonwoo for ur input
minghoe soonyoung what's happening??
HOSH we are j-chilling and i'm giving her my autograph
HOSH y'all,,, my first autograph!!!
angelface so annoyed,,, yet still so proud,,,,
jisooschrist guess i should stop writing my email to my uncle,,
goodgemini /YES U SHOULD/
verdone this was wild
verdone also i can't feel my legs bc seungkwan's ass bones are dabbing into them
chachawoo oh ?
hitthekwan hansollie the j and the d are not even near each other on the keyboard u fake ass hoe
hitthekwan ur lucky u have a nice dick
mother WE HAVE CHILDREN PRESENT
woozi GDI VERKWAN KEEP IT IN THE BEDROOM
dad We're here Soonyoung. Get in the car.
puppycat doesn't seungcheol sound more aggressive than he actually is with his perfect grammar? like he sounds so annoyed but he really isn't?!!?
angelface u get used to it
angelface he's just old and boring tbh
dad As you can see, I have the nicest best friend.
angelface ily2 cheollie <3
goodgemini holy shit
memegyu guys we are witnessing history being born
therock what's happenign what
woozi seungcheol has never typed an emoji before this minute
woozi honestly so proud
woozi probs will give u some real good head for this one cheol
hitthekwan GDI JICHEOL KEEP IT IN THE BEDROOM
woozi seungkwan if i wasn't stuck in the trunk with these 4 other losers i'd whoop ur sorry ass
dino-saur jihoon hyung :((((
minghoe excuse me binch
angelface how dare u call my boyfriend a loser
jisooschrist hannie chill nothing jihoon says to me even registers bc i don't comprehend irrelevant things
woozi ur lucky u are who u are hong jisoo
HOSH anyone want some hot cheetos
HOSH HOLY SHIT
HOSH I KNOW JISOO HAS ACTUALLY BEEN DOING WHEN HE LEAVES THE HOUSE SO EARLY IN THE MORNINGS
HOSH IM LAHGIN SO HRAD
angelface lol what?
mother SPILL THE TEA BITCH
tallbeagle mommy please calm down
whatwoo how do u even know in the first place
HOSH HE LEFT HIS LAPTOP OPEN AND UNLOCKED WHEN HE FELL ASLEEP
chachawoo what does he do?!
HOSH SO U KNOW EVER SINCE WE DEBUTED WE'VE BEEN RELEASING VLOGS AND SHIT AND WE'VE BEEN GOING ON VARIETY SHOWS????
memegyu um ya we've been there
puppycat i'm so awkward on variety shows kms
hitthekwan DID SOMEBODY SAY VARIETY BC THAT IS MY SHIT
father seungkwan u actually are the king of variety ur freaking hilarious
HOSH GUYS JISOO IS A TRANSLATER YOUTUBER
HOSH HE TRANSLATES ALL OUR CONTENT INTO ENGLISH FOR INT. FANS
HOSH HE'S HELLA FAMOUS TOO?!?!?! OVER 50,000 FOLLOWERS
woozi lol who even
dad That seems very tiring...
angelface that's so cute!
HOSH IT GETS BETTER
HOSH HIS USERNAME IS 'jihan is canon <333 :333 uwu'
HOSH HE MAKES EDITS OF HIS OWN RELATIONSHIP
HOSH AND OUR RELATIONSHIPS TOO!?!?!?
HOSH HE MAKES UCKING CRACK VIDEOS AS WELL IM SHITIGN
verdone THERE ARE TEARS INMY EYES FROM LAUHGIN
dkcountryreturns SOONYOUNG U SLY DOG U
angelface SEND THE LINK I'M WATCHING ECERY VIDEO
angelface IM NOT EVEN ASHAMED
angelface YALL THIS IS THE MAN I'M GONNA MARRY AND I'M NOT EVEN SORRY
angelface HES SUCH A CHEESEBALL I LOVE HIM
minghoe ,,,, a cheeseball
woozi jeonghan amazes me,, if seungcheol pulled shit like this i'd be so embarassed /for him/ that i wouldn't be able to look at him lol
dad Good to know,,,
mother SEnD tHE lINK THIS IS SO SPICY
father mj u need to chill bb
chachawoo does jisoo even know u exposed him lol
HOSH nope lololol he'll wake up later and be horrified
tallbeagle poor jisoo :(
angelface yoon sanha ur so precious, jisoo will be fine bc i'll make it fine ;)
dad OKAY WELL ON THAT NOTE
jisooschrist i just woke up,, hwhat did i miss
HOSH HAHASHAHA JIHAN IS CANON
jisooschrist u know what,,,
jisooschrist not even ashamed :)
therock wait jisoo can u teach me how to do that
therock i thnk the world deserves more socky content
father no it doesn't
therock piss off old man
Chapter 8: I fOrGOt to NaME tHsi
idek a lot happens in this chapter just wait and see
LISTEN UP PD101 FINALS WERE FRIDAY AND KIM SAMUEL DID NOT GET IN FUCKING TOP 11 I AM SO HEARTBROKEN AND PISSED ALSO NU'EST IS GETTING SPLIT UP :((((
idk if you have seen the video of muel trying to not to cry on live tv as he found out he didn't make it, but that video is everywhere and it makes me cry bc i'm a loser and this kid has worked so hard :((( so in the beginning there are some controversial topics about mnet and the whole pd101 situation- most of these i took from twitter as people reactions so pls don't yell at me for what is said!!
also on a better note! i got a request for more chinaline and binwoo (there will be much more of both in the future as well!), and you ask, you receive!! if u readers ever want to see something in this shit excuse for a fanfiction, hmu bc i will do it!
also thank u for all commenting and giving kudos! i'm so touched whenever i see someone has enjoyed this chatfic hell!! also i also get v flustered bc there are so many authors that i adore and i adore their work that have either commented or given kudos so special thanks to u guys bc ily ah
p.s. i've been slowly writing this over the weekend,, sorry this update is so slow, finals are kicking my ass lol
dad i am so upset that i cant even bother with grammar rn
woozi cheol r u good
mother um this can't be good
dad kim samuel, this 15 year old boy who was with us when we first even made out youtube channel,,, who left us for bigger and better things because he is such a talented boy,,,
dad was on produce 101 and FOR SOME IMPOSSIBLE REASON GOT 18TH!?!?!?! DIDN'T DEBUT?!?!?! EVERY SINGLE FUCKING PERSON THOUGHT HE'D DEBUT
dad I WENT TO THE FINAL!!!! I HAD TO WATCH THIS BOY TRY NOT TO CRY AS HIS LOSS WAS FILMED ON LIVE TELEVISION,, EVERYONE WAS HYPED UP FOR HIM TO DEBUT,,,
dad LIKE JEONGHAN AND JISOO ARE LIKE HALF THE PEOPLE IN THIS CHAT'S "PARENTS" BUT SAMUEL I COULD CONSIDER AS MY CHILD AND MY HEART IS BREAKING FOR HIM
tallbeagle he didn't debut?!?!?!
father dude it's because mnet is a racist piece of shit,, i bet the only reason he didn't debut is because he's half-mexican
dino-saur sammy didn't get in top 11?!? ;~;
verdone i'm actually crying
goodgemini the video of him almost crying is spreading across social media like a wildfire
memegyu muel deserves so much better ://
angelface i can't believe mnet and knetizen's slept on him like this,,, cheollie i know how close you were with muellie... please cheer him up
minghoe did u see mnet accidently posted the original final lineup and samuel was on it? idek but they apologized and shit but people are saying that muel was supposed to debut!?!!?
dad i NEED AN ANGRY BATH
woozi can i join
jisooschrist um guys
jisooschrist i lost junhui and minghao
mother how can u lose ur own children
tallbeagle myungjun hyung you /really/ shouldn't be talking lol! :D
mother ,,, my child,,, please
goodgemini u should've been actually watching us instead of sitting in the manga section of newbury comics u nerd
minghoe y don't you find us jisoo ;)
jisooschrist are u literally asking me to play hide and seek with u two in the mall
jisooschrist ok im coming
goodgemini this is why jisoo is my favorite
goodgemini u aren't even on my top 5 hansol
minghoe what about me :(
goodgemini you're too good to even be on the list
goodgemini you're like,, better than one,,, you're my 0
minghoe awh i think <3
mother honestly by the way junhui thinks, you'd think he'd be a natural blond
whatwoo you just insulted all the blonds ever born comparing them to jun
goodgemini wonwoo who hurt you
whatwoo YOU DID WHEN YOU USED THE LAST OF THE ORANGE JUICE AND PUT THE CONTAINER BACK
whatwoo I KNOW IT WAS YOU DON'T EVEN LIE
whatwoo I BET YOU EVEN BRUSHED UR TEETH RIGHT BEFORE
whatwoo BC UR JUST EVIL LIKE THAT
minghoe he totally brushed his teeth before
minghoe idk the only explanation is that he's a gemini ://
goodgemini /GOOD/ GEMINI
chachawoo junhui you brush your teeth before you drink orange juice, there is no possible way for you to be 'good'
goodgemini CHA EUNWOO PLS
HOSH ikr that's kind of deisgusting
goodgemini it doesn't taste bad!!!!
minghoe ur lucky i love you
goodgemini i love you too
puppycat minhyuk brushes his teeth before drinking orange juice too
therock BIN WHY DO YOU TRY TO RUIN MY LIFE
puppycat ha ha Suffer
jisooschrist can you give me a hint i've been searching for twenty minutes
angelface jisoo i bet our future marriage that you haven't even left newbury comics yet
jisooschrist welp the marriage is still on ppl
minghoe we are,,, on the left half of the mall!
dad You do realize the mall is one of the biggest in Korea, right? It could take Josh like 2 hours to search every store only on the left...
goodgemini you're pretty slow aren't you seungcheol hyung
dad Do you want to lose your mirror privileges?
goodgemini I'M SORRY DAD FORGIVE ME
chachawoo mirror privileges?
dino-saur since junhui hyung loves his reflection so much the worst punishment to him and not being able to see himself in a mirror,, when we gets in trouble we take down all the mirrors in the house and everyone has a personal mirror except him lol
father we need this for myungjun
mother I NEED THE DIVORCE PAPERS
therock GDI YOU GUYS AREN'T EVEN MARRIED
jisooschrist guys i've checked half of the stores so far,,, i'm stopping for boba tea bc i'm kinda out of breath
tallbeagle jisoo hyung fighting!!!
jisoochrist thanks sanha <3
angelface u sure u don't wanna adopt him,,
mother jeonghan stop trying to adopt my child
goodgemini minghao why did u leave me
minghoe i wanna buy you something
goodgemini now i have to buy u something
goodgemini ur lucky i love you and brought my wallet
dkcountryreturns soonyoung can u buy me something? <3
HOSH i would babe <3 but i'm currently penniless
puppycat you guys actually have jobs as idols now, you should have money?!?
HOSH ahehehhe,,, i
HOSH i spent all of my past 2 paychecks,,,
memegyu ON WHAT!?!?
HOSH SHINee merch
HOSH SHINee tickets
HOSH lee taemin's sock
HOSH kim kibum's glasses?
HOSH idk lots of stuff
hitthekwan can i touch the sock
HOSH if u wear gloves,,,
woozi i wonder about soonyoung's sanity sometimes
father can i come to SHINee with you
HOSH why not
father my dude,,, thank
goodgemini lonely by sistar came on in H&M and now i'm hiding in clothing racks to hide that i'm crying
hitthekwan we've all been there...
memegyu UM NO WE HAVEN'T SEUNGKWAN R U OK
hitthekwan excuse me you didn't leave your room for 3 days after 2ne1 broke up
whatwoo hah mingyu what a loser
hitthekwan don't even get me started wonwoo let me list some names: 4minute, wonder girls, c-clown, kara, lc9, even ioi lol u can't talk
whatwoo i have a meeting bye
jisooschrist JUNHAO STOP SHOPPING I CAN'T FIND U
minghoe we're done!! we've met up already
goodgemini i am offended
goodgemini i thought hao was going to be a good boyfriend and buy me something sentimental so i bought him this super expensive watch and some classy hair product, and u know what he got me,,, A HAT WITH DEVIL EARS THAT SAYS GEMINI ON THE FRONT
minghoe thanks for the presents babe!!!!
jisooschrist i hear junhui whining
jisooschrist founD U BITCHES
angelface don't call your children bitches jisoo
jisooschrist FOUND YOU WHIPPERSNAPPERS
angelface oh god just use bitches
goodgemini i wouldn't be whining if minghao was a /good boyfriend/
minghoe don't worry junhui i'll give you your real present tonight ;)
memegyu i just vommed a bit
jisooschrist JESUS CHRIST STOP MAKING OUT I WANNA GO HOME AND READ
puppycat don't u mean,,, Jisoos Christ
verdone our lord and savior
woozi don't you mean Amen?
dkcountryreturns did i just witness moon bin kiss cha eunwoo straight on the lips on live television
minghoe oh shit
HOSH IT'S REAL
HOSH I JUST WITNESSED IT
HOSH THE WHOLE SHOW IS FREAKING OUT
HOSH BINWOO JUST CAME OUT ON LIVE TELEVISION IN SOUTH KOREA
angelface this /really/ is not going to turn out well,,,,
chachawoo guys i think i fucked up
mother YOU THINK
puppycat dongmin :(
woozi u got real guts lee dongmin
father sorry we haven't updated you guys
father our manager has us on lockdown in our house for a while as shit calms down
father we're cut off the social media and basically the world
father but u guys should still be able to contact us i think
dad How is everybody holding up?
father myungjun and i are fine, we know that it was only a matter of time before we'd have a scandal
father tbh didn't think it'd be this huge, but we'll get over it..
father sanha and minhyuk aren't use the being this cut off from the world, i think they're scared about what's gonna happen
father bin is functioning normally? idk what's up with him actually
father and we haven't seen dongmin since we got home from the variety show, he hasn't left his room... bin and mj have brought him his meals, but he hasn't spokena word to us. i think he is taking the full responsibility for this and thinks we are gonna have to disband our group even though we just debuted like 2 months ago,,
dino-saur it isn't all dongmin hyung's fault :(
verdone i think that was very brave of him, i wish i could let the world about my relationship as well,,,,
jisooschrist if you can, let dongmin know that all of seventeen has his respect and will support him and ASTRO no matter what happens.
father i will try, thanks guys
memegyu um holy shit
memegyu astro,,, u won't believe this
memegyu the media was angry, but now all kinds of idol are coming out about their relationships!?!?!?!
memegyu it's like a fucking queer revolution
verdone dude this is the craziest shit i've ever witnessed
dino-saur jungkook and jimin were the first to follow u and bin
HOSH after that we have: key and jonghyun, wonho and hyungwon, g-dragon and top, kyulkyung and nayeon, amber and krystal, baekhyun and chanyeol, momo and mina, mark and jackson, dude even jaebum jinyoung and youngjae are together
angelface also in nct there was taeyong and winwin, mark and haechan, ten and johnny
whatwoo dongmin you and bin actually started a gay revolution
puppycat dongmin just fainted
jisooschrist whoops just told the world about jeonghannie and i
dino-saur nahahah r u srs?
minghoe he actually just posted a pic of him and jeonghan kissing with a rainbow in the background
angelface awh <3 we're part of the gay asian revolution
tallbeagle omg!!! this is crazy!!!
mother our ratings just went up tenfold
mother dongmin u just made us rich
therock people are so confused
therock the gays are screaming
therock like check twitter
whatwoo #kpopisgay is number trending worldwide and has been for the past day
puppycat i told u guys we shouldn't worry!!
mother ok just because u r optimistic like all of time does not mean we are,, i thought we were gonna have to quite idol life and become strippers so we can get money
mother i was practicing on jinwoo and i think i'd be pretty good if it got that bad
tallbeagle lol our manager just brought dongmin and bin flowers saying " i'm sorry i yelled at you for kissing so now i'm saying thank you for kissing bc i now can actually pay for groceries i love you guys "
dkcountryreturns guys can seventeen just come out about all our relationships
whatwoo we wouldn't be shipped with other ppl as much
jisooschrist come join the Revolution losers
woozi o god yes pls if i'm shipped with soonyoung anymore i may cry
woozi the pitiful looks seokmin has given me when i have to fanservice has gotten too much
dad Let's do it one relationship at a time so it's less overwhelming ok?
chachawoo well i guess my stupidity worked out in the end!
puppycat ;) i told you it'd be fine you big loser
tallbeagle vive les betes!!
angelface sanha dear u know that translates to 'long live the beasts'?
tallbeagle awh i tried to google translate long live the queers... D:
memegyu so basically the queers are beasts
whatwoo i can almost taste the confederate flag
father ahaha yikes let's not get into that
dino-saur how about vive les gens etranges?
angelface nope, that's long live strange people lol
jisooschrist how about just vive les gays because we're all gay
angelface Talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show stopping, spectacular, never the same, totally unique, completely not ever been done before, unafraid to reference or not reference, put it in a blender, shit on it, vomit on it, eat it, give birth to it
mother tbh you know they're gay when they can easily quote anything lady gaga has said
angelface i was born this way ;)
jisooschrist ok u little monster time to stop <3
therock OKAY I NEED THIS QUESTION ANSWERED
therock JOSHUA HONG
therock HONG JISOO
therock I SUMMON YOU
jisooschrist yes, young one, what do you inquire?
therock u watch anime right?
woozi /oh god/ does he?
woozi all fall i did not stop hearing him obsess over yuri on ice from about october to january
woozi and then is haikyuu,,,,, who even plays volleyball anymore
jisooschrist DONT YOU DARE INSULT HAIKYUU
jisooschrist YOI IS FINE TO INSULT BC HALF THE SHOW WAS FANSERVICE BUT
jisooschrist HAIKYUU IS A CINEMATIC MASTERPIECE AND IT WILL NEVER DIE
jisooschrist KARASUNOOOO :,))
whatwoo so the answer is yes, he does watch anime
therock OKAY SO YOU WERE BORN IN AMERICA RIGHT? SO YOU SPOKE ENGLISH PRIMARILY AS YOU GREW UP???
jisooschrist that is correct
therock BUT NOW YOU LIVE IN KOREA AND SPEAK IN KOREAN AND SING IN KOREAN AND DO KOREAN THINGS RIGHT????
jisooschrist um yes?!?!
therock SO WHEN YOU WATCH ANIME, DO YOU WATCH IT WITH ENGLISH SUBTITLES OR KOREAN SUBTITLES?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!
jisooschrist oh i can only speak korean well lol, reading and writing is hard because in america i only spoke korean at home
jisooschrist so i usually use english subtitles
puppycat oh god
dkcountryreturns don't say it
jisooschrist the english dub
goodgemini ahhhh no pls
dino-saur i'm dub shaming
angelface some subs aren't bad!!!! i like the way ouran highschool host club and tokyo ghoul sound!
jisooschrist this is why i'm marrying him
angelface <3 :D
mother @ seventeen i just was reading ur profiles on pledis and joshua it said that u are on team jacob so i don't think we can be friends anymore
father lol team jacob for life
jisooschrist haha yes jinwoo
mother OK THAT'S IT I'M FILING A DIVORCE I CAN'T BE ASSOCIATED WITH SOMEONE WHO IS NOT TEAM EDWARD
therock /YOU AREN'T EVEN MARRIED/
Chapter 9: more gay stuff
so much happens but ft. chan being the Best, crazy lesbians, and some random jihan stuffs
hello!! i am back after some mild writer's block with another random ass chapter!!
school finally ended yesterday and so i'm finally Free and a sophomore!! i have job interview tomorrow as well! tbh idek what to say so enjoy this chapter!
also i need more ideas so if you want something in this chatfic request away and i will give u whatever u want lol! <3
angelface MY CHILDREN
angelface WERE YOU GUYS AT HOME TODAY!?!?!?!
dkcountryreturns no lol i was with astro playing mini golf
HOSH me too
tallbeagle it was fun!!!
father we should see if our managers can hook up something so our fan's can watch our interactions
father we had a whole fanbase that fuels off of astro x seventeen content lol
hitthekwan hansol and i went to go see his family
hitthekwan i'm pretty sure sofia hates me btw
verdone no she doesn't lololol
verdone i think she feel threatened by you bc i love u so much and she's never experienced me liking someone so much before <3
hitthekwan you've never loved someone like you loved me?
verdone kwannie i've never loved someone like this before you
hitthekwan I LOVE YOU SO MUCH WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE YOU
hitthekwan HOW CAN SOMEONE AS PERFECT AS YOU LOVE SOMEONE LIKE ME
verdone UR THE PERFECT ONE
hitthekwan NO YOU ARE
verdone YOU!!! ARE!!!! PERFECT!!!!!
hitthekwan YOU'RE PERFECTER
verdone YOU'RE PERFECTEST
woozi verkwan can u take that lovey dovey shit somewhere else
dad Hey Jihoon.
woozi hi cheol how are you have you eaten can u kiss me u haven't yet today
angelface GUY WE'RE GETTING OFF TOPIC WHO WAS HOME TODAY
goodgemini i'm at a photoshoot rn
memegyu whatever visual -.-
whatwoo mingyu and i have been at the book cafe all morning
memegyu save me
dad Jihoon and I got ice cream before we headed to the movies. We are watching the previews for the movie now.
mother what are you watching?
woozi well we were /going/ to watch Wonder Woman, but cheol decided to eat slow as fuck so we missed the start of the movie, so now we are watching the Captain Underpants movie so we don't have to wait 2 hours for the next showing of WW
dad I read the books when I was younger, I think the movie will be cute!
woozi cheol we are the only adults here who are not with their young children, and the movie is fueled off of bathroom jokes and about a half naked crazy man who thinks he's a superhero bc he was hypnotized to not separate the most likely gay elementary school protagonists this /not/ going to be cute
minghoe i'm third wheeling on a date with lay and suho
minghoe and their making me pay, saying i owe them for getting me together with junhui
minghoe i hate my friends
angelface so that leaves CHAN
dino-saur ya mom i was home all morning!!
angelface CHAN HOW IS THE WHOLE APARTMENT SO CLEAN IT'S SHINING
angelface WHEN JISOO AND I LEFT THE HOUSE THIS MORNING WE COULDN'T EVEN SEE THE FLOOR THROUGH EVERYONE'S SHIT
angelface tURNS OUR WE ACTUALLY HAVE A TOASTER?!?
angelface I THOUGHT I LOST THAT BACK IN 2015
dino-saur everyone left the house and was busy and i was rly bored so i decided to clean the house?!?
dino-saur like i just connected my phone to bluetooth, blasted music, and actually cleaned the entire house!!
dino-saur michael jackson and g-dragon really help me work hard lol
angelface JISOO STARTED CRYING
mother wow! i wish some of my boys would do that! (COUGH COUGH)
jisooschrist myungjun you don't even understand,, ever since i moved to korea from america and moved in with these losers, we've never had a clean house
jisooschrist i haven't seen the floor of the living room for so long, i didn't even know we had carpet
angelface chan i'm gonna pay u i'm so proud
puppycat wow chan i'm impressed
therock can u clean our house
dino-saur sure lol
mother hahahha No! chan don't do it these children need to learn how to clean themselves
therock mom pls
mother hmm, maybe they should start learning now!
therock mj pls
mother better gets those rubber gloves out of the cabinet!
therock MYUNGJUN HYUNG PLEASE DON'T MAKE ME
dkcountryreturns welp guess i should leave ur apartment
minghoe rip park minhyuk u will be missed
puppycat no he won't
dad Well, I do not suggest Captain Underpants if you want to see a movie in theaters.
woozi they save the day with a uranus joke,,, A URANUS JOKE
woozi THIS MOVIE IS FOR CHILDREN
puppycat guys i love lesbians
puppycat they are the Best type of human
jisooschrist tbh same
chachawoo bin what brought this
puppycat u know how we ignited the gaypop revolution?
HOSH my dude of course
HOSH our bands are now known as the gayest kpop groups in history lol
therock ik ur band is rly gay
jisooschrist we are Gay
puppycat well all these couple are really thankful for us allowing them to be open about their relationships, right? so they are sending dongmin and i gifts lol
puppycat ya our closet is getting rly full
hitthekwan dude i wish i got presents for being rly gay
puppycat so we're getting some pretty awesome stuf,,, but the lesbian couple are so Extra with this
puppycat these presents are Insane
dad Who is giving you things?
woozi more like what are they giving u
woozi if u having gotten at least 1 dildo i know ur lying
puppycat JIHOON SHHSHHH
goodgemini ;) u and dongmin will be having a lot of fun won't u
puppycat junhui shut ur face
puppycat amber and krystal sent us the largest edible arrangements bouquet i have ever seen in my life
therock [image] y'all it's this except like 4 feet wide
therock u could feed like 200 ppl with this
mother we should have a fan meet and give some fruit to fans
mother bc we are /not/ eating all of that ourselves
angelface can we come??
tallbeagle PLS MOM IT CAN BE LIKE A HUGE SVT X ASTRO MEET UP
mother y not
puppycat LET ME CONTINUE ABOUT MY BEAUTIFUL LESBIAN PRESENTS
puppycat nayoung and jieqiong sent us a cat
puppycat AN ACTUAL KITTEN
puppycat I NAMED THEM ELI
dkcountryreturns awh u have a gender neutral cat
chachawoo WE HAVE A CAT!??!?!
chachawoo I'M LEAVING THE STUDIO NOW I MUST SEE OUR CHILD
puppycat WE'RE NOW PARENTS
puppycat CL isn't even with anybody she was just so proud of us that she gave us tickets for a vacation to NYC
puppycat but like,,, /all/ of us
puppycat somehow she knows how close we all are!?!?!?!
woozi wait wtf
verdone r u saying cl actually is funding us a trip to nyc
verdone y'all i was born there
father HWAT HTHE FUCK
dino-saur you guys are iconic!!!
puppycat !!!!! it's for next month and we will be there for a week!!!! in her letter she said she already checked in with our companies and they agreed as long as we have a little concert and film what we do!!!!!!!
HOSH IF I KNEW THIS WOULD HAPPEN IF THE WORLD FOUND OUT ABOUT US BEING GAY I WOULD'VE FUCKING MADE OUT WITH SEOKMIN ON OUR DEBUT STAGE
whatwoo oh my osh
memegyu GUYS I NEED TO LEARN ENGLISH
minghoe i've been studying english!!! jisoo ur gonna have to help me!!!
jisooschrist ofc minghao
angelface jisoo dear you're going to have to teach all of his
father lol us too
chachawoo jinwoo and i can kind of speak english but in general astro sucks at english so we need help too!!
jisooschrist ofc i can hold english time every thursday until we leave so y'all can get down the basics!?
angelface shua bby ur the best i love u
dad Thanks, Shua.
verdone I CAN SPEAK ENGLISH TOO
verdone I WAS BORN IN NYC FFS
jisooschrist u can join me hansol
hitthekwan yay hansol
verdone good :))
puppycat so momo and mina sent us socks
puppycat 3 huge boxes of socks
puppycat not just socks
puppycat the socks are the equivalent to packing peanuts?
puppycat they actually sent us,,, kitchenware?
dino-saur lol what?
puppycat well in one package, we have some plates, silverware, bowls, cups, the whole shebang
puppycat in the next box,,, a french press?
mother mmhm mornings are going to be so nice
puppycat and in the third box
dad Just cereal?
puppycat there are like 10 boxes of random cereal in here
whatwoo lesbians can be so weird
memegyu shh wonwoo the author is expressing her love for lesbian, bc she is in fact a lesbian, therefore she wants to make them sound interesting plus she likes kitchenware and cereal so that's why momo and mina have decided to be weird af and send binwoo kitchenware and cereal
tallbeagle lol what
puppycat yoojung and doyeon sent us like half a candy store
puppycat what is even happening with my life anymore
puppycat next thing we know,, dongmin and i will be on We Got Married
puppycat what the fuck
puppycat the producer of We Got Married but sent me a passive aggressive email saying that dongmin and i should've came out sooner so we could have been on the show before it ended
chachawoo my life is so strange idek anymore
goodgemini you guys are Iconic
jisooschrist tbh the straights are shaking
minghoe fear the gays
hitthekwan FEAR THE GAYS
jisooschrist speaking of married
jisooschrist jeonghan we need to start planning our wedding
angelface ur STILL SERIOUS ABOUT THIS!?!?!?!
angelface BBY OF COURSE LETS PLAN THIS
angelface doesn't one of us have to propose first??
jisooschrist we'll worry about that later
jisooschrist we obviously need to invite all of the participants of the gaypop revolution
goodgemini y'all with be the first gaypop revolutionaries to get married
father i thought the ppl who ignited the flame would be the one's to get married first
puppycat JINWOO I AM 19
puppycat I LIKE JUST GOT OUT OF HIGHSCHOOL I'M NOT GOING TO GET MARRIED
puppycat not saying i wouldn't love to spend the rest of my life with dongmin,,,
puppycat but wayyy too young dad
dad Jeonghan, I'm your best man right?????????????
woozi woah ok seungcheol try to be a bit more obvious huh
dad I thought that was obvious enough?
woozi sarcasm, cheol
angelface cheollie ofc ur my best man,,, ur my best friend
memegyu ooh awkward
whatwoo leave it alone mingyu u house wrecker
verdone jisoo who is ur best man gonna be??
jisooschrist honestly idk,,,
verdone (cough cough)
verdone (wink wonk)
verdone oh hey i didn't see u there
jisooschrist hansol do u want to be my best man
verdone oh i'd LOVE to!!! thanks for asking!!!
hitthekwan sol i love u to bits but that was the most pathetic thing i've ever witnessed
mother mhm hansol back at it again,,, getting 'yikes'-ed by sanha
verdone :,) sanha y u gotta do me dirty like this
tallbeagle :D <3
verdone ok ur forgiven
mother jinwoo can u give me a foot massage
father ew no u know i hate feet
therock I SWEAR TO GOS
therock UR NOT MARRIED
therock AT LEAST GET MARRIED AND THEN START JOKING ABOUT DIVORCE
dino-saur i never know y minhyuk gets to offended over this but it's honestly so funny thank u for the laughs buddy
woozi tbh i miss jeonghan's long hair
tallbeagle me too!! he looked so pretty!!
mother tbh jeonghan is generally just a pretty person
angelface *blusheu* awh stop it
jisooschrist u looked like a princess!!
jisooschrist and i was ur knight in shining armour awhh
angelface oh heck no
angelface sweety u are the princess
angelface i am and always will be /YOUR/ knight in shining armour
angelface sorry princess i don't make the rules <3
hitthekwan breaking standards right there,, ladies and gentleman now u see it,,, jihan is Superior don't even try to fight me u can't deny
Chapter 10: what a mess tbh
guys sorry this is so short!!!! i've been really busy!! i'll also be gone for the weekend so next update may take a while but it'll be longer!!!!
lol enjoy this crazy ass chapter!!!!!
btw blackpink's comeback snatched my wig so hard,,, holy shit
puppycat what if we were all actuallyin a video game
puppycat and there's a little teenager who's controlling everything we do
chachawoo bin it's three am
memegyu whoever's controlling us must be rly gay
mother ur right
mother no straight person would make literally every single one of us queer
jisooschrist so is it like,,, a lesbian? or like a gay boi?,,,
memegyu it's totally a lesbian did you even hear about the gifts the lesbians gave binwoo
father but it could be a gay boi bc we're all gay bois and the gifts was just trying to appreciate his homosexual sisters
chachawoo y r u all up so early we have a meetup tomorrow
minghoe it's totally a reverse dating sim
minghoe instead of the characters dating the player, the player is the characters and has them date eachother
therock this could start so many fandom wars
tallbeagle they made me so fashionable!!!
dino-saur omg sanha
dino-saur they made us bffls
tallbeagle awhhh you're right!??!?!?! <333
therock !!!!!!!!! >:00000 <333333
tallbeagle don't worry minhyuk, we were obvi brought together by fate
whatwoo or apparently a teenage lesbian
angelface awh modern romance <3
goodgemini mhm she must be having the time of her life
goodgemini i am so financially stable
whatwoo like we actually have groceries that last an entire week is this heaven
mother kudos to our player ur the main man
mother ur the main (wo)man
dad Guys my brain hurts from thinking about this too much.
hitthekwan hansol has fell into the deepest existential crisis i have yet to encounter
hitthekwan he hasn't blinked since bin suggested this
puppycat lol sorry
chachawoo DID EVERYONE DECIDE TO PULL AN ALL NIGHTER OR SOMETHING
minghoe dongmin it's like 11 pm
chachawoo MY CLOCK SAYS IT'S 4:39 AM
angelface lol it's 10:39 pm dongmin
puppycat bby i think your clock is wrong
chachawoo so do u mean i slept all day
minghoe lmao cha eunwoo at his finest
chachawoo ahh frick now my sleep schedule is fricked up
HOSH YOU FRIKCING FRICKS
HOSH WHEN WILL YOU LEARN,,, WHEN WILL YOU LEARN,,,
HOSH THAT UR ACTIONS,,, HAVE CONSEQUENCES!?!/!!?!!?/1?!
memegyu ahh,, the iconic sammyclassicsonicfan
jisooschrist jeonghan stfu
woozi ah jisoo is jealous for a little angry nerd being more daddy than himself
dad Jihoon STFU.
tallbeagle hehe i love sammy
dino-saur i heard he got bullied a lot :((((
dkcountryreturns HIS YOUTUBE WAS DELETED
mother WHAT NO
goodgemini is this the end of the world
whatwoo oh wow hello depression
therock SAMMY SUNBAENIM COME BACK MY LOVE
therock it was just a josh,,,, i love you infinitely sanha
angelface ugh goals
angelface jisoo we better be cuter than them when we get married
jisooschrist created a new chatroom
jisooschrist named chatroom ' yo yo yo proposal nyc 2k17 '
jisooschrist added 17 users
jisooschrist y'all i've decided i'm going to propose to jeonghan when we are in nyc
jisooschrist i need y'all to help me
mother OF COURSE I'LL HELP
dad As you are to be the husband of my best friend, I see it fit that I assist you in asking for his hand in marriage.
woozi ,,,,,, yike
puppycat at least you've discussed it and know he's gonna say yes!
memegyu lol imagine if you proposed in like times square or something and sang to him and shit and then he said no
goodgemini lol and it would be recorded too,,, fans would lose their shit
dkcountryreturns u guys are awful ppl
minghoe wen junhui???? idk her
goodgemini bby it was a joke,, you know i support their marriage 100 percent
verdone lol ya he does,, before jeonghan and jisoo got together he basically had a shrine towards their relationship
hitthekwan no joke,, he used to send us relationship updates in a jihan chatroom
goodgemini SHUT UR FUCK JOSHUA AND JEONGHAN WERE NEVER SUPPOSED TO KNOW ABOUT THAT
jisooschrist ohohoh?? ;)
father ANYWAY jisoo i think singing would be a great thing to do bc both of our groups are pretty widely known kpop groups and there will def be fans to witness the proposal,, and it's very romantic
chachawoo we could totally have a huge 19 person duit something and have u solo and woo ur man
minghoe lol (eun)woo him
jisooschrist singing sounds good,,, should i bring my guitar???
woozi sorry to break it to you but you can't propose on one knee and present jeonghan with a ring while simultaneously playing guitar,,,
jisooschrist i can try!
dad You would fail, Jisoo.
jisooschrist :( but guitars are romantic
tallbeagle i can play guitar!!!
jisooschrist !!! :)
jisooschrist idk how we are going to make u be lowkey while carrying around a guitar but we'll make it work!!!
mother i think Times Square would be good as well
puppycat ya a lot of people will be watching
memegyu who bets jeonghan's gonna cry
goodgemini me too
verdone wtf jisoo is going to be the one to cry
verdone did u see him with your lie in april,,,, he cried for like 3 hours
verdone he even cried the first episode bc the music was so beautiful
jisooschrist IT WAS OK
jisooschrist THE ANIME RUINED MY LIFE
woozi ok crybaby less anime more marriage
' OT19 '
whatwoo idgaf what any of u says but veggietales is some Good Shit
chachawoo i have a stuffed toy of larry the cucumber
puppycat AND I HAVE A STUFFED BOB THE TOMATO
puppycat WE'RE SUCH COUPLE GOALS
dkcountryreturns tbh veggietales is what taught me to be a decent human being
woozi ew that shit is creepy asf
woozi y would u wanna watch talking vegetables teach u the bible
mother EXCUSE ME DON'T INSULT MY VEGETABLES
angelface REGARDLESS OF WHETHER IT'S RELIGIOUS OR NOT THE SONGS ARE BOPS AND IT TEACHES YOU LIFE MORAL WHICH HAVE HELPED ME GROW UP
verdone tbh i've had too many veggietales sing a longs
hitthekwan u know what i have cringey sing a longs to ???
hitthekwan PHINEAS AND FERB
HOSH GOOD SHIT RIGHT THERE
dad I love that show.
dkcountryreturns WhO DOEsnT
goodgemini i don't
minghoe we're done
minghoe HOW CAN U NOT LIKE PHINEAS AND FERB
therock ITS THE BEST SHOW EVER
father the songs are so catchy
dino-saur S I M P
verdone SQUIRRELS IN MY PANTS
jisooschrist where's perry
woozi it's not a party it's an intimate get together
puppycat CANDACE PARTY
angelface CANDACE PARTY
dad This should be concerning because are basically all adult grown men freaking out about a show for elementary school students... but it isn't?
therock my dude,,, p & f is for all ages shapes and sizes
tallbeagle don't be ashamed !!!
verdone PREPARE FOR TROUBLE
woozi oh god
hitthekwan AND MAKE IT DOUBLE
whatwoo someone stop them
chachawoo wait this seems entertaining
verdone TO PROTECT THE WORLD FROM DEVESTATION
hitthekwan TO UNITE ALL PEOPLES IN OUR NATION
verdone TO DENOUNCE THE EVILS OF TRUTH AND LOVE
hitthekwan TO EXTEND OUR REACH TO THE STARS ABOVE
verdone VERKWAN, BLAST OFF AT THE SPEED OF LIGHT
hitthekwan SURRENDER NOW OR PREPARE TO FIGHT
dino-saur THAT'S RIGHT
goodgemini no chan don't support these losers
memegyu lol what
whatwoo guys no
hitthekwan DON'T STRUGGLE YOU PEASANTS
verdone IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO GET THINGS STRAIGHT
verdone WELL,,, IN THIS CASE,,,
verdone IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO GET THINGS GAY
hitthekwan IT'S BEEN LIKE 4 YEARS SINCE WE MET
hitthekwan U TWO KEEP SKRT SKRTING AROUND EACH OTHER
minghoe it's true
minghoe even verkwan confessed
HOSH my dudes,, verkwan was almost as bad as u two
whatwoo y r u doing this now
memegyu astro,,, my friend,,, help a pal in need
tallbeagle mingyu hyung the only thing u need is wonwoo's dick
mother BAHBSHA NO CHORES FOR U BBY U DESERVE A NIGHT FREE FOR THAT
puppycat i wanna be mad for that but that was so good im
dkcountryreturns bHAHA mingyu get rekt
whatwoo but mingyu and i r just friends
jisooschrist but BULLSHIT
memegyu boi last time i checked friends don't sleep together (literally and sexually) and hold hands and stuff
memegyu if u would just ask we'd be bfs and not change a thing
father u guys aren't actually dating??
mother no sweety, wonwoo's just emotionally constipated and is making mingyu suffer through some weird attempted friends with benefits kinda shit
whatwoo myungjun ur words r so kind
verdone SO CITIZENS OF THIS CHATROOM
hitthekwan PLAN A WILL OFFICIALLY BE PUT INTO ACTION IN 3
memegyu wait what
17 users have left ' OT19 "
whatwoo yo i know how to solve this
whatwoo mingyu do u wanna be my boyfriend
memegyu of course <3
whatwoo ok <3
whatwoo added 17 users to ' OT19 '
whatwoo guys meet my boyfriend mingyu
verdone GOOD TEAMWORK Y'ALL
HOSH so what'd u guys talk about ;))))) anything spicy/??
memegyu o ya it was the kinkiest minute of my life
father congrats on gettig together
dad Even though they've basically been dating since they met....
mother ah~~ young love
tallbeagle myungjun hyung ur like 2 years older than them wtf
mother /YOUNG LOVE/
angelface created a new chatroom
angelface named chatroom ' bling bling wedding ring '
angelface added 17 users
angelface I'VE DECIDED THAT WHEN WE GO ON VACA TO NYC, I'M GOING TO ASK MY BEAUTIFUL BOYFRIEND TO BE MY BEAUTIFUL HUSBAND
hitthekwan oh shit
dad Of course, Jeonghan. That sounds like a great idea!
goodgemini a great, original, unique, unfamiliar, interesting idea!!!
mother i love romance lol
mother *sips wedding tea*
angelface you guys have to help me make this the best wedding proposal the gay world has ever seen!
therock u should sing
memegyu we should all sing
tallbeagle i'll play guitar!!
angelface good idea!! i wonder how we'll make an acoustic guitar look less suspicious,,,,
HOSH heh i guess we'll figure it out when the date comes sooner!!
angelface yes we will!!~~
mother created a new chatroom
mother named chatroom ' y does jihan do this to us '
mother added 16 users
mother i don't want to be pessimistic but y'all we're screwed
dino-saur let's pray to the gay gods or the lesbian controlling us or whoever that this goes well!!!!!!!!
Chapter 11: yes
what even is this tbh
pls for the first part,,, i personally am not hating on chansoo!! i actually ship them a lot- even though chanbaek is my ult! i was desperate for some controversy between my fave parent couple so therefore the chanbaek vs. chansoo fight was born! i respect all ships and the people who like those ships!! ps. pls don't hate on people or ships just because you don't like them!! it is mean and rude and people should just be kind to each other! pls and thank u
also i just got back from my lakehouse which doesn't have wifi and that's why i couldn't upload sooner! so here u go! more stress and gay faves!
AND HAPPY 500 DAYS WITH CARATS & SVT I LOVE MY BOIS AND I HOPE THEY CONTINUE TO GROW AND BE SUCCESSFUL!!
mother ok who do y'all recommend for divorce lawyers
woozi pretty sure cheol wanted to be a lawyer before we become idols
dad Why would you need a lawyer?
mother y else
mother i'm divorcing jinwoo
therock i am leaving this family i can't take this
minghoe minhyuk do u need help
chachawoo what did he do this time
father i didn't do anything!!!
mother u did everything
mother no don't talk to me
dino-saur lol what did jinjin hyung do this time?
mother oh god let me tell you
mother he left his laptop open when he went to shower yeah?
mother so i go over and look to see what he was doing,,,
mother he was writing fanfiction
verdone that's not that bad
memegyu tbh we all write it
mother exo fanfiction
puppycat no pls
dkcountryreturns i like exo fanfics?
tallbeagle oh,, we do too!! it's just,,,
mother ,,,,,, he was writing chansoo
mother IN MY GOOD CHRISTIAN HOUSEHOLD
father excuse me chansoo is beautiful
mother DIVORCE I TELL YOU
therock usually i'd be pissed about the divorce,, but
therock this situation is an exception,, i'll be mad next time jinwoo is annoying enough for his unhusband to want divorce,,
angelface have you even seen chanbaek!?!?!?!??!
mother IN THIS HOUSE WE ONLY SHIP CHANBAEK
father myungjun surely not everyone here ships chanbaek
mother IF YOU SHIP CHANBAEK SAY I
father i stand corrected
father this is awkward
father but guys,,, can't u respect that i ship chanyeol w someone else
tallbeagle :(( myungjun hyung
angelface mj pal,,,
HOSH how about polyamory!! chanbaeksoo!!
HOSH geez okay then
chachawoo my jihancheol feels just got stepped one
mother but,,, chanyeol luvs baekhyun
father chanyeol can also luv kyungsoo
puppycat chanbaek sent me signed merch after gaypop 2k17
father shh don't rub it in my face that they're actually together
father my fanfics are the only thing keeping my ship floating
mother then let it sink bitch
dino-saur hyung chill out
mother i'm sorry
mother u can ship whatever u want
mother i still love you
father i love you too
mother not as much as chanbaek tho
father on second thought
mother anyway the divorce is off for now... i need to be stronger... my mother told me marriage was hard
therock ur not married but whatever
therock i'm over it
jisooschrist listen up losers
jisooschrist what would your american names be
jisooschrist i need to know this
jisooschrist it's for science
hitthekwan gtfo u noob
hittekwan i think i'd be quin
hitthekwan bc quin kind of sounds like kwan
puppycat mmhm very nice
HOSH ,, aju nice
therock can eunwoo be eugine
chachawoo gdi i can't argue with jisoo
jisooschrist call me joshua for rn
jisooschrist we are all becomig american
jisooschrist changed their username to ' josh '
jisooschrist changed verdone's username to ' vernon '
jisooschrist changed hitthekwan's username to ' quin '
jisooschrist changed chachawoo's username to ' eugene '
eugene i don't support this
josh ok who else
josh cmon losers u choose or i do it for you
HOSH i'll be sal
quin ,,,, y tho it doesn't sound like hoshi or soonyoung
HOSH it starts with an s
josh sounds good enough for me
josh changed HOSH's username to ' sal '
sal i like it
memegyu i will be matthew
josh malcolm it is
josh changed memegyu's username to ' malcolm '
malcolm but matthew
eugene welcome to the life pal
eugene we sound like the typical white nerds who get stuffed into dumpsters after school
whatwoo there are barely any american names that start with w i think i'm fine
josh changed whatwoo's username to ' william '
josh it's been like 10 minutes it's time to bring matters into our own hands
josh changed mother's username to ' matthew '
josh changed father's username to ' jonathan '
josh changed minghoe's username to ' melvin '
malcolm joshua wtf why does myungjun get to be matthew
josh u drank the rest of the milk and then put to empty carton back into the fridge
malcolm malcolm is really the best name josh thx for giving it to me i love it
eugene joshua what about me what did i do wrong
josh i just rly like the name eugene tbh
eugene shh vernon is just as bad
vernon but it's my real name
eugene i know
quin o shit roasted
vernon ur my boyf aren't u supposed to stand up for me
quin oops sorry babe
quin hey eugene that was a no no
josh changed tallbeagle's username to ' sammy '
josh changed goodgemini's username to ' jerry '
josh changed woozi's username to ' waldo '
josh changed dkcountryreturns's username to ' sherwood '
josh changed puppycat's username to ' bob '
sal hahhahaha bob
quin moon bob lolololol
josh changed dad's username to ' sigmund '
william ok these are just gettig weird
malcolm lololol sigmund
vernon waldo is gonna kick ur ass u know that
vernon are not even basing it on his birthname
quin hey,,,, where is waldo??
josh changed therock's username to ' dwayne '
josh i really couldn't help it with that one i'm sorry
eugene i can respect that
josh changed dino-saur's username to ' chad '
josh changed angelface's username to ' jamison '
josh lol done
josh now it's just like back home!!
quin hyung i don't think there were actually people named sigmund, waldo, or sherwood
josh it's the thought that counts
eugene is it tho??
bob hey guys what's up
bob y am i named bob
dwayne lololol bob
dwayne who tf is dwayne
sal like dwayne the rock johnson
dwayne who are u
sal i'm sal
sigmund What is happening?
sigmund ... Sigmund, really?
jamison lol good one baby
jamison wher e in hell did u get jamison
malcolm the author literally just looked up american names that start with the letter of our names bc she's unoriginal and can't think of anything this late at night
chad ah the 'm' and the random 4th wall breaking,,, u must be mingyu
malcolm hello maknae
chad lol my name is easy it's only one letter off
eugene lucky u
dwayne lol eugene
bob don't worry babe i don't think eugene is that bad
bob no it's pretty bad but i love u anyway
sherwood this is so sonfusing
sal it starts with an s
sal seokmin has s and so does sherwood
sherwood thanks babe thatreally helped
sammy hello!! i likke your names!
jamison i got motherly tingles that must be sanha
jamison hello dear
sammy hello! :D
melvin i'm so uncomfortable
jerry i kind of like it
melvin shut up jerry
matthew i just made lunch who's hungry
matthew is this some alternate universe where i live in america
jonathon no myungjun jisoo just changed all our names
quin wait y did we do this again?
josh idk i was homesick
josh so i changed ppls names so they're more american
vernon except me
vernon don't be rude to your best man
jerry shut up vernon
vernon how bout u shut up jerry
melvin ya shut up jerry
jerry i'm being attacked
waldo why the fuck is my name waldo
chad lol we found waldo!
sammy i want to change names now!!
sammy returned 19 username's to last saved name change
woozi thank god
woozi seungcheol actually forced me into waldo cosplay
dad You were adorable!
woozi u better watch it >:*
puppycat was that an angry kiss
tallbeagle awh >:*
' bling bling wedding ring '
angelface guys i bought a ring!!
dino-saur i wanna see it!!
angelface [image] here!! i was gonna do a band but i didn't want it to be mistaken with our band rings
therock how much was it?
mother minhyuk don't ask things like that!
mother ,,,, but i'm interested ,,,,
angelface don't worry lol
angelface when jisoo and i discussed i suggested the 500-2000 dollar range
angelface this is $1,076
hitthekwan awhhhh and it's so pretty
dad Good choice, I think Jisoo will love it!
angelface he better !!
angelface but we're leaving for nyc in a week and i'm almost all ready!!
memegyu i'm kinda nervous
angelface don't be! u have no reason to :000
memegyu yup lol no reason at all
' OT19 '
puppycat i want leo from vixx to step on me
puppycat seriously every time i hear his high note in beautiful liar i want him to personally lower me into my grave
goodgemini i want to kinkshame but honestly same
angelface he's the kindof person who you just to cuddle and protect
whatwoo he's super shy but super nice
therock you've met him haven't you
verdone how do you even have the time to meet all these idols
verdone great answer
whatwoo sorry idek i just meet them
whatwoo like i've been friends with heechul from suju since i was a lad
memegyu "since i was a lad"
memegyu ever since me mum left me, i've been scouring the pavement for barmy arseholes
whatwoo u know what mingyu
whatwoo ur lucky i love u
whatwoo also i apologize to all european readers on mingyu's behalf
father ohohoho what's this?
HOSH wonwoo breaking the 4th wall?
jisooschrist god enough of the 4th wall breaking
jisooschrist it brings me closer to an existential crisis every time
' yo yo yo proposal nyc 2k17 '
jisooschrist i bought a ring
dkcountryreturns i'm developing a cold sweat
jisooschrist um hopefully a good cold sweat !!!!!
dkcountryreturns hehe yup it's because i'm so excited to see u propose !!!!!!!
minghoe hyung let's see the ring
jisooschrist of course!! [image]
mother oh my god
jisooschrist pretty huh!?
' y does jihan do this to us '
mother GUYS WHY DO THE RINGS LOOK ALMOST IDENTICAL
HOSH I'M STARTING TO FREAK OUT
'yo yo yo proposal nyc 2k17 '
goodgemini ya dude it's gorgeous
woozi how much did you pay for it?
jisooschrist ah ah ahah ahah a
jisooschrist ,,,, $8,841.00
father myungjun just fainted
jisooschrist ya i know it's a lot of money but i rly love jeonghan so ?!?!?!??!
' y does jihan do this to us '
chachawoo um the ring jisoo bought is literally 7 thousand dollars more expensive than the ring jeonghan bought for him
tallbeagle THIS IS KIND OF STRESSFUL
dkcountryreturns IT'S A LOT STRESSFUL
father ok guys let's just calm down
' yo yo yo proposal nyc 2k17 '
jisooschrist i'm thinking of seeing if i can get our company to let us vlive the whole thing (preparations and all) so all the fans can feel like they're a part of it
' bling bling wedding ring '
angelface we should totally broadcast the proposal so the world can see it!?!??! maybe we can put it on the jumbo screens in the middle of the city where everyone can see as well?!?!?!
' y does jihan do this to us '
father OKAY ON SECOND THOUGHT LET'S FREAK OUT
whatwoo oh god what is happening this is a mess
dad I think my hair is rapidly greying...
chachawoo i need some air
hitthekwan THIS IS AN EMERGENCY
puppycat WE'RE LEAVING IN TWO DAYS GUYS WE CAN'T EVEN DO ANYTHING
goodgemini we aren't even at the wedding planning yet
verdone i'm gonna kermit
father myungjun came back to consciousness and then fainted again seeing that they both want to broadcast this mess of a proposal
memegyu give him some juice or something
father good idea
minghoe guys at least we're going on vacation!!
woozi if his whole situation doesn't kill us first
dino-saur rip svt-stro
Chapter 12: this is stress
woahohoho it's nyc time
i'm so sorry this took a while!! i'm in vacation mode rn and doing a bunch of random stuff!!
this chapter is a bit longer, so hopefully that makes up for it!! also i did something a little different later in the chapter that u may or may not like but i'm probably not doing it again bc it's kind of bad but it was needed for the plot!!
anyway jihan angst (?) comes to a close here, and more random gay shit!!
i hope u all enjoy! this chapter was hard to put together so hopefully u don't hate it bc that would make me sad :(
father i have watched every single episode of fantastic duo that has ever aired
father i think every duo i've shed a tear
dkcountryreturns I LOVE THAT SHOW
father WHO'S YOUR FAVORITE DUO
father TAEYANG AND HIS GIRL LITERALLY BLEW MY SOCKS OFF
dkcountryreturns KIM BUM SOO AND KIM DA MI
dkcountryreturns DA MI'S VOICE WITH SOO'S MADE ME CRY
jisooschrist *rolls up sleeves*
jisooschrist LEE MOON SAE AND KIM YOON HEE
jisooschrist THAT 15 YR OLD GIRLS VOICE WITH LEGEND MOONSAE ACTUALLY DECEASED ME AND THEN RECEASED ME
jisooschrist NO ONE CAN TELL ME THEY DIDN'T DESERVE TO WIN
angelface bby,, didn't u hear that wonwoo and i are attended that
whatwoo ya we were filming it like last week bc we're leaving for nyc today
puppycat YES NYC BUT MORE IMPORTANT
puppycat I'M GONNA CRY I LOVE FANTASTIC DUO I'M GOFN
angelface chen and jisoo and lisa are also participating
hitthekwan I'M CRYING IN THE CLUB
mother if i record myself on the app singing with y'all do u think they'll chose me
mother kyuhyun from super junior actually tried to get picked for lee sunhee
goodgemini BOI HER DUO WITH THE YEJIN GIRL WAS SO FUCKGN GOOD
jisooschrist can i try and sing with jisoo and lisa
jisooschrist jisoo and i should make a duo tbh
jisooschrist we can be jisoo2
woozi how about Stop
tallbeagle why would their duo name be called Stop?
verdone PRECIOUS HUMAN
dad Sanha, Jihoon was just being rude, ignore that.
woozi -.- watch it pal
dad I am watching.
dino-saur parent set number 1, pls don't fight
dino-saur its stresses me out
woozi THAN BE STRESSED
HOSH who pissed in ur cheerios this morning
woozi idk who ATE my cheerios this morning?????
woozi AND LEFT THE FUCKING BOX IN THE FUCKING CABINET
woozi WHAT KIND OF EVIL PERSON ARE YOU
woozi MY DAY IS RUINED
verdone those were yours?
woozi HANSOL VERNON CHWE
therock my dude i'm not there rn but i suggest u run
mother i can feel jihoon's anger through me cell phone
hitthekwan hansol just skrt skrted out of here so fast
memegyu HE JUST LEFT THE APARTMENT
dino-saur JIHOONIE HYUNG FOLLOWED HIM
HOSH ONE MINUTE LET ME GET THE CAMERA THIS WILL BE SO GOOD ON OUR VLIVE CHANNEL
HOSH WE BETTER RUN IF WE WANT TO CATCH THIS ON FILM
minghoe more like u better run if u wanna save hansol's sorry ass
verdone PLS HELP ME
verdone I'M HIDING BEHIND SOME HOT CHEETOS IN THE DRUG STORE
woozi THERE U ARE U GREMLIN
HOSH did i hear hot cheetos
HOSH hansol ur safety can wait
dkcountryreturns i love seeing where soonyoung's loyalties lie
HOSH u and hot cheetos are all i need in life babe
mother that was nice
mother soonseok interactions have been kind of Dry lately
dkcountryreturns we've been busy doing other things other than flirting over text ;)
mother oh hoh hoh ;)))
dad Meaning they've been playing Overwatch and crying over Drama OST's.
dkcountryreturns y u gotta do me like this seungcheol hyung
mother still sounds fun ;)))
puppycat mj's winky face's always creep me out
mother Do You Wanna Fight Me Moon Bin
puppycat no i do not kim myungjun
mother THEN KEEP UR OPINIONS TO URSELF
mother u can't see me but i'm glaring at u
goodgemini tbh whenever i try to type out myungjun, i accidently type myungjin
minghoe it's because he writes too much astro fanfiction
goodgemini XU MINGHAO I'M GONNA BEAT UR ASS
goodgemini AND NOT IN THE SEXY WAY
goodgemini (although everything i do is sexy)
tallbeagle can i read ur fanfics!?!?!? :D
minghoe dude i can send u the links
goodgemini No You Will Not
angelface wait what ships do u write
goodgemini ,,,, all the canon couples obviously who do u take me for
angelface tbh i've probably read them
angelface i've read every fic on the astro ao3 tag
goodgemini DONGMIN NO U HAVEN'T
chachawoo lol,,, every single one
chachawoo even if i'm shipped with sanha or binnie with minhyuk
chachawoo aroha's are really talented and i don't want to let that go to waste
goodgemini IM SWETTIGN
goodgemini I CANR'GSF
minghoe his username is sockymeinthejaw
chachawoo junhui all ur fics have like the most kudos
goodgemini DON'T SAY IT
goodgemini PLEASE SPARE MY PRIDE
mother GIRL TELL ME PLS
mother I NEED MORE BLACKMAIL MATERIAL ON U GUYS
minghoe o hoe he gon do it
dad Junhui, you better not be doing anything rude to them.
chachawoo jun writes the KINKIEST shit
chachawoo his writing flusters the fuck out of me
chachawoo like i thought bin was pretty kinky but hell no
goodgemini ITS NOT THAT KINKY
chachawoo "myungjun whined as jinwoo pulled away. the loss of contact was almost unbearable for the older man, who was panted and squirming like a dog in heat. jinwoo smirked as he saw myungjun's whole naked body flush a lovely shade of pink. The ropes that were intricately knotted around his lover turned and pulled at his limbs in all the right ways. 'what's the safe word babe' the younger man mumbled as he pulled a blindfold from the bedside table. It took a minute for myungjun to respond, as he was overwhelmed by the sheer amount of lust and need corrupting his body. Once he had comprehended what jinwoo had just asked him, he muttered quietly 'aroha'"
mother dude if only jinwoo was that kinky
mother he's kinda vanilla
father I AM NOT VANILLA
angelface i am slightly concerned that u wrote their safeword as the name they call their fans
puppycat i am slightly turned on slightly disturbed
goodgemini DONGMIN Y
chachawoo this isn't even the good stuff
chachawoo i held back bc chan and sanha are Children
tallbeagle thanks hyung!
dino-saur wait send me the link though i wanna read it
memegyu also the author felt uncomfortable writing what was up above,,, she wouldn't be able to actually write smut also she is underage and has the overwhelming fear that her friends and family are just gonna find this fic so she's not going to write smut
jisooschrist do u write svt fanfiction
minghoe but it's on his other account: vernonseyebrows
verdone okay y tho
minghoe the jicheol fics are my favorite
minghoe verkwan coming in at a close second, tied with jihan fics
minghoe jihancheol hybrid fics hitting the 4th place bc those are my Guilty Pleasure
goodgemini DON'T READ THEM
goodgemini PLS SPARE ME
goodgemini WHERE'D ALL OF U GO
goodgemini OH GOD UR READING THEM AREN'T YOU
goodgemini I'M RUNNING AWAY
goodgemini I CAN'T EVEN LOOK ANY OF YOU IN THE EYES ANYMORE
goodgemini I'M GOING TO GO BECOME THE 10th MEMBER OF TWICE GOOD BYE
goodgemini NAYEON NOONA I'M COMING
mother guys junhui's fics are actually good
whatwoo tbh he could write a book and i'd read it
memegyu what a praise from wonwoo
woozi he could make some serious bank writing porn
goodgemini sTOp IT
tallbeagle .... my innocence is gone
goodgemini GOD SANHA NO
mother SANHA MY CHILD
angelface JUNHUI YOU'VE CORRUPTED HIM
therock dude thanks now things can get interesting
tallbeagle IT'S NOT THAT FAR GONE MINHYUK
father MINHYUK STAY AWAY FROM SANHA
mother B A D INFLUENCE
HOSH park minhyuk u spicy minx
dino-saur honestly not the worst stuff i've read
dino-saur could be kinkier
memegyu [image] binwoo explain
hitthekwan there is no heterosexual explanation
memegyu that is truly pretty Gay
jisooschrist @ sanha in the back same
tallbeagle idk i like it when binwoo kiss
tallbeagle it's like a drama
woozi u think now that like half the kpop industry is gay they'll start making dramas gay
HOSH BOI THEY SHOULD MAKE A DRAMA BASED OFF BINWOO'S RELATIONSHIP THAT SPARKED GAYPOP
therock SOMEONE WRITE IT
minghoe have junhui do it
mother JUNHUI WRITE THE SCRIPT FOR A BL DRAMA
dad TBH I would watch it.
hitthekwan WHO WOULDN'T
goodgemini Y'ALL ENOUGH ABOUT THE WRITING I'M SO EMBARRASED
dkcountryreturns no we can't stop,,, ur badboy x nerd fics are so cliche but so good
hitthekwan I LOVE NEW YORK
hitthekwan IT'S SO BIG AND LOUD
hitthekwan AND GAY PEEOPLE ARE EVERYWHERE
angelface we're going to visit time square tonight, right?
jisooschrist yes we have to go
whatwoo yes, but that's not for a few hours
whatwoo i need to hit up the giant barnes & noble asap
whatwoo mingyu ur coming with me
memegyu yes sir
minghoe i'm going to stalk the theaters on broadway with chan and sanha
chachawoo bin and i are going to the giant toys r us and riding the on the ferris wheel if anyone wants to joing
woozi YO SEUNGCHEOL AND I WILL BE RIGHT OVER
verdone seungkwan and i are going to get some pizza and then meet up with my random friends from when i was 4 yrs old
hitthekwan i'm only doing it for the pizza
HOSH ur a brave man boo seungkwan
dkcountryreturns soonyoung and i are going to dance in the middle of the sidewalk and see if anyone will put money in a hat
angelface try not to get kidnapped by fangirls
jisooschrist (or fanboys)
HOSH we will ;)
father myungjun and i are taking minhyuk out for burgers
therock sanha why did u have to leave me :,(
tallbeagle i wanna see the cast of dear evan hanson sorry hyukie
tallbeagle we'll hang out for the rest of the week!!
therock okay :,)
' yo yo yo nyc proposal 2k17 '
jisooschrist todAY Is THE dAy
' bling bling wedding ring '
angelface TODAY IS THE DAY I GET MY FIANCE
angelface I'M GONNA HAVE TO NOT BE SOBER FOR THIS
' y does jihan do this to us '
dad The dreaded day.
memegyu only an hour left
father until mayhem will ensue
verdone guys we are gonna have to split up
verdone half of us sing with jeonghan, half with jisoo
puppycat this is gonna be a mess no matter what
tallbeagle it's okay guys!! we can do it!!
dino-saur whoop whoop
mother i need caffeine so i don't pass out from stress
HOSH i'm already sweating and y'all k now how much i sweat
dkcountryreturns it's okay babe i still love u <3
woozi ew sweat
HOSH I WILL FIGHT U So HARD
woozi see you in court sweaty :)
' OT19 '
angelface OK TIMES SQUARE TIME WHOOP WHOOP
jisooschrist LETS GO LETS GO LETS GO
dad Guys, chill. Let's us get dressed.
jisooschrist sorrrry im alittle anxious
angelface me too metoo
mother we'll meet u guys in the hotel lobby
' y does jihan do this to us '
mother good luck guys, we're gonna need it
Times Square was busy this particular Saturday afternoon. Camps on field trips had teenagers roaming around the city, mouths and eyes wide open in awe. Business men and women shuffled across the busy streets, stone faced and most likely talking on the phone. Small children joyfully played around with the many costumed characters, as their parents groaned, knowing that these people would ask for money when their son or daughter pleaded for a picture. When a group of 19 young asian men entered, not a lot of people noticed. Some young teenagers stared, but all the men were surprising attractive; what are the odds that so many good looking people could all be together at once?
Once the camera crew (although small) came out and the boys looked like they were starting something, the people on the streets started to notice them more. They were confused, these boys were speaking in their native tongue, and no one could make out the jumbled korean spilling from them. A tall boy with pastel hair took out his guitar, and began tuning. Everyone other than two young men split into half, facing each other. The forming crowd could tell that the group was nervous, but they ignored that in anticipation of what was to come. Once the instrument was tuned, the boy shakely counted off before strumming a tune only few people in the crowd would recognize.
The two men who did not separate earlier both stood forward at the same time the song started and began to sing. It was obvious neither expected the other to do the same, but they were trained enough to continue through their surprise and confusion. Their voices complimented each other beautifully, and although it wasn't rehearsed before, they distributed the lines fairly. In the background, the rest of the group sang backup and brought the whole show together very nicely. The crowd has doubled since it began, and some young girls and boys with cellphones were even singing along. Although most did not understand the lyrics, they could feel the raw emotion coming from the main vocalists' voices. It made the crowd almost swoon, the amount of love that was spread through the song was palpable.
The background singers were clearly surprised, even relieved as they sang and saw how well their impromptu performance was going. A shorter man paused his singing to blow loudly in a tissue and wipe away stray tears before he continued to sing. As the song came to a close both of the men got down onto one knee. The crowd knew where this was going, so they began to clap and cheer as the two men both brought out similar looking boxes from their pockets. The background singers continued to softly hum the melody of the song as the two men gaped at the other's identical actions. The taller blond began talking first, although choked up from the overwhelming emotion he was feeling. No one except the group understood what he was saying, but their faces told it all. As the blond finished up his proposal, the smaller brunet started where he left off. The crowd assumed he was doing the same thing that his partner did, and the shouts and cheering from the crowd were louder than before as the two men nodded, embraced, and placed a ring on each other's hand.
At this point, most of everyone who was witnessing this event was crying. Women and young girls clutched at each other and the men tried to hide their emotions by coughing out their choked up feelings.
There was a lot of manly coughing.
The group of 19 (all crying and manly coughing) embraced the newly engaged couple and turned to the crowd. The brunet fiance and another boy with light brown hair stepped forward. They explained (in english) who this group was and basically what happened. The crowd seemed pleased that they witnessed 2 of the best kpop groups of the year complete a wonderful proposal in front of them, and began to cheer once again. Phones were whipped out, pictures were taken, and soon the news of the newly engaged Jisoo and Jeonghan was spreading across social media like a wildfire.
' OT19 '
angelface DID U GUYS REALLY KNOW JISOO WAS GOING TO PROPOSE AS WELL AND NOT TELL ME!?!?!?!??!
angelface OR TELL HIM I WAS GOINGTO PROPOSE!!?!?!?
angelface YEAH OOPS, CHOI SEUNGCHEOL
angelface I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW I NEARLY SHIT MYSELF WHEN JISOO STARTED SINGING AS WELL
jisooschrist i think that worked out wonderfully!!
jisooschrist hannie we're trending on twitter! this is awesome!
angelface MY HAIR IS TURNING GREY
angelface but yes my dear /fiance/, it is awesome
mother i had no idea it was going to turn out that well
chachawoo i'm glad we got it recorded!!
verdone i seriously thought that was gonna flop so hard
dkcountryreturns now i wanna get married :((((
woozi WE ALREADY HAVE TO ARRANGE AND PLAN AND GET THROUGH ONE WEDDING,,,, WE AREN'T GOING TO DO ANOTHER FOR LIKE 2334 YEARS OK
jisooschrist hehehe guys i'm gonna get MARRIED
jisooschrist to JEONGHAN
jisooschrist how dope is that
dino-saur i need a nap after all that
minghoe i need to sleep for like 37 years
father sanha and minhyuk are asleep in the uber with us
puppycat minhyuk snores
hitthekwan so does hansol
verdone i do NOT
hitthekwan ok whatever u say big boy
jisooschrist i love you so <333
angelface i love you to <333
dino-saur i love myself and chicken nuggets <33333333
Chapter 13: oh golly
is that gd? also marvel and nasty gyu
AAHHHH I'M SO SORRY IT'S BEEN SO LONG
i was on vacation at my lakehouse in Maine, and unfortunately i didn't have wifi until saturday, and then i had like no!!ideas!!! but anyway i hope you guys like this!! it's kinda forced and cringy but it's here!!
also if u guys want to see anything in this fic pls leave a comment bc i need more Good Content lolol
idk an update on me~~ i might start updating stan wars again bc suddenly people are commenting and giving it kudos so ?????? and now both my little sisters are away at a sleepover camp for two weeks so now i can just sit and write without being bothered so !!!!!
also- a few weeks ago i made a twitter and rn i really only rt stuff but if u wanna talk to me it's @ asteroidsanha ,, i mean u don't have to follow me but if u do hit me up in the dm's and we can chat about astro, seventeen, kpop in general, how your day has been going, what u ate for dinner last night, idk!!
enjoy this short chapter!! (btw i fixed the links so there's no sketchy redirecting!!)
haehaebae ok can we all admit that lee chan has had the best fucking glow up in kpop history
haehaebae like he went from this: [image]
goodgemini who r u
mynameisminhoe i agree
mynameisminhoe even i didn't glow up that good
memgyu haechan? minho? how did u guys get in here???
bacon if i was younger i'd totally hyu chan ;)
dino-saur help me
taentedluv chan went from shark boi to lava gurl
taentedluv bc he's hot
angelface STOP SAYING THIS STUFF ABOUT MY BABY
dino-saur i'm not ur baby jeonghan
angelface dINO WHOSE BABY ARE YOU
dino-saur not urs
angelface JISOO BABY HOLD ME
jisooschrist one minute babe i need to figure out y there's suddenly a shit ton of random idols in thischat
tallbeagle hi donghyuk!! how's things!!!??? ( ´ ▽ ` )ﾉ
haehaebae good goood good hbu babe
tallbeagle oh i'm good! thanks for asking! (*´∀`*)
bacon oh god he's adorable
bacon i'll take him pls
mother u got to admit the kaomojis make him 10 times cuter
puppycat ur welcome for showing them to him
bangthewang no baekhyun i want him
bacon go away jackson
woozi y r u all here
chachawoo i'm confused
kendoll can i take sanha
jinnyweasle ken no~~~ joon and i have claimed him already
angelface i think tf not u trick ass bitch
dkcountryreturns jeonghan calm down
whatwoo yo guys what's up
memegyu apparently sanha
notanidol i'll take him
wonwho GO BACK TO TWITTER JAE
notanidol y i ke s
lalalalisa i'll take him
lalalalisa us gg's will take him
wendyschickenfries yo i want him too
father this is overwhelming
tallbeagle stop it guys ⁄(⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄
mynameisminhoe I JUST GASPED
yoooojung I'LL TAKE U SANHA
father yoU HAVEN'T EVEN DEBUTED YET YOOJUNG GO FOCUS
yoooojung but sanha :,(
yoooojung fine,,, i still can't believe they named up weki meki
no-yeon twice will take him
mother heejun,,, no
taeyeonie i will have him
bacon GOTTA GO SORRY SANHA CATCH U LATER
bacon has left ' OT19 '
verdone it isn't really ot19 rn now
minghoe IT WILL ALWAYS BE OT19
minghoe EVEN WITH THESE IRRELEVANT PPL
minghoe oh god
minghoe EVERYONE EXCEPT U KING JIYONG
dad How is G-Dragon in our chatroom?
gd idk i just entered the code seungkwan sent out and here i am
gd also sanha ur cute as fuck so u can come to me if u want to
hitthekwan ,,,, helloooo
therock SEUNGKWAN FOR THE PAST 15 MINUTES I'VE HAD TO ENDURE ALL THESE IDOLS FIGHTING OVER MY BOYFRIEND THIS IS ALL UR FAULT
therock EVEN GDRAGON WANTS HIM
therock WHO WOULD TURN DOWN GD
therock ESPECIALLY OVER ME
tallbeagle i would!
wendyschickenfries commitment right there
hitthekwan also gd sunbaenim i can't believe u actually used the code
gd eh i was bored so y not
woozi ur a legend
gd so r u
dad Jihoon just fainted can somebody get me some grape juice?
HOSH lol on it!
taeyeonie jeonghan and jisoo congrats on your engagement by the way!
angelface THANK U TAEYEON
jisooschrist !!!! <3333 :DDDD
tallbeagle i'm so touched by u guys fighting over me but can u guys please leave the chat? it's very overwhelming for minhyuk :(((( he's very distressed right now (╯•﹏•╰)
jinnyweasle oh dear~~ of course
lalalalisa sorry babes
heeheejun yo if u ever get tired of rocky hmu baby boi
angelface GET HIM OUT OF HERE
mother HEEJUN I'M CALLING JIHUN
gd nice talking with y'all
wonwho we should do this again sometime
whatwoo no we shouldn't
no-yeon later losers
woozi seungkwan can u remove them
hitthekwan on it!
hitthekwan sorrrry guys and gals thanks for joining it's been good
hitthekwan removed 15 users from chat
whatwoo oh thank god
therock THAT WAS SO PAINFUL
father we had like 30 people in here how is that possible
HOSH we had some Legends in here
HOSH seungkwan howd u do it
verdone i rly don't wanna know
mother i felt Threatened
angelface myungjun i'm next in line for sanha right? before all those others? :,)
mother yes u r jeonghan how many times do i have to tell u
talllbeagle u guys realize i have my own family right? lol :D
puppycat if we were superheros in the marvel universe who would we be???
mother IRON MAN
father does that mean i'm pepper potts
jisooschrist captain america
jisooschrist jeonghan is the bucky barnes to my steve rogers
jisooschrist they both had long hair too uwu
angelface but bucky is the winter soldier and evil
jisooschrist BUCKY IS NOT EVIL HE WAS ABUSED AND BRAINWASHED HEIS ADORABLE AND I LOVE HIM
angelface gasp u love bucky
angelface HELLO I'M JAMES BUCHANAN BARNES ALSO KNOWN AS BUCKY I LOVE STEVE ROGERS AKA CAPTAIN AMERICA AKA HONG JISOO
verdone THAN I'M DEADPOOL
puppycat awh i wanted iron man
chachawoo can i be gru from despicable me
HOSH 1: nO
HOSH 2: THAT'S NOT EVEN MARVEL?!?!
HOSH 3: GRU IS A VILLAIN
chachawoo he became a good guy :(
puppycat i'm ant man
puppycat dongmin can be sam wilson
puppycat love my marvel rarepairs
dad I will be Thor.
woozi hell no i am not being jane whatsherface
woozi i'll be magneto and u can be professer x
dad Magneto is a villain!?!?
woozi eh depends on the movie
HOSH i will be black widow
HOSH so i can be both hot and badass
dkcountryreturns guess that makes me the hulk lolool
HOSH u hulk out in bed ;))
memegyu soonyoung do me a favor and shut up
whatwoo can i be
memegyu dude ur beast from xmen
memegyu i'm havoc
whatwoo isn't havoc dead
minghoe i want star lord
minghoe jun will be gamora
goodgemini what if i wanted to be wolverine
minghoe oh well
puppycat is that everyone?
therock and sanha and i
angelface who do u think u are chan?
tallbeagle i wanna be pheonix! jean grey! she's awesome!
therock she is scary
tallbeagle !!! :DDD
therock so i am cyclops
memegyu ur my little bro ;)
therock get that winky face away from me ming ew
memegyu ok rude
goodgemini mingew is so accurate tho
goodgemini i will never recover from that one time
chachawoo what time?
goodgemini OH GOD LET ME SHOW YOU
goodgemini ONE MINUTE THERE'S A GIF OF IT SOMEWHERE
HOSH while he does that let me explain:
HOSH mingyu is so nasty
dkcountryreturns i don't think he knows that concept of germs
dad My goal in life is to train him to sneeze in him elbow, not his hand.
woozi and if he does sneeze into his hand wASH iT AFTERWARDS
goodgemini [link] tHIS IS THE NASTIEST SHIT
goodgemini HE SNEEZES INTO HIS HAND AND THEN GOES AND TOUCHES MY HAIR
goodgemini n A S T y
verdone IVE BEEN VICTIMIZED BY MINGEW AS WELL
verdone [link] KIM MINGYU WHAT'S GOOD
mother wonwoo are u srsly dating him
whatwoo unfortunately so
minghoe OUR FOOD AS WELL
minghoe [link] SNEEZES AND THEN HAND GIES RIGHT BACK TO THE INGREDIENTS
mother this is horrendous
memegyu ATLEAST I COVER MY MOUTH WHEN I SNEEZE
memegyu MARK FROM NCT DOESN'T EVEN COVER HIS MOUTH
jisooschrist well we aren't talking about mark, mingyu. we're talking about you
memegyu I'M BEING ATTACKED
hitthekwan changed memegyu's username to ' mingew '
mingew OK RUDE
mingew IM GONNA CHANGE IT BACK
hitthekwan locked mingew's username
mingew boo you whore
therock do u know there's a youtube video dedicated to mingyu being nasty
therock AND A WHOLE VIDEO OF JUST HIM SNEEZING WTF
jisooschrist do u know ppl actually have sneezing kinks
woozi LETS NOT GET INTO THAT PLS AND THANK U
verdone oh jisoo
verdone guys jae from day6 was here earlier right?
woozi ya wonho yelled at him or something
verdone he said jisoo is his bias in svt
verdone isn't that adorable
verdone [image] look at his tweet
verdone oh wait
angelface i think i need to talk to this ' jae ' character
jisooschrist ahhhh he's my day6 bias
jisooschrist he's from california as well!!
jisooschrist i should see if he wants to hang out sometime, he seems hilarious
angelface JISOO :,(((((((
jisooschrist yes jeonghan?
angelface i don't want you hanging out with him alone :,(((((((
dad Don't be pathetic Jeonghan.
angelface CHEOLLIE UR MY BEST FRIEND YOU SHOULD BE HELPING UR MANS OUT
jisooschrist babe we're engaged
jisooschrist i wouldn't ever do something like that
dkcountryreturns it's true
dino-saur he is seventeen's gentleman, him being unloyal is as likely as mingyu being hygienic
dino-saur (not likely)
angelface i know :/// ur boi just gets jealous sometimes
jisooschrist you have no reason to be jealous <333
angelface :))) <333
mingew LEAVE ME ALONE
mingew BABE HELP UR BOI OUT
whatwoo go wash your hands first and then we'll talk
woozi cheol remind me to get a big pack of portable hand sanitizer from bj's around christmas so i can gift it to mingyu
therock day6 is actually so cool
therock like they actually play instruments and make their own music
therock of course we do as well but like imagine if we all played instruments
HOSH lol but then we couldn't dance!
therock WE COULD TRY
mother oh well
HOSH jihoon would probably play the triangle or something
woozi kwon soonyoung i'm go to haunt your soul when i die
HOSH ooh scary
woozi don't try me binch
dad Soonyoung don't even rile him up.
dkcountryreturns last time u did this we had to make excuses to manager hyung about the huge bruises all over ur legs
dkcountryreturns we said u fell dancing but it's hard to lie about HAND PRINTS AROUND UR ANKLES FROM GETTING DRAGGED ACROSS THE APARTMENT BY JIHOON
father that is Aggressive
hitthekwan i was looking for pictures of jihoon with us bc i was gonna make a " he protec but he also attac " meme but he never protecs
woozi I CAN PROTEC IF I WANNA PROTEC OK
HOSH sounds fake but ok
Chapter 14: oops
a quick mess update
it's been like 36437958 years i'm sorry take this as an apology
anyway i've been on twt so much lately that's why i haven't updated if u want u can follow me @ hongjisood
also i got a request for sanha and chan fighting so i'm sorry if this sucks pls don't hurt me
therock okay so listen
therock idc what anybody says
therock seungcheol is the biggest snake on the block
dad Excuse me?
angelface i can't believe you would do this cheol :(
dad Do what?
puppycat all because of drugs, how dare you
whatwoo what are you talking about
jisooschrist shut up wonton u drugged me and framed me
hitthekwan YOU TOO WEN JUNHUI
hitthekwan YOU DRUGGIE
goodgemini what the fuck
hitthekwan YOU FRAMED MY BF
chachawoo what are y'all talking about?
father u didn't know?
chachawoo ok rude
dad Ok, what is this all about?
mingew seven what
HOSH sevenscheme, rhymes with seventeen
dkcountryreturns very clever, very clever
whatwoo jisoo did u call me wonton
jisooschrist i can't believe snakecheol, wonton, and july would do this to poor jihoon
dino-saur rest in pieces lee jihoon, you will be missed
minghoe sometimes,,, it's like i can still hear his voice,,,,
woozi i'm not dead you twat
mother seungcheol i can't believe you would kill your own boyfriend
therock technically soonyoung was his boyfriend
HOSH LET'S NOT TALK ABOUT THAT
father seungcheol i have one question for you...
dad I'm still confused, but sure.
father do you regretti the spaghetti
mother ok that's it we're divorcing
dad Spaghetti???? What?????
angelface you poisoned jihoonie's spaghetti and killed him
dad I did no such thing?!
woozi why did you do that cheol wtf
dkcountryreturns bc of the drugs
minghoe bc jihoon was gonna tell the cops so cheol needed to shut him up
puppycat by killing him!
dad I would never!
woozi sounds fake but okay
father i can't believe you seungcheol,,,
dino-saur omg guys i just fell down the stairs
mother sanha,, that's not nice!?!?!
woozi wait i was gonna say that
minghoe jihoon you aren't nice so that makes sense
woozi i don't have the energy to feel annoyed.
tallbeagle i am totally, incredibly, disheartened that you managed to be stupid enough to fall down the stairs. You must've done that a lot as a child, must've really messed up your brain.
goodgemini *sips tea*
dino-saur sanha choke
angelface WHAT THE
angelface LEE CHAN
mingew wait chan continue
tallbeagle i'm gonna block u chan
dino-saur try me bitch
dkcountryreturns im gonna have heart failure what is happening
dino-saur yoon sanha is not my best friend anymore
therock welp i'm not complaining
tallbeagle i will not allow lee chan to be my bff until he admits he is wrong
verdone chan does that mean i'm your best friend again
verdone u know what
verdone i'll take it
hitthekwan i thought i was your best friend :(
verdone you're my boyfriend, which is like the ULTIMATE best friend
hitthekwan okay :)
dad Boys, why are you fighting?
dino-saur none of ur business
angelface lee chan don't speak like that to your father
tallbeagle u just got scolded lol
mother calm ur tits sanha
tallbeagle i don't have tits
mother THAT IS NOT THE POINT
dino-saur mom i did nothing wrong sanha is attacking me for breathing
tallbeagle THAT IS THE BIGGEST LIE I HAVE HEARD IN MY 17 YEARS OF LIFE
dino-saur NO IT ISN'T
tallbeagle YEAH OKAY
dino-saur I CAN'T BELIEVE
tallbeagle THEN BELIEVE
dino-saur I WON'T DO ANYTHING YOU TELL ME ANYMORE
dino-saur UM HELLO???
dino-saur IT'S BEEN 5 MINUTES YOON SANHA DID U RUN AWAY
whatwoo ok but what happened
mother i have never seen sanha be mean
chachawoo i got a little nauseous watching it
angelface my baby,,,, chan,,,, being mean to my other baby,,,, sanha,,,, who was being mean to my baby chan,,,,,,
minghoe i think it was rather entertaining
goodgemini me too
mingew well that makes sense
mingew y'all are kinda evil
minghoe try me nasty
jisooschrist it's obvi they disagreed on something?
dad I don't know, it was kind of disturbing...
father idek sanha was so mad he was exercising
puppycat say what now
therock sanha????? exercise?????
father i saw him sprinting on the treadmill while listening to EXO's album
minghoe ooh boi
minghoe have u heard the eve
minghoe i'm pretty sure i had an orgasm just listening to the song
minghoe but then,,, i watched their stages of it
minghoe i have NEVER nutted so hard in my life as a horny chinese boy
goodgemini i would be mad that you've been getting off to exo but i relate so hard
chachawoo have you guys seen sanha lately??
chachawoo his phone has gone straight to voicemail and i've called him like 7 times
chachawoo also he left his duck plushie which he takes everywhere so,,,
mother oh gof
mother did someone kidnap sanha
mother u know what hansol go choke
mother iM WORRIED ABOUT MY SON
angelface guys chan is missing as well
mingew well shit
HOSH he took his phone with him?? someone call him??
dkcountryreturns i'm on it boo
dkcountryreturns goes straight to voicemail as well
whatwoo this is unfortunate
jisooschrist omg shut up wonton
whatwoo don't call me wonton
jisooschrist changed whatwoo's username to ' wonton '
wonton ok rude
hitthekwan chan probably went and murdered sanha bc of their disagreement
woozi that,,, is very unlikely
hitthekwan is it though?
hitthekwan /is it?/
dad We should probably go find those two.
HOSH seok and i will walk around downstairs
chachawoo bin and i will check our building as well
therock lmao goodluck
woozi this is your boyfriend minhyuk
therock bin dongmin im joining u
tallbeagle hi guys!!! :D
dino-saur why hasn't anybody texted in this for like 3 hours??
verdone whoop whoop sanha isn't dead
angelface WHERE ARE YOU GUYS
mother WE ARE SO WORRIED
dad Why were you guys fighting?
jisooschrist u guys better have gotten something to eat bc i accidently ate all of the kimbap
hitthekwan wait wtf
woozi chan come home cheol won't go to sleep untilyou return and i'm tired as shit
dino-saur sorry!! i'll be right there!
father sanha is there leftovers
therock they didn't even say they got food
tallbeagle don't worry~ i got you guys food!
therock do u know i love you
mingew wait so what was up with you and chan earlier?
tallbeagle oh, we had a slight disagreement over whether phineas and ferb can be considered a kids show
dino-saur so we fought but now we're best friends again!!! :)))
dino-saur lmao sorry hansol you're demoted again
dkcountryreturns aju yikes
woozi i just want to let you guys know that i love you and i know i act grumpy like all the time but i actually really care for each and every one of you and want you guys to be happaoiy and safe and eating well and i'm thankful that i have yall in my life ok goodnight
woozi i actually hate every single one of you
woozi i take it back i want all of you to CHOKE
Chapter 15: guess who's back (SHINee's back) (except SHINee does not make any sort of appearance whatsoever) (it's seventeen and astro who are actually back) (i'm sorry)
THE KINGS ARE BACK WITH MORE DISCOURSE AND FUN
"a cunt named papacita write a wannaone 2sung twitter fic y'all should check it out" hi you should ummmmm read jae's fic if u like wannaone because iTS SO GOOD I SHED A TEAR but the link is here: http://archiveofourown.org/works/12051102/chapters/27288456 check it out and you get one (1) cookie
it's been awhile,, i'd say i'm sorry but rly i'm just lazy and on twitter 25/8 so oops :)
welp i hope u like this chapter and hope you didn't forget about this trash fic :,)
also wendy, brynn, mckenna, jae, etc i hope ur happy i slaved over this
also follow my twitter and say hi ;) https://twitter.com/shuangelic
woozi FIRSTLY I WOULD LIKE TO SAY I AM,,, DISGUSTED
chachawoo is firstly a word
chachawoo ok continue
woozi I JUST TRY TO LIVE MY LIFE
woozi MINDING MY OWN BUSINESS
HOSH ya okay
woozi BEING A KIND, GOOD SAMARITAN
dad I mean,
dad Of course, Jihoon.
woozi i'm going to ignore that bc i'm traumatized but u are forgiven not forgotten cheol
dad whats happening jihoon?
woozi where is fucking soonyoung
dkcountryreturns 0.0 what did he do this time
woozi HE SENT ME NUDES
minghoe he did what now
angelface i mean
angelface oh hoon i'm sorry b
woozi shut the fuck up snake
woozi SOONYOUNG WHERE TF R U
woozi YOU FUCKING CUNT I DIDNT WANT TO SEE THAT GOD IS MY CONTACT EVEN NEAR SEOKMIN'S DEAR GOD THE ONLY DICK I WANT TO BE SEEING IS SEUNGCHEOL'S AND POSSIBLY GONG YOO'S NOT UR SKINNY PENIS JESUS CHRIST I NEED TO BLEACH MY EYES I NEED TO START GOING TO CHURCH I NEED TO JUMP INTO AN ACTIVE VOLCANO JUST ANYTHING TO GET THAT IMAGE OUT OF MY MIND
dkcountryreturns 0////0 soon u were gonna send me dick pics?
dkcountryreturns i'm blushing ur so cute
hitthekwan seokmin the-
verdone soon can u send me them too
therock the fuck did i come back to
goodgemini hansol no
verdone hansol yes
dad I would be mad about what you said about Gong Yoo, but I agree wholeheartedly that he is a gorgeous man and I would not mind getting nude pictures from him.
jisooschrist me too b
angelface jisoo no
jisooschrist jisoo yes
dino-saur can y'all stop with the no yes thing i am Tired
puppycat chan no
dino-saur bin i will hunt you down
chachawoo pls don't hurt my boyfriend
puppycat ya pls don't hurt his boyfriend
mother bin shut up
therock ya bin shut up
mother minhyuk shut up
woozi back to me
woozi soonyoung i deserve an apology
mingew yeah soonyoung apologize
woozi shut up nasty
mingew I BREATHED
HOSH i-i'm sorry
woozi thank u
HOSH NOT LOL UWU BITCH HOPE U LIKED THIS DICK
woozi soonyoung u better run i'm going to deck you so hard you won't wake up for weeks
HOSH GOTTA LUHAN
wonton ok bitch too soon
angelface What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.
father jeonghan what
wonton this is relatable
tallbeagle um ok!!
dad Jeonghan, what the Hell.
hitthekwan y did u capitalize hell
dad Why didn't I?
hitthekwan DONT ANSWER MY QUESTION WITH A QUESTION U SNAKE
jisooschrist seungkwan don't talk to ur dad (number 1) like that
angelface jisoo why won't u acknowledge my cute message
angelface FUCK WRONG ONE I WANNA FUCKING JUMP OFF THE BROOKLYN BRIDGE I'MADFKHJSDFFJDHK
chachawoo what is happening
dkcountryreturns why the brooklyn bridge
angelface ok i'm starting over
angelface jisoo is
jisooschrist awh ily han ur a sweetheart :D
angelface WOW I AM SO IN LOVE WITH YOU I-
goodgemini he didn't even say anything special
goodgemini ur sucha loser
tallbeagle that's mean D:
dino-saur junhui is mean
tallbeagle that's true
goodgemini i would be offended but it's true
mother JINWOO EATS HIS MACARONI. WITH A SPOON.
mother DIVORCE: HAPPENING
therock YALL. AREN'T. MARRIED. I'M GONNA. KERMIT.
therock but anybi eating macaroni with a spoon isn't weird?? i love macaroni
puppycat i love spoons
HOSH WHO EATS MACARONI WITH A SPOON I NEED TO KNOW FOR SCIENCE
therock me bih
HOSH that's why you're my favorite (๑♡⌓♡๑)
puppycat i do
angelface TF NO HOW DO Y'ALL USE SPOONS IT'S NOTLIKE IT'S SOUP
jisooschrist i use a spoon
angelface WOW HELLO FELLOW SPOON USERS SWELL DAY ISN'T IT
wonton i use a fork
mingew I ALSO USE A FORK BC I'M AN INTELLECTUAL
minghoe MINGYU????? AN INTELLECTUAL????? IN THIS ECONOMY????
minghoe anyway i use a spoon bc i'm not a dumbass like certain ppl
goodgemini did u just call me a dumbass
tallbeagle I USE A SPOON o(〃＾▽＾〃)o
dino-saur what did forks do to y'all
mother EXACTLY JUSTICE FOR FORKS
woozi spoons are easier smh
hitthekwan i use a fork 0.0
verdone THE LOML WOW SO PROUD SO HAPPY TO BE UR BOYF
puppycat spoon yes fun
father seungcheol how about u my old friend
dad I use a spork.
dad Guys, where did you go? It's been a half hour?
dad Um, it's been 3 hours what did I do? Where did you guys go?
dad IT'S BEEN LITERALLY 2 DAYS WHY DID MY SPORK KILL THIS CHAT.
angelface HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA (2)
mother HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA (3)
dad I can't believe you guys.
verdone ily dad mwah saranghae
hitthekwan mwah saran gay
puppycat mwah zaranghay
father mwah cilantro
jisooschrist mwah saucisson
HOSH mwah spaghetti
minghoe mwah salad
chachawoo mwah scissoring
wonton mwah salami
tallbeagle mwah bologna
mingew mwah zarg
therock mwah steak
dkcountryreturns my sarangi
goodgemini mwah sing sang sung
dino-saur mwah centipede
mother mwah celiac
woozi mwah c-section
angelface mwah serial code
dad You know what...
dad You guys can Choke.
woozi gladly daddy
Chapter 16: this is awkward
I LOVE JOSHUA HONG
thank u for your time
wonton fuck me up daddy thrust your hard cock up into my tight asshole mHHMMMM
wonton I DINT NOT TYPTW THAT
wonton IT WDA MINYGU I SWAWR
puppycat ok wonu whatever you say
verdone TIGHT ASSHOLS
wonton LISTEHDN ASSHEOELS ITW ASNT ME UFKGIN KIM MINGYU STILE MY PHEON
mingew me???? i would NEVER how dare you accuse me of such a thing
wonton eat my ASS mango
father MANGO FUKUSDFS
mingew as you wish wonu ;)
tallbeagle y'all nasty
angelface SANHA BABYE DIUASDHSD YOU'RE RIGHT THEY'RE SINNERS
dad Are you seriously in the place to call someone else a sinner, Yoon Jeonghan?
angelface shut up stringbean
angelface sorry autocorrect
angelface IT SOUNDDED BETTER IN MY HEAD DD;
jisooschrist it's okay you noob
angelface i'm not a nooB
goodgemini you're a noob
woozi you're The Noob ffs you literally walked around an arcade like a fucking CHICKEN and you laugh like a noob you're just a noob okay noob
minghoe i have the receipts to prove this
mother bIH SEND IT
minghoe [[[[LINK BIH]]]]]
mother fucign NICE consider that sAVED
angelface i hate y'all
therock i heard noob
therock are we talking about dongmin
chachawoo excuse me
therock sorry i don't talk to n00bs
chachawoo IM NOT A NOOB LEAVE ME ALONE
therock what's that?? i don't speak N00B
chachawoo bin help me
mother THAT'S IT JINWOO WE'RE GETTING A DIVORCE
HOSH WHAT AHAPPEND NOWW
father WE CANT; GET DIVORCED THINKA ABOUT THEC HIL DREN
mother mAYBE YOU SHOULD'VE THOUGHT OF THAT BEFORE YOU LEFT THE FRIDGE DOOR OPEN
mother MY POOR POOR STRAWBERRY YOGURT
father MYUNGJUN I LEFT THE DOOR OPEN FOR LIKE 2 MINUTES BEFORE TOU CLOSED TI
mother I AVOIDE D A DISASTER JINJIN!!!! A DISASTER
therock oh em gEE
therock AJVENT TOU HEARD ME COMLPAIN EVNOUGH
therock YALLA RENT' MARRIED
mother about that
mother we are?
minghoe you're what
puppycat YOU'RE WHAT
dkcountryreturns lol! funny joke y'all
father itwas myungjun's idea
mother THIS BOY COMES UP TO ME ONE DAY LIKE "HMM JIHAN ARE HELLA CUTE..... WISH //WE// COULD BE LIKE THAT... *BLINKS EYES INNOCENTLY* *MAKES THE :3 THING WITH HIS MOUTH* *ACTS GENERALLY CUTE*" SO I WAS LIKE FUCK "U WANNA ACTUALLY GET MARRIED" AND HE WAS LIKE "BET" SO WE UH
mother wE UH.... BOUGHT TWO TICKETS TO NEVADA AND ELOPED IN VEGAS????
therock you what
therock YOU WHAT
tallbeagle MINHYUK JUST FAINTED
tallbeagle also why didn't you invite us DDD:
angelface YES WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE US
angelface I WANTED TO BE YOUR MAN OF HONOR
goodgemini don't u mean best man
dino-saur no he doesn't you uncultured swine it's like the maid of honor but a dude
goodgemini DON'T CALL ME UNCULTURED SWINE LITERALLY NO ONES SAYS THAT
dino-saur WELL WE SAY THAT AND I'LL CALL YOU UNCULTURED SWINE IF I WANNA CALL YOU UNCULTURED SWINE FFS
puppycat I BEG YOUR PARDON I WOULD BE THE MAN OF HONOR
angelface MJ IS MY BEST MOM FRIEND WE'RE BMFS
puppycat I'VE KNOWN MYUNGJUN FOR YEARS SIT DOWN OLD LADY
dad Okay, Jeonghan. I think you need a nice hot bath and a good night's sleep.
angelface NO ID ONT I NED TO BETA THAT LDTITLRE KIDS SASS I DESVREDE HAT MAN FISNORS
puppycat IM A 98 LINER IM NOT A KID
angelface IM 95 TRY ME YOU BABY
dad JEONGHAN GO TO BED
puppycat okay im going
HOSH YOU'RE NOT GONN A COMMENT ON THEIR BHEAVIOR?!??!
mother so yes, we did get married. yes, we didn't have a celebration and invite you guys. no, we're not having a celebration
mother we already did that ;)))
woozi I Did Not Need To Know That
therock you're saying
therock that i can't yell at you whenever you say you're getting a divorce bc you guys actually are married and could Actually get a divorce
father yes that's exactly what we're saying
therock i've lost my meaning in life
therock what will i do now
therock i feel so
therock as if i'm not even myself anymore
therock who even am i?
therock why am I even here anymore?
therock I'm just a lonely soul, walking across the plane of eternity, lost, and helpless...
therock What is the true meaning of this? Why am I here? Is there a plan for me or am I just doomed to trudge along this damned land until my own legs have worn away? Is there an end? Is there anyone waiting for me to welcome me as I've finished the trials and tribulations that were predestined for me to endure? Why me? Did I do something in one of my past lives that has triggered my eternal damnation of cold and nothingness? Will I be stuck here as my loved ones continue to age and move on without me? Will I ever get to tell them I love them? I-
therock UFCK I RAN OUT OF CHARACETRS
therock THE MOOD IS RUINED UGH IM GONNA GO TO BED
tallbeagle well that was strange wasn't it! heh
verdone who wants to putme into drag
verdone did i stutter
hitthekwan well you made a small typo n didn't put a spece in between put and me so
verdone d ID I ST U TT ER
wonton why do you wanna get put into drag
verdone bc i'd be purrrrdddyyy
verdone gotta use my flawless bone structure for something!! ell oh ell
woozi cheol can i strangle him
woozi why did i even ask
woozi u better run hansol vernon chwe
dad Do I even get a say in this?
mingew what do u think seungcheol
dad Shut up Mario.
mingew WHAT HRE FUK I BRETAHED
minghoe then Stop
mingew MNGAHO WHY
minghoe : )
chachawoo that's a scary smiley face coming from minghao uhhHHH
verdone Y'ALL DIED AND I DIDN'T EVEN GET AN ANSWER
angelface sighs deeply
angelface i'll call nayoung and see if she can bring some of the girls over
verdone THANK YOU MOM
angelface the things i do for my children
verdone I LOOK HOT
dino-saur hOLY SUDFK SUNGYEON REALLY KNOWS WHAT SHE'S DOING
dkcountryreturns ALYSSA EDWARDS IS SHAKING IN HER COWGIRL BOOTS
mother SEND PICS
angelface ILL SNAPCHAT THEM TO YOU BRB
mother HOYL FUVK
hitthekwan HANSOL JUST DEATHDROPPEDI M YELLIGN I CANT REATHE
verdone THATS IT I'M LEAVING SEVENTEEN TO BECOME A PROFESSIONAL DRAG QUEEN BYE LOSERS
puppycat DO IT I DARE YOU
tallbeagle GO ACHIEVE YOUR DREAMS HANSOL
woozi i think the fuck NOT
woozi no buts
woozi I SAID NO BUTS
dad That was very father-like of you Jihoon, I'm proud.
woozi : )
jisooschrist changed their username to [ joshuji ]
joshuji sup losers
angelface JSOA FU
angelface W HAT HTER FUCK IT'S BAEN LIEK 2 WEKKES HOW DI
angelface HWAT RHE DUCKIS HAPEPNIGN I LVE YOU ??? BUT wh At
mingew the author was playign ebg and coudn't include josh unless she wanted to lose so josh just had to disappear and we all couldn't say anythign about it beacsue he coujldn't acknowledge he was gone n josh couldn't do anything aobut it either it's kinda wierd huh
joshuji ye i rly don't know what's happened i can't really remember the past few days iss STrANGe
goodgemini yes joshu
joshuji is this what being on drugs feels like
goodgemini I BEG YOUR PARDON
goodgemini ok fine
goodgemini yes that's probably what drugs feels like except to a much higher extent
goodgemini not that i know what being on drugs feels like
goodgemini bc i DONT
goodgemini but if i did
goodgemini that's what you're feeling rn
goodgemini I DONT
tallbeagle myungjun said drugs are bad
mother that's right sweetie : )
father sanha i think you should maybe stay away from junhui for a bit
goodgemini OHMY GOS STO TI RIGNOW
dino-saur are we just gonna ignore that joshua fucking disappeared for 2 weeks and none of us noticed??
dino-saur ok fakes
dino-saur @ josh i missed you lots
joshuji thanks babygrill i missed you too
joshuji chan is my fave kid y'all can eat my ass
angelface that's my job
joshuji ur right
father NOT IN FRONT OF THEC HIDLREN
angelface eat my ass jinwoo
joshuji that's my job
Chapter 17: DON'T DO DRUGS KIDS
this is wild.... i'm sorry in advance
don't do drugs kids
oof ! almost 3 months later here we are with another shitstorm excuse of a chapter!! i promise i'll update sooner i'm sorry heh if you have any ideas, criticisms, comments, uhhh comment them and i'll do what i can uwu mwah
also follow me on twt @ shuangelic
angelface joshua in mom jeans and fishnets: a concept
mother jinwoo in crop tops: a concept
mingew wonu in a full sized penis costume: a concept
minghoe w hat
mingew i said what i said
wonton i'm breaking up with you
mingew nO pLeaS OFDNT I LVOE YOU :((((((((((((((
wonton mingyu who? junhui r u single
wonton wow junhui's my boyfriend can you believe wonhui is real
goodgemini no it's not
wonton we're in such a normal healthy homosexual relationship truly goals
goodgemini please shut up
tallbeagle i am so confused
mingew so did wonwoo rly break up with me
wonton no dumbass
minghoe oh thank god
tallbeagle i've cracked the code uwu
father you've what the what
mingew welcome child how are you dealing with this revelation
woozi this what now
tallbeagle i know EVERYTHING mingyu hyung howdo you deal
mingew i don't
tallbeagle it's 17
mingew i know
tallbeagle YOU'RE 17
mingew I KNOW
joshuji water y'all talking about
mingew 'tis chapter 17.... and we're seventeen
minghoe do you dare me to push soonyoung down the stairs
dkcountryreturns please don't D:
angelface don't you dare
mother park minhyuk.
therock doN'T DO IT MYUNGHO
dino-saur that doesn't seem like a smart idea hyung
minghoe i can't believe you guys are making me do this
goodgemini we aren't
dad Xu Minghao...
minghoe i REALLY don't want to do this but if you guys insist.......
HOSH NOS ODNT PUHAS ME DWON THE STAURS
HOSH PLEAS E MINGHAIASO ILLS DO ANUYTHGIN
minghoe fine i won't push him down the stairs.
wonton what was that noise
mingew was that an earthquake ???????
HOSH HE DUFCIFNG PUSHED MREBDOW HE RASTAITS IM STSCIK I CAN'T SMOVE OR BRVEAGE HELDP ME
dkcountryreturns SOONYOUNG I'M COMING
tallbeagle you said you wouldn't push him hyung! :(
minghoe i didn't
chachawoo i think you did
minghoe no i didn't
joshuji minghao....... soonyoung is literally at the bottom of the stairs wheezing we all know you pushed him
minghoe I SWEAR ON MY LIFE
minghoe i didn't push him.
mother but what....
minghoe i might....
minghoe have kicked him down the stairs
woozi for fucks sake
woozi i'll call the ambulance
hitthekwan i'll call manager hyung
verdone i'll call my mom
verdone idk i just wanna call my mom
HOSH tell mama chwe i say hi
angelface get in the goddamn ambulance soonyoung
minghoe i'm uh
minghoe i'm sorry soonyoung
HOSH wait bitch
HOSH MINGHAO WHAT THE FUCK WHY
HOSH WHY AREN'T YOU SORRY YIU PUSHEDM E DOWN THE STAORS
minghoe that's for me to know and for you to never find out
goodgemini you ate his kimchi fried rice last week without asking him
minghoe THE FUCK BRO
goodgemini don't call me bro i'm your BOYFRIEND
verdone good one hansol
puppycat get out
woozi and never come back
goodgemini hansol go die
mingew you mean anyway
goodgemini no i don't
goodgemini minghao i ratted you out because you just dont
goodgemini kick your bestfriend down the stairs because you're petty and then not apologize
mother he's right you know
minghoe i'm even mad in FRENCH
wonton how is that in french
minghoe it has a moustache
woozi i'm like 79% there to kicking you out of the group
minghoe no can't do that
dino-saur yes he can
minghoe seungcheol won't allow it
woozi i'll make sure he allows it
dad You will?
woozi i will ;)
dad He will.
minghoe god damn it
joshuji apologize in person minghao
therock yeah do it myungho
father mind your own business minhyuck
minghoe don't copy my emoji
therock sanha help me i'm getting attacked
tallbeagle i'm sleeping i can't help sorry :o
therock you're.... sleeping
tallbeagle yes :D
therock than how are you typing in the gc
tallbeagle with my mind
hitthekwan with your mind?
tallbeagle with my mind
puppycat i- i don't understand
mingew how don't you understand?
mingew he's just using his mind
dkcountryreturns how are you doing that???
tallbeagle doing what
dkcountryreturns making italics????
mingew with our
minghoe can we go back a few seconds
minghoe you're asleep
minghoe and texting at the same time
minghoe using your mind
tallbeagle yes using my mind
minghoe i dont believe this
minghoe pics or it ain't happening
mother i'll go uh check his room
father im going too
mother HE'S ACTUALLY SLEEPING
father HE'S SNORING AND DROOLING AND EVERYTHING
tallbeagle stop they don't need to know about my ugly sleeping :(
mother I'M GONNA FAINT
father he did not move an inch or wake up when that text was sent
father his phone is right on the table beside him
dad WTF.... O.O
woozi i would make fun of cheol rn but..... this shit creepy
joshuji does this have to do with your convo from earlier?
mingew maybe..... maybe not......
wonton STOP ur weirding me out
tallbeagle hehe it's fun
therock NO IT'S NOT THIS IS WEIRD
angelface i think
angelface this isn't even happening
angelface we're all probably so high rn we're imagining things
angelface so the question is.....
angelface who drugged us
goodgemini excuse me
father so we gonna just pretend sevenscheme didn't happen?
father it's probably you, wonwoo, AND seungcheol
dad Now, let's slow down for a second...
dad I thought we addressed I did not kill Jihoonie or drug Joshua.
dad And besides, Wonwoo was the sketchy one in that whole situation.
wonton exCUSE ME
wonton I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO FEEL RIGHT NOW
wonton HOW DO YOU KNOW IT WASN'T THE ASTRO BOYS
mother okay, 1.
mother we are the astro MEN, excuse you.
wonton okay astro MEN sorry hyung
mother it's okay you're forgiven
mother LIKE HELL YOU'RE FORGIVEN
mother YOU JUST ACCUSED US.......... INNOCENT BEAUTIFUL TALENTED PURE AMAZING GROUNDBREAKING UNDERAPPRECIATED WELL-DESERVING CUTE FANTASTIC CRAZY SEXY COOL PRETTY MELODIC ETC ASTRO............ TO DRUGGING Y'ALL
mother too much?
father too much.
chachawoo i don't know what a drug IS
puppycat that's a lie
chachawoo is not
puppycat do you need me to pull out my receipts
angelface i agree it's cheol
angelface idk i just feel like deep beneath..... you..... you're hiding something
woozi don't accuse my boyfriend of something like that John Han
angelface excuse me
woozi that's right.
woozi john han
woozi changed angelface's username to ' john han '
john han gasp
john han how dare you gremlin
john han changed woozi's username to ' gremlin '
gremlin i hate u bitch
joshuji y'all......... i don't think we were drugged
mingew i swear we're just using our minds
joshuji idc about mingyu he's been weird from the start
mingew ok rude
joshuji haven't you noticed who's been a bit quiet the past few minutes???
HOSH sorry i was taking a shit what did i miss lemme scroll back
joshuji oh wait
HOSH BIWTCSHDF WHAT IS GOIN ON
HOSH SANHASADS MY DUDE...
HOSH HOW ARE OTU DOIN GTING
tallbeagle I TOLD YOU GUYS
tallbeagle with my mind
john han wat were u gonna say shua?
joshuji i was... tryna be rational.... like oh soonyoung is pranking us ofc
joshuji bc he wasn't talking uno?
HOSH I SWERAR I M NOT DOISGN ANYTHING I REALDAY WAS ON THE TOILERET
dkcountryreturns he was!! i can confirm
mother we believe u <3
verdone i didn't not need ur confirmation seok
hitthekwan i can confirm as well omo
verdone SEUNGKWAN NO
hitthekwan seungkwan YES
puppycat can we please figure this out i'm TIRED
dino-saur i'm tired too
HOSH seok and kwan just fell asleep
tallbeagle i'm already asleep even though i'm still talking beacuse
father we know
goodgemini because your mind
tallbeagle yes my mind
dad I'm getting really sleepy as well....
verdone SO YOU'RE TELLING ME
verdone WE ACTUALLY GOT DRUGGED
father apparently so
verdone HOW THE HELL DID WE ALL END UP GETTING DRUGGED AT THE SAME TIME
john han the doctor said it was in our water???
mother we all hung out at ur place just hours before we uhh were all high or whatver
dino-saur i hate this i have a HEADACHE
HOSH i hate hospitals
dkcountry 2 times in 2 weeks that we had to go to the hospital omg
gremlin this iv is making me dizzy i wanna go HOME
tallbeagle THAT WAS NOT FUN :(((
wonton we need a water filter
goodgemini i don't think water filter would have filtered out drugs...
wonton we need a water filter
joshuji the doctor said that our neighbors got whatever drugs they had or something in our pipes so that's how we all got contaminated
joshuji the pipes are getting replaced as we speak
dad I'm just glad we were found...
chachawoo we should both send our manager hyungs something nice
puppycat if he didn't find us....
therock we'd be fine omo
hitthekwan that's what YOU think park minhyuck.....
john han i propose
john han we just forget this ever happened
john han it was weird and i don't want the company to know we got drugged
john han or our fans
chachawoo oh GOD that would be a mess
dkcountryreturns it can be a huge secret
wonton it's not really a secret if 19 people know about it
wonton and that's not even counting manager hyungs and the hospital staff
tallbeagle OT19's first secret!!!!!!!!
HOSH OMG I LOVE SECRETS
hitthekwan OMG SHHHHHH Y'ALL ISSA SECRET
dkcountryreturns :DDDD A SECRET
gremlin y'all are children
gremlin plus i bet 10000 won that one of y'all already told someone the "secret"
dkcountryreturns i would NEVER
tallbeagle D; that's not how secrets work
hitthekwan how DARE you assume such a THING lee jihoon
private chat with gremlin and loey
loey i heard you guys got drugged
gremlin who told you
gremlin fucking knew it
loey WAIT JIHOON
loey HOW WAS IT
loey ANSWER ME
loey i see how it is
loey this is a personal offense
loey lee jihoon
loey :( fine. don't answer :(((((((((((
' OT19 '
hitthekwan yes jihoon hyung?
gremlin i KNEW you'd be the one to spill
hitthekwan me??????????????? never!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
gremlin my sources say otherwise you snake
hitthekwan chanyeol hyung knows NOTHING he's LYING
joshuji seungkwan sweetie
hitthekwan i know jisoo
joshuji you see what you did wrong there?
hitthekwan yes i do see jisoo
minghoe LMAOOOOOOO U FUCKED UP
hitthekwan shut up minghao you still haven't apologized to soonyoung for kicking him down the stairs
minghoe and i REFUSE
goodgemini i'm gonna beat ur flat ass one day minghao i stg
minghoe thats abuse
goodgemini then u better run quick so it doesn't happen
minghoe I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME
goodgemini i DO
goodgemini ur just a lil bitch
dino-saur can y'all shut UP
dino-saur you can fight any other time when it's not 4 AM AND PEOPLE (AHEM ME) ARE TRYING TO SLEEP
goodgemini sorry chan
goodgemini see minghao?? it's very easy to just APOLOGIZE
minghoe you can't make me
goodgemini i think i can
minghoe you think?
goodgemini i know ;)
dino-saur oh my GOD i hate y'all GO TO SLEEP
minghoe i-i m
minghoe i'm soraeywry
minghoe i'madkjfajas soryyawu
minghoe i can't do it
minghoe i physically can't do it
minghoe iaajdhmad soryadjasd
dino-saur i have a knife myungho
minghoe OK I'M DONE I'M SORYRRDAH GOODNIGHT