"This is the perfect time to panic!" Rodney snapped. "We're on a Hive ship with space vampires who want to turn us into mummies and the only weapon we have is...is..."
He waved his hand, unable to even say the word.
John looked at the innocuous towel he had draped over his shoulder. It was bathroom green in color and monogrammed with an ornate S. Because of course Sheppard would have fancy company towels with him on Atlantis; it made about as much sense as anything else that happened in Pegasus.
"You ever been snapped with a wet towel?" John asked. "Stings."
"It stings? Oh, well, we'll have control of this ship in no time." Rodney rolled his eyes. “If Ronon was here we’d at least be able to pull some knives out of his hair. How are we supposed to fight off a whole ship full of Wraith, Colonel?”
In one smooth movement John pulled the towel off his shoulder and wrapped it around the back of Rodney's neck, pulling him closer.
"You're a genius, McKay. You'll figure something out."
"You're an idiot," Rodney replied without any bite, and he allowed himself a moment to lean against John, hands on John’s narrow hips.
They exchanged a chaste kiss. And then another. And another. Rodney was seriously considering the viability of having sex in a Hive ship when suddenly something else occurred to him. He pulled back, eyes wide and fingers snapping.
"That's it! Let's go. And bring the towel."
"I knew you'd do it," John said smugly. He pulled the towel from around Rodney’s neck.
"I haven't done anything yet, you insufferable optimist." But it would work, Rodney knew it would. And when they got back home he'd show John a much better use for that stupid towel.